Fully agree with you. OP should move out of that house ASAP because things won't become any better as the time passes by. From my experience those kind of anger issues only gets worse as time passes if not treated and if OP's sister already said that she will hurt OP then it might actually happen if OP does something the sister doesn't like.
OP please save your mental and physical health and move out of that house. It looks like your parents won't stand up to you no matter what so you need to protect yourself.
Edit: Misspelling
Yeah, I remember renting in 2001. Minimum wage in my state was $5.25, and my rent AND utilities (living with roommates) came to under $300. Today, minimum wage in my state is just two dollars higher, $7.25, and the same living situation would cost maybe two and a half times as much. This generation has a **much, much** more difficult time moving out than we did, and it's uncool to not acknowledge that.
I wish my rent was $300 woth utilities. I was paying 1k before utilities and I was paying for community College in a $7 ah hour job.
I can go flip burgers at Wendy's fir $18 here and a studio os $1600
No you weren't.
$7 an hour at 40 hours a week is about $14,560 after taxes. Let's be generous and round up to $15,000. So after paying your rent, that's just $3000 for the whole year, or $250 a month.
So you want us to believe that $250 a month covered all of your utilities, all of your food, all of your transportation, every other living expense, **and community college**?
It didn't. That's a lie.
But it did. I out my self through community College with my jobs program where they gave money each semester for classes. Transportation was free on public transport from the college
For the three years it took me to complete my associates I loved very frugal. Often times my friends would treat me to meals but I basicly ate pasta and home made sauce every day. I had a prepaid phone that I added minutes too every month.
I worked at gamestop for a year and half of that time. Then got a job at block buster making the big bucks at $10 an hour as an assistant manager. Then woth my associates I got an entry level tech job and took another 3 years and got my bachlors
Or call the VA tell them she has ptsd & is threatening violence. Let them put her in the psych ward for a few weeks. Maybe that will turn her ass around. I hope she doesn’t have access to guns?
Lol she has ptsd from what?!? a mean boyfriend, that’s some weak ass shit.. your sister is a shithead man and an excuse maker. Sorry she came back from the marine a piece of shit. You and your parents shouldn’t have to put up with that she needs to take her ass to the nearest VA hospital for some treatment and some medication 💊 so you guy can have some sort of normal life at home again, good luck to you guys!
You get free indoctrination, traumas, and get to be complicit in imperialism and genocide to make rich people richer too! SUCH an earned privilege, right?
check your privilege. the military saved my life from giving me an out from an abusive home. everything you described was my home life: indoctrination, trauma, imperialism, genocide.
My parents were abusive and yet I didn't even join the military because I was aware that it was simply exchanging one abuse for another. "Success" within an oppressive economy wasn't worth further abuse, trauma, or being legal property of the military. I never got assistance with health care, college, or any sign on bonuses, etc. Up until a couple months ago I was homeless for years. I'm not nearly as privileged as anyone who joined the military to maintain their life. Those are very substantial material privileges.
While I do not doubt that in your abusive family home there was forms of indoctrination and trauma, I'm also absolutely certain that your claim the imperialism and genocide within your home is an indicator that you have some confusion on the meaning of those two words.
For sure, here it is from Webster's Dictionary:
geno·cide ˈje-nə-ˌsīd
: the deliberate and systematic destruction of a racial, political, or cultural group
Now I'll use it in some sentences:
Israel is trying to kill everyone in Palestine, this is clearly a Genocide. Which is tragic and ironic due to the state of Israel existing after they demanded a safe space to rebuild their lives after the Holocaust was a Genocide across Europe by the Nazis. Hitler was inspired by the Indigenous Genocide carried out by the government of the United States, your former employer.
It's definitely not an easy thing to do, but the point is that her sister is already talking about hurting her. When you think that she came from military, she is way stronger than OP and she may know a lot of ways on how to physically hurt someone (and well she already started by pushing OP to the table).
