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Rude people don’t do great jobs in my experience. They usually turn out to be entitled and lazy. Give yourself more time to look into cat sitters. Also look into cat homes because having a stranger in your house is dangerous.
There are apps like Rover, Meowtel, and comfortedkitty. Also don’t forget to do a background check.
There’s lots of reasons why someone might come across as “rude”. I don’t believe we can judge her character by that comment alone.
My circumstances were such that on this occasion it was quite last minute and there were limited options. It’s a learning. When I’m back I’ll interview some people so we have some good sitters lined up for the future.
Personally, I want my cats to remain in their home while we’re away. So I will continue with sitters. But no judgement to anyone who chooses differently 🙂
Thanks for the app / site suggestions. I’m in London in the UK. Options are fairly limited.
Where abouts in London? I'm in Buckinghamshire, I'd cat sit for you if I could! But I'm very ill these days and have my own cat as well... You could try putting up an ad in your local corner shop? Mine charges 50p a week.
Regardless of her reasons, part of her job is dealing with the people the cats live with. I'm way better with animals than humans and I often speak before thinking, but I wouldn't tell a stranger and potential employer something that rude.
Calling your hobby/decor “really weird” and questioning why you would do it is objectively rude no matter who it’s coming from. And especially for someone saying it on the job, being so rude while meeting a prospective client shows a lack of professionalism and good judgement. Two pretty big concerns when you’re entrusting your pet and home to a stranger. 😬
Remember how many of us collect just like you, and that having a hobby which brings you joy is a wonderful thing. Walking into a strangers house and being offended by what is a normal hobby? That’s weird. Judgemental people are so strange.
That reflects on her not you
But yes being this disrespectful would take away my trust too. Do you have a nanny cam? Or a friend who at least can pop in and ensure everything is on the level?
I have a camera I’m going to set up in the main room where the cats will be. I don’t have anything set up in the home office, but perhaps I should do, actually. Thanks for the prompt!
Nope. And it’s a rented property so I don’t want to go to the trouble of installing a padlock. But I do think the camera is a good idea and enough of a deterrent 🤞
It’s a rude and uncalled for comment for sure- you are just expressing your interests like a million billion other people. Would she say the same if it were sports memorabilia or sci fi fandom or even a book collection?
This is definitely a her problem- maybe she needs to work on her social skills? It sucks that you have to hire her because it wouldn’t make a good impression at all.
my house is a maximalist art cave of so many collections: me and my kid are 2 autistic people who collect EVERYTHING it is special interest central :) and we’ve influenced my boyf to collect and display his hobbies too. Lots of toys, lots of weird things and lots of everything. Some things are very personal special interests and if someone were to say anything negative towards the displays in the same context I would question why they felt the need to share that and if they want to be hired for any job they should keep her opinions to herself.
Remember that once it’s over you can forget this persons number and hopefully find someone else to look after your kittens if you need it. ❤️
> I would question why they felt the need to share that and if they want to be hired for any job they should keep her opinions to herself.
Exactly. There is never a good time to be so rude like this towards someone. But if you're working for someone? Especially in their home? You shouldn't be rude about their home!
I have a really thick skin, so shit like that doesn’t hurt my feelings, but it definitely makes me think WAY less of the person who does it.
Personally, I wouldn’t trust someone like that in my house, I would have escorted them out instantly, and just dealt with the stress of trying to find another. I can understand why others wouldn’t want to so no shame!
Is she with an agency or was she recommended by someone you know, a vet, a pet store, etc? I would definitely let them know that she is nosy and judgmental.
Well I think it’s also that thing of being under shock in the moment. I was also very stressed with work and with finding a sitter in the first place. Looking back, I wish I would’ve had a different response. But that’s the thing with hindsight, right?!
I found her through a cat sitting app. She has a lot of very good reviews, so I’m sure she’ll do the job well. But she won’t be coming back after.
You should bring it up before giving a bad review, like you would any faulty product etc, and see how she responds. It could be a miscommunication, or maybe she really does have some social awareness limitations, and you can make her aware of how it came across. I can put my foot in my mouth, I'm sure all the time. Usually I'll just cringe at myself and hope the other person didn't take it badly when that wasn't my intention, but I'm too embarrassed to make it a whole ordeal after the convo moves on. Other times when I find out something I said hurt someone's feelings, I can be totally surprised and learn from it. It might seem obvious to all of us, but it genuinely could be she just doesn't realise. If she responds poorly or dismissive towards your feedback, then go ahead with the negative review. (Just my opinion, I think it's good to give ppl q chance when it impacts their income, especially when it could be a genuine mistake or oversight.)
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I’m totally with you on this. All of us to a degree will have spoken before thinking. Some will do more than others - my boyfriend is neurodivergent and he’s a fantastic person (incredibly supportive of my hobby).. we’ve had to do quite a bit of work on communication in general but particularly on what other people might find rude and why. The world isn’t so black and white.
