It only edifies your narcissism and sociopathy. Why make a kid? To make a human in your own image or ego. Put them in harms way for your own pride. It’s all about you. Social norms, obligations, pleasing parents, Not the kid. Just you. The kid doesn’t even exist yet, so don’t be selfish.
Kaya sana if ever magkaroon ako ng kids sana they will love me unconditionally hindi dahil sa mana ang habol if ever haha sa buhaya naman talaga theres always pros and cons. Mamili lang tayo ano mas prefer natin😊
Deprivation of responsibility - necessity for maturity.
You don't get to experience "peak" of life if you're not driven by purpose.
Missing this unique relationship.
Your level of maturity will not be the same as having someone so important in your life.
(I can't imagine myself having no kids at the age of 45, things get uninteresting when you age.)
The moment relatives (especially the older ones) find out that it's an intentional decision (not related to health), you will be questioned/criticized for the rest of your lives.
I feel like same with living. parang puro cons mabuhay pero worth parin Naman kahit paminsan Minsan napapaisip Ako na ndi tlga worth. Pero may mga bagay na napapasabi Ako na worth sya. I think same with having a child. Mafefeel mo lng once na experience mo na. Iba Kasi yung alam mo lng vs nafefeel mo tlga and youre living it
Let’s not put everything in pros and cons because I would never tell my kid (if I had one) that I would rather have a comfortable lifestyle than having him or her.
Here is what I see the value of having a kid:
1.) The beauty of birth - It is no surprise that there is no experience like seeing what was part of you come to life. That glowing bundle of joy can make any grown man cry. It is probably by (God’s Design) the nature of our species that we love our offsprings, as they represent the culmination of our experiences that led to this moment.
2.) Learning from fresh eyes - As new parents, they’ll take on challenges most probably that they didn’t expect. From sleepless nights to going way over budget. These problems can be resolved through proper planning and thorough execution but the most difficult role of a parent is what they want their child to be. Sometimes it is difficult to tell, I mean it can barely speak! Yet it is important to make him or her try new things and and see how they react to the world. From there you might learn a thing or two they might share with you.
3.) Emotional Rollercoasters - This is probably THE REASON why I would want a kid because they are a source of feelings. Did my kid just spoke the longest English word? I will clap with joy for him. Did my kid fell on his bike? What a dumbass, welp… gotta go help him. Did my kid had his first break up? I would thank him for telling me about it. I mean how on earth would you not like having your own k-drama show in front of you, it is entertaining,
4.) Ambitions and Aspirations - This is where my kid is finally having his first year in college. I probably pushed him to do a specific course, but he made his choice clear and wanted whatever he chose. And I would fully support it anyway. He makes his new experiences and becomes inevitably more independent. His actions will be a reflection of how I raised him. I really wished I did right. I will wish him all the best. There, I would probably pursue my own hobby or travel with my wife.
5.) Death and Meaning - This will happen in 60’s and beyond and I can never imagine it but, if I ever reach point where I will reminisce my life, I want to make sure that every choice I made was made out of intention not out of accident or regret. And my children will be one of my pride and joys of being alive in this world.
The assumption in this thread is that you're going to have delightful kids. That's not always the case.
So for me having kids is neutral in that aspect. You get a good kid - positive. Some people will get kids who become drug addicts - negative.
Passing on the genes as the sole reason is a selfish reason to have kids IMO.
Wala talaga akong planong mag-anak eversince. Kasi nakatatak na sa utak ko na ako ang bubuhay sa pamangkin, magulang, kapatid at apo ko. Parang nakaset na yung ganong mindset sakin. I was supposed to go abroad para magwork para sa future ng pamilya ko but I got pregnant.
It changed me. It made me happy. It gave me hope. Actually OP ang layo ng sagot ko sa tanong mo pero nung nagkaanak ako tsaka ko lang narealize yung mga bagay-bagay. To achieve more and dream big hindi na para sa mga gumamit lang sakin kundi para na sa sarili kong pamilya.
I stopped sending money and supporting my siblings etc. tapos dun ko nalaman totoo nilang ugali. Siniraan online. Nakatanggap ng death threats. In short, lumabas totoong kulay.
Ngayon, I was able to secure my own fam in our own house and lahat ng needs at wants ng anak ko nabibigay ko. I dedicate my life to my child because she gave me hope that I deserve better.
I love this thread!!! Hindi maipaliwanag ang cons, sa sandamakmak na hirap pagdadaanan mo pag may anak ka pero grabe un feeling kase pag may anak ka, just one smile and hug from those little monsters, life became so easy sometimes ..
Having someone who was once a zygote in an ultrasound film saying “I love you, daddy” is priceless. Tears me up all the time.
Every day is a miracle when you are a parent.
Cons would be:
-Having too much freetime
-Having less significant additional stress
-Being able to save money
-Being able to travel
-Being able to sleep
-Not being worried about making enough money to support them
-Not being worried about keeping an entire human being safe and sound and fed
-Freedom
-You'll likely end up having hobbies or collections because they won't get destroyed by your kids
-You'll probably have to deal with your house being clean since it's not gonna get trashed randomly every day
-Probably end up with more money than you know what to do with since you won't have to worry about paying their tuition
-You might end up with too many hobbies and accidentally start making money off them
-You won't get to experience the teen angst phase or even better, having a daughter and dealing with boys etc
If you're not really into these things then definitely have kids
I have never seen a love so pure as that of my baby’s whenever we have our cuddle time. Ang cliche and ang selfish man pakinggan pero totoong mahal na mahal ko yung anak ko tapos ibang feeling pag alam mo din na may maliit na taong nagmamahal sayo.
Ang sarap. Nakakatakot yung responsibility, oo. Pero grabe yung sarap sa pakiramdam. Nakakaiyak.
I believe it depends on whether you would want your genes/properties/possessions or anything material passed on to the next generation cause in my opinion, if you find yourself enough, and you don't want to have any mark left in the world then why even have kids at all?
People would usually say that you should have kids in order to have someone take care of you when you're old but let's be honest here, most of the time, the elderly are just left in nursing homes, or would instead be burdened by the growing families of their sons/daughters.
If you are happy with a pet I’m 100% sure you will be happy with having your own child. Imagine a pet that you can teach, can talk, looks like you, wash the dishes, get a profession, out grow you, help you out when your old. Compared to that dog that only eat and shit.
Cons: same as a pet, it drains your resources and you love it more than yourself
I'm not into having kids with my fiancee before now my wife, pero naisip namin na I will inherit properties with my parents sa province.
So ang cons baka mapilitan ako ibenta lahat and hindi ko naman madadala sa hukay ang kayamanan kaya sa unico hijo ko na lang lol.
My tita is now around 54 or 55 years old. Na-discourage siyang mag asawa because of family history. She was more than willing to help her nephews and nieces, like me. I just graduated from college and syempre, gusto kong lumipad para makapagtrabaho. But most of the times, I worry na what if magkasakit siya, walang mag aalaga.
Perks di magastos walang responsibility masyado. Pag my anak ka focus ka talaga sa goal dapat handa sa responsibility bilang parents para ma supportahan ang anak. Kong mababa pasensya wag na mag anak kawawa lang ang bata. Cons depende sa tao walang companion pag tanda wala kang makikitang progress like yon anak mo nakita mo lumaki gang mag asawa at napalaki ng maayos. The rest is depende sa tao ang cons. As a parents very fulfilling na nakikita ang anak ko lumalaki ng maayos
I have a 2 year old which takes extra time, sacrifice, effort and care. Dagdag sa responsibilities. BUT without her i think all i would feel are the stresses of life and work which will be there whether i had a child or not. She brings me joy.
There will be experiences that one will never know if they decide to not have kids. Sure, we are all familiar with the hardships of raising kids, but there are also events that only parents can fully appreciate.
Seeing your child for the first time is a weird but overwhelmingly joyous experience. Holding your child for the first time feels amazing yet scary, as you fear that you might be holding the baby wrong. All the milestones that a child reaches; their first word, their first step, calling you "papa" or "dada" for the first time, and many more, are things that you celebrate even though they are simply things that babies do as they grow up. My child hasn't reached this point yet, but I look forward to seeing her take her first steps in school, successfully count 1-10, and maybe get her first "outstanding star."
Being a parent means you will usually be the first witness to your child's growth and, for me at least, this is the best feeling ever.
Minsan ka lang mabubuhay sa mundo. Kumpletohin mo yung experience. Ako noong binata pa ako napaka walang direksyon ng buhay ko. Wala akong pake sa kahit ano. Kahit sa magulang ko pa. Nag rerebelde ako. Pero nung nag ka anak ako, naintindihan ko lahat. Naintindihan ko mga decision ng parents ko tama man o mali. Nagkaron ako ng drive mag work di yung kung kelan at san ko lang gusto tas bahala na kung wala. Di ko sinasabe na sapat na reason yun mag anak pero kung nag mamahalan naman kayo ng asawa mo at kaya nyo bumuhay ng isa pang tao e why not. Ibang saya ang makita yung mukha ng anak mo paglabas ng delivery room. Ang sarap ng feeling mabili yung laruan na gustonng gusto ng anak mo at pinag ipunan mo. Ang sarap na isurprise sila ng pasalubong galing work tapos magugulat sila may dala kang jollibee. Nakakapagod. Magastos. Pero masarap magkaanak kung may pera ka. Pag namatay ka. Wala nang round 2. Na sa susunod na round, gusto mo naman mag ka anak. Walang ganon. Kaya isipin mo ano ba talaga pumipigil sanyo.
Being child-free allows you freedom without limitations.
Having a child means thinking of something bigger and better for someone other than yourself. It makes you want to live your life—not for hedonistic pursuits, but for your son or daughter.
I have an eight-month-old, and I’ll be honest, parenting is a thankless job. I don’t blame young people who don’t want kids. A child-free lifestyle is pretty much like living out your teenage years but with the financial capacity to do, buy, and experience the things you want this time around.
I, too, had wanted a child-free lifestyle. But I have a son, and if there’s one thing I have noticed about myself, it’s wanting to be a better mother for him. I used to smoke, and I would have continued to do so had it not been for my little boy.
But now, I am no longer living my life just for me…but for him too. Quitting was difficult, but getting to see my son grow up, have his own experiences, and living to witness all of that make it worth it.
Because I want to see all that, I have another reason to live.
I imagine it has a lot of hardy lessons a person can’t learn if not for being a parent. Missing out on those life lessons/experiences can be considered a con by some.
Making goods has become faster and cheaper.
But why is the cost of things going up?
But why is everything around us falling apart?
Elders? Are you sure they know?
Lol i bet most of them fell for the covid19 bullshit which ironically is killing people more than the virus itself.
Life is too toxic, if only people knew how much toxins you have around you. These can affect our mind, body and soul.
Misery loves company.
Walang kang mauutusan kumuha ng tubig pag uugod ugod ka na lol kidding! Ung alaga mong aso or pusa di mo sila mauutusan dalhan ka ng tubig or utusan mo bumili sa tindahan haha mahirap magka anak , pero sobrang thankful ako nagka anak ako maaga kase ngaun he is helping me in small things kase nawalan na kami ng yaya.. tas ang sarap ng may nag sasabi sayo ‘Mommy I love your cooking ‘ Mommy you are the best in this world’ mga ganun.. wag kayong masyadong selfish and matakot mgkaanak. Masarap pa rin may nag titingin tingin sau habang tumatanda tau.
The different feeling of purpose in life. Yung bumabangon ka para humarap sa challenges ng Buhay hinde para sa sarili mo lang. Kundi para na din sa anak ko. Nung single Ako at walang anak feeling ko walang purpose Yung mga ginagawa ko.
Perspective of someone young who has no kids: none. Some parents forget that kids did not choose to be born. Sa kakalimutan nito ginagawang cash cow o scapegoat mga anak. I think society just really pressures people to have children.
(Take this with a grain of salt, after all my opinion might change overtime).
Most of the comments I see here are about not having anyone to take care of them, anyone to pass on their belongings/learning to, or anyone to remember them when they're gone — which I think are pretty much self-serving.
