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In HS a shy kid came up and told me he had pictures of my forearms that he would jerk off to.
I just said "neat" and be walked away and never spoke to me again.
Yeah I was a typical Jock, QB for football, CF for Baseball and Center Defense Mid Field for footie.
I've always had big forearms. Just a genetic thing.
I was about 15 with my friend at his house drinking steel reserve 40s and looking at porn magazines my friend had found somewhere… he challenged me to a jerk off contest, won in like 24 seconds then called me gay for not being able to finish
In college back in the day I was one of few to have a VHS player in my dorm room. Some kids found out, and wanted to view a porno in there now & then.
One day, come back from breakfast or lunch, open the door, there's about 5 dudes in there beating it. Paper towels out, just totally gross. Most of them were the type to get girls too, I was the lonely idiot one. Anyway it was definitely weird for me.
They all pretty much stopped, got up in unison, and walked out. I wasn't mad but it was just strange.
I find it so funny, like, "oh, EddieLee has a VHS? His dorm is the wank cave now" without even considering you lol, like a recurring problem, you leave your dorm alone for a bit and some guy breaks in to spank it
I was in the infantry (army, I passed the IQ test) during "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" and it was the gayest place on earth.
There are two types of young men who join the infantry:
1. Those who want to test themselves in battle against other young men.
2. Those who want to sleep in a foxhole with other young men.
lol I remember that the 82nd had an “unofficial” gay barracks. You could ask to live there away from your unit. I think they shut it down when some videos leaked
Army here too (1983) Gayest thing I ever did was ask a guy about the pink triangle tattoo on his hip while we were both naked and in the gang shower together. I can also confirm, the Army is a very gay place. When all the hysteria was going on the late 80's and early 90's and congressmen were wringing their hands about "we can't have gays in foxholes" I just kind of chuckled.
I've been playing this game with my first barracks roommate for ten years now. We're getting married in three months. I'm sure he's going to chicken out soon, but i'm not going to lose this time.
In the USAF we did this to fight over seats on the work truck.
One guy sitting in another dude's lap: "Do you feel me winking my butthole at you?"
He won the seat.
One of my deployments a dude left his computer unlocked.
Never leave your computer unlocked.
Several guys took dozens of.... 'questionable' pictures and made them his screensaver.
Many of these questionable pictures were of guys butt ass naked together in compromising positions and guys posing while tucked.
Once I left my camera on an island at summer camp. Surprisingly it was still there a week later. When I my dad went to pick up the film, there was a delay, then the cops showed up. Turns out the other section of middle school boys had found it and filled the roll with pictures of their dicks. Not a great look for a teacher to pick up a pack of photos of pubescent dicks! It was all laughed over as ‘boys will be boys’ (it was the 80s after all) probably be a much bigger deal today.
They get dressed up in costumes and makeup and then go spend the weekend together camping, cooking meals together, showering together, and then sharing feelings at night.
If soldiers weren’t fighting an enemy it would be the gayest organization since 1775.
You remember getting your clothes issued and you had to strip down in a room of hundreds of dudes? "This is kinda gay" was the last coherent thought I had in bootcamp.
I was in a fraternity, boy scouts and a handful of sports teams. Anytime a bunch of dudes live or spend a lot of time together without many women around it gets kinda gay. Not dicks in ass gay, but we're gonna do a lot of wrestling and sometimes the shirts come off.
I worked on the VBC in Iraq for a few years. I was talking to the guy who ran the incinerator and he said that anytime a battalion left the base they would find tons of those in the trash lmao
Back in high school when we were barely starting to get sexual, he showed me how he sucked his gf’s nipple by sucking mine for a sec… he stopped and jokingly called me gay for letting him do that😂
Edit: Too many comments to reply to. We both ended up straight straight with multiple female partners lol.
I heard that Cartman is supposed to be low-key gay, which is why he does things like jerk off Ben Afleck when his hand is Jennifer Lopez even though it's revealed at the end he didn't have a split personality and was just fucking with everyone or that time they went to Raisins and he doesn't get why all the other kids are going crazy over the girls.
Even with context, basically every episode of South Park (especially earlier seasons) leaves you feeling this way. Trying to explain the plot of any episode is ridiculous
So my brother is gay, and 2 years ago I stayed for the weekend at his house, during the weekend I got Covid so he suggested that I sleep in his room and that he would stay with his boyfriend in the guest room. His boyfriend however went out that night and apparently his phone died, he came back home very late not knowing that we switched rooms, meaning that he thought I was my brother since we look alike so he came in the bed and spooned me and started HUMPING me while he was naked and I woke up and started screaming. It was the funniest and most traumatizing experience I had by now.
I'm so confused by why he would suggest you switch rooms, wouldn't it make more sense for you to remain in the probably already incredibly infectious guest room?
Maybe the master bedroom had a private bathroom, so that he didn't have to walk through other areas of the house. Sort of a sick person quarantine suite.
A gay man offered to buy me a drink, not wanting to be rude, I accepted. He then leaned in and said that I had kind, soulful eyes.
I almost forgot I was straight for a second. Straight men don’t get compliments often.
It's wild; this. My straight buddies, I am always complimenting them, well anyone really, especially when it's something you know was personal to just them(people love me in customer service... Sigh). It is absolutely insane how giddy guys get after receiving a compliment. There's a guy at work that's pretty quiet and awkward and I talk to him often. He grew up in a fucked up house, like they protested Halloween and everything. Whatever..
Anyways, many moons ago I told him that his hair and beard looked really nice the way it was cut because normally his wife just buzzed it all off for him with one length. He turned beet red and said he went to the barber for the first time in like 10 years. He thanked me for the compliment and I could see it put a pep in his step after that... I seen him talking to a bunch of people after that, which is very unusual for him, and I could see he was touching his hair and moving it around.
He continues to go and get haircuts on occasion and every time he does, he comes and shows me... I'll compliment it, rinse and repeat.
He wore shorts for the first time the other day, his calf muscles were like... The size of footballs. Absolutely huge. Like, not even exaggerating. His brother works there as well and his brother works out daily and he has chicken legs. I noticed and I said "holy shit dude, where did those things come from, they're insane!!" and his brother said "yeah, this bastard doesn't work out but one time in his life and has legs of a god and then I have these things" and points at his legs.