I haven’t judged her solely on those remarks. I spent a further 55 minutes or so with her. She came across as otherwise quite thoughtful and very caring towards the cats. She also works in the charity sector with a malaria charity. Cat sitting is just a side hustle because she loves cats so much (and the extra income can’t hurt!).
I respect everyone’s thoughts and opinions, but humbly suggest we take a moment before judging her character by that remark. The point of this post was really more related to how to deal with such remarks.. rather than judging the person who made them 😅
🫶
I'm so sorry that happened to you. I had a date tell me my collection was 'excessive' I blocked her the minute she left.
Please don't let anyone make you feel bad about your hobby. The sitter was in no position to make a comment like that.
Rude, wouldn’t leave my cats with someone that doesn’t value or at the minimum respect things that obviously make me happy.
Im sure they value something and if they don’t then they’re bland as white bread.
This reminds me of the people that had their house sat and they came home to all their houseplants mutilated and pillaged by a random child.
I know it's too late for you to find a replacement cat sitter but good grief, her comments were so rude and unnecessary. I'd accept it as a case of "foot in mouth" disease if she immediately apologized but it looks like she didn't. If you used any service/app to hire this person, I'd definitely mention her being rude to you, in your own home, in a review and definitely do not reccomend her to anyone else.
I'm just shocked that she would comment on a client's taste in home decor.
That is so bizarre of her, she didn’t need to say that, especially to your face?! 😭😭 Where are you from? Maybe a fellow doll collector will want to catsit for you!
I know, right?! 😭🥺
That’s a good shout! I live in south London, UK. If any fellow doll-collecting cat parents are reading this, please DM me 🥹🩷 would love to make friends!
https://preview.redd.it/7rnenj8vfh9d1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6f1bf0f00eff530e5024d41d26013e0c94947901
Here is Oscar with PJ, who looks scared stiff 😂
That is appallingly rude, I’m sorry it happened so last minute, it really sucks to be put in that position. People’s reactions to our collections are so varied. I once had an older man come to clean the carpets when I was moving years ago and he was so enamoured with my monster high dolls, it was really charming. Just because it’s different doesn’t make it weird and she was incredibly unprofessional, like keep it to yourself?? tell your friends?? I don’t understand the logic behind saying it to the person paying you to do a totally unrelated job. Zero manners :\ I know it’s easier said than done but try not to let it get to you, being so rude is a reflection on her, not you. I’m sure she’ll be totally fine with your cats, but when you get home you should definitely make a note in your review that her being inappropriate made you question her judgement/you would have found someone else because of it had time allowed. I hope you can still enjoy your trip, try not to stress too much! I’m sure it’s otherwise fine
Thanks so much, that’s a really kind and understanding comment.
I’ve begun reaching out to some other sitters already to schedule some meet and greets when I’m home so in future I can have some people I LIKE aaand trust lined up for the cats.
In the meantime, I agree with your sentiment that she’ll be fine with the cats 🫶 I need to somehow let it go. Understanding and kind comments like yours really help, so thank you 🙂
You are so welcome, I really hope you feel better about it all soon bc you sound like a lovely person and I hate to see a thoughtless comment set off this kind of anxiety. Sometimes a bit of reassurance can really help, we’ve all been there!
and that sounds like a great plan, I’m sure next time won’t be anything like this one again but you’ve done literally everything you can for right now. You’re doing an awesome job for your little guys!
You've already received a lot of supportive comments, but I'll tag on by saying that my life got a lot easier when I stopped taking things personally. My MIL says she has "no filter" as a reason for blurting out things like your cat sitter did, but I firmly believe that we are responsible for the words that come out of our mouth. I also believe that humans are imperfect and sometimes we say shitty things. 🤷🏻♀️ You keep doing you, and enjoy your trip! Are you bringing a doll with you?
I had a window contractor stop dead as he entered the doll/craft area and let out a gasp of a tough guy not trying to scream. After a few seconds, he simply said, "You like dolls, huh?" I think he handled it pretty well.
Some people just live in a different part of the Uncanny Valley, and that's ok. Being judgemental about others, however, is not.
I would be kinda livid that someone allowed themselves to be so unprofessional and share a personal opinion nobody's asked for.
Generally I try to avoid people who make me that uncomfortable whenever I can.
Maybe because I was lucky to have a friend who's an awesome adult woman with a very goofy side and once she told me "What was the reason to even grow up to deal with adult shit if you won't treat yourself with all the toys you can afford now?". She had very healthy aggressive reactions to people trying to fuck with her boundaries and I think I picked up a lot of that attitude from her.
Hope you get next time a nice person and wish you an awesome trip!
