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I_can_use_chopsticks

“I was stung once when I was a child” has the same energy as the classic Monty python line “A moose once bit my sister”


Blusset

Mynd you, møøse bites Kan be pretti nasti


Infinite-Bullfrog545

We apologise again for the fault in the subtitles. Those responsible for sacking the people who have just been sacked, have been sacked.


SparkleKittyMeowMeow

The credits have been completed in an entirely different style at great expense and at the last minute


invisible_23

152 Mexican whooping llamas


kobuu

r/unexpectedpython


ProbablyNano

you are incredibly bad at expecting things, lol


Racer013

I didn't expect a kind of Spanish Inquisition.


kobuu

Amongst our weapons are such diverse elements as... I'll come in again.


PatMyHolmes

No one expects the Spanish Inquisition


Zeelacious

[nobody does](https://giphy.com/gifs/inquisition-nobody-python-y5W98cY6OCudO)


nastywillow

Moose can't actually bite. However, they can give you a very nasty suck. Or not, depending on what you're into.


ExplodingTentacles

Meese


Re-Napoleon

Or the Futurama line "my great uncle saw a rat once"


ThePatrickSays

nø, relli!


fireinthemountains

a room with a moose


Natural-Tear-851

My dog stepped on a bee


BPpFb

Objection, hearsay


-Sa-Kage-

Well, I was stung 2x as a kid. Last time I stepped onto a bee on the lawn at evening when I was 7/8. Next morning my foot could not fit my fathers sandals any more... Just lucky that while I am highly allergic it's a LOCAL allergic reaction.


pikadegallito

Same! Local allergic reactions are much better than dying.


boozeshooze

Debateable


currentlyacathammock

"a rat done bit my sister (and Whitey's on the moon)" https://youtu.be/goh2x_G0ct4?si=h9VBpU9lsfJRH3lO


Fun-District-8209

Great reference!  Too bad most won't know it because, as I'm told, "The Revolution Won't Be Televised"


olafcio2000

My dog stepped on a bee


SkullFyre

But.... My dog stepped on a bee.... 😩


Igpajo49

My Dad lives out in a rural neighborhood and his closest neighbor is maybe a 1/4 mile away. He put up a water feature in his back yard and started noticing that there were always bees visiting it. He mentioned it to his neighbor more just wondering if they'd noticed more bees and the guy was like "oh those are my bees, I keep bees . They're just drinking, I hope you didn't mind." My Dad was like nah, whatever. Now that neighbor always makes sure my dad has a jar of fresh honey. He'll bring him over honey comb every once in awhile.


Dramatic_Explosion

Absolutely love that. My grandparents were farmers and contacted a local bee club to have some hives put on the farm near the garden. They knew from the jump how important they were, even set out big pans of water in the summer to keep them hydrated. As a kid I didn't get it, as an adult I really appreciate the whole thing top to bottom.


Lost_Wealth_6278

Fun fact about bee law: where I live, we can follow a swarming hive on private property (within reason).The hive is considered the beekeepers property, and found swarms are to be reported to local bee keepers to collect. If you don't know who's swarm it is, the property owner has some right to it (but they would have to keep bees to collect it, so seldom takes effect). Because it is not always the younger queen that swarms, a swarm may contain a pure bred honey queen of an expensive lineage, so besides the like 30.000 bees in the swarm, there is the value of their queen to consider.


JustA_Penguin

Do bee keepers accidents take other keeper’s swarms? Is there bee beef over stealing swarms of bees?


Lost_Wealth_6278

Hard yes. My dad got tricked out of a swarm a couple times, and once he helped an old guy to rescue an ownerless swarm from his property (usually you get to keep it then) only for the old geezer to reveal that he himself keeps bees and just wanted someone else to do the dirty work. As long as you keep sight of your swarm, it is yours, so keeping line of sight is important. Best solution is however to not even let them swarm in the first place - my dad can 'smell' that, they get giddy when they are healthy and need room in summer, and when the weather is right, so by monitoring temperature and moisture around their stand you can just separate them early and they will form two separate hives on their own.


