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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> Am I the asshole for not allowing my boyfriend to use my car even though I said he could and then taking the keys with me to work to make sure he couldn’t use the car
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*Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
NTA. First I am sorry for your lose. Your boyfriend is a sneaky insensitive asshole. He didn‘t ask to borrow the Ferrari. He asked to borrow your car because his was conveniently scheduled for maintenance and your car was bigger. He was deliberately vague. He was lying about his car being scheduled for maintenance and saying your car was bigger lead you to believe that he meant the Land Rover. He already told his friends that he was driving the Ferrari before he even asked you.
You have being dating this user loser for 6 months and he thinks he is entitled to drive your dad’s car? Not even any car but a Ferrari. Then he runs to mommy and daddy who have the nerve to tell you that you need therapy and you that you dad is gone and you need to stop being possessive of your fathers things? They are all disgusting!
But to answer your question you didn't go too far. He’s doesn’t care about you. I’m glad you got your key back and I hope this means you dumped his sorry ass. Block him and his parents. You deserve better. You are grieving and the last thing you need is this parasite trying to take advantage of you during this difficult time.
Not to mention that he went back when she was out, and searched the apartment thoroughly enough that he knows she took all the car keys with him. I'm 99% sure that if she'd left the Ferrari keys at home he would have taken the Ferrari anyway.
NTA. Security took the spare key off him. Sneaking AF. Is he even insured to drive it cos I bet he would have been driving around showing off in it.
Dump this loser asap.
I'm wondering if he purposely "scheduled" maintenance on the day he had to pick them up (IF he even actually had it done) as well as purposely not mentioning the exact car. He's probably driven the Land Rover before so not being specific about which car he wanted to use was calculating.
Wait....exactly how many people did he have to pick up? Maybe I missed something....
ETA- OP said he had to pick up friends. Exactly how many were going to fit into a Ferrari? Something isn't adding up.🤔
Like how is a 2 seater Ferrari able to pick up "friends" plural... when the rover probably has 5/6seats plus luggage. hopefully she is clear of the this piece of work. also Insurance, if he wasnt on it. I wouldnt of gave him the car anyways. something happens. thats on OP
I would have told him tough cookie, no one drives my cars and they are just a Chevy and a Caddy. It’s called get your friends a large Uber if your car is being worked on.
Yep, never loan something out that you can not afford to give away. It has been a rule for me for a long time, and it saves relationships worth keeping and shows you some that aren't.
Exactly, this is a 2 seat car and she keeps saying picking up “friends” plural. The “trunk” is also tiny. Like 2 helmets is all that will fit tiny.
How would that have worked? This all seems very suspect…
To me, the "yours is bigger" was a set up meaning, he implied that, KNOWING he was referring to the Land Rover but actually wanted the Ferrari. This was piled on in anticipation of OP saying yes...knowing he was going to try the ol' switcheroo at the last minute. Also, his parent's putting themselves into something that was between them is suspect and for something so trivial makes me think they're used to meddling. I'd rethink everything about this manipulative man and his meddling family.
As a mom it makes me wonder exactly what he is telling his parents because if one of my older sons whined to me that their girlfriend wouldn’t lend them her Ferrari I’d laugh and say “good I wouldn’t let you breathe on a Ferrari that I owned”. He’s probably telling them bits of truth that are covered in bullshit frosting to make her seem like the “bad guy”.
My mom bought a Porsche when I was 16 and made it clear I wasn't ever going to drive it. One of my friends asked if he could and she laughed in his face. 12 years and 3 totaled beaters later the closest I've gotten to driving it is handing her the keys. If I complained that a girlfriend wouldn't let me drive her Ferrari she'd probably throw something at me.
She had already promised he could use the Ferrari and now she is alienating him from his very close friend(s)!
Unless they both drive it all of the time it really doesn't make sense to use it to go pick up multiple people with luggage, that just can't work and doing it to look rich isn't cool when it isn't even yours. It'd be silly if he *did* own it, that car cannot possibly be large enough for "friends."
I don’t think he was ever going to mention which car, I think he was just going to grab that set of keys. He came back to the apartment and just happened to notice she took all of the keys. Not that she moved them or that they aren’t in the key dish… she took them, so he obviously went looking… I doubt he was going to talk to her about anything as he knew she had work, I’m betting he waited till he knew she was gone and was just going to scoop the keys and be back before school
Let out like Ferris bueler
Very small two bucket seats, no trunk and no real backseat. That’s only going from my experience which has included riding in three, owning zero. But I’ve never known them to have a trunk or backseat big enough for more than two bags of groceries and a days worth of mail.
It's probably not even scheduled for maintenance. I doubt most people's significant others ask for appointment confirmation receipts. Plus, car maintenance appointments you can even grab with barely a days notice. There is no way in hell you can't push a car maintenance appointment to before or after the picking up friends from the airport. The entire thing was probably a lie to go, joy riding in a Ferrari, and sounds like the exact scenario where someone may get reckless having fun and wreck it
Even worse, let their "friend" drive it. There is also no guarantee the friend was a guy or even coming from an airport, if he may as well be trying to impress another woman. We have heard stories about people cheating in their spouses bed, this is not a stretch.
I read the post again. It seems the boyfriend let everybody know they were driving a Ferrari. Except the OWNER of the Ferrari. Stevie Wonder even saw this coming!
Lol thanks a have a PHD in “smartassery”. Lol. And I’ve also been married twice and I have four children, needless to say I’m not afraid of anything, and can make almost any situation have an element of humor,,,without that skill I would have done myself in decades ago. Lol.
He drives a matchbox version of her Ferrari. He even makes the car sounds when he pushes it around. 28:1 scale. Lmao. NTA, OP. And his parents are ripping you? #1, butt lout. #2, involving themselves in a 6 month old BF/GF relationship? The fam is cuckoo.
His car was never going into the shop for repairs, that was a lie.
He was able to drive his vehicle to her appt, use her key to break into her appt. With the intention of stealing her car. He Searched the appt so thoroughly he knew she took the keys with her.
Dude has lied to her a dozen times just over this one thing alone.
He has probably been lying to her constantly.
How small is this guy's car if a ferrari is the bigger vehicle? Unless he drives a hotwheels car he obviously meant the landrover...
The fact that his parents called her means he was really up to something stupid!
He really told on himself with the “I can’t believe you took all the keys” thing. Why would you know that all the keys were gone unless you went back after OP left to look for the keys?
>He definitely didn't go back to her apartment to "talk things over" he went back to try to steal her car.
I guess he wanted to talk to the air, since she wasn't even home.
This dude would have left op on the hook for over 30k in damages minimum. They tire would be bald brakes and calipers likley worn out and axtensive damage to the paint from concrete and asphalt and possible frame dmg. A paint job may be 15k dude wanted a antique ferrari to joyride in. This is a car manufactured in 1988 is officially an antique car replacing parts and finding the original paint for the body would be extremely expensive and very difficult.
Nah man this is why luxury car rental place have so many hoops to jump through because in the past people rented out high end muscle cars or lamborghinis porsche or ferrari and got the cars back with tire bald brakes worn out calipers busted paint scratched or chipped ops boyfriend is one of these types. This exact situation is why luxury car rental services deny rentals if they believe people are going to go on wreckless joyriding sprees
And that would have been grand theft auto. He would have been arrested and spent time in jail and with how insistent he was on showing it off to his friends probably would have crashed it. Together 6 months and thinks he's entitled to her stuff especially after her dad just died. Ridiculous. Definitely needs to dump him which it's reading like she did.