Wow that’s pretty uncalled for. I live in an apartment so I get maintenance coming through every quarter to inspect & they usually never say anything. One time I did have one guy who was like “wow you really like Bratz huh” and talked about his daughter liking them too but that was it lol
What kind of person walks into a potential client’s house and starts calling their things “weird”? This sitter is dumb AF. Makes you wonder how she stays in business if she habitually treats customers with contempt.
It’s of little consolation at the moment, but I’ve learned to turn peoples shite behaviour back on them. In this scenario, I’d have said “Wow. That’s a very insensitive comment - especially considering you want a job from me. What made you feel comfortable enough to come into my home and say such a thing?” These days everybody is alleging to want to spare peoples feelings but I have found the opposite is true. Put them on the spot. She needs to learn a little something about manners.
I would be so jealous if i saw your collection, just remember its not for everyone and being different and weird is something we have to learn to embrace 💕
Same, if I saw someone's home office filled with their collection of ANYTHING, I'm gonna love it because I love seeing what people are passionate about and they're gonna get all animated and excited when I ask questions!!
Also, totally agree about needing to *learn* to embrace our weirdness. It's a process. I consider myself a proud Weird, but I still have moments where I doubt myself and think "omg is [thing] *too* weird?" and my awesome friends will either say "it's not weird *enough*" or "oh yeah, that's super weird. I'm into that too, let's be weird about it together" 😂🧡
I know it’s hard to react in the moment. But being goth and getting name called in my teen years for it taught me some standard replies. Now as an adult my standard reply is : Thank you.
It throws them off, if they call me weird and I say thank you. If they actually ask why I say thank you, I explain that I have zero intentions of being normal. Normal is just another word for average. Most great artists, entrepreneurs and scientists etc., have been called weird. I don’t see anything good in being average, so weird is perfect, thank you.
And that’s truly how I see it. If the average adult can’t freely enjoy a harmless hobby that brings them joy and creativity, then I really don’t want to be the average adult. I mean why is she judging other people in their own home? Isn’t that kinda weird?
At this point in my life I just think it's funny and I'm not embarrassed or ashamed at all! Several years ago my then partner had a new friend come over. This is what he said when he saw my doll wall: "uhhh......it's nice that you support her hobbies." I still think about it and smile a little. He tried so hard to say something polite!
Sorry the sitter said that to you, very unprofessional! Maybe you should let her know they do sometimes follow people home and haunt them. :P
My kids make fun of me for my dolls. For a Secret Santa gift, I asked for some doll furniture (I do dioramas in a 3x4 square shelf unit). My son-in-law mocked me when I sincerely thanked him.
I just choose to act oblivious to their reactions. It's my hobby, and it makes me happy, so I don't care what they think!
I had my cousins and their kids come into the home that I shared with my Granny AFTER MY GRANNY’S FUNERAL and look around and criticize everything. You sleep in a twin bed? You’re an adult, that’s weird. You collect dolls? Really, Barbies AND Bratz and Star Wars figures? I’m a kid and I don’t collect those. Granny promised that painting can I have that? (I handed out one of Granny’s angels to each of them) I don’t like this angel can I have that (much more expensive) angel instead?
The vultures left with their hands full, one of whom stole a cheap but pretty necklace of mine, and my heart was broken. I actually sold a lot of my collection a couple of years later, partly because of the recession but partly because I was ashamed and heartbroken. I lost a piece of myself back then (2005). Joining reddit a couple of years ago, and finding this sub and Barbie and Rainbow High and Monster High, helped me find myself and accept myself again. And I am collecting and happy and trying to rebuy favorite dolls that I lost in sadness.
As of my cousins and their brats? Except for a few likes on their facebook posts, I have never seen or spoken to most of them again. I guess they wrote me off as too weird. I wrote them off as horrible people. They sound like they would get along with that cat sitter.
I agree with the general consensus: the sitter’s commentary was unprofessional and just.. super unnecessary. :/ I saw from other comments that you’ll secure the office as much as possible and (as someone else mentioned) not have to deal with her again after this - hooray!
So my take on how to deal with this type of criticism in the future… I imagine people like this were made to believe they weren’t allowed to enjoy childhood pastimes beyond a certain age, and they project that onto other people. It’s definitely a them problem, but it still feels lousy to be judged. I try to focus on my own joy - that’s why we collect dolls and such, right? They make us happy! Usually this leads to me feeling pity for the critic, because they’re probably looking outside themselves for happiness instead of reconnecting with the small, simple joys they left behind. And if they’re being irritatingly, unrelentingly critical, and making it extra hard for me to be empathetic, it usually helps to mentally chant something to the tune of, “Poor baby,” in an exaggerated way until I find the whole scenario silly. Makes it easier for me to shrug it off and move on. :’)
Hope this was at least a little bit helpful, lol. Enjoy your vacation!