OP needs to either really stand up for herself and find ways to protect herself and her pets in her own house or to move out to have a much better life without her toxic sister and family who doesn't support her.
Moving out at 21 in this day and age is nearly impossible unless you're a stripper, have a sugar daddy/momma or have an inheritance. If sister has these many issues, her ass needs to get into therapy to deal with her shit.
NTA
I’m no psychologist, but to the layman it just looks like she’s a bit of a c**t and your parents are her enablers, she’s historically shown tendencies of narcissism and now she has PTSD as a gold card membership to treating people as poorly as it pleases her, she kicked your dog goddamit!
In my uninformed opinion, she kinda got some comeuppance getting injured, and only earned it after the fact by taking it out on you, I’d be moving out ASAP!
NTA and your sister’s trauma or PTSD is not an excuse to be abusive and treat people like shit!! Your parents, or at least dad, is basically giving her a free pass and enabling her BS. Try to move out and soon!
NTA, but the moral dilemma is whether or not people who have caused suffering deserve suffering.
Suffering is not just cause/effect, it's cyclical. When my thought process changed from "you did this to yourself now sit in it because you're an asshole" to "you're an asshole, and I'd rather see you get better instead of just suffering because you're an asshole", I began to navigate these issues a lot more effectively, and without the moral conflict you're experiencing now. Food for thought.
NTA your sister's Behavior hasn't changed at all she was like this before she went into the military. Get out of that house with your dog as soon as possible then go no contact with your family.
Time to leave this now incredibly toxic home. Everyone has been through things, everyone has had hard times. It doesn’t give them a license to treat everyone like shit. She will only get worse because parents are apparently enabling this behavior.
NTA. She was angry and abusive before the military. She chose to go into the army, and came out even worse, and now she has an excuse for her bad behaviour - at least in your father's eyes.
You don't write if you are working, studying or what - but you should move out as soon as you can.
Your sister made her experience in the Marine Corps bad. I know personally know at least a dozen women who will tell you that the Marine Corps was the best thing that they ever did with their lives. I would recommend you move out as soon as possible as your sister is abusive and looking for someone/something to vent her anger on.
If you want to join the military, I highly recommend the Coast Guard. My own daughter has flourished in the Coast Guard. She was gung ho for the Corps from the age of 5 to her Junior year in high school, then she decided to go into the Coast Guard because they treat their people better.
Not the asshole. Military takes in a lot of folks with difficult personalities and usually makes them worse. The chinese say “you dont make a nail out of good iron and you dont make soldiers out of good men”. Not bc there are no good men in the military but bc it can ruin a good man. Your sister does not sound like she was a great person before the military and you certainly seem to think she has gotten worse.
NTA
Your sister was an asshole who was enabled by your parents, and now she's an asshole with PTSD who's still enabled by your parents. You need to get away from all of them as soon as you possibly can. While you still have to live with them, [grey rock](https://www.cnn.com/2023/08/04/health/gray-rocking-narcissism-wellness/index.html) the shit out of all of them.
Your sister sounds like she always was and always would be a total c*nt, NTA. Also, touch my dog in a remotely aggressive manner and you’ll wake up without a face
NTA
It looks like you might be the family scapegoat, in any case, just go no contact with her as soon as you can and never look back. She isn't worth knowing.
NTA. Your father is excusing her bad behavior because she's the golden child, the favorite. She needs help. She needs therapy to get through her PTSD and possibly even medication. She needs to see a doctor and a therapist/counselor/councillor, or maybe even a psychiatrist. That probably won't happen, though, sadly, so the best thing you can do is try to save up and find another place to live and then move and cut contact.