A while later, he was feeling all moody over something, I started chit chatting with him and I told him his cologne smelled good(everyone knows I'm a cologne fanatic) so he perked up... He went to get his cup and came back and squeezed my shoulder and said "you really do know the exact thing to say to anyone to change their day, you know that right? I've never received compliments from anyone except you." He laughed, slapped me on the back. Lol
I went to a gay club with some friends and a guy told me I was gorgeous. He wasn't hitting on me but was pretty matter of fact about it. This was probably five years ago and it still makes me feel good.
I was with my wife and kid inside a mall when a very obvious gay man (literally had a shirt on that said "I'm Gay. So what?" in rainbow print came up behind me and said "GRRRR. I like bears." I replied "That's cool" and walked away.
It wasn't until months later after watching Gabriel Iglesias that I figured out what a "bear" was to gay men. . .
For context, I’m a large, hairy man and I don’t brush my hair because it reverts to its wild state within an hour, two if I use product. I had a very flamboyantly gay man come up to me randomly on the street and told me I was rocking the freshly fucked look. He then kissed me on the cheek and skipped off. Yes, he really did skip. My fiancee (female) laughed her ass off while I stood there wondering what the hell just happened.
A group of us guys used to wrestle each other in high school just for fun or when we'd need to resolve some disagreements. We would try to get each other to tap out but since we weren't professionals and we were all close knit, we didn't know the best way to do it and when one of us had another pinned, the other would refuse to submit.
We had the idea to maybe try to give wedgies to each other in an effort to get the other to submit. And that was all good and well for a while but even then, underwear would rip or there would be the off chance that your opponent wasn't wearing any.
Finally, someone had enough and literally went for the other guy's testicles - like pinching them in their hands until the person submitted out of sheer pain. This became standard practice going forward for our friends group and we could call the sport "Nut-grab".
So what initially started as straight guys grappling each other for fun turned into a game where we would try to forcefully reach for each other's genitals through their clothing. Definitely the gayest thing I've ever experienced.
ended up in the "wrong" mens toilet at mardi gras in Sydney... I have a gay brother, loads of gay friends, but the orgy going on in there was something else..
Stayed at a hostel in Miami once. My first time in a hostel. Had a bar out front, so I spent my first night there. Walk into the bathroom, sounds of a total BJ going on in the stall.. Uggh, so I piss & wash my hands, listening in, I could tell it was 2 dudes. I recall another guy/guest walked in, and I just acknowledged 'Yup" as in, this is really happening.
Went back to the bar, sat down, and wondered if 'hostel' was code for gay networking or something.
When I was about 17-18 years old, 3 friends and I partied in my room at my parents' house. As I had a basement room, we were often in my room because we could be loud there until late at night. As usual, we listened to music, watched funny videos, wrestled against each other, did stupid things and drank a lot of alcohol... Usually too much... So much that I kept blacking out.
One night we partied and drank again until I couldn't remember anything. The only thing that remained was a picture on my cell phone. We were lying quarter in bed, arm in arm, without clothes, just the blanket over our hips. To this day, I don't know who took the picture as we were all lying in bed.
I was in Alexandria and met a guy in a hostel that night who hugged me when he saw me, ok maybe he is just friendly? The next morning he wanted to hang out and he paid for my meals which as a frugal traveller I thought was awesome, but then we went to the beach at night and he wanted to hold hands as we walked which he insisted was normal in Egypt though I never seen anyone else doing that, I haven't even done that with a girl before let alone a guy so yeah I guess that was my "gayest" experience, or just bros being bros lol.
Many men in Uganda hold hands with each other when they're friends. It was a bit weird to see that men hold hands like that because being gay is extremely dangerous and they even established an anti-gay law there recently..
I have been seriously propositioned by men four different times. When I was 18, a random guy offered to pay me to watch me jack off. I declined.
Another time, I was 19), an elderly man tried to push me into his tent for interaction (he was the grandfather of one of my friends--we were all camping and all intoxicated. I declined.
As a med student doing a prostate exam on a retired Marine at a hospital who was admitted for severe psoriasis. Took me forever since I was new at this with extra large fingers/hands and he leaked semen and may have had an orgasm? I just ignored it.
I was watching a movie and the scene cut to a fat ass that was bending over in work pants. I yelled out "DAAAYUMMM!!!"
The camera panned up and it was just some out of shape guy in his 40s.
It's a tie between that and having a very temporary crush on Haku before he told Naruto that he was a dude.
In my defense, they literally drew a girl and gave Haku a female voice actress. Then they just say he's a boy? Nah son, that's not my fault.
>The camera panned up and it was just some out of shape guy in his 40s.
The amount of times I've been tricked staring at a fine ass...only to realize it belonged to a man oO
I was working on my car in the back yard. The next door neighbor was having a cookout and at the end a guy came to the fence between us and said "I really enjoyed watching you work on your car today. It turned me on and I wish you were gay"
When my first wife and t told my mom we were getting married, my mom told her she thought I was gay.
I was shocked. As a teen I had girls over fairly often. I took women to homecoming and prom. I had no idea where the hell my mom was coming from. She had even given me a poster of Cindy Crawford in a swimsuit - which wasn’t very glamorous and I threw away. But wow
My friends touching and rubbing my shoulder, abdomen, and thighs. It's weird but I think I'm okay with it, I count it as a compliment
Edit: Oh yeah and my back too. Which is weird because I don't have as much muscle in my back as compared to the other parts I've mentioned. Also compliments, if they count? I've never gotten a compliment from a woman, but I've gotten several weird ones. The weirdest one (and the most recent one) was some random new guy calling my voice "unique" and "pure". All of these things are the only source of my self confidence lmfao 😂
I used to work with this gay Lebanese guy. He was attractive and I do not say this lightly. Guy could make me laugh and was just an awesome dude. We got drunk one night and he asked to massage me. Bro had the touch of God. In no way am I gay or do I enjoy penis or anything but I think I had a man crush on him
Back in highschool I used to win Gay chicken all the time
That was like an early 2000s two dudes would see who flinched first while touching each other thing.