You can stick with this one for now if you're happy with how well she'll care for your pets, but next time get a new sitter, and don't be afraid to tell the old one that you thank her for her work this time, but you're not comfortable hiring her again in the future since her remarks about your doll collection didn't sit right with you and you expect more professional behavior than that.
Wow what a joyless awful person they are- I'm so sorry that happened to you. Also though- you've got a bf, kittens, two adorable babies, a passion that you're able to engage in fully and a lovely home in which to do so. And what passions and joy do they have? Clearly not a lot since their reaction to something unique and interesting was to deliberately try and make you feel bad about it. Feel sorry for them- if they had the pleasure of being really into a hobby or the freedom to display that passion in their living space, they'd never have reacted like that. Have the lovely holiday you deserve, leave them to their weird bitterness <3
One way to think of it-- how boring for her to lack so much depth that she can only understand why someone would have stereotypical, conformist adult interests. Like she can't even politely grasp that the world offers an endless variety of harmless special interests that make people happy and that happiness is a good thing? Sounds like conformity and "being normal" was emotionally beat into her by others. Sounds sad and boring. Maybe she's the more conventional adult, but you're the liberated, creatively inspired, joyful one. You don't deserve to feel uncomfortable, so hire someone new the next time around.
Sometimes I think about others' more mundane and expensive special interests / collections. If many dudes can shamelessly collect a large variety of super expensive firearms (which is the case where I live), we can shamelessly collect reasonably priced, joy-inspiring dolls.
well make sure you lock the room before you leave and do not give her a key.
Also before you leave tell her they are all haunted.. :D
seriously tho never hire this one again .. what a rude person.
If something like that happens again, be blunt. Tell her that her comment is rude and hurtful, and not something you should say to a potential employer. My grandma’s “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all” is still excellent advice that more people should take.
I enjoy it when people think that. Granted, I seek out the dolls that look creepy because that’s my niche. So I would have replied with some crazy eyes and been like “be sure to keep the door shut at night.” 😂😂😂
Not everyone will love what you love, but finding a way to laugh about it helps. 🖤
Ok...I mean I can understand if dolls freak them out for whatever reason, but at least be professional and not say anything or if they bug you that much politely apologize and say you can't take the job.
Very rude and, i have to say, strange comment to make about a literal stranger.
Like shes here to catsit, what you do as a hobby is none of her bussines, unless its potentially harmful to her, which with dolls is obviously a ridiculous notion. So its her comment thats actually "wierd" here. I cant imagine going to someones home to apply for a job, that im going to be getting payed for, and make comments about their hobbies/home decore or anything of the sort. Absolutely ridiculous.
She should keep her mouth shut and concentrate on the cats.
But honestly theres nothing wrong with your hobby, people who get bothered by this are the wierdos actually or they are just boring people, who either dont have any hobbies of their own or they are the sort of people who only have socially acceptable hobbies, bc "what if people find me wierd for liking x/y/z?". Cant be me, lifes too short to be bothered by what other people think of me, im gonna live my best life and so should you! Enjoy your dolls and ignore the haters!
She’s completely disrespectful. I would not let her cat sit ever again. Knowing myself I would’ve said something back to her. Some of my sister in laws have said that my doll collecting is weird too. I completely changed the way I see them now. I didn’t get mad at them but I have a little resentment because they made fun of what I collect and what makes me happy. One of my other sister in laws is cool about what I collect. She collects a lot of Starbucks mugs 😆 so she’s a collector too.
She’s should have kept her mouth shut. She was there for a job. It’s disrespectful and a bad habit. She could loose out on jobs if she doesn’t learn to mind her own business. Her only concern should have been getting information on the cats and how to navigate in the place they live.
Having dolls and a collection is common. Like I’ve commented before collecting dolls goes all the way back to the Victorian period. Her comment is nothing but a small blip in your life, treat it that way. After you come back from your trip plan to never hire her again.
It's a reflection on their rigid view of what's normal, not a reflection on anything being wrong with you or your dolls. People who think dolls are "weird" in a bad way are usually very dull, boring people who have nothing in their lives besides copying and comparing themselves others. Intrinsic joy in a hobby isn't usually in their realm of capability, or else they'd find another person's interest fascinating or be curious about it, not judgmental (assuming it isn't hurting someone).
It sounds like you don't have a choice to cancel her work this time, so the only best thing you can do is find another sitter for the future. Don't worry about her opinion. It truthfully in the grand scheme of existence is entirely immaterial.
Yeah I literally do house and pet sitting as my second job and establishing trust with a client as quickly as possible is a huge priority for me? Like I have petsat for some truly weird and disgusting homes because hey - I'm poor and need as many gigs as I can get - but I still gave them just as much effort and did just as good a job as I would my favorite clients, because my priority is to care for the animals and take off the stress of leaving a beloved pet with a stranger. Like wtf I'd never comment like that, super unprofessional behavior. And even if I felt unsafe in someone's home I'd still just politely decline. Definitely get a different sitter and interview as far in advance as you can!
