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Because clearly we only like dumb pointless things and they have objectively brilliant practical tastes and we're wasting their precious time by enjoying ourselves
I’d also argue that the sons interests have to be traditionally masculine for boomer dads to be ok with it. So you could talk about guns or whatever and even if that boomer isn’t super into it they probably would be perfectly fine with it.
I find it hilarious they did that out of straight up homophobia and all it accomplished was a lot of gay guys who know how to build shit or hunt or fix cars
I bought a $10,000 50 BMG rifle just to piss off my Boomer in law. “You want to see a mans gun, I’ll show you a mans gun,” *pulls out Barrett M82A1*
They’re very alt right and I had the pleasure of being there for a conversation where he and his gravy buddies were talking about body armor and if they had “take back control of things” and I’m a leftist dude and they know it and I told them “I have the cure for that (went and got the rifle), body armor won’t save any pussy that shows up to my house in body armor, just BAM straight through the chest body armor and all,” shit got real quiet that day.
Screwing with Boomers is fun as hell.
My alt-right uncle and grandpa are always surprised I own and enjoy firearms. I tell them, "Why wouldn't I? They're cool, fun to take to the range, I'm a responsible owner, and - worst case scenario - I can protect my family with them. You and I just have different ideas about who should be able to access what weapons and what we might need to defend ourselves from."
Fuckin exactly! They say immigrants are the problem, and they are, just not the ones *they* are talking about. Unless you're Native American or Mexican, you are an immigrant. And most African Americans were hostages, who didn't get the choice about whether or not they wanted to come here.
The hilarious part is that my job in tech is 80% plus immigrants. Most of them got a gun after about a year of Trump. They were basically scared a racist wack job would try to hurt them and their family after Trump riled them up. Can’t say I blamed them honestly, I could see their point of view. They all went to the range and all had guns that were geared toward anti personal work.
I just think it's hilarious all these boomers think they can defend themselves from tanks, fighter jets, missiles and massive weapons that fire 5000 rounds a minute and turn people into red mist.
They can't,it's just no, they'll be absolutely helpless.
It's like when you ask a guy which animal they can fight barehanded and they immediately jump to lion's and bears,like no,just stop. You can do nothing for either situations.
(Edit: i forgot to add battleships, aircraft carriers,submarines and many variations of ridiculously armed helicopters
And their counterpoint is always the Viet Cong and the Taliban. Like, these people experience emotional breakdowns when McDonald’s gets their order wrong.
If you live within a mile of anyone else, PLEASE choose your ammunition wisely!!! Hollow tip or a wide-choke shotgun with a light load. You do NOT want to miss and end up killing the baby sleeping in a crib three blocks away because nothing else was able to stop the bullet and keep it from going through a wood-and-sheetrock wall.
A bullet that can punch through several inches of tough deer muscle to hit a heart will go right through a wall. Load carefully in city limits, please!!!!!
People like that tend to get all in on talking about what they'll do and stuff. But their scenarios are always the "librals" are cowering and essentially waiting to be executed. It short circuits their brains to think that the people they very openly talk about straight up murdering, might actually fight back with deadly force.
Like, they think because we favor responsible gun ownership and things like background checks, it means we would be defenseless. Many liberals also own guns, they just don't make it their whole personality and tell EVERYONE about them.
In fact it's *why* I'm lefty, and maybe why I'm loony 😂
As I pointed out in the recent post about how boomers relate to military service, if they served, most of them were peacetime veterans. I had pre-deployment proficiency training a minimum of every 3 years. I don't think my dad had any military training with guns after Basic. Now he and my stepmom CCW when they come to dinner in my big, scary city, while I can say "that was fireworks, you can tell from the sizzle sound. More meatloaf?"
Yep. I have a revolver in my closet. Most people don't even know I own it. My stepdad gave it to me as he knew I always wanted it as a big fan of the old Peacemakers(big Clint Eastwood and old westerns guy). It's very similar to one. But I have absolutely no need to discuss it with anyone, much less brag about it. I find that shit childish and foolish.
Im in Texas, most of my "liberal" friends have guns and know how to use them. I have a leftist friend who has automatic weapons and trains with them often
I live in a house with a pre-boomer/war baby (my dad) and my children who are a bi-woman, and a trans man and I am on that spectrum too. We have several guns in the home, and we *all* know how to use them safely. We are also 3 Democrats & an independent.
I dare someone to come to my home trying to start trouble. My dad & I are sharp shooters, both of us have served in the military, and we are both *exceptionally* protective of our family. You'll see mama bear come out of me *really quickly*
No no no NO NO!!!
LIBERALS can’t own guns. LIBERALS can’t like guns. Liberals are afraid of guns and will cower in fear and beg for their lives when we take back the country.
You are messing with my world view.
Quit it.
/sarcasm.
I've never fired a Barrett, but i have fired guns and yes, firearms of all shapes and sizes pack a whole lot of fucking punch
which is why...they need to be used RESPONSIBLY.
people can be against gun legislation. it is what it is. what pisses me off more is that so many of these dipshits treat guns so recklessly, like it's a fucking trophy and status symbol. No man...it's a fucking weapon. I would take you a lot more seriously if you treated it with the responsibility and care that is necessary
I also have an absolute shitload of binary explosives for target shooting and use it for that. It’s fun, I bought it to be petty but I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t my favorite gun.
lol lesbian here that knows stuff about cars, concrete and house fixing things. They expect a lot of people in the family to know about cars. My sister and I wasn't interested in cars and went more arts/technology.
See, my parents were both deadheads, so I kinda don't get all the stuff that goes on here simply because parents didn't do any of the things here. They are super mellow people who just live and love. I also feel bad af for all the people here who didn't have the loving and supportive parents I had growing. I know it's a privilege that I had the parents I had, and I definitely try not to take it for granted.
My parents weren't deadheads or hippies... they were really kinda square. But they were loving parents and very encouraging and supportive towards me, my brother, my wife, my children. I miss them a lot.
Yeah my dad passed in 2015 and there isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about him. The dude was the most badass, tough as nails, but a giant teddy bear I have ever met. I miss him daily but revel in the things he taught me. He always told me "no one is ever truly gone if you remember them."
Much love to you fellow redditor. Big hugs to all those who have lost their parents from death or NC we are all in this shit together. Let's try to love each other.
I spent my entire ride to the dentist last week with my father talking all about his new pistol that doesn't have a safety like 1 I don't care and 2 that sounds like a terrible idea for someone with as little patience as he has.
Whether I’m into someone’s passions, interests or hobbies or I’m not if they’re proud of it and want to tell me i encourage it and ask questions I wanna see people do well with the things that’s keep their flame burning
"what do you mean you're not absolutely fascinated by expensive to maintain cars from 20 years before you were born? Put down that book of birds and the binoculars your plans just changed we're going to the garage!"
Here's the kicker though, if you know more than they do on a topic they think they know better in, it goes over their heads and they don't want to talk to you anymore or get irrationally angry because they can't compete.
Ever dealt with one who's been doing a hobby for years but everything they know about it is completely outdated, dangerous or flat out wrong? Came up a lot in tarantula keeping.
All the time!
I see it in tech where one of them tries to "correct" me with their own bad practice they learned 30 years ago. But when they create a security issue because they found a flash drive on the floor and wanted to see what was on it, I'm the idiot.
Like my mom getting pissed at me for putting the hamster she bought my son in a decent sized cage instead of the crittertrail deathtrap she bought. Apparently now she thinks the entire thing was a waste of money and is irrationally annoyed if I even mention it.
Reminds me of the Facebook friend I had a few years back. She scolded me for buying my son’s betta a 10 gallon aquarium because “they prefer small dirty cups of water! That’s what they live in in nature!” Dude… no.
You also see it constantly in musicianship. Not dangerous, obviously, but the amount of people who own dozens of guitars they can’t really play is hilarious.
Boomer "guitarists" who can only play smoke on the water but have countless rare or well made guitars are definitely artificially driving up prices.
Like cool Kevin, you've had a 69 scrimbly scringus blue face Les Paul that was only issued in a batch of 50 sat gathering dust for 30 years that you don't let your son play because he'll only play that damn heavy metal racket even though he's way better than you ever were
Me being a trans woman and knowing more about the history and mechanics of firearms than my dad does be like. (I don't own any cuz my partner doesn't want any in the house and I can't afford to rent a range locker, about which I am big sad)
Don't forget they expect you to be an extension of them. If you have likes interest or goals that different from theirs for real life you aren't dumb and they will eventually die
My Boomer brothers yelled at me to shut up even if I wasn’t talking to them. I grew up thinking I wasn’t allowed to have interests. I hid evidence of anything I was into. Then they claimed I was a really boring person. Couldn’t win.
Also, most of them never thought about their children as actual people, only as property they felt obligated to produce
EDIT: the personal reflections below have struck me profoundly. I’ll be forever grateful for the parents/family I had; I wish everyone was able to say that.
And I wish all y’all the love and support you were cruelly denied.
Can confirm.
Mom tried to use me as, in her own words, “A weapon to use against your father.”
I was never a person to her.
Dad…Well, he gets upset if anyone else does something he wants to do or is more successful than he is.
Brother got a gaming computer for christmas one year. Back when they first started being a thing. Quad Cores, I think. He (Dad) had a better, newer one by January.
He also offered to get me a job at his work once, then screamed at me that I wasn’t about to “ruin his career” so he made sure I never even GOT an interview…all because I grasped what he was showing me “too quickly.”
We don’t really talk much anymore.