You'd think that'd have been a signifier or something. Knowing that I am now a Gay
Got tricked into going to a gay theater and everybody was banging. Very gay.
Edit for more context: We were about 19 at the time. It was a childhood friend who just discovered he was gay. And lately he had delineating between straight and gay activities we did. And he felt we were doing more “straight” activities than gay. (He eventually became quite a diva). So he did this gay theater trick into leveling the score. I’d been to his parties where gay orgies popup in the kitchen. He knew I was truly straight and not phased by his debauchery. I did laugh once I entered. He got me. It was funny then and still now. It was quite an experience.
I befriended a feminine guy at the bar once. We were having a good conversation and I don’t judge. He invited me back to see his hotel. Again, I was just naive and said “why not?”. Well when we got in his room he offered to suck my dick. Then suddenly everything made sense. I got the hell out of there.
Guy hands me his phone at a party to show me a meme, my drunk ass starts swiping. He had dozens of pictures on his phone of his hard penis dressed up in lil costumes and paint. Basically it was 5 guys huddled around his phone looking at his penis. Blew him later that night, and that was the gayest thing I've ever done as a straight man.
A drunken friend went down on a girl we double teamed after I had nutted.
I did not know that the night would end with my semen in another man's mouth.
In about 1991, a guy walked into my college friend’s apartment party with two GORGEOUS girls - one on each arm (I found out all three were literally runway models). We spoke for a while and he was hilarious. About an hour later, he announced to a group he was going to the store for cigarettes and asked if anyone wanted anything. I asked for a Snickers bar.
He returned to the party and distributed his purchases. I was last. He said, “I know you wanted a Snickers bar, but I got you a Score bar. I hope I can score with you later!”
I panicked and ran to my friend. “Vicki, Randy just hit on me! What do I do?”
She knew very well I’m straight. “Just tell him you’re straight.”
And so I did. Randy and I had a great time talking and laughing the rest of the night.
In college my best friend and I passed out in his bed and when I woke up he was laying on me with his head in my chest. He woke up and was just like “you good bro?” And I was like “I’m good” and then we both fell asleep again and stayed in that position until we woke up for real. Never talked about it after haha.
I was in a fraternity in college to so the line between straight and gay was always blurred lol
When I was 17 I lived in Israel for a year and I would frequently visit an older gentleman (who was my tour guide) and his family in Tel Aviv. He knew I was looking for Israeli women to talk to, so he sent me to a specific area on the coast. I was looking pretty nice and just sat on a bench.
Within 30 minutes, I had 4 different gentlemen walk up and start talking to me. 2 of them sat next to me and made very quick advances and I had to explain to them I wasn’t gay. The fourth finally explained that this was a well known spot for gay men to meet.
Cheeky bastard that Doron was.
I had a buddy as a teen. He was a bit older. I was 15 he was about 22. One day we’re smoking a joint and he tells me to turn off the lights so we could smoke. I’m like wtf, it’s dark already in here. I’m like nah I’m good. So I left.
I was super uncomfortable because I caught the vibe right away. What was scary was he had me by like 80lbs and a few inches taller. He literally could’ve forced himself on me.
Long story shortened is he’s doing 44 years in jail for rape of a minor in Oregon. He wound up as a teachers aide in high school and raped a student. Very close to the age I was when we stopped being friends.
There were a group of guys from my middle school that used to do this. They called them selves “The Meat Thugz” the rumors were they had to show their “meat” in order to be part of the group and they were given a nickname based on the way it looked. If I’m remembering correctly one of the “Thugz” name was Elephant meat, because well… it looked like an elephant trunk.
I kissed a guy. I needed to see if being attracted to the same gender as myself might appeal to me and if it was because I hadn't realised I was into guys that I hadn't gotten a girlfriend.
So, I kissed him once, and then with some passion - some tongue slipped in as well and he was really into it. I wasn't.
I knew INSTANTLY.
I wasn't gay. But he was bisexual.
I had a guy grope me in a concert. I was 18 at the time. Athlectic and lean but with big thighs and ass from running and cycling a lot.
I told him he had no right to grope anyone without their consent and that he could have gotten punched. He apologised and I moved on.
HS wrestling we used to use a shower room. One of our guys was a “show-er” not a grower. He used to hit the helicopter and fling water from his dick onto other guys
Was at a school camp when I was 15/16 and it only had a communal shower. Entered alone and soon there were around 20 naked dudes my age showering out in the open. Had never really seen naked people irl, so it was a bit awkward. Awoke something in me that I still haven't dealt with.
I 'm a straight older guy and I marched in the Pride parade last weekend. It was a spontaneous thing. I drove my grandson into town for his music lesson, which was right on the parade route. So once I parked I had 90 minutes to kill and walked to the start of the parade just before it kicked off. So many happy people, all kinds of costumes and causes. The spirit of the thing moved me, so I asked a group if I could walk with them. They handed me a rainbow heart paddle and I marched with them about 3/4 of a mile right back to the music school. Timing was perfect and arrived as my grandson was finishing up. The folowing week at work, I found the group's webite for homeless youth and submitted a matching donation through my company DE&I dept. To add, I have some close family members who are gay and I felt like I should support them in a small way.
I never participated, but a few of my friends from middle school would watch porn on a TV and yank their shit side by side on the couch until they all finished.
I went to a bar with my wife to play pool, it's our weekly "get-away" from the kids. I finish my beer and head into the bathroom, pick a urinal and start relieving myself.
Big dude walks in, makes a grunting sound pulling his pants down and situating himself at the next urinal, then looks over and says "You have a really nice looking penis." In the softest tone I've ever heard from a man.
Realised 20 years after the fact that my buddy at Uni was probably in love with me.
Wanted to go clubbing just with me
Got really shitty when I picked up women
His last words to me were kinda like being dumped by an upset girlfriend.
I had a friend in HS who I also roomed with in my early 20s who was like this with me. We would hang out constantly together, good buds. Didn't notice any issues with random girls over but when I started really dating my GF/now my wife, he got pretty shitty about it & I moved out shortly thereafter.
