I did that but with lifesavers mints. Was quitting smoking and accidentally grabbed a huge pack of sugar free instead of the regular….. I never want to experience a minty fresh asshole ever again.
Maltitol is the worst. I have a horrible story to share. Unfortunately I did a year of Keto and went to the movies with my family, we stopped at this boutique candy shop on the way and I found sugar free caramels. Excellent right? No, not at all excellent. I ate a whole bag, just under 200g. Fortunately we were home before my stomach exploded out of my butt. I've never felt so bloated in my life and I'm sure I went down a dress size once the evacuation was complete. Never ever again.
i ate a package of sugar free cookies once with xylitol, another sugar substitute like malitol. i thought i had food poisoning.
it started with a rumbly tummy - you know the kind. not normal, definitely an omen of what may come. you immediately start doing a rewind of the past 24 hours and what you’ve put into your stomach. i’d had chicken the night before - was it that?
then the cramping. like doubled over cramping and knowing it’s gas but it it’s, like just in there. it’s so bad i considered going to the hospital because i’ve never felt anything like this and i’ve had ulcers.
i crawl to the toilet and as i’m shitting my guts out and sweating buckets onto the bathroom floor, i’m googling the ingredients of the cookies…
Omg, pull those up on Amazon and start reading the reviews. There were reviews that had me laughing so hard I was crying, couldn’t catch my breath no matter how hard I tried. Freaking hilarious!
🤣Lmao!!! I will absolutely do that! When I first discovered funny Amazon reviews I spent HOURS reading them. I remember there was one about a horse head mask that just absolutely killed me. Even just thinking about it now makes my cheeks hurt the way they did back them from all the smiling going on.
there was a guy who ate a small bag of those before he went through security at Toronto Pearson International Airport. He got flagged as suspicious by security people because he was sweating profusely and acting nervous, and when he went in for questioning he basically shit all over one of the officers LMAO
I was obsessed with these as a kid and my Nana would buy a full toilet paper roll size of them for me so they're really nostalgic!! I'm not sure I'd still enjoy them as much as I used to though.
Good and Fruity.
I personally think Good and Plenty is rat poison but that's because I hate anise and always have. But when I was a kid, Good and Fruity was the Red Licorice variant of that candy and they were quite tasty.
Problem is that at some point over the years they changed the recipe and now they're just disappointing Mike and Ikes that fail to justify their continued existence.
They're now selling their misprints as ones for awkward situationships. They legit even say they're their misprints. Not even trying to hide that they're just selling their stuff they'd normally throw away.
When I was like, 8. Our bus driver gave us bags of candy for Halloween.
Like pixie sticks, smarties, you know, candies that are similar to chalk in texture.
And an individual stick of sidewalk chalk.
So yah. Candy hearts taste like chalk with a hint of sugar.
What did they do to Butterfingers? Haven't had one in ages. If I had to guess without any context or hints I'd say eliminated palm oil or ditched hydrogenated oils.
The non chocolate covered butter fingers completely disappeared from my local boutique candy shops. The places that sell everything by the pound.
Love their grapefruit gummy wedges but COVID fucked whatever ingredient was needed for the peanut butter candy and it never got made again.
Butterfinger also started using barf inducing fake oils instead of cocoa butter. Not even legally chocolate anymore.
Okay, I fucking love peanut butter, so generally reeses products are my favorites; but I really feel like reeses pieces have become terrible. I have a memory of them being good, but they are definitely awful now and the last time I had some they made my stomach feel sick.
I’ve actually always felt like this about Reese’s pieces! They just have this weird oily fakeness that puts me off after eating just a few. I’ve always preferred peanut butter m&ms.
Grew up loving these. Just artificial banana flavor which is by the way the best artificial flavor ever made. My grandpa loved them so he would always get them and I grew to love them like that.
Fun fact, artificial banana flavoring is based on a banana that no longer exists(or last I knew of, it was extinct). So anytime you eat banana flavored candy, you're tasting Gros Michel bananas.