That’s okay. I’m somehow nothing like either one of them.
My Mother died a while back. I didn’t go. No regrets there. Dad’s still a narcissistic man child but…I have the best stepmom ever. Only reason I still talk to my Dad, really.
She always was there for me, and while I call her by her first name, I call her Mom on Mother’s Day. Because she’s the only real Mom I had.
Already planned to! We lost my stepbrother (medical issue and her first born) a year ago on the 25th (26th is my birthday and I’m turning the same age he was.) So I’m planning to do whatever she wants this year. It needs to be special.
Whole day, up to her. Anything she wants to do, or has wanted to do…we’re gonna do.
I can’t replace my brother, would never try to, but I can damn well make sure he’s remembered and make sure that she’s as taken care of as she’s taken care of me.
She deserves that much, at least.
100% my mother has never been shy about this fact either. I wasn't a happy accident or an accident at all I am a well thought out, planned and executed tool for maintaining my mother's emotional needs and an extension of her. Like a personal assistant that's not allowed to have thoughts or needs. My only need is what do I need to make Mother happy again.
Hey u/Andidroid18 your mother is on line 7. She says she just got the car washed and needs you to stand by it with an umbrella while she's working to ensure the birds don't poop on it.
This is scarily similar to my wife's relationship with her mom. We apparently aren't allowed to be our own people, and we apparently live to serve her every emotional need. I'm roped in now since I married into that family.
We've been working on boundaries with my in-laws and my parents, all of whom are boomers, but damn it is so hard when they're so self centered and self serving in every aspect of life
Since the '50s. The Me generation gave themselves the name baby boomers because they didn't like the name that their parents gave them. Now they don't like that their children are using Boomer against them.
I said this in another comment, but I'm a firm believer they think life is a competition and no two people can be standing on the same step of life at the same time. You're either above them, or below them. If someone is happy or successful, it means they've gone down a notch.
My parents have finally gotten a little better at listening to subjects that aren't their interests, but it has taken them until the twilight of their lives to do so.
This is a huge reason that my dad and I have no real relationship. If I don't pick a topic that he is personally interested in, he basically ignores me altogether. Always has.
This is yet another way I try to use them as an inspiration to parent differently than they did. I will routinely listen to my kids talk at length about subjects I couldn't possibly care less about. I want them to know that they are important to me.
This is the way.
Honestly, I *love* hearing little kids talk about something they're into. I don't need to know anything about it to enjoy their energy and passion. Did Boomers never feel this about their own kids??
I agree. It's great to hear them be passionate.
I can admit that sometimes, I may not want to hear my sixteen year old rant about the latest YouTuber controversy or the drama in his discord server. Okay.
My fourteen year old is a full on socialist that thinks that Marx is horribly misunderstood. They love to go on and on about Bolshevik this and the workers that.
None of these things interest me at all. But my kids do, so I listen and ask questions.
I remember my mom fondly. She would engage in my hobbies even if she didn’t understand them. Like anime conventions she’d go to. She lived the costumes people would make, and would take pictures and enjoy stuff. She was the only family member who didn’t dismiss my hobbies.
Now my dad would always make comments like, “aren’t you to old for those cartoons”. I never tried introducing him to what I love after that. Now I’m just sad my mom was the one to pass while he’s still alive. I do love him, but I honestly don’t see myself being to dad when he passes eventually.
My mother thought I was perpetually five.
Like thanks, mom but pokemon hasn't been a core interest for over a decade and it only lasted that long because you kept shoving the games at me when you were trying to buy my forgiveness. Can I get a book instead next time? Or socks? You can never go wrong with socks.
I relate to this so much. I’m 45F. I have an empty space in my soul where my dad should be, because it’s easier getting a conversation out of a rock. He was trad dad, leaving mom to do the child rearing. I remember him teaching me math and cursive before I started kindergarten, and he read some books to me. I can remember those early memories because there are so few concentrated interactions with him afterwards.
You can talk to him about his interests, but he has no comment for any of mine. Or if he does say something, it’s snarky. So many things in my life - no comment about those, either.
Dad never taught me how to use tools like he did my brother, I guess because I’m *a girl*. My brother taught me a lot of things my dad should have.
I love making things, and I bought myself a scroll saw. I made a small finger joint box. My dad was so surprised, and suddenly we were having conversations about it. He asked me all kinds of questions, because the scroll saw is one tool he didn’t have. And then he’s so shocked I wanted to learn how to use the lathe, and we were on it. I loved it and hated it at the same time, because here I was in my *40s* and he is finally spending time with me.
And all I could do was bitter cry to my husband and tell him that it was like dad finally saw me for the first time.
I love finding out what our kids are involved in. I helped our daughter make a mushroom hat for the upcoming Renaissance festival. Our son and I send each other music to listen to. Both are great artists. Even if I don’t enjoy something they’re into, it’s important to them, and that’s what matters. It’s not that hard to ask positive questions and give encouragement.
That's the thing. It's not hard to ask relevant questions and make a few comments.
I can't imagine not wanting to be involved in my kids' lives. But he never has.
My mom occasionally sees the grandkids, usually only if I bring them to her, but whatever. If my dad had his way, the next time I see him will be when I carry his coffin to a hole. And this isn't new, it's always how he has been.
> This is a huge reason that my dad and I have no real relationship. If I don't pick a topic that he is personally interested in, he basically ignores me altogether. Always has.
Yeesh, this exactly describes my boomer dad too.
I try to do this for my kids. Wasn't so good at faking an interest with my oldest (edit: I tried but he could tell I was doing it for his benefit like) and I feel bad because he is able to tell when he's info dumping and will apologize. But I had practice and now my youngest has no idea I do not give a fraction of a shit about minecraft. He genuinely believes I was fascinated and grateful for the education.
My late mother never missed an opportunity to ridicule my collection of action figures and collectibles from video games and movies I like. "I never thought I'd still be buying my 40-something son toys for his birthday!"
Yet she was completely oblivious to the fact that my collection serves for me the exact same purpose her massive collection of glass hummingbirds served for her. 🤦🏻♂️
My mother was like this too.
Watching TV was her hobby. Watched TV all day in her retirement. But couldn't fathom me spending a few hours playing a videogame. Treated it like something kids do.
My parents watch tv for over five hours a day but lose their shit when they visit me or vice versa and see me play video games before bed. Calling it ‘poison’
They're narcissistic by nature, but they also divide hobbies into "adult hobbies" and "children's pursuits." And pets that aren't dogs or cats are for children, not adults. So you're not just getting "your hobby is weird." You're also getting "your hobby shows that you're not a mature adult--which I, as a boomer, know because nobody but boomers are mature adults."
Edit to add, plus if you're a guy, pets are for girls, so you're a Insert Homophobic Expletive.
Uh ya, sorry one issue with your comment, if a grown ass man cant enjoy his kid loving and talking about their pet. No way in HELL is that man gunna give 2 shits about a cat.
To them Cats are all female because they are for women.
As a 29yr dude who's best friend and cat passed this year, anyone who ignores the companionship and love capabilities of a feline friend is honestly missing out, but I Wai I could say I feel bad for them except they are probably sparing a cat from a miserable home 🙃
My MIL does this and it is infuriating. I like high end figurines and she will not even consider purchasing one of any kind because they are dolls. Her son? Here are 4 pairs of collectable sneakers for your wall. Will never concede that they are the same thing really.
Icing? What is all over her place but Gd precious moments.
But also all children should be enthralled by their adult hobbies.
My dad is really into model trains and I have had to explain to him many, many times that my sons are NOT.
He has a huge collection and one day asked me to come collect it for the boys, he had run out of room. He was personally offended that my 9 and 12 year old didn't want his trains. Fckn clueless.
Absolutely. Though, I think that's largely age more than generation. There's also a generational tendency to not be interested in whatever The Olds are.
Growing up I’ve always loved Lego. Of course my parents were unkind about it. Now they don’t know their only set of grandchildren and our kids have a light up dollhouse made of Lego that is over five feet high and 18 layers. Our kids are grown and nearly 18 and care much more about the dollhouse I made them than the selfish set of grandparents who can’t even remember birthdays for the kids.
i was just listening to a podcast that mentioned that back in the 1950s, there was an obsession with men infantilizing women. I'm not just talking about chauvinism, i'm talking straight up borderline pedophilia. Versus a big trait of masculinity was to "grow up" as soon as possible.
the host was saying that the research she did on this topic led her to believe this is one of the main reasons why pink became a "girlie color." Before, babies used to be dressed up in blue or pink regardless of gender (white was actually the most common, as was yellow). She theorized that this idea that women mentally and emotionally stayed child-like and girly whereas boys were supposed to "grow up," is what caused pink to be associated with girls when it was previously just associated with babies. it also, over time, also might have been why pink for boys is so much more stigmatized than blue for girls
i bring this up because i think this weird emotional constipation of the 1950s is a big reason for so much dumb shit and warped ass views on "what it means to be a man."
When I was younger I was a big car guy. I still like them but I’m more fiscally responsible now. Anyway… didn’t matter who I was talking to or how long the conversation had been going on, if my mom heard me say anything about “cars” she would start chanting “CARS CARS CARS CARS CARS” loud enough that she became the center of attention.
I've always wondered how pulling up a recording of a baby crying would do.
Just make eye contact and play it. When they stop turn it off. If they start again play it again.
There are so many different types of lawyers.
The difference between the average private criminal defense atty and the average government agency attorney is like night and day.
My dad was a lawyer (just retired). Can confirm.