I don't think there's a real con in having no children. I'm a 25 year-old single woman and the thought of having a kid of my own has never crossed my mind yet and I don't feel bothered by these said cons. I believe I can always adopt and take care of a child who's already there needing someone to look after them. Giving birth and rearing a child are difficult jobs especially for a woman, so I beg to differ when people say a childless life would not be as fulfilling as having one. It still depends on how you manage your life and how you divert from the social norms and culture. As for myself, I don't feel the need to nurture someone just to have them as my personal caregiver on my dying days.
There are plenty of genuine relationships you can get fulfillment from that doesn't involve a lot of pain and sacrifice.
I'm not empty, I'm just being realistic.
Generally all the parents that have kid/s will say being a parent is one of the best thing that happened to them.
Even parents who previously said they did not want kids because of responsibilities, etc, etc, etc, they will generally say it is still the best thing that happened to them.
The feeling of simple hug from your kid/s is priceless. The feeling cannot be replicated by my dog.
Good thing is you will never learn what you will miss in life if you will never have a kid.
My suggestion is to have kids if you can. It ain't easy but it's damn worth it.
Hehe actually, i have no kids nor do i plan on having it. I have a mental illness na nasa borderline severe na. I take high dosages of medication na to keep the voices in my head, the emotional turmoil & anxiety at bay.
Nakita ko na dn ung downsides para sa bata for i have seen examples of those the serious mental illnesses na like schizo or psychopath/sociopaths and narcisissists. Nananakit ng bata kasi yung temper di ma-control.
Tapos btw, lahat ng nagiging anak nila meron din halos pareho din na traits. Lilipat pa yun sa 3rd generation kasi kahit ung mga apo, malaki pa dn yung chance. Ganun ka-potent ung genetic illness na mga ganun.
So di lahat ng nandto eh "di mahal ng magulang" nila. In fact, masyado nilang mahal ang mga bata na they're better off not making them.
Dead Bloodline
You wont be able to pass down knowledge and values that makes the world a better place. (considering you have both wisdom and values yourself, assuming reddit people are not the same as twitter people)
To some people, its a life full filling moment and journey when they guided their offsprings to greatness. if not greatness then just guiding their offsprings to a better life than they have.
Its a very difficult task but a rewarding one if you succeeded at being a parent and has guided your kids to the right path, Thats why I dont plan on being a parent yet cause I still hang out on reddit.
Single, no kid millennial here (who wants to have kids RESPONSIBLY)
Yung replies nung mga anti kids kasi here rooting madalas sa irresponsible and undeserving parents. Blocked na talaga yung ‘cons’ part sa kanila no matter what. Understandable.
I feel like if malaking portion ng parents nag-assess muna ng mga sarili bago nagsipag anak
(with that I meant financially, emotionally, mentally, and SPIRITUALLY good ba sila to be one)
millions of reply na siguro tong thread dahil life will be worth living na 🤷♀️
But to answer: Walang maglilibing sayo unless you have siblings or very close younger relatives.
I’m only child and one of my very last wishes in this lifetime e mailibing ako ng mga magiging anak ko 💛
Siguro malungkot kasi parang andun yung idea na magisa ka sa buhay lalo na pag kasal ka na pero walang anak kasi naging angel na yung partner mo... In fact, as the eldest child na laging inuutusan magbantay at alaga sa younger sibs, I thought about not having my own kids in the future but my father would always say na mas masaya talaga kapag madaming anak kahit na dumanas ng hirap. Ineexample pa niya yung mga kakilala namin na namamatayan kasi pag namatay daw yung magulang, kakaiba yung pakiramdam pag atleast madami kang kasama na kapatid sa lamay. Kahit maiwan ka, may makakasama ka.
I think wala namang cons if you choose not to have kids. It's just missing out one part of life and it should not be frowned upon kasi choice yun nung couple/person, and I think in some way masasabi din naten na they are being responsible for their own reasons since today, child birth, milk and food, education, all expensive, or they just want to travel, go out, have a good night sleep, at the back of their mind they don't want kids, because if they had a child and became shitty parents because they can't provide then kawawa din naman yung bata.
For me, a father of a 4-year-old, though I miss things like traveling and buying things for myself, I do not regret my choice. To those couples/people who want and to do those who don't want, let's just agree to disagree and respect each other's choices and don't be an ass about it.
PS. If you are a parent and totorturin mo yung anak mo na paglaki nila ay utang na loob nila and buhay nila sa inyo, you should burn in hell.
Cons can be assessed in different perspectives (which does not absolutely apply to all circumstances and people):
Personal and Intimate:
1. There is no concrete and long-term need for two partners to keep their intimate relationship. We can say having no kids eliminated a vital need for progress from a romantic-sexual dynamic into a more or less intimate form inclusive of other people outside the relationship.
2. Humans physically, mentally and emotionally peak through adulthood before regressing a little bit through old age. Having kids provide a guarantee of a capable adult in the future to take care of you.
Social:
1. As much as society can be judgmental and superficial, having a kid provides an opportunity to pass on your ideals into the future with another human being.
2. Kids also provide an "anchor" of sorts to socially reconnect to the outside world beyond work.
Economic:
1. This might be a cruel fact since I don't know how to rephrase it but having kids increases the chance of economic prosperity in the future and decreases the possibility of an economic collapse (e.g. Japan, China, many EU countries)
Pero, CMV.
There is a kind of wisdom, maturity, and deep abiding love good parents reap that child-free people will never have a chance to gain. Because being good parents require so much sacrifice - a kind of sacrifice that build depth of character - that those without kids can never even imagine. It can be like a wonderful land of adventures that those without kids can never get to. And those who have been to that land cannot describe adequately. You have to be a good parent to experience this side of your humanity. Haist hirap mag explain! Me I have three kids and I know they unlocked the best version of me.
[Kurzgesagt video](https://youtu.be/LBudghsdByQ) on the matter with perspectives from an economical and societal standpoint, as well as some history.
Imo from the sentiments I read, generally it's the following:
1. Regrets from women who waited for too long and now have trouble conceiving. It also increases the chance of birth defects.
2. Your ideology, whatever it may be, is harder to pass. Your expertise, trade, knowledge such as secret recipes, family businesses, cultural traditions etc. might end with you too.
Having no kids will always result in a net neutral to net positive in terms of personal resources. But the value of ***emotional fulfillment*** and ***parental pride*** is subjective and can only be felt when you are in that moment. *It isn't even guaranteed.*
To those who experienced it they might say "it's the greatest thing they ever experienced", but to those who don't, it doesn't mean jackshit.
From someone na walang balak magka-anak as of now (might change my mind sa future) is probably yung yet to exist bond. Like bond with my s/o is enough for me pero I can’t help but think what would it feel if may +1 pa samin. Also, might get downvoted for this but the typical “sayang lahi” especially if good genes hahahah can’t relate tho, kahit wala na sumunod sakin since di naman special HAHAHA
If you are a giver and have no kid, I guess you lose the satisfaction of giving everything you have to your kid. Riches, knowledge, wisdom, manners, culture, love.
When you are old and rich, wealth means nothing if I have no loved one to leave it to.
My husband and I have been DINKs for 4 years before we chose to have a child.
Our child is 6 yrs old now and tbh, I wonder what life would have been if I’ve never known such a human being. This is not even yung OA. Na pag praise sa anak, it’s just that, masaya na kami ng husband ko with our cats, but having our son made our good life even more vibrant and just extra joyous. It’s a level na for 4 yrs as DINKs, we would have never experienced.
So the con? Maybe just experiencing another awesome human being grow right before your eyes, without any expectation for them to give you back anything.
I also don’t want him to grow up taking care of us kaya we are saving up and planning finances as well as investing in our mental and emotional well-being, so our son gets to experience and benefit from this.
I have a 2-yr old and nasa stage ngayon na sobrang challenging. He’s testing his boundaries (and rightfully so). You literally have your heart outside your body. Pag nakikita kong nag-aaakyat, nagtatatalon; minsan kung anu-ano talaga naiimagine kong mangyayari HAHA.
It doesn’t sound so promising. Pero di ko rin naman mapigilan yung kurot sa puso when he smiles!! When he calls me Mama. When he wants me and his papa. When he wants our hugs and tells us he loves being with us. Hay my heart!!!
Selfish naman talaga ang gustuhin magka-anak. It’s all for me — I have so much love to give kaya gusto ko ng anak kahit alam kong di naman na best ang world natin for kids. Kaya naman talagang binubuhusan ko ng pagmamahal at alaga at aral anak ko (and future kids pa hopefully) to make naman their lives worth-while. Yung kahit mahirap at masama na ang mundo ay babalutin sila ng pagmamahal naming mag-asawa.
being excluded from family events with kids or more like your friends with kids will likely make you more distant from each other because your topic are most likely different
Cons would be, wondering "if my kid will be as mindful as I am as a daughter". Hehe..we don't want kids. Maaga nabuntis ang sis ko and the kid literally grew up with us (me, my sis and my bro) alone. I have seen the struggles and I have felt the fulfillment at the same time. 16years later and the struggle is still there. I love my niece dearly but the today's era is just so stressful. I can't fathom the fact that my remaining years will be spent thinking about my child for the rest of my life. I understand the cons that no one will probably take care of me like how I am taking care of my parents but looking at my siblings now, they have no time taking care of my parents din naman eh kasi they have their own family to look after. Sure they can visit if they want (or if need to) pero still, they have their own lives to deal with and my parents are living on their own din naman eh.
Pero sabi nga ng iba, depende na din kung pnu pinalaki ng parents yung mga anak nila, minsan kasi lalaki sila na aantayin lang magkasarili para maka takas sa parents or minsan naman mag aalaga din tlaga sila pag matanda ka na. You will never know what you will get talaga. Ewan. Hehe
May ka kilala lang ako na very successful siya matalino tas chemical engineer. Wala siyang asawa pati anak so parang nawawalan siya ng purpose daw sa life kaya tumigil mag work. Empty daw ang feeling
No man is an island im saying na kahit may partner ka iba yung feeling nung kalinga ng anak, im not saying that make your child a retirement plan, pero iba paren syempre ang pagmamahal at pag aalalaga ng sarili mong kadugo unconditional love. Ang mawawala sayo (if ever)
Walang cons haha! yung mga nagsasabing malungkot yung tumanda ng walang anak, gaano kayo ka-sure? baka sila lang nalulungkot para sa mga walang anak haha
I have an older sister who's in her 50s na and she couldn't be any happier than not having kids.
No one to sing those Disney lullabies to. Pets don't even pay attention to you when you sing them to sleep. Tapos, pag nairita pa sila sayo, kakalmutin ka pa.
Depende, OP. If you're the type na ayaw mo talaga ng kids by choice and you're decided na, I think wala naman cons. Kung deep inside naman eh gusto mo talaga magkaroon ng anak, like another human being na gusto mong buhusan ng pagmamahal, pero na-pepressure ka sa mundo at gastusin, baka ang cons eh magkaroon ka ng regrets sa huli kasi nga gusto mo naman sana talaga.
Thought of this for a long time and eto magiging option ko:
1. Mag-ipon for a trip in Switzerland para sa assisted suicide
2. Mag-ipon ng malaking pera for a retirement community sa ibang bansa kasi WALA DITO
3. Dedicated myself to a lifelong commitment of helping others. So my life can have a PURPOSE. Maybe apply for UN kaya napapaisip ako magtuloy ng medical school so I can help kids in indigenous areas.
They say that a child will change you, I dont believe that. Kasi kung totoo yan, edi sana walang fucked up kids sa mundo na nagrarant sa r/offmychest.
I always think na magsisisi ako na di ako nag-anak, but everytime naaalala ko yung sinabi ng nanay ko sakin na mamatay na ako when I was a kid nawawala yung cons. Di naman porket may anak guaranteed na may magaalaga sayo pagtanda, dumuty ako sa ospital at ang dami dun may anak or worst iniiwan sa hospicio de san jose.
Siguro you'll have the WHAT IFs and the loneliness which is why mahalaga na you have a purpose and you plan what to do with your life.
I think that you don't get to experience the joy of having someone (apart from your husband or your family) who genuinely loves you. Feeling ko ibang level ang love and care na mabibigay ng kids mo, even when you're old.
Sabi ng husband ko, not being able to see how your offspring will look like. Yun lang daw haha
Pero for me, being alive and not being able to experience motherhood is the disadvantage itself. Pero respect to people who do not dream of becoming a mother, to each their own.