Don't they market it as tasting like soap? So I guess it's more something you buy as a novelty than because it tastes delicious, like buying ultra spicy potato chips
You should check out the various Scandinavian candies. All sorts of licorice flavors are very popular here. Sweet, salty, spicy, you name it! Google "lakrits" and try some of the options! One of my favorites is Djungelvrål ("jungle scream")
I’m the only one in my family who likes liquorice.
That was until my son came along. Turns out he likes liquorice as much as me. I’m not even mad I have to split all the liquorice with him now. I just buy twice as much 😎
One of my favorite memories is my Grandma telling my daughter she needs a Sugar Daddy 😂😂 she meant for her loose tooth, but all I could think about was the other meaning and I was just silently dying lol
Man this is the one that kills me. I LOVED butterfingers when I was a kid. They were far and away my favorite candy for a few long, formative childhood years.
But now? Every time I’ve given them another chance over the past few years have always ended in regret. I don’t know exactly what they did to the formula, but I KNOW this isn’t just a case of growing out of my tastes.
The texture, filling, the quality of the chocolate as well as the chocolate to bar ratio is all fucked up and they don’t break down properly. Once I start chewing they actually become the exact opposite of what the word “butterfingers” is because half the bar ends to sticking to my teeth indefinitely.
It’s just sad man. Fuck Nestle.
This thread has made me realize I love all candy. You can send all your candy corn and neccos and peeps to me. All of it!
Except wax candy like soda and wax lips. Nobody likes those and if you do, you're wrong
As an American, Hershey's chocolate. It is disgusting. We have access to so much better chocolate now and I have managed to turn my children into chocolate snobs lol
We have a really good friend from Denmark. Denmark is known for their licorice. We sent her a care package and included twizzlers as a joke. She was not amused. She still can’t believe that it is called licorice.
As a Dane that has also tried Twizzlers. She is absolutely correct.
Also factually. Licorice is a plant from which the taste derives. Twizzlers contain none of it. Real licorice does.
Also if my licorice isn’t covered in Ammonium Chloride, its basically just children’s sweets. Sweet sweet Salmiak.
I actually think that red vines taste like plastic, and prefer the strawberry twizzlers (though how it’s stored is important so it’s not hard). I noticed once I moved to the west coast it was more difficult to find twizzlers versus red vines too.
*ready to be downvoted to oblivion* lol
Black licorice. It tastes like what I would imagine an insole from a construction worker’s boot after a 60 hour work week in the middle of the summer in Arizona would taste like
True story, so a coworker has a Jelly Belly dispenser at work on her desk. I have a sweet tooth like no other, so I would eat a bunch of them. Since I ate so many, I would also refill it as well. It was pretty popular, and she would get a LOT of people stopping by her desk to get some. Typically the dispenser was empty in 3 days.
One day, I thought it would be funny to refill it with black licorice flavor Jelly Bellies and check out people's reaction (I sat one desk over from her). She was fine with it and played along. The reaction was not what I expected. The same amount of people stopped by, but it was an almost entirely different group of people stopping by than before, most of them like visibly excited to see the flavor.
That's a really interesting experiment!
I love licorice, but I think the limit of how many licorice jelly beans I can eat in a sitting is significantly lower than the number would be for non-licorice jelly beans.
i've heard some horror stories about sugar free gummies sending people to the bathroom so thats my vote for shittiest
I did that but with lifesavers mints. Was quitting smoking and accidentally grabbed a huge pack of sugar free instead of the regular….. I never want to experience a minty fresh asshole ever again.
I mean I bet it's good if someone wants to eat your ass. I'd rather taste mint over.....hmm....I guess pennies is the best way to describe it
I'm...concerned for that person's b-hole.
If you aren’t used to sugar free stuff, it will literally turn your insides into your outsides
Maltitol is the worst. I have a horrible story to share. Unfortunately I did a year of Keto and went to the movies with my family, we stopped at this boutique candy shop on the way and I found sugar free caramels. Excellent right? No, not at all excellent. I ate a whole bag, just under 200g. Fortunately we were home before my stomach exploded out of my butt. I've never felt so bloated in my life and I'm sure I went down a dress size once the evacuation was complete. Never ever again.
Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how was the movie?
Maltitol is a baby laxative hence the runs, drug dealers use it to cut cocaine and Heroin.
i ate a package of sugar free cookies once with xylitol, another sugar substitute like malitol. i thought i had food poisoning. it started with a rumbly tummy - you know the kind. not normal, definitely an omen of what may come. you immediately start doing a rewind of the past 24 hours and what you’ve put into your stomach. i’d had chicken the night before - was it that? then the cramping. like doubled over cramping and knowing it’s gas but it it’s, like just in there. it’s so bad i considered going to the hospital because i’ve never felt anything like this and i’ve had ulcers. i crawl to the toilet and as i’m shitting my guts out and sweating buckets onto the bathroom floor, i’m googling the ingredients of the cookies…
Xylitol can also kill dogs.
Omg, pull those up on Amazon and start reading the reviews. There were reviews that had me laughing so hard I was crying, couldn’t catch my breath no matter how hard I tried. Freaking hilarious!
Look up the 55 gallon drum of "personal lubricant" reviews 🤣😭🤣😭
🤣Lmao!!! I will absolutely do that! When I first discovered funny Amazon reviews I spent HOURS reading them. I remember there was one about a horse head mask that just absolutely killed me. Even just thinking about it now makes my cheeks hurt the way they did back them from all the smiling going on.
Yesss, the reviews are legendary 😂
Haribo I think
Yup. The reviews are great, genuinely worth a read through. People have fun with it.
Read the reviews for Haribo sugar free gummies on Amazon. Thank me later
there was a guy who ate a small bag of those before he went through security at Toronto Pearson International Airport. He got flagged as suspicious by security people because he was sweating profusely and acting nervous, and when he went in for questioning he basically shit all over one of the officers LMAO
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Honestly, I love those wax bottles. I tend to get them if I go to Cracker Barrel.
What if they made those wax bottles with shots? But make them a lil bigger, say 1.5 oz
Next stop….Shark Tank!
Nik-L-Nips! I still occasionally miss chewing on wax. I supposed I could, as an adult, but it's not the same
Those little rainbow sugar dots that are printed on receipt paper.
They still sell those things?
Half of the candy was the paper you ripped off with it
The real candy was the paper we made along the way.
I’ve seen some at five Below recently lol
I was obsessed with these as a kid and my Nana would buy a full toilet paper roll size of them for me so they're really nostalgic!! I'm not sure I'd still enjoy them as much as I used to though.
I've eaten so much paper because of candy buttons
They're supposed to be licked on the paper! I just found that out a couple years ago.
I feel like candy that’s designed to be licked is such a foreign concept now. Boomer candy
I was also obsessed. No idea why. I think we used to get them at the pool. Those and now and laters. Yuk.
Same! I got a candy button making kit when I was little even! I forgot about that until this thread!
I loved those things as a kid! No clue why.
those are my FAVORITE
Came here to say this, God bless. Called them Buttons where I grew up. Just awful lmao "candy buttons"
Enjoy that sugar and paper!
Good and Fruity. I personally think Good and Plenty is rat poison but that's because I hate anise and always have. But when I was a kid, Good and Fruity was the Red Licorice variant of that candy and they were quite tasty. Problem is that at some point over the years they changed the recipe and now they're just disappointing Mike and Ikes that fail to justify their continued existence.
I fucking love good and plenty. I also love that no one else will eat them haha
Good and Plenty is god-tier candy. That candy coating with the black licorice 🤌🤌
Yep. More for us few.
Anything by Palmer
It's all my family could afford growing up. It tastes like nostalgia
That's why I prefer store off/brand cola soda. All we ever got as kids. Vess rules!
There’s two different Palmer Candy. One is in Sioux City, IA and very delicious. The other exploded.
Yeah I was going to say that twin bings are pretty good.
If plastic and chocolate had a baby, then it would be those foil wrapped palmer candies. They only ever seemed to show up around the holidays.
The Easter bunnies. Ugh. They tasted like hell, and had that crazy wonky eye, haha.