I would really love for you to go into a support group for veterans suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder due to service and explain to them how their PTSD is all their fault and they have no excuses for how they act because of it. I would really love for you to do that. Regardless what all the young people on Reddit will tell you what you said was horrible and petty. Doesn't matter what her attitude is or how she is treating you. You made a generalized statement about post-traumatic stress disorder in veterans and active duty military implying that it was their freaking fault they were physically mentally emotionally and he'll probably spiritually damaged by serving the country. Your sister has always had anger issues. And they have gotten significantly worse since she was discharged from the military. And if she was diagnosed for PTSD then that's pretty much in line with the course of it. But who the hell do you think you are saying that it's her own fault cuz she knew what she was getting into? Seriously. Walk up to every veteran you see and tell them it's their fault for their ptsd. Look them in the eyes and tell them to their face. Shame on you.
That being said your parents have chosen to support their post-traumatic stress disordered better and daughter while she recovers. If you don't like it move out. You're an adult not a kid. YTA for that comment.
I agree. YTA.
I am not going to comment on the military specifically because I do not have experience with that side of things. I do know that not everyone who is exposed to traumatic events will develop PTSD, and there are in-fact vulnerability factors regardless of the environment.
You would never want to live in somebody’s brain who has PTSD. It’s horrific, extremely difficult and isolating to say the least. It changes how you engage with literally everything in the world, especially your understand of yourself. And if you don’t have it, well you really won’t understand what it’s like unless you put in the work to research to gain some real empathy and compassion. There’s a reason there’s such a high comorbidity between PTSD, addiction and suicide.
You also do not know what your sister is thinking before, or after the outbursts. Which yes, can have a negative effect on others.
I’m not excusing your sister for the behaviours or actions. She is an adult and needs to take responsibility for her circumstance. There are many programs out there to learn to live with PTSD effectively, and using a program such as DBT (dialectical behavioural therapy), or CPT (cognitive processing therapy) or even better a combination of both. It’s extremely difficult and requires a lot of personal and guided work. It’s also extremely difficult to live with PTSD without professional support.
You are completely the asshole for your statements. I understand the sentiment but your delivery is terrible. And I’m honestly dumbfounded you could say those things out loud to your sister as it reeks of ignorance. (As do most comments on this thread)
No one goes into anything expecting to develop PTSD, even if there is a risk. This hardcore leans into victim blaming (although dangerous for your sister to fall into a victim mindset). [no one expects to go to a party and expects to get raped]
You are 21 years old, your sister who is 25 with 5-6 years of military experience, implies at your age, she was already enrolled (enlisted?), dealing with concepts and facing realities you will never have to deal with. And this is clear because your biggest struggle right now is learning how to move out on your own and pay bills like an adult.
Imagine what she used to do to her "abusive ex". You should reach out to him cause I guarantee she's telling you a different story. From what you described she can never take ownership of her actions and seems to always be the victim. But she's not the victim in this post at all. Instead, she's just a bully and seems to be emotionally abusing you! Gurantee, she did that to her ex bf! Have you ever heard of a smear campaign? She sounds like a narcissist. Did she take medicine for her ptsd or do literally anything to help with her behaviors? If not she's not likely to change and it has nothing to do with her ptsd.
Yes. I thought that’s exactly what it meant to treat a disease with medication. [give medical care or attention to; try to heal or cure. Is the formal definition of treat]
Regardless, do you have any examples of any medication that can make PTSD more manageable?
The same time it took you to type that paragraph you could have typed into Google " medicines that help ptsd" and saw the list yourself. Look up SSRIs and SNRIs antidepressants that help manage the symptoms.
I mean you mentioned it so I asked you to provide examples. Depressant symptoms are not the same as PTSD symptoms and often, these types of drugs do not provide relief to PTSD symptoms only sometimes effect the comorbidity of depression that comes along with PTSD. Not to mention these drugs are not typically effective for depression in many cases.
No, they are not the same, but certain medicines are still used to help balance the brain chemicals, manage anxiety etc. That can be said about taking medicine for any certain type of illness or disease? Blood thinners, lost of your sex drive, thoughts of suicide, high blood pressure etc can all happen from taking other medicines that are not an antidepressants. All medicines have side effects, and if they are making symptoms worse, you usually switch to a different med, etc, to try. Certain medicines work better for others. That's why you and your doctor usually try different ones to see how you feel, etc.