No true cons to this because it all boils to what you personally think is/are the downsides to having no kids. The only thing is with pinoy culture you will always get asked about it, that's the only "true" con.
hindi uso home for the aged dito sa pinas so kahit ayaw man ng elderly people napipilitan silang umasa sa pamilya. not necessarily retirement plan agad ang anak but unless kaya mong magpaulan ng pera sa mga pamangkin/kamag-anak mo or unless may maipapamana ka na magpagkakakitaan nila, wag kang mag expect na may tutulong sayo sa pagtanda mo. and mahirap na nga magtiwala sa kamag-anak para swelduhan para magbantay or tumulong sayo, paano na lang if si mo kadugo
Cons of having no kids?None.We have to promote lesser population for the next generation.
I wish I am a billionaire with NGO that can provide Free ligation + Cash benefits who will undergo procedure. (Zeke's plan \\ Attack on Titan)
Ex: Since a lot of household breeds like rabbits in metro manila, i'll ask them to undergo ligation then i'll give cash.
Wala mag-aalaga sayo pagtumanda ka and your slowly dying from illness or old age. Then you die alone. This is happening in japan - ang daming cases na nangamoy yung condo kasi nabubulok na yung katawan ng matanda kasi wala nag aalaga
If you plan to hire a caregiver naman, marami rin cases na manloloko yung caregiver
Iba a pa rin na may pamilya mag aalaga sayo
Senior citizens demographics will pile up bad for the world na mas madaming senior at konti yung younger generation, imagine nlng kung puro mttanda ma exhaust yung health care at social security. Walang mag mamana ng properties at wealth kung meron. Societal level yung naiisip ko. I would prefer yung decent couple na mag anak ng madami. Kaysa yung mga bsta bsta nlng nag aanak ng maling reason or circumstances. Ma over populate ng mga problematic people yung community like those kids na di mag aaral and into commiting crimes.. mas ddami sila kaysa sa mattinong tao..if you will become a parent you will want a better world for your kids which is great, you will become selfless. I dont know. I also watch podcast those people poor to multi millionaire they encourage strong family unit. Yun lng dw greatest contribution mo s mundo..if u raise kids well.. if you keep your bloodline you can timetravel. You already contribute to the future. If the kids have values that will last..
And younger generation will work hard para mapanatiling maayos ang pension ng mga seniors. Kung kaunti ang papalit sa younger generation now, they will still work hard beyond their senior years kasi hindi sapat ang pension.
For example: Singapore, Japan, SoKor, Italy, France etc.
Well its happening to be honest EU, USA, Canada nag ppasok ng immigrants. They prefer yung may anak. Indian has healthy range of younger, working people, China Lie about their population and demographics..nag 1 child policy pa. At mas maraming males than females. I dont know if they can still push seniors na mag work. Give China 10 to 20 yrs. Lets see kung anong ggawin s Seniors nila. Japan and S. Korea are in critical situation pwede silang mawala in 100 plus yrs. I think khit developed countries citizen has long working hours, competitive environment they dont have time na mag anak at ayaw na din nila they experience mental health probs din. Plus some cultures nakka exp pa din ng domestic violence ksi they value male pa din. Dito sa Pilipinas those people who are having kids are in poverty they treat kids as lifeline...a chance to have better life in a future. I dont agree with this reason..but atleast if they love their kids and treated well. Its not impossible na some kids will prosper. Mas may chance pa yung developing countries to prosper as long maintained yung younger population in the future.
As a nurse, single grandparents at the age of 70-90 pass away alone. Syempre patay na rin most family members nya nun. Mga kapatid nya and mga anak ng kapatid nya may mga sariling buhay.
Healthcare worker lang kasama nila when they pass away.
I guess if you don’t have a spouse, not having someone that’s obligated to care for you as you get older, but honestly I would NOT want one of my own children caring for me as I get older. That would make me so uncomfortable for many reasons
Kala ko alam ko na yung feeling ng true love nun naging kami ng asawa ko, pero nun pinanganak yun mga kids ko hayysss iba pala talaga ang feeling. Full circle of life moment. Iba yun experience. Di ko siguro mararanasan un kung wala kami anak.
can’t think of any atp in life. it probably depends person to person. anyway, having kids has its cons, as does not having any. you just have to make a choice about which cons you can live with.
My mom keeps telling me na paano na daw ung generational wealth, sino daw papasahan. Sabi ko, di ka Sy na di ko kaya gastusin lahat yan. I plan to put up a dog shelter in our farm and leave it to a charity. Sell the building, houses and other stuff and live my best life and spend it all before I die. I don't see any cons coz whenever I spend half a day taking care of a child, I thank God I can return them to their parents after. I get this intense longing when I see a pup but I never get it with a baby.
The chance to add a good human being to the population, if you have the ability to raise one...
Problem I see currently is that people who I know who are awesome, kind, smart, caring, and passionate about improving the world are choosing not to have kids while those who have questionable values have 5!
Not having kids is a trend in the internet pero once you bought the stuff you want and travelled to all the places. Life can get dull terrifyingly fast.
Number 1 thing that i kept seeing is that pagod raw etc. After nila mag 16ish years old they’re almost independent na. Not financially pero they start working at 23 years old naman.
I used to not want kids. Pero when I started staying at my single rich successful tita’s place, I realized that I actually want 2 kids.
Nakatira ako sa house with tita ko na walang anak. Wala siyang S/O. Pero mayaman siya. Successful sa career at maraming ipon. She reached the peek of her career at 38yo. Nag sstay ako dito kasi mas malapit sa college univ tsaka nakaka ease ng gastos ng parents ko (3 kami magkakapatid) she treats and spoils me as if anak nya ako she even paid for my tuition sa college. Ganun nya ako ka love hehe and i treat her like a mom rin by giving her handmade gifts
I’ll give you the biggest con: lonely pag wala si S/O mo. Tahimik ung bahay. Pero rich/comfy ka. Lahat mabibili mo. Naikot nya nga buong europe pero travels are time constricted. Ung everyday life nya pag asa bahay tahimik pero may mga hobbies naman siya na marami. Wala ka rin mabibigyan or mapapagmahanan ng mga binili mo this lifetime. When you have money and experienced majority of the things you want. Life can get dull terrifyingly fast. Parang pag nakuha mo na mga gusto mo marrealize mo wala ka nang ibang purpose hangang mamatay ka.
I gave my single tita a handmade crochet doll of her and she told me that it was the best gift she ever recieved in her life. Naka display pa sa living room and she brags to whoever comes in her house (mind you her co workers give her luxury bags, watches etc.)
With my main family naman:
As the eldest daughter: Mahal na mahal ko mom ko. She had me (eldest) at 26 which is early tsaka di pa siya financially stable nun. Ngayon super happy ng mom ko she’s thriving with her new business. And masaya mga gala namin kahit cheap thrills lang. Local travels lang or kahit sa mall lang with my younger siblings. Nakakatuwa kasi quirks ng each child. Maganda childhood ko with her and she super appreciates it pag may ginagawa ako for her and sa mga achievements ko sa life. Kala ng mga tao kasi hahaggard or bibigay mo buong buhay mo sa anak mo pero after they reach 15 they live their own lives na since sa school and friends na most of their time. Para kaming BFF ni mommy hehe. I started having a small buisness at 20 and nakakatuwa na nabibilhan ko siya ng cute clothes, desserts, shoes for my dad and some random stuffs rin. Nakakagaan sa loob magbigay sa parents and they seem to appreciate it a lot rin as parents when i give back kahit gaano kaliit.!
Kung nasa 20's ka pa lang, wala. Pero pag mid 30's ka na alam mo na may cons din ang pagiging childfree.
I know naman na gusto natin patunayan na tamang ang decision ng bawat isa, pero di lahat ng tao pare pareho ang gusto sa buhay.
I have a child, yes, and sobrang masaya ako hahaha.
Goodluck sa inyo mga childfree and I'm actually happy na nagiging responsible na ang mga tao sa pinas, pero kung mag bago man decision niyo later in life, all good parin.
The challenge for me is not knowing if a decision you take when you are younger (like not having kids) is something I would regret later on when it's basically too late.
Cons:
yung mga relatives mo na ijjudge ka
di ko maipapasa yung ganda ko lol
Hahahahah but then again ayoko na din ipasa yung mental issues ko at panget na genes healthwise so it evens out
I have a 3 year old na sobrang kulit, and from where Im standing right now, the cons would be not being able to experience the things I had experienced with her. The small moments na nag lalambing sya, yung mga funny and quirky things na sinasabi nya. And I would miss out seeing who she will be one day.
I have always wanted a family of my own, so there's that. But I also think na mahiram mag define ng cons of not having kids without experincing it.
Experiencing life all over again through the eyes of a child is absolutely fascinating and truly awesome and deathly frightening hahaha. I am already planning my family's first Disneyland trip (w/5 year old son) and I can't wait.
Cons : You will see one by one your friends are getting busy grooming their Children to the point that you realize you are alone, drinking alone, hiking alone, partying alone and etc.
You will see two types of answers here. Sasagot yung mga may anak na. On the other side, yung mga walang anak.
See, wala naman akong anak pero what is up with childfree people suddenly giving off a cult-ish vibe.
Mejo narrow-minded sumagot. “Walang cons ang hindi mag-aanak,” says the 25yo.
At least yung may mga anak na, hindi dismissive sumagot. Mindful sumagot. Hindi conclusive agad.
Actually mga ganyan opinion galing sa:
1.Walang anak na sobrang bata pa at di pa sumisipa yung mother's instinct
2.May anak na
3.Mga galing sa same sex couples o lgbtq
Ang dami kong kababata noon. Highschool, college, friends. Ayaw daw mag ka anak. Kesyo ganito ganyn. Pero nung nag 30s na halos lahat gusto na mag kaanak or may anak na.
In short, wag ka magtanong kung masarap ba lumipad sa mga ibong nasa pugad pa. Wag ka din magtanong sa penguin o ostrich na kahit kelan di makakalipad.
Easy to say “walang cons” til you’re 70 years old with no one around, I used to not want kids but damn just seeing my family be around, my father, my siblings, my nieces and nephews it just warms my heart and tbh it hurts to imagine me not having anyone around like that at an older age. No matter what achievement I get, it won’t feel the same without having your loved ones around. Now I want kids, soon I also want grandkids but I understand the economic situation of this world is not ideal for people who can barely afford their own needs let alone the needs of another but man… it inspires me to work and do my best to have an economic situation that favors me to raise another life with my future wife. I also agree those anti kids people do sound cultish lol.
True. Most are also not considering na when you grow old, dadami din ung mga sakit naten. What if one gets hit by a disease that would require regular treatment like dialysis or PT or chemo. Or what if brain damaging illness. Mabilis maubos ang pera sa mga treatment. Kahit magbayad ka pa ng magaalaga, it can only take you so far.
Tapos atleast may mga basis yung mga sagot nila and even gave real life examples to back up their claims, liban sa mga opinions lang ma walang evidence to back up their claims.
... meanwhile SOME redditors feel attacked and felt the need to prove that there's nothing wrong with their decision of not having kids....
Maybe this question was meant for people who have been childless for a significant amount of time and their perspectives.
Baka un pala OP found out he/she couldnt have her own kids despite wanting to have one.
The cons for people with children will most likely not be a con for someone who doesn't have/don't have plans of having a child. There's a reason they choose to not have kids. Di issue sa kanila yung walang magalaaga pag tanda, di attached sa pagkakaron ng anak purpose nila at fulfillment sa buhay, etc.
And this thread is full of people who are obviously on the side of pro-family. Halos walang actual discussion kundi puro apiran lang ng mga family-oriented.
The most con I can see is lack of companionship in general pero that's not really exclusive to childrenless elderly, minsan nga mas masakit pa kalungkutan ng may pamiilya pero pinabayaan. Every other "con" listed is for people who WANT to have children. What's a con for most might not be a con for others pero parang hirap mga tao dito intindihin yun.
At mas oozing yung superiority ng mga pamilyado na sa thread na to, ramdam mo yung smug feeling of having a bigger "purpose" and "fulfillment" daw kasi may anak lol
>At least yung may mga anak na, hindi dismissive sumagot.
Like this guy?
