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GolgariInternetTroll

I support the Tuscaloosa campus folding their football program and moving institutional support to the Birmingham campus, to help maintain the traditional hierarchy of the sport.


SavingsFew3440

The school that wins the most grants wins the footballs 


dawgblogit

ABGR Always Be Grant Recipients  Football is for grant Recipients 


poop-dolla

In Alabama, ABGR also stands for Always Be Grant Riting.


knownbuyer1

Is that the extension for the Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good over there?


muck16

Same


RollTide16-18

Counterpoint: Tuscaloosa should open their own med school to spite UAB.  Yes I know that’s not how it works. But they drastically expanded the engineering campus to try and catch up with UAH and Auburn. Plus I want a school-sponsored hospital so any future children that may go to Bama don’t have to deal with DCH. 


red_the_room

I didn't read this, but I agree.


JerichoMassey

I'll agree if his final argument was Fire Gregg Berhalter.


lankyyanky

IDK who that is but fire anyone who spells it Gregg


CommunityFew6548

US soccer manager…he’s like the Butch Jones of soccer, more concerned about moral victories than wins


JerichoMassey

I liken him to Mike Shula since he is an alum that served us well as a player, but really should have never been in the position in the first place. Gregg’s biggest job prior to the US was being fired from some Swedish club.


Always_Chubb-y

We might not ever beat a top 15 national team (we're legit 0-5-5) but I'll be damned if I don't feel like a champion of life after


samasters88

Seconded.


MrClaw

ugh fuck i have to agree with a horn....thirded


samasters88

You agreed with us when moving to the SEC. Bring it in, buddy


El_Dud3r1n0

Now kith.


knownbuyer1

Was considering writing that too. Berhalter is the dollar tree version of Southgate


JerichoMassey

Southgregg


esports_consultant

Actually Southgate is the Poundland version of Berhalter.


idgafboutmyusername

I agree with my rival. What has this world come to??


magicinterneymomey

This might be UT unity


SaltyLonghorn

I just assume football communism and I agree.


PineappleTraveler

Tennessee fans can read?


Helpplease49257

Bama Fans can read???


TheMathelm

Squiggle-Squiggle, Squiggle, Squiggle, Squiggle-Squiggle-Squiggle. Hmm me no like Squiggle Squiggle.


Kodyaufan2

Well yeah they have to be able to read the profiles on ancestry.com or else how would they know if they want to swipe right?


PeggyOfficial

Auburn fans not knowing what state they’re in. Auburn education in a nutshell


hwf0712

You guys invented it? YOU claim that? Okay bud. There's a reason it was played on OUR field first.


DuvalHeart

The only way to decide this is by having a rematch. But let's have it at the Camden campus. And if Princeton is too afraid to go to Camden, well they forfeit all titles claimed.


Captain_Sacktap

We do not acknowledge Princeton as inventor of football! Long live the true king, Rutgers! Red team good, orange team bad!


ram944

Red team good! Orange team bad! I'm with this guy. 


JerichoMassey

Orange teams bad! I don't even cheer for Holland at the Euros!


idk2103

Man it’s crazy that the orange teams always happen to be the bad guys


berrey7

Auburn ✔, Tennessee ✔, Texas ✔, Clemson ✔


thejus10

add UF and Miami (the one in florida)!


green_and_yellow

Right?!? Especially orange teams that are “OSU”


hailstate1735

question: would max verstappen be considered part of a red team (red bull) or an orange team (dutch)


cb_cooper

I’ll bet he’s Dutch before a Red Bull driver.


eagledog

More reason to not follow him


cb_cooper

Hey, man; I was a fan of Max all those years Hamilton was winning, and now Lando and Oscar are doing well, which is nice. But you know, potato podildo


anti-torque

Everybody follows him, currently... except for Norris, who just gets in his way, so he runs him over.


ua2

Especially that pumpkin orange.


Present-Piano-2432

I despise orange teams lol


green_and_yellow

As do I! 🫡


confirmd_am_engineer

Illinois seems alright.


LordXang

So you would agree with the statement "Red team good. Orange team bad."?


CandidWillow3707

No, Orange team good!


BluesPuckHard

Orange team great!


El_Dud3r1n0

ORANGE TEAM BEST TEAM


ALStark69

If I could read I would agree!


grey_pilgrim_

Why you say fuck me for?