PTSD symptoms fall into 4 distinct groups. Intrusive memories, avoidance, changes in physical and emotional reactions, and negative changes in thinking and mood. These meds MAYBE will touch on negative changes in mood. The rest will require targeted therapy.
You should be more specific and I’d like to point out because it’s very ill informed and misleading. There is no medicine for PTSD stand alone, as worded in your initial post. Only the possibility to maybe target some overlapping symptoms.
Yes like any other mental illness usually requires you to do. Take targeted therapy and use medicines to help it. And no, not really. I asked if she was taking medicine for her ptsd, which is a valid question. Stop with the semantics. Just like how there isn't any medicine specifically for bpd (borderline), they are still prescribed antipsychotics that are used for schizophrenia. Why? Because it helps manage the symptoms just like how certain antidepressants manage ptsd symptoms.
It can manage a very very small fraction of the symptoms, maybe. I’m not and have not been disagreeing with you nor have I said your question is invalid?
Yes it’s called off label use. It’s a known thing. As any doctor prescribing the medications will tell you as they prescribe it.
You may not find it important to clarify such things but I do believe it does make a difference.
Your first two sentences - what a stupid thing to write. Abuse victim definitely could be this angry. Like the worst criminals that ever lived were abused. Sometimes abused people abuse others.
She's been this rude her whole entire life so stop with the abuse victim excuses. She was rude before the military and before she met her "abusive bf". What about op. She's been emotionally and verbally abused by her and yet she's not angry or rude. Stop using ptsd and other mental illnesses to justify and excuse shitty behavior from shitty people.
I wasn't talking about this case, just in general. And I was talking about somebody who was abused by an abuse victim, I'm not using it as an excuse for her behavior at all, I'm just saying it's not unlikely that she WAS actually abused, as you concluded.
I mean, I don't agree with what you said, if you went around telling people who served that they deserved to suffer for making that choice, yes, absolute dick move. But is your sister is being a bitch, you're allowed to be a bitch back.
NTA. Even if it’s difficult you should get even 2 jobs and save to leave the house. Why? Because she is not going to stop, and your parents aren’t going to correct her and you will only get sick. Families are complicated and when the bullying become worse can be dangerous for your mind and integrity. You don’t have to be patient with her, you have to own your place in the world away from her without depending on your parents. That’s what I would do… good luck!
Edit: misspelling
NTA, and your parents are colossal enablers. You can't control their actions or those of your sister. You CAN, however, modify your own situation by moving out, as you are a grown-ass adult. It won't be easy, but it'll likely significantly improve the quality of your life. Find a roomie and/or get a second job if you need to (I did both). You can do this!
NTA
Tell them both to shove it. Enablers to shitty behavior. PTSD is a condition one must make an effort to treat for themselves and others. It is not an excuse to be shitty.
You are 21. Just move and cease contact
Fully agree with you. OP should move out of that house ASAP because things won't become any better as the time passes by. From my experience those kind of anger issues only gets worse as time passes if not treated and if OP's sister already said that she will hurt OP then it might actually happen if OP does something the sister doesn't like. OP please save your mental and physical health and move out of that house. It looks like your parents won't stand up to you no matter what so you need to protect yourself. Edit: Misspelling
im trying but renting is so fing expensive where i live even with roommates also i have no credit history or renting experience
You know you don't have to live near where you currently live? Other places are available.
You can do it. My mother was abusive and I moved out at 18 making minimum wage. Speak to family one may let you stay with them
ty, i'll see what i can do
How many years ago was that?
Too long. Was 2000.