Their factory exploded last year! https://www.nbcphiladelphia.com/news/local/r-m-palmer-chocolate-factory-explosion/3662323/?amp=1
What about the PB coins?! Those were my fave! Otherwise I agree.
My daughter was 2.5 and would throw the palmer candy back on the ground during easter egg hunts.
The worst chocolate.
I know their candy isn't great, but I like it.
candy hearts. chalk flavored LIES.
Upvoted because it’s funny, but I love candy hearts 😂
I love how the sayings have evolved over the years. I buy a couple packs a year, that's all i can stomach lol.
>I love how the sayings have evolved over the years. I buy a couple packs a year, that's all i can stomach lol. I Cho- Cho- Choose You!
I love these so much.
Love them. Same thing as Necco wafers.
I love Neccos. I have a package beside me lol
LOVE Necco wafers! The licorice flavoured ones especially.
They actually went out of business and another company bought it out of bankruptcy.
Love them. Same thing as Necco wafers.
They're now selling their misprints as ones for awkward situationships. They legit even say they're their misprints. Not even trying to hide that they're just selling their stuff they'd normally throw away.
My family fucks those up around Valentine's
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When I was like, 8. Our bus driver gave us bags of candy for Halloween. Like pixie sticks, smarties, you know, candies that are similar to chalk in texture. And an individual stick of sidewalk chalk. So yah. Candy hearts taste like chalk with a hint of sugar.
Those fucking abominations still exist? Why???? We’ve already got better tasting candy chalk?
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Molasses kisses! Hated them when I was a kid and love them as an adult!
My recollection of those was they were usually very hard, maybe stale.
> My recollection of those was they were usually very hard, maybe stale. If they're fresh they taste good. They're soft like salt water taffy.
These are some of my favorites!! I always saw them called Mary Janes.
I know exactly which bits of gravel you're talking about.
I LOVE those. The peanut butter ones too. I will definitely be pulling out a crown or filling or both.
I fucking love those things. My kid got none this year...
I love their wrappers though.
whatever the did to change butterfingers. they are HORRIBLE now when they were literally a top tier candy!!!!
I'll die mad about it. Assholes.
What did they do to Butterfingers? Haven't had one in ages. If I had to guess without any context or hints I'd say eliminated palm oil or ditched hydrogenated oils.
They used to be awesome, but now taste like dry tobacco shavings mixed with Elmer’s glue and then covered in a thin layer of wax.
Try a Fifth Avenue. Taste just the way a butterfinger should.
A worthy placebo, but the crunch is just wrong. Otherwise, a perfectly cromulent candy.
The non chocolate covered butter fingers completely disappeared from my local boutique candy shops. The places that sell everything by the pound. Love their grapefruit gummy wedges but COVID fucked whatever ingredient was needed for the peanut butter candy and it never got made again. Butterfinger also started using barf inducing fake oils instead of cocoa butter. Not even legally chocolate anymore.
Okay, I fucking love peanut butter, so generally reeses products are my favorites; but I really feel like reeses pieces have become terrible. I have a memory of them being good, but they are definitely awful now and the last time I had some they made my stomach feel sick.
I agree, I swear the peanut butter used to be creamier, the chocolate had a better snap, and they were bigger.
Fun fact, there is no chocolate in Reese’s pieces. Just a candy shell
I’ve actually always felt like this about Reese’s pieces! They just have this weird oily fakeness that puts me off after eating just a few. I’ve always preferred peanut butter m&ms.
This is why I made the switch to peanut butter m&ms. Reeses piece used to be good, then one day they just sucked.
Try peanut butter M&M's. One of my favorite candies of all time, I like them more than any Reese's.
Yep. These are how reese’s should taste.
Circus peanuts
I'm convinced that they only ever made one batch of those 100 years ago, and they've been trying to sell them ever since
Grew up loving these. Just artificial banana flavor which is by the way the best artificial flavor ever made. My grandpa loved them so he would always get them and I grew to love them like that.
Exactly! Artificial banana flavor is fantastic
Banana laffy taffy is elite and I will die on this hill.
