So sick of these AWAB (assigned wizard at birth) sorcerers who keep saying were 'not real magic users' because they think they're some dumbass Chosen One
Ah, the question posed by the Western RPG classic Arcanum: Of Steamworks and Magic Obscura (2000)
(The answer is no, infact they are the diametric opposites of each other)
You're 21, of course you aren't a wizard. That shit takes forever to study. If you're so eager for magical power I'm sure there are plenty of patron gods and magical entities out there that would be eager to bring you on as their warlock immediately.
Ah, see. That's how the church gets ya. It promises cool and powerful magic but in the end you're a glorified jehovah's witness. This is why I circumvented the whole process and just shoved magic crystals in my forehead. Sorcerers are the best.
that is so real but also you can just like. do alchemy. like its not going to result in much but you can just look up ye olde alchemy textbooks and make random shit in there. some guy on yt did that with a weird like anti-depression formula. not exactly wizardry but its adjacent so surely
also most wizard type things that arent spell based you can just do. poring over old tomes, having big stick, wizard robe, pondering the orb etc. and the cops cant even stop you(even though they want to)
Unfortunately, most books that have anything to do with occult history or the study of magic, thaumaturgy, conjuration, alchemy, astronomy, prophecy, etc... are horrendously pricey. Although some of the more well known western grimoires can be found as PDF's online if you are willing to look through enough sketchy websites to find them. Not to say, of course that one has to do any of this I just felt that I should mention one of the potential obstacles if someone wanted to study the history of occultism as a hobby.
Yeah but they're all like automated and just need someone to show up now and then to change the bulb. Society has progressed past the need for someone to be there 24/7 to turn it on/off.
I had this vivid dream once where I slowly trained my latent telekinetic abilities until I could move small objects. It felt so real that when I was finally able to move a dice on the table I started crying. Then I woke up and felt miserable.
Maybe you could start by aptly decorating your study room with suitable aesthetic paraphenelia? Try asking yourself what aspects of magic interest you and what your preferences are! If you like chemistry, perhaps you could decorate with flasks, and nice smelling dried herbs and minerals and books on the subject neatly arranged into an old wooden bookshelf. If you are more partial to the stars (wether that be astronomy or astrology or both for that matter) then star charts, purple drapes, and a telescope could do wonders to make your space more a bit more enchanting.
I hope this helps!
that's definitely a cool idea. right now my study room is also my bedroom, so I don't really have much space, but maybe I could still find some space for some small decorations. however once (or rather if) I'll have my own place I'll definitely turn my study room in the wizard room
Then I am quite glad I could be of some service! I hope all of your arcane aspirations fall quickly within your grasp! Please do remember, however that many publicly available versions of older grimoires have been bastardized in translation or faced intentional omission of certain details by whomever transcribed them due to antiquated moral objections or religious zealotry.
Despite all of that, goodluck in your studies!
Learn chemistry you will feel like a wizard. I was the only student in my class and the school got one of their old chemistry teachers back just for me because my grades made them look good. I was the apprentice learning from a secluded wizard in a high tower. I learned how to make things explode and how to make colourful flames. I learned how to tell the percentage of substances in a solution based on weight. I learned the bonds that hold together the universe and how we can bend and break them at our will for our benefit. It's magic. Be the wizard you wish to see in the world.
that sounds really cool, but unfortunately I'm three years in studying computer science so I can't really drop that. also chemistry sounds cool, but I'm not really sure it's what I want to do in my life, although to be fair I have no idea of what I want to do lol
You can teach rocks how to think, you're one pointy hat away from being a wizard
If you want to feel wizardier you can also get into physics, messing with magnets is relatively cheap, safe, and lets you have floating gizmos in your room, if you redecorate your magnets a little you can even pretend they're runestones
And learning a few basic runes so you can decorate or write with them can work, nothing makes me feel more like a master of the arcane than organising my course notes with section titles in futhark
That's fair. I'm probably never gonna do anything meaningfully connected to chemistry in the foreseeable future but I have no regrets about learning it, it's dope.
that sounds really cool, but unfortunately I'm three years in studying computer science so I can't really drop that. also chemistry sounds cool, but I'm not really sure it's what I want to do in my life, although to be fair I have no idea of what I want to do lol
-« I will never live in a tower » : a true wizard knows that any home can be a tower.
