Boundaries. Sounded dumb and I didn’t think I didn’t need them. Turns out they’re needed in every area of life: even my own personal boundaries with myself.
Showing up for myself. If I tell myself I’m going to go to the gym and h to alarm goes off and I feel tired I’m getting my ass out of bed. If I tell myself today I’m going to put stuff away and not down the dish is going where it needs to. I have cut people out of my life and at work I am allowed to ask questions or say no, respectfully
Yes, just exercised it today. Hosted my friends for the night over. But this morning one wanted to stay for lunch and I politely told him to fuck off. I need my time to regenerate my energy.
It took me an embarrassing length of time to learn what was meant when people use the term in a social context. Not that I didn't understand some things are or are not okay. Just that I thought people meant actual physical boundaries.
"Save your money. You might need it one day." I used to be shit with money, I'd just blow it. Now I'm frugal as I can be, and i take pride in spending as little as possible. I'm not trying to impress anyone, I'm just out here trying to survive.
“You really sure you want to marry her? Because it’s okay to cancel the wedding..”
I wasn’t sure and I didn’t want to cancel the wedding and let people down.
Laughed at the meme of someone wanting to take a "mental health day" from work some years back. I thought the idea of mental health was considered weak and I was kind of a workaholic. Now I take it seriously.
Protect your hearing! Wearing hearing protection is 1,000x less dorky than *constantly* having to ask people to repeat themselves because you can't hear shit when you're 40. I work with two guys in their 70's who always tease me because my hearing is so much worse than theirs.
Sorry to hear that man’s and I hope you find d a reason to keep your head up but-
Walking doesn’t cure depression or make friends. They’re just saying walking is good for you.
If you’re depressed/don’t have friends/want to die for non fitness related reasons then fitness probably isn’t going to solve those things
Process your trauma, nothing helps depression except finding why your body is shutting down. I say this as somebody who has been depressed for two decades, depression is a natural state that happens when we don’t see a way out because our body memories are clogged. Body memories = repressed emotions.
Warmup before exercising. Work on mobility and stability. Take care of your joints and your body. Inflammation in your joints and tendons and muscle issues as a young person really reduce what you're able to do as a young adult.
Maintenance is always easier than fixing something. Eating well, working out, and minimal drug/alcohol use is important.
Finally got myself back in a good place at 33 but holy shit was my body a mess at 30.
Sleep.
When I was in my 20ties I could function quite well with less than 6h a day. Now I am nearing my 40ties and need at least 6, preferably 8.
I needed more when I trained hard or drunk alcohol. So I gave up alcohol.
This is my second advice - don’t drink.
Not making your own life the center of your world to live directly through first.
Also like another person mentioned boundaries to protect this. If you can't help yourself or be your true self first then you definitely can't do that sustainably when you're involved with others. No one can live your life for you, and how you treat others is not necessarily a reflection of how good they are, but a reflection of your own capability and this relationship you have with yourself in the world.
>- "Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one." - Eleanor Roosevelt
The biggest - got myself into a relationship in which I essentially gave my partner all my earnings, took out cards and loans for him, borrowed from friends and sold valuables to basically pay 100% for our living expenses and him AND for his shitty irresponsible behaviours on the premise of ‘he loves me’, ‘I’m glad I can help him during his hard (and coincidentally never ending) times’ and ‘money isn’t important, love is’. He had a poor-ish upbringing, and his father passed away in a very sudden and traumatic plane accident, and so I excused a lot of what he did because of that.
Took me years of lost peace and living like crap to realise this ain’t right.
Sad thing was I’m very entrepreneur-minded and been working since I was 14. If he hadn’t done me dirty like that I’d be in a comfortable position right now. But I’m still financially recovering from all that.
I always had a sinking feeling that this was wrong, but I convinced myself he would change. I held onto that hope for embarrassingly long. And with time, he kept acting even more entitled to my money, and showing less and less regard for my ‘kindness’ (which was actually a lack of boundaries). I guess as you get older, you fall out of that rose tinted ‘all you need is love’ mentality.