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskPH/comments/180wb0c/cons_of_having_no_kids/ka8mkkx/
Napaka "non dismissive" ng "Cons nyan loneliness. Nasasabi lang ng ilan ngayon na kaya nila walang anak thinking na di na talaga magbabago isip nila as if sure na sure na sila sa mangyayari sa kanila sa hinaharap." na statement no?
At least they're presenting a point whereas most young, clearly childless redditors commenting about how there are no cons in having no kids are being such smug douches about it. The saddest thing is that I completely expected it too.
Not having kids has a con only if you actually want to have kids. Naiisip ko lang talaga yung genes ko hahaha. Pero if you don’t want kids, I don’t think there’s a real con to not having them.
I have a kid btw because I wanted to raise my own bio kid (by myself, no dad in the picture).
If majority of the population decides not to have kids, Philippines will have an aging population like Japan. Less younger workers to replace the retiring ones.
The only cons are judgments and constant off hand comments you get sa family gatherings, etc. But mostly from matatanda naman nanggagaling. Other than that wala.
The feeling of emptiness.
Yun talaga masasabi ko na con. Kasi ang iba di naman cons kung di entitlement lang e.g. walang mag aalaga sayo pag tanda. Namatayan ako ng anak recently. Before I got pregnant I didn't want to have kids din but now that I experienced motherhood kahit saglit lang masasabi ko na gusto ko rin pala talaga. Takot lang ako.
dami ko nakikita na mawawalan ka ng a sense of purpose but that seems selfish to me. bakit need pa gumawa ng ibang tao sa sariling purpose lol. besides the society, the earth is literally dying. if tumanda ang anak mo ng 80 yrs old anong klaseng klima na kaya meron ang mundo non? anyway, cons is majority will have children pa rin. you need too source out pa a community na magkakaron ng same priority sayo which is not kids. yun lang tbh.
dapat talaga mag isip muna ang mga tao kung paano gagawing sustainable ang mundo para magtagal pa ang mga tao sa Earth. Masyadong exponential na ang growth ng population, hindi pa ba sapat yun? tapos diminishing na yung resources...
You be exhibiting fatherless behavior my guy. It's not selfish , may kanya kanya tayong purpose kung kpop purpose mo edi go there people be voicing out they answer pero ang tryhard ng sagot mo na too "lib" hurr durr society , earth is dying and climate change. Im voicing out my opinion as just as you voicing out your opinion in this question no need to attack others dahil mag kaiba kayo ng purpose ,yun lang thats it.
Kaya kung magkakaroon ng isang anak, make sure na palakihin ito nang maayos para mabawasan ang shittiness ng mundo (future).
Kung walang balak magkaanak (which is ok lang din), tumulong din para mabawasan ang shittiness ng mundo (future).
Hindi naman actual con pero tingin ko down the road some people regret not having one. I have 2 kids right now, and still aiming for another one. Sa akin lang, iba ang joy na dala at naibibigay ng anak mo sayo. Although i respect other people's choice of not having children. Iba iba lang talaga stance ng tao, and that's okay. Hindi mali ang ayaw magka anak. Hindi mali ang gusto magka anak. :)
Another thing na naiisip ko is if alam mo naman na good person ka with healthy family background, and good values, and financially well ka naman, you might be robbing the world of potential good people being born. If may generational traumas naman, you can always be the catalyst of breaking that trauma by providing a better and healthier environment for your children.
The extra motivation to do good and leave the world a bit better is also a pro for me. I always tried to be a good citizen of the world, but it is easy to get jaded and lose hope as you get older. Knowing my kid will feel the effects of our political decisions in 20 years gets me to those polls and town halls.
People perceive having a child as a choice. Though that is valid since we're on number crunching inflation, if you have a choice to have one and still you don't want to, you're either incompetent or immature to raise a child and that's fine.
The major con, you (and your partner) will be alone. Don't get me wrong. You can have friends, relatives and someone special to be with. But a relationship with your child is more profound than any relationship you could have ever think of. Do you think your friends, relatives will always be there for you when you grow old? You think they will take care of you? I don't think so. But your child, if you took care of them, you can be assured that someone with always be there for you.
Also, imagine seeing your son/daughter. Guiding him/her through life and teaching him/her lessons. Making them to be a testament of your life, a reflection of what you can do as an elder. If you can imagine not experiencing that, then this will not be a con for you, at least for now.
Matthew Perry kind of death.
Skl may tita ako walang anak then by 46 years old nagampon sya.
If you are going to be childless, you must look for childless community too. Para same wave length kayo.
Iba ang connection ng community ng mga parents.
Same my 48y.o tita who’s at the peek of her career and became rich na na opted to pay for my college tuition and asked me to stay at her house. I think she’s much more happier and we bond a lot rin.
Iba kasi tlaga ung bond with family than friends
I have a 1 year old, pero siguro if wala pa akong anak ngayon, baka di na ako mag attend ng reunion o masapak ko iyong mga kamaganak kong tanong ng tanong if kailan ako magaasawa o magkaka anak lol
You will never have an apo of your own? You know, the chance of having small version of your kids without financial obligations and physical challenges.
they just need a certain # of births so that the ~~pyramiding scheme~~ social security benefits, gsis, pagibig, philhealth dont fall down like a house of cards
That's what other countries also said. Look at them right now, they are struggling to increase their birth rate, and there is a high chance of economic collapse in the near/far future.
Look, I am one of those people that don't want to have a kid/s. But to be realistic, there's an economic implication of low to zero birth rates.
Cons according to my dad: No feeling of purpose.
My dad always told me na he felt like he each time he reached a new goal in life, he still felt directionless until he had me and my siblings. Now, he feels super fulfilled just with us being there. I won’t really understand the feeling until I get kids of my own daw 🤣
Oo nga, i think eto yung pinaka essence ng pagbuo ng sariling pamilya. Meron talagang selfless na tao na mas fulfilled kapag nag effort sila para sa iba.
I like this one. I don't want to have a child pero nung inalagaan ko yung pamangkin ko during the pandemic feeling ko nagka-purpose yung paggising ko bawat umaga. I wake up earlier than usual habang tulog pa sya para magluto ng kakainin nya kahit di ako taong kusina and scheduled lahat ng gagawin namin for a day. My life is usually bland and I go with the flow lang kaya I enjoyed taking care of my niece pero sobrang hirap ding mag-alaga ng bata lalo na pag di sayo lumaki 😅
Naisip ko rin ito sometimes ee, alam naman nating mas malaki yung chance na hindi tayo ang main character in this world (HAHAHAH)
so a realistic way to be fulfilled, if di man kayang matupad ang dream to be a famous world-renowned artist (joke), ay to have kids. Done right ha, andun pa rin kasi yung risk na they grow up resenting you 🫠
So idk, is it worth the risk pa rin ang tanong ko in the end hahaha
My grandmother has 5 kids and she died around 2 years ago. Her children love her very dearly, especially my father. My grandmother started to show signs of dementia probably 8 years ago. My father was dedicated in taking care of her.
When my grandmother was still mobile, my father would take her outside so she could get exercise. He would also bring her to her remaining relatives so she would visit them.
When my grandmother started to lose her memory, my father wrote and printed out a family book of sorts. It had pictures of my grandmother's family, children, and grandchildren. It had stories about each and everyone of them.
When my grandmother was unable to speak, my father would feed her and take care of her. It even reached a point where the food my grandmother took were processed through a blender so my grandmother wouldn't choke on the solid food.
And when my grandmother was finally hospitalized for a month during the pandemic, my father would send Foodpanda for the nurses every night for their dinner. This was for the hopes that they would take care of my grandmother extra carefully.
You can say that you can pay for someone to take care of you when you grow old and you don't have children. But I bet you all the money in the world that you will not receive the same kind/amount of dedication, love, and care as my father gave to her mother.
I agree. Even if you can afford to pay the person who will take care of us but they are only there because of money and they will not care if you are not breathing anymore because you are alone and they just dont care. Its like you are a king and all your words are law but once you died you are no longer a king and they can break your laws.
This is actually a good pros of having kids. But the thing is it should remain a side effect of love and care, and not something too-expected or not something akin to a forced obligation. Kasi anything pilit or peer-pressured may not be as genuine.
That's also not a hundred percent guarantee for this scenario. One's adult children could die before they do, or be caught up with their own big family or hectic work, etc.
And tbf, I know people who have big emotions in general, who can give familial love and care to people who aren't blood-related to them, even if only a few months has passed since meeting. I'm aware not everyone can do that. But they are there.
Edit: grammar
Ah definitely. Having children is not a guarantee that this will be the case. I'd actually argue that majority of the time, this will not be the case. But that is for another day. Hehe
I hope she felt all the love from the people around her. I suspect that towards the end of her life, she couldn't because of her dementia. And as much as it is sad, I know that part of what my father did for her mother, he did for himself as well.
That’s nice. Your grandmother probably was a good person.
My mom is still slaving away taking care of her mother. She got unlucky and was set up to care for her mom. No other relatives wanted to care for her because our grandmother is narcissist through and through and dementia makes this worst. I wish for her to die every single day. 😒
As someone who has witnessed the effects of dementia on people and its effects on the people around them, I completely understand where you are coming from with your last sentence.
And even if it is as clear as day that you are wishing for someone to die, I believe that is not coming from malice.
As people have mentioned here, people not having children is not a guarantee that nobody will love you and take care of you like my father did for his mother. But certainly, having children is also not a guarantee that they will love you and take care of you as well.
I agree dito, kasi yung kapatid ni Hubby ko single man. Although, oo marami sya pera and yung baby ko (pamangkin nya) for sure will treat him dearly and well pero kung nasa ospital daddy nya at tito nya, for sure daddy nya ang pupuntahan nya..
kaya mejo torn ako sa argument ng kids vs no kids. Definitely may pros and cons sya talaga.
It only edifies your narcissism and sociopathy. Why make a kid? To make a human in your own image or ego. Put them in harms way for your own pride. It’s all about you. Social norms, obligations, pleasing parents, Not the kid. Just you. The kid doesn’t even exist yet, so don’t be selfish.
Did she ever go to a hospital? They coulda helped.
Kaya sana if ever magkaroon ako ng kids sana they will love me unconditionally hindi dahil sa mana ang habol if ever haha sa buhaya naman talaga theres always pros and cons. Mamili lang tayo ano mas prefer natin😊
Deprivation of responsibility - necessity for maturity. You don't get to experience "peak" of life if you're not driven by purpose. Missing this unique relationship. Your level of maturity will not be the same as having someone so important in your life. (I can't imagine myself having no kids at the age of 45, things get uninteresting when you age.)
The moment relatives (especially the older ones) find out that it's an intentional decision (not related to health), you will be questioned/criticized for the rest of your lives.
I feel like same with living. parang puro cons mabuhay pero worth parin Naman kahit paminsan Minsan napapaisip Ako na ndi tlga worth. Pero may mga bagay na napapasabi Ako na worth sya. I think same with having a child. Mafefeel mo lng once na experience mo na. Iba Kasi yung alam mo lng vs nafefeel mo tlga and youre living it
Let’s not put everything in pros and cons because I would never tell my kid (if I had one) that I would rather have a comfortable lifestyle than having him or her. Here is what I see the value of having a kid: 1.) The beauty of birth - It is no surprise that there is no experience like seeing what was part of you come to life. That glowing bundle of joy can make any grown man cry. It is probably by (God’s Design) the nature of our species that we love our offsprings, as they represent the culmination of our experiences that led to this moment. 2.) Learning from fresh eyes - As new parents, they’ll take on challenges most probably that they didn’t expect. From sleepless nights to going way over budget. These problems can be resolved through proper planning and thorough execution but the most difficult role of a parent is what they want their child to be. Sometimes it is difficult to tell, I mean it can barely speak! Yet it is important to make him or her try new things and and see how they react to the world. From there you might learn a thing or two they might share with you. 3.) Emotional Rollercoasters - This is probably THE REASON why I would want a kid because they are a source of feelings. Did my kid just spoke the longest English word? I will clap with joy for him. Did my kid fell on his bike? What a dumbass, welp… gotta go help him. Did my kid had his first break up? I would thank him for telling me about it. I mean how on earth would you not like having your own k-drama show in front of you, it is entertaining, 4.) Ambitions and Aspirations - This is where my kid is finally having his first year in college. I probably pushed him to do a specific course, but he made his choice clear and wanted whatever he chose. And I would fully support it anyway. He makes his new experiences and becomes inevitably more independent. His actions will be a reflection of how I raised him. I really wished I did right. I will wish him all the best. There, I would probably pursue my own hobby or travel with my wife. 5.) Death and Meaning - This will happen in 60’s and beyond and I can never imagine it but, if I ever reach point where I will reminisce my life, I want to make sure that every choice I made was made out of intention not out of accident or regret. And my children will be one of my pride and joys of being alive in this world.