Yeah, I remember renting in 2001. Minimum wage in my state was $5.25, and my rent AND utilities (living with roommates) came to under $300. Today, minimum wage in my state is just two dollars higher, $7.25, and the same living situation would cost maybe two and a half times as much. This generation has a **much, much** more difficult time moving out than we did, and it's uncool to not acknowledge that.
I wish my rent was $300 woth utilities. I was paying 1k before utilities and I was paying for community College in a $7 ah hour job. I can go flip burgers at Wendy's fir $18 here and a studio os $1600
No you weren't. $7 an hour at 40 hours a week is about $14,560 after taxes. Let's be generous and round up to $15,000. So after paying your rent, that's just $3000 for the whole year, or $250 a month. So you want us to believe that $250 a month covered all of your utilities, all of your food, all of your transportation, every other living expense, **and community college**? It didn't. That's a lie.
But it did. I out my self through community College with my jobs program where they gave money each semester for classes. Transportation was free on public transport from the college For the three years it took me to complete my associates I loved very frugal. Often times my friends would treat me to meals but I basicly ate pasta and home made sauce every day. I had a prepaid phone that I added minutes too every month. I worked at gamestop for a year and half of that time. Then got a job at block buster making the big bucks at $10 an hour as an assistant manager. Then woth my associates I got an entry level tech job and took another 3 years and got my bachlors
Your sister has told you she is going to hurt you. Don't dismiss that. Take it seriously.
Or call the VA tell them she has ptsd & is threatening violence. Let them put her in the psych ward for a few weeks. Maybe that will turn her ass around. I hope she doesn’t have access to guns?
Lol she has ptsd from what?!? a mean boyfriend, that’s some weak ass shit.. your sister is a shithead man and an excuse maker. Sorry she came back from the marine a piece of shit. You and your parents shouldn’t have to put up with that she needs to take her ass to the nearest VA hospital for some treatment and some medication 💊 so you guy can have some sort of normal life at home again, good luck to you guys!
Sexual assault is very common in the armed forces; based on the info provided I’d be surprised if that didn’t happen.
https://www.jobcorps.gov/ If you need schooling and a place. Call them.
my parents were abusive. i ran off to join the military. free food, free housing, free healthcare, free job training AND you still get paid.
I dunno thus family doesn't seem to do well.in the military. Maybe she shouldn't follow her sisters foot steps
Her sister was already an abusive asshole. She’s just using the military as an excuse now.
You get free indoctrination, traumas, and get to be complicit in imperialism and genocide to make rich people richer too! SUCH an earned privilege, right?
are you describing my parents or military life?
The military
check your privilege. the military saved my life from giving me an out from an abusive home. everything you described was my home life: indoctrination, trauma, imperialism, genocide.
My parents were abusive and yet I didn't even join the military because I was aware that it was simply exchanging one abuse for another. "Success" within an oppressive economy wasn't worth further abuse, trauma, or being legal property of the military. I never got assistance with health care, college, or any sign on bonuses, etc. Up until a couple months ago I was homeless for years. I'm not nearly as privileged as anyone who joined the military to maintain their life. Those are very substantial material privileges. While I do not doubt that in your abusive family home there was forms of indoctrination and trauma, I'm also absolutely certain that your claim the imperialism and genocide within your home is an indicator that you have some confusion on the meaning of those two words.
please define genocide
For sure, here it is from Webster's Dictionary: geno·cide ˈje-nə-ˌsīd : the deliberate and systematic destruction of a racial, political, or cultural group Now I'll use it in some sentences: Israel is trying to kill everyone in Palestine, this is clearly a Genocide. Which is tragic and ironic due to the state of Israel existing after they demanded a safe space to rebuild their lives after the Holocaust was a Genocide across Europe by the Nazis. Hitler was inspired by the Indigenous Genocide carried out by the government of the United States, your former employer.