-« I will never cast spells » : what kind of spells to you want ? For healing spells, you can study medicine (even as a hobby, and knowing first aid is always useful). For Transmutation magic, you can study chemistry, woodworking or metalworking. For astral projections, drones exists. And for destruction magic you always have guns I suppose.
-« I will never brew potions » : How about cocktails ? Or then again, chemistry ?
-« I will never research magicΒ Β» : Iβm sure apprentice wizards learning how to cast a lvl 2 spell feel the same as an IT student learning JavaScript.
-« I will never have a spell book » : How about Wikipedia ? And Sci-hub ?
-« I will never have a familiarΒ Β» : you can adopt a pet (And thereβs nothing more wizardly than a old one eyed mostly black cat that has been sitting in a shelter for 5 years)
-« I will never have an apprendistΒ Β» : It might be a big investment, but how about children ? (Itβs like and apprendist but you need to actually care about them. Itβs the only difference).
I feel like the main problem is to actually look like a wizard. You can always grow a beard, but itβs generally considered unserious to wear a triangular hat and a large purple robe with stars on it sadly. We need to develop an modern urban wizard look.
Phantasie is a way to cope with what you can not be and Hhumor is a way to cope with what you really are.Β
Play some dnd and laugh about yourself for being a silly nerd :)
Genuinely felt a little better about this after playing two games:
RimWorld with a lot of mods and a few themed runs
Weirdly, Space Station 13 playing as a chemist kinda hit that feeling as well. You can also play as a literal wizard in that game, but I've not been lucky enough yet with the "are you the right antagonist?" lottery yet.
Go and mix shower gel and shampoo in the shower and pretend you're an alchemist. Hold out your arm in a certain way so the water runs down out of sight but emerges from your fingertips.
Correction: You can live in a tower, brew potions, research science that looks like magic to the uninitiated and have a familiar. No one is stopping you from doing that.
The fact that Iβm not a witch, stirring cauldrons, seeing through the eyes of cats, shapeshifting into dark creatures of the night, casting forbidden spells, living in a hut in a cursed swamp and the hut is much larger on the inside than on the outside. Shit sucks man.
Get into science or engineering! That's part of the reason why I'm doing it. Arcane knowledge and bending the laws of the world to my will! I would pursue magic in every universe and the nearest thing we have to it is science. Get yourself a scientific career now (if you can and want, this is just an energetic suggestion)!
Iβm almost 40 now. My beard is growing long and very rapidly greying. I told my wife when I retire Iβm never trimming my beard or cutting my hair again. Iβm still holding out hope my powers will develop around then. Need to find a good robe and staff in the intervening time, big ol hat.
I mean witchcraft is an IRL thing you can get into, and if you smoke enough weed, Lugh will start talking to you, and you'll believe you're actually the reincarnation of Cu Chullalin
If I learned anything from that guy in California that raises "Unicorns" and writes books on how to be a wizard
The trick is to just be insane and never shut up about it
if you want to be a wizard, your options are:
- play dungeons and dragons (or any other tabletop RPG where you can play as a wizard)
- video games
- LARPing
- go into STEM
- any combination of the above
significantly advanced science is indistinguishable from magic so what i'm saying is you should create hella a advanced mechanical body equipped with powerful weapons and tools which is identical to your own and put your mind in it and than forget you made it so now you have access to a bunch of things that could only be magic and you'll be convinced you are a sorcerer of some kind
Be the change you wish to see in the world (live in a tower, wear long robes, mix weird ingredients together and yell out the spell as you toss it at someone)
I'm so sad I don't have any magic systems I can easily abuse using my out of context knowledge :(
I would fuck up the established societal order like you wouldn't believe
i live by a creek and like to sit on a fallen trunk next to the mushrooms and the moss while having me a little smoke of the old pipe. druidmaxxing is the closest i can get to truly pondering a magic orb π
Just remain a virgin until you are 30. You're already on Reddit so you're off to a great start!