Trivial, but if you adore the cuteness of children, that might certainly be a lack in your life unless you work in daycare.
The assumption in this thread is that you're going to have delightful kids. That's not always the case. So for me having kids is neutral in that aspect. You get a good kid - positive. Some people will get kids who become drug addicts - negative. Passing on the genes as the sole reason is a selfish reason to have kids IMO.
Wala talaga akong planong mag-anak eversince. Kasi nakatatak na sa utak ko na ako ang bubuhay sa pamangkin, magulang, kapatid at apo ko. Parang nakaset na yung ganong mindset sakin. I was supposed to go abroad para magwork para sa future ng pamilya ko but I got pregnant. It changed me. It made me happy. It gave me hope. Actually OP ang layo ng sagot ko sa tanong mo pero nung nagkaanak ako tsaka ko lang narealize yung mga bagay-bagay. To achieve more and dream big hindi na para sa mga gumamit lang sakin kundi para na sa sarili kong pamilya. I stopped sending money and supporting my siblings etc. tapos dun ko nalaman totoo nilang ugali. Siniraan online. Nakatanggap ng death threats. In short, lumabas totoong kulay. Ngayon, I was able to secure my own fam in our own house and lahat ng needs at wants ng anak ko nabibigay ko. I dedicate my life to my child because she gave me hope that I deserve better.
I love this thread!!! Hindi maipaliwanag ang cons, sa sandamakmak na hirap pagdadaanan mo pag may anak ka pero grabe un feeling kase pag may anak ka, just one smile and hug from those little monsters, life became so easy sometimes ..
Sa opinion ko lang ah masaya lang walang anak pag bata at attractive ka pa ...
Walang tagapagmana ng yaman
Having someone who was once a zygote in an ultrasound film saying “I love you, daddy” is priceless. Tears me up all the time. Every day is a miracle when you are a parent.
Cons would be: -Having too much freetime -Having less significant additional stress -Being able to save money -Being able to travel -Being able to sleep -Not being worried about making enough money to support them -Not being worried about keeping an entire human being safe and sound and fed -Freedom -You'll likely end up having hobbies or collections because they won't get destroyed by your kids -You'll probably have to deal with your house being clean since it's not gonna get trashed randomly every day -Probably end up with more money than you know what to do with since you won't have to worry about paying their tuition -You might end up with too many hobbies and accidentally start making money off them -You won't get to experience the teen angst phase or even better, having a daughter and dealing with boys etc If you're not really into these things then definitely have kids
I have never seen a love so pure as that of my baby’s whenever we have our cuddle time. Ang cliche and ang selfish man pakinggan pero totoong mahal na mahal ko yung anak ko tapos ibang feeling pag alam mo din na may maliit na taong nagmamahal sayo. Ang sarap. Nakakatakot yung responsibility, oo. Pero grabe yung sarap sa pakiramdam. Nakakaiyak.
I believe it depends on whether you would want your genes/properties/possessions or anything material passed on to the next generation cause in my opinion, if you find yourself enough, and you don't want to have any mark left in the world then why even have kids at all? People would usually say that you should have kids in order to have someone take care of you when you're old but let's be honest here, most of the time, the elderly are just left in nursing homes, or would instead be burdened by the growing families of their sons/daughters.
None
There are no cons if someone doesn't want kids in the first place 👌👌👌 A personal con for me would be not experiencing parenthood.
There are no cons.
If you are happy with a pet I’m 100% sure you will be happy with having your own child. Imagine a pet that you can teach, can talk, looks like you, wash the dishes, get a profession, out grow you, help you out when your old. Compared to that dog that only eat and shit. Cons: same as a pet, it drains your resources and you love it more than yourself
I'm not into having kids with my fiancee before now my wife, pero naisip namin na I will inherit properties with my parents sa province. So ang cons baka mapilitan ako ibenta lahat and hindi ko naman madadala sa hukay ang kayamanan kaya sa unico hijo ko na lang lol.
My tita is now around 54 or 55 years old. Na-discourage siyang mag asawa because of family history. She was more than willing to help her nephews and nieces, like me. I just graduated from college and syempre, gusto kong lumipad para makapagtrabaho. But most of the times, I worry na what if magkasakit siya, walang mag aalaga.
Cons: you will never experience the joy of being a mother/father.
Perks di magastos walang responsibility masyado. Pag my anak ka focus ka talaga sa goal dapat handa sa responsibility bilang parents para ma supportahan ang anak. Kong mababa pasensya wag na mag anak kawawa lang ang bata. Cons depende sa tao walang companion pag tanda wala kang makikitang progress like yon anak mo nakita mo lumaki gang mag asawa at napalaki ng maayos. The rest is depende sa tao ang cons. As a parents very fulfilling na nakikita ang anak ko lumalaki ng maayos
I have a 2 year old which takes extra time, sacrifice, effort and care. Dagdag sa responsibilities. BUT without her i think all i would feel are the stresses of life and work which will be there whether i had a child or not. She brings me joy.
There will be experiences that one will never know if they decide to not have kids. Sure, we are all familiar with the hardships of raising kids, but there are also events that only parents can fully appreciate. Seeing your child for the first time is a weird but overwhelmingly joyous experience. Holding your child for the first time feels amazing yet scary, as you fear that you might be holding the baby wrong. All the milestones that a child reaches; their first word, their first step, calling you "papa" or "dada" for the first time, and many more, are things that you celebrate even though they are simply things that babies do as they grow up. My child hasn't reached this point yet, but I look forward to seeing her take her first steps in school, successfully count 1-10, and maybe get her first "outstanding star." Being a parent means you will usually be the first witness to your child's growth and, for me at least, this is the best feeling ever.
Minsan ka lang mabubuhay sa mundo. Kumpletohin mo yung experience. Ako noong binata pa ako napaka walang direksyon ng buhay ko. Wala akong pake sa kahit ano. Kahit sa magulang ko pa. Nag rerebelde ako. Pero nung nag ka anak ako, naintindihan ko lahat. Naintindihan ko mga decision ng parents ko tama man o mali. Nagkaron ako ng drive mag work di yung kung kelan at san ko lang gusto tas bahala na kung wala. Di ko sinasabe na sapat na reason yun mag anak pero kung nag mamahalan naman kayo ng asawa mo at kaya nyo bumuhay ng isa pang tao e why not. Ibang saya ang makita yung mukha ng anak mo paglabas ng delivery room. Ang sarap ng feeling mabili yung laruan na gustonng gusto ng anak mo at pinag ipunan mo. Ang sarap na isurprise sila ng pasalubong galing work tapos magugulat sila may dala kang jollibee. Nakakapagod. Magastos. Pero masarap magkaanak kung may pera ka. Pag namatay ka. Wala nang round 2. Na sa susunod na round, gusto mo naman mag ka anak. Walang ganon. Kaya isipin mo ano ba talaga pumipigil sanyo.
No instant retirement fund. 😂
Napakabuting anak ng father mo and I'm sure napakabuti ding nanay ng lola mo... Sana ganyan din mga anak ko sakin.
Sasabihan kang matandang dalaga or binata.
no heirs
Walang bibisita sa puntod mo. Tutubuan na ng damo pagkalipas ng ilang taon
walang sasama sayo hangang sa mamatay ka nalang kelangan mo pa maghanap ng kasama sa kapitbahay mo kung sino pwede sumama sayo sa ospital
Being child-free allows you freedom without limitations. Having a child means thinking of something bigger and better for someone other than yourself. It makes you want to live your life—not for hedonistic pursuits, but for your son or daughter. I have an eight-month-old, and I’ll be honest, parenting is a thankless job. I don’t blame young people who don’t want kids. A child-free lifestyle is pretty much like living out your teenage years but with the financial capacity to do, buy, and experience the things you want this time around. I, too, had wanted a child-free lifestyle. But I have a son, and if there’s one thing I have noticed about myself, it’s wanting to be a better mother for him. I used to smoke, and I would have continued to do so had it not been for my little boy. But now, I am no longer living my life just for me…but for him too. Quitting was difficult, but getting to see my son grow up, have his own experiences, and living to witness all of that make it worth it. Because I want to see all that, I have another reason to live.
When you get old it will get very very lonely.
I imagine it has a lot of hardy lessons a person can’t learn if not for being a parent. Missing out on those life lessons/experiences can be considered a con by some.
Walang investment
Making goods has become faster and cheaper. But why is the cost of things going up? But why is everything around us falling apart? Elders? Are you sure they know? Lol i bet most of them fell for the covid19 bullshit which ironically is killing people more than the virus itself. Life is too toxic, if only people knew how much toxins you have around you. These can affect our mind, body and soul. Misery loves company.
uhm solong solo mo yung miserableng buhay HAHAHHAH
Walang kang mauutusan kumuha ng tubig pag uugod ugod ka na lol kidding! Ung alaga mong aso or pusa di mo sila mauutusan dalhan ka ng tubig or utusan mo bumili sa tindahan haha mahirap magka anak , pero sobrang thankful ako nagka anak ako maaga kase ngaun he is helping me in small things kase nawalan na kami ng yaya.. tas ang sarap ng may nag sasabi sayo ‘Mommy I love your cooking ‘ Mommy you are the best in this world’ mga ganun.. wag kayong masyadong selfish and matakot mgkaanak. Masarap pa rin may nag titingin tingin sau habang tumatanda tau.
cons - never knowing the feeling of having one
No one will avenge me 😂😂😂
The different feeling of purpose in life. Yung bumabangon ka para humarap sa challenges ng Buhay hinde para sa sarili mo lang. Kundi para na din sa anak ko. Nung single Ako at walang anak feeling ko walang purpose Yung mga ginagawa ko.
Perspective of someone young who has no kids: none. Some parents forget that kids did not choose to be born. Sa kakalimutan nito ginagawang cash cow o scapegoat mga anak. I think society just really pressures people to have children. (Take this with a grain of salt, after all my opinion might change overtime).
Most of the comments I see here are about not having anyone to take care of them, anyone to pass on their belongings/learning to, or anyone to remember them when they're gone — which I think are pretty much self-serving. I don't think there's a real con in having no children. I'm a 25 year-old single woman and the thought of having a kid of my own has never crossed my mind yet and I don't feel bothered by these said cons. I believe I can always adopt and take care of a child who's already there needing someone to look after them. Giving birth and rearing a child are difficult jobs especially for a woman, so I beg to differ when people say a childless life would not be as fulfilling as having one. It still depends on how you manage your life and how you divert from the social norms and culture. As for myself, I don't feel the need to nurture someone just to have them as my personal caregiver on my dying days. There are plenty of genuine relationships you can get fulfillment from that doesn't involve a lot of pain and sacrifice. I'm not empty, I'm just being realistic.
Generally all the parents that have kid/s will say being a parent is one of the best thing that happened to them. Even parents who previously said they did not want kids because of responsibilities, etc, etc, etc, they will generally say it is still the best thing that happened to them. The feeling of simple hug from your kid/s is priceless. The feeling cannot be replicated by my dog. Good thing is you will never learn what you will miss in life if you will never have a kid. My suggestion is to have kids if you can. It ain't easy but it's damn worth it.
Walang CONS kung ayaw o wala ka talagang planong mag-anak. Simple as that.
Hehe actually, i have no kids nor do i plan on having it. I have a mental illness na nasa borderline severe na. I take high dosages of medication na to keep the voices in my head, the emotional turmoil & anxiety at bay. Nakita ko na dn ung downsides para sa bata for i have seen examples of those the serious mental illnesses na like schizo or psychopath/sociopaths and narcisissists. Nananakit ng bata kasi yung temper di ma-control. Tapos btw, lahat ng nagiging anak nila meron din halos pareho din na traits. Lilipat pa yun sa 3rd generation kasi kahit ung mga apo, malaki pa dn yung chance. Ganun ka-potent ung genetic illness na mga ganun. So di lahat ng nandto eh "di mahal ng magulang" nila. In fact, masyado nilang mahal ang mga bata na they're better off not making them.