I just turned 57. It dawned on me maybe a week ago that he might've been into me. John, I'm sorry. I had no idea.
When I was 13 my best friend told me a story about the time him and his friends were hanging out one night and they decided all to sit around the living room while jerking themselves under blankets while watching porn. One of them nutted in the hallway unexpectedly and a little brother at about 8 years old accidentally slipped on it and hit their head. They refuse to talk about it when I bring it up .
Easy. Being told point-blank at a house party by one of my sister’s very drunk and very outspoken married gay friends in her empty kitchen, “Come with me to the bathroom. I’ll suck your dick so good you’ll forget you have a wife.” I did not come with him to the bathroom as requested.
He was very serious and got pretty upset that I shot him down. Somewhere buried in my text logs was the novel he wrote me the next morning apologizing for being so forward… but that if I ever changed my mind to let him know.
One day I was chilling with my GF (now an ex) when I saw a dick pic pop up on her phone.
Initially I was pissed off but when we got together she had already warned me during that awkward early stage of just being fuck buddies.
Anyway, she adds me to the chat one day because she knows I'd love to have a threesome one day.
After around 6 months, she's barely active in this chat and it's just two guys hanging out, sharing wanking videos and porn from time to time.
He was much more towards bisexuality than me and often told me how he wants to suck my cock but would probably never actually do it.
And to make it all better, we've got a lot of mutual friends and (I think) none of them know about our escapades.
Was at a pride parade in Houston and had a guy dressed as Luigi run by and grab my dick and balls and run off into the crowd. I kinda just stood there for a second not knowing whether to be mad or just laugh at wat happened.
One of my friends dared me and my other friend to kiss each other on the lips for 2 bucks. It was just a quick peck. Used the prize money to buy another round of beer for me and the guy I kissed. Best 2 bucks I spent.
The Boy Scouts in the “good old days”. Fellow scouts who were leaders in the troop preyed on us under the guise of “just boys being boys figuring things out”. The second time one started jacking off in front of me in a tent at summer camp I was done.
I'm hoping serious means it actually happened, rather than serious in tone lol. If not feel free to remove. Was at a work happy hour a few months back and kissed one of my coworkers. We were walking home with a mixed group and reached the metro, which only half of us were taking. We're saying goodbye and one of the others says "you wont kiss!!". We're all pretty drunk at this point so he and I just look at each other, shrug and go for a quick peck, followed by saying something like "how about that!". We still laugh about it.
For a guy I'm always told I have nice feet. Well a relatively new friend of mine, we were sitting around having a few beers and I kept scrunching and rotating my feet in circles and buddy says, I give a mean foot massage....I chuckled.
Got a foot massage by a 6'7 dude.
Ngl...no shit, big hands gave the best foot massage I've ever had, better than the ex's (all female) ever gave me lmao.
I should add he used lotion as well.
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In HS a shy kid came up and told me he had pictures of my forearms that he would jerk off to. I just said "neat" and be walked away and never spoke to me again.
You must have some thicccc forearms mate
Yeah I was a typical Jock, QB for football, CF for Baseball and Center Defense Mid Field for footie. I've always had big forearms. Just a genetic thing.
Can you show us some pictures of them???...
I found the shy kid from back then ↑ ↑
^ third most gay thing he's experienced
Dont stop...
Second most gayest thing he experienced ^
I posted a Pic on my profile cause I'm too stupid to figure it out here. It's my only post.
Having seen the forearms, I now declare the story true.
RIP ur DM’s 😿
yeah I’m gonna jack off to those too. brb
Do you boo. I ain't judging.
The fact I just went to your profile to peep those forearms is the gayest thing I’ve ever experienced.
Ok seriously did you post them due to excessive requests ?! 🤣 I’m pretty jealous of those forearms btw
Sounds like a dare 😂😂
I was about 15 with my friend at his house drinking steel reserve 40s and looking at porn magazines my friend had found somewhere… he challenged me to a jerk off contest, won in like 24 seconds then called me gay for not being able to finish
Yeah that’s gay
It’s only gay if they didn’t say “no homo” before starting 😅
In college back in the day I was one of few to have a VHS player in my dorm room. Some kids found out, and wanted to view a porno in there now & then. One day, come back from breakfast or lunch, open the door, there's about 5 dudes in there beating it. Paper towels out, just totally gross. Most of them were the type to get girls too, I was the lonely idiot one. Anyway it was definitely weird for me. They all pretty much stopped, got up in unison, and walked out. I wasn't mad but it was just strange.
I find it so funny, like, "oh, EddieLee has a VHS? His dorm is the wank cave now" without even considering you lol, like a recurring problem, you leave your dorm alone for a bit and some guy breaks in to spank it
Thats extremely gay
Your gay friend tricked you into giving him a show, no wonder he won.
That’s pretty gay
the venn diagram of situations involving steel reserve and situations involving good decision making are two separate circles
Did you look into each other’s eyes?
Well I was in the Marines, and it’s probably the gayest thing you can do besides marrying another dude.
I was in the infantry (army, I passed the IQ test) during "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" and it was the gayest place on earth. There are two types of young men who join the infantry: 1. Those who want to test themselves in battle against other young men. 2. Those who want to sleep in a foxhole with other young men.
lol I remember that the 82nd had an “unofficial” gay barracks. You could ask to live there away from your unit. I think they shut it down when some videos leaked
✨Sounds fabulous ✨
Army here too (1983) Gayest thing I ever did was ask a guy about the pink triangle tattoo on his hip while we were both naked and in the gang shower together. I can also confirm, the Army is a very gay place. When all the hysteria was going on the late 80's and early 90's and congressmen were wringing their hands about "we can't have gays in foxholes" I just kind of chuckled.
Army, and same. Gay chicken contests, lol.
I hear the Navy gets rid of the “chicken” part
The navy has girls on the ships now
All that means is that the ladies are together and dudes are still left with a choice of other dudes.
Do they watch or something?
