Isn’t it interesting the inverse effects that it has? My parents were the same and I feel like I had very similar experiences. Despite that being contrary to what they were probably hoping for
I will never appreciate it. It feels like every decision I make, even now as an adult, is tinged with their expectations and judgments. It's suffocating. I get that they wanted the best for me, but their constant monitoring and control over every aspect of my life has left me feeling like I can't fully be myself. I know they mean well, but I wish they understood that their version of success isn't necessarily mine.
Strict about all the wrong things
I was raised by the internet with little to no parental guidance, I ended up in some pretty sketch sitiuations
But god forbid my grades suffer because of undiagnosed learning disorders and mental illness
my parents were very strict growing up. i had a lot of rules and very little freedom compared to my friends. at the time, it was frustrating and I often felt suffocated. however, looking back, i appreciate their strictness because it taught me discipline, respect for others, and the importance of hard work. those values have helped me achieve my goals and navigate life’s challenges
No rules at all, I hated it. My parents were Alchies and smoked weed and let us do whatever we wanted. I never grew up and have no boundaries. I’m an alchie, addict, video game junkie. I don’t know how my husband puts up with me to be honest. We’re retired and have no kids, no responsibilities, but I’m still annoying and working on my addictions. I’m in therapy and really want to change. Rules are important, I really needed some because now I’m a real cunt.
I’m not all bad, I tend to go overboard on everything. But really , I was the oldest and I was the adult, I always worried about everyone. Made sure people were fed, diapers on the young changed, and kids put to bed and bathed. It was a lot and made me not want my own kids. I’m retired early now and I just like to play video games and have zero responsibilities.
My parents were pretty strict growing up in comparison to my classmates and friends. Most of my peers were scared of my parents, including me. I’m older now, and looking back, I wouldn’t say I don’t appreciate it. I do, and I feel like everyday I understand more and more about them. I think their expectations and their behaviors have kept me down a path that I can flourish in as an adult. However, there are definitely traits instilled in me from their “strictness” that I wish weren’t.
My parents weren't at all and I only really appreciated it when my oldest child turned about two. That's around when they start to become independent enough where they're playing and making small decisions on their own.
My wife grew up in a very different kind of household with very strict parents and our parenting styles are very, very different. I love my wife but every molehill is a mountain for her. Any minor infraction is enough to get her screaming, take away all toys, and punish the kids for the rest of the day.
The funny part is we've talked about this repeatedly in the 15 years we've been parents and she agrees with me that my way is better. I have a close relationship with my parents. More importantly, I've always felt that I could go to my parents with any problem I had. Their first instinct was always to help me, not punish me. My wife has almost no relationship with her parents and her divorced father moved across the country without even telling her or her siblings. She would never go to them for help. Admitting a problem to her parents, no matter how trivial, was the kind of thing that got her locked in her room with no TV (phones and internet didn't exist then) for a full summer.
Despite her knowledge that my way is better she still instinctively flies off the handle at any minor rule breaking until I come over, explain that what happened was not a big deal, and we want our children to trust us.
TL;DR: Not at all and yes.
My parents were so strict and toxic that they’d go through my texts and phone every day. If there was a number they didn’t recognize, they’d call it. If they felt like they weren’t getting a clear picture, they’d show up to my school and track down people who’d know me between classes.
Now? They aren’t allowed near my kids
We didn't have phones, but my mom would "clean" my room. She found notes and pictures. I moved out at 20. I moved back home when I was 23 and she still would look through my room. And I quickly moved out again.
Yikes! I was only allowed a flip phone through HS.Eventually started communicating with my friend over email, because it was faster and they all had smart phones anyway
My dad was in Vietnam and I was the youngest my mother was tired of raising children. If I did anything I mean anything like eat too much candy my mother would tell me when my father gets back he's going to beat me for it. I remember sitting by myself watching the courtship of Eddie's father dreaming about what it would be like to have a father in my life. Today I still have nightmares about some of the things she did to me. So no I don't appreciate anything and I'm glad she's dead and gone.
I never appreciated it and they’re so much worse now than they used to be and I absolutely resent/hate my mom for it.
My dad didn’t give a flying fuck and still doesn’t but my mom is a control freak
[удалено]
Isn’t it interesting the inverse effects that it has? My parents were the same and I feel like I had very similar experiences. Despite that being contrary to what they were probably hoping for
I will never appreciate it. It feels like every decision I make, even now as an adult, is tinged with their expectations and judgments. It's suffocating. I get that they wanted the best for me, but their constant monitoring and control over every aspect of my life has left me feeling like I can't fully be myself. I know they mean well, but I wish they understood that their version of success isn't necessarily mine.