/r/jUstMoVEoUt
not easy lol
It's not But it's much better than being mentally abused day jn and day out
It's definitely not an easy thing to do, but the point is that her sister is already talking about hurting her. When you think that she came from military, she is way stronger than OP and she may know a lot of ways on how to physically hurt someone (and well she already started by pushing OP to the table). OP needs to either really stand up for herself and find ways to protect herself and her pets in her own house or to move out to have a much better life without her toxic sister and family who doesn't support her.
Moving out at 21 in this day and age is nearly impossible unless you're a stripper, have a sugar daddy/momma or have an inheritance. If sister has these many issues, her ass needs to get into therapy to deal with her shit.
I know multiple people who have moved out before 21. I have a cousin who moved out at 19 and that was in 2019
NTA I’m no psychologist, but to the layman it just looks like she’s a bit of a c**t and your parents are her enablers, she’s historically shown tendencies of narcissism and now she has PTSD as a gold card membership to treating people as poorly as it pleases her, she kicked your dog goddamit! In my uninformed opinion, she kinda got some comeuppance getting injured, and only earned it after the fact by taking it out on you, I’d be moving out ASAP!
>it just looks like she’s a bit of a c**t Excellent diagnosis
NTA and your sister’s trauma or PTSD is not an excuse to be abusive and treat people like shit!! Your parents, or at least dad, is basically giving her a free pass and enabling her BS. Try to move out and soon!
NTA, but the moral dilemma is whether or not people who have caused suffering deserve suffering. Suffering is not just cause/effect, it's cyclical. When my thought process changed from "you did this to yourself now sit in it because you're an asshole" to "you're an asshole, and I'd rather see you get better instead of just suffering because you're an asshole", I began to navigate these issues a lot more effectively, and without the moral conflict you're experiencing now. Food for thought.
NTA your sister's Behavior hasn't changed at all she was like this before she went into the military. Get out of that house with your dog as soon as possible then go no contact with your family.
Time to leave this now incredibly toxic home. Everyone has been through things, everyone has had hard times. It doesn’t give them a license to treat everyone like shit. She will only get worse because parents are apparently enabling this behavior.
NTA. She was angry and abusive before the military. She chose to go into the army, and came out even worse, and now she has an excuse for her bad behaviour - at least in your father's eyes. You don't write if you are working, studying or what - but you should move out as soon as you can.
Your sister made her experience in the Marine Corps bad. I know personally know at least a dozen women who will tell you that the Marine Corps was the best thing that they ever did with their lives. I would recommend you move out as soon as possible as your sister is abusive and looking for someone/something to vent her anger on. If you want to join the military, I highly recommend the Coast Guard. My own daughter has flourished in the Coast Guard. She was gung ho for the Corps from the age of 5 to her Junior year in high school, then she decided to go into the Coast Guard because they treat their people better.
Not the asshole. Military takes in a lot of folks with difficult personalities and usually makes them worse. The chinese say “you dont make a nail out of good iron and you dont make soldiers out of good men”. Not bc there are no good men in the military but bc it can ruin a good man. Your sister does not sound like she was a great person before the military and you certainly seem to think she has gotten worse.
NTA Your sister was an asshole who was enabled by your parents, and now she's an asshole with PTSD who's still enabled by your parents. You need to get away from all of them as soon as you possibly can. While you still have to live with them, [grey rock](https://www.cnn.com/2023/08/04/health/gray-rocking-narcissism-wellness/index.html) the shit out of all of them.
Your sister sounds like she always was and always would be a total c*nt, NTA. Also, touch my dog in a remotely aggressive manner and you’ll wake up without a face
NTA It looks like you might be the family scapegoat, in any case, just go no contact with her as soon as you can and never look back. She isn't worth knowing.
What was her excuse before she was in the military? NTAH
NTA. Your father is excusing her bad behavior because she's the golden child, the favorite. She needs help. She needs therapy to get through her PTSD and possibly even medication. She needs to see a doctor and a therapist/counselor/councillor, or maybe even a psychiatrist. That probably won't happen, though, sadly, so the best thing you can do is try to save up and find another place to live and then move and cut contact.