And then said she didn't trust him and she was crazy for that.... but you did exactly what she believed you would do and you got caught. The gaslighting is real
im 100% sure that was the real reason he went back. He had no intention of talking things out, he knew she left for work and figured he could sneak out the ferrarri keys and still have his joyride. OP needs to dump this loser.
I also hate the idea of someone showing off something that has absolutely nothing to do with them! He didn’t inherit a Ferrari! He didn’t work to buy a Ferrari! He didn’t have a genie grant him the wish of a Ferrari!! He wanted to borrow a Ferrari from his gf to show off to his buddies. How is that showing off anything except he chose well when looking for a gf?
The last poster was dead on about how he was shady about the whole deal! He straight lied about wanting a bigger vehicle to get his buddies!!
Then this dude does something so childish I can’t even believe I have to address it!! He calls mommy and daddy to cry on their shoulders because his big bad gf won’t let him drive the grown up car! Are you fucking kidding me?!?! What’s worse is that the parents actually have the gall to call the OP and lecture her about it!! OMG! No we see why the bf is such a child…because he’s still being breastfed!
No, you didn’t overreact in any way! I would consider keeping his picture with security and keeping the prohibition on him entering!! He’s a child in a man’s body and you are NTA!!!!
Oh so much this!! Does he have an ounce of self esteem that he's going to show off dead FIL's car to his friends as if it's some achievement? What idiot friends would they be if they didn't ask how the daughter of a W got with such an L.
There are far too many videos on r/idiotsincars of people who don't know how to drive high performance cars crashing Ferraris, Lambos, Corvettes, etc.
OP's BF + 'friends' = potential disaster
Was going to say pretty much the same but you've completely nailed it. To get his parents on the OP's case though , WTAF?
Edit: AND her father is recently deceased (sincere sympathies OP) and they think she is too attached to his possessions? My blood is boiling at the conduct of these people as I lost my Dad 5 years ago and still get teary moments.
Dump him sweetheart, he is appalling and you sure don't want to marry into that family.
I guard my Dad's guitars with my life. He passed 12 years ago. His music sheets, and his military awards too. His college writing binder? I read the stories to my kids. He was an awesome writer, wonderful way with words. For a while after he passed, you couldn't pry those guitars more than a few feet from me if I didn't have to go to work or something not guitar friendly, lol. I'm less twitchy about them now, but they're still my most precious treasures.
This is a very spot on assessment. Unreservedly NTA. But your boyfriend (should become an ex) certainly is a major one.
I would never even dream of asking anyone to borrow a Ferrari.
Dump him. He can't win so he gets mommy and daddy involved. He has a spine the consistency of cooked spaghetti. Mommy and daddy would always come first.
Not mommy and daddy. Only himself. Only mom and dad as a means to put himself first. He sounds like the type of guy who would trick mom into signing the house over to him, then selling it, and kicking her onto the street.
NTA
> I asked him why he couldn’t use his car and he said that his is booked in for maintenance that day and mine was bigger anyway.
>
>The Ferrari is a 328
I'll confess to knowing nothing about cars but google tells me that the Ferrari is tiny. So he lied to you. Plus it doesn't look like the kind of vehicle that is suitable for an airport pickup. Let alone for multiple people. He just wanted to flex to his friends with your car.
He went back to yours and tried to find the keys after you had left for work? Then bitched about it to his folks?
None of this is a good sign. Don't doubt yourself on this. You did not go too far.
It sounds like a multi-headed toxic AH. (Because his parents raised him to be the AH).
I’m so sorry a group of people came at you to back their manipulative son and try and make you feel like you were the superficial person here. (“Having healthy boundaries” tends to be received as personal attacks if someone is unhealthy/toxic).
Good on you for taking the keys with you. That’s wild of him.
Exactly, a 328 is a classic mid engine two seater, and 'friends' was given as plural, so you ain't getting more than one in there, never mind anything bigger than a carry on
Old Ferraris aren't known for reliability, care needs to be taken when driving and if someone's borrowing it to show off to their mates, chances are that's not the case, and guarantee he wouldn't foot the bill should he break something, it's not the kind of thing you'd go to your local garage for
It's a terrible idea to let a random moron flog a mid engined car but on reliability, older Ferraris are known for running best when they are given the occasional "Italian tune-up" (also known as "hitting redline a few times"). They tend to work better if they're actually driven.
None of this changes the fact that OPs bf driving it is a terrible idea. More just a fun fact.
I’ve been picked up by a friend in a Shelby cobra unknowingly
I had to hold my luggage in my lap on the freeway and couldn’t see in front of me.
It was incredibly impractical but my friend though it was funny
He ex is an idiot
When I came home from the military, I had my dad pick me up from the airport because my parents had a full size pickup truck and a minivan, so there would be plenty of room for my luggage and my friend from the military also needed a lift home.
So I was absolutely pissed off when my dad showed up in MY car, which was a 90s Honda civic 2 door hatchback that didn't even have AC, and he brought my older sister along too.
I was like, what were you thinking? How are we supposed to fit 12 pieces of luggage in my tiny ass car in addition to a 4th person that I didn't agree to pick me up.
He said that he thought I might like to see my car since i had been gone for 8 months and he didn't think I'd have that much luggage despite me telling him that I had a lot of luggage and to bring the minivan.
The hatch was completely full that you couldn't see out of it. Luggage was stacked to the ceiling of the back seat. Luggage was on the floor, on our laps, just everywhere.
So annoying.
He said he was picking up "friends", and the 328 is a 2-seat sports car.
Where are you going to put 3 adult men and luggage for 2 of them in a
Ferrari 328? Strap one man to the hood?
I'm kinda thinking that the Ferrari would have gone missing if OP had let him take it. I mean, his "friends" wouldn't have fit, he was so insistent that he went back to search for the keys to steal it, and his parents were way too invested in their son stealing the car. Parted out, they could have made bank; the steering wheel alone is worth ~$2500.
NTA
Your ex-boyfriend I hope...That boy does not deserve a relationship with you. He is way too focused on what he can get out of you.
Also, uncapable of seeing he is in the wrong and calling you selfish?! RED FLAGS !
Find yourself a man that can respect you and your things, that is open with his intentions, that isn't looking to take advantage of your position in society, that is loving towards you and puts you and your connection above his friends.
Take care!
That would be my next move. Just because they took back the spare key, who’s to say he hadn’t secretly made another at some point. Wouldn’t trust it based on the behavior he’s already displayed.
OP also needs to not be giving the next bf a key to her apartment before they've been together six months. She seems kind of naive, but at least she took the key and has him barred from entry. I guess that's a start. NTA but please value yourself enough to not tolerate men who only value you for what you can provide them.
*< he said that his is booked in for maintenance that day and mine* ***was bigger anyway****. >*
Totally implying he deeded the LandRover for the transportation.
*< He got pissed and said that his friends were expecting him to show up with a Ferrari and that they were excited about going for a drive in it.>*
He all planned it ahead, it wasn't even a mere airport pick up, they were going to take it for a spin.
**
How did he know you took all the keys. 'Cause he looked for them and couldn't find them!