I (37F) was a voracious reader during my college and uni days. Like, what are you gonna do on your 2-hour public transit commute with complete strangers besides sleep or read? So I did both. But I also wrote a lot of fanfic at home. I think it was a decompressing mechanism, strangely enough. Wrote a lot for school for sure, but writing fanfic was for *me*. Dad would pass by my room where I was writing or see me reading in the living room or outside and he'd huff and puff that it's stupid and I won't ever make money out of it.
I'd tell him "hey dad, you saw The Firm and liked it, right? Did you know it was based on a book and it was written... by a lawyer?" He'd invariably reply that the author didn't work as hard as him obviously.
But he'd tell me alllll about the tech he was using or learning about and how much better than his firm's IT specialists he was because he did XYZ (for the record, no, he's not your typical "what is this" boomer when it comes to tech... He actually championed the switch to PDF and he's a power Acrobat and Access user). I'm the only one in the family who understands his tech jargon because I'm a graphic designer.
Aaaaanywho, so yeah to him reading/writing as a hobby is dumb.
I asked that once. He replied that because it's part of his job, it's senseless to do it as a hobby.
Like, I get it, it's not something he wants to do outside of work because he's all read/writing'd out. But then again hobbies are healthy, so let people enjoy what they enjoy even if they'll never see a dime from it. It literally kept me fucking sane in that madhouse (narcissist piece of work housewife mom, dad enabled her).
Omg! My hobby growing up was reading. Anything and everything I could get my hands on. My dad would catch me, take my book and send me outside to ‘play’. Eventually I had indoor books and outdoor books, then my mom finally told him to “leave him the fuck alone Roy, just because you can’t read for more than five minutes doesn’t mean that it’s stupid” and then slept on the couch every time he was a dick to me about reading. It took him some months but eventually he stopped being such a dick.
My mom used to tell me I was too old for toys. Age 12 and she would say things like “you should be playing with girls instead”. Well jokes on her, cause I grew up gay and married a toy collector. I have them all over my home, and we use them as decorations blended with Wooden art I also collect. It looks awesome IMO and it’s like repellent for my family so win win I guess. Still wonder what would have happened if I had parents who supported the things I loved instead of making me feel bad for liking them.
My mom used to do the same with my cats. Constant snide remarks and passive aggressive comments. Once, our door wasn't latched correctly and the wind blew it open, three of our newly rescued kittens got out and while we got two back quickly, it took over 24 hours for us to find the third. My mom would make comments like we had too many cats anyway and no big loss, etc. (Mind you, she didn't live with us and had nothing to do with any of our cats.) I finally snapped and yelled at her that we all got it, she hates my cats and would be happy if they were all dead, she made it perfectly clear. Of course, I hurt HER feelings and she never meant anything by it. She stopped mentioning them, though.
Honestly I’d like to hear more about these guinea pigs. My adult kid has a skinny pig, she let me use as a model for pictures of a dollhouse I built. I fell in love with its little happy noises. At least I hope they were happy noises.
What is her piggies name? I think skinny pigs are very cool. I just get scared to own one since I’d have to closely manage their temp (it gets very cold in the winter and my mom refuses to turn the heater on). I have two boars named Sir Pancakes and Professor Waffles. Sir Pancakes is an Abyssinian (sassy breed) and he thinks he is the boss of the cage. He is older and Professor Waffles likes to annoy him. Professor Waffles is spoiled and thinks HE is the boss of the cage. He is a lot smaller than Sir Pancakes but still tries to steal his lettuce and bell pepper. He also doesn’t like human affection as much. He runs away and wants back in the cage as soon as he runs out of veggies to eat. Sir Pancakes is more affectionate and lets me pet him. And does your daughter have anymore piggies?
I’ve had Guinea pigs my entire life. Anyone who tries to make you feel bad for having them and enjoying them is not someone you want to have in your life.
Also, anyone who says they only live for 2 years is an idiot. I’ve had people say “well MINE only lived for 2 years”
Well okay, you probably took awful care of it and it passed away due to neglect.
I lost my Guinea pig at almost 7 a couple of years ago and still miss him intensely. His name was Cheese and he was a very lightly toasted Himalayan (only the tip of his nose was a little toasty, and a few dark hairs on his ears.) He lived alone because he was supposedly not super cool with roommates, but he had an open cage and large c&c “yard” in the house and our cats hung out (literally snuggling and grooming him) with him all the time. He was a bossy, chunky guy with a huge personality. Guinea pigs are
awesome pets. I plan to adopt another one someday, hopefully a pair because I know it’s better for them if they tolerate each other.
If you enjoy anything outside their very narrow view of normal (sports, kids, church, mowing the lawn, cars) they immediately worry about WHAT WILL THE NEIGHBORS THINK. Plus I think that because they don't allow themselves to enjoy anything fully anyone who does is an affront to them because it makes them question why they don't do anything.
“What will the neighbors think?!” is such a huge deal to my parents. I got pregnant due to birth control failure and I was unmarried. I was also 23. I heard “what will everyone in hometown think?!” I was just like why do I care? I don’t live there. Sure enough, quite a few of the boomers in town were gossiping that I was knocked up by a Mexican.
My entire youth, my parents all acted like I was wasting my life playing video games all day.
1st of all... who fucking bought them? I never got an allowance.
2nd... I lived in a town of 300 people. There was fuck all to do. Oh wait... we got a Post Office in 91. Guess I was supposed to go there and hang out?
3rd... Every time you bastards took me out to do something, you either ridiculed me for not being able to do it right the first damn time... or something would piss you off so goddamned bad, you stayed pissed the whole day.
I would've loved to have gone fishing.... or riding ATVs... or Hunting... or whatever. But you taught me it was way better to keep my head down and stay out of your way. Because everything pissed you off, and eventually led to ass beatings.
So yeah... hanging out with Super Mario was preferable to anything you were offering.
Lol my parents were the same with videogames. They bought me my first console and games until I was 18, but they were shocked that I actually loved playing them. They still struggle to understand that I love videogames to this day.
So many lack theory of mind. If they were capable of it there wouldn’t be that pathological need to control others’ interests using negative comments. Let’s say you have a guinea pig and love your pet, is there any reason for someone to go on a tirade about how much they hate guinea pigs? Nope. The pet owner is going to be left with a lower opinion of the hater.
> Let’s say you have a guinea pig and love your pet, is there any reason for someone to go on a tirade about how much they hate guinea pigs? Nope. The pet owner is going to be left with a lower opinion of the hater.
The fact that they cannot imagine we are judging them and taking steps to limit our exposure is WILD.
Because they are angry people. It doesmt matter what you do, what you are interested in, or whatever. You could be an exact clone of them, and they would still find something to get mad at because they need to feel like they are better than you.
Even my asshole boomer dad liked my guinea pig. He called him a "guinea hog" and thought it was amusing that it would go "wheek wheek wheek" whenever someone opened the fridge.
This is my hot take in this (professional counselor and therapist by trade):
Most Boomers were probably raised by parents who didn't pay them any attention and also told, "Children are meant to be seen, not heard." In their minds, now that they are "the adults" in the room, everyone should shut up and listen. It's the typical, "I've done my time, and earned mine, so now everyone needs to suck it and listen to me."
Whereas younger generations figured out that it's not great to be ignored by your parents/others and some have developed the empathy of, "Oh, we really should learn to take interest in others instead of only talking about ourselves all the time." There's also a lot more literature and education/training about how active listening is the key to building positive relationships.
Again, painting with broad brush strokes and generalizing here.
I have met plenty of folks from all generations who have learned to listen and they are definitely the ones I have the most respect for.
Next time he brings up his car, tell him you feel like it's a bad investment. Be sure to add, "Especially with everything going on in the world today."
My mom doesn't get angry, she just gets this bored look on her face and stops engaging. She'll stare off into space or just start doing something else like reading.
They can't fathom it. They really can't understand that anyone thinks, does, or likes something different than what THEY like.
My Boomer mother would ask me about XYZ hobby/thing going on, then use whatever I told her as fuel for gossiping about me. Which she did CONSTANTLY.
Because they don't. Any time I have met a retiring boomer, they say, "What am I supposed to do now?" Bitch, get a fucking hobby! Paint! Do drugs! Have a personality past work.
One time, at a nice dinner at a high-end restaurant, my mom, my sister, and I were discussing a book we had all read. It was a nice, engaging conversation about the book/author.
My dad interrupted us to tell us that he and my brother felt left out of the conversation. He did this in front of my husband and sister-in-law, and it was very embarrassing and killed the vibe for the whole dinner. There were seven of us at that table, and three of us were engaged in a conversation. Nothing was stopping other people from talking to each other.
Sounds like my mother, even though she isn’t a boomer. She gets mad when I want to show her something, but I’m practically forced to pay attention to whatever she wants to show me. I don’t show her anything anymore, so I don’t pay attention to her anymore.
I loved ball pythons. I saved all my money to get a set up for a breeding pair. My grandparents hated everything I loved. Came home from work one day, and my whole set up and snakes were gone. No explanation, just that they didn't like them. I fear they dumped them in the woods behind our house to starve. I searched forever, but never found them or my tanks. I was devastated..
After something like that I'd cut contact with them completely. It's a good thing my family never did that, because I get feral when it comes to protecting my animals.
Frankly, I think it has more to do with the fact this generation is the most self-centered, hedonistic, entitled, greedy and jealous generation in history. Seeing you experiencing joy is offensive to them. All joy and pleasure, like money, should be for THEM. You have something they don't? They'll try to take it away.