Wala kang retirment fund. /s
Dead Bloodline You wont be able to pass down knowledge and values that makes the world a better place. (considering you have both wisdom and values yourself, assuming reddit people are not the same as twitter people) To some people, its a life full filling moment and journey when they guided their offsprings to greatness. if not greatness then just guiding their offsprings to a better life than they have. Its a very difficult task but a rewarding one if you succeeded at being a parent and has guided your kids to the right path, Thats why I dont plan on being a parent yet cause I still hang out on reddit.
Single, no kid millennial here (who wants to have kids RESPONSIBLY) Yung replies nung mga anti kids kasi here rooting madalas sa irresponsible and undeserving parents. Blocked na talaga yung ‘cons’ part sa kanila no matter what. Understandable. I feel like if malaking portion ng parents nag-assess muna ng mga sarili bago nagsipag anak (with that I meant financially, emotionally, mentally, and SPIRITUALLY good ba sila to be one) millions of reply na siguro tong thread dahil life will be worth living na 🤷♀️ But to answer: Walang maglilibing sayo unless you have siblings or very close younger relatives. I’m only child and one of my very last wishes in this lifetime e mailibing ako ng mga magiging anak ko 💛
Siguro malungkot kasi parang andun yung idea na magisa ka sa buhay lalo na pag kasal ka na pero walang anak kasi naging angel na yung partner mo... In fact, as the eldest child na laging inuutusan magbantay at alaga sa younger sibs, I thought about not having my own kids in the future but my father would always say na mas masaya talaga kapag madaming anak kahit na dumanas ng hirap. Ineexample pa niya yung mga kakilala namin na namamatayan kasi pag namatay daw yung magulang, kakaiba yung pakiramdam pag atleast madami kang kasama na kapatid sa lamay. Kahit maiwan ka, may makakasama ka.
You wont experience having grandchildren from your genes
literally nothing.
I think wala namang cons if you choose not to have kids. It's just missing out one part of life and it should not be frowned upon kasi choice yun nung couple/person, and I think in some way masasabi din naten na they are being responsible for their own reasons since today, child birth, milk and food, education, all expensive, or they just want to travel, go out, have a good night sleep, at the back of their mind they don't want kids, because if they had a child and became shitty parents because they can't provide then kawawa din naman yung bata. For me, a father of a 4-year-old, though I miss things like traveling and buying things for myself, I do not regret my choice. To those couples/people who want and to do those who don't want, let's just agree to disagree and respect each other's choices and don't be an ass about it. PS. If you are a parent and totorturin mo yung anak mo na paglaki nila ay utang na loob nila and buhay nila sa inyo, you should burn in hell.
Walang mautusan na bumili ng toyo and/or suka.
Cons can be assessed in different perspectives (which does not absolutely apply to all circumstances and people): Personal and Intimate: 1. There is no concrete and long-term need for two partners to keep their intimate relationship. We can say having no kids eliminated a vital need for progress from a romantic-sexual dynamic into a more or less intimate form inclusive of other people outside the relationship. 2. Humans physically, mentally and emotionally peak through adulthood before regressing a little bit through old age. Having kids provide a guarantee of a capable adult in the future to take care of you. Social: 1. As much as society can be judgmental and superficial, having a kid provides an opportunity to pass on your ideals into the future with another human being. 2. Kids also provide an "anchor" of sorts to socially reconnect to the outside world beyond work. Economic: 1. This might be a cruel fact since I don't know how to rephrase it but having kids increases the chance of economic prosperity in the future and decreases the possibility of an economic collapse (e.g. Japan, China, many EU countries) Pero, CMV.
Thinking of having kids as "pros and cons" is the wrong way to look at it. They are not objects that you are trying to get utility from.
There is a kind of wisdom, maturity, and deep abiding love good parents reap that child-free people will never have a chance to gain. Because being good parents require so much sacrifice - a kind of sacrifice that build depth of character - that those without kids can never even imagine. It can be like a wonderful land of adventures that those without kids can never get to. And those who have been to that land cannot describe adequately. You have to be a good parent to experience this side of your humanity. Haist hirap mag explain! Me I have three kids and I know they unlocked the best version of me.
[Kurzgesagt video](https://youtu.be/LBudghsdByQ) on the matter with perspectives from an economical and societal standpoint, as well as some history. Imo from the sentiments I read, generally it's the following: 1. Regrets from women who waited for too long and now have trouble conceiving. It also increases the chance of birth defects. 2. Your ideology, whatever it may be, is harder to pass. Your expertise, trade, knowledge such as secret recipes, family businesses, cultural traditions etc. might end with you too. Having no kids will always result in a net neutral to net positive in terms of personal resources. But the value of ***emotional fulfillment*** and ***parental pride*** is subjective and can only be felt when you are in that moment. *It isn't even guaranteed.* To those who experienced it they might say "it's the greatest thing they ever experienced", but to those who don't, it doesn't mean jackshit.
mdaming tao ung ggawin ice breaker ung pag convince sayo na mag anak ka na tapos sabay utang, kasi daw ung anak niya ganto ganyan etc.
Magsasara yung school like Japan
You will never experience the joy and unconditional love of a child.
From someone na walang balak magka-anak as of now (might change my mind sa future) is probably yung yet to exist bond. Like bond with my s/o is enough for me pero I can’t help but think what would it feel if may +1 pa samin. Also, might get downvoted for this but the typical “sayang lahi” especially if good genes hahahah can’t relate tho, kahit wala na sumunod sakin since di naman special HAHAHA
If you are a giver and have no kid, I guess you lose the satisfaction of giving everything you have to your kid. Riches, knowledge, wisdom, manners, culture, love. When you are old and rich, wealth means nothing if I have no loved one to leave it to.
Walang cons
I really cant think of any. Thats why i choose this life
Cons: You'll die alone and lonely
Paying more taxes.
My husband and I have been DINKs for 4 years before we chose to have a child. Our child is 6 yrs old now and tbh, I wonder what life would have been if I’ve never known such a human being. This is not even yung OA. Na pag praise sa anak, it’s just that, masaya na kami ng husband ko with our cats, but having our son made our good life even more vibrant and just extra joyous. It’s a level na for 4 yrs as DINKs, we would have never experienced. So the con? Maybe just experiencing another awesome human being grow right before your eyes, without any expectation for them to give you back anything. I also don’t want him to grow up taking care of us kaya we are saving up and planning finances as well as investing in our mental and emotional well-being, so our son gets to experience and benefit from this.
I have a 2-yr old and nasa stage ngayon na sobrang challenging. He’s testing his boundaries (and rightfully so). You literally have your heart outside your body. Pag nakikita kong nag-aaakyat, nagtatatalon; minsan kung anu-ano talaga naiimagine kong mangyayari HAHA. It doesn’t sound so promising. Pero di ko rin naman mapigilan yung kurot sa puso when he smiles!! When he calls me Mama. When he wants me and his papa. When he wants our hugs and tells us he loves being with us. Hay my heart!!! Selfish naman talaga ang gustuhin magka-anak. It’s all for me — I have so much love to give kaya gusto ko ng anak kahit alam kong di naman na best ang world natin for kids. Kaya naman talagang binubuhusan ko ng pagmamahal at alaga at aral anak ko (and future kids pa hopefully) to make naman their lives worth-while. Yung kahit mahirap at masama na ang mundo ay babalutin sila ng pagmamahal naming mag-asawa.
being excluded from family events with kids or more like your friends with kids will likely make you more distant from each other because your topic are most likely different
Cons would be, wondering "if my kid will be as mindful as I am as a daughter". Hehe..we don't want kids. Maaga nabuntis ang sis ko and the kid literally grew up with us (me, my sis and my bro) alone. I have seen the struggles and I have felt the fulfillment at the same time. 16years later and the struggle is still there. I love my niece dearly but the today's era is just so stressful. I can't fathom the fact that my remaining years will be spent thinking about my child for the rest of my life. I understand the cons that no one will probably take care of me like how I am taking care of my parents but looking at my siblings now, they have no time taking care of my parents din naman eh kasi they have their own family to look after. Sure they can visit if they want (or if need to) pero still, they have their own lives to deal with and my parents are living on their own din naman eh. Pero sabi nga ng iba, depende na din kung pnu pinalaki ng parents yung mga anak nila, minsan kasi lalaki sila na aantayin lang magkasarili para maka takas sa parents or minsan naman mag aalaga din tlaga sila pag matanda ka na. You will never know what you will get talaga. Ewan. Hehe
You miss out on probably 1/4 of the human experience. To some, that’s fine.
May ka kilala lang ako na very successful siya matalino tas chemical engineer. Wala siyang asawa pati anak so parang nawawalan siya ng purpose daw sa life kaya tumigil mag work. Empty daw ang feeling
Para saan/kanino ka bumabangon? Ito lang itanong mo sa sarili mo 😁
No man is an island im saying na kahit may partner ka iba yung feeling nung kalinga ng anak, im not saying that make your child a retirement plan, pero iba paren syempre ang pagmamahal at pag aalalaga ng sarili mong kadugo unconditional love. Ang mawawala sayo (if ever)
My bloodline ends with me😅sayang ang genes
huhuhu gusto ko na ng anak
Walang cons haha! yung mga nagsasabing malungkot yung tumanda ng walang anak, gaano kayo ka-sure? baka sila lang nalulungkot para sa mga walang anak haha I have an older sister who's in her 50s na and she couldn't be any happier than not having kids.
There's really no cons to it. But if you're someone unsure about wanting a kid you'll have your own cons regarding the subject.
No one to sing those Disney lullabies to. Pets don't even pay attention to you when you sing them to sleep. Tapos, pag nairita pa sila sayo, kakalmutin ka pa.
Loneliness for some... maybe.
Depende, OP. If you're the type na ayaw mo talaga ng kids by choice and you're decided na, I think wala naman cons. Kung deep inside naman eh gusto mo talaga magkaroon ng anak, like another human being na gusto mong buhusan ng pagmamahal, pero na-pepressure ka sa mundo at gastusin, baka ang cons eh magkaroon ka ng regrets sa huli kasi nga gusto mo naman sana talaga.
No good morning smiles and daily cuddles that makes your heart jump.
Thought of this for a long time and eto magiging option ko: 1. Mag-ipon for a trip in Switzerland para sa assisted suicide 2. Mag-ipon ng malaking pera for a retirement community sa ibang bansa kasi WALA DITO 3. Dedicated myself to a lifelong commitment of helping others. So my life can have a PURPOSE. Maybe apply for UN kaya napapaisip ako magtuloy ng medical school so I can help kids in indigenous areas. They say that a child will change you, I dont believe that. Kasi kung totoo yan, edi sana walang fucked up kids sa mundo na nagrarant sa r/offmychest. I always think na magsisisi ako na di ako nag-anak, but everytime naaalala ko yung sinabi ng nanay ko sakin na mamatay na ako when I was a kid nawawala yung cons. Di naman porket may anak guaranteed na may magaalaga sayo pagtanda, dumuty ako sa ospital at ang dami dun may anak or worst iniiwan sa hospicio de san jose. Siguro you'll have the WHAT IFs and the loneliness which is why mahalaga na you have a purpose and you plan what to do with your life.
love this comment!
preach!
I think that you don't get to experience the joy of having someone (apart from your husband or your family) who genuinely loves you. Feeling ko ibang level ang love and care na mabibigay ng kids mo, even when you're old.
Sabi ng husband ko, not being able to see how your offspring will look like. Yun lang daw haha Pero for me, being alive and not being able to experience motherhood is the disadvantage itself. Pero respect to people who do not dream of becoming a mother, to each their own.
No true cons to this because it all boils to what you personally think is/are the downsides to having no kids. The only thing is with pinoy culture you will always get asked about it, that's the only "true" con.