https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/30-year-old-virgin-wizard
i was born to be the mysterious little witch who lives in a cottage on the outskirts of the town with like 8 cats and a constantly bubbling cauldron that smells like cinnamon
I mean, that's not entirely untrue. Plenty of empty high places/castle towers you can secretly live in and gather herbs, casting spells and whatnot. Squat in an old castle somewhere, light some sage, and badda bing; you've got a start.
Damn wizard dysphoria be hittin hard πβ
Real π
Too real
So sick of these AWAB (assigned wizard at birth) sorcerers who keep saying were 'not real magic users' because they think they're some dumbass Chosen One
Wyzzphoria
Mf isnt that just science
OP just drop some potassium into water, it'll make you feel better. Or get some dry ice
Potassium!? Weak! OP just mix 9 parts ammonium nitrate fertiliser with 1 part diesel, then [removed by reddit]
hang on lemme try something
hobital
nah, just get some thermite and tennis balls, fill the balls with thermite, and [removed for the sake of brevity, but you know what comes next]
Actually yeah I'll concede that, make thermite kids it's fun AND educational!
Yeah styropyro is a wizard as far as I'm concerned
When's the last time you met a scientist who can afford a tower?
Ah, the question posed by the Western RPG classic Arcanum: Of Steamworks and Magic Obscura (2000) (The answer is no, infact they are the diametric opposites of each other)
Wizards do things that shouldnt work, but they do Scientists do things that should work, but they dont.
It's not sourcery, chemistry -ja'far, twisted
why cant you do those things? who's stopping you?
suhsiety..
SUSiety
Magic isnβt real. π
I can permanently fuse two pieces of metal together in my garage and it makes a startlingly bright light when I do it. That's fucking magic.
woah thats really cool pls send pics
https://preview.redd.it/9l2qmzlaz49d1.jpeg?width=104&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d157192f48462f12272df71c519f4688aa524a21
Not with that attitude
Become a chemist and adopt a cat!
oh yeah, I'm definitely getting a cat someday
Also move into a renovated castle
this might be a bit difficult if I don't get rich
also steal the king's gold with a sinister potion to pay for the castle
You're 21, of course you aren't a wizard. That shit takes forever to study. If you're so eager for magical power I'm sure there are plenty of patron gods and magical entities out there that would be eager to bring you on as their warlock immediately.
Ah, see. That's how the church gets ya. It promises cool and powerful magic but in the end you're a glorified jehovah's witness. This is why I circumvented the whole process and just shoved magic crystals in my forehead. Sorcerers are the best.
little uzi...
I'm so glad someone said it, being a wizard is a difficult dream to achieve.
that is so real but also you can just like. do alchemy. like its not going to result in much but you can just look up ye olde alchemy textbooks and make random shit in there. some guy on yt did that with a weird like anti-depression formula. not exactly wizardry but its adjacent so surely
also most wizard type things that arent spell based you can just do. poring over old tomes, having big stick, wizard robe, pondering the orb etc. and the cops cant even stop you(even though they want to)
I guess that's true. maybe I should start looking up some simple stuff to do for starting
Unfortunately, most books that have anything to do with occult history or the study of magic, thaumaturgy, conjuration, alchemy, astronomy, prophecy, etc... are horrendously pricey. Although some of the more well known western grimoires can be found as PDF's online if you are willing to look through enough sketchy websites to find them. Not to say, of course that one has to do any of this I just felt that I should mention one of the potential obstacles if someone wanted to study the history of occultism as a hobby.