Newton1913

I will also stand by my Rutgers brethren ✊


JackOfScales

Flair confirms this man indeed hates orange teams.


mr_longfellow_deeds

Red teams very good


OkMetal4233

I’m with you! (Roll Tide!)


MothBeast

I begrudgingly but heartily agree with this Georgia fan. RED TEAM GOOD. ORANGE TEAM BAD.


Beer-survivalist

Red team good! Orange team bad! Your views are intriguing to me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter. Also, surely I could convince you to also find blue teams objectionable?


Captain_Sacktap

My official color tier list: Red Black Silver/Grey White Purple Green Gold Blue Brown Yellow Orange 🤢🤮


Beer-survivalist

This is a very high quality and well considered list.


markusalkemus66

Red team good! Orange team, also good...? Beavers are okay by us


cvsprinter1

Red team good! Orange team good! Purple team bad!


markusalkemus66

PURPLE TEAM BAD


green_and_yellow

PURPLE TEAM VERY BAD


TheAykroyd

PURPLE TEAM VERY VERY BAD


anti-torque

Don't forget grellow.


Enrickel

Red team good! Orange team good! Blue team bad!


cvsprinter1

Easy there, buddy


Original_Bet_9302

Go beavs


sausageslinger11

All orange teams are bad.


markusalkemus66

Go cry about it on all your natty trophies. We're standing up for our Beaver brothers.


Sir_Scarlet_Spork

Sorry, it's "Upstream, Red Team"


RegressToTheMean

Red Team, Upstream!


Sir_Scarlet_Spork

RAH


PoBoyPoBoyPoBoy

As a Bama fan, “red team good, orange team bad” is a motto I can get behind..


HarvardOnTheRaritan

I like you.


CandidWillow3707

Orange team good! Go Tigers!


remember_berries

ERRONEOUS, ERRONEOUS ON BOTH COUNTS


knownbuyer1

LA LA LA LA LA I CAN'T HEAR YOU


CandidWillow3707

This is my homie I support this guy, and his endeavors, at least until Tennessee inevitably has enough championships to challenge the Mighty Tigers of Princeton


muck16

We support Tennessee. Agreed!


CandidWillow3707

🤝🏻


dustyg013

I don't think you'll have to worry about that last bit. Maybe your great-great-great...grandkids will.


ToosUnderHigh

You shouldn’t be worried about Chazz Reinhold, who’s in THE HALL OF FAME… what you should be worried about is…. is you’re getting sloppy.


TigerTerrier

You shut your mouth when you talk to me!


chad_sancho

Yore*


0le_Hickory

I didn't read this, let's be honest, I graduated from Tennessee. I can barely read. But this is the greatest post in all of Reddit!


Helpplease49257

I’m gonna frame this shit


DiaDeLosMuebles

You had me at “doesn’t deserve to win”


knownbuyer1

Tiger 🤝 Tiger


guinness_blaine

Burning bright


RealignmentJunkie

In the stadiums of the night


ClaudeLemieux

*clap clap clap clap* deeeep in the heeeeart of Texas


knownbuyer1

Rah rah rah. Tiger, tiger, tiger.


richfahs

Sis boom ah!


Kodyaufan2

We should take back the ones they already have too tbh


anti-torque

Except for 92. That D was just fun to watch.


robotunes

[I cannot disagree](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=FkeJkPDScoI)


apexpredator68

That’s a Geaux Tigahs 🤝🍻


AllLinesAreStraight

Just want to remind everyone that the "first college football game" was basically just a bunch of students from two different schools meeting up on a field to play a game of pickup soccer with 25 people on each side.


SwissForeignPolicy

"Soccer" is being generous. The modern sport it most closely resembled is probably mud rasslin.


Real_Body8649

“It's like being the rich, snobby patriarch of college football who died decades ago but whose legacy still lives on to piss off everyone when mentioned.” Hmmm I wonder what that’s like.


knownbuyer1

We cry ourselves to sleep with our $34.1 billion in endowment. Notre Dame recently broke the $20 billion club so you must know what it's like too


Sir_Scarlet_Spork

I never thought I'd want Alabama to win until now.


robotunes

Red team good! Orange team bad!