Allcoins1Milly

I just woke up and I think I’ve already had enough internet for the day 🤣


levollisuus

My grandmas neighbours were beekeepers. One of their cats died of old age and the old lady was really sad. We had kittens so when they were old enough, little me picked a little cutie and offered it to her. She was in tears. From that point on I got jars of honey and honeycombs and beeswax candles every single time we visited my grandma and sometimes she'd just send some via my dad giving kitten updates. The kitty lived a very happy life up to about 25 years. Edit; phone hates me


Fizzy_Bits

Well I don't hate you. Thanks for that sweet story 🩵


davidjschloss

And like, what was your dad going to do if it weren't okay with him? Tell the bees to stop drinking water?


Slash_rage

I wish my neighbor kept bees! I have strawberries, melons, squashes, and tomatoes that all require or benefit from the pollination of bees in order to fruit.


Psychological-Lie321

You absolutely can sue, but you need to find lawyer bee willing to take the case, and they'd be suing the individual worker bees in a tiny little bee courtroom. But honestly most judge bees would only award small amount of pollen back and it would have to go directly to the flowers. But seeing all the bees in their tiny little suits almost makes it worth it.


Skitzophranikcow

Class action beesuit.


Vreas

Starring Jerry Seinfeld. Idk I didn’t watch the movie.


steelwolf651

It gets a lot of criticism and jokes about it, but idk, I liked it.


GuyOwasca

This comment has made my whole day, I can’t stop laughing


Dream--Brother

I can't beelieve they've done this


No_Statistician5932

Gotta hire some good lawbeeists


WhatsInAName0420

Bee movie: the sequel


Dirty_Mung_Trumpet

See the thing about bee law in this country, it’s not governed by reason.


Merc_Twain25

Not true. Bees are very orderly and big on rules. Hornets on the other hand, are a bunch of damned anarchists.


retrosaurus-movies

That's why if you get a box of hornets it's important to put an H on it, so you don't forget what you're dealing with.


CloudSill

Where are we with gulls?


smutketeer

Gullty as charged.


ohemmigee

You can keep a gull as a pet, but you don't want to live with a seabird, okay, 'cause the noise level alone on those things...have you ever heard a gull up close? It's going to blast your eardrums out, dude. (Quoting a show, I’m not actually versed in bird law. This is not legal advice)


Fantastic_Mind_1386

Where do you sit on the crow eggs in fight milk debate?


polkacat12321

This Karen should actually be thanking the bees for ensuring her flowers grow next year. It's literally a free service and she wants to sue 🙄


punninglinguist

No, you see, they're *stealing* the pollen.


WantonKerfuffle

And she wanted to use her pollen herself for uh... Umm... Anyway, it's **her** pollen!


KevinTheSeaPickle

She heard pollinators are essential and wants to know how to turn them into oil


WantonKerfuffle

She wants to extract their Element 710


punninglinguist

Maybe she wants to license the pollen. Passive income. #girlboss


crystal_castle00

Mine. My pollen.


cycl0ps94

I don't think she understands much of how anything works, let alone the pollination


Plane-Qualities

she is a Karen...


Anti_Karen_League

And I..... am....


shaunnotthesheep

...Iron Man \*snaps*


MsPreposition

This guy really would get a fair shake in the courtroom. The legal system is a hive mind.


firechaox

Yeah, I’d be like sure, I’m willing to pay for the pollen. But then I need to charge for pollination from the bees.


Eastern-Dig-4555

They can’t be fucking serious. Who would even bother taking this to court? What the hell???


_Junk_Rat_

Well the words “Pepper Place Market” tells me it’s from around where I grew up in central Alabama, where I’ll be the first to admit has some… characters… My bet is on somewhere in the Trussville/Mountain Brook area


kellogla

I cringed when I read the market name.