IWNBAW
I'm sad I'll never get to be a lighthouse keeper so I get it.
I'll admit that I don't know much about lighthouses, but why would it be impossible? there are still some lighthouses around right?
Yeah but they're all like automated and just need someone to show up now and then to change the bulb. Society has progressed past the need for someone to be there 24/7 to turn it on/off.
:(
I had this vivid dream once where I slowly trained my latent telekinetic abilities until I could move small objects. It felt so real that when I was finally able to move a dice on the table I started crying. Then I woke up and felt miserable.
that would break me
I am a wizard, by some definition of the term
I require explanation
An adult virgin
Actually you can become a wizard if you're still a virgin at 30
... I need to know the exact definition of virginity
...uhhh idk ask the experts on 4chan
Maybe you could start by aptly decorating your study room with suitable aesthetic paraphenelia? Try asking yourself what aspects of magic interest you and what your preferences are! If you like chemistry, perhaps you could decorate with flasks, and nice smelling dried herbs and minerals and books on the subject neatly arranged into an old wooden bookshelf. If you are more partial to the stars (wether that be astronomy or astrology or both for that matter) then star charts, purple drapes, and a telescope could do wonders to make your space more a bit more enchanting. I hope this helps!
that's definitely a cool idea. right now my study room is also my bedroom, so I don't really have much space, but maybe I could still find some space for some small decorations. however once (or rather if) I'll have my own place I'll definitely turn my study room in the wizard room
Then I am quite glad I could be of some service! I hope all of your arcane aspirations fall quickly within your grasp! Please do remember, however that many publicly available versions of older grimoires have been bastardized in translation or faced intentional omission of certain details by whomever transcribed them due to antiquated moral objections or religious zealotry. Despite all of that, goodluck in your studies!
Yes, almost daily this week. I made myself a wizard costume, but I'd love to have some minor powers :(
Learn chemistry you will feel like a wizard. I was the only student in my class and the school got one of their old chemistry teachers back just for me because my grades made them look good. I was the apprentice learning from a secluded wizard in a high tower. I learned how to make things explode and how to make colourful flames. I learned how to tell the percentage of substances in a solution based on weight. I learned the bonds that hold together the universe and how we can bend and break them at our will for our benefit. It's magic. Be the wizard you wish to see in the world.
that sounds really cool, but unfortunately I'm three years in studying computer science so I can't really drop that. also chemistry sounds cool, but I'm not really sure it's what I want to do in my life, although to be fair I have no idea of what I want to do lol
You can teach rocks how to think, you're one pointy hat away from being a wizard If you want to feel wizardier you can also get into physics, messing with magnets is relatively cheap, safe, and lets you have floating gizmos in your room, if you redecorate your magnets a little you can even pretend they're runestones And learning a few basic runes so you can decorate or write with them can work, nothing makes me feel more like a master of the arcane than organising my course notes with section titles in futhark
That's fair. I'm probably never gonna do anything meaningfully connected to chemistry in the foreseeable future but I have no regrets about learning it, it's dope.
that sounds really cool, but unfortunately I'm three years in studying computer science so I can't really drop that. also chemistry sounds cool, but I'm not really sure it's what I want to do in my life, although to be fair I have no idea of what I want to do lol
Hey maybe you could try getting into dnd if you haven't already? You can roleplay being a wizard and maybe wear a cool robe.