That feeling never goes away. I'm doing well now because I created my own success. Didn't finish college? (Gasp)
This.
Strict about all the wrong things I was raised by the internet with little to no parental guidance, I ended up in some pretty sketch sitiuations But god forbid my grades suffer because of undiagnosed learning disorders and mental illness
No, I don't. She used to be nuts. She still is but she used to be too.
I appreciate what you did there
My parents were super strict, and at the time, I hated it, but looking back, I think it kept me out of a lot of trouble.
my parents were very strict growing up. i had a lot of rules and very little freedom compared to my friends. at the time, it was frustrating and I often felt suffocated. however, looking back, i appreciate their strictness because it taught me discipline, respect for others, and the importance of hard work. those values have helped me achieve my goals and navigate life’s challenges
No rules at all, I hated it. My parents were Alchies and smoked weed and let us do whatever we wanted. I never grew up and have no boundaries. I’m an alchie, addict, video game junkie. I don’t know how my husband puts up with me to be honest. We’re retired and have no kids, no responsibilities, but I’m still annoying and working on my addictions. I’m in therapy and really want to change. Rules are important, I really needed some because now I’m a real cunt.
This is an interesting flip-side that hasn’t been shared yet, thank you!
I’m not all bad, I tend to go overboard on everything. But really , I was the oldest and I was the adult, I always worried about everyone. Made sure people were fed, diapers on the young changed, and kids put to bed and bathed. It was a lot and made me not want my own kids. I’m retired early now and I just like to play video games and have zero responsibilities.
Extremely and considering I barely speak to them. No I don’t appreciate it now.
Seems to be the norm with strict parents
My parents were pretty strict growing up in comparison to my classmates and friends. Most of my peers were scared of my parents, including me. I’m older now, and looking back, I wouldn’t say I don’t appreciate it. I do, and I feel like everyday I understand more and more about them. I think their expectations and their behaviors have kept me down a path that I can flourish in as an adult. However, there are definitely traits instilled in me from their “strictness” that I wish weren’t.
My parents weren't at all and I only really appreciated it when my oldest child turned about two. That's around when they start to become independent enough where they're playing and making small decisions on their own. My wife grew up in a very different kind of household with very strict parents and our parenting styles are very, very different. I love my wife but every molehill is a mountain for her. Any minor infraction is enough to get her screaming, take away all toys, and punish the kids for the rest of the day. The funny part is we've talked about this repeatedly in the 15 years we've been parents and she agrees with me that my way is better. I have a close relationship with my parents. More importantly, I've always felt that I could go to my parents with any problem I had. Their first instinct was always to help me, not punish me. My wife has almost no relationship with her parents and her divorced father moved across the country without even telling her or her siblings. She would never go to them for help. Admitting a problem to her parents, no matter how trivial, was the kind of thing that got her locked in her room with no TV (phones and internet didn't exist then) for a full summer. Despite her knowledge that my way is better she still instinctively flies off the handle at any minor rule breaking until I come over, explain that what happened was not a big deal, and we want our children to trust us. TL;DR: Not at all and yes.
My mom was great, but for a long while my step-dad was a total narcissist
My parents were so strict and toxic that they’d go through my texts and phone every day. If there was a number they didn’t recognize, they’d call it. If they felt like they weren’t getting a clear picture, they’d show up to my school and track down people who’d know me between classes. Now? They aren’t allowed near my kids
that's next level crazy...
We didn't have phones, but my mom would "clean" my room. She found notes and pictures. I moved out at 20. I moved back home when I was 23 and she still would look through my room. And I quickly moved out again.
Yikes! I was only allowed a flip phone through HS.Eventually started communicating with my friend over email, because it was faster and they all had smart phones anyway
I meant cell phones were not around yet. I'm old.
Not that strict, but strict. I appreciate it now because I got to where I needed to go and I turned out great(ish)
No strictness, no punishment. No problem.
My dad was in Vietnam and I was the youngest my mother was tired of raising children. If I did anything I mean anything like eat too much candy my mother would tell me when my father gets back he's going to beat me for it. I remember sitting by myself watching the courtship of Eddie's father dreaming about what it would be like to have a father in my life. Today I still have nightmares about some of the things she did to me. So no I don't appreciate anything and I'm glad she's dead and gone.
I never appreciated it and they’re so much worse now than they used to be and I absolutely resent/hate my mom for it. My dad didn’t give a flying fuck and still doesn’t but my mom is a control freak