Nothing so far for me… update kita pag meron na….
hindi uso home for the aged dito sa pinas so kahit ayaw man ng elderly people napipilitan silang umasa sa pamilya. not necessarily retirement plan agad ang anak but unless kaya mong magpaulan ng pera sa mga pamangkin/kamag-anak mo or unless may maipapamana ka na magpagkakakitaan nila, wag kang mag expect na may tutulong sayo sa pagtanda mo. and mahirap na nga magtiwala sa kamag-anak para swelduhan para magbantay or tumulong sayo, paano na lang if si mo kadugo
the experience
Cons of having no kids?None.We have to promote lesser population for the next generation. I wish I am a billionaire with NGO that can provide Free ligation + Cash benefits who will undergo procedure. (Zeke's plan \\ Attack on Titan) Ex: Since a lot of household breeds like rabbits in metro manila, i'll ask them to undergo ligation then i'll give cash.
Wala mag-aalaga sayo pagtumanda ka and your slowly dying from illness or old age. Then you die alone. This is happening in japan - ang daming cases na nangamoy yung condo kasi nabubulok na yung katawan ng matanda kasi wala nag aalaga If you plan to hire a caregiver naman, marami rin cases na manloloko yung caregiver Iba a pa rin na may pamilya mag aalaga sayo
none. puro pros lang lol
Senior citizens demographics will pile up bad for the world na mas madaming senior at konti yung younger generation, imagine nlng kung puro mttanda ma exhaust yung health care at social security. Walang mag mamana ng properties at wealth kung meron. Societal level yung naiisip ko. I would prefer yung decent couple na mag anak ng madami. Kaysa yung mga bsta bsta nlng nag aanak ng maling reason or circumstances. Ma over populate ng mga problematic people yung community like those kids na di mag aaral and into commiting crimes.. mas ddami sila kaysa sa mattinong tao..if you will become a parent you will want a better world for your kids which is great, you will become selfless. I dont know. I also watch podcast those people poor to multi millionaire they encourage strong family unit. Yun lng dw greatest contribution mo s mundo..if u raise kids well.. if you keep your bloodline you can timetravel. You already contribute to the future. If the kids have values that will last..
And younger generation will work hard para mapanatiling maayos ang pension ng mga seniors. Kung kaunti ang papalit sa younger generation now, they will still work hard beyond their senior years kasi hindi sapat ang pension. For example: Singapore, Japan, SoKor, Italy, France etc.
Well its happening to be honest EU, USA, Canada nag ppasok ng immigrants. They prefer yung may anak. Indian has healthy range of younger, working people, China Lie about their population and demographics..nag 1 child policy pa. At mas maraming males than females. I dont know if they can still push seniors na mag work. Give China 10 to 20 yrs. Lets see kung anong ggawin s Seniors nila. Japan and S. Korea are in critical situation pwede silang mawala in 100 plus yrs. I think khit developed countries citizen has long working hours, competitive environment they dont have time na mag anak at ayaw na din nila they experience mental health probs din. Plus some cultures nakka exp pa din ng domestic violence ksi they value male pa din. Dito sa Pilipinas those people who are having kids are in poverty they treat kids as lifeline...a chance to have better life in a future. I dont agree with this reason..but atleast if they love their kids and treated well. Its not impossible na some kids will prosper. Mas may chance pa yung developing countries to prosper as long maintained yung younger population in the future.
As a nurse, single grandparents at the age of 70-90 pass away alone. Syempre patay na rin most family members nya nun. Mga kapatid nya and mga anak ng kapatid nya may mga sariling buhay. Healthcare worker lang kasama nila when they pass away.
I guess if you don’t have a spouse, not having someone that’s obligated to care for you as you get older, but honestly I would NOT want one of my own children caring for me as I get older. That would make me so uncomfortable for many reasons
Kala ko alam ko na yung feeling ng true love nun naging kami ng asawa ko, pero nun pinanganak yun mga kids ko hayysss iba pala talaga ang feeling. Full circle of life moment. Iba yun experience. Di ko siguro mararanasan un kung wala kami anak.
can’t think of any atp in life. it probably depends person to person. anyway, having kids has its cons, as does not having any. you just have to make a choice about which cons you can live with.
There are no cons
Walang magmamana ng yaman namin ng asawa ko. Right now, my wife and I are contemplating naming our favorite niece as our heir if ever the time comes.
My mom keeps telling me na paano na daw ung generational wealth, sino daw papasahan. Sabi ko, di ka Sy na di ko kaya gastusin lahat yan. I plan to put up a dog shelter in our farm and leave it to a charity. Sell the building, houses and other stuff and live my best life and spend it all before I die. I don't see any cons coz whenever I spend half a day taking care of a child, I thank God I can return them to their parents after. I get this intense longing when I see a pup but I never get it with a baby.
The chance to add a good human being to the population, if you have the ability to raise one... Problem I see currently is that people who I know who are awesome, kind, smart, caring, and passionate about improving the world are choosing not to have kids while those who have questionable values have 5!
Not having kids is a trend in the internet pero once you bought the stuff you want and travelled to all the places. Life can get dull terrifyingly fast.
Number 1 thing that i kept seeing is that pagod raw etc. After nila mag 16ish years old they’re almost independent na. Not financially pero they start working at 23 years old naman. I used to not want kids. Pero when I started staying at my single rich successful tita’s place, I realized that I actually want 2 kids. Nakatira ako sa house with tita ko na walang anak. Wala siyang S/O. Pero mayaman siya. Successful sa career at maraming ipon. She reached the peek of her career at 38yo. Nag sstay ako dito kasi mas malapit sa college univ tsaka nakaka ease ng gastos ng parents ko (3 kami magkakapatid) she treats and spoils me as if anak nya ako she even paid for my tuition sa college. Ganun nya ako ka love hehe and i treat her like a mom rin by giving her handmade gifts I’ll give you the biggest con: lonely pag wala si S/O mo. Tahimik ung bahay. Pero rich/comfy ka. Lahat mabibili mo. Naikot nya nga buong europe pero travels are time constricted. Ung everyday life nya pag asa bahay tahimik pero may mga hobbies naman siya na marami. Wala ka rin mabibigyan or mapapagmahanan ng mga binili mo this lifetime. When you have money and experienced majority of the things you want. Life can get dull terrifyingly fast. Parang pag nakuha mo na mga gusto mo marrealize mo wala ka nang ibang purpose hangang mamatay ka. I gave my single tita a handmade crochet doll of her and she told me that it was the best gift she ever recieved in her life. Naka display pa sa living room and she brags to whoever comes in her house (mind you her co workers give her luxury bags, watches etc.) With my main family naman: As the eldest daughter: Mahal na mahal ko mom ko. She had me (eldest) at 26 which is early tsaka di pa siya financially stable nun. Ngayon super happy ng mom ko she’s thriving with her new business. And masaya mga gala namin kahit cheap thrills lang. Local travels lang or kahit sa mall lang with my younger siblings. Nakakatuwa kasi quirks ng each child. Maganda childhood ko with her and she super appreciates it pag may ginagawa ako for her and sa mga achievements ko sa life. Kala ng mga tao kasi hahaggard or bibigay mo buong buhay mo sa anak mo pero after they reach 15 they live their own lives na since sa school and friends na most of their time. Para kaming BFF ni mommy hehe. I started having a small buisness at 20 and nakakatuwa na nabibilhan ko siya ng cute clothes, desserts, shoes for my dad and some random stuffs rin. Nakakagaan sa loob magbigay sa parents and they seem to appreciate it a lot rin as parents when i give back kahit gaano kaliit.!
Kung nasa 20's ka pa lang, wala. Pero pag mid 30's ka na alam mo na may cons din ang pagiging childfree. I know naman na gusto natin patunayan na tamang ang decision ng bawat isa, pero di lahat ng tao pare pareho ang gusto sa buhay. I have a child, yes, and sobrang masaya ako hahaha. Goodluck sa inyo mga childfree and I'm actually happy na nagiging responsible na ang mga tao sa pinas, pero kung mag bago man decision niyo later in life, all good parin.
The challenge for me is not knowing if a decision you take when you are younger (like not having kids) is something I would regret later on when it's basically too late.
Cons: yung mga relatives mo na ijjudge ka di ko maipapasa yung ganda ko lol Hahahahah but then again ayoko na din ipasa yung mental issues ko at panget na genes healthwise so it evens out
I have a 3 year old na sobrang kulit, and from where Im standing right now, the cons would be not being able to experience the things I had experienced with her. The small moments na nag lalambing sya, yung mga funny and quirky things na sinasabi nya. And I would miss out seeing who she will be one day. I have always wanted a family of my own, so there's that. But I also think na mahiram mag define ng cons of not having kids without experincing it.
Experiencing life all over again through the eyes of a child is absolutely fascinating and truly awesome and deathly frightening hahaha. I am already planning my family's first Disneyland trip (w/5 year old son) and I can't wait.
walang mag-aalaga sayo pagtanda mo. /s
Except kung marami kang pera
Sino magmamana ng yaman?
Walang mautusan sa bahay CHZ
In a hundred years, we will be one with the earth (either as ash in soil or in a coffin 6 ft under) so this womt matter
Cons : You will see one by one your friends are getting busy grooming their Children to the point that you realize you are alone, drinking alone, hiking alone, partying alone and etc.
Up
As a good friend of mine said “May maglilibing na sa akin.” And I guess that’s all that matters for him when the time comes.
You will see two types of answers here. Sasagot yung mga may anak na. On the other side, yung mga walang anak. See, wala naman akong anak pero what is up with childfree people suddenly giving off a cult-ish vibe. Mejo narrow-minded sumagot. “Walang cons ang hindi mag-aanak,” says the 25yo. At least yung may mga anak na, hindi dismissive sumagot. Mindful sumagot. Hindi conclusive agad.
Was wondering the same thing. Sobrang kontra sa mga answers cause di raw valid con to them yun hahaha. Must have a chip on their shoulder lol.
Actually mga ganyan opinion galing sa: 1.Walang anak na sobrang bata pa at di pa sumisipa yung mother's instinct 2.May anak na 3.Mga galing sa same sex couples o lgbtq Ang dami kong kababata noon. Highschool, college, friends. Ayaw daw mag ka anak. Kesyo ganito ganyn. Pero nung nag 30s na halos lahat gusto na mag kaanak or may anak na. In short, wag ka magtanong kung masarap ba lumipad sa mga ibong nasa pugad pa. Wag ka din magtanong sa penguin o ostrich na kahit kelan di makakalipad.
Easy to say “walang cons” til you’re 70 years old with no one around, I used to not want kids but damn just seeing my family be around, my father, my siblings, my nieces and nephews it just warms my heart and tbh it hurts to imagine me not having anyone around like that at an older age. No matter what achievement I get, it won’t feel the same without having your loved ones around. Now I want kids, soon I also want grandkids but I understand the economic situation of this world is not ideal for people who can barely afford their own needs let alone the needs of another but man… it inspires me to work and do my best to have an economic situation that favors me to raise another life with my future wife. I also agree those anti kids people do sound cultish lol.
True. Most are also not considering na when you grow old, dadami din ung mga sakit naten. What if one gets hit by a disease that would require regular treatment like dialysis or PT or chemo. Or what if brain damaging illness. Mabilis maubos ang pera sa mga treatment. Kahit magbayad ka pa ng magaalaga, it can only take you so far.
Tapos atleast may mga basis yung mga sagot nila and even gave real life examples to back up their claims, liban sa mga opinions lang ma walang evidence to back up their claims. ... meanwhile SOME redditors feel attacked and felt the need to prove that there's nothing wrong with their decision of not having kids.... Maybe this question was meant for people who have been childless for a significant amount of time and their perspectives. Baka un pala OP found out he/she couldnt have her own kids despite wanting to have one.
The cons for people with children will most likely not be a con for someone who doesn't have/don't have plans of having a child. There's a reason they choose to not have kids. Di issue sa kanila yung walang magalaaga pag tanda, di attached sa pagkakaron ng anak purpose nila at fulfillment sa buhay, etc. And this thread is full of people who are obviously on the side of pro-family. Halos walang actual discussion kundi puro apiran lang ng mga family-oriented. The most con I can see is lack of companionship in general pero that's not really exclusive to childrenless elderly, minsan nga mas masakit pa kalungkutan ng may pamiilya pero pinabayaan. Every other "con" listed is for people who WANT to have children. What's a con for most might not be a con for others pero parang hirap mga tao dito intindihin yun. At mas oozing yung superiority ng mga pamilyado na sa thread na to, ramdam mo yung smug feeling of having a bigger "purpose" and "fulfillment" daw kasi may anak lol
>At least yung may mga anak na, hindi dismissive sumagot. Like this guy? https://www.reddit.com/r/AskPH/comments/180wb0c/cons_of_having_no_kids/ka8mkkx/ Napaka "non dismissive" ng "Cons nyan loneliness. Nasasabi lang ng ilan ngayon na kaya nila walang anak thinking na di na talaga magbabago isip nila as if sure na sure na sila sa mangyayari sa kanila sa hinaharap." na statement no?