**
He KNEW you were at work. He was just looking for the keys.
**
Because their son couldn't show of SOMEONE ELSE's car?
They all sound toxic and unhealthy to me.
Your father only past away two months ago! (I'm really sorry for your loss)
And you've only been with him for a mere 6 months!
*< I was so pissed about him going through my apartment, I called security and they took my spare key from him and have his picture up as a do not allow to enter. Did I go too far?>*
Nope you didn't. You forgot to mention him as an **EX,** which I hope for you he is now.
NTA
Agreed. And gosh, his parents are just terrible. They're trying to convince her that she's five and it's something as mundane as a toy that she needs to share.
And um, no. Like even if it wasn't emotionally precious because it was her late dad's car, it would still be *hers*. It would still be a very expensive item that she owned, and she has every right to make a judgement call on who she trusts to treat it well and bring it home in good condition.
And for the record, OP, top of the list of people who won't treat your car with respect are:
* people who try to trick you into letting them use your car,
* people who try to guilt trip you into letting them use it with "but I already told my friends we could",
* people who sneak into your house when they know you aren't home in order to steal your car keys and car when you've already said no,
* people who whinge to mummy and daddy that you won't let them play with your car,
* people who downplay how important and precious the car is, and try to convince you that your concerns are unreasonable.
Hit every single nail square on the head.
OP, he better be your ex-boyfriend, because he tried to steal your Ferrari and would have gaslit you into believing you'd promised him the Ferrari.
All of this. Dad died TWO MONTHS ago. There are people who do not go back to work that quickly after losing a parent.
NTA. Drop this loser and his crazy toxic parents
Also hopping on to ask, in what world is a Ferrari a bigger car? “Friends from the airport” implying multiple friends AND luggage, where is all that supposed to fit in a Ferrari??
NTA
Also, he def went back to the apartment to look for the keys, not to “talk it out” that’s shady shady behavior
NTA and I’d be done with this guy. His behavior and having his parents contact you is ridiculous.
Also, good thing you took all the car keys, he obviously went back to find them (or how else would he have known?)
NTA - and hopefully he’s your ex. He went back to your apartment to take the keys and drive the car anyways. On top of the fact that he’s gotten his parents involved? How old is this guy? 12?
So many red flags stitched together on him, you might as well put a white beard on him and call him Santa.
NTA at all. Your bf is an asshole. Please break up with him. He is lying about coming over to talk and wanted to steal the keys to your car when you were gone. You absolutely did the right thing by taking your keys and having security not let him in anymore.
His parents are also psycho for saying what they said to you. The whole family is disgusting you don’t need that in your life.
NTA
No you did not go too far. He tried to manipulate you into using a sentimental item that he knew you would not give direct permission to use. Then he entered your apartment to STEAL YOUR CAR KEYS. And got hos parents involved. Get him out of your life.
>his mum and dad telling me I need to go to therapy because I’m too attached to things
If his mummy and daddy believe their son deserves to drive a Ferrari, they should buy him one.
NTA - ditch the leech.
nope, good for you!
and block all the AHs that are telling you all of that nonsense - it's been 2 months and losing a parent is hard.
NTA
btw, is your bf maybe related to the dude from about a year ago that took his gf's Porsche to brag to his friends and ended up doing so much damage because he and his friend went and drove it in the FIELD?! 😂😂
NTA. He wants to show off to his friends which means he's going to drive fast because his friends want to. He wrecks it it's on you not him because it's in your name. Protect your assets and NEVER let anyone drive your cars who is not on your insurane or has their own money to cover damages, partner or not. I won't let my 22 year old daughter's boyfriend drive hers or my cars as long as they are under my name and insurace because of his road rage and not having a job and no motivation to get one. Dump the loser before you waste more of your life with this mess.
How many people can he fit in a Ferrari 328. Was he planning on picking them up one at a time and driving them home separately. He said 'Friends', plural. Pretty sure this car can only hold two people. based solely on my google search. i dont think it has a backseat.
And the way he asked was sneaky as hell. Why would OP think he meant the Ferrari when he said his own car wasnt roomy enough. Sure take the Land Rover, makes sense.
Also 6 months and bro thinks he get to drive the Ferrari. Her deceased fathers Ferrari. What a tool.
NTA and sounds like he is an ex now anyway
You know he snuck back into your home in order to steal your car, right?! It's utter bollocks that he wanted to discuss things further with you 🙄
Get rid of this parasite ASAP and change your locks just in case.
NTA
He obviously went back to your apartment to get the keys despite what you said, otherwise how did he know they were missing? And he went to his parents complaining about you, really?
This is someone who doesn’t respect your boundaries. There’s a lot of red flags waving about here
NTA
My uncle has a luxury car that was bought by his late wife. He’s a very practical guy, but he never sold the car after her passing. I can tell it means a lot to him.
I’d never even dream of asking permission to drive the car. I’d be scared to even drive it around in an emergency, much more just to show off to my friends. Your boyfriend should understand what things are sentimental to you even without saying.
NTA - in Scotland we would call your little boyfriend a “chancing prick”.
Tell him to GTF and go for a nice drive in your Ferrari where you’ll see lots of appreciative glances of people who appreciate beautiful cars, like your Dad did.
You can do better, toots!
NTA, I can’t believe his parents said those things on top of everything! I would be seriously reconsidering my relationship if I was in your position. I treasure everything left to me from special people in my life- I put equal importance on everything, whether it’s small gifts I gave them when they were alive to expensive items left to me in their will. I’m sorry for your loss, don’t let anyone guilt you as you are well within your rights
You didn't go far enough to be honest. .. well, right up until you had security remove him and take away his access key.. THAT was far enough .
You don't need a user in your life.
NTA this guys sounds like he’s using you. It not that your attachment to material things is unreasonable it’s that the car belonged to your father. And on top of that it has only been about 8 weeks 60 days-ish. That’s so insensitive for someone who you have trusted into your home and life. You deserve better. Your father would have wanted someone better for you.
The parental backup alone would be thge last straw for me.
What's next, they come kocking down my door because "you can't make my diddykins wash his own laundry, I demand that you stop!"
NTA Knowing you were at work, he went back to your apartment ostensibly to 'talk things out'. And as long as he was there, in the empty apartment, he just happened to notice that the keys to the cars were gone...... Especially the keys to an expensive car that was not his that he told his friends he was picking them up in WITHOUT asking you, the owner, first.
This guy was prioritizing his friends over you, and he was willing to sneak and lie to get his way.
And then he called in his mommy and daddy and sicced them on your case.
Wow. Just 'Wow'.
Please tell me you don't see yourself married to someone who acts like this.
NTA. Your hopefully now EX-boyfriend is, at the very least, inconsiderate and immature. This was a vehicle you inherited from your dad who has not been gone long at all. He gets his parents to text you (WTF?). He only went back to your apartment to sneak the car keys, so you did the right thing in having security remove them from him. He's probably the type of clown who would drive that car without permission and cause an accident by showing off for his friends.
He never wanted to drive the Land Rover, he wanted the Ferrari all along because, to him, it is compensation for his penis, which you should never avail yourself of again.
NTA! you totally did the right thing and i do hope he becomes your ex soon because there are so many red flags to count is unbelievable. and his parents are pieces of work too telling you to go to therapy and being possessive of things when you dad is gone. rid the bf and parents because it sounds like a family of grifters trying to pull things over on you
NTA, he needed a car to pick people up & you agreed that he can use the appropriate car.