oh trust me I already play dnd a lot, but it's unfortunately not enough for my wizard cravings
The closest I got to being a wizard is coding
-« I will never live in a towerΒ Β» : a true wizard knows that any home can be a tower. -« I will never cast spellsΒ Β» : what kind of spells to you want ? For healing spells, you can study medicine (even as a hobby, and knowing first aid is always useful). For Transmutation magic, you can study chemistry, woodworking or metalworking. For astral projections, drones exists. And for destruction magic you always have guns I suppose. -« I will never brew potionsΒ Β» : How about cocktails ? Or then again, chemistry ? -« I will never research magicΒ Β» : Iβm sure apprentice wizards learning how to cast a lvl 2 spell feel the same as an IT student learning JavaScript. -« I will never have a spell bookΒ Β» : How about Wikipedia ? And Sci-hub ? -« I will never have a familiarΒ Β» : you can adopt a pet (And thereβs nothing more wizardly than a old one eyed mostly black cat that has been sitting in a shelter for 5 years) -« I will never have an apprendistΒ Β» : It might be a big investment, but how about children ? (Itβs like and apprendist but you need to actually care about them. Itβs the only difference).
I feel like the main problem is to actually look like a wizard. You can always grow a beard, but itβs generally considered unserious to wear a triangular hat and a large purple robe with stars on it sadly. We need to develop an modern urban wizard look.
You can even learn demonic languages if you want (Hungarian)
Urban wizard is just goth punk
Phantasie is a way to cope with what you can not be and Hhumor is a way to cope with what you really are.Β Play some dnd and laugh about yourself for being a silly nerd :)
You can always be a rizzard, tho. Cast a spell on them hos
I have no game I'm not rizzing anyone π
Genuinely felt a little better about this after playing two games: RimWorld with a lot of mods and a few themed runs Weirdly, Space Station 13 playing as a chemist kinda hit that feeling as well. You can also play as a literal wizard in that game, but I've not been lucky enough yet with the "are you the right antagonist?" lottery yet.
With rimworld I finally could be a fish girl drug dealer that worships cuthulu in a girl only lesbian colony
RimWorld + mods really is one of the best wish fulfillment games
You could still live in a tower... or at the very top of a multistory block of highrise flats, the modern wizard's tower.
[ΡΠ΄Π°Π»Π΅Π½ΠΎ]
5 years are a lot you know? try not to worry about it too much, our time will come, I'm sure of that
Real π₯² I'm a chemistry teacher though, so eh close enough
holy shit breaking bad
Honestly, since my second subject is English it would be fun to make a "wizardy" session before the holidays or sth haha
FINALLY SOMEONE GETS IT
Hence we worldbuild, scribe
Get into LARPing, unironically
I've considered it, but I still struggle a lot with anxiety, and I'm not really good with people, especially ones that I don't know yet
me when i lose my virginity before thirtieth birthday
You can live in a tower doing chemistry and stuff
chemistry is just alchemy but we actually know what we're doing. brew them potions (hydrofluoric acid)
this but I want to be a cowboy
Go and mix shower gel and shampoo in the shower and pretend you're an alchemist. Hold out your arm in a certain way so the water runs down out of sight but emerges from your fingertips.
Correction: You can live in a tower, brew potions, research science that looks like magic to the uninitiated and have a familiar. No one is stopping you from doing that.
im not sure how to respond due to the fact that i dont know how serious about this you are
I wanna cast cool ass spells so I can just grab my phone from across the room
Sorcery dismorphia type shit
unironically yea, the lack of fantasy bullshit in real life genuinely is upsetting sometimes
That was me like 18 years ago but instead of a wizard i realized i was never gonna be a jedi.
I love being a peasant
The fact that Iβm not a witch, stirring cauldrons, seeing through the eyes of cats, shapeshifting into dark creatures of the night, casting forbidden spells, living in a hut in a cursed swamp and the hut is much larger on the inside than on the outside. Shit sucks man.
Get into science or engineering! That's part of the reason why I'm doing it. Arcane knowledge and bending the laws of the world to my will! I would pursue magic in every universe and the nearest thing we have to it is science. Get yourself a scientific career now (if you can and want, this is just an energetic suggestion)!