Eastern-Dig-4555

I doubt you’re the first, but I take your point


smellexisb

Dude don't tell folks


_Junk_Rat_

Not like I’m pinpointing an exact address, just giving a general frame of reference. Besides, not like it’s hard to google “Pepper Place Market” if someone wanted to know where this was


TheObstruction

Have you met people? This is easily within a chronically grumpy person's realm of logic.


Journo_Jimbo

Bro this post is so fucking old and I’m pretty sure it’s satire


indyfrance

The faker the rage bait, the more effective it is.


Independent_Donut_26

I've since moved but the nextdoor of my previous boogie masterplanned hellscape community was *unhinged*


indyfrance

I’ve never seen such lunacy as in my HOA’s forum.


Nuka-Crapola

It’s *probably* satire, but I have a neighbor who blames *every dog bark in the fucking neighborhood* on my dog specifically so like… this is not implausible for a Nextdoor post.


fireinthemountains

I want to hear more gossip about your trashy neighbor lol.


flatfishkicker

Nextdoor is a hotbed of petty insanity.


Fizzy_Bits

Well then just found a new sub to join..


MasterAnnatar

A reddit post that was screenshot and posted to Twitter only for that to be screenshot and posted back to reddit.


willstr1

Bee Law is weird shit, like they are legally fish according to the state of California


AdAdmirable5901

......what?


StreicherG

It’s true and stupid, but it’s for their own good: https://law.stanford.edu/2022/10/28/a-california-court-decision-bees-are-fish-shines-new-light-on-the-biodiversity-crisis/#:~:text=Blogs%2FLegal%20Aggregate-,A%20California%20Court%20Decision—Bees%20Are%20Fish—Shines%20New,Light%20On%20The%20Biodiversity%20Crisis&text=In%20September%2C%20the%20California%20Supreme,under%20California's%20endangered%20species%20law.


AdAdmirable5901

"Bees are legally consideered fish for their own good" It gets hilarious both out of context and as a brand new sentence LOL


mtragedy

Which makes capybaras bees, under papal law.


One-Broccoli-9998

I’m more familiar with bird law


Longjumping-Grape-40

Chicka-dee-dee little birdy, let's dance


SenAtsu011

'Murica: \*something happens\* Can I sue?


Masa67

Bee Movie 2


ShlomoCh

Honestly as they tried to argue it it really doesn't make much sense, but like, I'd understand their case if they had a phobia for bees and didn't like having so many so close


veturoldurnar

Then they can stop growing flowers? Because no one can guarantee that wild bees won't appear there too


ShlomoCh

There's a big freaking difference between the ocassional wild bee and having a full-on *beehive* next door


yellow-cheese

Yeah, knowing where the hive is. Wild bees building a nest in a tree 20 ft. from your property really isn't all that different from your neighbor having a beehive 20ft. from your property in their yard. Only real difference is the quality of life for the bees


ShlomoCh

I mean, I'd think that having a beekeeper neighbor would result in considerably more bees than just the ocassional wild bee. And if there was a wild beehive in a tree close enough to me for many bees to get to my property I wouldn't be happy either.


Independent_Donut_26

Again if you don't want bees don't have flowers. Because wild bees are everywhere 🤣


ShlomoCh

I guess that's true lol. I'm just saying that the chances of you getting bees in your lawn are going to increase considerably if you have a beekeeper as a neighbor. Or at least the frequency in which they come But like yeah if it wasn't painfully obvious, I don't live in a suburb or own a lawn to put flowers and count bees in


victorian_vigilante

This was the subject of a church investigation in the 16th century


PlasticTrex1980

(Heavy Satire)Is lightning this Karen on fire compensating enough? It saves on her heating bill.


