I had one lined up from a recruitment agency. Sent me a job spec, I did my homework on the company, lined up nice and ready for the interview.
Got there - completely different set of skills needed for the job than advertised. The interviewer (one of two) basically said I don’t think you’re remotely qualified and frankly I wasted their time (much to the visible chagrin of his colleague) I was embarrassed as hell.
I responded that I advise he watch his manners as there was clearly a misunderstanding. I bid them farewell and left.
The recruiter rang me and apologised, but more interestingly the interviewers colleague rang me and apologised for the interviewers behaviour before inviting me back to talk about another job opening I was clearly sent for.
Couple of years later and I am legit a peer of the rude interviewer now and every time he cocks up I repeat those very words. Turns out he’s a good egg and actually finds it funny when I do. Apologised for himself on my first day and we get along pretty well now. But he’s mechanical and I’m a sparks, so, he’s dirt.
Similar sort of thing happened to me.
Agency arranged interview for an office job, turns out it was actually for a manufacturing job (company makes high spec car parts).
I'd turned up in a suit, the interview involved a practical session. I wasn't going to ruin my suit for a job I never wanted in the first place, so I put no effort into the practical side of it.
>Turns out he’s a good egg and actually finds it funny when I do. Apologised for himself on my first day and we get along pretty well now.
Funny how life works out sometimes. We're all on our own journey
This happened to me 7-8 years ago. Went for an engineering role and when they sat me down for the interview, they told me it was a PM role. I only prepped for the advertised role and my mind was completely in a different role. Did not get the job. I was told by my someone where I was employed at at the time that they can't do that, but I didn't bother checking it out or doing anything about it. The pay was rubbish anyway so no regrets.
I once proper shat myself and projectile vomited at an office job interview when I was 17.
Caught Norovirus. Felt absolutely fine until about 30 seconds into the interview. Then I was squirting through both ends in the space of about 10 seconds.
Started off being sick on their desk, then shitting myself while running for the door looking for the toilet.
They were very nice about it and even went to the shops and got me some new clothes.
I did not get the job.
I would never recover from this haha. One lad in my year shat himself in the toilets in year 9 and was never allowed to forget it, ended up moving schools.
When I was working at a government department, a lady came in for an interview and promptly died. Her husband was waiting for her outside and they had to break the news to him
And I still think your interview went worse.
I interviewed someone who was so nervous they made themselves physically sick. They threw up in to the waste paper bin next to the desk and then passed out. We had to call an ambulance, get the first aiders involved, the whole thing.
To be fair to the guy he did a pretty good job of getting his sick in to the bin but unfortunately for all involved it was one of those metal mesh bins so it just kind of acted like a sieve, and spread it out in a nice circular shape. We had to change the carpet in the office.
If this was me, I'd have folded myself up into the size of an envelope and posted myself to a distant land out of pure embarrassment. At least they were kind to you 😊
Worst - or best depending on how you look at it.
Was contacted by a recruitment agency about a job in the south of France. They agreed to fly me out there in the morning for a 11:00 interview and fly me back at 18:00 that evening.
Arrived at the company's reception desk and the receptionist had no idea why I was there. She called in a manager who also had no idea. I sat and waited while they phoned round asking if anyone was expecting an English guy to interview. Nobody had any idea what was going on. In the end they treated me to lunch including wine (French works canteens are brilliant), made profuse apologies and got me a taxi.
I took the taxi down to the beach and spent the day there lying in the sunshine and having a paddle. At 18:00 I flew home.
Didn't get the job - because there wasn't one. But had a great day at at their expense.
Postscript: It turned out the interview was bona fide but had been set up by a guy in the company who was fired the following day and never bothered to tell them or cancel it.
Went for a job interview that started at 10am. Got there for 9.50. Was kept waiting for 35 mins by the manager because “ he was finishing his breakfast”. Red flag 1.
Got onto the interview and they asked me the usual questions and then what my salary expectations were. I told them £10k more than I was earning as this had additional responsibilities and hours and was the current market rate. He laughed loudly.Red flag 2.
I was really embarrassed and asked for a glass of water as there was a jug on the side and he said it was for him and his other manager only. ( who hadn’t turned up!)
Red flag 3
Then he got out a pencil and paper from his pocket and started working out how much better I’d be on a lower salary because my commute would be 11 miles a day less and why I should accept this role at £8k less than I was asking.
Red flag 4
I decided I’d had enough and got up to leave only for him to say very sarcastically “thank you for wasting his time and leading him up the garden path by pretending to be interested”.
They went bump a couple of years later.
That's someone exercising their power over others. They're making sure you know they're higher up the food chain than you. It's a really outdated and small-minded way of dealing with people.
I had an interview and the room didn't have a table, just a few chairs opposite each other. They had an office dog. It was my time of the month and the dog dived head first into my crotch 😕
I was 18 interviewing for a part time job and was asked about my loyalty, stupid question really but I froze and didn’t have a clue how to answer so said “I’ve been with my girlfriend for 5 years”.
Didn’t get the job but I’m now 30 and married to the same girl so, “loyalty”…
To be fair that’s a pretty good answer for an 18 year old haha.
Only better thing I can think of would be “I’ve supported *insert shit football team* all my life.”
Supplied my CV for a role and the HR woman offers me an interview for something totally unrelated for which I have no experience. I correct her and arrange an interview for the role I applied for. I arrive on the day but security knows nothing about my visit.
The HR woman arrives (early 09:00 interview) and pretty much says "oh yeah" and dashes away to put together an interview committee.
As I'm chatting away in the interview with a man and a woman, I realise that the woman isn't chiming in as much and I'm not having the best back and forth rapport with her.
Turns out she's brand new to the company, in the very manager role that I'm currently applying for...
Interviewed for an IT job and they started asking me questions about a Database Analyst, I stopped the guy after about 3 questions and told him he was wasting both our times and he should learn how to write a better job description
Call centre job for a bank, I'd been out of work a few months and over the phone the person I spoke to said it was fine as long as it was less than 6 months, they didn't need any documentation for the gap in employment.
So I attend the interview, suited up, in a sling no less because I'd dislocated my arm the day before, but show up I did. Good chat with the interviewer, he seemed impressed by my commitment to turning up in that state (I really needed a bloody job, ok?) and then asks me if I've got my documents for my gap in employment. After some confusion we figured out that I'd been told wrong and they needed documents for any gap larger than THREE months. We sort of awkwardly coughed at each other, like we were both waiting for the other to tell us what to do next. After what felt like forever, he said we'd do the interview anyway and he'd go away and check the document issue with the recruitment team and get back to me.
Interview actually went pretty well but I never heard anything further. I assume the guy just took me through the interview because it was the least awkward way of getting me to leave, as opposed to say kicking me out in front of the whole office.
Documentation for a career gap just feels wrong to me. Why should someone always be working? Why should someone's employer be immediately entitled to know what else they've got going on in their lives?
"Yeah I was caring for my dying mother."
"My depression knocked me out for a few months and I've been working on myself."
"I really really hated my last job and needed a bit of distance."
"I went on a bender to Thailand with some mates but I'm back now and I'm here to work."
My life is my life. You're only buying the hours I sell you.
Almost, it can't be a family member or someone that lives with you but yeah, a reference (a note) who can vouch for you during that time to basically say you weren't in prison or on the run or something.
One guy that was in an intake batch of a newbies said he had breast cancer which is why he had an employment gap but he was actually in prison for fraud...
Im currently in the process of getting back into work after years off with severe mental health problems hospital stays etc. I have no idea what the hell to say if I am asked. Childcare responsibilities have been a factor but can’t really pin it all on that.
Contact Mind, they have a specific department to help people who have suffered with mental health issues get back into work. You will find though that a lot of employers are now far more understanding than you would envision - I can only imagine it would be very daunting though, so good luck.
I’ve always been honest about it with potential new employers “my mental health nosedived so I took some time to myself so I could get through it effectively” it shows you are aware of it/yourself and that you’re ready for the workplace again - good luck
It feels wrong to me too. When I applied for a job working for Teleperformance, the documentation requirements were seriously intense ... such as financial documents showing very specific transactions. If I was more conspiracy minded I would have thought that I was going to get my identity stolen. They even wanted travel documents such as tickets and itineraries and for proof as to why I wasn't employed during the 2020 pandemic.
If I was more conspiracy minded I would have thought that I was going to get my identity stolen.Luckily in my current job it wasn't as bad as that and I get paid more than I would have been paid by Teleperformance.
I forget whether it was a temp agency interview or a regular one but I had an interview for what was advertised as a top recruitment agency for high ranking CEO type roles.
I turned up to the “office” and it was just the director’s house where I had to enter through a lean-to. Had to do the interview in full earshot of the other staff there in the front room and I literally fucked up the first question about weaknesses when I said I wasn’t great over the phone (which was apparently still 99% of this company’s way of working in 2016).
Despite that, they were giving me good vibes like “we’re desperate and he’s the only applicant” and I was worried I might actually get the job.
Then the interviewer (and subsequently other staff and director) got super interested in the “hobbies” section of my CV because I mentioned about being a keen artist. They pressured me into showing them my DeviantArt profile, but half the stuff on there was not visible because of NSFW content warnings (I draw a lot of risqué pinup art). By that point I decided to intentionally bomb the interview so I basically told them I drew pornographic comics.
I got the following job though, been with the company ever since.
Interview panic presumably.
I had an interview in the summer where I was asked the classic question of how I would prioritise three urgent pieces of work; one from the marketing team, one regarding a customer complaint, and one direct from the CEO.
The interview had gone great up till then but for some reason this flustered me, so I said CEO first, then marketing, and then the customer complaint last (I over thought the 6 week window that complaints are usually given to be sorted).
Literally the worst answer to give 😅
Of course I realised how badly I'd answered as I was driving home so I immediately pulled into a car park and emailed the interviewer and basically apologised for my dumb answer, and gave the right one (customer first, then marketing, and finally the CEO as they should understand the need to prioritise the customer and then an internal team before them).
Thankfully not only did I get the job but it turns out my email is what swung it in my favour over another candidate with a bit more experience than me, as it demonstrated my enthusiasm for the role and my willingness to fix mistakes and correct myself.
By that point I had just given up and thought “might as well run with it” rather than try to salvage anything. I also wasn’t terribly mature back then so there’s that too.
Had a job interview with the carphone warehouse as a customer service assistant. Interview itself was held in the freezing attic of the building sat on dusty cardboard boxes. Interview itself went fine until he asked at the end “ jobs yours but you’re of childbearing age. I hope you’re not planning on any kids cos we need the staff”
Was going for Freeman's event planners. They wanted me as an in house graphic designer.
They gave me a laptop with no mouse, had to take one from another PC.
All assets were stolen from Google or other sources.
They wanted me to make both a printed advert and an animated screen display in an hour. Usually this shit takes 3x that per item.
They told me office "banter" was often towards the new guy. Just openly saying I'd be the target of abuse and they didn't like when I said I'd give back.
Eventually I told them it was the worst interview I'd ever been to, that their ethics were awful and planning for the role non existent. Which considering I was between jobs and desperate for money is a massive factor. Those guys were truly awful and were shocked being called out on it.
Fuck those guys.
They had celebrity clientele and I said I was really good at being confidential because we’d had curly watts from Corrie and elvis Costello as customers 🥴
Went for an interview about 15 years ago, met a great woman and the job was good. I was also desperate. Pretty much told me I'd got the job but they also had a more senior position and if I could spare another half an hour, to meet that person.
Second woman was full on weird.
Her only question "have you ever told a LIE?"
I panicked. Saying I'd never told a lie is a clear and obvious lie!
"Professionally, the only reason I could imagine not telling the truth would be to protect confidentiality and even then you'd say 'I couldn't talk about that because of confidentiality reasons"... thought I'd come up with a reasonable lie right there. Of course I've lied! We've all lied!
She wouldn't let it go. Rolled her eyes. Quizzed me for 20 minutes about if I lied to my friends, strangers etc etc etc.
It is absolutely fine to lie to be kind. Its human nature. Nobody saw you fall over / your pimple isn't noticeable...
She did not stop talking about lying and whether I've ever lied. I've no idea why, must have been wearing my dishonest face that day or she was crazy.
Never heard back.
> "have you ever told a LIE?"
This was a question that came up in the online questionnaire I had to fill in when applying for a job at Aldi. I answered truthfully, and said yes, as most of us have bent the truth at least once in our lives.
My application was not successful.
Ikea. Went to one of their open days as they were opening a new store. Was only one dressed in a suit and was trying to talk to one of the hiring managers. She had a very thick Spanish accent and couldn't understand my Yorkshire accent. Did t even get contacted back.
That happened to me in an interview at Primark, it was in a room full of other people getting interviewed so it was really loud to begin with, I was interviewed by a woman with a thick Polish accent, I have an Essex accent and she found it hard to understand me, when I left I was asked by another member of their staff how I got on and I explained the situation, nothing came of it though
Me - fresh out of university. Get a call from a recruiter, who has an entry level role lined up that seems like a good fit for me. The job description they sent through seems to match up to my skill set, but mentions they are looking to branch out in some new areas - so I make sure I do my homework on those so I can discuss it with them.
I get there, and they immediately make it clear that they’re not looking to branch out into those areas. They’re actively doing it, and need someone who has experience in it to just go with it.
I look at the cv they have, and it had been altered to make me seem much more experienced than I am - and they look at the job description I had printed out and see it’s also been altered to soften it
It was just embarrassing for both of us. And then the recruiter calls up to ask me how it went - and I was fuming at them. Told them exactly what I thought, and hung up.
They tried to call back, both on my home and mobile - I kept hanging up, or just didn’t speak (we couldn’t block it on the home phone). Said that whilst this one hadn’t worked out, they were sure they’d have something else coming through - but the experience had put me right off them.
I’ve had that as an interviewer. Started asking questions about something on their CV and they didn’t have great answers. Started digging in a little and the candidate got very confused until I showed them the copy of their CV I’d been sent and it had been altered by the recruitment agent. Wasted all our time and I’ve no idea what they expected to achieve other than getting banned from working with us in the future, which they did.
Hmm, I lived through Little Britain and the inbetweeners during my school and then College run. I think i'd have been relieved at someone doing the pen schtick.
Half the reason that scene is so memorable in WoWS is because the bloody 'sell me this pen' question had been an overused, lazy interview staple for decades
I've always figured that my response would just be to pocket the pen and say it's mine now. If they try and ask it back, then we can begin negotiations.
The worst interviewer was for a care agency where they were 45 minutes late to start, very obviously bored and didn’t seem to know what job I was being interviewed for and even rolled their eyes at one of my answers? The reception had a tiny dirty fish tank with pale looking fish which made me sad as I owned fish when I was younger. They offered me the job (!!) which I declined because of how bad the interview was, but they continued to pester me with job offer calls for 6 MONTHS after the interview offering me the job. I was younger then and didn’t know how to handle this besides hanging up but it took falling head office to finally stop the calls. Nightmarish.