Oh no that’s absolutely rude to do to a stranger who is letting you into their home for employment of all things. I don’t like that interaction at all and would leave a review of something like
”I understand my hobbies are niche and some may find them uneasy, however, the lack of professionalism and rude statements/ sentiments towards my displayed collection of *insert collection here* in the privacy of my own office struck me in a way that I will now be looking for a new sitter. I hope this sitter finds employment she’s more comfortable to be around.”
I would just ignore her. As you know MANY adults are collectors. She doesn’t know you personally so who cares. I bet your friends and family wouldn’t judge you, right? People will always have something to say whether you’re “too skinny”, “too fat”, a “bad driver” or collect Barbie’s. I wouldn’t pay her any mind.
Ignore it! It is completely okay to like collecting dolls!
Ps. Set up cameras around your house to make sure that she does not do anything weird with your dolls!
I wish you had more time so you could find another sitter. I wouldn’t be pleased to have someone so judgmental in my home.
I ignore people who judge my dolls or miniatures. In some folks minds, these things are only for children. And that’s fine, because it’s my hobby, not theirs
I hope the cats bite her 😈😌
(Honestly though, that's awful, and sounds extra stressful because of the fact you had to work with her given the short notice. I hope it doesn't get you too down - I know a lot of us are fighting internalised shame or healing childhood trauma through our dolls, so in my experience it doesn't take a lot to feel ashamed or anxious about our collections. PS can we see your dioramas when you get back??)
Youd catch me hiding them in every corner of the house 🤭🤭 i love malicious compliance, you thought the shelf was creepy? Ohhh you just wait, ill show ya creepy! Jokes aside, im sad you have to deal with that, dont be scared to make a review related to the subject. Youre welcoming someone into your home, and if this girl wants to do this often and get good reviews she needs to learn to keep her mouth shut, at least until the homeowner leaves. You dont need to mention the collection, just say something along the lines of "did her job properly but made unnecessary and unprofessional comments about my home space" because its genuinely a bad look on her part and she needs to be made aware of it.
That was really unprofessional and unkind of her. Just remember that your collection brings YOU joy and that's what matters!
As a sidenote, don't worry about your cats, just because someone is rude doesn't mean they're going to neglect or abuse animals. (I also don't get the comments saying you should lock up your doll collection . . . Like, the sitter has no interest in them, why would she touch them . . . I would be more worried if they were an avid doll collector, then they might be tempted to take something, ha ha.) Have a great vacation!
Thank you.
My boyfriend and I have now managed to lock that room which is helpful as the cats shouldn’t be in there knocking over my dioramas anyway and gives us a safe space to store any valuables!
I agree with your sentiment, the lady was clearly passionate about animals and my cats took to her immediately. She also has good reviews from many others so I’m not concerned about leaving them in her care.
Ive already lined up another sitter to meet when I’m back, so hopefully after a few meet-and-greets I’ll find someone who I feel more comfortable with 😊
I would hope this was just a careless, extremely rude comment. I would also never hire this person again if I had to go with them. If I could leave a review, I would cite this as an example. People watching your family - pets or people - should not be causing you anxiety or making derogatory comments on your home. That's just sort of customer service basics.
Other people suggested cameras and I think that's a good idea for some peace of mind. Maybe you can ask a friend to check in or do you have neighbors who could pop in?
Hope all goes well on your trip!
I'm so sorry that happened to you, she was very rude and unprofessional. I collect dolls myself and have run into similar situations. I'd make sure some kind of camera is set up in your home. I'd personally have issues trusting a random rude person like that. Don't ever take her rudeness to heart! Collect and enjoy your hobby to your heart's content!
As a boy with a mother who was very embarrassed about me having dolls, she would make me feel ashamed for having them. I would have to keep them hidden in my closet in a garbage bag. I hated anytime I wanted to play with my doll house I would have to pull it out and set it all up. But what was worse, when I was done playing and had to disassemble the dollhouse and shove everything back in the garbage bag and hide it in the back of my closet. Growing up forcing to feel ashamed it continued into adulthood. I no longer played with them but kept collecting however I kept it secret only showing those I trust.
She sounds lame. Just so you know, it’s not weird to have a harmless & wholesome collection of trinkets that make you happy. This includes dolls. I think you’re cool as hell. Fire her!
You may have gotten her thinking about it, though. Maybe she never thought about being able to collect dolls as an adult. No matter what her random thought was, this will stick with her, and she might look at dolls differently. Just. Maybe.
I'm not gonna lie, I try to be more resilient when it comes to comments on things I enjoy, but my body tends to go into "freak out and hide everything you care about" mode when new people are introduced to my collection. I've had friends who have never been in my room, and when I get ready for them to come, I hide all my dolls in containers, even if it means there will be empty shelves on my walls. But at this point, I feel like it doesn't matter what people say about me or my interests
That’s awful :( Also super disrespectful to someone you’re about to work for. I’m dog sitting right now actually! Remember a lot of people find doll collecting to be really cool and many people do it too!