HailState17

This should be an interesting comment section between additional shitposts and “Go fuck yourself.” Frankly, I’m drunk at the beach and am here for it.


RollTahoeRoll

I DISAGREE, QUITE VEHEMENTLY. WHAT IS A PRINCETON ANYWAY?


knownbuyer1

It's a school that rejected Alexander Hamilton and pissed him off so much that he came back to the school during the Revolutionary War and shot cannons at it


RollTahoeRoll

I LIKE THIS HAMILTON GUY, I ALSO SHOOT CANNONS AT YOUR TITLES.


Setting_Worth

Someone should write a play about that guy


JerichoMassey

As the great Alexander Hamilton once said, "yeah, well what are you gonna do, shoot me?"


gatorgongitcha

when keeping it real goes wrong


Vitamin_BK

I'm sure it would be very action packed and not corny at all!


drogonninja

That would kill


hwf0712

Should have used more cannons. Oh wait, you people would've just stolen them.


knownbuyer1

You should've tried stealing them back... oh wait...


RegressToTheMean

You put it in concrete! [So, this is the best we can do for now](https://thetab.com/us/rutgers/2016/05/05/rutgers-students-painted-princeton-cannon-red-6383) I will say when I was an undergrad a couple of decades ago, many a night was spent in my fraternity house with the engineering guys drinking some beers and trying to figure out how we could blow the cannon and get it back to Rutgers without getting caught. Obviously, that didn't work out well


ProctorDoctor500

Now I want those Crimson Tide to win another one, you dirty cannon thieves.


robotunes

RED TEAM GOOD!


Geaux2020

No.


ClaudeLemieux

Red team…ummm…blue team…uhhh…*hurts self in confusion*


knownbuyer1

Get gud m8


FCKABRNLSUTN2

This is tiger propaganda


Jolly_Job_9852

Big Cat is always Watching


sausageslinger11

Tigers bad. FACT.


Miek104

Tigers eat beats.


HeHasRisen69

The 90s were 30 years ago. Modern youths see Nebraska's titles like I see Minnesota's. They don't know. It's too old. Let go. It's over. We need to start creating tomorrow's has-been today. Alabama can be that has-been. They just need to believe.


Wernher_VonKerman

They just need to lose to Tennessee 36-62 in a game where they were 3-score favorites.


0le_Hickory

yes, please


RollTahoeRoll

You fucking take that back right now before it manifests


EWall100

Hold on, let him cook.


Dramatic_Basket_8555

Dude is straight up cooking with gas now


Wheels_Foonman

Needs to be 52-0 so we can take away their record for largest victory margin.


NebrasketballN

>Modern youths see Nebraska's titles like I see Minnesota's. >36-62 in a game where they were 3-score favorites. I'm gonna ask the two of you to knock it off, please!


Chunkfu

Can't go one damn thread without an Iowa or Colorado fan bringing us up smh


HeHasRisen69

Nebraska would be unstoppable if they caught passes like they catch strays.


NittanyOrange

Relevance is a decade. Nothing from before 2014 matters to anyone in college today.


renden123

I agree with this man! But we should start at 2015. For reasons.


hwf0712

No, no. 2014 was a good year. Let's never forget it.


Kodyaufan2

I believe


thats_amoore

They can start by losing to ULM again maybe


LittleTension8765

They don’t need to win anymore, they just need a delusional AD to look back 100 years and start claiming more titles


SirMellencamp

We have one delusional title sir and he’s been around so long he’s like part of the family


SparkMaster360

I've always said the Alabama Crimson Tide were the real 1891 world champions


robotunes

Open the trophy case, boys!!! We just got ourselves another title!!! *(pls ignore the fact that we started playing football in 1892)*


TumbleweedFlaky4751

Technically that means you were unbeaten in 1891 then


robotunes

sko buffs!!!


samasters88

aggy has that market cornered


TigerTerrier

Since teams did that, I would like to submit clemson retroactively claim a 4th national title. In 1948 clemson finished ranked #11 but we went 11-0. We were the only unbeaten and untied team that year.


knownbuyer1

I see a tiger, I upvote


justa_flesh_wound

The Michigan way!