Wish I was exaggering even a bit.
Because they do not have any interests.
They see you doing things you like instead of what you were told you should like, and your freedom and independence makes them angry. They are jealous of the individuality you display that they never had the guts to fight for.
It reminds them of the things they were too scared to do. The dreams they set aside to conform.
Once I was reading a book on some science subject. Mom came into my bedroom, looked at my book th n threw it down and whined "Why can't you read *girl* books?!"
Because they’re in an unhealthy mode of life where everything they don’t know or have interest in is irrelevant, stupid, and annoying.
It’s complete self-centeredness and incuriosity about others.
To a man I don’t know a single boomer with a hobby. Literally all they do is languish in their free time watching soap operas, drinking and doing housework.
It is inconceivable to me that you would spend the opportunity of having no work coupled with a decent retirement income and just waste it on nothing.
I’m sure there are exceptions but I’ve never met them.
My wife and I were visiting my parents and telling my dad about one cat who has diabetes and we have to give her insulin twice a day. He goes off on this tirade about how pets aren't people and you should just let them go and get a new one.
My mother has come up behind him and was listening to him. Also, I had a childhood cat, named Cat, who lived to be 21 years old.
Mom: Joe! How much money did you spend on Cat the last year of her life?
Dad: (literally sputters) That's...that's different. Cat was FAMILY!
Me: Dad, most people consider their pets to be family.
“Dad, if you expect me to take an interest in your hobbies like your cars, the least you can do is have the courtesy to listen when I’m talking about mine.”
I talk to my boomer parents and in-laws like children when they’re acting like children.
I also don’t tell my parents 90% of what’s going on in my life.
My late father( I loved him, may he rest in peace), was like that with mine and my siblings interests. He would go on and on about motorcycles, plains and trains, which we all found boring as shit. We had to listen though, otherwise he would pout like a toddler. Music now, he was dogmatic about music. He loved it, but he wasn’t open minded about any genre or musicians but the ones he liked. Mine and my siblings tastes in music were always garbage according to Dad. Especially when we were teenagers. I loved grunge, my brother loved death and black metal, and my sister likes R&B, and according to Dad, they were all no talent trash.
This is why I never, ever shit on my children’s interests in anything, unless something they took an interest in something that promoted hate, or any kind of harm.
Oh, I want in on this one. According to my boomer mom, my husband never bonds with our teenage son because they never do anything outside together. Nevermind that they spend hours and hours together playing video games. Clearly it can't be bonding because it doesn't involve someone throwing a ball outside.
Boomer logic.
My boomer dad still can't handle that whenever he praises me for being a "computer whiz" (i.e., I can do the most basic of things that he absolutely refuses to take 5 mins to learn), I point out a lot of it is thanks to my passion for the video games I played while growing up (that he absolutely hated and still thinks are a childish waste of time).
He thinks all the things I learned about computers came from study, like as if I sat down and read a compTIA text book and figured everything out that way.
The vast majority of things I know came from just messing around and needing to learn just enough to get the games to work on whatever I was trying to play them on.
He can't fathom hobbies, and the pursuit of enjoying them, can directly and indirectly lead to the acquisition of related knowledge/skills that have very practical applications.
I get that too. I like playing videogames and sometimes the occasional hike. But because I don't sit around the house smoking and watching Fox News, I'm lazy and uneducated.
My dad hated my guinea pigs. I got them in high school and went away for a few months when I was 18-19 and he sold them without telling me. Only found out on the car ride home.
I feel do bad for rats. They really got the short end of the stick. Treated as experiments and considered stupid filthy creatures by a majority of the population
My dad was always like that. There's no such thing as a morally neutral aesthetic preference; everything is either GOOD or BAD, and God help you if you like something he doesn't.
I actually didn't realize how awful he was about this when I was a kid, because we happened to share a lot of interests. I did know that he was very condescending about some people's hobbies, but I was obtuse, and hey, he was usually nice to me.
When I had kids and he just... shat all over every thing they tried to talk about... rolled his eyes and mocked them... his little grandkids, trying to show him a song they liked... it really crushed me.
https://preview.redd.it/3znvedk329zc1.jpeg?width=700&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e4c72b5faebaba35b617853ae1dd27f87f0f9cc8
How could you say no to that face.
I am just not allowed to talk to people at all when she’s around. At least not about anything she doesn’t like & not for longer than she thinks is appropriate.
I am 42 & she will apologize for me.
My dad kicked me out of his interests when I showed interest in something else. When I was a kid, he’d take me to classic cars meets all the time. I was fine with the cars, but enjoyed spending time with him. When I was a teenager, I got into music; both performing and listening. When my knowledge surpassed his, he just stopped inviting me to do anything involving cars. I’m in my mid thirties now and live in a city less than an hour away. I’ve played in a half dozen bands in the last 20 years or more, toured the US a couple times, played countless local shows, been flown out to festivals around the country…..never once been asked by my father about any of it. Never shown any interest in coming to a show, watching any of our videos online, hearing any of the music I make. But spent literally 45 minutes at Easter dinner gushing over some 29 year old guy he met at a car show that works in a welding shop and makes sculptures out of the scrap metal laying around. Like told me about every aspect of this guy’s life like he was Teddy Roosevelt or something.
oh wow, I just realized my husband (not a boomer, genx) does this to me!!
I garden, work with feral cat rescue, and own a software company. He taps his foot (as if he's impatient and wants me to be done talking) and rolls his eyes whenever I talk about these things.
His hobbies, however, are more important and interesting. Uh oh
Because we're only supposed to be for them. We aren't supposed to have thoughts, feelings, and lives of our own, we're supposed to serve them from as soon as we're able until they're dead. They're entitled to our bodies because they contributed their DNA and paid for our survival in a life they decided we should have, not that we chose.
Obviously this isn't every single one of them but far too many parents, especially boomer parents and before, see having children as a way to keep slaves, even if it isn't their conscious thought. They don't want children, they want dolls that will work for them.
We were had to flatter their egos. Not to continue the human race, not to improve america, hell not even to keep it going. We were made to be servants, and to fawn over them while they simultaneously disparaged their own parents (who for the most part were fairly cool.)
Nothing about boomerism makes sense until you understand their mindset. And that mindset is it's all about me
“Those vintage cars die 2 years after you buy them. What’s the use?”
Or just reply with “That’s nice, dear” as long as you think you can get away with it.
Source: I’m a 1961 model (late boomer), frequently a fool, and unafraid of fighting metaphorical fires with metaphorical gasoline. Feel free to laugh and ignore.
It's like when you tell them you wanna work less hours, and they ask you "Why? What you do you wanna do instead?" and you know it's a trick question cuz they're just waiting to ridicule and invalidate whatever it is you do on your free time.
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Because clearly we only like dumb pointless things and they have objectively brilliant practical tastes and we're wasting their precious time by enjoying ourselves
If we have interests, we're not paying attention to THEIR interests.
This is the correct response.
I’d also argue that the sons interests have to be traditionally masculine for boomer dads to be ok with it. So you could talk about guns or whatever and even if that boomer isn’t super into it they probably would be perfectly fine with it.
I find it hilarious they did that out of straight up homophobia and all it accomplished was a lot of gay guys who know how to build shit or hunt or fix cars
I bought a $10,000 50 BMG rifle just to piss off my Boomer in law. “You want to see a mans gun, I’ll show you a mans gun,” *pulls out Barrett M82A1* They’re very alt right and I had the pleasure of being there for a conversation where he and his gravy buddies were talking about body armor and if they had “take back control of things” and I’m a leftist dude and they know it and I told them “I have the cure for that (went and got the rifle), body armor won’t save any pussy that shows up to my house in body armor, just BAM straight through the chest body armor and all,” shit got real quiet that day. Screwing with Boomers is fun as hell.
My alt-right uncle and grandpa are always surprised I own and enjoy firearms. I tell them, "Why wouldn't I? They're cool, fun to take to the range, I'm a responsible owner, and - worst case scenario - I can protect my family with them. You and I just have different ideas about who should be able to access what weapons and what we might need to defend ourselves from."
Fuckin exactly! They say immigrants are the problem, and they are, just not the ones *they* are talking about. Unless you're Native American or Mexican, you are an immigrant. And most African Americans were hostages, who didn't get the choice about whether or not they wanted to come here.
Plus, the means of production won't sieze themselves, and asking nicely doesn't work.
The hilarious part is that my job in tech is 80% plus immigrants. Most of them got a gun after about a year of Trump. They were basically scared a racist wack job would try to hurt them and their family after Trump riled them up. Can’t say I blamed them honestly, I could see their point of view. They all went to the range and all had guns that were geared toward anti personal work.
I just think it's hilarious all these boomers think they can defend themselves from tanks, fighter jets, missiles and massive weapons that fire 5000 rounds a minute and turn people into red mist. They can't,it's just no, they'll be absolutely helpless. It's like when you ask a guy which animal they can fight barehanded and they immediately jump to lion's and bears,like no,just stop. You can do nothing for either situations. (Edit: i forgot to add battleships, aircraft carriers,submarines and many variations of ridiculously armed helicopters
And their counterpoint is always the Viet Cong and the Taliban. Like, these people experience emotional breakdowns when McDonald’s gets their order wrong.
They completely melted down when they were asked to wear a fucking *mask*.
If you live within a mile of anyone else, PLEASE choose your ammunition wisely!!! Hollow tip or a wide-choke shotgun with a light load. You do NOT want to miss and end up killing the baby sleeping in a crib three blocks away because nothing else was able to stop the bullet and keep it from going through a wood-and-sheetrock wall. A bullet that can punch through several inches of tough deer muscle to hit a heart will go right through a wall. Load carefully in city limits, please!!!!!