Many years ago, I had an interview for a company in Leeds that was in March. They called to offer me the job in July, and were shocked to hear I'd got another role and hadn't been waiting by the phone for months, for them to call.
Was given an interview date for when I was away on holiday, managed to get it pushed back to the day after I was due back. Flight’s got delayed and after 25 hours of travelling I ended up having to go straight to the interview without having showered, shaved or changed clothes. Ended up being 5 minutes late and really not in the right frame of mind for a difficult technical interview.
I was applying for graduate software development jobs after I had finished uni and applied for some startup Shoreditch way, all seemed pretty normal.
I get there and one of the project managers (female, important for the story) met me downstairs at the main door, their office was a few floors up in a shared office block. I made normal small talk on the way to the office, she apologised for the lift not working and as we got to their floor she tripped on the top stair and literally fell into my arms.
These things happen, she seemed a bit embarrassed as you would be but all professional and I help her get steady on her feet, this is where things get weird. I look round and a guy is staring at us, staring at me specifically, absolute daggers, the guy was fucking fuming about something.
Turns out he’s the head of development and the other person to be interviewing me. The whole interview was one of the strangest experiences I’ve ever had and I’ve had a ton of interviews and done a ton of interviews since. The whole way through the guy was absolutely fuming, she would ask me a question, I’d go to answer and he’d interrupt me barely a word or two into the answer, when he asked me a question I’d start answering and he’d just be staring at her the whole time then I’d need to repeat myself because I’d finish my answer and it would just be silence whilst she awkwardly looked at me glancing back at him staring at her.
To this day I have no idea if they were in a relationship or if he just fancied her and thought I was some kind of threat because I stopped her from falling over??? Truly the oddest experience I’ve ever had in an interview, never heard from them again unsurprisingly.
I went for a job interview where the manager said I had lovely shoes and nice hands, then petted me on the knee whilst sat down. The man was like 70 and clearly gay and I needed the job.
He was such an odd character.
One of the other ones was pre-universal credit, when I was in crutches and rehabbing a torn ACL, I was sent to an interview by the job centre which was for a security guard at a shopping centre. Bless the interviewer, he took it seriously (as did I) but we both knew i wasn't get a job anytime soon.
The interview was pretty normal except it was in a loft with this presidential style office surrounded by taxidermy animals and shotguns mounted on the walls. It was for a job as a web developer for a small company. But things didn't get really weird until they offered me the job a couole of days later and it came to negotiating pay. Not a word of a lie they offered to pay me in coal.
It was a small company that sold coal and firewood, the owner thought that everyone needed coal and thought this was a reasonable option, they didn't want to pay hourly because they thought I would just waste time. Personally I think they just wanted some sucker to do hundreds of hours of work for them for essentially 0 cost.
First job interview - at Home Bargains.
"Tell me about a time you've been reliable."
What did I come out with?
Ah yeah, me and my mates nicked a bike when we were younger but then I grassed us all in.
I was left waiting for a manager to come to interview me as office staff in a care home, I was waiting about 25 minutes just listening to the residents crying and it absolutely stank so I got up and walked away, the door was locked I had to get the cleaning lady to let me out. I honestly think the guy was helping someone get dressed or using the loo he did ring me to ask why I didn't wait, but how long was I meant to wait
I was trying to leave one design job on the sly in order to find another. During my hunt I’d figured out a discreet system where I could leave my portfolio - with my BiL’s iPad inside - at his office, a few tube stops away. He was letting me use it to keep samples of my work on because at this point in my career I couldn’t afford my own.
I stopped off to collect it from reception on the way to an interview I had and jumped on the central line. It was mid summer and hot as hell - bad enough - but then the train suddenly decided to wait for 10 mins at a red light. Maybe it was nerves or maybe it was something I ate but while the train was being held my bowels started kicking off big time.
By the time I emerged from the station I was so desperate for a shit that I had to literally scurry-run to my interview. I arrived holding in a chocolate volcano and was visibly sweating. One of the guys interviewing me met me at the door and my first garbled words to him were: “HinicetomeetyoupleasecanIuseyourtoilet?”
He pointed me towards a tiny WC right by the open plan meeting room. I ran in and unleashed pure hell on that unsuspecting toilet. A good 10 mins went by before I emerged sheepishly to see the three interviewers sitting at the meeting room table, using every fibre of their being to pretend that the smell of acrid shit hadn’t just flooded their nostrils. One of them looked visibly disgusted at the sight of me.
I sat down; pale, shaking and still sweating and introduced myself. They asked what work I could show them to which I exclaimed I would fire up the iPad. I opened the portfolio… and the iPad wasn’t in there. Turns out the guy at reception had been bored and had taken it out to play games on it as he knew the code.
I showed them the one piece of work I had in my physical portfolio and then sat there sweating some more before saying “this isn’t going very well is it?”
The consensus was no.
Had one in a bookies.
"What's your biggest weakness?"
"I'm not great with numbers" I replied 🤣 fuck im a dildo haha. In my defence, I figured the machine just does it all so being number dumb shouldn't matter
I saw a job advertisement that was apparently retail but mentioned needing to able to handle 'challenging, emotional situations'.
Googled the company name- it was a chain of bookies.
Had in interview for a physics scientist position at a cancer centre. I got in a car accident the day before. I turned up with a neck brace, stick and a broken brain apparently, as I could not answer their question as to the measurement of radiation used in radiotherapy. I totally froze up- I kid you not. Their faces were a picture, and I think I actually cried on my way out the door. One of the worst and most embarrassing experience of my life 😵
Many years ago I had an interview in the Westminster branch of HSBO. Before the interview a very important looking man came over, shook my hand and asked my name. I followed him into the most fanciest room Ive ever been in. He sat down and said something along tje lines of "so, you wish to open up a (some banking jargon / rich persons) account with us?" I just stared blankly.
As it turns out, there were two aspectbrillant598s in the bank that day at exactly the same time. And I dont have a very common name. He apologised and led me out and then I saw him go into the room with an older man with a very expensive looking suit and briefcase. I then did my interview in a crappy office that was full of spare chairs and boxes. I didnt get the job.
In a year off from Uni after chaning courses I desperatly needed money. I took all sorts of jobs but I had a "trial period" of a week in a Double glazing business up in Newcastle. They didn't interview me per se as was going to use the trial period as the interview.
I was teamed up with a chap from "pre-sales". Essentially the role was to get appointments for the sales people. We got paid on volume of appointments alone.
The chap I was with basically went round to a council estate in Gateshead and, depending on the person who opened the door, either offered them a 4 pack or a bottle of wine in order to get them to say yes. Most of these folks didn't even own their home so couldn't have accepted a deal anyway. We got to the end of the day and I asked when we were going to get the booze, he just laughed at me and said that was never going to happen.
So these poor bastards would have to endure a hard sales pitch and didn't even get their plonk for it.
Utterly awful. I quit that evening. Never got paid, never cared
Got an interview for a research technician posting. Did a 5 hour round trip for the interview. In the interview, found out the job was nothing like the advert description. They wanted a glorified cleaner to keep the laboratory nneat and tidy after the medical students had been in.
Needless to say, I felt misled, and my lack of enthusiasm was made evident.
Interviewed for a cashier's job at a bookies. My maths was abysmal at the time and they gave me a test to do before I went in for the interview. I cheated and got my dad to give me the answers while he stood there pretending to watch the races. They called me in and quizzed me on a few questions similar to the ones on the test and I failed miserably and by then I was a nervous wreck and couldnt focus on anything else but how dry my mouth was. I got the "Describe yourself in one word" question to which I stupidly answered "unique". All I remember after that was coming out of the interview room covered in sweat and crying on the way home. Somehow I still got the job
Attended? About 25 years ago, I went for a job on the tech support lines at Virgin. At least, that's what the job centre had told me, but they interviewed me for a sales job instead which I had absolutely no interest in. Lots of very awkward confusion with everybody getting mad at each other.
Given? The person who was clearly trying to project confidence to cover up the fact that she was nervous as hell, and ended up going a bit manic. We called it off after she started bragging that her husband made a ton of money, so she could afford to apply for a job with such poor pay.
Had an interview at a school aa a full time tech helper. Me and this other guy sat waiting.and then we were walked around the building and interviewed together, he seemed to know a lot about the school. Turned out he already worked there part time and they had already decided he was getting the job. I shook his hand, wished him good luck, and stuck my fingers up at the interviewer and thanked him for wasting my time and my bus money.
I work in the entertainment industry as a tech. Went for a job about 10/15 years at a really prestigious venue and was really pinning my hopes on it. My cat pissed in my shoes overnight so had to go in my Crocs as they were the only black footwear I had. While trying to deal with that crisis I didn’t put my belt on so looked like a fucking tit with crocs on and my trousers falling down during the practical part of the interview.
Had the worst endometriosis flare up for like 2 years, was on my period and vomiting not long before my interview so was in agony
I had “no hospitality” and “NO night shifts” on my indeed ad and facebook ad as I refuse to ever return to that industry because of how extremely awful the pay is for such a demanding and hard job + I can’t work nights because of uni
Slug and lettuce reached out and said they had afternoon shifts available where I’d just make cocktails and serve food. I thought I’d go to the interview since the hours were fine, it wasn’t far from me and it’s a chain so not minimum wage but not good either and I was really struggling to get a job.
After having a nightmare with the clothes I was wearing to the interview and having to make myself presentable despite vomiting from the pain I was in I turned up and I was asked how I plan on getting home from my shifts because they finish at 2am and they don’t like sending girls home dead late on their own
I asked if it wasn’t an afternoon position and they were like “yeah we have some afternoon shifts available but we need you to work 6pm-2am for most shifts” so I don’t them I wouldn’t be able to continue with my application as I can’t work night shifts
They dragged me out of the foetal position in my worst flare up for nothing
I had an interview for Freshfields Bruckhaus Deringer. I'd been through several assessments to even get to interview stage. I was extremely qualified for the role and it would have been perfect as I'm doing a law degree so I'd already have a foot in the door at a top legal firm for a switch to a legal role once I've completed my degree.
Unfortunately less than 5 minutes before the interview I got a call from the school letting me know my son was sick and needed to be picked up. I managed to get my sister to collect him but I was extremely distracted. Strike 1.
I then joined the video call and despite me having checked the camera beforehand and it showing correctly for me they told me they could only see my forehead. Tried to fix it but eventually was told just forget it let's begin. Strike 2.
I was so distracted by worrying about my son and trying to ensure my face was in the frame I struggled to answer even simple questions. I wouldn't even have hired me.
Halfway through the interview I realised it was going just as badly as I thought when one of the women who was interviewing me started having a conversation with someone else. Didn't even have the courtesy to mute herself, just started having a conversation. Strike 3.
It was so bad that I didn't even get a rejection, they just never contacted me again.
Oh wow that's handy to know!
I'm one of those weird people who can find a silver lining in most anything, I love my current job and I wouldn't have this one if I'd been hired for that one so I'm glad overall that I didn't get it. At the time I was devastated though, it felt like the end of the world when it happened.
Not as bad as many in here, but job description (like many these days) didn't mention the times they wanted you there to work- not even vague phrases like 'weekends' or 'evenings'.
I put down hours I couldn't do on the application (also clearly explaining why I couldn't work those hours, that this was non negotiable due to the responsibilities i had at the time). Go to interview. Guy interviewing me explains that his boss didn't think he should bother interviewing me as the hours they really need people for are the hours i said i couldn't work on the application. But he thought he'd bring me to see if i was 'flexible'.
More fool me, i didn't just walk out. Spent about 15 minutes talking to the guy.
Interviewed for a car insurance call center. Bit of a backstory, I'd been fired from my two previous jobs so was lacking in confident a bit. Was halfway through the interview and the guy interviewing asked me about my previous employment, one of which had been a call centre (which I was fired from), and why I left. I told him about the job and was honest with him and told him i was fired from it and told him why (I didn't do anything wrong, it was just a shit company where I wasn't meeting impossible targets). The rest of the interview consists of him asking me why I think I got fired, asked in different ways every single time. I felt my confidence slip away with each one. Interview ended not long after. J didn't get the job
I had a tiny shaving cut that bled through my white shirt collar. Nobody told me. Not one person. Not even the receptionist who I was chatting to. None of the interviewers. No one and it was a lot of blood for a small cut! Didn’t get the job.
I had an online interview in 2021, everything was still COVID restricted so had to do one over Microsoft Teams, either I wanted to or not.
I started the interview, the interviewer was apparently the head of department but he spent most of the interview obviously scrolling on his phone, not paying attention and mumbling.
He mumbled on one of the very first questions, I asked him to repeat it and he did he just sort of looked at me like "Why are you looking at me" I tried to salvage the interview by just guessing what he said based on other interviews id done. I genuinely tried my best, It would make of been a brilliant interview if I had known what he was mumbling.
I must of screwed up somehow as he put a "Do Not Recruit" on me for the rest of the year on not just that company site but every one in the country. Got accepted on the same site a year later, in the neighbouring department where they couldn't understand why he DNR'd me or rejected me. The Head of department was baffled to see me there and Found out pretty soon he wasn't a nice guy and liked shouting at people form every department instead of doing his actual job.
I stayed at that company until this year when I had my son, even then i was begged to come in here and there as my replacement couldnt cope .I was going to return to be a manager but Personal reasons meant I had to move away, Over an hour away from the companies nearest site to my new town.
I had an interview for a part time job at some newspaper, the guy spent a good hour and a half just talking at me explaining the process, the software, the company history. I really didn't get a chance to get a word in edgeways.
At the end he said sorry you weren't successful, act questions?
It was a surreal experience
I went to an interview at Tesco's head office for a corporate role, except they had no clue who I was or what I was doing there. I grew increasingly desperate as my interview slot came and went only to be told that they had sent me to the wrong building. I was meant to go to their London office and not the Welwyn Garden office and my recruitment agent had fucked up. They arranged a new interview slot for me, the week I got a chest infection. I spent the entire interview coughing into tissues, much to the disgust of the people interviewing me. I did not get the job.
I had an interview arranged during my lunch break, in a large building just over the road from where I was currently working. We both knew it was going to be a squeeze to get it done in an hour, but we could finish anything off at a later date if it went well.
I arrived 5 mins early and had to wait 45 mins for the interviewer to turn up. I downplayed how late he was out of politeness, then he asked a series of questions getting more and more condescending until I gave the answer he was looking for, rather than any honest response. All the while I was stressed out of my nut because this was dragging things even longer and I was now an hour late back from lunch.
If I had more confidence at the time, I would have walked out as soon as my original hour was up
It was a panel interview, with two people interviewing me. One of the interviewers let out a loud fart. We both pretended not to hear what she did. I didn't get the job.