Eventually I came to understand what he was doing was straight up financial abuse of the worst kind. I doubt I’ll ever see all the money I lost because of him. But he taught me harsh lessons about time, money and abuse.
If it was said about you, but not to you, it is not your business.
I know, everyone wants to know if someone is gossiping about them, but someone else's opinion on you is both valid, acceptable, and not really your business. If someone isn't going to say something to your face, it isn't worth the drama.
The only time it is your business is if it will have real, tangible damages to your reputation or wellbeing. Becky thinking you're a mega cunt isn't worth confronting her or wasting your time thinking about.
There is literally no benefit to dwelling on or chasing after people talking about you. It will only cause drama and misery.
One piece of advice I once ignored but later realized was crucial was to prioritize self-care. I used to think it was just a trendy term and didn't pay much attention to it. Eventually, I realized that taking time for myself, getting enough rest, and managing stress were essential for my overall well-being and productivity. It made a huge difference in my life once I started to take it seriously.
Alot of counselors wanted me to change my thoughts. It was so overwhelming and I fought it for years. I realized I could do it my own way and find what works for me. I focused on changing a few thoughts at a time and instead of focusing on all the negative thoughts at once. It's not as overwhelming and it really has improved my life. I don't give so much energy to all the thoughts now. Just the ones that are taking up the most space in my mind. How we speak to ourselves truly does matter and can get us out of the spiral. Negative thoughts only make things harder
Let go of the things that no longer serve you.
This was in context to behaviors that were trauma responses from a time in my life where I was in a very difficult place financially. It’s always a work in progress, but I also apply it to relationships and not just things.
It's okay to not want to have sex. It doesn't make you less of a man. And having perfunctory sex to fill some self imposed "quota" will never make you happy.
Intimacy and sex are not the same thing. The venn diagram overlaps, but it isn't a circle.
Anyone who coerces you- either into doing something you don't want to do, or tolerating the absence of something you need, is a *bad match*. Regardless of what else they offer. Big Tiddy Goth GF won't let you cry in front of her? Bad match, no matter *how* Big Tiddy Goth she is.
• It’s okay to be selfish sometimes.
• if you don’t like every person you meet, don’t expect every person to like you.
• Just saying “Okay” instead of “it’s okay”.
“Poor planning on your part does not equal an emergency on my part” good one for the people pleasers, it’s not our job to save everyone. Sort of goes with the setting boundaries advice mentioned before.
Don’t be a people-pleaser.
Stressing the fuck out because I’ve said yes to too many people and never prioritized the people who deserve it most or myself. The best way to value your time is to just tell some people “no.”
Put $20 a week in a high interest account from 18 to 30 to enjoy your retirement.
Times have changed, but the concept remains & of I'd done that I'd be sittin' pretty. 20 bucks a week felt like a lot when I only earned $80 a week in the early 90s, but it wasn't lol. I could have set myself up. Alas, I thought the money fairy would take care of it.
Realizing I will never be recovered. Of course I ignored it first time hearing it. It attacked my ego and my hope at the same time and I was just a 16 year old kid. I had the whole life ahead of me. But it came from trauma specialized experts. They simply had more experience in my case and my disorder than I hąd and I didn't understand that until I had tried to get my life together for 17+ years. In fact my coping skills that I saw as a health sign was actually trauma reactions and they made me *worse*. I had no idea how complex it was and I just thought I could beat it by being positive and work hard. So incredibly naive. It took time to accept the truth but once I did. My recovery could finally rest.
Exercise and proper nutrition. I grew up with a diet fad loving mother who was also naturally tall and thin so I was what is now known as “skinny fat” until I started paying attention to what my body needed in my mid 20s.
I’m really grateful for listening to myself now, 20 years later.