That's so rude... Imagine the situation where she is applying for a job... Or it is a camouflage. She says you are weird and then play with yours doll while you are gone!
It's NOT weird and this person is rude beyond belief. She basically showed up to a job interview and insulted her potential boss to their face.
If she advertises or is listed somewhere you can leave a review, I would definitely leave one after you get back.
Enjoy your trip and ignore the dumb remarks that were made by someone who clearly isn't any fun.
I would say it is super weird for you to come into my house and then criticize it (especially when you are paying them like where is the tact?) She is definitely the one who should be embarrassed. Hope the comments are making you feel a bit better about the situation.
Remember that her judgement about your hobby is not important. Your hobby brings you joy, and it hurts no one. There's absolutely nothing wrong with it. She'd probably be more comfortable if your hobby was drinking heavily and committing adultery, just because it was more familiar to her. But this is just someone with a closed mind.
Also remember that people face this kind of criticism and censure for things in their life far more integral to them than hobbies. Think of the harsh judgement LGBTQIA+ people experience for existing, for getting married, for adopting kids. Think about the judgement single moms experience for using welfare/SNAP benefits. Think about the judgement interracial couples experience for loving someone with a different colored skin.
Understand that close minded people will judge others harshly. But they literally do not matter. Their opinions do not matter. Do not try to shape your life to meet the approval of someone who judges others happiness harshly. They're probably miserable, and trying to bring everyone else down to their level. Furthermore, you're not trying too impress your cat sitter with your hobby, anyways. So what she thinks is irrelevant.
And, yes, lock the office door, because she's going to be snooping around in there.
I do actually think a lockable door is a fantastic idea, if it's possible. Even a hasp 'n' staple with a padlock hurriedly screwed to the door and frame would suffice. A doll collection is an investment of money and time. OP, your craft area is your happy place and should be wholly unavailable to people who don't respect that. It would also stop the kittens from some extra hidey holes :). That's an opinion, not a command, lol.
There are, as you say CertEcon, abundant reasons for others to judge another person. Judges gonna judge. Being on the receiving end generally feels personal, that they're pointing out something "allegedly" broken about you. I'm not surprised you're unsettled, OP, it's an added kick that the judge will be in charge of the very thing they're criticising as well as your young family members :(.
Locking a door protects your stuff, it's harder to guard your heart from fear. So I pray peace & confidence for you while you're away and I'm sure everyone here adds to that with their prayers, positive vibes and well wishes for you too :). Fretteth notteth!
I do my best to ignore them. These are things I like, they make me happy so what other people say shouldn’t matter. know there isn’t enough time for a new sitter, but after this time, don’t hire them again. I would also recommend some security for that room as a just in case so something doesn’t “accidentally” happen to anything in that room
In my opinion, people who judge or shame certain things are actually doing it because they have a repressed desire for wanting to do that thing as well, they hate seeing people doing what they themselves would like doing so they belittle or shame the object of their desire. I speak from personal experience because I am one of those people.
The other reason why people think something you do is weird is also because they don't understand it because they've never seen it. Finding something “weird” is a common reaction to novelty, don't take it personally.
These people a lot of times become intrigued by your activity and want to find out more about it. I speak from personal experience because this was my initial reaction to a doll collector (although I never voiced it like the cat sitter) but I quickly did my research and I ended up becoming a doll fan myself.
I was a sitter for about 4 years, and I would NEVER say this to a client, even if I thought it. I sat for a couple whose entire downstairs was covered in clowns and other "horror" type items, and guess what? I never mentioned it. Despite the fact I'm horribly afraid of clowns. Get a different sitter. What they said to you was wildly unprofessional. I can't even believe it.
I’m not sure if someone else has said this but I think it’s pretty important to mention this interaction in the review you give her. It’s a very intimate, vulnerable thing, inviting someone into your living space, and it was entirely unprofessional that she didn’t respect that.
Not only is it unprofessional but it is incredibly rude.
I understand that you need to hire her because of the short notice and her prior experience cat sitting but I would not invite her back into your home after this trip. I agree with other commenters saying to close the door, set up a nanny cam, and invest in a locking knob. If you aren't able to or are unwilling to change out the knob on the rental property then I'd absolutely get a cam that alerts you to motion and keeping the door closed. With how unprofessional her initial interaction with you was I wouldn't put it past her to go in there, snoop, take pictures, or be careful/respectful of your collection. I'd make it clear that the office is off limits. I would hate for any of your dolls to get misplaced or damaged and I'd especially hate for her to take pictures and mock your collection online or among her friends. I don't know if she'd actually go that far but she's already openly mocked you to your face on your first meeting as her potential employer so I wouldn't put it past her.