Mine was for some IT job. I can’t remember all the details now but I was to be the “IT guy” on site.
The interview started strangely as I wasn’t being interviewed by the company that would employ me, but by another company they wanted to subcontract me out to.
Instead of asking me about my skills and experience, the interview was more like a sales pitch. Like “Why should my company use Company A to source its IT staff.”
I really wanted, and needed the job, but found myself in a catch-22 situation. What I wanted to say was, “Look mate, I’m here to be interviewed for a job. I’m not here to discuss how you source your staff or where from.” Instead, I found myself playing along but couldn’t answer many of the questions since I knew virtually nothing about the company that would actually be paying my wages.
I think I did imply at one point that I didn’t really care who employed me, I just wanted the job and would do it well.
Needless to say, I wasn’t impressed with the whole thing. Nor was the person who interviewed me. And I gave the third party an earful when I spoke to them too. Such a shady operation. To sell yourself as an IT-outsourcer but then act as little more than a recruitment agency. Undoubtedly they would be creaming a good percentage off my salary every month if I’d been successful.
Christ, I have two.
First one, I applied for a job within my Mum’s workplace, for her team.
On the panel, was my Mum, her direct colleague, my ex, and a few more.
All on the panel knew me very well, knew I was competent in the role, could do it blindfold, but I went into a gabbling nervous wreck.
The person who got it, was a nightmare they couldn’t get rid of.
Second one, I was doing my best to leave a crap job, recruiter told me it was a fab opportunity which was payroll only. I told them I wanted Office Management, not payroll.
Encouraging me to still go for it, as that’s what they want.
I sat on the zoom call, immediately asked them the role and their expectations, finished the call with an apology for our time being wasted and the recruiter had wasted our time.
Called recruiter to inform them of such, and he tried to have a go.
Spoke to their boss who apologised, but never returned back to them.
I was quite young and was visiting a nature reserve, noticed they had a vacancy for a job in the kitchen of their cafe area. They said sure, let's do an interview right now. Then 3 people *in suits* sat down in front of me and grilled me about the origins of the company, the career of gordon ramsey and asked if I'd ever personally harmed a red squirrel. It was one of the weirdest experiences of my life and safe to say, I didn't get the job.
I'm a copywriter specialising in marketing and advertising. An agency once sent me for a role at the head office of a big fashion label. Pretty much the second or third question they asked me was which fashion influencers do I follow online and why.
I panicked.
I don't follow anyone online, especially influencers. Especially fashion influencers. The only remotely plausible name I could think of was David Beckham. Who I don't follow. Or know very much about. But I said his name anyway. Then they asked me why I particularly liked him. After fumbling around for a bit I just said you know what, if you're looking for someone intelligent and diligent who can write fantastic copy as fast as you want it in whatever style you want, I'm your man. If you want someone who spends their time following influencers online then this obviously isn't the role for me and we may as well end the interview now.
They ended the interview now.
This was 5 or 6 years ago and I still cringe about it today.
Sounds like you dodged a bullet, my guy. Sounds like their priorities were wrong - who cares who you follow online? It’s about performance and experience, not about Instagram gossip.
One of my first interviews, probably 25 years ago, and I was trying to be confident and extroverted. I was called into the room and went to shake the hands of the panel. One guy just stared at me, and didn't shake my hand. I then realised he was missing an arm. I just stammered an apology and went and sat down. I don't think I recovered from that.
From the other side of the table, I've had candidates:
* Roll up a cigarette on the table whilst in the final stages of the interview.
* Only give extremely short answers and then provide two thumbs up to indicate they were done talking. For example:
"From the knowledge you've gained regarding the role and our organisation, what do you think the role will be like, and what do you suspect will be the biggest challenges?"
"It's challenging"
*pause*
*two thumbs up*
* For remote interviews during the pandemic, a candidate answered the call whilst he was sat in the bath, having a wash. He later admitted he'd forgotten about the interview until his daughter brought him his laptop because Teams was ringing.
* Just after we started doing in person interviews again, a candidate insisted on shaking hands with the panel multiple times and was pressing knuckles, or pushing a finger into wrists and stuff. Pretty sure he was trying to use masonic handshakes, but we didn't recognise what they were, and just thought he was squeezing and pressing our hands in a weird way. His interview was distinctly average too.
* A lady gave an interview that was OK, but not top of the group. When I called to let her know she'd been unsuccessful, she screamed and yelled at me that I was pathetic and pushing a patriarchal agenda by not hiring her. She would apply for another job in my teams a year later. Surprisingly, she didn't get shortlisted. Her original interview had been fine but not standout. I probably wouldn't have remembered her, but since she'd insulted me and had a tantrum, I remembered her very well.
* A young man came in for an entry level role and had a very strong aftershave smell, but was giving a very solid interview until he suddenly got up, bolted from the room, and left. I tried to follow him, and found he was vomiting into a public bin. Turns out he'd been really nervous, and his Grandad had told him to drink a couple of double whiskies before the interview to settle his nerves and give him courage. All it did was make him ill!
I'm sure more will come to me. I've been a hiring manager for nearly a decade, and I've probably done two or three recruitment processes every year.
At the start of my career I interviewed for a £20k p/a admin job at a local further education college. They told me it was an all-day "recruitment event", so I had to take a full day off work.
The "recruitment day" consisted of taking two barely SAT-level English Language and Mathematics exams in the morning, then getting lunch (at our expense) as a group, then waiting in the cafeteria for our turn to be interviewed.
During the conversation, it transpired that one of the candidates was currently working the role we were all interviewing for as an agency worker. Probably 75% of the candidates got up and left at that revelation, but I decided to stick around because I am physically incapable of resisting the sunk cost fallacy.
I didn't get the job.
Panel interview over Zoom, me vs 5 women. Data Analyst job.
They would just keep throwing those shitty pseudo-psychology type of questions like "What animal would you be?", "Can you describe yourself in 3 words?", "What are your weaknesses?". "How would your friends describe you?", "What's your favourite colour?"
I admit, after about 30 mins of that, I lost my shit.
Once went for an Op job at a waste recycling company. Minimum wage and slightly overqualified but I'd been made redundant unexpectedly and I needed a job. 2009 for reference.
The guy sussed straight away those points and said that he'd rather I took a role a bit better suited. I agreed. Asked me to come back in on the Saturday and speak to the site manager.
Don't know what got lost in translation but when I went back I was hailed as the new Site Safety Messiah. All jobs would go through me, my own newly remolded department, own office, 40K a year, after a quick tour I was asked to give an ad hoc presentation there and then about new safety protocols I could implement, completely out of my depth and I tried to fumble my way through it, obviously made an absolute twat of myself and red faces all round.
Quickly shown the door and I rang the interviewer afterwards and asked what the hell happened. He had no idea but still offered me the Op job. Turned it down. Most embarrassing thing I've ever been through.
I work in an industry, and was going for a job as head of this thing for a big public sector company. It meant running the day to day operations of this element (think like a utility), so sorting it out when it went wrong, stakeholder management, new build projects, and procuring the thing every five years.
It was a massive step up for me, and there was a board member who specialised in this thing and asked me a direct question, and I remember thinking “he’s gonna stop talking in about five seconds and I’m going to have to answer, and I’ve got no idea what to say”.
This was still in lockdown and I remember thinking, could I slyly reach up to the wifi on my laptop and turn it off, and feign connection issues. I didn’t blag the question , just straight up told them I didn’t know.
The whole interview had difficult questions and it was clear I didn’t come from the kind of background they all did. I was only 26 at the time and they were all at the end of their career in senior management roles. Even worse, I hadn’t worked for six months and I was worried my desperation might show.
I got offered the job, and am celebrating three years soon. Apparently most of the other applicants were sales background which they didn’t want, where I was operational. I actually got a double pay rise my first year for a job well done (as in, moved up the scale twice in one go). It was crazy
I once had secured the job, but needed a meeting with the head of security for approval. He conned me into admitting using weed from time to time by making it seem like no big deal. Then I got a call saying job offer rescinded.
Yeah but it’s not like you admitted it to a random coworker, this was the literal head of security whose purpose in this interview was to try to weed out anyone they judge to be dodgy. I’m just trying to get my head around it lol. How did he con you into incriminating yourself?
Employment agency sent me to the interview "You're perfect, exactly what they are looking for!"
Discovered shortly after the interview began, that the job was for a traveling salesman. They 100% expected someone to provide their own vehicle and use it for door to door sales.
I did not drive and had no access to a vehicle. I wish I could say, it ended quite quickly after that..... but they insisted on carrying out the interview anyway and I was too awkward to leave.
First job interview was for pets at home, didnt know it was a group interview there was like 20 people and I had no idea it was gonna be like that. And my anxiety was just like noooooope
Was late at night and the normally automatic glass door was off and i tried to push it open nearly broke it, then tried to pull it when i was supposed to slide it, while everyones staring at me through the door
Put us into teams to do a group speech thing and I just silenty awkwardly stood in front of everyone trying not to cry while the rest of my team talked. Lots of other embarrassing stuff but yeah no I'm traumatised and never been to an interview again. worked at amazon since 💀
It included :
Vague yet very specific questions on the role and department - unless you worked at the actual office you would have had no chance - "So tell me, what software do we use for monitoring biscuit usage during the day?"
'Remote' interview - Stroking your cat when on camera as i am in the middle of answering the question you literally just asked shown you were not even bothered with the answer.
Including every other candidate in the 'teams' meeting invite for the day, rather than sending out 5 different ones.
Went for my first interview in a new field, it was technical but I knew the subject really well. I went blank, totally, on every question. They were really kind and could see I was nervous, they even tried to hint at the answers to help. Nothing. It was like they were interviewing a rando off the street.
After 20 minutes dying inside I apologised for wasting their time and left. By the time I got to the car, everything came back. 30 years later I still feel terrible for it.
I’ve had three that went badly…
One where I travelled from Amsterdam to Luxembourg where I was told the job required French. C++ programming. Late 90s.
One where the interviewer started to talk only about Star Trek. A Mac Pre-press C++ job in the early 90s.
Finally, a job where the interviewer wasted my time only to remind me I’d called him an idiot years ago. He was an idiot. Mid-2000s.
Oh, another one in Frome for a Mac C++ job where the company owner and his director drove me to Bournemouth and his home. That was just weird. Early 90s.
Not sure. I had a massive spot on my nose that I could see and it was all I could think about. I couldn’t turn my head to look at the interviewers because I’d fallen on a hill the day before and smacked my head. Kept losing my train of thought by the phone ringing every couple of minutes in the room we were in. It rang so much that they had to get guy to come back in and log out. Got all three jobs so maybe the situations reduce my nerves because they distracted me
Fresh out my undergraduate degree I get a call from a woman about an interview in medical sales. Not many details but I go to the interview. I get there and there are about 20 people for the same thing. The woman I spoke to on the phone and by email calls names and she says I'm not on her list and asks who told me. I tell her she did and she looks embarrassed and calls me in. Then I get put into a team and get sent to stand around outside a supermarket and get people to donate to a charity related to heart conditions. Then I get told there's no salary for the position, it's all commission. They "congratulate" me on making it to the next round and tell me to come back to the office. I just left, when I didn't arrive after 45 minutes they called me and I basically told them I'm not interested in such a shitty business. They reappeared with different names every few months and called me again a couple times.
Early 20's, interview for one of the usual shitty throwaway jobs in a call centre. Phone screening went well, so off to in person interview. Interviewer barely looked up and seemed dissinterested as soon as I walk through the door. Fine. Know the drill and left it.
Couple of weeks later I get another screening call, not thinking about it, then recieved details for an in person interview. Then I clicked. It was the same job. No one noticed.
Ended up interviewing three times in front of the same person and felt ridiculously pointless. Ended up working in a security job because I was the only one who turned up in a suit.
A few years ago I lost my job due to covid, so after looking for a couple of weeks I was contacted about a job but the first interview was a video interview. What they didn't tell me is that the video interview wasn't with a human it was just a hot which threw me off massively as the first thing I always do in an interview is get a good rapport with them. So anyway I got to the first question where it gives you so many seconds to think and then it will record your answer, and I just blanked out and then pretended to be dead still for the whole minute so they thought the call froze or something.
I don't have a passport so usually use my birth certificate and NI card for ID. Had an interview at Greggs and the interviewer was determined it wasn't a full birth certificate when it's the same method I've been using for like 15 years.
Also applied for for a kitchen assistant for a cafe in an arcade but the position was filled so got interviewed for working outside for the bouncy castle and stuff. Didn't get it but would have rejected it anyway.
Lastly an interview at weatherspoons where the head chef arranged a time with me but the actual interview managers didn't know so had to wait hours for the interview for them to be ready. Also didn't get the job but think I would have rejected it as they seemed very disorganised and not very good at communicating with each other.
My worst interview, the recruiter sent me to the wrong site of a multi academy trust. I was waiting for the interview only to be told this. At the time, I had no idea it was a MAT and assumed i would only be at one site.
I was then expected to go across the city in rush hour traffic to the right place.
I started on my way, but traffic was so heavy that i gave up and went home.
The interviewer rang me again on my way home, and i told them i was no longer interested. If they can screw up an interview location, what else is wrong.
10 years ago I had a recruiter find me online and put me forward for a 50k job. It was a 90min drive to get there, but I thought that was worth it.
Had my interview, it was good, but found out the job was 28k. Complained to the recruiter that they wasted my time but they did not care.
Also had three one hour long interviews at an IT company and was told I didn't get the job. When I asked for feedback they said I had a weak hand shake. Is that important working in a server warehouse?
It was recently. One-way video interview. Couldn’t even think of an answer to the first question so when the video clicked on, I panicked and said “shit”.
Went to reset the video but it uploaded instead. Didn’t even finish the “interview”
The first thing out of the interviewers mouth, in a sullen manner, as we entered the interview room was "we don't normally interview on Fridays". Sat down, basically threw a pen and test paper at me asking me to fill that out whilst he went to grab a drink.
Obvious this guy was going through the motions to fulfill an agency obligation so I shoved the completely unwritten paper to his side of the desk and waited for him to come back, which took fifteen minutes, and I wasn't hiding how angry I was.
He saw the look on my face as he came back in, then the unanswered paper and came out with an "ummm.." I gave him a bollocking for utterly wasting my time, got back home and gave the agency a bollocking too.
They arranged another interview sharpish, which was with a great company I spent nearly a decade with.
John Lewis.
Turned up for a highly technical IT role, sat down with the two interviewers to be told firstly I had an hour and a whiteboard to write a 10minute presentation on the pack of information infront of me and they'd be back for me to present after.
Looked at the pack and it was entirely unrelated to anything my role would touch. I don't remember now but it was HR stuff or some bollox.
I spent the first 15 minutes just debating walking out. What a waste of my time.