I've been playing this game with my first barracks roommate for ten years now. We're getting married in three months. I'm sure he's going to chicken out soon, but i'm not going to lose this time.
Push him over the top by picking out curtains for your place. Sexual stuff might not be gay enough
In the USAF we did this to fight over seats on the work truck. One guy sitting in another dude's lap: "Do you feel me winking my butthole at you?" He won the seat.
Was going to say this. Marine Corps = gayest straight dudes you’ll ever meet. Esp grunts. Don’t gay chicken with doc.
Prior Army, we’ve done ALOT of questionable gay shit
You can’t just drop that and not give examples
One of my deployments a dude left his computer unlocked. Never leave your computer unlocked. Several guys took dozens of.... 'questionable' pictures and made them his screensaver. Many of these questionable pictures were of guys butt ass naked together in compromising positions and guys posing while tucked.
Once I left my camera on an island at summer camp. Surprisingly it was still there a week later. When I my dad went to pick up the film, there was a delay, then the cops showed up. Turns out the other section of middle school boys had found it and filled the roll with pictures of their dicks. Not a great look for a teacher to pick up a pack of photos of pubescent dicks! It was all laughed over as ‘boys will be boys’ (it was the 80s after all) probably be a much bigger deal today.
They get dressed up in costumes and makeup and then go spend the weekend together camping, cooking meals together, showering together, and then sharing feelings at night. If soldiers weren’t fighting an enemy it would be the gayest organization since 1775.
Is it true that the Marines have "the gayest straight men and the straightest gay men you'll ever meet ", or is that the Army?
You remember getting your clothes issued and you had to strip down in a room of hundreds of dudes? "This is kinda gay" was the last coherent thought I had in bootcamp.
I was in a fraternity, boy scouts and a handful of sports teams. Anytime a bunch of dudes live or spend a lot of time together without many women around it gets kinda gay. Not dicks in ass gay, but we're gonna do a lot of wrestling and sometimes the shirts come off.
Construction sites can be pretty gay as well. Not touching or anything, but lots of innuendos and gay talk
About 20 mf’s shared a flesh light on our deployment 🤢
I worked on the VBC in Iraq for a few years. I was talking to the guy who ran the incinerator and he said that anytime a battalion left the base they would find tons of those in the trash lmao
Came here to make sure this was in the top 5
It’s not gay if you’re wearing boot bands.
Back in high school when we were barely starting to get sexual, he showed me how he sucked his gf’s nipple by sucking mine for a sec… he stopped and jokingly called me gay for letting him do that😂 Edit: Too many comments to reply to. We both ended up straight straight with multiple female partners lol.
Did you break the news to him?
Reminds me of when Cartman put butters dick in his mouth to prove Butters was gay
I heard that Cartman is supposed to be low-key gay, which is why he does things like jerk off Ben Afleck when his hand is Jennifer Lopez even though it's revealed at the end he didn't have a split personality and was just fucking with everyone or that time they went to Raisins and he doesn't get why all the other kids are going crazy over the girls.
As someone who hasn’t watched a whole lot of South Park, reading this with no context was a wild ride
Even with context, basically every episode of South Park (especially earlier seasons) leaves you feeling this way. Trying to explain the plot of any episode is ridiculous
You get a feeling there’s no gf nipple? That it was all just set up to suck yours?
At least he didn't take a picture like Cartman with Butters.
Went into a gay gloryhole area behind a sex shop with a friend who was gay and walked around while he was busy. Saw enough to know I am straight.
Checked the floor beams to ensure a secure foundation
Stomping the floor, "Is this mahogany?"
"This glory hole is definitely not up to code"
\#1 ally, we thank you for your service
So my brother is gay, and 2 years ago I stayed for the weekend at his house, during the weekend I got Covid so he suggested that I sleep in his room and that he would stay with his boyfriend in the guest room. His boyfriend however went out that night and apparently his phone died, he came back home very late not knowing that we switched rooms, meaning that he thought I was my brother since we look alike so he came in the bed and spooned me and started HUMPING me while he was naked and I woke up and started screaming. It was the funniest and most traumatizing experience I had by now.
I am equal parts horrified for your experience and laughing my ass off.
I read this as "hornified"
What an awkward way for him to catch covid.
Through the dick
Now you know your brother is a bottom.
I would love if this realization came while he was reading your comment
I feel like two synapses in my brain connected just from reading this comment.
Imagining you waking up screaming is making me roll on the floor.
I'm so confused by why he would suggest you switch rooms, wouldn't it make more sense for you to remain in the probably already incredibly infectious guest room?
Maybe the master bedroom had a private bathroom, so that he didn't have to walk through other areas of the house. Sort of a sick person quarantine suite.
That was exactly the reason 🤣
A gay man offered to buy me a drink, not wanting to be rude, I accepted. He then leaned in and said that I had kind, soulful eyes. I almost forgot I was straight for a second. Straight men don’t get compliments often.
>I almost forgot I was straight for a second. Straight men don’t get compliments often. Classic confusion tactics, leave them bewildered
Discombobulate
did you snap out of it before or after smashing it out?
The wedding is this September in Santorini!
It's wild; this. My straight buddies, I am always complimenting them, well anyone really, especially when it's something you know was personal to just them(people love me in customer service... Sigh). It is absolutely insane how giddy guys get after receiving a compliment. There's a guy at work that's pretty quiet and awkward and I talk to him often. He grew up in a fucked up house, like they protested Halloween and everything. Whatever.. Anyways, many moons ago I told him that his hair and beard looked really nice the way it was cut because normally his wife just buzzed it all off for him with one length. He turned beet red and said he went to the barber for the first time in like 10 years. He thanked me for the compliment and I could see it put a pep in his step after that... I seen him talking to a bunch of people after that, which is very unusual for him, and I could see he was touching his hair and moving it around. He continues to go and get haircuts on occasion and every time he does, he comes and shows me... I'll compliment it, rinse and repeat. He wore shorts for the first time the other day, his calf muscles were like... The size of footballs. Absolutely huge. Like, not even exaggerating. His brother works there as well and his brother works out daily and he has chicken legs. I noticed and I said "holy shit dude, where did those things come from, they're insane!!" and his brother said "yeah, this bastard doesn't work out but one time in his life and has legs of a god and then I have these things" and points at his legs. A while later, he was feeling all moody over something, I started chit chatting with him and I told him his cologne smelled good(everyone knows I'm a cologne fanatic) so he perked up... He went to get his cup and came back and squeezed my shoulder and said "you really do know the exact thing to say to anyone to change their day, you know that right? I've never received compliments from anyone except you." He laughed, slapped me on the back. Lol
Aww, this is so incredibly sweet and it really warmed my heart. Thanks for sharing, and keep it up with the compliments to the dudes in your life!