And water.
And respecting my time and setting boundaries. I was taught to basically please others to elevate myself. That’s literally the opposite way to elevate yourself or self worth.
My dad always told me growing up “Freedoms just another word for nothing left to lose”. Took me a long time to understand the meaning behind it but its something I think about a lot now as an adult when I get too immersed in the day to day.
That people may not like you, but often it’s a reflection of them. Don’t lose yourself trying to make everyone happy and fixing everyone’s problems around you. ♥️
Getting enough sleep! I ignored my grandmother's lectures, then found out that for me, good sleep is the difference between being okay and being crazy.
Vaseline under and around the nose for allergies. I used to watch my mom smear that crap all around her nostrils and be disgusted. I do it frequently in allergy season as well as cold season.
Respect your energy. Sometimes or alot of times, you have to cut out those closest to you for you to experience exponential growth. Everything’s energy, and if someone or something is messing with your mind, cut your losses.
…*do ONE THING, everyday, that scares you*…….. https://youtu.be/sTJ7AzBIJoI?si=tHWGpJ3vGDG-6vmS
Not like jumping off a building or anything….. unless B.A.S.E. is your thing lol
Use it or loose it.
I enjoyed my electric recliner after retiring too much. It was painful to regain mobility and function after being “comfortable “ too much.
When I was 20 an older lady complimented me on my figure and told me not to gain weight. Her exact advice was "if you gain a pound, lose it."
Maybe I didn't need to be that extreme, but 45 lbs later, I wish I had listened a little bit.
Choose happiness. I know its cringe, especially if you have trauma and/or depression. It took me til I was hospitalized for suicidal ideation that I full understood what was meant by "choosing happiness." It takes a lot of work, I'm still working on it - It doesn't happen in the snap of a finger. But I'd rather strive for peace and happiness than wallow in sadness.
"Life goes by quick"
Spent my late teens, all my 20s and early 30s being aimless. Really regret not planning out my life and regret just sitting around "trying to figure things out" and not actually DOING things.
You can live without him.
I was once at such a dark low place in my life that my purpose was literally for someone else. I was only living for someone else who didn’t even love me or value me. I didn’t even value me.
When I left. I realize I should have left so much sooner. Because I could in fact live without him.
Someone said it, but it’s so important it’s worth repeating in as many comments as poss, but BOUNDARIES. Seriously. Also, burn every fucking bridge you need to to get away from people who disturb your peace. It’s 2024, fuck tradition, fuck family pressure, live your one and only life how YOU see fit.
Stop saying yes to everything at work. Eventually they will burn you out because your sanity is not their priory. Set yourself up right away as someone who does *just enough* to get by.
Boundaries. Sounded dumb and I didn’t think I didn’t need them. Turns out they’re needed in every area of life: even my own personal boundaries with myself.
So true! I had to learn it the hard way
What are some of your boundaries with yourself? Just curious
Showing up for myself. If I tell myself I’m going to go to the gym and h to alarm goes off and I feel tired I’m getting my ass out of bed. If I tell myself today I’m going to put stuff away and not down the dish is going where it needs to. I have cut people out of my life and at work I am allowed to ask questions or say no, respectfully
I really like these. Thank you for sharing :)
The second part is so true lol
lol right? You show up to work everyday, you can show up for yourself daily too.
Yes, just exercised it today. Hosted my friends for the night over. But this morning one wanted to stay for lunch and I politely told him to fuck off. I need my time to regenerate my energy.
gatekeeping is holy
It took me an embarrassing length of time to learn what was meant when people use the term in a social context. Not that I didn't understand some things are or are not okay. Just that I thought people meant actual physical boundaries.
Oh my gosh boundaries are needed in every area in life. Especially family and those closest to us
Couldn't agree more with this one man.
_Respect your time. If you don't, others surely won't._ Particularly essential for balancing work and life.