LOVE a responsible gun owner. 🥇
People like that tend to get all in on talking about what they'll do and stuff. But their scenarios are always the "librals" are cowering and essentially waiting to be executed. It short circuits their brains to think that the people they very openly talk about straight up murdering, might actually fight back with deadly force. Like, they think because we favor responsible gun ownership and things like background checks, it means we would be defenseless. Many liberals also own guns, they just don't make it their whole personality and tell EVERYONE about them.
Some of us loony lefty folks are veterans with decades of training.
In fact it's *why* I'm lefty, and maybe why I'm loony 😂 As I pointed out in the recent post about how boomers relate to military service, if they served, most of them were peacetime veterans. I had pre-deployment proficiency training a minimum of every 3 years. I don't think my dad had any military training with guns after Basic. Now he and my stepmom CCW when they come to dinner in my big, scary city, while I can say "that was fireworks, you can tell from the sizzle sound. More meatloaf?"
Yep. I have a revolver in my closet. Most people don't even know I own it. My stepdad gave it to me as he knew I always wanted it as a big fan of the old Peacemakers(big Clint Eastwood and old westerns guy). It's very similar to one. But I have absolutely no need to discuss it with anyone, much less brag about it. I find that shit childish and foolish.
Im in Texas, most of my "liberal" friends have guns and know how to use them. I have a leftist friend who has automatic weapons and trains with them often
I live in a house with a pre-boomer/war baby (my dad) and my children who are a bi-woman, and a trans man and I am on that spectrum too. We have several guns in the home, and we *all* know how to use them safely. We are also 3 Democrats & an independent. I dare someone to come to my home trying to start trouble. My dad & I are sharp shooters, both of us have served in the military, and we are both *exceptionally* protective of our family. You'll see mama bear come out of me *really quickly*
It's funny how surprised people get when they find out we own firearms too. The difference is we don't make them or entire personality.
This made me smile lmfao.
"Liberals are too pussy to ever pull the trigger!" https://i.redd.it/vgrhj9r7a9zc1.gif
“Why does everyone keep saying that!” *pulls trigger*
No no no NO NO!!! LIBERALS can’t own guns. LIBERALS can’t like guns. Liberals are afraid of guns and will cower in fear and beg for their lives when we take back the country. You are messing with my world view. Quit it. /sarcasm.
I’m a huge proponent of doing what the Black Panthers did, buy so many fucken guns Conservatives get nervous and pass gun control again 😂.
Damn, I fired one of those for the first time just a few weeks ago and it was glorious. Good on you for getting the final word over the gravy corps
I've never fired a Barrett, but i have fired guns and yes, firearms of all shapes and sizes pack a whole lot of fucking punch which is why...they need to be used RESPONSIBLY. people can be against gun legislation. it is what it is. what pisses me off more is that so many of these dipshits treat guns so recklessly, like it's a fucking trophy and status symbol. No man...it's a fucking weapon. I would take you a lot more seriously if you treated it with the responsibility and care that is necessary
Silly men and their accessories.
"That's not a gun" *Produces rifle* "That's, a gun"
Same I love firearms and reminding the alt rights that everyone not on their same mental state is pretty well armed as well
You spent $10,000 just to piss off a Boomer? That's is god-tier petty right there and you should post to r/pettyrevenge.
I also have an absolute shitload of binary explosives for target shooting and use it for that. It’s fun, I bought it to be petty but I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t my favorite gun.
If you want to annoy them you gotta use nonbinary explosives.
Hell most armor can't even stand up against 762x51. At 50 cal the best body armor would do is make them more identifiable
That is sofa king awesome
lol lesbian here that knows stuff about cars, concrete and house fixing things. They expect a lot of people in the family to know about cars. My sister and I wasn't interested in cars and went more arts/technology.
I’m glad my dad was a hippy. As long as I’m alive, healthy and happy, he doesn’t mind what I do.
See, my parents were both deadheads, so I kinda don't get all the stuff that goes on here simply because parents didn't do any of the things here. They are super mellow people who just live and love. I also feel bad af for all the people here who didn't have the loving and supportive parents I had growing. I know it's a privilege that I had the parents I had, and I definitely try not to take it for granted.
My parents weren't deadheads or hippies... they were really kinda square. But they were loving parents and very encouraging and supportive towards me, my brother, my wife, my children. I miss them a lot.
Yeah my dad passed in 2015 and there isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about him. The dude was the most badass, tough as nails, but a giant teddy bear I have ever met. I miss him daily but revel in the things he taught me. He always told me "no one is ever truly gone if you remember them." Much love to you fellow redditor. Big hugs to all those who have lost their parents from death or NC we are all in this shit together. Let's try to love each other.
I spent my entire ride to the dentist last week with my father talking all about his new pistol that doesn't have a safety like 1 I don't care and 2 that sounds like a terrible idea for someone with as little patience as he has.
Whether I’m into someone’s passions, interests or hobbies or I’m not if they’re proud of it and want to tell me i encourage it and ask questions I wanna see people do well with the things that’s keep their flame burning
"what do you mean you're not absolutely fascinated by expensive to maintain cars from 20 years before you were born? Put down that book of birds and the binoculars your plans just changed we're going to the garage!"
Here's the kicker though, if you know more than they do on a topic they think they know better in, it goes over their heads and they don't want to talk to you anymore or get irrationally angry because they can't compete.
Ever dealt with one who's been doing a hobby for years but everything they know about it is completely outdated, dangerous or flat out wrong? Came up a lot in tarantula keeping.
All the time! I see it in tech where one of them tries to "correct" me with their own bad practice they learned 30 years ago. But when they create a security issue because they found a flash drive on the floor and wanted to see what was on it, I'm the idiot.
Like my mom getting pissed at me for putting the hamster she bought my son in a decent sized cage instead of the crittertrail deathtrap she bought. Apparently now she thinks the entire thing was a waste of money and is irrationally annoyed if I even mention it.
Reminds me of the Facebook friend I had a few years back. She scolded me for buying my son’s betta a 10 gallon aquarium because “they prefer small dirty cups of water! That’s what they live in in nature!” Dude… no.
That's where they live in nature? Hahaa !! Can you imagine that show with David Attenborough?
You also see it constantly in musicianship. Not dangerous, obviously, but the amount of people who own dozens of guitars they can’t really play is hilarious.
Boomer "guitarists" who can only play smoke on the water but have countless rare or well made guitars are definitely artificially driving up prices. Like cool Kevin, you've had a 69 scrimbly scringus blue face Les Paul that was only issued in a batch of 50 sat gathering dust for 30 years that you don't let your son play because he'll only play that damn heavy metal racket even though he's way better than you ever were
Me being a trans woman and knowing more about the history and mechanics of firearms than my dad does be like. (I don't own any cuz my partner doesn't want any in the house and I can't afford to rent a range locker, about which I am big sad)
Don't forget they expect you to be an extension of them. If you have likes interest or goals that different from theirs for real life you aren't dumb and they will eventually die
My Boomer brothers yelled at me to shut up even if I wasn’t talking to them. I grew up thinking I wasn’t allowed to have interests. I hid evidence of anything I was into. Then they claimed I was a really boring person. Couldn’t win.
*gestures broadly at boomer garages full of worthless beanie babies*
Because they’re part of the “Me Generation”.
Also, most of them never thought about their children as actual people, only as property they felt obligated to produce EDIT: the personal reflections below have struck me profoundly. I’ll be forever grateful for the parents/family I had; I wish everyone was able to say that. And I wish all y’all the love and support you were cruelly denied.
Can confirm. Mom tried to use me as, in her own words, “A weapon to use against your father.” I was never a person to her. Dad…Well, he gets upset if anyone else does something he wants to do or is more successful than he is. Brother got a gaming computer for christmas one year. Back when they first started being a thing. Quad Cores, I think. He (Dad) had a better, newer one by January. He also offered to get me a job at his work once, then screamed at me that I wasn’t about to “ruin his career” so he made sure I never even GOT an interview…all because I grasped what he was showing me “too quickly.” We don’t really talk much anymore.
God damn I'm sorry your parents were so dysfunctional
That’s okay. I’m somehow nothing like either one of them. My Mother died a while back. I didn’t go. No regrets there. Dad’s still a narcissistic man child but…I have the best stepmom ever. Only reason I still talk to my Dad, really. She always was there for me, and while I call her by her first name, I call her Mom on Mother’s Day. Because she’s the only real Mom I had.
Write that last sentence in her Mother's Day card this year. Made me tear up a little.
Already planned to! We lost my stepbrother (medical issue and her first born) a year ago on the 25th (26th is my birthday and I’m turning the same age he was.) So I’m planning to do whatever she wants this year. It needs to be special. Whole day, up to her. Anything she wants to do, or has wanted to do…we’re gonna do. I can’t replace my brother, would never try to, but I can damn well make sure he’s remembered and make sure that she’s as taken care of as she’s taken care of me. She deserves that much, at least.
Sounds like you are very lucky to have her and she's lucky to have you too!
100% my mother has never been shy about this fact either. I wasn't a happy accident or an accident at all I am a well thought out, planned and executed tool for maintaining my mother's emotional needs and an extension of her. Like a personal assistant that's not allowed to have thoughts or needs. My only need is what do I need to make Mother happy again.
I am positive that my mother’s main motivation for having children was the free farm labor.