Revolutionary-Car-92

Obviously this guy has never read a book. He has no idea how pollination works. He should be THANKING his neighbor for having bees handy. Sadly, depending on what retarded part of the Planet Florida they live in, they could have a case. "stealing the pollen or nectar from my flowers" Jesus !


AdAdmirable5901

Literal definition of "such a pleasant person to be around, sure you must be fun at parties"


fermatajack

Gob's not on board.


CloudSill

*Beads?*


luars613

This m8 has 0 clue how many flowers are needed for a spoon of honey....


Horneyj

I can have honey , annoy my neighbour and their children will get stung . Sign me up .


Naturegworl

What do they mean ”steal my pollen”? What are they going to use it for?


mtragedy

*For pollinating.*


Tortuga_cycling

How boring does your life need to be before you start thinking about shit like this? Not compensated? Really?


Fred_Wilkins

Oh God, I know where that place is. I think I might go buy some honey just to spite them. Bees stealing my pollen, almost as bad as that racist rock.


jimmysledge

You’re gonna have to follow the bee from the hive and then record every location it flies to until it arrives on your property… take that footage to the police. I guarantee they will LAUGH YOUR STUPID ASS out of the police station…and have a nice day.


Electrical_Gur4664

I saw a documentary where a bee sues the bee industry and wins, ray liotta even attended the courtroom for interrogation


NoahCharls6104

So the beekeeper has their neighbors and their bees attempting to sue them?! This would make for an interesting movie.


ResponsibilityHot720

Their user name of @bestofnextdoor seems a bit too ironic for it not to be satire.


thatirishdave

They collect examples of the worst people on Next Door.


Raelah

If a beekeeper moves next door to me I'm using this argument to get free honey.


Guy-1nc0gn1t0

Monsanto_irl


Blahaj_shonk_lover

To be fair, I’ve seen some whack Karen shit on Nextdoor back when I lived in Homewood. I could see an entitled boomer posting this since Pepper Place is in B’ham


DrPenguinstein

I specialize more in bird law.


suicidalquokka

I am pretty sure there was a video by Legal Eagle talking about this bee situation.


Lui_Le_Diamond

It's the video where I learned that bees are legally considered fish


Giogiowesz

STEALING THE POLLEN


SeAnSoN_710

Who's going to tell them?


drhagbard_celine

OOP is nuts but the neighbor could have given away some honey to the nearest neighbors to compensate for the increase in bees flying around.


danzanzibar

lol tf is wrong with people?


Fenzito

Bee law is/was a real area of law. I am sure there is a lot "bee law" nowadays as well, but in ancient Rome, bee law was a very hot topic. Bees did not fit neatly into farm animal or wild animal category so specific laws had to be made to make people whole when they get stung by an army of bees or if your neighbor entices your bees onto their property to make honey for them.


Hugo_Selenski

You can do whatever you want, Xer, but will the court give a crap? That's for a judge, someone more discerning than your parents, coming about to judge the merits of your complaint. You sure about this, sweety?


jedensuscg

Fuck, my wife would LOVE to have a bee keeper nearby. Some people actually PAY to have people bring their hives their property. Instead we just have neighbors spraying gods knows what and wiping out all the pollinators so much that my wife is outside getting frisky with all the flowers and a q-tip.


bmk37

Those bees are raping the flowers!!!!


holl0918

They are polinating the plants which produce the oxygen this person is wasting. Get over it.


MelonElbows

I saw a documentary once about this exact situation. I think Jerry Seinfeld was the narrator


drainbone

And you *know* they fucked after


Azebiki

This fills me with rage. I wish the old Gods would awaken and smite “Best of Nextdoor” down!


VanHalensing

I’m pretty sure it’s a parody account to show stupid people on Nextdoor….


Azebiki

I’m so naive.


Dangerous-Can1509

Let’s say you and I go to toe to toe in Bee Law and see who comes out the victor.