Oh that's bullshit, I got a compliment in 2015
And you still wear that shirt as often as possible.
I went to a gay club with some friends and a guy told me I was gorgeous. He wasn't hitting on me but was pretty matter of fact about it. This was probably five years ago and it still makes me feel good.
I was with my wife and kid inside a mall when a very obvious gay man (literally had a shirt on that said "I'm Gay. So what?" in rainbow print came up behind me and said "GRRRR. I like bears." I replied "That's cool" and walked away. It wasn't until months later after watching Gabriel Iglesias that I figured out what a "bear" was to gay men. . .
For context, I’m a large, hairy man and I don’t brush my hair because it reverts to its wild state within an hour, two if I use product. I had a very flamboyantly gay man come up to me randomly on the street and told me I was rocking the freshly fucked look. He then kissed me on the cheek and skipped off. Yes, he really did skip. My fiancee (female) laughed her ass off while I stood there wondering what the hell just happened.
The compliment and kiss is like a gay man's vampire bite. You're gay now.
true. I caught the gay back in ‘95. Went into remission in ‘99, but it still lurks, so now I’m just bi.
I suck a dick once a year to stave off the gay hunger.
A group of us guys used to wrestle each other in high school just for fun or when we'd need to resolve some disagreements. We would try to get each other to tap out but since we weren't professionals and we were all close knit, we didn't know the best way to do it and when one of us had another pinned, the other would refuse to submit. We had the idea to maybe try to give wedgies to each other in an effort to get the other to submit. And that was all good and well for a while but even then, underwear would rip or there would be the off chance that your opponent wasn't wearing any. Finally, someone had enough and literally went for the other guy's testicles - like pinching them in their hands until the person submitted out of sheer pain. This became standard practice going forward for our friends group and we could call the sport "Nut-grab". So what initially started as straight guys grappling each other for fun turned into a game where we would try to forcefully reach for each other's genitals through their clothing. Definitely the gayest thing I've ever experienced.
You could’ve stopped after “a group of us guys used to wrestle”
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ended up in the "wrong" mens toilet at mardi gras in Sydney... I have a gay brother, loads of gay friends, but the orgy going on in there was something else..
Stayed at a hostel in Miami once. My first time in a hostel. Had a bar out front, so I spent my first night there. Walk into the bathroom, sounds of a total BJ going on in the stall.. Uggh, so I piss & wash my hands, listening in, I could tell it was 2 dudes. I recall another guy/guest walked in, and I just acknowledged 'Yup" as in, this is really happening. Went back to the bar, sat down, and wondered if 'hostel' was code for gay networking or something.
It's fun to stay at the YMCA.
Once in college a drunk dude kissed me and he wasn’t that bad of a kisser ngl
When I was about 17-18 years old, 3 friends and I partied in my room at my parents' house. As I had a basement room, we were often in my room because we could be loud there until late at night. As usual, we listened to music, watched funny videos, wrestled against each other, did stupid things and drank a lot of alcohol... Usually too much... So much that I kept blacking out. One night we partied and drank again until I couldn't remember anything. The only thing that remained was a picture on my cell phone. We were lying quarter in bed, arm in arm, without clothes, just the blanket over our hips. To this day, I don't know who took the picture as we were all lying in bed.
your parents 😂
I was in Alexandria and met a guy in a hostel that night who hugged me when he saw me, ok maybe he is just friendly? The next morning he wanted to hang out and he paid for my meals which as a frugal traveller I thought was awesome, but then we went to the beach at night and he wanted to hold hands as we walked which he insisted was normal in Egypt though I never seen anyone else doing that, I haven't even done that with a girl before let alone a guy so yeah I guess that was my "gayest" experience, or just bros being bros lol.
To be fair, the holding hands thing is actually true for the Middle East in general.
In the Philippines the tough guys wear headband and sit on each others laps
Many men in Uganda hold hands with each other when they're friends. It was a bit weird to see that men hold hands like that because being gay is extremely dangerous and they even established an anti-gay law there recently..
Sucked 2 dicks. The first one was to see if I liked it and the 2nd was to make sure I didn't like it
That was a long time ago tho, try a third to refresh your memory
It was last night
both last night?
I have been seriously propositioned by men four different times. When I was 18, a random guy offered to pay me to watch me jack off. I declined. Another time, I was 19), an elderly man tried to push me into his tent for interaction (he was the grandfather of one of my friends--we were all camping and all intoxicated. I declined.
How much was he going to pay?
A vital question
I don't recall, this was over 40 years ago.
Great, now we have to adjust for inflation
The other two times, however…
How about the other 2? Did you take them up on their offer?
The real question. You can’t just say there were four times and then casually leave out half of them…
Slapping each other's butts. Still do it tbh.
yep that's a common one
As a med student doing a prostate exam on a retired Marine at a hospital who was admitted for severe psoriasis. Took me forever since I was new at this with extra large fingers/hands and he leaked semen and may have had an orgasm? I just ignored it.
That’s just a marine thing don’t worry about it
Wow, are you accepting new patients?
Doctor, what’s the link between psoriasis and prostate cancer???????
They’re both a real pain in the ass.
I was watching a movie and the scene cut to a fat ass that was bending over in work pants. I yelled out "DAAAYUMMM!!!" The camera panned up and it was just some out of shape guy in his 40s. It's a tie between that and having a very temporary crush on Haku before he told Naruto that he was a dude. In my defense, they literally drew a girl and gave Haku a female voice actress. Then they just say he's a boy? Nah son, that's not my fault.