I did the stupid thing in the end, and quite frankly it was decent. Then a following hour for the actual interview where for the most part I was still pissed off.
Didn't get the job. Couldn't have been happier.
Worst - turned up to a cocktail bar after replying to a facebook post asking for emergency help. The owner was on cocaine, doing a line infront of me during the interview. Turns out the job was to clean their cellar, as rain water had got in and there were rat droppings everywhere. I declined. I nearly vomited because the smell was so bad. *And they were still open and serving people....*
Best? - NHS. Hands down. Easiest interview ever, happy people but professional. Got the job because I had done my homework.
Before I started my business up I applied to another engineering firm and when I went for the interview it was a manager who was younger than I was at the time (I was 28) and he must’ve been watching or reading some shitty advice about interview techniques as he made me sit on a tiny chair in the middle of the room while he sat behind a big desk looming over me. He also had an incredibly bright light on his desk that was pointing away from his desk at me like i was under the spotlight or in an interrogation room. He then spoke really fast and would interrupt me while I was talking and ask another question like he was trying to keep me on the toes.
I lasted about three minutes before I stood up and said “thank you for wasting my time” and left.
"Sell me this Bic" bollocks.
I'd driven to the shit hole that is Slough (hour and a half or so), to sit in a room with another interviewee and the recruiter and they gave me that shit.
I was well pissed off.
I told an interviewer that my wife was pregnant with our first child and he looked shocked. He asked how I thought having a child would affect my ability to work. I told him that other people had managed it before and it wasn’t like I was flying to Mars or something. They got pissy with me when I declined a second interview.
When I was in my early 20's i went for an interview at a bookshop. On the way I was distracted by some kids screaming (playing) in a school playground and walked into a lamp-post. I hit the deck and was out cold for a moment (woman came over and asked if I was okay). I arrived at the job interview a few minutes late with a huge bruise on my head and possible concussion. They asked me how it happened? It sort of went downhill from thereon in
Went for an interview at KFC when I was 17 and a full time student.
It was going really well until he said ‘What is Customer Mania?’
So I was like ‘What is it or my interpretation of it?’ And he just sat there staring at me blankly like he was dead inside.
I said ‘I’ve never heard of it before but my interpretation of it is when the restaurant is overburdened with customers, particularly on match day (it was the KFC on Pride Park) and we have to work as quickly, methodically and efficient as possible’.
Never heard back from them to even say I didn’t get the job 😂 Anyway! Glad I didn’t get the job, with ethos like that, it sounds like a fucking cult mentality.
‘We train our associates to be ‘Customer Maniacs’ 🤣
When I joined the police you used to have to go for a final interview and fitness test. You did the fitness test first which was a bleep test (as far as you could go), push and pull tests among some other things I have forgotten. After all that you then get your suit on get ushered into a small cramped corridor next to an interview room with paper thin walls where you can hear bits and pieces.
One by one you then got called into the interview room where you then sit in front of a panel consisting of a super intendant, an inspector someone from HR and I believe a sergeant.
You did a 35 minute interview, got pushed out for 10 minutes then go back in for 15 minutes debrief and find out there and then if you got the job. There were 15 of us applying and it was a fucking long day. Whilst waiting you also got to have your hair clipped for drugs test.
You if you failed you were escorted out of the room and had to walk past everyone else still waiting or who were successful. Really embarrassing for those people.
One of the girls had her interview, came out and during the wait time started going on about how fit the super was and how she wanted to crawl under the desk and nosh him off. She wasn't shy about it and she was quite loud. They didn't allow for the full discussion time because literally within a few seconds of her saying that the door swings open and she's called in followed by a few minutes later if her crying and running out the door to the exit.
I kinda felt bad for her but at the same time she probably had a bit of growing up to do. It was awkward as fuck after that and nobody spoke at all.
I was offered a job at a theme park despite not going to the second interview because I had just accepted a different job at a theatre.
I think they were so desperate for seasonal staff and I had performed well enough in the first interview. But… it was for 3 months, 0 hour contract, minimum wage and they expected you to buy the uniform.
I had an interview for a marketing position for a now-extinct company in Manchester.
They sent me and the other interviewee to shadow a guy who already worked there. The guy was a “self-made man” type, who was proud of the fact he didn’t go to university to get where he was. That in itself is perfectly fine, but he proceeded to rubbish and shit-talk the Masters degree I had just busted my balls to complete.
What’s far worse is that he made a lot of casually racist comments towards the other interviewee. She was ethnically Chinese, and he was saying things like “you’re so small, I could pick you up with chopsticks” and “what’s your favourite Jackie Chan film?” Luckily for him, she liked Jackie Chan and could answer that question, but she later confided in me that she was internally screaming every time he opened his mouth. I have no idea why he thought this was okay, maybe because he was an ethnic minority himself and thought that meant he could get away with it. I don’t know.
Onto the job itself. You know the people with clipboards that everyone desperately tries to avoid in town centres? That was the job. Flagging people down in the pissing down rain to ask about their gas meters. I was given some paperwork and deposited in the seating area of a chip shop with a cup of tea.
I sat trying to fill in this paperwork while an old woman at the next table glared at like me a belligerent scrotum wearing a fleece. It dawned on me that I’d far prefer cuddling a land mine than doing that job. After about 30 minutes, the chippy owner kicked me out.
We were taken back to the office where myself and the other interviewee were both sure we didn’t want the job.
When it was my turn and I was asked “on a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you want this job?” I answered “about a 5”. The interview was terminated there and then. Thank fuck.
I had a few interviews back in the summer and one of them was like a hidden camera show.
The first thing that went wrong was when they emailed me offering the interview, where they greeted me at the top with someone else's name.
This also raised a red flag as that email had been sent to me at half 7 in the morning, and when I replied to say thank you and to confirm they'd meant to email me, I got a reply at half 8 in the evening from them apologising for the mix-up, and yes it was me they wanted to invite to interview (incredibly long days by the sound of things!!).
The second was when I showed up to the office. I was told to go to the main reception and ask to go to floor three, when actually I was told by the building receptionist that office was on the second floor.
The third was when I reached the door to the office and there was nobody there to let me in for 5 minutes, until I saw a random person walk past who could buzz me in.
The fourth was when I got to the company's own reception desk where there was no receptionist. I waited a few minutes before getting my phone out and emailing the person I'd been in contact with on my phone to ask if 1) they were in, and 2) if they could come and get me.
The fifth was when the lady finally arrived and gave me a sheet of paper and a pencil, and asked me to write a SQL code to join multiple tables, filter, sort etc, and to come to a conclusion. Not very difficult but very outdated.
The 6th was when they started interviewing me and it was clear it was for the wrong job. Even after both myself and my interviews realised this, they continued asking questions I couldn't possibly answer.
The 7th was when the fire alarm went off halfway through the interview and we had to leave the office, only for the doors to jam.
After all that they still had the nerve to send me a rejection email, as though the experience of their workplace hasn't put me off completely already! It was very satisfying replying back to them saying I'd been offered a higher paying role elsewhere 😅
Some sales job in Australia, mid interview a gong goes off and the person interviewing me jumps out of their seat and goes into the main lobby to join the others in screaming, cheering, pots of "fuck yeah!" sort of stuff, all because someone had made a sale, decided that wasn't quite the role for me
I had an interviewer yawn in my interview, and then I my rejection email said they "didn't think I had passion for retail."
No one has a passion for retail!
Probably the one for being a cleaner on the kill floor of an abattoir. It was only over the phone, so at least that was something.
It had been described in the ad as a factory cleaning job, call for an interview, immediate start. When he said what the cleaning job was and what it involved in gory detail while I tried to keep my (veggie) lunch down I said I didn't think that would be the job for me. He then told me that a lot of people had said that, and he was surprised how difficult he was finding it to fill the position.
Aye pal, it's baffling. Minimum wage as well.
I turned up for an interview with a company. I pointed at the obviously Eastern European name written on the paper I had been given and made the most awful attempt at saying it. I mangled the name and had the stupidity to make fun of it. 1980s mindset
The woman I was talking to was the woman named on the paper. She took serious umbridge at my ridiculously bad attempt on her name.
The interview stopped there before we even sat down.
I didn't get the job
I had an interview for a placement year at a big company. It was a group activity type day, with one hour put aside for an interview. I barely answer any questions because I was so nervous, and at the end I get asked if I have any questions. In a moment of sheer panic I said yeah loads, they're just in my notebook in the other room. We go back into the other room and queue a 30 minute awkward silence where I basically hid in the corner because I had no questions and we had to wait for all the other candidates to come back.
Current employer, going for a promotion.
Had a really good shot, but during the run up my nan ended up being rushed into hospital with heart failure.
I'm very close to my nan, she was more like a mother to me... Tried to keep it separate, but completely fluffed it... Needless to say I didn't get the promotion this time round, but with everything going on at home, I'm not sure I would have been the best candidate at this time
Thankfully, my employers are awesome and have been extremely understanding throughout her illness and her passing.
I went to a job interview in Brum years ago, while I was walking through the office to get to the interview room, there was a massive banner with 'Good Luck Aftab!' written on it. Everyone in the office was staring at me like I had pooped in their hats! As I walked up, said Aftab was just finishing his interview, laughing and joking and shaking hands with the panel members. I suspected at this point I wasn't going to get the job!
They were clearly going through the motions and didn't even bother to contact me afterwards.
I've had 2 zingers... one very much my own cock-up but the other a textbook example of over zealous hiring practices.
I turned up for an interview very early in my career and landed in this large room with a panel of 4 interviewing. The core skill was something I hadn't encountered before so I took the stance of "I'm not going to bluff these folks, they'll see right through me." But that was probably a mistake because everything was about that skill and the whole interview went downhill from there. It finished with the final question "If we offered you the job, would you take it?" and I parted with a very hesitant, non-committal "Probably...?" (my thinking was that there'd be no way they'd be offering me the job - I knew it had gone badly - but came across as so dismissive... I cringed at myself)
The other was different... I'd matured a lot and was going for a senior position. One of those with a 5 stage hiring process. I made it to the last one and was assured it was a reasonably informal meet-and-greet - "Not many have got this far!" I was told. Turned out to be 2 hours of a pummelling from someone swinging their weight and learning nothing about me nor my abilities. Included ad hoc coding tests (despite me already having complete at-home tasks). It was just atrocious and I came out of it saying "I don't actually want to work there for that person".
Two spring to mind.
I was applying for a job a large earth moving company as part of their pre-graduate recruitment. I was told I had been shortlisted and to attend an interview "event". 300 other applicants were all in attendance and the process was a bit like a fast "The Apprentice" tv show - we all had tasks to perform to get through to the next round, with numbers dwindling. I managed to get through from 3000 original applicants to 300 on that day to 30 positions for a final interview the following week.
The following week I was so focused on the moment and putting all my mental energy into being able to get the position that when they asked me "How did you feel about the selection process last week?", I was unable to comprehend what even "last week" was or even my own name! Really weird but a great lesson (not at the time) in not being too stiff and worried about the interview.
Second one was when I graduated and went for an interview at a company my Dad had just interviewed for and didnt get the job, he spent the time talking about me and the interviewer asked me to put my CV in and would interview me.
Back in the day I had a long pony-tale and a just as long goatee - I trimmed this down to more usual levels and had my hair cut off to a more business-like look. Only to be told 10 seconds into the "interview" that there wasnt a job, he just wanted to see me and talk to me about my time a Uni..... \*sigh\*
I went for a TA interview, I was just out of uni and very nervous about it all. They were very nice and asked me certain questions, my brain just decided to stop working and I began to stutter, not able to find the words I needed to explain myself. It had all gone well up until this point.
They tried to help me but I began to shake and you could hear it in my voice.
They sent me a letter saying that they wished me the best and that they went with someone more experienced.
About six of us were being interviewed by two men at FatFace. After about 20 minutes they left, returning after about half an hour. They apparently saw nothing wrong with wandering off to have their lunch in the middle of our interview, without even offering us a cup of tea.
I was working at a language service provider for 2 years so it was an internal job, but i'd gone from their sourcing department to an interview for a project coordinator role; Basically, the guy who interviewed me was on his phone from the moment I sat down; Now, he could have been taking notes on his phone but he didn't really seem to be listening either, so I can only assume they already had someone in mind and were just going through the motions of having to interview people but dude, get the fuck off your phone and actually sound engaged that you're there - Almost, but not quite because I needed the job, told him that "if you're busy, we can do this another time" but god, what a dick.
Interview at Thorpe Park when I was around 17/18. Got there and it was a group interview, about 20 other peoples, and I saw they were all carrying trophies and stuff; turns out we were supposed to bring something that shows our ‘greatest achievement.’ We went round in a circle and when it got to me I had to say I hadn’t seen the instructions to bring something along and I didn’t have anything. Shortly after, an alarm went off on my phone that my friend had set thinking he was hilarious (in hindsight it totally was) and I just walked out in embarrassment.
I had one lined up from a recruitment agency. Sent me a job spec, I did my homework on the company, lined up nice and ready for the interview. Got there - completely different set of skills needed for the job than advertised. The interviewer (one of two) basically said I don’t think you’re remotely qualified and frankly I wasted their time (much to the visible chagrin of his colleague) I was embarrassed as hell. I responded that I advise he watch his manners as there was clearly a misunderstanding. I bid them farewell and left. The recruiter rang me and apologised, but more interestingly the interviewers colleague rang me and apologised for the interviewers behaviour before inviting me back to talk about another job opening I was clearly sent for. Couple of years later and I am legit a peer of the rude interviewer now and every time he cocks up I repeat those very words. Turns out he’s a good egg and actually finds it funny when I do. Apologised for himself on my first day and we get along pretty well now. But he’s mechanical and I’m a sparks, so, he’s dirt.
Similar sort of thing happened to me. Agency arranged interview for an office job, turns out it was actually for a manufacturing job (company makes high spec car parts). I'd turned up in a suit, the interview involved a practical session. I wasn't going to ruin my suit for a job I never wanted in the first place, so I put no effort into the practical side of it.
I’m a tech so I get the jobs the machanical lot won’t do :(
Too lazy to write a new job spec for the role and just rehashed an old one!
>Turns out he’s a good egg and actually finds it funny when I do. Apologised for himself on my first day and we get along pretty well now. Funny how life works out sometimes. We're all on our own journey
No, I don't think you understand. This guy was bad once, now the Internet needs to make sure he has no job and dies in poverty.
Harsh but fair.
This happened to me 7-8 years ago. Went for an engineering role and when they sat me down for the interview, they told me it was a PM role. I only prepped for the advertised role and my mind was completely in a different role. Did not get the job. I was told by my someone where I was employed at at the time that they can't do that, but I didn't bother checking it out or doing anything about it. The pay was rubbish anyway so no regrets.