Fun fact, artificial banana flavoring is based on a banana that no longer exists(or last I knew of, it was extinct). So anytime you eat banana flavored candy, you're tasting Gros Michel bananas.
Interestingly, that’s a myth: https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20140829-the-secrets-of-fake-flavours
They're great. Best when a little stale.
Some of us actually enjoy Circus Peanuts
I mean, this is just rude. CP are delicious
Oh no dude don't abbreviate it
Not like that at least!!!
You’re officially on a list somewhere
I never would’ve guessed that Circus Peanuts would be my downfall
I would edit this for clarity.
Your tastebuds must have gotten torched from covid
Thrills. I'm convinced someone solidified liquid toilet bowl cleaner and is selling it to the world as candy.
Love Thrills and its soapy taste.
Don't they market it as tasting like soap? So I guess it's more something you buy as a novelty than because it tastes delicious, like buying ultra spicy potato chips
Those black licorice candies that only old people have in their house.
As I get older, I think about that taste more often
It's begun
I love black licorice. I don't think that's an old people thing; I think it's an everybody-who-likes-strong-flavors thing.
You should check out the various Scandinavian candies. All sorts of licorice flavors are very popular here. Sweet, salty, spicy, you name it! Google "lakrits" and try some of the options! One of my favorites is Djungelvrål ("jungle scream")
I’m the only one in my family who likes liquorice. That was until my son came along. Turns out he likes liquorice as much as me. I’m not even mad I have to split all the liquorice with him now. I just buy twice as much 😎
Are you talking about AllSorts?? Those are great!
Peeps. Gritty, tasteless, always seem to be stale, like they've been on the shelf for a decade.
My mom opens the pack to let it get stale before eating them.. she's not right.
No, she is 100% right. That is the only proper way to eat Peeps.
This is the only correct way to eat Peeps.
I really like peeps, I always get them with all different holiday variations they have, although obviously the Easter ones are the most famous.
Peeps are my peeps
Day old stale Peeps are my favorite!!
>3-10 Day old stale Peeps are my favorite!! FTFY
I actually like them slightly stale
Try peeps in a s’more! Caramelized sugar is a game changer!
Mmmm stale peeps.
The best use of Peeps is [Peep fights!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nMmyQF35e8U)
Sugar Daddy, but we all know that the big dentist lobby keeps them out there for the public!
One of my favorite memories is my Grandma telling my daughter she needs a Sugar Daddy 😂😂 she meant for her loose tooth, but all I could think about was the other meaning and I was just silently dying lol
That made me smile!
i know at least 3 people who have had their fillings pulled out by those things!
My Mom lost a filling to one back in the late 70s.
These days I would say Butterfingers. They used to be awesome. Now they are just tasteless chocolate-y covered plastic shards.
Necco Wafers
But they're perfect for shingling the roof of a gingerbread house
Imagine making candy and it’s better as a building material lol
And they’re great for backyard target practice. They make a neat brightly colored poof of color when you hit them
Omg, that’s genius. Now I’m looking forward to Christmas next year to do this.
ok but have a terrible soft spot for them, I don't know why. They're just sort of .... soothing Now, circus peanuts.....
Dang. lol. I freaking love these. Still to this day.
I used to use them to pay tolls. They were candy quarters!
Necco wafers: only good with a drop of LSD on em
You shut your mouth.
Chocolate neccos are life
Shame on you! I will take my Neccos and orange circus peanuts and leave.
This is sacrilegious and objectively wrong. Boston wafers are the shit.
New butterfinger
Man this is the one that kills me. I LOVED butterfingers when I was a kid. They were far and away my favorite candy for a few long, formative childhood years. But now? Every time I’ve given them another chance over the past few years have always ended in regret. I don’t know exactly what they did to the formula, but I KNOW this isn’t just a case of growing out of my tastes. The texture, filling, the quality of the chocolate as well as the chocolate to bar ratio is all fucked up and they don’t break down properly. Once I start chewing they actually become the exact opposite of what the word “butterfingers” is because half the bar ends to sticking to my teeth indefinitely. It’s just sad man. Fuck Nestle.