Pretty sure that's not a secret of farm folk 😂
Hey u/Andidroid18 your mother is on line 7. She says she just got the car washed and needs you to stand by it with an umbrella while she's working to ensure the birds don't poop on it.
You don't know how highly accurate this comment is LMAO
This is scarily similar to my wife's relationship with her mom. We apparently aren't allowed to be our own people, and we apparently live to serve her every emotional need. I'm roped in now since I married into that family. We've been working on boundaries with my in-laws and my parents, all of whom are boomers, but damn it is so hard when they're so self centered and self serving in every aspect of life
Exactly. If it’s not *directly* about them they stop paying attention/caring.
It’s funny that term to describe that generation has existed since the 70s and I can see why
Since the '50s. The Me generation gave themselves the name baby boomers because they didn't like the name that their parents gave them. Now they don't like that their children are using Boomer against them.
I said this in another comment, but I'm a firm believer they think life is a competition and no two people can be standing on the same step of life at the same time. You're either above them, or below them. If someone is happy or successful, it means they've gone down a notch.
My parents have finally gotten a little better at listening to subjects that aren't their interests, but it has taken them until the twilight of their lives to do so. This is a huge reason that my dad and I have no real relationship. If I don't pick a topic that he is personally interested in, he basically ignores me altogether. Always has. This is yet another way I try to use them as an inspiration to parent differently than they did. I will routinely listen to my kids talk at length about subjects I couldn't possibly care less about. I want them to know that they are important to me.
This is the way. Honestly, I *love* hearing little kids talk about something they're into. I don't need to know anything about it to enjoy their energy and passion. Did Boomers never feel this about their own kids??
I agree. It's great to hear them be passionate. I can admit that sometimes, I may not want to hear my sixteen year old rant about the latest YouTuber controversy or the drama in his discord server. Okay. My fourteen year old is a full on socialist that thinks that Marx is horribly misunderstood. They love to go on and on about Bolshevik this and the workers that. None of these things interest me at all. But my kids do, so I listen and ask questions.
They’ll remember that you cared, and listened.
That is my hope.
I remember my mom fondly. She would engage in my hobbies even if she didn’t understand them. Like anime conventions she’d go to. She lived the costumes people would make, and would take pictures and enjoy stuff. She was the only family member who didn’t dismiss my hobbies. Now my dad would always make comments like, “aren’t you to old for those cartoons”. I never tried introducing him to what I love after that. Now I’m just sad my mom was the one to pass while he’s still alive. I do love him, but I honestly don’t see myself being to dad when he passes eventually.
My mother thought I was perpetually five. Like thanks, mom but pokemon hasn't been a core interest for over a decade and it only lasted that long because you kept shoving the games at me when you were trying to buy my forgiveness. Can I get a book instead next time? Or socks? You can never go wrong with socks.
For real, tell me *all* about your favorite dinosaur!
I relate to this so much. I’m 45F. I have an empty space in my soul where my dad should be, because it’s easier getting a conversation out of a rock. He was trad dad, leaving mom to do the child rearing. I remember him teaching me math and cursive before I started kindergarten, and he read some books to me. I can remember those early memories because there are so few concentrated interactions with him afterwards. You can talk to him about his interests, but he has no comment for any of mine. Or if he does say something, it’s snarky. So many things in my life - no comment about those, either. Dad never taught me how to use tools like he did my brother, I guess because I’m *a girl*. My brother taught me a lot of things my dad should have. I love making things, and I bought myself a scroll saw. I made a small finger joint box. My dad was so surprised, and suddenly we were having conversations about it. He asked me all kinds of questions, because the scroll saw is one tool he didn’t have. And then he’s so shocked I wanted to learn how to use the lathe, and we were on it. I loved it and hated it at the same time, because here I was in my *40s* and he is finally spending time with me. And all I could do was bitter cry to my husband and tell him that it was like dad finally saw me for the first time. I love finding out what our kids are involved in. I helped our daughter make a mushroom hat for the upcoming Renaissance festival. Our son and I send each other music to listen to. Both are great artists. Even if I don’t enjoy something they’re into, it’s important to them, and that’s what matters. It’s not that hard to ask positive questions and give encouragement.
That's the thing. It's not hard to ask relevant questions and make a few comments. I can't imagine not wanting to be involved in my kids' lives. But he never has. My mom occasionally sees the grandkids, usually only if I bring them to her, but whatever. If my dad had his way, the next time I see him will be when I carry his coffin to a hole. And this isn't new, it's always how he has been.
> This is a huge reason that my dad and I have no real relationship. If I don't pick a topic that he is personally interested in, he basically ignores me altogether. Always has. Yeesh, this exactly describes my boomer dad too.
My dad was great at talking AT me, not WITH me.
I try to do this for my kids. Wasn't so good at faking an interest with my oldest (edit: I tried but he could tell I was doing it for his benefit like) and I feel bad because he is able to tell when he's info dumping and will apologize. But I had practice and now my youngest has no idea I do not give a fraction of a shit about minecraft. He genuinely believes I was fascinated and grateful for the education.
My late mother never missed an opportunity to ridicule my collection of action figures and collectibles from video games and movies I like. "I never thought I'd still be buying my 40-something son toys for his birthday!" Yet she was completely oblivious to the fact that my collection serves for me the exact same purpose her massive collection of glass hummingbirds served for her. 🤦🏻♂️
My mother was like this too. Watching TV was her hobby. Watched TV all day in her retirement. But couldn't fathom me spending a few hours playing a videogame. Treated it like something kids do.
My parents watch tv for over five hours a day but lose their shit when they visit me or vice versa and see me play video games before bed. Calling it ‘poison’
I told my mother that RPGs were just a combination of books and TV and suddenly she understood.
They're narcissistic by nature, but they also divide hobbies into "adult hobbies" and "children's pursuits." And pets that aren't dogs or cats are for children, not adults. So you're not just getting "your hobby is weird." You're also getting "your hobby shows that you're not a mature adult--which I, as a boomer, know because nobody but boomers are mature adults." Edit to add, plus if you're a guy, pets are for girls, so you're a Insert Homophobic Expletive.
No no, fluffy mammals are for girls. If he had a pet reptile his dad would have different complaints. Still complaints, but different ones
What about hyenas or bears? Did Siegfried and Roy make big cats "gay"?
They certainly tried, but the kitties weren't having it
Idk, having a pet bear doesn’t seem very straight to me
Meanwhile my boomer dad walked a pomeranian and pomeranian something or other and had no issue doing so.
Uh ya, sorry one issue with your comment, if a grown ass man cant enjoy his kid loving and talking about their pet. No way in HELL is that man gunna give 2 shits about a cat. To them Cats are all female because they are for women. As a 29yr dude who's best friend and cat passed this year, anyone who ignores the companionship and love capabilities of a feline friend is honestly missing out, but I Wai I could say I feel bad for them except they are probably sparing a cat from a miserable home 🙃
I'm with you on the gendering of cats. A load of boomers also regard pets as disposable.
Kristi Noem (probably): did somebody say disposable???
I'm sorry for your loss.😿
My MIL does this and it is infuriating. I like high end figurines and she will not even consider purchasing one of any kind because they are dolls. Her son? Here are 4 pairs of collectable sneakers for your wall. Will never concede that they are the same thing really. Icing? What is all over her place but Gd precious moments.
But also all children should be enthralled by their adult hobbies. My dad is really into model trains and I have had to explain to him many, many times that my sons are NOT. He has a huge collection and one day asked me to come collect it for the boys, he had run out of room. He was personally offended that my 9 and 12 year old didn't want his trains. Fckn clueless.
Absolutely. Though, I think that's largely age more than generation. There's also a generational tendency to not be interested in whatever The Olds are.
Growing up I’ve always loved Lego. Of course my parents were unkind about it. Now they don’t know their only set of grandchildren and our kids have a light up dollhouse made of Lego that is over five feet high and 18 layers. Our kids are grown and nearly 18 and care much more about the dollhouse I made them than the selfish set of grandparents who can’t even remember birthdays for the kids.
Reminds me of someone I knew, one of these 'sigma-grindset entrepreneurs' who say: "Hobbies are for women and children, I work for a living."
What a sad life
i was just listening to a podcast that mentioned that back in the 1950s, there was an obsession with men infantilizing women. I'm not just talking about chauvinism, i'm talking straight up borderline pedophilia. Versus a big trait of masculinity was to "grow up" as soon as possible. the host was saying that the research she did on this topic led her to believe this is one of the main reasons why pink became a "girlie color." Before, babies used to be dressed up in blue or pink regardless of gender (white was actually the most common, as was yellow). She theorized that this idea that women mentally and emotionally stayed child-like and girly whereas boys were supposed to "grow up," is what caused pink to be associated with girls when it was previously just associated with babies. it also, over time, also might have been why pink for boys is so much more stigmatized than blue for girls i bring this up because i think this weird emotional constipation of the 1950s is a big reason for so much dumb shit and warped ass views on "what it means to be a man."
I caught crap from my mom for rescuing and adopting a cat. And she went in on my sister for getting a lizard Works for me tho, she's allergic
When I was younger I was a big car guy. I still like them but I’m more fiscally responsible now. Anyway… didn’t matter who I was talking to or how long the conversation had been going on, if my mom heard me say anything about “cars” she would start chanting “CARS CARS CARS CARS CARS” loud enough that she became the center of attention.
Pull out your phone and start videoing her. Threaten to post it. You might have to follow through on that if she tries to call the bluff.