I once proper shat myself and projectile vomited at an office job interview when I was 17. Caught Norovirus. Felt absolutely fine until about 30 seconds into the interview. Then I was squirting through both ends in the space of about 10 seconds. Started off being sick on their desk, then shitting myself while running for the door looking for the toilet. They were very nice about it and even went to the shops and got me some new clothes. I did not get the job.
I would never recover from this haha. One lad in my year shat himself in the toilets in year 9 and was never allowed to forget it, ended up moving schools.
Kind of why I'm glad I didn't get the job. I never told that story to anyone I worked with, ever.
Wow no- you win!
When I was working at a government department, a lady came in for an interview and promptly died. Her husband was waiting for her outside and they had to break the news to him And I still think your interview went worse.
I was not expecting the first sentence to end like that.
I interviewed someone who was so nervous they made themselves physically sick. They threw up in to the waste paper bin next to the desk and then passed out. We had to call an ambulance, get the first aiders involved, the whole thing. To be fair to the guy he did a pretty good job of getting his sick in to the bin but unfortunately for all involved it was one of those metal mesh bins so it just kind of acted like a sieve, and spread it out in a nice circular shape. We had to change the carpet in the office.
But you got new clothes. Not a total loss!
Clearly caught norovirus intentionally to scam free clothes out of the gullible interviewers. What a power move.
If this was me, I'd have folded myself up into the size of an envelope and posted myself to a distant land out of pure embarrassment. At least they were kind to you 😊
They clearly did not appreciate the shit you literally went through to try to get that job
I think you win.
No you didn't
Worst - or best depending on how you look at it. Was contacted by a recruitment agency about a job in the south of France. They agreed to fly me out there in the morning for a 11:00 interview and fly me back at 18:00 that evening. Arrived at the company's reception desk and the receptionist had no idea why I was there. She called in a manager who also had no idea. I sat and waited while they phoned round asking if anyone was expecting an English guy to interview. Nobody had any idea what was going on. In the end they treated me to lunch including wine (French works canteens are brilliant), made profuse apologies and got me a taxi. I took the taxi down to the beach and spent the day there lying in the sunshine and having a paddle. At 18:00 I flew home. Didn't get the job - because there wasn't one. But had a great day at at their expense. Postscript: It turned out the interview was bona fide but had been set up by a guy in the company who was fired the following day and never bothered to tell them or cancel it.
His final act was to give some random guy a free day out in the south of France, legend
Good guy.
Went for a job interview that started at 10am. Got there for 9.50. Was kept waiting for 35 mins by the manager because “ he was finishing his breakfast”. Red flag 1. Got onto the interview and they asked me the usual questions and then what my salary expectations were. I told them £10k more than I was earning as this had additional responsibilities and hours and was the current market rate. He laughed loudly.Red flag 2. I was really embarrassed and asked for a glass of water as there was a jug on the side and he said it was for him and his other manager only. ( who hadn’t turned up!) Red flag 3 Then he got out a pencil and paper from his pocket and started working out how much better I’d be on a lower salary because my commute would be 11 miles a day less and why I should accept this role at £8k less than I was asking. Red flag 4 I decided I’d had enough and got up to leave only for him to say very sarcastically “thank you for wasting his time and leading him up the garden path by pretending to be interested”. They went bump a couple of years later.
This guy sounds scary, defo got a screw loose
Completely agree, he should have listened to the nice manager and then maybe could have saved the poor company
That's someone exercising their power over others. They're making sure you know they're higher up the food chain than you. It's a really outdated and small-minded way of dealing with people.
I had an interview and the room didn't have a table, just a few chairs opposite each other. They had an office dog. It was my time of the month and the dog dived head first into my crotch 😕
That's ruff
Bloody hell
Bloody hell hound
Hellish bloodhound
I bet they were more embarrassed than you were!
I hope so!
I was 18 interviewing for a part time job and was asked about my loyalty, stupid question really but I froze and didn’t have a clue how to answer so said “I’ve been with my girlfriend for 5 years”. Didn’t get the job but I’m now 30 and married to the same girl so, “loyalty”…
To be fair that’s a pretty good answer for an 18 year old haha. Only better thing I can think of would be “I’ve supported *insert shit football team* all my life.”
If it was me interviewing you, I'd have laughed at that.. in a good way. Great response haha
Supplied my CV for a role and the HR woman offers me an interview for something totally unrelated for which I have no experience. I correct her and arrange an interview for the role I applied for. I arrive on the day but security knows nothing about my visit. The HR woman arrives (early 09:00 interview) and pretty much says "oh yeah" and dashes away to put together an interview committee. As I'm chatting away in the interview with a man and a woman, I realise that the woman isn't chiming in as much and I'm not having the best back and forth rapport with her. Turns out she's brand new to the company, in the very manager role that I'm currently applying for...
But they were opening up an additional role identical to hers because they were expanding the team, right?…Right?
Surprised the new manager didn't follow you out of the door to be honest
Interviewed for an IT job and they started asking me questions about a Database Analyst, I stopped the guy after about 3 questions and told him he was wasting both our times and he should learn how to write a better job description
Call centre job for a bank, I'd been out of work a few months and over the phone the person I spoke to said it was fine as long as it was less than 6 months, they didn't need any documentation for the gap in employment. So I attend the interview, suited up, in a sling no less because I'd dislocated my arm the day before, but show up I did. Good chat with the interviewer, he seemed impressed by my commitment to turning up in that state (I really needed a bloody job, ok?) and then asks me if I've got my documents for my gap in employment. After some confusion we figured out that I'd been told wrong and they needed documents for any gap larger than THREE months. We sort of awkwardly coughed at each other, like we were both waiting for the other to tell us what to do next. After what felt like forever, he said we'd do the interview anyway and he'd go away and check the document issue with the recruitment team and get back to me. Interview actually went pretty well but I never heard anything further. I assume the guy just took me through the interview because it was the least awkward way of getting me to leave, as opposed to say kicking me out in front of the whole office.
Documentation for a career gap just feels wrong to me. Why should someone always be working? Why should someone's employer be immediately entitled to know what else they've got going on in their lives? "Yeah I was caring for my dying mother." "My depression knocked me out for a few months and I've been working on myself." "I really really hated my last job and needed a bit of distance." "I went on a bender to Thailand with some mates but I'm back now and I'm here to work." My life is my life. You're only buying the hours I sell you.
And what sort of documentation would you have for an employment gap? A note from your mum?
Almost, it can't be a family member or someone that lives with you but yeah, a reference (a note) who can vouch for you during that time to basically say you weren't in prison or on the run or something. One guy that was in an intake batch of a newbies said he had breast cancer which is why he had an employment gap but he was actually in prison for fraud...
Im currently in the process of getting back into work after years off with severe mental health problems hospital stays etc. I have no idea what the hell to say if I am asked. Childcare responsibilities have been a factor but can’t really pin it all on that.
Contact Mind, they have a specific department to help people who have suffered with mental health issues get back into work. You will find though that a lot of employers are now far more understanding than you would envision - I can only imagine it would be very daunting though, so good luck.
I’ve always been honest about it with potential new employers “my mental health nosedived so I took some time to myself so I could get through it effectively” it shows you are aware of it/yourself and that you’re ready for the workplace again - good luck
It feels wrong to me too. When I applied for a job working for Teleperformance, the documentation requirements were seriously intense ... such as financial documents showing very specific transactions. If I was more conspiracy minded I would have thought that I was going to get my identity stolen. They even wanted travel documents such as tickets and itineraries and for proof as to why I wasn't employed during the 2020 pandemic. If I was more conspiracy minded I would have thought that I was going to get my identity stolen.Luckily in my current job it wasn't as bad as that and I get paid more than I would have been paid by Teleperformance.
travel itinerary?? either it was identity theft or your interviewer was an aspiring novelist cribbing notes from a stranger's life!
This is true and powerful and inspiring. not sure if you know it Happy Engineer but you are wise. thanks for this.
I forget whether it was a temp agency interview or a regular one but I had an interview for what was advertised as a top recruitment agency for high ranking CEO type roles. I turned up to the “office” and it was just the director’s house where I had to enter through a lean-to. Had to do the interview in full earshot of the other staff there in the front room and I literally fucked up the first question about weaknesses when I said I wasn’t great over the phone (which was apparently still 99% of this company’s way of working in 2016). Despite that, they were giving me good vibes like “we’re desperate and he’s the only applicant” and I was worried I might actually get the job. Then the interviewer (and subsequently other staff and director) got super interested in the “hobbies” section of my CV because I mentioned about being a keen artist. They pressured me into showing them my DeviantArt profile, but half the stuff on there was not visible because of NSFW content warnings (I draw a lot of risqué pinup art). By that point I decided to intentionally bomb the interview so I basically told them I drew pornographic comics. I got the following job though, been with the company ever since.
Why did you bomb the interview rather than play it cool and decline the offer if it came through?
Interview panic presumably. I had an interview in the summer where I was asked the classic question of how I would prioritise three urgent pieces of work; one from the marketing team, one regarding a customer complaint, and one direct from the CEO. The interview had gone great up till then but for some reason this flustered me, so I said CEO first, then marketing, and then the customer complaint last (I over thought the 6 week window that complaints are usually given to be sorted). Literally the worst answer to give 😅 Of course I realised how badly I'd answered as I was driving home so I immediately pulled into a car park and emailed the interviewer and basically apologised for my dumb answer, and gave the right one (customer first, then marketing, and finally the CEO as they should understand the need to prioritise the customer and then an internal team before them). Thankfully not only did I get the job but it turns out my email is what swung it in my favour over another candidate with a bit more experience than me, as it demonstrated my enthusiasm for the role and my willingness to fix mistakes and correct myself.
By that point I had just given up and thought “might as well run with it” rather than try to salvage anything. I also wasn’t terribly mature back then so there’s that too.
Had a job interview with the carphone warehouse as a customer service assistant. Interview itself was held in the freezing attic of the building sat on dusty cardboard boxes. Interview itself went fine until he asked at the end “ jobs yours but you’re of childbearing age. I hope you’re not planning on any kids cos we need the staff”
I'm pretty sure that's illegal now to ask that
Literally textbook discrimination. I’m sorry that happened shadydee!
Jesus christ, I hope you ran the fuck out of there!
Was going for Freeman's event planners. They wanted me as an in house graphic designer. They gave me a laptop with no mouse, had to take one from another PC. All assets were stolen from Google or other sources. They wanted me to make both a printed advert and an animated screen display in an hour. Usually this shit takes 3x that per item. They told me office "banter" was often towards the new guy. Just openly saying I'd be the target of abuse and they didn't like when I said I'd give back. Eventually I told them it was the worst interview I'd ever been to, that their ethics were awful and planning for the role non existent. Which considering I was between jobs and desperate for money is a massive factor. Those guys were truly awful and were shocked being called out on it. Fuck those guys.
They had celebrity clientele and I said I was really good at being confidential because we’d had curly watts from Corrie and elvis Costello as customers 🥴
Curly Watts though... impressive stuff.
Went for an interview about 15 years ago, met a great woman and the job was good. I was also desperate. Pretty much told me I'd got the job but they also had a more senior position and if I could spare another half an hour, to meet that person. Second woman was full on weird. Her only question "have you ever told a LIE?" I panicked. Saying I'd never told a lie is a clear and obvious lie! "Professionally, the only reason I could imagine not telling the truth would be to protect confidentiality and even then you'd say 'I couldn't talk about that because of confidentiality reasons"... thought I'd come up with a reasonable lie right there. Of course I've lied! We've all lied! She wouldn't let it go. Rolled her eyes. Quizzed me for 20 minutes about if I lied to my friends, strangers etc etc etc. It is absolutely fine to lie to be kind. Its human nature. Nobody saw you fall over / your pimple isn't noticeable... She did not stop talking about lying and whether I've ever lied. I've no idea why, must have been wearing my dishonest face that day or she was crazy. Never heard back.
> "have you ever told a LIE?" This was a question that came up in the online questionnaire I had to fill in when applying for a job at Aldi. I answered truthfully, and said yes, as most of us have bent the truth at least once in our lives. My application was not successful.
So the answer is: lie about it
She must have thought you’d lied about something and was trying to bait you into coming clean
Ikea. Went to one of their open days as they were opening a new store. Was only one dressed in a suit and was trying to talk to one of the hiring managers. She had a very thick Spanish accent and couldn't understand my Yorkshire accent. Did t even get contacted back.
That happened to me in an interview at Primark, it was in a room full of other people getting interviewed so it was really loud to begin with, I was interviewed by a woman with a thick Polish accent, I have an Essex accent and she found it hard to understand me, when I left I was asked by another member of their staff how I got on and I explained the situation, nothing came of it though
Me - fresh out of university. Get a call from a recruiter, who has an entry level role lined up that seems like a good fit for me. The job description they sent through seems to match up to my skill set, but mentions they are looking to branch out in some new areas - so I make sure I do my homework on those so I can discuss it with them. I get there, and they immediately make it clear that they’re not looking to branch out into those areas. They’re actively doing it, and need someone who has experience in it to just go with it. I look at the cv they have, and it had been altered to make me seem much more experienced than I am - and they look at the job description I had printed out and see it’s also been altered to soften it It was just embarrassing for both of us. And then the recruiter calls up to ask me how it went - and I was fuming at them. Told them exactly what I thought, and hung up. They tried to call back, both on my home and mobile - I kept hanging up, or just didn’t speak (we couldn’t block it on the home phone). Said that whilst this one hadn’t worked out, they were sure they’d have something else coming through - but the experience had put me right off them.
I’ve had that as an interviewer. Started asking questions about something on their CV and they didn’t have great answers. Started digging in a little and the candidate got very confused until I showed them the copy of their CV I’d been sent and it had been altered by the recruitment agent. Wasted all our time and I’ve no idea what they expected to achieve other than getting banned from working with us in the future, which they did.
Guy through me a pen and said “sell me this pen”. Someone watched Wolf of Wall Street and thought he was being clever.
I was in secondary school when that movie came out and all the lads thought they were genius by doing the sell me this pen bit
Hmm, I lived through Little Britain and the inbetweeners during my school and then College run. I think i'd have been relieved at someone doing the pen schtick.
Half the reason that scene is so memorable in WoWS is because the bloody 'sell me this pen' question had been an overused, lazy interview staple for decades
I would have seriously had to bite my tongue to stop myself from saying "but isn't this already your pen?"
I've always figured that my response would just be to pocket the pen and say it's mine now. If they try and ask it back, then we can begin negotiations.
that's been my go to move all three time some asshat has done this...
Well damn, I am clearly not the beacon of originality I thought I was :p
Did it work ??
'Sell me this pen' has been around for decades. I had it in an interview in 1999.
Same, 2003 I was asked to sell some bellend a pen in an interview.
No but I can make this pencil disappear :-)
Like magic? You're joking.
Taaa daa It's gone. By the way do you want to know how I got these scars?