If it’s a possibility I would lock the door to that room. I know your cat might be more comfortable to wander into all rooms of the house but I would do that personally just to be safe haha.
Obviously it’s too late for a comeback, but I would pull an uno reverse card and make it seem like it’s weird that she asked, if it ever comes up again.
Look confused and respond, “Doesn’t everyone do something that makes them happy? I thought that was the norm.”
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Get another sitter, so rude. She'd never enter my house again
Yeah.. if I had a bit more time to find and meet another sitter, I would. But I don’t. I likely won’t continue with her again.
Rude people don’t do great jobs in my experience. They usually turn out to be entitled and lazy. Give yourself more time to look into cat sitters. Also look into cat homes because having a stranger in your house is dangerous. There are apps like Rover, Meowtel, and comfortedkitty. Also don’t forget to do a background check.
There’s lots of reasons why someone might come across as “rude”. I don’t believe we can judge her character by that comment alone. My circumstances were such that on this occasion it was quite last minute and there were limited options. It’s a learning. When I’m back I’ll interview some people so we have some good sitters lined up for the future. Personally, I want my cats to remain in their home while we’re away. So I will continue with sitters. But no judgement to anyone who chooses differently 🙂 Thanks for the app / site suggestions. I’m in London in the UK. Options are fairly limited.
Where abouts in London? I'm in Buckinghamshire, I'd cat sit for you if I could! But I'm very ill these days and have my own cat as well... You could try putting up an ad in your local corner shop? Mine charges 50p a week.
No that's rude and no excuse to say that.
I’ve been bitten twice by hiring rude people… the third time is not a charm.
This is strange take but hopefully it turns out well for you. It’s obvious you have an open heart… Blessings.
Regardless of her reasons, part of her job is dealing with the people the cats live with. I'm way better with animals than humans and I often speak before thinking, but I wouldn't tell a stranger and potential employer something that rude.
Calling your hobby/decor “really weird” and questioning why you would do it is objectively rude no matter who it’s coming from. And especially for someone saying it on the job, being so rude while meeting a prospective client shows a lack of professionalism and good judgement. Two pretty big concerns when you’re entrusting your pet and home to a stranger. 😬
If you really don't have another option I would close the room very securely so she can't enter "by accident". And never hire her again 🙃
I was going to say the same thing. Lock up those dolls, OP!
not only rude, just incredibly unprofessional.
Remember how many of us collect just like you, and that having a hobby which brings you joy is a wonderful thing. Walking into a strangers house and being offended by what is a normal hobby? That’s weird. Judgemental people are so strange.
Thank you 🩷
That reflects on her not you But yes being this disrespectful would take away my trust too. Do you have a nanny cam? Or a friend who at least can pop in and ensure everything is on the level?
I have a camera I’m going to set up in the main room where the cats will be. I don’t have anything set up in the home office, but perhaps I should do, actually. Thanks for the prompt!
Better safe than sorry!
Can you lock the office door?
Nope. And it’s a rented property so I don’t want to go to the trouble of installing a padlock. But I do think the camera is a good idea and enough of a deterrent 🤞
A key lock interior doorknob is generally pretty inexpensive and easy to install, but understandable if you don’t want to do it on a rental.
You’re probably right. Thanks for the suggestion, I’ll look into that today 🙂
Yeah I wouldn't trust them near my collection after that. People are insane.
NGL I'd be worried that she would do something like take photos and mock her "weird client" for social media clout.
Yep. Or downright trash stuff.
It’s a rude and uncalled for comment for sure- you are just expressing your interests like a million billion other people. Would she say the same if it were sports memorabilia or sci fi fandom or even a book collection? This is definitely a her problem- maybe she needs to work on her social skills? It sucks that you have to hire her because it wouldn’t make a good impression at all. my house is a maximalist art cave of so many collections: me and my kid are 2 autistic people who collect EVERYTHING it is special interest central :) and we’ve influenced my boyf to collect and display his hobbies too. Lots of toys, lots of weird things and lots of everything. Some things are very personal special interests and if someone were to say anything negative towards the displays in the same context I would question why they felt the need to share that and if they want to be hired for any job they should keep her opinions to herself. Remember that once it’s over you can forget this persons number and hopefully find someone else to look after your kittens if you need it. ❤️
Thanks so much, I really appreciate it. You’re totally right, in just over a week I can return home, block her and forget about her 🤩
> I would question why they felt the need to share that and if they want to be hired for any job they should keep her opinions to herself. Exactly. There is never a good time to be so rude like this towards someone. But if you're working for someone? Especially in their home? You shouldn't be rude about their home!
That's one way to loose a client. Lol. Like, who does that? Who comes into an employers house and bad mouths their decorations?