Your boyfriend wanted to show off by pretending that the Ferrari was his. & he knows that what he did was wrong, otherwise he'd have specifically asked to borrow the Ferrari from the outset.
I suggest you ditch the boyfriend.
There's something suspect about this post. A Ferrari 328 is very definitely a 2 seat car. There's no way the BF is picking "friends" up from the airport unless he is planning multiple trips.
I need more information on exactly what the BF was planning, because right now the story doesn't add up.
https://www.gallery-aaldering.com/wp-content/uploads/gallery/30155110/30155110-3.jpg
I doubt the airport was real. He just needed a sensible sounding reason to borrow a car. He didn't define which car. Then meet up at a car park and play donuts for a while.
Came looking for someone questioning this whole thing. I call fake as long as op answers 0 comments and the multiple plural "friends" isn't explained somehow lol
NTA- I feel for you. I’m sorry for the loss of your dad firsthand, that’s shocking behaviour from your boyfriend of 6 months. He has no right to your dad’s car, that’s yours alone. Take all the time you need. If he cared enough for you he would appreciate such a beautiful gift from your dad.
I am sorry for your loss. And I am so proud of you for setting boundaries and sticking to them.
💯NTA. Do not second guess yourself for even 1 more minute!!
NTA.
Not even a little bit. He lied to you about why he wanted your car (I doubt his car is smaller than a Ferrari) and then went to complain to his Mum & Dad.
NTA. You reacted exactly the right amount. Your bf and his family clearly just want to benefit off of you and have no respect for you, your belongings, your recent loss, or your boundaries. Definitely end the relationship and continue to make sure he cannot gain access to you, your apartment, or your cars.
NTA
He deliberately mislead you. He's shown you he's a liar and a manipulator who cannot be trusted.
He's shown that he values showing off to his friends above your trust.
He's shown that he doesn't respect you or what you say (going into your apartment after you kicked him out of it)
You'd be a fool to trust him again,
Believe him when he shows you who he is and what he values, and remember that no matter what he says going forward, he's shown that it's not you.
NTA.
His parents saying you’re “too attached to things” means that they were prepared to say the same thing when he wrecked the car. Which he was probably not exactly planning, but would happen accidentally, and would be your fault anyway for a) having such a nice car and b) lending it to him. Since option b was off the table *he tried to steal your car*.
He tried to steal your car. That’s how much your boyfriend respects you. He tried to “trick” you and when that failed he just straight up tried to steal from you. And when he wrecked it, he would have still blamed you.
NTA, he was being sneaky and he knows it. He deliberately misled you, saying he needs a bigger car to pick up his friends… In a 328? What does he plan to do, ferry them from airport to home one at a time? It sounds like you’ve solved the problem by making him an ex, and I hope your new boyfriend respects your boundaries and your possessions.
So glad you stood up for yourself. Your boundaries should be respected. He also lied. He said he needed a bigger car not a bigger engine. He went back to your apartment after he knew you were at work? Piss his conniving lying arse goodbye
He said you don't trust him. He deliberately tried to pull a fast one on which car to use. And then entered your apartment afterwards to try and get the car. And then he ran to mummy and daddy when he didn't get his way. Boo fucking hoo.
Message his mummy and daddy and tell them that they shouldn't be coveting someone else's possessions and to focus on what they own. Then block them. Then tell your boyfriend that you hoped he enjoyed walking to the airport and block him. Be petty.
NTA.
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NTA. First I am sorry for your lose. Your boyfriend is a sneaky insensitive asshole. He didn‘t ask to borrow the Ferrari. He asked to borrow your car because his was conveniently scheduled for maintenance and your car was bigger. He was deliberately vague. He was lying about his car being scheduled for maintenance and saying your car was bigger lead you to believe that he meant the Land Rover. He already told his friends that he was driving the Ferrari before he even asked you. You have being dating this user loser for 6 months and he thinks he is entitled to drive your dad’s car? Not even any car but a Ferrari. Then he runs to mommy and daddy who have the nerve to tell you that you need therapy and you that you dad is gone and you need to stop being possessive of your fathers things? They are all disgusting! But to answer your question you didn't go too far. He’s doesn’t care about you. I’m glad you got your key back and I hope this means you dumped his sorry ass. Block him and his parents. You deserve better. You are grieving and the last thing you need is this parasite trying to take advantage of you during this difficult time.
Not to mention that he went back when she was out, and searched the apartment thoroughly enough that he knows she took all the car keys with him. I'm 99% sure that if she'd left the Ferrari keys at home he would have taken the Ferrari anyway.
NTA. Security took the spare key off him. Sneaking AF. Is he even insured to drive it cos I bet he would have been driving around showing off in it. Dump this loser asap.
Could you imagine? "Waaahhh I don't want the $80,000 Land Rover, I want the Ferrari"
I'm wondering if he purposely "scheduled" maintenance on the day he had to pick them up (IF he even actually had it done) as well as purposely not mentioning the exact car. He's probably driven the Land Rover before so not being specific about which car he wanted to use was calculating. Wait....exactly how many people did he have to pick up? Maybe I missed something.... ETA- OP said he had to pick up friends. Exactly how many were going to fit into a Ferrari? Something isn't adding up.🤔
It's all adding up quite nicely... Just not in his favor. OP made all the right moves
Yeah. Seems as if he tried to pull one on OP.
Like how is a 2 seater Ferrari able to pick up "friends" plural... when the rover probably has 5/6seats plus luggage. hopefully she is clear of the this piece of work. also Insurance, if he wasnt on it. I wouldnt of gave him the car anyways. something happens. thats on OP
I would have told him tough cookie, no one drives my cars and they are just a Chevy and a Caddy. It’s called get your friends a large Uber if your car is being worked on.
Yep, never loan something out that you can not afford to give away. It has been a rule for me for a long time, and it saves relationships worth keeping and shows you some that aren't.
I'm assuming it's one female friend that he's picking up and he told another lie that it's "friends"
Exactly, this is a 2 seat car and she keeps saying picking up “friends” plural. The “trunk” is also tiny. Like 2 helmets is all that will fit tiny. How would that have worked? This all seems very suspect…
Doesn't Ferrari make an SUV now ? I know , not the point ...
328 is a car, not an suv. yes now they do, but its not called a 328
And the ‘yours is bigger’ - Ferrari to me says small seating-wise… I hope she dumped him
To me, the "yours is bigger" was a set up meaning, he implied that, KNOWING he was referring to the Land Rover but actually wanted the Ferrari. This was piled on in anticipation of OP saying yes...knowing he was going to try the ol' switcheroo at the last minute. Also, his parent's putting themselves into something that was between them is suspect and for something so trivial makes me think they're used to meddling. I'd rethink everything about this manipulative man and his meddling family.
Makes me think he runs to mommy and daddy to fight his battles whenever he doesn’t get his way. Loser!
As a mom it makes me wonder exactly what he is telling his parents because if one of my older sons whined to me that their girlfriend wouldn’t lend them her Ferrari I’d laugh and say “good I wouldn’t let you breathe on a Ferrari that I owned”. He’s probably telling them bits of truth that are covered in bullshit frosting to make her seem like the “bad guy”.