The worst interviewer was for a care agency where they were 45 minutes late to start, very obviously bored and didn’t seem to know what job I was being interviewed for and even rolled their eyes at one of my answers? The reception had a tiny dirty fish tank with pale looking fish which made me sad as I owned fish when I was younger. They offered me the job (!!) which I declined because of how bad the interview was, but they continued to pester me with job offer calls for 6 MONTHS after the interview offering me the job. I was younger then and didn’t know how to handle this besides hanging up but it took falling head office to finally stop the calls. Nightmarish.
Many years ago, I had an interview for a company in Leeds that was in March. They called to offer me the job in July, and were shocked to hear I'd got another role and hadn't been waiting by the phone for months, for them to call.
I would have taken the fish with me on my way out
Was given an interview date for when I was away on holiday, managed to get it pushed back to the day after I was due back. Flight’s got delayed and after 25 hours of travelling I ended up having to go straight to the interview without having showered, shaved or changed clothes. Ended up being 5 minutes late and really not in the right frame of mind for a difficult technical interview.
I was applying for graduate software development jobs after I had finished uni and applied for some startup Shoreditch way, all seemed pretty normal. I get there and one of the project managers (female, important for the story) met me downstairs at the main door, their office was a few floors up in a shared office block. I made normal small talk on the way to the office, she apologised for the lift not working and as we got to their floor she tripped on the top stair and literally fell into my arms. These things happen, she seemed a bit embarrassed as you would be but all professional and I help her get steady on her feet, this is where things get weird. I look round and a guy is staring at us, staring at me specifically, absolute daggers, the guy was fucking fuming about something. Turns out he’s the head of development and the other person to be interviewing me. The whole interview was one of the strangest experiences I’ve ever had and I’ve had a ton of interviews and done a ton of interviews since. The whole way through the guy was absolutely fuming, she would ask me a question, I’d go to answer and he’d interrupt me barely a word or two into the answer, when he asked me a question I’d start answering and he’d just be staring at her the whole time then I’d need to repeat myself because I’d finish my answer and it would just be silence whilst she awkwardly looked at me glancing back at him staring at her. To this day I have no idea if they were in a relationship or if he just fancied her and thought I was some kind of threat because I stopped her from falling over??? Truly the oddest experience I’ve ever had in an interview, never heard from them again unsurprisingly.
This is wild and yet totally believable. Shoreditch tech is a weird place.
Yep. I interviewed at a place in Shoreditch, asked to use the loo halfway through and scarpered.
I went for a job interview where the manager said I had lovely shoes and nice hands, then petted me on the knee whilst sat down. The man was like 70 and clearly gay and I needed the job. He was such an odd character. One of the other ones was pre-universal credit, when I was in crutches and rehabbing a torn ACL, I was sent to an interview by the job centre which was for a security guard at a shopping centre. Bless the interviewer, he took it seriously (as did I) but we both knew i wasn't get a job anytime soon.
The interview was pretty normal except it was in a loft with this presidential style office surrounded by taxidermy animals and shotguns mounted on the walls. It was for a job as a web developer for a small company. But things didn't get really weird until they offered me the job a couole of days later and it came to negotiating pay. Not a word of a lie they offered to pay me in coal.
Nothing I have experienced in my life so far had a chance of preparing me for that final word.
What year was this??? 'everyone uses coal' and 'I'm a web developer' are statements that are surely separated by at least a decade.
Like 2018, about a month ot 2 before christmas.
CEO was on the naughty list and trying to offload a lifetime of sad stocking fillers
You must explain that last word further, you can’t leave us hanging like that!
It was a small company that sold coal and firewood, the owner thought that everyone needed coal and thought this was a reasonable option, they didn't want to pay hourly because they thought I would just waste time. Personally I think they just wanted some sucker to do hundreds of hours of work for them for essentially 0 cost.
So a coal merchant’s solution to reducing wage bill was to make their staff become competitors? Incredible.
First job interview - at Home Bargains. "Tell me about a time you've been reliable." What did I come out with? Ah yeah, me and my mates nicked a bike when we were younger but then I grassed us all in.
I was left waiting for a manager to come to interview me as office staff in a care home, I was waiting about 25 minutes just listening to the residents crying and it absolutely stank so I got up and walked away, the door was locked I had to get the cleaning lady to let me out. I honestly think the guy was helping someone get dressed or using the loo he did ring me to ask why I didn't wait, but how long was I meant to wait
I was trying to leave one design job on the sly in order to find another. During my hunt I’d figured out a discreet system where I could leave my portfolio - with my BiL’s iPad inside - at his office, a few tube stops away. He was letting me use it to keep samples of my work on because at this point in my career I couldn’t afford my own. I stopped off to collect it from reception on the way to an interview I had and jumped on the central line. It was mid summer and hot as hell - bad enough - but then the train suddenly decided to wait for 10 mins at a red light. Maybe it was nerves or maybe it was something I ate but while the train was being held my bowels started kicking off big time. By the time I emerged from the station I was so desperate for a shit that I had to literally scurry-run to my interview. I arrived holding in a chocolate volcano and was visibly sweating. One of the guys interviewing me met me at the door and my first garbled words to him were: “HinicetomeetyoupleasecanIuseyourtoilet?” He pointed me towards a tiny WC right by the open plan meeting room. I ran in and unleashed pure hell on that unsuspecting toilet. A good 10 mins went by before I emerged sheepishly to see the three interviewers sitting at the meeting room table, using every fibre of their being to pretend that the smell of acrid shit hadn’t just flooded their nostrils. One of them looked visibly disgusted at the sight of me. I sat down; pale, shaking and still sweating and introduced myself. They asked what work I could show them to which I exclaimed I would fire up the iPad. I opened the portfolio… and the iPad wasn’t in there. Turns out the guy at reception had been bored and had taken it out to play games on it as he knew the code. I showed them the one piece of work I had in my physical portfolio and then sat there sweating some more before saying “this isn’t going very well is it?” The consensus was no.
that was a masterpiece. first hearty laugh of the day. cheers.
You had me at "Chocolate volcano" 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Had one in a bookies. "What's your biggest weakness?" "I'm not great with numbers" I replied 🤣 fuck im a dildo haha. In my defence, I figured the machine just does it all so being number dumb shouldn't matter
I saw a job advertisement that was apparently retail but mentioned needing to able to handle 'challenging, emotional situations'. Googled the company name- it was a chain of bookies.
I’m not great with numbers and I am an engineer 😅
Had in interview for a physics scientist position at a cancer centre. I got in a car accident the day before. I turned up with a neck brace, stick and a broken brain apparently, as I could not answer their question as to the measurement of radiation used in radiotherapy. I totally froze up- I kid you not. Their faces were a picture, and I think I actually cried on my way out the door. One of the worst and most embarrassing experience of my life 😵
Many years ago I had an interview in the Westminster branch of HSBO. Before the interview a very important looking man came over, shook my hand and asked my name. I followed him into the most fanciest room Ive ever been in. He sat down and said something along tje lines of "so, you wish to open up a (some banking jargon / rich persons) account with us?" I just stared blankly. As it turns out, there were two aspectbrillant598s in the bank that day at exactly the same time. And I dont have a very common name. He apologised and led me out and then I saw him go into the room with an older man with a very expensive looking suit and briefcase. I then did my interview in a crappy office that was full of spare chairs and boxes. I didnt get the job.
In a year off from Uni after chaning courses I desperatly needed money. I took all sorts of jobs but I had a "trial period" of a week in a Double glazing business up in Newcastle. They didn't interview me per se as was going to use the trial period as the interview. I was teamed up with a chap from "pre-sales". Essentially the role was to get appointments for the sales people. We got paid on volume of appointments alone. The chap I was with basically went round to a council estate in Gateshead and, depending on the person who opened the door, either offered them a 4 pack or a bottle of wine in order to get them to say yes. Most of these folks didn't even own their home so couldn't have accepted a deal anyway. We got to the end of the day and I asked when we were going to get the booze, he just laughed at me and said that was never going to happen. So these poor bastards would have to endure a hard sales pitch and didn't even get their plonk for it. Utterly awful. I quit that evening. Never got paid, never cared
Got an interview for a research technician posting. Did a 5 hour round trip for the interview. In the interview, found out the job was nothing like the advert description. They wanted a glorified cleaner to keep the laboratory nneat and tidy after the medical students had been in. Needless to say, I felt misled, and my lack of enthusiasm was made evident.
One where we were made to wait in a reception area with other candidates, and one of those candidates was an existing colleague.
I once recruited for a role where we realised while shortlisting that candidate A was candidate B’s manager… we asked HR to schedule them well apart!
Interviewed for a cashier's job at a bookies. My maths was abysmal at the time and they gave me a test to do before I went in for the interview. I cheated and got my dad to give me the answers while he stood there pretending to watch the races. They called me in and quizzed me on a few questions similar to the ones on the test and I failed miserably and by then I was a nervous wreck and couldnt focus on anything else but how dry my mouth was. I got the "Describe yourself in one word" question to which I stupidly answered "unique". All I remember after that was coming out of the interview room covered in sweat and crying on the way home. Somehow I still got the job
Attended? About 25 years ago, I went for a job on the tech support lines at Virgin. At least, that's what the job centre had told me, but they interviewed me for a sales job instead which I had absolutely no interest in. Lots of very awkward confusion with everybody getting mad at each other. Given? The person who was clearly trying to project confidence to cover up the fact that she was nervous as hell, and ended up going a bit manic. We called it off after she started bragging that her husband made a ton of money, so she could afford to apply for a job with such poor pay.
Had an interview at a school aa a full time tech helper. Me and this other guy sat waiting.and then we were walked around the building and interviewed together, he seemed to know a lot about the school. Turned out he already worked there part time and they had already decided he was getting the job. I shook his hand, wished him good luck, and stuck my fingers up at the interviewer and thanked him for wasting my time and my bus money.
I work in the entertainment industry as a tech. Went for a job about 10/15 years at a really prestigious venue and was really pinning my hopes on it. My cat pissed in my shoes overnight so had to go in my Crocs as they were the only black footwear I had. While trying to deal with that crisis I didn’t put my belt on so looked like a fucking tit with crocs on and my trousers falling down during the practical part of the interview.
Had the worst endometriosis flare up for like 2 years, was on my period and vomiting not long before my interview so was in agony I had “no hospitality” and “NO night shifts” on my indeed ad and facebook ad as I refuse to ever return to that industry because of how extremely awful the pay is for such a demanding and hard job + I can’t work nights because of uni Slug and lettuce reached out and said they had afternoon shifts available where I’d just make cocktails and serve food. I thought I’d go to the interview since the hours were fine, it wasn’t far from me and it’s a chain so not minimum wage but not good either and I was really struggling to get a job. After having a nightmare with the clothes I was wearing to the interview and having to make myself presentable despite vomiting from the pain I was in I turned up and I was asked how I plan on getting home from my shifts because they finish at 2am and they don’t like sending girls home dead late on their own I asked if it wasn’t an afternoon position and they were like “yeah we have some afternoon shifts available but we need you to work 6pm-2am for most shifts” so I don’t them I wouldn’t be able to continue with my application as I can’t work night shifts They dragged me out of the foetal position in my worst flare up for nothing
I had an interview for Freshfields Bruckhaus Deringer. I'd been through several assessments to even get to interview stage. I was extremely qualified for the role and it would have been perfect as I'm doing a law degree so I'd already have a foot in the door at a top legal firm for a switch to a legal role once I've completed my degree. Unfortunately less than 5 minutes before the interview I got a call from the school letting me know my son was sick and needed to be picked up. I managed to get my sister to collect him but I was extremely distracted. Strike 1. I then joined the video call and despite me having checked the camera beforehand and it showing correctly for me they told me they could only see my forehead. Tried to fix it but eventually was told just forget it let's begin. Strike 2. I was so distracted by worrying about my son and trying to ensure my face was in the frame I struggled to answer even simple questions. I wouldn't even have hired me. Halfway through the interview I realised it was going just as badly as I thought when one of the women who was interviewing me started having a conversation with someone else. Didn't even have the courtesy to mute herself, just started having a conversation. Strike 3. It was so bad that I didn't even get a rejection, they just never contacted me again.
You have no idea how lucky you were to not get a job there...
Oh wow that's handy to know! I'm one of those weird people who can find a silver lining in most anything, I love my current job and I wouldn't have this one if I'd been hired for that one so I'm glad overall that I didn't get it. At the time I was devastated though, it felt like the end of the world when it happened.
Not as bad as many in here, but job description (like many these days) didn't mention the times they wanted you there to work- not even vague phrases like 'weekends' or 'evenings'. I put down hours I couldn't do on the application (also clearly explaining why I couldn't work those hours, that this was non negotiable due to the responsibilities i had at the time). Go to interview. Guy interviewing me explains that his boss didn't think he should bother interviewing me as the hours they really need people for are the hours i said i couldn't work on the application. But he thought he'd bring me to see if i was 'flexible'. More fool me, i didn't just walk out. Spent about 15 minutes talking to the guy.
Interviewed for a car insurance call center. Bit of a backstory, I'd been fired from my two previous jobs so was lacking in confident a bit. Was halfway through the interview and the guy interviewing asked me about my previous employment, one of which had been a call centre (which I was fired from), and why I left. I told him about the job and was honest with him and told him i was fired from it and told him why (I didn't do anything wrong, it was just a shit company where I wasn't meeting impossible targets). The rest of the interview consists of him asking me why I think I got fired, asked in different ways every single time. I felt my confidence slip away with each one. Interview ended not long after. J didn't get the job
I had a tiny shaving cut that bled through my white shirt collar. Nobody told me. Not one person. Not even the receptionist who I was chatting to. None of the interviewers. No one and it was a lot of blood for a small cut! Didn’t get the job.
I've heard hiring vampires is risky, so.
I had an online interview in 2021, everything was still COVID restricted so had to do one over Microsoft Teams, either I wanted to or not. I started the interview, the interviewer was apparently the head of department but he spent most of the interview obviously scrolling on his phone, not paying attention and mumbling. He mumbled on one of the very first questions, I asked him to repeat it and he did he just sort of looked at me like "Why are you looking at me" I tried to salvage the interview by just guessing what he said based on other interviews id done. I genuinely tried my best, It would make of been a brilliant interview if I had known what he was mumbling. I must of screwed up somehow as he put a "Do Not Recruit" on me for the rest of the year on not just that company site but every one in the country. Got accepted on the same site a year later, in the neighbouring department where they couldn't understand why he DNR'd me or rejected me. The Head of department was baffled to see me there and Found out pretty soon he wasn't a nice guy and liked shouting at people form every department instead of doing his actual job. I stayed at that company until this year when I had my son, even then i was begged to come in here and there as my replacement couldnt cope .I was going to return to be a manager but Personal reasons meant I had to move away, Over an hour away from the companies nearest site to my new town.