I would really love for you to go into a support group for veterans suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder due to service and explain to them how their PTSD is all their fault and they have no excuses for how they act because of it. I would really love for you to do that. Regardless what all the young people on Reddit will tell you what you said was horrible and petty. Doesn't matter what her attitude is or how she is treating you. You made a generalized statement about post-traumatic stress disorder in veterans and active duty military implying that it was their freaking fault they were physically mentally emotionally and he'll probably spiritually damaged by serving the country. Your sister has always had anger issues. And they have gotten significantly worse since she was discharged from the military. And if she was diagnosed for PTSD then that's pretty much in line with the course of it. But who the hell do you think you are saying that it's her own fault cuz she knew what she was getting into? Seriously. Walk up to every veteran you see and tell them it's their fault for their ptsd. Look them in the eyes and tell them to their face. Shame on you. That being said your parents have chosen to support their post-traumatic stress disordered better and daughter while she recovers. If you don't like it move out. You're an adult not a kid. YTA for that comment.
I agree. YTA. I am not going to comment on the military specifically because I do not have experience with that side of things. I do know that not everyone who is exposed to traumatic events will develop PTSD, and there are in-fact vulnerability factors regardless of the environment. You would never want to live in somebody’s brain who has PTSD. It’s horrific, extremely difficult and isolating to say the least. It changes how you engage with literally everything in the world, especially your understand of yourself. And if you don’t have it, well you really won’t understand what it’s like unless you put in the work to research to gain some real empathy and compassion. There’s a reason there’s such a high comorbidity between PTSD, addiction and suicide. You also do not know what your sister is thinking before, or after the outbursts. Which yes, can have a negative effect on others. I’m not excusing your sister for the behaviours or actions. She is an adult and needs to take responsibility for her circumstance. There are many programs out there to learn to live with PTSD effectively, and using a program such as DBT (dialectical behavioural therapy), or CPT (cognitive processing therapy) or even better a combination of both. It’s extremely difficult and requires a lot of personal and guided work. It’s also extremely difficult to live with PTSD without professional support. You are completely the asshole for your statements. I understand the sentiment but your delivery is terrible. And I’m honestly dumbfounded you could say those things out loud to your sister as it reeks of ignorance. (As do most comments on this thread) No one goes into anything expecting to develop PTSD, even if there is a risk. This hardcore leans into victim blaming (although dangerous for your sister to fall into a victim mindset). [no one expects to go to a party and expects to get raped] You are 21 years old, your sister who is 25 with 5-6 years of military experience, implies at your age, she was already enrolled (enlisted?), dealing with concepts and facing realities you will never have to deal with. And this is clear because your biggest struggle right now is learning how to move out on your own and pay bills like an adult.
Imagine what she used to do to her "abusive ex". You should reach out to him cause I guarantee she's telling you a different story. From what you described she can never take ownership of her actions and seems to always be the victim. But she's not the victim in this post at all. Instead, she's just a bully and seems to be emotionally abusing you! Gurantee, she did that to her ex bf! Have you ever heard of a smear campaign? She sounds like a narcissist. Did she take medicine for her ptsd or do literally anything to help with her behaviors? If not she's not likely to change and it has nothing to do with her ptsd.
What medicine exists to treat PTSD?
Did I ever say treat? Does medicine treat bipolar, depression? No. BUT it makes it manageable
Yes. I thought that’s exactly what it meant to treat a disease with medication. [give medical care or attention to; try to heal or cure. Is the formal definition of treat] Regardless, do you have any examples of any medication that can make PTSD more manageable?
The same time it took you to type that paragraph you could have typed into Google " medicines that help ptsd" and saw the list yourself. Look up SSRIs and SNRIs antidepressants that help manage the symptoms.