My mom bought a Porsche when I was 16 and made it clear I wasn't ever going to drive it. One of my friends asked if he could and she laughed in his face. 12 years and 3 totaled beaters later the closest I've gotten to driving it is handing her the keys. If I complained that a girlfriend wouldn't let me drive her Ferrari she'd probably throw something at me.
Either he is telling his mom lies or his mom is the "my baby can do no wrong" type of parents.
I love your parenting style! I'm gonna borrow that "...wouldn't let you breathe on..." line!
She had already promised he could use the Ferrari and now she is alienating him from his very close friend(s)! Unless they both drive it all of the time it really doesn't make sense to use it to go pick up multiple people with luggage, that just can't work and doing it to look rich isn't cool when it isn't even yours. It'd be silly if he *did* own it, that car cannot possibly be large enough for "friends."
I don’t think he was ever going to mention which car, I think he was just going to grab that set of keys. He came back to the apartment and just happened to notice she took all of the keys. Not that she moved them or that they aren’t in the key dish… she took them, so he obviously went looking… I doubt he was going to talk to her about anything as he knew she had work, I’m betting he waited till he knew she was gone and was just going to scoop the keys and be back before school Let out like Ferris bueler
Yeah what does the bf drive that’s smaller than a Ferrari?
Obviously a motorcycle
How is he supposed to fit more than one friend and luggage in a 2 seater Ferrari?
The math ain't math'n. Lol!
Thank you .i needed a good chuckle
100%
I'm stuck on that part. I don't know anything about cars but aren't Ferraris small? I can't find a "big" one on an image search.
328 is tiny. Barely fits 2 people. Range Rover probably worth more too at this point but I understand op’s sentimental attachment to the car.
I completely understand the sentimental attachment, too. Bf is a dick
Very small two bucket seats, no trunk and no real backseat. That’s only going from my experience which has included riding in three, owning zero. But I’ve never known them to have a trunk or backseat big enough for more than two bags of groceries and a days worth of mail.
My stepfather had one of those for a bit, can confirm
There's barely room for your handbag in a Ferrari.
I don't know much about cars but even I know, a Ferrari isn't the car of choice to "fit in more people".
Which suggests his friend was really some chick
Right! Was thinking that but in no way wanted to suggest his “friends” were actually a bleach blonde and her DD breast implants.
What???! Did not see that coming!!! And your probably right!!!
He could only fit one “friend” in the Ferrari so you’re probably right lol.
1000% this.
Exactly!😂 He tried it though. 😂
It's probably not even scheduled for maintenance. I doubt most people's significant others ask for appointment confirmation receipts. Plus, car maintenance appointments you can even grab with barely a days notice. There is no way in hell you can't push a car maintenance appointment to before or after the picking up friends from the airport. The entire thing was probably a lie to go, joy riding in a Ferrari, and sounds like the exact scenario where someone may get reckless having fun and wreck it Even worse, let their "friend" drive it. There is also no guarantee the friend was a guy or even coming from an airport, if he may as well be trying to impress another woman. We have heard stories about people cheating in their spouses bed, this is not a stretch.
I read the post again. It seems the boyfriend let everybody know they were driving a Ferrari. Except the OWNER of the Ferrari. Stevie Wonder even saw this coming!
It’s adding up perfectly hon, you just aren’t using “douche bag” mathematics.
I love this response! 😂😂😂😂
Lol thanks a have a PHD in “smartassery”. Lol. And I’ve also been married twice and I have four children, needless to say I’m not afraid of anything, and can make almost any situation have an element of humor,,,without that skill I would have done myself in decades ago. Lol.
Lol! That takes dedication and I applaud yours! 😂❤
Thank you. It’s nice to be appreciated for your skills, no matter how useless. 😊
And he said he wanted to take her car since it is bigger. So, his car is smaller than a Ferrari?
That's where it falls apart. If his car is smaller than the Ferrari, it's clearly a clown car. And those can famously fit bunches of people.
He drives a matchbox version of her Ferrari. He even makes the car sounds when he pushes it around. 28:1 scale. Lmao. NTA, OP. And his parents are ripping you? #1, butt lout. #2, involving themselves in a 6 month old BF/GF relationship? The fam is cuckoo.
His car was never going into the shop for repairs, that was a lie. He was able to drive his vehicle to her appt, use her key to break into her appt. With the intention of stealing her car. He Searched the appt so thoroughly he knew she took the keys with her. Dude has lied to her a dozen times just over this one thing alone. He has probably been lying to her constantly.
Dayummmm! I didn't even think of that! I hope OP's reading these comments!
Who schedules maintenance on a day they knew they needed to drive somewhere? This was planned.
Exactly and if maintenance was really scheduled, wouldn't the first person they'd let know was OP because they just might have needed a ride?
How small is this guy's car if a ferrari is the bigger vehicle? Unless he drives a hotwheels car he obviously meant the landrover... The fact that his parents called her means he was really up to something stupid!
I bet there's no trip to the airport either...
He really told on himself with the “I can’t believe you took all the keys” thing. Why would you know that all the keys were gone unless you went back after OP left to look for the keys?
Yep, and he's a major user and it's clear he gets it from his parents.
I'm wondering how he weaseled his way into moving in with her in that I'm sure is way less than 6 months into a relationship.
He definitely didn't go back to her apartment to "talk things over" he went back to try to steal her car.
>He definitely didn't go back to her apartment to "talk things over" he went back to try to steal her car. I guess he wanted to talk to the air, since she wasn't even home.
This dude would have left op on the hook for over 30k in damages minimum. They tire would be bald brakes and calipers likley worn out and axtensive damage to the paint from concrete and asphalt and possible frame dmg. A paint job may be 15k dude wanted a antique ferrari to joyride in. This is a car manufactured in 1988 is officially an antique car replacing parts and finding the original paint for the body would be extremely expensive and very difficult.
I bet he used to work as a valet in Chicago in 1986.
Nah man this is why luxury car rental place have so many hoops to jump through because in the past people rented out high end muscle cars or lamborghinis porsche or ferrari and got the cars back with tire bald brakes worn out calipers busted paint scratched or chipped ops boyfriend is one of these types. This exact situation is why luxury car rental services deny rentals if they believe people are going to go on wreckless joyriding sprees
I was thinking Ferris Bueller.
💯 how I read that. 😂😂
No question about it. That is some usurping parasite on a whole another level.
And that would have been grand theft auto. He would have been arrested and spent time in jail and with how insistent he was on showing it off to his friends probably would have crashed it. Together 6 months and thinks he's entitled to her stuff especially after her dad just died. Ridiculous. Definitely needs to dump him which it's reading like she did.
For sure, that's why she took the keys. Why are you together still OP? Major red flag. NTA
Yes. Break up with him, change the locks, and I’d even put a camera up where the cars are parked.
The fact that she even thought to do this says a lot. Her gut instinct was right.
And then said she didn't trust him and she was crazy for that.... but you did exactly what she believed you would do and you got caught. The gaslighting is real
im 100% sure that was the real reason he went back. He had no intention of talking things out, he knew she left for work and figured he could sneak out the ferrarri keys and still have his joyride. OP needs to dump this loser.
I agree with you 100%. The nerve of this guy is equal parts entitled and disgusting.
100%.