At least they're presenting a point whereas most young, clearly childless redditors commenting about how there are no cons in having no kids are being such smug douches about it. The saddest thing is that I completely expected it too.
Noticed it too. 😅
End of bloodline. -Solong anak na lalake.
Not having kids has a con only if you actually want to have kids. Naiisip ko lang talaga yung genes ko hahaha. Pero if you don’t want kids, I don’t think there’s a real con to not having them. I have a kid btw because I wanted to raise my own bio kid (by myself, no dad in the picture).
Existential dread
Ndi mo magagamit ung SSS benefits for paid maternity leave
If majority of the population decides not to have kids, Philippines will have an aging population like Japan. Less younger workers to replace the retiring ones.
If you look at the numbers there are no cons, but you are giving away your money to banks when you die.
mas madami kang mabibiling lego at syempre yung parts ng sasakyan at motor
answers will be subjective. personally, i don't think of any 🫠
Ang nakikita ko lang cons.. walang magmamana ng mga ari-arian at kayamanan na pinaghirapan ko mag-isa 😂
The only cons are judgments and constant off hand comments you get sa family gatherings, etc. But mostly from matatanda naman nanggagaling. Other than that wala.
The feeling of emptiness. Yun talaga masasabi ko na con. Kasi ang iba di naman cons kung di entitlement lang e.g. walang mag aalaga sayo pag tanda. Namatayan ako ng anak recently. Before I got pregnant I didn't want to have kids din but now that I experienced motherhood kahit saglit lang masasabi ko na gusto ko rin pala talaga. Takot lang ako.
I think may ibang klaseng wisdom ang kayang ibigay ng parenthood, though optional siya at wala namang mawawala sayo kung di ka nagkaanak
dami ko nakikita na mawawalan ka ng a sense of purpose but that seems selfish to me. bakit need pa gumawa ng ibang tao sa sariling purpose lol. besides the society, the earth is literally dying. if tumanda ang anak mo ng 80 yrs old anong klaseng klima na kaya meron ang mundo non? anyway, cons is majority will have children pa rin. you need too source out pa a community na magkakaron ng same priority sayo which is not kids. yun lang tbh.
dapat talaga mag isip muna ang mga tao kung paano gagawing sustainable ang mundo para magtagal pa ang mga tao sa Earth. Masyadong exponential na ang growth ng population, hindi pa ba sapat yun? tapos diminishing na yung resources...
You be exhibiting fatherless behavior my guy. It's not selfish , may kanya kanya tayong purpose kung kpop purpose mo edi go there people be voicing out they answer pero ang tryhard ng sagot mo na too "lib" hurr durr society , earth is dying and climate change. Im voicing out my opinion as just as you voicing out your opinion in this question no need to attack others dahil mag kaiba kayo ng purpose ,yun lang thats it.
2023 na pang 2012 pa din edgy mo. 12 yrs old ka ba?
"the earth is literally dying" THIS. ngayon palang nga sobrang shitty na ng situations sa mundo, what more after 5-10 years.
Kaya kung magkakaroon ng isang anak, make sure na palakihin ito nang maayos para mabawasan ang shittiness ng mundo (future). Kung walang balak magkaanak (which is ok lang din), tumulong din para mabawasan ang shittiness ng mundo (future).
No legacy. Tapos may nanghihingi lagi kasi wala ka naman daw gastusin and probably may nagiintay na sa maiiwan mong properties 😂
Hindi naman actual con pero tingin ko down the road some people regret not having one. I have 2 kids right now, and still aiming for another one. Sa akin lang, iba ang joy na dala at naibibigay ng anak mo sayo. Although i respect other people's choice of not having children. Iba iba lang talaga stance ng tao, and that's okay. Hindi mali ang ayaw magka anak. Hindi mali ang gusto magka anak. :) Another thing na naiisip ko is if alam mo naman na good person ka with healthy family background, and good values, and financially well ka naman, you might be robbing the world of potential good people being born. If may generational traumas naman, you can always be the catalyst of breaking that trauma by providing a better and healthier environment for your children.
The extra motivation to do good and leave the world a bit better is also a pro for me. I always tried to be a good citizen of the world, but it is easy to get jaded and lose hope as you get older. Knowing my kid will feel the effects of our political decisions in 20 years gets me to those polls and town halls.
catcher in the rye
cons lang siguro is hindi dadami lahi ko. sayang ang ganda at talino AHAHAH
Wala ako nun so keri lang 🤣
Wala. Lol
No kids
People perceive having a child as a choice. Though that is valid since we're on number crunching inflation, if you have a choice to have one and still you don't want to, you're either incompetent or immature to raise a child and that's fine. The major con, you (and your partner) will be alone. Don't get me wrong. You can have friends, relatives and someone special to be with. But a relationship with your child is more profound than any relationship you could have ever think of. Do you think your friends, relatives will always be there for you when you grow old? You think they will take care of you? I don't think so. But your child, if you took care of them, you can be assured that someone with always be there for you. Also, imagine seeing your son/daughter. Guiding him/her through life and teaching him/her lessons. Making them to be a testament of your life, a reflection of what you can do as an elder. If you can imagine not experiencing that, then this will not be a con for you, at least for now.
you can't play in a playground built for kids, but it's allowed if you have a kid with you.
Matthew Perry kind of death. Skl may tita ako walang anak then by 46 years old nagampon sya. If you are going to be childless, you must look for childless community too. Para same wave length kayo. Iba ang connection ng community ng mga parents.
> Matthew Perry kind of death. Namatay yung lolo ng tropa ko a few weeks ago just like him. 8 na anak, 30 na apo.
Same my 48y.o tita who’s at the peek of her career and became rich na na opted to pay for my college tuition and asked me to stay at her house. I think she’s much more happier and we bond a lot rin. Iba kasi tlaga ung bond with family than friends
con in my case is yung pressure ng mga tao around me to have kids na. everytime may manganganak sasabihan ako na dapat ikaw na next
I have a 1 year old, pero siguro if wala pa akong anak ngayon, baka di na ako mag attend ng reunion o masapak ko iyong mga kamaganak kong tanong ng tanong if kailan ako magaasawa o magkaka anak lol
Palagi ka tatanungin ng mga losyang "bakit wala pa kayo anak" haahahahhaha
You will never have an apo of your own? You know, the chance of having small version of your kids without financial obligations and physical challenges.
In the long run, ECONOMICALLY on a country-scale, napakalaking CONS yung low to zero birth rate.
they just need a certain # of births so that the ~~pyramiding scheme~~ social security benefits, gsis, pagibig, philhealth dont fall down like a house of cards
The Philippines though… has enough children for the next fee decades lol
That's what other countries also said. Look at them right now, they are struggling to increase their birth rate, and there is a high chance of economic collapse in the near/far future. Look, I am one of those people that don't want to have a kid/s. But to be realistic, there's an economic implication of low to zero birth rates.
Cons according to my dad: No feeling of purpose. My dad always told me na he felt like he each time he reached a new goal in life, he still felt directionless until he had me and my siblings. Now, he feels super fulfilled just with us being there. I won’t really understand the feeling until I get kids of my own daw 🤣
Oo nga, i think eto yung pinaka essence ng pagbuo ng sariling pamilya. Meron talagang selfless na tao na mas fulfilled kapag nag effort sila para sa iba.
I like this one. I don't want to have a child pero nung inalagaan ko yung pamangkin ko during the pandemic feeling ko nagka-purpose yung paggising ko bawat umaga. I wake up earlier than usual habang tulog pa sya para magluto ng kakainin nya kahit di ako taong kusina and scheduled lahat ng gagawin namin for a day. My life is usually bland and I go with the flow lang kaya I enjoyed taking care of my niece pero sobrang hirap ding mag-alaga ng bata lalo na pag di sayo lumaki 😅
Naisip ko rin ito sometimes ee, alam naman nating mas malaki yung chance na hindi tayo ang main character in this world (HAHAHAH) so a realistic way to be fulfilled, if di man kayang matupad ang dream to be a famous world-renowned artist (joke), ay to have kids. Done right ha, andun pa rin kasi yung risk na they grow up resenting you 🫠 So idk, is it worth the risk pa rin ang tanong ko in the end hahaha
My grandmother has 5 kids and she died around 2 years ago. Her children love her very dearly, especially my father. My grandmother started to show signs of dementia probably 8 years ago. My father was dedicated in taking care of her. When my grandmother was still mobile, my father would take her outside so she could get exercise. He would also bring her to her remaining relatives so she would visit them. When my grandmother started to lose her memory, my father wrote and printed out a family book of sorts. It had pictures of my grandmother's family, children, and grandchildren. It had stories about each and everyone of them. When my grandmother was unable to speak, my father would feed her and take care of her. It even reached a point where the food my grandmother took were processed through a blender so my grandmother wouldn't choke on the solid food. And when my grandmother was finally hospitalized for a month during the pandemic, my father would send Foodpanda for the nurses every night for their dinner. This was for the hopes that they would take care of my grandmother extra carefully. You can say that you can pay for someone to take care of you when you grow old and you don't have children. But I bet you all the money in the world that you will not receive the same kind/amount of dedication, love, and care as my father gave to her mother.
I agree. Even if you can afford to pay the person who will take care of us but they are only there because of money and they will not care if you are not breathing anymore because you are alone and they just dont care. Its like you are a king and all your words are law but once you died you are no longer a king and they can break your laws.
Thank you for this. Spending time with my daughter now is like having a younger friend but of course with boundaries.
I hope that she continues to love spending time with you forever. :)
aww. That's so sweet. Sulitin every moment with her. Bilis ng panahon to be honest. She's turning 12 na.
Naku! Nung 12 ako, nag sisimula na akong mag individualize kaya sulitin niyo na po deadpool!
I am and I always will. She's a big fan of anything sonic now. I supported and buy her figures and plueshies once in a while.
This is actually a good pros of having kids. But the thing is it should remain a side effect of love and care, and not something too-expected or not something akin to a forced obligation. Kasi anything pilit or peer-pressured may not be as genuine. That's also not a hundred percent guarantee for this scenario. One's adult children could die before they do, or be caught up with their own big family or hectic work, etc. And tbf, I know people who have big emotions in general, who can give familial love and care to people who aren't blood-related to them, even if only a few months has passed since meeting. I'm aware not everyone can do that. But they are there. Edit: grammar
Ah definitely. Having children is not a guarantee that this will be the case. I'd actually argue that majority of the time, this will not be the case. But that is for another day. Hehe
The amount of feels you provided hit like a truck sir. Props to your grandma to have lived a very meaningful life full of love.
I hope she felt all the love from the people around her. I suspect that towards the end of her life, she couldn't because of her dementia. And as much as it is sad, I know that part of what my father did for her mother, he did for himself as well.
That’s nice. Your grandmother probably was a good person. My mom is still slaving away taking care of her mother. She got unlucky and was set up to care for her mom. No other relatives wanted to care for her because our grandmother is narcissist through and through and dementia makes this worst. I wish for her to die every single day. 😒
As someone who has witnessed the effects of dementia on people and its effects on the people around them, I completely understand where you are coming from with your last sentence. And even if it is as clear as day that you are wishing for someone to die, I believe that is not coming from malice.
as someone who will never have kids, i suddenly pity myself to this
As people have mentioned here, people not having children is not a guarantee that nobody will love you and take care of you like my father did for his mother. But certainly, having children is also not a guarantee that they will love you and take care of you as well.
I agree dito, kasi yung kapatid ni Hubby ko single man. Although, oo marami sya pera and yung baby ko (pamangkin nya) for sure will treat him dearly and well pero kung nasa ospital daddy nya at tito nya, for sure daddy nya ang pupuntahan nya.. kaya mejo torn ako sa argument ng kids vs no kids. Definitely may pros and cons sya talaga.