Says you
Iβm almost 40 now. My beard is growing long and very rapidly greying. I told my wife when I retire Iβm never trimming my beard or cutting my hair again. Iβm still holding out hope my powers will develop around then. Need to find a good robe and staff in the intervening time, big ol hat.
I mean, you could just come a chemist and mess with chemicals all day. just be aesthetically a wizard
You can be a wizard, go get a science degree
In a way. I'm constantly lamenting that reality is to grounded and unromantic for me to *really* want to live in it
not with that attitude
Science is magic OP
I plan on becoming a scientist which is basically the exact same thing
Maybe in another life β¨π§π»ββοΈ
I mean witchcraft is an IRL thing you can get into, and if you smoke enough weed, Lugh will start talking to you, and you'll believe you're actually the reincarnation of Cu Chullalin
For the wizards, all we call magic is just science. Start researching
If I learned anything from that guy in California that raises "Unicorns" and writes books on how to be a wizard The trick is to just be insane and never shut up about it
I used to get depressed because I knew I would never get an Omnitrix.
In a tower? Maybe as a monkey? Maybe to destroy every bloon that dares cross paths with you?
yeah im making a game
Unironically yes. I thought I was alone in this
if you want to be a wizard, your options are: - play dungeons and dragons (or any other tabletop RPG where you can play as a wizard) - video games - LARPing - go into STEM - any combination of the above
Everyone wants to be a wizard till they remember they donβt like studying or school
You can
This is why tolkein wrote 10 billion chapters of lore
Yeahhh, i would have made a bomb ass techo-mancer, chrono-mancer, or necro-mancer. I was and am still upset magic isnt real.
Quitter talk my friend
No
I think about this very often, the existence of magic would make life far more interesting at the very least.
Sometimes yeah. Feels like out of all the possible worlds we live in the lamest one
significantly advanced science is indistinguishable from magic so what i'm saying is you should create hella a advanced mechanical body equipped with powerful weapons and tools which is identical to your own and put your mind in it and than forget you made it so now you have access to a bunch of things that could only be magic and you'll be convinced you are a sorcerer of some kind
Be the change you wish to see in the world (live in a tower, wear long robes, mix weird ingredients together and yell out the spell as you toss it at someone)
Homie is too afraid to sell their soul to an Eldritch deity in exchange for strange and alien powers beyond mortal ken πππ
Warlocks stay winning ππ―
I'm so sad I don't have any magic systems I can easily abuse using my out of context knowledge :( I would fuck up the established societal order like you wouldn't believe
Yes. π
No, I'm only a little bit disappointed by that, I don't think I dwell on it often enough now that I could call myself depressed.
i live by a creek and like to sit on a fallen trunk next to the mushrooms and the moss while having me a little smoke of the old pipe. druidmaxxing is the closest i can get to truly pondering a magic orb π
Become an engeneer, psycicist, or chemist You bend the elements to your will, to make wonders. Wizard. Boom.
Just remain a virgin until you are 30. You're already on Reddit so you're off to a great start! https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/30-year-old-virgin-wizard
Well, I wasn't before... thanks for that
i was born to be the mysterious little witch who lives in a cottage on the outskirts of the town with like 8 cats and a constantly bubbling cauldron that smells like cinnamon
Become a chemist
Start researching magic then. Keep a journal and just write things about different spells you think of. Bonus points if it's leather bound.
You should look into getting a Chemistry degree
You should definitely visit the wizardposting subreddit (why is linking subreddits not allowed? π)
I mean, that's not entirely untrue. Plenty of empty high places/castle towers you can secretly live in and gather herbs, casting spells and whatnot. Squat in an old castle somewhere, light some sage, and badda bing; you've got a start.
Real as fuck honestly, wizard gang π€
idk im almost 21 and never scored it takes time to become a wizard
This just sounds like a research professor. familiars are just your phd students
[list of books on how to be a wizard](https://www.goodreads.com/list/show/127891.Best_Witchcraft_Resources)