>The camera panned up and it was just some out of shape guy in his 40s. The amount of times I've been tricked staring at a fine ass...only to realize it belonged to a man oO
I mean, a nice ass is a nice ass.
Double cheeked up, Thursday afternoon, hella ass, the suns still out. That’s the homie. https://youtu.be/9Pq9pRuO8ds?si=RvOnwhlLaBge4lDV
I was working on my car in the back yard. The next door neighbor was having a cookout and at the end a guy came to the fence between us and said "I really enjoyed watching you work on your car today. It turned me on and I wish you were gay"
When my first wife and t told my mom we were getting married, my mom told her she thought I was gay. I was shocked. As a teen I had girls over fairly often. I took women to homecoming and prom. I had no idea where the hell my mom was coming from. She had even given me a poster of Cindy Crawford in a swimsuit - which wasn’t very glamorous and I threw away. But wow
>She had even given me a poster of Cindy Crawford in a swimsuit - which (...) I threw away. Maybe that was the reason.
Going to basic training. That was pretty fucking gay.
Attending a Lady Gaga concert with my friends and realizing I knew all the lyrics and dance moves.
My friends touching and rubbing my shoulder, abdomen, and thighs. It's weird but I think I'm okay with it, I count it as a compliment Edit: Oh yeah and my back too. Which is weird because I don't have as much muscle in my back as compared to the other parts I've mentioned. Also compliments, if they count? I've never gotten a compliment from a woman, but I've gotten several weird ones. The weirdest one (and the most recent one) was some random new guy calling my voice "unique" and "pure". All of these things are the only source of my self confidence lmfao 😂
I guess the ambiguity would really depend on the context
I used to work with this gay Lebanese guy. He was attractive and I do not say this lightly. Guy could make me laugh and was just an awesome dude. We got drunk one night and he asked to massage me. Bro had the touch of God. In no way am I gay or do I enjoy penis or anything but I think I had a man crush on him
I once made a spinach dip in a loaf of sourdough bread.
Explain yourself
Did you at least lightly toast the bread chunks from the hollowed out loaf?
Back in highschool I used to win Gay chicken all the time That was like an early 2000s two dudes would see who flinched first while touching each other thing. You'd think that'd have been a signifier or something. Knowing that I am now a Gay
Got tricked into going to a gay theater and everybody was banging. Very gay. Edit for more context: We were about 19 at the time. It was a childhood friend who just discovered he was gay. And lately he had delineating between straight and gay activities we did. And he felt we were doing more “straight” activities than gay. (He eventually became quite a diva). So he did this gay theater trick into leveling the score. I’d been to his parties where gay orgies popup in the kitchen. He knew I was truly straight and not phased by his debauchery. I did laugh once I entered. He got me. It was funny then and still now. It was quite an experience.
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You are definitely gay then. Bros gotta click first.
I befriended a feminine guy at the bar once. We were having a good conversation and I don’t judge. He invited me back to see his hotel. Again, I was just naive and said “why not?”. Well when we got in his room he offered to suck my dick. Then suddenly everything made sense. I got the hell out of there.
Did you think you were going to put a lego set together in his room?
Before or after you got your dick sucked?
Real questions
“I was so mad, i almost didnt fuck him”
Guy hands me his phone at a party to show me a meme, my drunk ass starts swiping. He had dozens of pictures on his phone of his hard penis dressed up in lil costumes and paint. Basically it was 5 guys huddled around his phone looking at his penis. Blew him later that night, and that was the gayest thing I've ever done as a straight man.
r/cospenis lol
Clicking that link, knowing what I was in for, probably is my answer to the OP now.
Wait, you blew him? Uhhh
Why did you blow him?
A drunken friend went down on a girl we double teamed after I had nutted. I did not know that the night would end with my semen in another man's mouth.
In about 1991, a guy walked into my college friend’s apartment party with two GORGEOUS girls - one on each arm (I found out all three were literally runway models). We spoke for a while and he was hilarious. About an hour later, he announced to a group he was going to the store for cigarettes and asked if anyone wanted anything. I asked for a Snickers bar. He returned to the party and distributed his purchases. I was last. He said, “I know you wanted a Snickers bar, but I got you a Score bar. I hope I can score with you later!” I panicked and ran to my friend. “Vicki, Randy just hit on me! What do I do?” She knew very well I’m straight. “Just tell him you’re straight.” And so I did. Randy and I had a great time talking and laughing the rest of the night.
Had a guy grab my package.
UPS or FedEx? DHL?
Which one deals with the large freight? Old dominion?
In college my best friend and I passed out in his bed and when I woke up he was laying on me with his head in my chest. He woke up and was just like “you good bro?” And I was like “I’m good” and then we both fell asleep again and stayed in that position until we woke up for real. Never talked about it after haha. I was in a fraternity in college to so the line between straight and gay was always blurred lol
Platonic cuddles.
That’s kinda wholesome actually.
When I was 17 I lived in Israel for a year and I would frequently visit an older gentleman (who was my tour guide) and his family in Tel Aviv. He knew I was looking for Israeli women to talk to, so he sent me to a specific area on the coast. I was looking pretty nice and just sat on a bench. Within 30 minutes, I had 4 different gentlemen walk up and start talking to me. 2 of them sat next to me and made very quick advances and I had to explain to them I wasn’t gay. The fourth finally explained that this was a well known spot for gay men to meet. Cheeky bastard that Doron was.
Thats an excellent prank hahaha
I had a buddy as a teen. He was a bit older. I was 15 he was about 22. One day we’re smoking a joint and he tells me to turn off the lights so we could smoke. I’m like wtf, it’s dark already in here. I’m like nah I’m good. So I left. I was super uncomfortable because I caught the vibe right away. What was scary was he had me by like 80lbs and a few inches taller. He literally could’ve forced himself on me. Long story shortened is he’s doing 44 years in jail for rape of a minor in Oregon. He wound up as a teachers aide in high school and raped a student. Very close to the age I was when we stopped being friends.