I also hate the idea of someone showing off something that has absolutely nothing to do with them! He didn’t inherit a Ferrari! He didn’t work to buy a Ferrari! He didn’t have a genie grant him the wish of a Ferrari!! He wanted to borrow a Ferrari from his gf to show off to his buddies. How is that showing off anything except he chose well when looking for a gf? The last poster was dead on about how he was shady about the whole deal! He straight lied about wanting a bigger vehicle to get his buddies!! Then this dude does something so childish I can’t even believe I have to address it!! He calls mommy and daddy to cry on their shoulders because his big bad gf won’t let him drive the grown up car! Are you fucking kidding me?!?! What’s worse is that the parents actually have the gall to call the OP and lecture her about it!! OMG! No we see why the bf is such a child…because he’s still being breastfed! No, you didn’t overreact in any way! I would consider keeping his picture with security and keeping the prohibition on him entering!! He’s a child in a man’s body and you are NTA!!!!
I don't think he called them. I suspect he still lives with them and they are seething at losing the chance to offload him.
If she lives in a building with security, she must have some degree of lifestyle that he, and his parents, thought he had access to.
Yeah, I got that from the whole Ferrari vs. Land Rover situation lol
He also probably had to go borrow their car to pick up his friends since he screwed himself over.
Imagine promising your friends you're picking them up in a Ferrari and instead showing up in the "mom mobile". Massive BURN, LOL.
Oh so much this!! Does he have an ounce of self esteem that he's going to show off dead FIL's car to his friends as if it's some achievement? What idiot friends would they be if they didn't ask how the daughter of a W got with such an L.
Dump him and move on. He has no respect for you or your belongings.
Not to mention disrespect for a child still mourning the loss of a parent. Huge red flag.
He would probably have been driving recklessly anyway and had he crashed It wouldn’t have had the money to fix it.
This pretty much nailed it.
It's worth noting that a Ferrari 328 isn't bigger than his car unless his car is a quad bike. They aren't spacious.
328 fits two people, no more.
There are far too many videos on r/idiotsincars of people who don't know how to drive high performance cars crashing Ferraris, Lambos, Corvettes, etc. OP's BF + 'friends' = potential disaster
[удалено]
Regardless, I bet anything he would have given in to his friends begging him to let them drive it - and they've probably been drinking on the flight.
They raced it against a Camry and it lost. A decade ago.
This guy gets it. Get rid of the parasite.
He doesn't even sound like he should have be old enough to drive when he acts like that tbh
Just reread that ages. How tf in hell is this dude 30????
30 going on 5!!
Some people are remaining larvae way too late in life.
Was going to say pretty much the same but you've completely nailed it. To get his parents on the OP's case though , WTAF? Edit: AND her father is recently deceased (sincere sympathies OP) and they think she is too attached to his possessions? My blood is boiling at the conduct of these people as I lost my Dad 5 years ago and still get teary moments. Dump him sweetheart, he is appalling and you sure don't want to marry into that family.
I guard my Dad's guitars with my life. He passed 12 years ago. His music sheets, and his military awards too. His college writing binder? I read the stories to my kids. He was an awesome writer, wonderful way with words. For a while after he passed, you couldn't pry those guitars more than a few feet from me if I didn't have to go to work or something not guitar friendly, lol. I'm less twitchy about them now, but they're still my most precious treasures.
I totally get you, those are absolutely priceless treasures x
This is a very spot on assessment. Unreservedly NTA. But your boyfriend (should become an ex) certainly is a major one. I would never even dream of asking anyone to borrow a Ferrari.
Dump him. He can't win so he gets mommy and daddy involved. He has a spine the consistency of cooked spaghetti. Mommy and daddy would always come first.
Not mommy and daddy. Only himself. Only mom and dad as a means to put himself first. He sounds like the type of guy who would trick mom into signing the house over to him, then selling it, and kicking her onto the street.
Spot on
All of this. He might be the scrub TLC were singing about. NTA.
Listen to Nanner Puddin'.
NTA > I asked him why he couldn’t use his car and he said that his is booked in for maintenance that day and mine was bigger anyway. > >The Ferrari is a 328 I'll confess to knowing nothing about cars but google tells me that the Ferrari is tiny. So he lied to you. Plus it doesn't look like the kind of vehicle that is suitable for an airport pickup. Let alone for multiple people. He just wanted to flex to his friends with your car. He went back to yours and tried to find the keys after you had left for work? Then bitched about it to his folks? None of this is a good sign. Don't doubt yourself on this. You did not go too far.
It sounds like a multi-headed toxic AH. (Because his parents raised him to be the AH). I’m so sorry a group of people came at you to back their manipulative son and try and make you feel like you were the superficial person here. (“Having healthy boundaries” tends to be received as personal attacks if someone is unhealthy/toxic). Good on you for taking the keys with you. That’s wild of him.
Exactly, a 328 is a classic mid engine two seater, and 'friends' was given as plural, so you ain't getting more than one in there, never mind anything bigger than a carry on Old Ferraris aren't known for reliability, care needs to be taken when driving and if someone's borrowing it to show off to their mates, chances are that's not the case, and guarantee he wouldn't foot the bill should he break something, it's not the kind of thing you'd go to your local garage for
It's a terrible idea to let a random moron flog a mid engined car but on reliability, older Ferraris are known for running best when they are given the occasional "Italian tune-up" (also known as "hitting redline a few times"). They tend to work better if they're actually driven. None of this changes the fact that OPs bf driving it is a terrible idea. More just a fun fact.
I’m adding nothing of value, but 308s/328s/355s are all realllllly solid cars for their age.
I've picked up my partner from the airport in a Ferrari. It's definitely unsuitable. Fun though. But it was "my own goddamn car*.
I’ve been picked up by a friend in a Shelby cobra unknowingly I had to hold my luggage in my lap on the freeway and couldn’t see in front of me. It was incredibly impractical but my friend though it was funny He ex is an idiot
When I came home from the military, I had my dad pick me up from the airport because my parents had a full size pickup truck and a minivan, so there would be plenty of room for my luggage and my friend from the military also needed a lift home. So I was absolutely pissed off when my dad showed up in MY car, which was a 90s Honda civic 2 door hatchback that didn't even have AC, and he brought my older sister along too. I was like, what were you thinking? How are we supposed to fit 12 pieces of luggage in my tiny ass car in addition to a 4th person that I didn't agree to pick me up. He said that he thought I might like to see my car since i had been gone for 8 months and he didn't think I'd have that much luggage despite me telling him that I had a lot of luggage and to bring the minivan. The hatch was completely full that you couldn't see out of it. Luggage was stacked to the ceiling of the back seat. Luggage was on the floor, on our laps, just everywhere. So annoying.
He said he was picking up "friends", and the 328 is a 2-seat sports car. Where are you going to put 3 adult men and luggage for 2 of them in a Ferrari 328? Strap one man to the hood?
This guy has so much gall, I wouldn't be a bit surprised if he was going to pick up a girlfriend.
Makes me wonder if he’s lying. He’s a sneaky person anyways; wouldn’t put it past him
I'm kinda thinking that the Ferrari would have gone missing if OP had let him take it. I mean, his "friends" wouldn't have fit, he was so insistent that he went back to search for the keys to steal it, and his parents were way too invested in their son stealing the car. Parted out, they could have made bank; the steering wheel alone is worth ~$2500.