Link3265

r/Birmingham lmao


Beastleviath

I mean, it’s pretty stupid, but if I were the beekeeper, I would probably give neighbors the occasional free jar just because most people don’t really like having a lot of bees around their yard. potentially a substantial increase in the probability of me getting stung, for your little hobby/side hustle? Good thing nobody is allergic.


Skitzophranikcow

So, in this logic if I have a garden I would owe you free food because, the pollen may have come from your yard, and because I'm increasing biodiversity and increasing the sability of the biosphere I owe you something... Wait so i owe you, because I bought bees, grew them, kept the queen safe kept the hornets away and promoted flower growth.. I owe you because your worried a creature that only stings as a last resort and then dies.. So I'm confused, why do I owe you anything? Just because you don't lie bees, but the lack of bees are why the eco system is failing... im over here doing what the EPA says and your mad and want money...


Beastleviath

I didn’t say anybody owed anyone anything. only that if it were me, i would consider a jar or two a year for the neighbors to be a nice gesture. I am well aware of bees’ value to the ecosystem at large, but I hate when I’m sitting outside with a glass of lemonade and they keep buzzing around, trying to get a taste. I have been stung a couple times, and if the number of bees in my vicinity went up by 20 or 100 fold due to human intervention it would make me a bit nervous to enjoy being out in my own yard… I kept chickens for a while, who are loud and smelly creatures. I knew that these two aspects of otherwise good and beneficial animals were an inconvenience to my neighbors. Partly because of that, but mostly because of just wanting to help keep the people close to me happy, I was more than willing to part with some eggs for them whenever I had extra. not everyone is out to get you, most people just want to get along… And I would say it’s extremely common for people who have large vegetable gardens to share with their neighbors!


Independent_Donut_26

Beekeepers generally don't take honey from a hive the first year because the hive doubles in the spring, and they need it to get through the winter.


CleanOpossum47

Yee haw!


Street_Road_9967

Is this in mirca?


Skitzophranikcow

Dudes don't know how bees, or the environment works and wants paid... might be Florida.


OkProcedure4664

This is definitely one for Judge Steve Harvey


Skitzophranikcow

Judge wapner...


OkProcedure4664

Wasp-ner???


Hrafnagar

I don't know about tree law or bee law but I do have some experience with bird law.


PzKpfwIIIAusfL

Ah yes, Bienenrecht... everyone who had one semester of law school in Germany knows more about it than they ever wanted to.


mickbrew

Sorry, Bird Law is my area.


HarleyTrekking

Are idiots like this actually using good oxygen that the rest of need?


AsbestosDude

How about you and I go toe to toe in bee law and see who comes out the victor


somehugefrigginguy

Here's a video of an actual lawyer reacting to this post and breaking down the legal theory for all you nerds out there. https://youtu.be/3kfGIz3u0RA?si=pSGrAH8J0mhJMqsL


DausenWillis

When I was a child, a neighbor kept bees. He was kind of a big deal in the bee world. He wrote books about bees and had retired from studying bee diseases. A neighbor started kicking up a fuss after living there for 10 years and not realizing he kept bees. She got a visit from a lawyer from the Departmrnt of Agriculture to discuss her behavior and if she had trespassed in his yard. Here I am now, in a different state, and the backyard beekeepers also have someone to call if a neighbor is an asshole about the bees. Bees are important, and people are assholes. I'm very pro bee even though I'm level epipen-carrying allergic to bees.


amscraylane

Our neighbor put up a jig confinement. I could no longer enjoy the outdoors at our house. Didnt get any Canadian Bacon, Ham, or bacon.


ReallyGreenGuy98

I wonder what surprise bill this guy had lol


turbo_ice_man_13

I suspect if they brought this up to their neighbor instead of immediately considering how they could make money off a lawsuit, the neighbor would be happy to lend some honey during harvest time. Most famers at least put effort into having good relationships with their neighbors.