I had an interview for a part time job at some newspaper, the guy spent a good hour and a half just talking at me explaining the process, the software, the company history. I really didn't get a chance to get a word in edgeways. At the end he said sorry you weren't successful, act questions? It was a surreal experience
I had one where I noticed my hotness had been rated out of 10 on my CV. I was surprised in more than one way. I did not return their calls after.
go on, what did you get?
I went to an interview at Tesco's head office for a corporate role, except they had no clue who I was or what I was doing there. I grew increasingly desperate as my interview slot came and went only to be told that they had sent me to the wrong building. I was meant to go to their London office and not the Welwyn Garden office and my recruitment agent had fucked up. They arranged a new interview slot for me, the week I got a chest infection. I spent the entire interview coughing into tissues, much to the disgust of the people interviewing me. I did not get the job.
I had an interview arranged during my lunch break, in a large building just over the road from where I was currently working. We both knew it was going to be a squeeze to get it done in an hour, but we could finish anything off at a later date if it went well. I arrived 5 mins early and had to wait 45 mins for the interviewer to turn up. I downplayed how late he was out of politeness, then he asked a series of questions getting more and more condescending until I gave the answer he was looking for, rather than any honest response. All the while I was stressed out of my nut because this was dragging things even longer and I was now an hour late back from lunch. If I had more confidence at the time, I would have walked out as soon as my original hour was up
It was a panel interview, with two people interviewing me. One of the interviewers let out a loud fart. We both pretended not to hear what she did. I didn't get the job.
was it a test? how will the candidate react to an objectively funny noise...
Mine was for some IT job. I can’t remember all the details now but I was to be the “IT guy” on site. The interview started strangely as I wasn’t being interviewed by the company that would employ me, but by another company they wanted to subcontract me out to. Instead of asking me about my skills and experience, the interview was more like a sales pitch. Like “Why should my company use Company A to source its IT staff.” I really wanted, and needed the job, but found myself in a catch-22 situation. What I wanted to say was, “Look mate, I’m here to be interviewed for a job. I’m not here to discuss how you source your staff or where from.” Instead, I found myself playing along but couldn’t answer many of the questions since I knew virtually nothing about the company that would actually be paying my wages. I think I did imply at one point that I didn’t really care who employed me, I just wanted the job and would do it well. Needless to say, I wasn’t impressed with the whole thing. Nor was the person who interviewed me. And I gave the third party an earful when I spoke to them too. Such a shady operation. To sell yourself as an IT-outsourcer but then act as little more than a recruitment agency. Undoubtedly they would be creaming a good percentage off my salary every month if I’d been successful.
Christ, I have two. First one, I applied for a job within my Mum’s workplace, for her team. On the panel, was my Mum, her direct colleague, my ex, and a few more. All on the panel knew me very well, knew I was competent in the role, could do it blindfold, but I went into a gabbling nervous wreck. The person who got it, was a nightmare they couldn’t get rid of. Second one, I was doing my best to leave a crap job, recruiter told me it was a fab opportunity which was payroll only. I told them I wanted Office Management, not payroll. Encouraging me to still go for it, as that’s what they want. I sat on the zoom call, immediately asked them the role and their expectations, finished the call with an apology for our time being wasted and the recruiter had wasted our time. Called recruiter to inform them of such, and he tried to have a go. Spoke to their boss who apologised, but never returned back to them.
I was quite young and was visiting a nature reserve, noticed they had a vacancy for a job in the kitchen of their cafe area. They said sure, let's do an interview right now. Then 3 people *in suits* sat down in front of me and grilled me about the origins of the company, the career of gordon ramsey and asked if I'd ever personally harmed a red squirrel. It was one of the weirdest experiences of my life and safe to say, I didn't get the job.
yeah but... did you personally harm a red squirrel?
They're just so puntable
I'm a copywriter specialising in marketing and advertising. An agency once sent me for a role at the head office of a big fashion label. Pretty much the second or third question they asked me was which fashion influencers do I follow online and why. I panicked. I don't follow anyone online, especially influencers. Especially fashion influencers. The only remotely plausible name I could think of was David Beckham. Who I don't follow. Or know very much about. But I said his name anyway. Then they asked me why I particularly liked him. After fumbling around for a bit I just said you know what, if you're looking for someone intelligent and diligent who can write fantastic copy as fast as you want it in whatever style you want, I'm your man. If you want someone who spends their time following influencers online then this obviously isn't the role for me and we may as well end the interview now. They ended the interview now. This was 5 or 6 years ago and I still cringe about it today.
Sounds like you dodged a bullet, my guy. Sounds like their priorities were wrong - who cares who you follow online? It’s about performance and experience, not about Instagram gossip.
One of my first interviews, probably 25 years ago, and I was trying to be confident and extroverted. I was called into the room and went to shake the hands of the panel. One guy just stared at me, and didn't shake my hand. I then realised he was missing an arm. I just stammered an apology and went and sat down. I don't think I recovered from that. From the other side of the table, I've had candidates: * Roll up a cigarette on the table whilst in the final stages of the interview. * Only give extremely short answers and then provide two thumbs up to indicate they were done talking. For example: "From the knowledge you've gained regarding the role and our organisation, what do you think the role will be like, and what do you suspect will be the biggest challenges?" "It's challenging" *pause* *two thumbs up* * For remote interviews during the pandemic, a candidate answered the call whilst he was sat in the bath, having a wash. He later admitted he'd forgotten about the interview until his daughter brought him his laptop because Teams was ringing. * Just after we started doing in person interviews again, a candidate insisted on shaking hands with the panel multiple times and was pressing knuckles, or pushing a finger into wrists and stuff. Pretty sure he was trying to use masonic handshakes, but we didn't recognise what they were, and just thought he was squeezing and pressing our hands in a weird way. His interview was distinctly average too. * A lady gave an interview that was OK, but not top of the group. When I called to let her know she'd been unsuccessful, she screamed and yelled at me that I was pathetic and pushing a patriarchal agenda by not hiring her. She would apply for another job in my teams a year later. Surprisingly, she didn't get shortlisted. Her original interview had been fine but not standout. I probably wouldn't have remembered her, but since she'd insulted me and had a tantrum, I remembered her very well. * A young man came in for an entry level role and had a very strong aftershave smell, but was giving a very solid interview until he suddenly got up, bolted from the room, and left. I tried to follow him, and found he was vomiting into a public bin. Turns out he'd been really nervous, and his Grandad had told him to drink a couple of double whiskies before the interview to settle his nerves and give him courage. All it did was make him ill! I'm sure more will come to me. I've been a hiring manager for nearly a decade, and I've probably done two or three recruitment processes every year.
At the start of my career I interviewed for a £20k p/a admin job at a local further education college. They told me it was an all-day "recruitment event", so I had to take a full day off work. The "recruitment day" consisted of taking two barely SAT-level English Language and Mathematics exams in the morning, then getting lunch (at our expense) as a group, then waiting in the cafeteria for our turn to be interviewed. During the conversation, it transpired that one of the candidates was currently working the role we were all interviewing for as an agency worker. Probably 75% of the candidates got up and left at that revelation, but I decided to stick around because I am physically incapable of resisting the sunk cost fallacy. I didn't get the job.
Panel interview over Zoom, me vs 5 women. Data Analyst job. They would just keep throwing those shitty pseudo-psychology type of questions like "What animal would you be?", "Can you describe yourself in 3 words?", "What are your weaknesses?". "How would your friends describe you?", "What's your favourite colour?" I admit, after about 30 mins of that, I lost my shit.
Once went for an Op job at a waste recycling company. Minimum wage and slightly overqualified but I'd been made redundant unexpectedly and I needed a job. 2009 for reference. The guy sussed straight away those points and said that he'd rather I took a role a bit better suited. I agreed. Asked me to come back in on the Saturday and speak to the site manager. Don't know what got lost in translation but when I went back I was hailed as the new Site Safety Messiah. All jobs would go through me, my own newly remolded department, own office, 40K a year, after a quick tour I was asked to give an ad hoc presentation there and then about new safety protocols I could implement, completely out of my depth and I tried to fumble my way through it, obviously made an absolute twat of myself and red faces all round. Quickly shown the door and I rang the interviewer afterwards and asked what the hell happened. He had no idea but still offered me the Op job. Turned it down. Most embarrassing thing I've ever been through.
I work in an industry, and was going for a job as head of this thing for a big public sector company. It meant running the day to day operations of this element (think like a utility), so sorting it out when it went wrong, stakeholder management, new build projects, and procuring the thing every five years. It was a massive step up for me, and there was a board member who specialised in this thing and asked me a direct question, and I remember thinking “he’s gonna stop talking in about five seconds and I’m going to have to answer, and I’ve got no idea what to say”. This was still in lockdown and I remember thinking, could I slyly reach up to the wifi on my laptop and turn it off, and feign connection issues. I didn’t blag the question , just straight up told them I didn’t know. The whole interview had difficult questions and it was clear I didn’t come from the kind of background they all did. I was only 26 at the time and they were all at the end of their career in senior management roles. Even worse, I hadn’t worked for six months and I was worried my desperation might show. I got offered the job, and am celebrating three years soon. Apparently most of the other applicants were sales background which they didn’t want, where I was operational. I actually got a double pay rise my first year for a job well done (as in, moved up the scale twice in one go). It was crazy
I once had secured the job, but needed a meeting with the head of security for approval. He conned me into admitting using weed from time to time by making it seem like no big deal. Then I got a call saying job offer rescinded.
Why would you admit that? Just lie lol
It’s such a dumb system, they’d rather have a lair for an employee than someone who’s honest
Yeah but it’s not like you admitted it to a random coworker, this was the literal head of security whose purpose in this interview was to try to weed out anyone they judge to be dodgy. I’m just trying to get my head around it lol. How did he con you into incriminating yourself?
Employment agency sent me to the interview "You're perfect, exactly what they are looking for!" Discovered shortly after the interview began, that the job was for a traveling salesman. They 100% expected someone to provide their own vehicle and use it for door to door sales. I did not drive and had no access to a vehicle. I wish I could say, it ended quite quickly after that..... but they insisted on carrying out the interview anyway and I was too awkward to leave.
First job interview was for pets at home, didnt know it was a group interview there was like 20 people and I had no idea it was gonna be like that. And my anxiety was just like noooooope Was late at night and the normally automatic glass door was off and i tried to push it open nearly broke it, then tried to pull it when i was supposed to slide it, while everyones staring at me through the door Put us into teams to do a group speech thing and I just silenty awkwardly stood in front of everyone trying not to cry while the rest of my team talked. Lots of other embarrassing stuff but yeah no I'm traumatised and never been to an interview again. worked at amazon since 💀
the image of you trying to get through the door with them watching... golden. but I'm so sorry you're at amazon. crikey.
It included : Vague yet very specific questions on the role and department - unless you worked at the actual office you would have had no chance - "So tell me, what software do we use for monitoring biscuit usage during the day?" 'Remote' interview - Stroking your cat when on camera as i am in the middle of answering the question you literally just asked shown you were not even bothered with the answer. Including every other candidate in the 'teams' meeting invite for the day, rather than sending out 5 different ones.
Went for my first interview in a new field, it was technical but I knew the subject really well. I went blank, totally, on every question. They were really kind and could see I was nervous, they even tried to hint at the answers to help. Nothing. It was like they were interviewing a rando off the street. After 20 minutes dying inside I apologised for wasting their time and left. By the time I got to the car, everything came back. 30 years later I still feel terrible for it.
I’ve had three that went badly… One where I travelled from Amsterdam to Luxembourg where I was told the job required French. C++ programming. Late 90s. One where the interviewer started to talk only about Star Trek. A Mac Pre-press C++ job in the early 90s. Finally, a job where the interviewer wasted my time only to remind me I’d called him an idiot years ago. He was an idiot. Mid-2000s. Oh, another one in Frome for a Mac C++ job where the company owner and his director drove me to Bournemouth and his home. That was just weird. Early 90s.
The one thing I've taken from this comment is job interviews for roles that require C++ knowledge are fucking weird.
Not sure. I had a massive spot on my nose that I could see and it was all I could think about. I couldn’t turn my head to look at the interviewers because I’d fallen on a hill the day before and smacked my head. Kept losing my train of thought by the phone ringing every couple of minutes in the room we were in. It rang so much that they had to get guy to come back in and log out. Got all three jobs so maybe the situations reduce my nerves because they distracted me
Fresh out my undergraduate degree I get a call from a woman about an interview in medical sales. Not many details but I go to the interview. I get there and there are about 20 people for the same thing. The woman I spoke to on the phone and by email calls names and she says I'm not on her list and asks who told me. I tell her she did and she looks embarrassed and calls me in. Then I get put into a team and get sent to stand around outside a supermarket and get people to donate to a charity related to heart conditions. Then I get told there's no salary for the position, it's all commission. They "congratulate" me on making it to the next round and tell me to come back to the office. I just left, when I didn't arrive after 45 minutes they called me and I basically told them I'm not interested in such a shitty business. They reappeared with different names every few months and called me again a couple times.
Early 20's, interview for one of the usual shitty throwaway jobs in a call centre. Phone screening went well, so off to in person interview. Interviewer barely looked up and seemed dissinterested as soon as I walk through the door. Fine. Know the drill and left it. Couple of weeks later I get another screening call, not thinking about it, then recieved details for an in person interview. Then I clicked. It was the same job. No one noticed. Ended up interviewing three times in front of the same person and felt ridiculously pointless. Ended up working in a security job because I was the only one who turned up in a suit.
I think you encountered an NPC.
Sell me this pen 🤣🤣
A few years ago I lost my job due to covid, so after looking for a couple of weeks I was contacted about a job but the first interview was a video interview. What they didn't tell me is that the video interview wasn't with a human it was just a hot which threw me off massively as the first thing I always do in an interview is get a good rapport with them. So anyway I got to the first question where it gives you so many seconds to think and then it will record your answer, and I just blanked out and then pretended to be dead still for the whole minute so they thought the call froze or something.
I don't have a passport so usually use my birth certificate and NI card for ID. Had an interview at Greggs and the interviewer was determined it wasn't a full birth certificate when it's the same method I've been using for like 15 years. Also applied for for a kitchen assistant for a cafe in an arcade but the position was filled so got interviewed for working outside for the bouncy castle and stuff. Didn't get it but would have rejected it anyway. Lastly an interview at weatherspoons where the head chef arranged a time with me but the actual interview managers didn't know so had to wait hours for the interview for them to be ready. Also didn't get the job but think I would have rejected it as they seemed very disorganised and not very good at communicating with each other.
My worst interview, the recruiter sent me to the wrong site of a multi academy trust. I was waiting for the interview only to be told this. At the time, I had no idea it was a MAT and assumed i would only be at one site. I was then expected to go across the city in rush hour traffic to the right place. I started on my way, but traffic was so heavy that i gave up and went home. The interviewer rang me again on my way home, and i told them i was no longer interested. If they can screw up an interview location, what else is wrong.