LittleTension8765

I don’t remember them doing anything as blatant as what Bama did in the 80’s


FirstOne617

I mean...I can think of at least one fraudulent TSUN championship too


pnw_cfb_girl

I always been a big Princeton stan. Always=since two minutes ago when I saw this thread.


blatantninja

This is a very well thoughtout argument and we have no choice but to support it


BlueRFR3100

Alabama does not deserve another championship because I don't like them.


El-Jefe-Rojo

Logical, concise, merit based Can’t argue


seaxvereign

There have been 154 national champions of college football. Alabama claims 155 national titles. That alone is evidence enough that they don't deserve another title.


knownbuyer1

Do they not teach them how to count in Bama?


_Suzushi

You guys already got Chad Michael Murray and Hillary Duff, let us have football championships


dick_for_hire

Even if this is satire, it's just snooty enough to make me believe it's serious.


gsfgf

From a Tech perspective, I'm all for Bama winning nattys so that UGA doesn't.


Donelifer

I'm not convinced, Roll Tide!


Rickbox

Princeton spitting facts


Constant_Threat

Ole Miss sucks too


Most-Breakfast1453

Damn I am so here for the Princeton-Bama rivalry. Elephants and tigers must not get along cause it seems like all of Bama’s enemies are Tigers. Auburn, LSU, Clemson, and fucking Princeton. Tennessee State better watch their backs.


WillCent

Why don’t they deserve it you ask? I mean - outside of my one friends cute older sister - have you looked at em?


loop3y

The irony is a bunch of “cousin fuckers” and a Nazi Scientist figured out how to get to the moon before anyone else. So not only does Alabama own football, but as a state we own space


tameris

We were also the heart of the Civil Rights movement too. We aren’t as bad as everyone thinks we are. We are not perfect either…


Squiggleswasmybestie

Excuse me, Rutgers won the first national championship. They beat Princeton.


Kodyaufan2

I only read the title, but I agree. Actually let’s just give them the death penalty to be safe.


Im_Not_That_Smart_

Isn’t Alabama one of those schools that claims a bunch of titles that are rather dubious.


MUTUALDESTRUCTION69

I think there’s like some weird shit where we claim one we shouldn’t and then we don’t claim one we should. My personal theory is that someone in administration fucked up the media guides once back in the 80s and we didn’t fix it.


BoukenGreen

There are 5 the NCAA recognizes Alabama having that are not claimed by Alabama 45, 66, 75, 77 ~~78~~, and 2016


FearlessAttempt

We should stop claiming 41 and start claiming 66.


AdmiralVorlauf

That’s A&M actually


robotunes

A bunch? No.  One? Yes.


sausageslinger11

One. 1941.


TbRays93Plumber26

Love it! Plus people...lay off the crack.


knownbuyer1

Excuse me, we do cocaine here at Princeton. Not crack


Mtndrums

Well, if y'all don't like it, make the Ivy League send teams to the playoffs....


NebraskaAvenue

This offseason has been brutal


ILoveSpartanBeavers

Mhmm yes yes...you made a lot of great points that I didn't read. So let it be said, so let it be done!


Consistent_Train128

'Most deserving is not anything in the committee's lexicon' - Playoff committee chair prior to giving Bama a playoff bid circa 2023


boston_2004

What a shitpost haha I love it and I'm here for it.


BasebornManjack

Huzzah! Verily! Hear, hear! (Am I agreeing correctly in 1870’s Princeton? I only speak hillbilly)


Crimson2879

This is how to construct a proper shitpost. Take my upvote sir or ma'am. .....also, red team good, orange team bad.


TominNJ

If Alabama doesn’t win any more then Saban will become a Saint and that straw hat is not a suitable holy relic. It would clash with the houndstooth one they already have College football distracts Alabamians from the tornadoes and venomous snakes. They need it to keep from going insane Alabama winning championships isn’t as bad as other teams winning that I hate even more Red teams good orange teams bad


Sozadan

Jesus invented football.


SirMellencamp

The greatest American ever


GameBuster0703

Amen


grey_pilgrim_

I think Alabama doesn’t deserve another national championship because fuck em


PScooter63

This feels like satire.


LimerickJim

Get your rich alumni to sort our your NIL then


FaithFamilyFilm

Duh


therin_88

We just need Princeton to win a few more.


DWill23_

I think Bowling Green deserves to win 28 National Titles. Unbiased opinion


EWall100

VOL 🫵


knownbuyer1

Orange bros