NTA Your ex-boyfriend I hope...That boy does not deserve a relationship with you. He is way too focused on what he can get out of you. Also, uncapable of seeing he is in the wrong and calling you selfish?! RED FLAGS ! Find yourself a man that can respect you and your things, that is open with his intentions, that isn't looking to take advantage of your position in society, that is loving towards you and puts you and your connection above his friends. Take care!
Right, hope she takes back the apartment key too.
You spelled "changes her locks" wrong.
That would be my next move. Just because they took back the spare key, who’s to say he hadn’t secretly made another at some point. Wouldn’t trust it based on the behavior he’s already displayed.
she’s updated the post, the apartment took his key and has banned him from entering at all
OP also needs to not be giving the next bf a key to her apartment before they've been together six months. She seems kind of naive, but at least she took the key and has him barred from entry. I guess that's a start. NTA but please value yourself enough to not tolerate men who only value you for what you can provide them.
*< he said that his is booked in for maintenance that day and mine* ***was bigger anyway****. >* Totally implying he deeded the LandRover for the transportation. *< He got pissed and said that his friends were expecting him to show up with a Ferrari and that they were excited about going for a drive in it.>* He all planned it ahead, it wasn't even a mere airport pick up, they were going to take it for a spin. ** How did he know you took all the keys. 'Cause he looked for them and couldn't find them! **
He KNEW you were at work. He was just looking for the keys.
**
Because their son couldn't show of SOMEONE ELSE's car?
They all sound toxic and unhealthy to me.
Your father only past away two months ago! (I'm really sorry for your loss)
And you've only been with him for a mere 6 months!
*< I was so pissed about him going through my apartment, I called security and they took my spare key from him and have his picture up as a do not allow to enter. Did I go too far?>*
Nope you didn't. You forgot to mention him as an **EX,** which I hope for you he is now.
NTA
Agreed. And gosh, his parents are just terrible. They're trying to convince her that she's five and it's something as mundane as a toy that she needs to share. And um, no. Like even if it wasn't emotionally precious because it was her late dad's car, it would still be *hers*. It would still be a very expensive item that she owned, and she has every right to make a judgement call on who she trusts to treat it well and bring it home in good condition. And for the record, OP, top of the list of people who won't treat your car with respect are: * people who try to trick you into letting them use your car, * people who try to guilt trip you into letting them use it with "but I already told my friends we could", * people who sneak into your house when they know you aren't home in order to steal your car keys and car when you've already said no, * people who whinge to mummy and daddy that you won't let them play with your car, * people who downplay how important and precious the car is, and try to convince you that your concerns are unreasonable.
Hit every single nail square on the head. OP, he better be your ex-boyfriend, because he tried to steal your Ferrari and would have gaslit you into believing you'd promised him the Ferrari.
A 30 year old man tattled to his parents about someone not sharing
Really, how do you go back to someone’s apartment to talk things over when you know they’ve left for work? He’s not good at his game 😂
All of this. Dad died TWO MONTHS ago. There are people who do not go back to work that quickly after losing a parent. NTA. Drop this loser and his crazy toxic parents
NTA, but he sure is. You did the right thing, and I hope that he is permanently gone from your life.
Also hopping on to ask, in what world is a Ferrari a bigger car? “Friends from the airport” implying multiple friends AND luggage, where is all that supposed to fit in a Ferrari?? NTA Also, he def went back to the apartment to look for the keys, not to “talk it out” that’s shady shady behavior
NTA and I’d be done with this guy. His behavior and having his parents contact you is ridiculous. Also, good thing you took all the car keys, he obviously went back to find them (or how else would he have known?)
Yeah and he would have taken the key’s to the Ferrari if she didn’t.
NTA - and hopefully he’s your ex. He went back to your apartment to take the keys and drive the car anyways. On top of the fact that he’s gotten his parents involved? How old is this guy? 12? So many red flags stitched together on him, you might as well put a white beard on him and call him Santa.
NTA. This after 6 months? Girl you did right to bounce his greedy entitled ass to the kerb.
Definitely NTA I think you acted very wisely Good luck finding a more appropriate partner
NTA at all. Your bf is an asshole. Please break up with him. He is lying about coming over to talk and wanted to steal the keys to your car when you were gone. You absolutely did the right thing by taking your keys and having security not let him in anymore. His parents are also psycho for saying what they said to you. The whole family is disgusting you don’t need that in your life.
NTA No you did not go too far. He tried to manipulate you into using a sentimental item that he knew you would not give direct permission to use. Then he entered your apartment to STEAL YOUR CAR KEYS. And got hos parents involved. Get him out of your life.
>his mum and dad telling me I need to go to therapy because I’m too attached to things If his mummy and daddy believe their son deserves to drive a Ferrari, they should buy him one. NTA - ditch the leech.
Completely agree. Isn't it 'nice' how generous people are with someone else s money/belongings?
nope, good for you! and block all the AHs that are telling you all of that nonsense - it's been 2 months and losing a parent is hard. NTA btw, is your bf maybe related to the dude from about a year ago that took his gf's Porsche to brag to his friends and ended up doing so much damage because he and his friend went and drove it in the FIELD?! 😂😂
Sadly, I remember that dude. Maybe I should take a break from this sub :D Then again, maybe not. ;)
same 😂😂 although, that dude is kind of hard to forget as he claimed he didn't know you shouldn't drive a Porsche in a field 😆
NTA. Borrowing a car means borrowing any car. If he wanted to take the Ferrari, he should have asked directly.
NTA. He wants to show off to his friends which means he's going to drive fast because his friends want to. He wrecks it it's on you not him because it's in your name. Protect your assets and NEVER let anyone drive your cars who is not on your insurane or has their own money to cover damages, partner or not. I won't let my 22 year old daughter's boyfriend drive hers or my cars as long as they are under my name and insurace because of his road rage and not having a job and no motivation to get one. Dump the loser before you waste more of your life with this mess.
How many people can he fit in a Ferrari 328. Was he planning on picking them up one at a time and driving them home separately. He said 'Friends', plural. Pretty sure this car can only hold two people. based solely on my google search. i dont think it has a backseat. And the way he asked was sneaky as hell. Why would OP think he meant the Ferrari when he said his own car wasnt roomy enough. Sure take the Land Rover, makes sense. Also 6 months and bro thinks he get to drive the Ferrari. Her deceased fathers Ferrari. What a tool. NTA and sounds like he is an ex now anyway
Maybe it’s a convertible like the Ferrari in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off and one friend is going to pull a Cameron and squish into the backseat area.
You know he snuck back into your home in order to steal your car, right?! It's utter bollocks that he wanted to discuss things further with you 🙄 Get rid of this parasite ASAP and change your locks just in case. NTA
He obviously went back to your apartment to get the keys despite what you said, otherwise how did he know they were missing? And he went to his parents complaining about you, really? This is someone who doesn’t respect your boundaries. There’s a lot of red flags waving about here NTA
Thank God you only wasted 6 months on him. NTA.
My uncle has a luxury car that was bought by his late wife. He’s a very practical guy, but he never sold the car after her passing. I can tell it means a lot to him. I’d never even dream of asking permission to drive the car. I’d be scared to even drive it around in an emergency, much more just to show off to my friends. Your boyfriend should understand what things are sentimental to you even without saying.