I've always wondered how pulling up a recording of a baby crying would do. Just make eye contact and play it. When they stop turn it off. If they start again play it again.
See! Success! It works! Works for toddlers too
Return the energy. Tell him your sick of hearing about his midlife crises Hot Wheels collection. Also lawyer? Explains alot.
I’ve never met a lawyer that wasn’t a miserable husk
Genuinely some of them are ok. I work for them but it can really go either way.
compelling data
There are so many different types of lawyers. The difference between the average private criminal defense atty and the average government agency attorney is like night and day.
Idk what it is about lawyers that makes them like that, but all the “stereotypes” are completely true
I work for lawyers. They can be straight wild sometimes.
My dad was a lawyer (just retired). Can confirm. I (37F) was a voracious reader during my college and uni days. Like, what are you gonna do on your 2-hour public transit commute with complete strangers besides sleep or read? So I did both. But I also wrote a lot of fanfic at home. I think it was a decompressing mechanism, strangely enough. Wrote a lot for school for sure, but writing fanfic was for *me*. Dad would pass by my room where I was writing or see me reading in the living room or outside and he'd huff and puff that it's stupid and I won't ever make money out of it. I'd tell him "hey dad, you saw The Firm and liked it, right? Did you know it was based on a book and it was written... by a lawyer?" He'd invariably reply that the author didn't work as hard as him obviously. But he'd tell me alllll about the tech he was using or learning about and how much better than his firm's IT specialists he was because he did XYZ (for the record, no, he's not your typical "what is this" boomer when it comes to tech... He actually championed the switch to PDF and he's a power Acrobat and Access user). I'm the only one in the family who understands his tech jargon because I'm a graphic designer. Aaaaanywho, so yeah to him reading/writing as a hobby is dumb.
“That’s interesting that he worked so much less than you but made so much more money than you.”
See the irony? He is blind to it.
How tf is reading and writing dumb to him when that is a major part of their job?
I asked that once. He replied that because it's part of his job, it's senseless to do it as a hobby. Like, I get it, it's not something he wants to do outside of work because he's all read/writing'd out. But then again hobbies are healthy, so let people enjoy what they enjoy even if they'll never see a dime from it. It literally kept me fucking sane in that madhouse (narcissist piece of work housewife mom, dad enabled her).
Omg! My hobby growing up was reading. Anything and everything I could get my hands on. My dad would catch me, take my book and send me outside to ‘play’. Eventually I had indoor books and outdoor books, then my mom finally told him to “leave him the fuck alone Roy, just because you can’t read for more than five minutes doesn’t mean that it’s stupid” and then slept on the couch every time he was a dick to me about reading. It took him some months but eventually he stopped being such a dick.
Their entire career is about adversarial conflict. Eventually, the mentality dominates every interaction.
They hated every single thing I was interested in. I could have become a very different person if I had even a little support in what I liked.
Don't forget trying to push you into whatever they thought was "best" regardless of your own interests or enjoyment
That definitely as well.
Do you ever wonder what your life would be like now if you had had a modicum of support?
Everything I've ever accomplished in life was in spite of my boomer parents best efforts to undermine everything along the way.
I find that any sort of "why do you like that thing I don't care about" boils down to "why aren't you me?" It's a failure to empathize.
Be it intentional or not...It always comes down to a lack of empathy, doesn't it?
My mom used to tell me I was too old for toys. Age 12 and she would say things like “you should be playing with girls instead”. Well jokes on her, cause I grew up gay and married a toy collector. I have them all over my home, and we use them as decorations blended with Wooden art I also collect. It looks awesome IMO and it’s like repellent for my family so win win I guess. Still wonder what would have happened if I had parents who supported the things I loved instead of making me feel bad for liking them.
They struggle with solipsism. They really can't comprehend that other people want different things.
The part they can't comprehend is that other people's judgments about such things are as valid as their own. They simply do not accept that premise.
You should get little remote control classic cars for your guinea piga to ride around in.
Then please make tik toks of it because that would be the funniest shit ever.
My mom used to do the same with my cats. Constant snide remarks and passive aggressive comments. Once, our door wasn't latched correctly and the wind blew it open, three of our newly rescued kittens got out and while we got two back quickly, it took over 24 hours for us to find the third. My mom would make comments like we had too many cats anyway and no big loss, etc. (Mind you, she didn't live with us and had nothing to do with any of our cats.) I finally snapped and yelled at her that we all got it, she hates my cats and would be happy if they were all dead, she made it perfectly clear. Of course, I hurt HER feelings and she never meant anything by it. She stopped mentioning them, though.
Nothing is bigger than their f'ing feelings...ever.
Boomers with unrecognized neurodivergent traits
And no coping mechanisms
Honestly I’d like to hear more about these guinea pigs. My adult kid has a skinny pig, she let me use as a model for pictures of a dollhouse I built. I fell in love with its little happy noises. At least I hope they were happy noises.
What is her piggies name? I think skinny pigs are very cool. I just get scared to own one since I’d have to closely manage their temp (it gets very cold in the winter and my mom refuses to turn the heater on). I have two boars named Sir Pancakes and Professor Waffles. Sir Pancakes is an Abyssinian (sassy breed) and he thinks he is the boss of the cage. He is older and Professor Waffles likes to annoy him. Professor Waffles is spoiled and thinks HE is the boss of the cage. He is a lot smaller than Sir Pancakes but still tries to steal his lettuce and bell pepper. He also doesn’t like human affection as much. He runs away and wants back in the cage as soon as he runs out of veggies to eat. Sir Pancakes is more affectionate and lets me pet him. And does your daughter have anymore piggies?
I’ve had Guinea pigs my entire life. Anyone who tries to make you feel bad for having them and enjoying them is not someone you want to have in your life. Also, anyone who says they only live for 2 years is an idiot. I’ve had people say “well MINE only lived for 2 years” Well okay, you probably took awful care of it and it passed away due to neglect.
I lost my Guinea pig at almost 7 a couple of years ago and still miss him intensely. His name was Cheese and he was a very lightly toasted Himalayan (only the tip of his nose was a little toasty, and a few dark hairs on his ears.) He lived alone because he was supposedly not super cool with roommates, but he had an open cage and large c&c “yard” in the house and our cats hung out (literally snuggling and grooming him) with him all the time. He was a bossy, chunky guy with a huge personality. Guinea pigs are awesome pets. I plan to adopt another one someday, hopefully a pair because I know it’s better for them if they tolerate each other.
Then have a guinea pig joke! What is a guinea pig's favorite breakfast? Cream of WHEET WHEET WHEET!
If you enjoy anything outside their very narrow view of normal (sports, kids, church, mowing the lawn, cars) they immediately worry about WHAT WILL THE NEIGHBORS THINK. Plus I think that because they don't allow themselves to enjoy anything fully anyone who does is an affront to them because it makes them question why they don't do anything.
“What will the neighbors think?!” is such a huge deal to my parents. I got pregnant due to birth control failure and I was unmarried. I was also 23. I heard “what will everyone in hometown think?!” I was just like why do I care? I don’t live there. Sure enough, quite a few of the boomers in town were gossiping that I was knocked up by a Mexican.
Narcissism. They cannot relate to anything other then their own limited experiences
My entire youth, my parents all acted like I was wasting my life playing video games all day. 1st of all... who fucking bought them? I never got an allowance. 2nd... I lived in a town of 300 people. There was fuck all to do. Oh wait... we got a Post Office in 91. Guess I was supposed to go there and hang out? 3rd... Every time you bastards took me out to do something, you either ridiculed me for not being able to do it right the first damn time... or something would piss you off so goddamned bad, you stayed pissed the whole day. I would've loved to have gone fishing.... or riding ATVs... or Hunting... or whatever. But you taught me it was way better to keep my head down and stay out of your way. Because everything pissed you off, and eventually led to ass beatings. So yeah... hanging out with Super Mario was preferable to anything you were offering.
Lol my parents were the same with videogames. They bought me my first console and games until I was 18, but they were shocked that I actually loved playing them. They still struggle to understand that I love videogames to this day.
So many lack theory of mind. If they were capable of it there wouldn’t be that pathological need to control others’ interests using negative comments. Let’s say you have a guinea pig and love your pet, is there any reason for someone to go on a tirade about how much they hate guinea pigs? Nope. The pet owner is going to be left with a lower opinion of the hater.
> Let’s say you have a guinea pig and love your pet, is there any reason for someone to go on a tirade about how much they hate guinea pigs? Nope. The pet owner is going to be left with a lower opinion of the hater. The fact that they cannot imagine we are judging them and taking steps to limit our exposure is WILD.
Because they are angry people. It doesmt matter what you do, what you are interested in, or whatever. You could be an exact clone of them, and they would still find something to get mad at because they need to feel like they are better than you.
Even my asshole boomer dad liked my guinea pig. He called him a "guinea hog" and thought it was amusing that it would go "wheek wheek wheek" whenever someone opened the fridge.
This is my hot take in this (professional counselor and therapist by trade): Most Boomers were probably raised by parents who didn't pay them any attention and also told, "Children are meant to be seen, not heard." In their minds, now that they are "the adults" in the room, everyone should shut up and listen. It's the typical, "I've done my time, and earned mine, so now everyone needs to suck it and listen to me." Whereas younger generations figured out that it's not great to be ignored by your parents/others and some have developed the empathy of, "Oh, we really should learn to take interest in others instead of only talking about ourselves all the time." There's also a lot more literature and education/training about how active listening is the key to building positive relationships. Again, painting with broad brush strokes and generalizing here. I have met plenty of folks from all generations who have learned to listen and they are definitely the ones I have the most respect for.