I mean you mentioned it so I asked you to provide examples. Depressant symptoms are not the same as PTSD symptoms and often, these types of drugs do not provide relief to PTSD symptoms only sometimes effect the comorbidity of depression that comes along with PTSD. Not to mention these drugs are not typically effective for depression in many cases.
No, they are not the same, but certain medicines are still used to help balance the brain chemicals, manage anxiety etc. That can be said about taking medicine for any certain type of illness or disease? Blood thinners, lost of your sex drive, thoughts of suicide, high blood pressure etc can all happen from taking other medicines that are not an antidepressants. All medicines have side effects, and if they are making symptoms worse, you usually switch to a different med, etc, to try. Certain medicines work better for others. That's why you and your doctor usually try different ones to see how you feel, etc.
PTSD symptoms fall into 4 distinct groups. Intrusive memories, avoidance, changes in physical and emotional reactions, and negative changes in thinking and mood. These meds MAYBE will touch on negative changes in mood. The rest will require targeted therapy. You should be more specific and I’d like to point out because it’s very ill informed and misleading. There is no medicine for PTSD stand alone, as worded in your initial post. Only the possibility to maybe target some overlapping symptoms.
Yes like any other mental illness usually requires you to do. Take targeted therapy and use medicines to help it. And no, not really. I asked if she was taking medicine for her ptsd, which is a valid question. Stop with the semantics. Just like how there isn't any medicine specifically for bpd (borderline), they are still prescribed antipsychotics that are used for schizophrenia. Why? Because it helps manage the symptoms just like how certain antidepressants manage ptsd symptoms.
It can manage a very very small fraction of the symptoms, maybe. I’m not and have not been disagreeing with you nor have I said your question is invalid? Yes it’s called off label use. It’s a known thing. As any doctor prescribing the medications will tell you as they prescribe it. You may not find it important to clarify such things but I do believe it does make a difference.
Your first two sentences - what a stupid thing to write. Abuse victim definitely could be this angry. Like the worst criminals that ever lived were abused. Sometimes abused people abuse others.
Yawn.
She's been this rude her whole entire life so stop with the abuse victim excuses. She was rude before the military and before she met her "abusive bf". What about op. She's been emotionally and verbally abused by her and yet she's not angry or rude. Stop using ptsd and other mental illnesses to justify and excuse shitty behavior from shitty people.
I wasn't talking about this case, just in general. And I was talking about somebody who was abused by an abuse victim, I'm not using it as an excuse for her behavior at all, I'm just saying it's not unlikely that she WAS actually abused, as you concluded.
Guess the ptsd patch got updated. Didn't know it gave you the "asshole" debuff.
I mean, I don't agree with what you said, if you went around telling people who served that they deserved to suffer for making that choice, yes, absolute dick move. But is your sister is being a bitch, you're allowed to be a bitch back.
An asshole for you and you and you
NTA. Even if it’s difficult you should get even 2 jobs and save to leave the house. Why? Because she is not going to stop, and your parents aren’t going to correct her and you will only get sick. Families are complicated and when the bullying become worse can be dangerous for your mind and integrity. You don’t have to be patient with her, you have to own your place in the world away from her without depending on your parents. That’s what I would do… good luck! Edit: misspelling
NTA. I think you need to move out. Start looking for rentals that allows dogs. Your sister isn't going to change because your folks tip toe around her
NTA, and your parents are colossal enablers. You can't control their actions or those of your sister. You CAN, however, modify your own situation by moving out, as you are a grown-ass adult. It won't be easy, but it'll likely significantly improve the quality of your life. Find a roomie and/or get a second job if you need to (I did both). You can do this!
NTA but nothing will change and it will only get worse since your parents enable her. Only choice you really have is to not live with them.
NTA Tell them both to shove it. Enablers to shitty behavior. PTSD is a condition one must make an effort to treat for themselves and others. It is not an excuse to be shitty.
I mean, yeah, that is kinda dumb what you said... so YTA for that part...