“You teach people how to treat you by what you allow, what you stop, and what you reinforce.”
"Save your money. You might need it one day." I used to be shit with money, I'd just blow it. Now I'm frugal as I can be, and i take pride in spending as little as possible. I'm not trying to impress anyone, I'm just out here trying to survive.
“You really sure you want to marry her? Because it’s okay to cancel the wedding..” I wasn’t sure and I didn’t want to cancel the wedding and let people down.
Damn, this happened to me too.
It happened its ok. You can focus on now not then
Laughed at the meme of someone wanting to take a "mental health day" from work some years back. I thought the idea of mental health was considered weak and I was kind of a workaholic. Now I take it seriously.
Having a routine.
Protect your hearing! Wearing hearing protection is 1,000x less dorky than *constantly* having to ask people to repeat themselves because you can't hear shit when you're 40. I work with two guys in their 70's who always tease me because my hearing is so much worse than theirs.
i go to a lot of concerts and i bring a bag of foam earplugs to pass out because so many people forget or don’t bother to bring them ://
That's really kind of you!
they’re super cheap and i don’t want the homies to get tinnitus 😅🙏🙏
*WHAT?!*
Do what makes you happy, not what you think you're supposed to do.
This one is a slippery slope. What if meth makes you happy. What if overeating makes you happy?
Meth and overeating do make me happy.
Eat good, train, socialise. Three big points to Still feel good around 30.
This goes waaay further than your 30s, it's a lifelong piece of advice 👍
This … and I add get good sleep.
Facts
Never get back together with someone after you broke up the first time. You will break up the second time for the same reasons.
When they show their true colors, believe them the first time
what about the third time… or fourth… 😅
I don’t know. My parents broke up for a summer in high school but they’re going on like 36 years married now. Proud of em.
AGREEE. But ffs when will I learn this! 😭
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Sorry to hear that man’s and I hope you find d a reason to keep your head up but- Walking doesn’t cure depression or make friends. They’re just saying walking is good for you. If you’re depressed/don’t have friends/want to die for non fitness related reasons then fitness probably isn’t going to solve those things
Process your trauma, nothing helps depression except finding why your body is shutting down. I say this as somebody who has been depressed for two decades, depression is a natural state that happens when we don’t see a way out because our body memories are clogged. Body memories = repressed emotions.
Walking is like tutorial level fitness man, you gotta do more.
Let things go. The best advice but so hard for me to follow.
Save ten percent every time you get paid. Wish I listened bc I’m financially suffering for sure.
Warmup before exercising. Work on mobility and stability. Take care of your joints and your body. Inflammation in your joints and tendons and muscle issues as a young person really reduce what you're able to do as a young adult.
Sunscreen daily - I didn’t ignore, just wasn’t as diligent as I should’ve been.
Maintenance is always easier than fixing something. Eating well, working out, and minimal drug/alcohol use is important. Finally got myself back in a good place at 33 but holy shit was my body a mess at 30.
Congrats!! I did the same, it takes some hard work. So worth it.
Something about how little people actually think about you at the end of the day. So it’s not worth stressing over. Hella paraphrasing haha
Don’t depend on other people for your happiness
Saying no to people and cutting out people who treat me bad. Sometimes people don't deserve respect.
Amen
So, everyone must walk on eggshells around you and bow down to your every whim? Sounds like you might have a problem
I don’t think he’s making broad sweeping statements. context is surely involved.
Don't believe you can change people and don't change who you are to please someone.
Buy stocks
Get exercise every day.
With every action there’s a reaction . Not matter what it is .
Diet and exercise is good for you
You don’t have to be good at something to enjoy it.
Sleep. When I was in my 20ties I could function quite well with less than 6h a day. Now I am nearing my 40ties and need at least 6, preferably 8. I needed more when I trained hard or drunk alcohol. So I gave up alcohol. This is my second advice - don’t drink.