Use to jerk off with my friend in high school all the time
There were a group of guys from my middle school that used to do this. They called them selves “The Meat Thugz” the rumors were they had to show their “meat” in order to be part of the group and they were given a nickname based on the way it looked. If I’m remembering correctly one of the “Thugz” name was Elephant meat, because well… it looked like an elephant trunk.
Jerked off a guy and let him suck me during a threesome
I slept with a guy out of curiosity. I am no longer curious... I am definitely straight
I kissed a guy. I needed to see if being attracted to the same gender as myself might appeal to me and if it was because I hadn't realised I was into guys that I hadn't gotten a girlfriend. So, I kissed him once, and then with some passion - some tongue slipped in as well and he was really into it. I wasn't. I knew INSTANTLY. I wasn't gay. But he was bisexual.
Haha that was anticlimactic
I had a guy grope me in a concert. I was 18 at the time. Athlectic and lean but with big thighs and ass from running and cycling a lot. I told him he had no right to grope anyone without their consent and that he could have gotten punched. He apologised and I moved on.
Yeah that's assault.
HS wrestling we used to use a shower room. One of our guys was a “show-er” not a grower. He used to hit the helicopter and fling water from his dick onto other guys
If i found a legitimate sugar daddy, I would do things. This 9-5 shit is ridiculous.
Was at a school camp when I was 15/16 and it only had a communal shower. Entered alone and soon there were around 20 naked dudes my age showering out in the open. Had never really seen naked people irl, so it was a bit awkward. Awoke something in me that I still haven't dealt with.
Damn you’re still hard to this day?
I 'm a straight older guy and I marched in the Pride parade last weekend. It was a spontaneous thing. I drove my grandson into town for his music lesson, which was right on the parade route. So once I parked I had 90 minutes to kill and walked to the start of the parade just before it kicked off. So many happy people, all kinds of costumes and causes. The spirit of the thing moved me, so I asked a group if I could walk with them. They handed me a rainbow heart paddle and I marched with them about 3/4 of a mile right back to the music school. Timing was perfect and arrived as my grandson was finishing up. The folowing week at work, I found the group's webite for homeless youth and submitted a matching donation through my company DE&I dept. To add, I have some close family members who are gay and I felt like I should support them in a small way.
Thats not a gayest thing. Thats wholesome af. Good on you!
Not very gay, but very inclusive and respectful.
I never participated, but a few of my friends from middle school would watch porn on a TV and yank their shit side by side on the couch until they all finished.
I went to a bar with my wife to play pool, it's our weekly "get-away" from the kids. I finish my beer and head into the bathroom, pick a urinal and start relieving myself. Big dude walks in, makes a grunting sound pulling his pants down and situating himself at the next urinal, then looks over and says "You have a really nice looking penis." In the softest tone I've ever heard from a man.
Realised 20 years after the fact that my buddy at Uni was probably in love with me. Wanted to go clubbing just with me Got really shitty when I picked up women His last words to me were kinda like being dumped by an upset girlfriend.
I had a friend in HS who I also roomed with in my early 20s who was like this with me. We would hang out constantly together, good buds. Didn't notice any issues with random girls over but when I started really dating my GF/now my wife, he got pretty shitty about it & I moved out shortly thereafter. I just turned 57. It dawned on me maybe a week ago that he might've been into me. John, I'm sorry. I had no idea.
I've sucked a few cocks, but like, just to be friendly. No homo
You don’t want to be rude
friendliness is a skill my friend
When I was 13 my best friend told me a story about the time him and his friends were hanging out one night and they decided all to sit around the living room while jerking themselves under blankets while watching porn. One of them nutted in the hallway unexpectedly and a little brother at about 8 years old accidentally slipped on it and hit their head. They refuse to talk about it when I bring it up .
Easy. Being told point-blank at a house party by one of my sister’s very drunk and very outspoken married gay friends in her empty kitchen, “Come with me to the bathroom. I’ll suck your dick so good you’ll forget you have a wife.” I did not come with him to the bathroom as requested. He was very serious and got pretty upset that I shot him down. Somewhere buried in my text logs was the novel he wrote me the next morning apologizing for being so forward… but that if I ever changed my mind to let him know.
One day I was chilling with my GF (now an ex) when I saw a dick pic pop up on her phone. Initially I was pissed off but when we got together she had already warned me during that awkward early stage of just being fuck buddies. Anyway, she adds me to the chat one day because she knows I'd love to have a threesome one day. After around 6 months, she's barely active in this chat and it's just two guys hanging out, sharing wanking videos and porn from time to time. He was much more towards bisexuality than me and often told me how he wants to suck my cock but would probably never actually do it. And to make it all better, we've got a lot of mutual friends and (I think) none of them know about our escapades.
Was at a pride parade in Houston and had a guy dressed as Luigi run by and grab my dick and balls and run off into the crowd. I kinda just stood there for a second not knowing whether to be mad or just laugh at wat happened.
Kissing the homies good night
One of my friends dared me and my other friend to kiss each other on the lips for 2 bucks. It was just a quick peck. Used the prize money to buy another round of beer for me and the guy I kissed. Best 2 bucks I spent.
The Boy Scouts in the “good old days”. Fellow scouts who were leaders in the troop preyed on us under the guise of “just boys being boys figuring things out”. The second time one started jacking off in front of me in a tent at summer camp I was done.
I'm hoping serious means it actually happened, rather than serious in tone lol. If not feel free to remove. Was at a work happy hour a few months back and kissed one of my coworkers. We were walking home with a mixed group and reached the metro, which only half of us were taking. We're saying goodbye and one of the others says "you wont kiss!!". We're all pretty drunk at this point so he and I just look at each other, shrug and go for a quick peck, followed by saying something like "how about that!". We still laugh about it.
For a guy I'm always told I have nice feet. Well a relatively new friend of mine, we were sitting around having a few beers and I kept scrunching and rotating my feet in circles and buddy says, I give a mean foot massage....I chuckled. Got a foot massage by a 6'7 dude. Ngl...no shit, big hands gave the best foot massage I've ever had, better than the ex's (all female) ever gave me lmao. I should add he used lotion as well.
My best friend kissing my cheek and telling me he loves me, I said love you too man!