FarkMonkey

My son and I kept bees in our suburban backyard for a few years, and no one complained. But, we always made sure to give our neighbors a jar of honey at harvest time. It's just neighborly.


DoYouEverJustInvert

BEADS?!


cut_rate_revolution

Landlord mentality here. How dare they use the nectar from the flowers on my property. Nevermind how I wasn't doing anything with it.


FayeQueen

In some states, if you don't follow the regulations for keeping bees, your neighbors can sue, and the bees will be removed, not to mention fines. Those usually are how many feet away from any property lines, so much feet away from habitable buildings, and how much sqft of your land per box is allowed. If they're just flying and shit, they can't.


Szczypior53

Imagine not watching the "bee movie" documentary


Sunset_Tiger

Ngl I bet the OOP’s neighbor would happily offer a jar if they asked politely and were not being a dick.


keeleon

This is almost the plot of The Bee Movie.


LegalizeRanch88

The thing that turns me off to the idea of home ownership most is not the ungodly price of even modest homes, but the fact that most homeowners (potential future neighbors) seem to be absolute psychopaths who fetishize their land ownership to the point of insanity.


Sensitive-Incident78

Be ware of Jason ….


otasi

BEADS!?!


RaffScallionn

Real mystery what country this litigious litany is from.


YoungAxe503

Lol


SobiTheRobot

Like...why not just ask the neighbor for some honey?


Responsible-Stick-50

I can see the matching outfits this dude wears w his wife on vacation and I can hear his wife's haircut.


JFK2MD

The beekeeper should sue the homeowner for unpaid pollination services.


antgalva

I’ve herd of bird law. But bee law. Damn


sammagee33

There is no way this is real (not made in jest)


knighth1

So oddly enough he actually might have a case. If he could prove that the bees are using his flowers then there might be a possibility that he could get a percentage of the revenue. Not a large percentage but possibly 10-15 %


Independent_Donut_26

Thats not how it works.


knighth1

You would be surprised with how stupid sometimes actually works.


Independent_Donut_26

In this case: it won't


Esmeralda-Art

I was against them but then they said the thing about a jar of honey as compensation and now I have a new scam for if my neighbors keep bees


Substantial_Show_308

Call J.G Wentworth!


Demmos_Stammer

Their neighbour should charge them a pollination fee.


cma-ct

Bees are not obligated to acknowledge property boundaries. You have no case, unless there is a town ordinance against bee keeping in your area. Perhaps you never got a jar of honey because you are a shitty neighbor?


maskdfantom

She could probably just ask for a jar of honey


lofi_mooshroom

This is Monsanto personified


LochNessMansterLives

I’d tell them to touch grass, but they’ve already been outside today, watching the bees steal their pollen 😂😂😂


Outerestine

Yes but only if the beekeeper gets to charge you for your stealing his bees labor to pollinate your flowers. With back pay for the long period of uncompensated service.


[deleted]

If this is where I think it is, they're in central Alabama. That "average" that half of people are stupider than is pretty low thereabouts. (Source: I used to live there.)


LillyxFox

I see this post more than I see my parents


thesuprememacaroni

That wind is blowing across my property. How dare you capture that wind energy from me. That rain water runoff on my property is filling the streams and rivers. How dare you use my runoff to power a dam or water your agriculture.


saladass100

Ask neighbour for a wholesome free jar a week , or month


Skitzophranikcow

Your sense of entitlement is showing.


Cavemam2009

Depending on the amount produced, 1 jar would be 1000000000000% worth it to keep the peace. Now, I would only offer this if they came to me first, and mentioned they had a problem, and if they go straight to lawsuit, they aren't getting squat. Bc there isn't a judge anywhere that would take it seriously.


Independent_Donut_26

Honey is not harvested every week or every month


saladass100

Idk man , ffs , was just trying to make a goofy comment on a goofy post...


Independent_Donut_26

Cry


BrokenEye3

Bees. My god.