Drink more water
Not making your own life the center of your world to live directly through first. Also like another person mentioned boundaries to protect this. If you can't help yourself or be your true self first then you definitely can't do that sustainably when you're involved with others. No one can live your life for you, and how you treat others is not necessarily a reflection of how good they are, but a reflection of your own capability and this relationship you have with yourself in the world. >- "Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one." - Eleanor Roosevelt
You’re not selfish. You’re self preserving.
Money IS important. Spent too much of my life excusing shitty behaviour and shitty people because I convinced myself money is material and shallow.
Would you elaborate on the second sentence? Curious to hear more about this
The biggest - got myself into a relationship in which I essentially gave my partner all my earnings, took out cards and loans for him, borrowed from friends and sold valuables to basically pay 100% for our living expenses and him AND for his shitty irresponsible behaviours on the premise of ‘he loves me’, ‘I’m glad I can help him during his hard (and coincidentally never ending) times’ and ‘money isn’t important, love is’. He had a poor-ish upbringing, and his father passed away in a very sudden and traumatic plane accident, and so I excused a lot of what he did because of that. Took me years of lost peace and living like crap to realise this ain’t right. Sad thing was I’m very entrepreneur-minded and been working since I was 14. If he hadn’t done me dirty like that I’d be in a comfortable position right now. But I’m still financially recovering from all that.
Oh wow, thank you for taking the time to explain. What made you finally realise and/or decide to take action?
I always had a sinking feeling that this was wrong, but I convinced myself he would change. I held onto that hope for embarrassingly long. And with time, he kept acting even more entitled to my money, and showing less and less regard for my ‘kindness’ (which was actually a lack of boundaries). I guess as you get older, you fall out of that rose tinted ‘all you need is love’ mentality. Eventually I came to understand what he was doing was straight up financial abuse of the worst kind. I doubt I’ll ever see all the money I lost because of him. But he taught me harsh lessons about time, money and abuse.
Thank you for sharing your story today. It really resonated with me.
Always follow your gut feeling.
If it was said about you, but not to you, it is not your business. I know, everyone wants to know if someone is gossiping about them, but someone else's opinion on you is both valid, acceptable, and not really your business. If someone isn't going to say something to your face, it isn't worth the drama. The only time it is your business is if it will have real, tangible damages to your reputation or wellbeing. Becky thinking you're a mega cunt isn't worth confronting her or wasting your time thinking about. There is literally no benefit to dwelling on or chasing after people talking about you. It will only cause drama and misery.
What you do now will catch up to you unexpectedly
as zac brown band once said; "save your strength for things that you can change, forget the ones you can't. you gotta let it go."
Your Workplace are not your family that accepts you unconditionally with your mistakes.Just do your Job better,Get that Money and Go home.
Get up early in the morning and sleep soon at night.
Sunscreen
Don't do cocaine.
One piece of advice I once ignored but later realized was crucial was to prioritize self-care. I used to think it was just a trendy term and didn't pay much attention to it. Eventually, I realized that taking time for myself, getting enough rest, and managing stress were essential for my overall well-being and productivity. It made a huge difference in my life once I started to take it seriously.
My mom told me not to get married before 25 because my prefrontal cortex wouldnt be developed enough. She was right.
You can't outrun a bad diet. At least not for long.
Brushing teeth twice a day - at minimum.
Alot of counselors wanted me to change my thoughts. It was so overwhelming and I fought it for years. I realized I could do it my own way and find what works for me. I focused on changing a few thoughts at a time and instead of focusing on all the negative thoughts at once. It's not as overwhelming and it really has improved my life. I don't give so much energy to all the thoughts now. Just the ones that are taking up the most space in my mind. How we speak to ourselves truly does matter and can get us out of the spiral. Negative thoughts only make things harder
Don’t sweat the small stuff.
arch support becomes increasingly important as you age
Drink water. Its important
Eating protein
Let go of the things that no longer serve you. This was in context to behaviors that were trauma responses from a time in my life where I was in a very difficult place financially. It’s always a work in progress, but I also apply it to relationships and not just things.