10 years ago I had a recruiter find me online and put me forward for a 50k job. It was a 90min drive to get there, but I thought that was worth it. Had my interview, it was good, but found out the job was 28k. Complained to the recruiter that they wasted my time but they did not care. Also had three one hour long interviews at an IT company and was told I didn't get the job. When I asked for feedback they said I had a weak hand shake. Is that important working in a server warehouse?
It was recently. One-way video interview. Couldn’t even think of an answer to the first question so when the video clicked on, I panicked and said “shit”. Went to reset the video but it uploaded instead. Didn’t even finish the “interview”
The first thing out of the interviewers mouth, in a sullen manner, as we entered the interview room was "we don't normally interview on Fridays". Sat down, basically threw a pen and test paper at me asking me to fill that out whilst he went to grab a drink. Obvious this guy was going through the motions to fulfill an agency obligation so I shoved the completely unwritten paper to his side of the desk and waited for him to come back, which took fifteen minutes, and I wasn't hiding how angry I was. He saw the look on my face as he came back in, then the unanswered paper and came out with an "ummm.." I gave him a bollocking for utterly wasting my time, got back home and gave the agency a bollocking too. They arranged another interview sharpish, which was with a great company I spent nearly a decade with.
John Lewis. Turned up for a highly technical IT role, sat down with the two interviewers to be told firstly I had an hour and a whiteboard to write a 10minute presentation on the pack of information infront of me and they'd be back for me to present after. Looked at the pack and it was entirely unrelated to anything my role would touch. I don't remember now but it was HR stuff or some bollox. I spent the first 15 minutes just debating walking out. What a waste of my time. I did the stupid thing in the end, and quite frankly it was decent. Then a following hour for the actual interview where for the most part I was still pissed off. Didn't get the job. Couldn't have been happier.
Worst - turned up to a cocktail bar after replying to a facebook post asking for emergency help. The owner was on cocaine, doing a line infront of me during the interview. Turns out the job was to clean their cellar, as rain water had got in and there were rat droppings everywhere. I declined. I nearly vomited because the smell was so bad. *And they were still open and serving people....* Best? - NHS. Hands down. Easiest interview ever, happy people but professional. Got the job because I had done my homework.
Went for an interview for Lidl. Got the job. Worst interview of my life.
Before I started my business up I applied to another engineering firm and when I went for the interview it was a manager who was younger than I was at the time (I was 28) and he must’ve been watching or reading some shitty advice about interview techniques as he made me sit on a tiny chair in the middle of the room while he sat behind a big desk looming over me. He also had an incredibly bright light on his desk that was pointing away from his desk at me like i was under the spotlight or in an interrogation room. He then spoke really fast and would interrupt me while I was talking and ask another question like he was trying to keep me on the toes. I lasted about three minutes before I stood up and said “thank you for wasting my time” and left.
I went for an interview and it seemed like the owner just wanted to brag Turned down a second interview
"Sell me this Bic" bollocks. I'd driven to the shit hole that is Slough (hour and a half or so), to sit in a room with another interviewee and the recruiter and they gave me that shit. I was well pissed off.
Wernham Hogg? Manager with a goatee? Good bloke. Doesn't give shitty jobs
I told an interviewer that my wife was pregnant with our first child and he looked shocked. He asked how I thought having a child would affect my ability to work. I told him that other people had managed it before and it wasn’t like I was flying to Mars or something. They got pissy with me when I declined a second interview.
When I was in my early 20's i went for an interview at a bookshop. On the way I was distracted by some kids screaming (playing) in a school playground and walked into a lamp-post. I hit the deck and was out cold for a moment (woman came over and asked if I was okay). I arrived at the job interview a few minutes late with a huge bruise on my head and possible concussion. They asked me how it happened? It sort of went downhill from thereon in
An interview for a shitey sales job when I was in my twenties. 3 coke addled twats giggled through it and the only question was "sell us this pen".
Went for an interview at KFC when I was 17 and a full time student. It was going really well until he said ‘What is Customer Mania?’ So I was like ‘What is it or my interpretation of it?’ And he just sat there staring at me blankly like he was dead inside. I said ‘I’ve never heard of it before but my interpretation of it is when the restaurant is overburdened with customers, particularly on match day (it was the KFC on Pride Park) and we have to work as quickly, methodically and efficient as possible’. Never heard back from them to even say I didn’t get the job 😂 Anyway! Glad I didn’t get the job, with ethos like that, it sounds like a fucking cult mentality. ‘We train our associates to be ‘Customer Maniacs’ 🤣
When I joined the police you used to have to go for a final interview and fitness test. You did the fitness test first which was a bleep test (as far as you could go), push and pull tests among some other things I have forgotten. After all that you then get your suit on get ushered into a small cramped corridor next to an interview room with paper thin walls where you can hear bits and pieces. One by one you then got called into the interview room where you then sit in front of a panel consisting of a super intendant, an inspector someone from HR and I believe a sergeant. You did a 35 minute interview, got pushed out for 10 minutes then go back in for 15 minutes debrief and find out there and then if you got the job. There were 15 of us applying and it was a fucking long day. Whilst waiting you also got to have your hair clipped for drugs test. You if you failed you were escorted out of the room and had to walk past everyone else still waiting or who were successful. Really embarrassing for those people. One of the girls had her interview, came out and during the wait time started going on about how fit the super was and how she wanted to crawl under the desk and nosh him off. She wasn't shy about it and she was quite loud. They didn't allow for the full discussion time because literally within a few seconds of her saying that the door swings open and she's called in followed by a few minutes later if her crying and running out the door to the exit. I kinda felt bad for her but at the same time she probably had a bit of growing up to do. It was awkward as fuck after that and nobody spoke at all.
I was offered a job at a theme park despite not going to the second interview because I had just accepted a different job at a theatre. I think they were so desperate for seasonal staff and I had performed well enough in the first interview. But… it was for 3 months, 0 hour contract, minimum wage and they expected you to buy the uniform.
I had an interview for a marketing position for a now-extinct company in Manchester. They sent me and the other interviewee to shadow a guy who already worked there. The guy was a “self-made man” type, who was proud of the fact he didn’t go to university to get where he was. That in itself is perfectly fine, but he proceeded to rubbish and shit-talk the Masters degree I had just busted my balls to complete. What’s far worse is that he made a lot of casually racist comments towards the other interviewee. She was ethnically Chinese, and he was saying things like “you’re so small, I could pick you up with chopsticks” and “what’s your favourite Jackie Chan film?” Luckily for him, she liked Jackie Chan and could answer that question, but she later confided in me that she was internally screaming every time he opened his mouth. I have no idea why he thought this was okay, maybe because he was an ethnic minority himself and thought that meant he could get away with it. I don’t know. Onto the job itself. You know the people with clipboards that everyone desperately tries to avoid in town centres? That was the job. Flagging people down in the pissing down rain to ask about their gas meters. I was given some paperwork and deposited in the seating area of a chip shop with a cup of tea. I sat trying to fill in this paperwork while an old woman at the next table glared at like me a belligerent scrotum wearing a fleece. It dawned on me that I’d far prefer cuddling a land mine than doing that job. After about 30 minutes, the chippy owner kicked me out. We were taken back to the office where myself and the other interviewee were both sure we didn’t want the job. When it was my turn and I was asked “on a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you want this job?” I answered “about a 5”. The interview was terminated there and then. Thank fuck.
I had a few interviews back in the summer and one of them was like a hidden camera show. The first thing that went wrong was when they emailed me offering the interview, where they greeted me at the top with someone else's name. This also raised a red flag as that email had been sent to me at half 7 in the morning, and when I replied to say thank you and to confirm they'd meant to email me, I got a reply at half 8 in the evening from them apologising for the mix-up, and yes it was me they wanted to invite to interview (incredibly long days by the sound of things!!). The second was when I showed up to the office. I was told to go to the main reception and ask to go to floor three, when actually I was told by the building receptionist that office was on the second floor. The third was when I reached the door to the office and there was nobody there to let me in for 5 minutes, until I saw a random person walk past who could buzz me in. The fourth was when I got to the company's own reception desk where there was no receptionist. I waited a few minutes before getting my phone out and emailing the person I'd been in contact with on my phone to ask if 1) they were in, and 2) if they could come and get me. The fifth was when the lady finally arrived and gave me a sheet of paper and a pencil, and asked me to write a SQL code to join multiple tables, filter, sort etc, and to come to a conclusion. Not very difficult but very outdated. The 6th was when they started interviewing me and it was clear it was for the wrong job. Even after both myself and my interviews realised this, they continued asking questions I couldn't possibly answer. The 7th was when the fire alarm went off halfway through the interview and we had to leave the office, only for the doors to jam. After all that they still had the nerve to send me a rejection email, as though the experience of their workplace hasn't put me off completely already! It was very satisfying replying back to them saying I'd been offered a higher paying role elsewhere 😅
Some sales job in Australia, mid interview a gong goes off and the person interviewing me jumps out of their seat and goes into the main lobby to join the others in screaming, cheering, pots of "fuck yeah!" sort of stuff, all because someone had made a sale, decided that wasn't quite the role for me
I had an interviewer yawn in my interview, and then I my rejection email said they "didn't think I had passion for retail." No one has a passion for retail!
Probably the one for being a cleaner on the kill floor of an abattoir. It was only over the phone, so at least that was something. It had been described in the ad as a factory cleaning job, call for an interview, immediate start. When he said what the cleaning job was and what it involved in gory detail while I tried to keep my (veggie) lunch down I said I didn't think that would be the job for me. He then told me that a lot of people had said that, and he was surprised how difficult he was finding it to fill the position. Aye pal, it's baffling. Minimum wage as well.
I turned up for an interview with a company. I pointed at the obviously Eastern European name written on the paper I had been given and made the most awful attempt at saying it. I mangled the name and had the stupidity to make fun of it. 1980s mindset The woman I was talking to was the woman named on the paper. She took serious umbridge at my ridiculously bad attempt on her name. The interview stopped there before we even sat down. I didn't get the job
I had an interview for a placement year at a big company. It was a group activity type day, with one hour put aside for an interview. I barely answer any questions because I was so nervous, and at the end I get asked if I have any questions. In a moment of sheer panic I said yeah loads, they're just in my notebook in the other room. We go back into the other room and queue a 30 minute awkward silence where I basically hid in the corner because I had no questions and we had to wait for all the other candidates to come back.
Current employer, going for a promotion. Had a really good shot, but during the run up my nan ended up being rushed into hospital with heart failure. I'm very close to my nan, she was more like a mother to me... Tried to keep it separate, but completely fluffed it... Needless to say I didn't get the promotion this time round, but with everything going on at home, I'm not sure I would have been the best candidate at this time Thankfully, my employers are awesome and have been extremely understanding throughout her illness and her passing.
I went to a job interview in Brum years ago, while I was walking through the office to get to the interview room, there was a massive banner with 'Good Luck Aftab!' written on it. Everyone in the office was staring at me like I had pooped in their hats! As I walked up, said Aftab was just finishing his interview, laughing and joking and shaking hands with the panel members. I suspected at this point I wasn't going to get the job! They were clearly going through the motions and didn't even bother to contact me afterwards.
I've had 2 zingers... one very much my own cock-up but the other a textbook example of over zealous hiring practices. I turned up for an interview very early in my career and landed in this large room with a panel of 4 interviewing. The core skill was something I hadn't encountered before so I took the stance of "I'm not going to bluff these folks, they'll see right through me." But that was probably a mistake because everything was about that skill and the whole interview went downhill from there. It finished with the final question "If we offered you the job, would you take it?" and I parted with a very hesitant, non-committal "Probably...?" (my thinking was that there'd be no way they'd be offering me the job - I knew it had gone badly - but came across as so dismissive... I cringed at myself) The other was different... I'd matured a lot and was going for a senior position. One of those with a 5 stage hiring process. I made it to the last one and was assured it was a reasonably informal meet-and-greet - "Not many have got this far!" I was told. Turned out to be 2 hours of a pummelling from someone swinging their weight and learning nothing about me nor my abilities. Included ad hoc coding tests (despite me already having complete at-home tasks). It was just atrocious and I came out of it saying "I don't actually want to work there for that person".
Two spring to mind. I was applying for a job a large earth moving company as part of their pre-graduate recruitment. I was told I had been shortlisted and to attend an interview "event". 300 other applicants were all in attendance and the process was a bit like a fast "The Apprentice" tv show - we all had tasks to perform to get through to the next round, with numbers dwindling. I managed to get through from 3000 original applicants to 300 on that day to 30 positions for a final interview the following week. The following week I was so focused on the moment and putting all my mental energy into being able to get the position that when they asked me "How did you feel about the selection process last week?", I was unable to comprehend what even "last week" was or even my own name! Really weird but a great lesson (not at the time) in not being too stiff and worried about the interview. Second one was when I graduated and went for an interview at a company my Dad had just interviewed for and didnt get the job, he spent the time talking about me and the interviewer asked me to put my CV in and would interview me. Back in the day I had a long pony-tale and a just as long goatee - I trimmed this down to more usual levels and had my hair cut off to a more business-like look. Only to be told 10 seconds into the "interview" that there wasnt a job, he just wanted to see me and talk to me about my time a Uni..... \*sigh\*
I went for a TA interview, I was just out of uni and very nervous about it all. They were very nice and asked me certain questions, my brain just decided to stop working and I began to stutter, not able to find the words I needed to explain myself. It had all gone well up until this point. They tried to help me but I began to shake and you could hear it in my voice. They sent me a letter saying that they wished me the best and that they went with someone more experienced.
About six of us were being interviewed by two men at FatFace. After about 20 minutes they left, returning after about half an hour. They apparently saw nothing wrong with wandering off to have their lunch in the middle of our interview, without even offering us a cup of tea.
I was working at a language service provider for 2 years so it was an internal job, but i'd gone from their sourcing department to an interview for a project coordinator role; Basically, the guy who interviewed me was on his phone from the moment I sat down; Now, he could have been taking notes on his phone but he didn't really seem to be listening either, so I can only assume they already had someone in mind and were just going through the motions of having to interview people but dude, get the fuck off your phone and actually sound engaged that you're there - Almost, but not quite because I needed the job, told him that "if you're busy, we can do this another time" but god, what a dick.
Interview at Thorpe Park when I was around 17/18. Got there and it was a group interview, about 20 other peoples, and I saw they were all carrying trophies and stuff; turns out we were supposed to bring something that shows our ‘greatest achievement.’ We went round in a circle and when it got to me I had to say I hadn’t seen the instructions to bring something along and I didn’t have anything. Shortly after, an alarm went off on my phone that my friend had set thinking he was hilarious (in hindsight it totally was) and I just walked out in embarrassment.