Fruit Stripe Gum is awesome for 15 seconds
Candy Corn, waxy horrible stuff
That little yellow box with the chocolate covered cherry. Yuck!
Cherry Blossom. Agreed.
Circus peanuts. How is this even debatable?
Those gross foamy orange circus peanuts.
Apparently no one received the memo about white chocolate.
This thread has made me realize I love all candy. You can send all your candy corn and neccos and peeps to me. All of it! Except wax candy like soda and wax lips. Nobody likes those and if you do, you're wrong
Jujubes, they stick to your teeth like a mother fucker and taste like shit.
As a non American, Hershey’s chocolate. That shit is vile.
As an American, Hershey's chocolate. It is disgusting. We have access to so much better chocolate now and I have managed to turn my children into chocolate snobs lol
Popcorn flavored jelly beans. Why do we keep making nasty flavors?
Circus Peanuts are fucking vile I don’t know a single person that likes Good n Plenty
I absolutely used to love Whoppers. Whatever change they made totally ruined them. They taste bland, chewy and completely soulless now. 🤮
Peeps
Sweethearts. They taste like chalk
Are you talking about those amazing candy hearts only available around Valentine’s Day? The best thing about Valentine’s Day? How dare you!
Conversation hearts 🥹🥹🥹
Like tasty chalk though...
These bad boys are also a decent Tums substitute.
Candy corn, candy necklaces and those orange and black candies they give out on Halloween.
Yes! Those orange and black candies were always left in the bottom of my bag a month after Halloween! Did the even have a name?
i know it just got discontinued but i’m really surprised that zebra stripes gum lasted as long as it did
Twizzlers, taste like sugar-coated plastic. Just a personal opinion, I know many people love this stuff...
Their pull and peels are much better, taste more like a proper gummy candy
Pull n Peels, and the Nib kind are the best. Original is gross, and seemingly always rock hard and stale.
We have a really good friend from Denmark. Denmark is known for their licorice. We sent her a care package and included twizzlers as a joke. She was not amused. She still can’t believe that it is called licorice.
It really shouldn’t be.
As a Dane that has also tried Twizzlers. She is absolutely correct. Also factually. Licorice is a plant from which the taste derives. Twizzlers contain none of it. Real licorice does. Also if my licorice isn’t covered in Ammonium Chloride, its basically just children’s sweets. Sweet sweet Salmiak.
I actually think that red vines taste like plastic, and prefer the strawberry twizzlers (though how it’s stored is important so it’s not hard). I noticed once I moved to the west coast it was more difficult to find twizzlers versus red vines too. *ready to be downvoted to oblivion* lol
I actually think the same as well. Red Vines have a weird, plasticky aftertaste.
Good n plenty
How DARE you
You shut your mouth.
The candy that lies to you right on the box.
I LOVE IT
Those Burnt Peanut things just look and sound awful
Rainbow drops. Shrivelled, multicoloured package peanuts. Gross.
Hershey bars are gross. Fake taste.
Black licorice. It tastes like what I would imagine an insole from a construction worker’s boot after a 60 hour work week in the middle of the summer in Arizona would taste like
True story, so a coworker has a Jelly Belly dispenser at work on her desk. I have a sweet tooth like no other, so I would eat a bunch of them. Since I ate so many, I would also refill it as well. It was pretty popular, and she would get a LOT of people stopping by her desk to get some. Typically the dispenser was empty in 3 days. One day, I thought it would be funny to refill it with black licorice flavor Jelly Bellies and check out people's reaction (I sat one desk over from her). She was fine with it and played along. The reaction was not what I expected. The same amount of people stopped by, but it was an almost entirely different group of people stopping by than before, most of them like visibly excited to see the flavor.
That's a really interesting experiment! I love licorice, but I think the limit of how many licorice jelly beans I can eat in a sitting is significantly lower than the number would be for non-licorice jelly beans.
Scandinavian countries love black licorice. You usually get it covered in ammonia salt.
Butterfinger since they changed the recipe
Those little wax bottles with liquid inside.
Nik-L-Nip (wax bottle candy drink). What kind of name is that?
Circus peanuts!
Circus peanuts Wtf