You will get more work done if you take breaks than if you try to work all the time.
Sit up straight. Wish I had focused on my posture more.
Fuckin flossing....
It's okay to not want to have sex. It doesn't make you less of a man. And having perfunctory sex to fill some self imposed "quota" will never make you happy. Intimacy and sex are not the same thing. The venn diagram overlaps, but it isn't a circle. Anyone who coerces you- either into doing something you don't want to do, or tolerating the absence of something you need, is a *bad match*. Regardless of what else they offer. Big Tiddy Goth GF won't let you cry in front of her? Bad match, no matter *how* Big Tiddy Goth she is.
Don't take friends or loved ones for granted. They won't always be around.
• It’s okay to be selfish sometimes. • if you don’t like every person you meet, don’t expect every person to like you. • Just saying “Okay” instead of “it’s okay”.
“Poor planning on your part does not equal an emergency on my part” good one for the people pleasers, it’s not our job to save everyone. Sort of goes with the setting boundaries advice mentioned before.
Don’t be a people-pleaser. Stressing the fuck out because I’ve said yes to too many people and never prioritized the people who deserve it most or myself. The best way to value your time is to just tell some people “no.”
You are always on camera. You can’t change how you feel, but you can change how you react.
Save money
Stop trying to control what you have no control over including other peoples opinions.
Silence is most powerful.
Put $20 a week in a high interest account from 18 to 30 to enjoy your retirement. Times have changed, but the concept remains & of I'd done that I'd be sittin' pretty. 20 bucks a week felt like a lot when I only earned $80 a week in the early 90s, but it wasn't lol. I could have set myself up. Alas, I thought the money fairy would take care of it.
Don’t get married
Don't sleep with any man you wouldn't want to have baby with.
High-yield savings accounts
Realizing I will never be recovered. Of course I ignored it first time hearing it. It attacked my ego and my hope at the same time and I was just a 16 year old kid. I had the whole life ahead of me. But it came from trauma specialized experts. They simply had more experience in my case and my disorder than I hąd and I didn't understand that until I had tried to get my life together for 17+ years. In fact my coping skills that I saw as a health sign was actually trauma reactions and they made me *worse*. I had no idea how complex it was and I just thought I could beat it by being positive and work hard. So incredibly naive. It took time to accept the truth but once I did. My recovery could finally rest.
Exercise and proper nutrition. I grew up with a diet fad loving mother who was also naturally tall and thin so I was what is now known as “skinny fat” until I started paying attention to what my body needed in my mid 20s. I’m really grateful for listening to myself now, 20 years later. And water. And respecting my time and setting boundaries. I was taught to basically please others to elevate myself. That’s literally the opposite way to elevate yourself or self worth.
Get good sleep, proper nutrition and exercise to manage your stress. Apparently it wasn’t insomnia, wine and junk food.🙄
My dad always told me growing up “Freedoms just another word for nothing left to lose”. Took me a long time to understand the meaning behind it but its something I think about a lot now as an adult when I get too immersed in the day to day.
Drink water. And don’t assume you will find a romantic partner just because people say so.
Don’t go cheap on shoes.
In life, wherever you aim yourself, you tend to land nearby. Best to aim high.
Be yourself.
Walk away from a fight. You should only fight if you have no other choice, and you usually have plenty of choices to walk away from a fight.
Take care of your health and your college major really does matter. No one wants to be stuck at a job they’re not suited for.
That people may not like you, but often it’s a reflection of them. Don’t lose yourself trying to make everyone happy and fixing everyone’s problems around you. ♥️
Don't take life so seriously
Use protection
The world is cold and I need to wake up and smell the coffee
Watch out where the huskies go....... Frank Zappa.
And don’t you eat that yellow snow!