Next time he brings up his car, tell him you feel like it's a bad investment. Be sure to add, "Especially with everything going on in the world today."
My mom doesn't get angry, she just gets this bored look on her face and stops engaging. She'll stare off into space or just start doing something else like reading.
They can't fathom it. They really can't understand that anyone thinks, does, or likes something different than what THEY like. My Boomer mother would ask me about XYZ hobby/thing going on, then use whatever I told her as fuel for gossiping about me. Which she did CONSTANTLY.
Because they don't. Any time I have met a retiring boomer, they say, "What am I supposed to do now?" Bitch, get a fucking hobby! Paint! Do drugs! Have a personality past work.
Hell, I'm not even allowed to talk about my JOB around my mom (70f). She doesn't understand what I do and it makes her feel "left out".
One time, at a nice dinner at a high-end restaurant, my mom, my sister, and I were discussing a book we had all read. It was a nice, engaging conversation about the book/author. My dad interrupted us to tell us that he and my brother felt left out of the conversation. He did this in front of my husband and sister-in-law, and it was very embarrassing and killed the vibe for the whole dinner. There were seven of us at that table, and three of us were engaged in a conversation. Nothing was stopping other people from talking to each other.
Sounds like my mother, even though she isn’t a boomer. She gets mad when I want to show her something, but I’m practically forced to pay attention to whatever she wants to show me. I don’t show her anything anymore, so I don’t pay attention to her anymore.
I loved ball pythons. I saved all my money to get a set up for a breeding pair. My grandparents hated everything I loved. Came home from work one day, and my whole set up and snakes were gone. No explanation, just that they didn't like them. I fear they dumped them in the woods behind our house to starve. I searched forever, but never found them or my tanks. I was devastated..
My dad has threatened to do that with my guinea pigs. I don’t think I would be able to bear it. I am so sorry that happened to you
After something like that I'd cut contact with them completely. It's a good thing my family never did that, because I get feral when it comes to protecting my animals.
Frankly, I think it has more to do with the fact this generation is the most self-centered, hedonistic, entitled, greedy and jealous generation in history. Seeing you experiencing joy is offensive to them. All joy and pleasure, like money, should be for THEM. You have something they don't? They'll try to take it away. Wish I was exaggering even a bit.
Because they do not have any interests. They see you doing things you like instead of what you were told you should like, and your freedom and independence makes them angry. They are jealous of the individuality you display that they never had the guts to fight for. It reminds them of the things they were too scared to do. The dreams they set aside to conform.
Once I was reading a book on some science subject. Mom came into my bedroom, looked at my book th n threw it down and whined "Why can't you read *girl* books?!"
Because they’re in an unhealthy mode of life where everything they don’t know or have interest in is irrelevant, stupid, and annoying. It’s complete self-centeredness and incuriosity about others.
To a man I don’t know a single boomer with a hobby. Literally all they do is languish in their free time watching soap operas, drinking and doing housework. It is inconceivable to me that you would spend the opportunity of having no work coupled with a decent retirement income and just waste it on nothing. I’m sure there are exceptions but I’ve never met them.
My wife and I were visiting my parents and telling my dad about one cat who has diabetes and we have to give her insulin twice a day. He goes off on this tirade about how pets aren't people and you should just let them go and get a new one. My mother has come up behind him and was listening to him. Also, I had a childhood cat, named Cat, who lived to be 21 years old. Mom: Joe! How much money did you spend on Cat the last year of her life? Dad: (literally sputters) That's...that's different. Cat was FAMILY! Me: Dad, most people consider their pets to be family.
“Dad, if you expect me to take an interest in your hobbies like your cars, the least you can do is have the courtesy to listen when I’m talking about mine.” I talk to my boomer parents and in-laws like children when they’re acting like children. I also don’t tell my parents 90% of what’s going on in my life.
My late father( I loved him, may he rest in peace), was like that with mine and my siblings interests. He would go on and on about motorcycles, plains and trains, which we all found boring as shit. We had to listen though, otherwise he would pout like a toddler. Music now, he was dogmatic about music. He loved it, but he wasn’t open minded about any genre or musicians but the ones he liked. Mine and my siblings tastes in music were always garbage according to Dad. Especially when we were teenagers. I loved grunge, my brother loved death and black metal, and my sister likes R&B, and according to Dad, they were all no talent trash. This is why I never, ever shit on my children’s interests in anything, unless something they took an interest in something that promoted hate, or any kind of harm.
Oh, I want in on this one. According to my boomer mom, my husband never bonds with our teenage son because they never do anything outside together. Nevermind that they spend hours and hours together playing video games. Clearly it can't be bonding because it doesn't involve someone throwing a ball outside. Boomer logic.
My boomer dad still can't handle that whenever he praises me for being a "computer whiz" (i.e., I can do the most basic of things that he absolutely refuses to take 5 mins to learn), I point out a lot of it is thanks to my passion for the video games I played while growing up (that he absolutely hated and still thinks are a childish waste of time). He thinks all the things I learned about computers came from study, like as if I sat down and read a compTIA text book and figured everything out that way. The vast majority of things I know came from just messing around and needing to learn just enough to get the games to work on whatever I was trying to play them on. He can't fathom hobbies, and the pursuit of enjoying them, can directly and indirectly lead to the acquisition of related knowledge/skills that have very practical applications.
I get that too. I like playing videogames and sometimes the occasional hike. But because I don't sit around the house smoking and watching Fox News, I'm lazy and uneducated.
My first (and best) Guinea lived to be almost 10. She was awesome.
My dad hated my guinea pigs. I got them in high school and went away for a few months when I was 18-19 and he sold them without telling me. Only found out on the car ride home.
I’m so sorry. That is my number one fear. I can’t imagine losing my babies like that
Clearly they believe the BS people believe about pet rats. Also, lack of respect.
I feel do bad for rats. They really got the short end of the stick. Treated as experiments and considered stupid filthy creatures by a majority of the population
My dad was always like that. There's no such thing as a morally neutral aesthetic preference; everything is either GOOD or BAD, and God help you if you like something he doesn't. I actually didn't realize how awful he was about this when I was a kid, because we happened to share a lot of interests. I did know that he was very condescending about some people's hobbies, but I was obtuse, and hey, he was usually nice to me. When I had kids and he just... shat all over every thing they tried to talk about... rolled his eyes and mocked them... his little grandkids, trying to show him a song they liked... it really crushed me.
https://preview.redd.it/3znvedk329zc1.jpeg?width=700&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e4c72b5faebaba35b617853ae1dd27f87f0f9cc8 How could you say no to that face.
my step mom immediately gets up and leaves if we start talking about something she doesn’t like or know about in front of her. it’s absolutely wild.
Too many boomers really are just grown toddlers.
I am just not allowed to talk to people at all when she’s around. At least not about anything she doesn’t like & not for longer than she thinks is appropriate. I am 42 & she will apologize for me.
My dad kicked me out of his interests when I showed interest in something else. When I was a kid, he’d take me to classic cars meets all the time. I was fine with the cars, but enjoyed spending time with him. When I was a teenager, I got into music; both performing and listening. When my knowledge surpassed his, he just stopped inviting me to do anything involving cars. I’m in my mid thirties now and live in a city less than an hour away. I’ve played in a half dozen bands in the last 20 years or more, toured the US a couple times, played countless local shows, been flown out to festivals around the country…..never once been asked by my father about any of it. Never shown any interest in coming to a show, watching any of our videos online, hearing any of the music I make. But spent literally 45 minutes at Easter dinner gushing over some 29 year old guy he met at a car show that works in a welding shop and makes sculptures out of the scrap metal laying around. Like told me about every aspect of this guy’s life like he was Teddy Roosevelt or something.
oh wow, I just realized my husband (not a boomer, genx) does this to me!! I garden, work with feral cat rescue, and own a software company. He taps his foot (as if he's impatient and wants me to be done talking) and rolls his eyes whenever I talk about these things. His hobbies, however, are more important and interesting. Uh oh
You deserve better than that.
Because we're only supposed to be for them. We aren't supposed to have thoughts, feelings, and lives of our own, we're supposed to serve them from as soon as we're able until they're dead. They're entitled to our bodies because they contributed their DNA and paid for our survival in a life they decided we should have, not that we chose. Obviously this isn't every single one of them but far too many parents, especially boomer parents and before, see having children as a way to keep slaves, even if it isn't their conscious thought. They don't want children, they want dolls that will work for them.
We were had to flatter their egos. Not to continue the human race, not to improve america, hell not even to keep it going. We were made to be servants, and to fawn over them while they simultaneously disparaged their own parents (who for the most part were fairly cool.) Nothing about boomerism makes sense until you understand their mindset. And that mindset is it's all about me
“Those vintage cars die 2 years after you buy them. What’s the use?” Or just reply with “That’s nice, dear” as long as you think you can get away with it. Source: I’m a 1961 model (late boomer), frequently a fool, and unafraid of fighting metaphorical fires with metaphorical gasoline. Feel free to laugh and ignore.
It's like when you tell them you wanna work less hours, and they ask you "Why? What you do you wanna do instead?" and you know it's a trick question cuz they're just waiting to ridicule and invalidate whatever it is you do on your free time.
After I heard about the lead paint link to aggression, confusion, irritability, etc. everything boomer all made sense.
I love seeing all the boomers commenting on this sub and reaffirming all the top posts. It's so fucking hilarious.