NTA - in Scotland we would call your little boyfriend a “chancing prick”. Tell him to GTF and go for a nice drive in your Ferrari where you’ll see lots of appreciative glances of people who appreciate beautiful cars, like your Dad did. You can do better, toots!
He tried to manipulate you and he lost. NTA. He could have taken the bigger car. His loss.
NTA, I can’t believe his parents said those things on top of everything! I would be seriously reconsidering my relationship if I was in your position. I treasure everything left to me from special people in my life- I put equal importance on everything, whether it’s small gifts I gave them when they were alive to expensive items left to me in their will. I’m sorry for your loss, don’t let anyone guilt you as you are well within your rights
If a Ferrari 328 can fit all his friends then whichever car he has definitely can lmao, he just wanted the rizz in front of his boys
NTA - and his FRIEND(s) plural? The 328 is a two seater, how many people was he picking up?
Running to mommy and daddy is such a tell… run and never look back. NTA.
You didn't go far enough to be honest. .. well, right up until you had security remove him and take away his access key.. THAT was far enough . You don't need a user in your life.
Kicking him to the curb will be “far enough”.
Why are his parents involved? What is he 12?
NTA this guys sounds like he’s using you. It not that your attachment to material things is unreasonable it’s that the car belonged to your father. And on top of that it has only been about 8 weeks 60 days-ish. That’s so insensitive for someone who you have trusted into your home and life. You deserve better. Your father would have wanted someone better for you.
Leave him. Leave him. And don't look back. He sounds like a leech and you are NTA
The parental backup alone would be thge last straw for me. What's next, they come kocking down my door because "you can't make my diddykins wash his own laundry, I demand that you stop!"
NTA. He is attempting to emotionally manipulate you. Do not feel bad that he and his friends aren’t out joyriding in your dad’s car.
NTA Knowing you were at work, he went back to your apartment ostensibly to 'talk things out'. And as long as he was there, in the empty apartment, he just happened to notice that the keys to the cars were gone...... Especially the keys to an expensive car that was not his that he told his friends he was picking them up in WITHOUT asking you, the owner, first. This guy was prioritizing his friends over you, and he was willing to sneak and lie to get his way. And then he called in his mommy and daddy and sicced them on your case. Wow. Just 'Wow'. Please tell me you don't see yourself married to someone who acts like this.
I didn’t even have to read the story to tell you you’re NTA. It’s your property. Point blank period.
NTA. Your hopefully now EX-boyfriend is, at the very least, inconsiderate and immature. This was a vehicle you inherited from your dad who has not been gone long at all. He gets his parents to text you (WTF?). He only went back to your apartment to sneak the car keys, so you did the right thing in having security remove them from him. He's probably the type of clown who would drive that car without permission and cause an accident by showing off for his friends. He never wanted to drive the Land Rover, he wanted the Ferrari all along because, to him, it is compensation for his penis, which you should never avail yourself of again.
NTA! you totally did the right thing and i do hope he becomes your ex soon because there are so many red flags to count is unbelievable. and his parents are pieces of work too telling you to go to therapy and being possessive of things when you dad is gone. rid the bf and parents because it sounds like a family of grifters trying to pull things over on you
NTA, he needed a car to pick people up & you agreed that he can use the appropriate car. Your boyfriend wanted to show off by pretending that the Ferrari was his. & he knows that what he did was wrong, otherwise he'd have specifically asked to borrow the Ferrari from the outset. I suggest you ditch the boyfriend.
There's something suspect about this post. A Ferrari 328 is very definitely a 2 seat car. There's no way the BF is picking "friends" up from the airport unless he is planning multiple trips. I need more information on exactly what the BF was planning, because right now the story doesn't add up. https://www.gallery-aaldering.com/wp-content/uploads/gallery/30155110/30155110-3.jpg
I doubt the airport was real. He just needed a sensible sounding reason to borrow a car. He didn't define which car. Then meet up at a car park and play donuts for a while.
Came looking for someone questioning this whole thing. I call fake as long as op answers 0 comments and the multiple plural "friends" isn't explained somehow lol
Nta Change the locks and run
He's showing red flags get rid
Best move. You don't need this poser in your life
NTA, nobody should promise anything about stuff that isn't theirs. Telling his friends he'd take them for a spin in someone else's car is out of line.
NTA- I feel for you. I’m sorry for the loss of your dad firsthand, that’s shocking behaviour from your boyfriend of 6 months. He has no right to your dad’s car, that’s yours alone. Take all the time you need. If he cared enough for you he would appreciate such a beautiful gift from your dad.
6 months in!? Please ditch this man. You’d be doing yourself a favor. NTA
Nope. You did great.
Ha. NTA. You misspelled ex though.
I am sorry for your loss. And I am so proud of you for setting boundaries and sticking to them. 💯NTA. Do not second guess yourself for even 1 more minute!!
NTA my Dad's been dead 12 years. I am still protective over his favourite tractor. Let alone a fucking ferrari.
NTA. Not even a little bit. He lied to you about why he wanted your car (I doubt his car is smaller than a Ferrari) and then went to complain to his Mum & Dad.
NTA. You reacted exactly the right amount. Your bf and his family clearly just want to benefit off of you and have no respect for you, your belongings, your recent loss, or your boundaries. Definitely end the relationship and continue to make sure he cannot gain access to you, your apartment, or your cars.
NTA He deliberately mislead you. He's shown you he's a liar and a manipulator who cannot be trusted. He's shown that he values showing off to his friends above your trust. He's shown that he doesn't respect you or what you say (going into your apartment after you kicked him out of it) You'd be a fool to trust him again, Believe him when he shows you who he is and what he values, and remember that no matter what he says going forward, he's shown that it's not you.
NTA, he’s trying to use you as a sugar momma
NTA. His parents saying you’re “too attached to things” means that they were prepared to say the same thing when he wrecked the car. Which he was probably not exactly planning, but would happen accidentally, and would be your fault anyway for a) having such a nice car and b) lending it to him. Since option b was off the table *he tried to steal your car*. He tried to steal your car. That’s how much your boyfriend respects you. He tried to “trick” you and when that failed he just straight up tried to steal from you. And when he wrecked it, he would have still blamed you.
Nope. Just know he is now an EX ( and rightfully so)
Automatic NTA as he went crying to his Mummy.
NTA, he was being sneaky and he knows it. He deliberately misled you, saying he needs a bigger car to pick up his friends… In a 328? What does he plan to do, ferry them from airport to home one at a time? It sounds like you’ve solved the problem by making him an ex, and I hope your new boyfriend respects your boundaries and your possessions.
NTA. Throw the guy and his whole family away.
So glad you stood up for yourself. Your boundaries should be respected. He also lied. He said he needed a bigger car not a bigger engine. He went back to your apartment after he knew you were at work? Piss his conniving lying arse goodbye
NTA. Your hopefully ex-boyfriend is, though.
NTA "friends" - Your 328 is a 2 seater. "your car is bigger" - WTF does he drive? A Peel P50? Get rid as he doesn't care what you want or say.
He said you don't trust him. He deliberately tried to pull a fast one on which car to use. And then entered your apartment afterwards to try and get the car. And then he ran to mummy and daddy when he didn't get his way. Boo fucking hoo. Message his mummy and daddy and tell them that they shouldn't be coveting someone else's possessions and to focus on what they own. Then block them. Then tell your boyfriend that you hoped he enjoyed walking to the airport and block him. Be petty. NTA.