‘Talk to your therapist about your feelings for me.’
Getting enough sleep! I ignored my grandmother's lectures, then found out that for me, good sleep is the difference between being okay and being crazy.
Vaseline under and around the nose for allergies. I used to watch my mom smear that crap all around her nostrils and be disgusted. I do it frequently in allergy season as well as cold season.
Save money
Every time I was warned about a guy being sketchy.
Sleep
Learn how to say "no" when someone at work asks you to do something extra
Save money for your future self—starting NOW.
Don't do anything that will limit your opportunities.
Eating healthy
To trust myself.
Do not go near him.
Don’t chase women .
Cut the sugar. I had gestational diabetes and it was so hard. Should have practiced a bit before I had to suddenly cut it all out.
Get regular exercise. I feel much better if I do.
Not to become a teacher - it was my dream so I ignored everyone and did it anyways. It destroyed my mental health and finances
Don’t be afraid to take risk.
Get more calcium into your system. Of course, I only realized how crucial it is once it was too late.
Respect your energy. Sometimes or alot of times, you have to cut out those closest to you for you to experience exponential growth. Everything’s energy, and if someone or something is messing with your mind, cut your losses.
"You have ADHD "
Work harder in high school
Drink water
Are you a bot?
To stretch every day
…*do ONE THING, everyday, that scares you*…….. https://youtu.be/sTJ7AzBIJoI?si=tHWGpJ3vGDG-6vmS Not like jumping off a building or anything….. unless B.A.S.E. is your thing lol
Putting myself first
Everything.
Praying helps, regardless of who it's directed at
"Don't marry that guy." *proceeded to marry him, cue 7 years of trauma all wrapped up in a bow for me and my therapist to open and go through*
Get a good chair if you do sit in it a lot. Lower back support, arm support, head support, the works. You back will thank you.
Use it or loose it. I enjoyed my electric recliner after retiring too much. It was painful to regain mobility and function after being “comfortable “ too much.
Tattoos. Now I have to cover them up in 95 degrees. Brutal.
When I was 20 an older lady complimented me on my figure and told me not to gain weight. Her exact advice was "if you gain a pound, lose it." Maybe I didn't need to be that extreme, but 45 lbs later, I wish I had listened a little bit.
Slow down. Theres no rush.
“The more you like a girl, it will hurt equally if she ends it.” I didn’t prepare for that
Choose happiness. I know its cringe, especially if you have trauma and/or depression. It took me til I was hospitalized for suicidal ideation that I full understood what was meant by "choosing happiness." It takes a lot of work, I'm still working on it - It doesn't happen in the snap of a finger. But I'd rather strive for peace and happiness than wallow in sadness.
"Life goes by quick" Spent my late teens, all my 20s and early 30s being aimless. Really regret not planning out my life and regret just sitting around "trying to figure things out" and not actually DOING things.
Don’t marry the first girl to show interest to you in your 20s.
Don't asks questions for which you do not want to know the answers
You can live without him. I was once at such a dark low place in my life that my purpose was literally for someone else. I was only living for someone else who didn’t even love me or value me. I didn’t even value me. When I left. I realize I should have left so much sooner. Because I could in fact live without him.
It’s more about using your ears then it is to open your mouth people need to listen more and speak less
Make your bed and floss your teeth each day. Changes much.
Few care for you like you do.
Someone said it, but it’s so important it’s worth repeating in as many comments as poss, but BOUNDARIES. Seriously. Also, burn every fucking bridge you need to to get away from people who disturb your peace. It’s 2024, fuck tradition, fuck family pressure, live your one and only life how YOU see fit.
You can't fix people.
Stop saying yes to everything at work. Eventually they will burn you out because your sanity is not their priory. Set yourself up right away as someone who does *just enough* to get by.
“If you shake it more than twice, you’re playing with it.”
"Your parents want you to die. Avoid them". Saved my life, literally.
Ignore the poor