I have a really thick skin, so shit like that doesn’t hurt my feelings, but it definitely makes me think WAY less of the person who does it. Personally, I wouldn’t trust someone like that in my house, I would have escorted them out instantly, and just dealt with the stress of trying to find another. I can understand why others wouldn’t want to so no shame! Is she with an agency or was she recommended by someone you know, a vet, a pet store, etc? I would definitely let them know that she is nosy and judgmental.
Well I think it’s also that thing of being under shock in the moment. I was also very stressed with work and with finding a sitter in the first place. Looking back, I wish I would’ve had a different response. But that’s the thing with hindsight, right?! I found her through a cat sitting app. She has a lot of very good reviews, so I’m sure she’ll do the job well. But she won’t be coming back after.
Please leave a review after you get back mentioning it!
I absolutely will
You should bring it up before giving a bad review, like you would any faulty product etc, and see how she responds. It could be a miscommunication, or maybe she really does have some social awareness limitations, and you can make her aware of how it came across. I can put my foot in my mouth, I'm sure all the time. Usually I'll just cringe at myself and hope the other person didn't take it badly when that wasn't my intention, but I'm too embarrassed to make it a whole ordeal after the convo moves on. Other times when I find out something I said hurt someone's feelings, I can be totally surprised and learn from it. It might seem obvious to all of us, but it genuinely could be she just doesn't realise. If she responds poorly or dismissive towards your feedback, then go ahead with the negative review. (Just my opinion, I think it's good to give ppl q chance when it impacts their income, especially when it could be a genuine mistake or oversight.)
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I’m totally with you on this. All of us to a degree will have spoken before thinking. Some will do more than others - my boyfriend is neurodivergent and he’s a fantastic person (incredibly supportive of my hobby).. we’ve had to do quite a bit of work on communication in general but particularly on what other people might find rude and why. The world isn’t so black and white. I haven’t judged her solely on those remarks. I spent a further 55 minutes or so with her. She came across as otherwise quite thoughtful and very caring towards the cats. She also works in the charity sector with a malaria charity. Cat sitting is just a side hustle because she loves cats so much (and the extra income can’t hurt!). I respect everyone’s thoughts and opinions, but humbly suggest we take a moment before judging her character by that remark. The point of this post was really more related to how to deal with such remarks.. rather than judging the person who made them 😅 🫶
Make sure you giver her an honest review.
I'm so sorry that happened to you. I had a date tell me my collection was 'excessive' I blocked her the minute she left. Please don't let anyone make you feel bad about your hobby. The sitter was in no position to make a comment like that.
Thank you 🙏 I really appreciate that 🩷 and I’m sorry to hear about your date too. How awful!
Rude, wouldn’t leave my cats with someone that doesn’t value or at the minimum respect things that obviously make me happy. Im sure they value something and if they don’t then they’re bland as white bread. This reminds me of the people that had their house sat and they came home to all their houseplants mutilated and pillaged by a random child.
I know it's too late for you to find a replacement cat sitter but good grief, her comments were so rude and unnecessary. I'd accept it as a case of "foot in mouth" disease if she immediately apologized but it looks like she didn't. If you used any service/app to hire this person, I'd definitely mention her being rude to you, in your own home, in a review and definitely do not reccomend her to anyone else. I'm just shocked that she would comment on a client's taste in home decor.
What a FREAK! How can you go to someone’s house and mock their hobbies? Fire them asap!
That is so bizarre of her, she didn’t need to say that, especially to your face?! 😭😭 Where are you from? Maybe a fellow doll collector will want to catsit for you!
I know, right?! 😭🥺 That’s a good shout! I live in south London, UK. If any fellow doll-collecting cat parents are reading this, please DM me 🥹🩷 would love to make friends!
I don’t have cats but dogs 🥺 I’m in South Wales ❤️ hello fellow UK collector
Also a doll collector from South Wales, hi! 🩷
Omg let’s be friends 👉👈
Yes let's! 💖
Hello fellow doll-collecting cat parent in the UK! Can I request cat tax? 😻
https://preview.redd.it/7rnenj8vfh9d1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6f1bf0f00eff530e5024d41d26013e0c94947901 Here is Oscar with PJ, who looks scared stiff 😂
Malibu PJ! One of my childhood favorites!
Omg I love him 😍
Oscar is a cutie!
He’s so adorable 🥹🥹❤️
That is appallingly rude, I’m sorry it happened so last minute, it really sucks to be put in that position. People’s reactions to our collections are so varied. I once had an older man come to clean the carpets when I was moving years ago and he was so enamoured with my monster high dolls, it was really charming. Just because it’s different doesn’t make it weird and she was incredibly unprofessional, like keep it to yourself?? tell your friends?? I don’t understand the logic behind saying it to the person paying you to do a totally unrelated job. Zero manners :\ I know it’s easier said than done but try not to let it get to you, being so rude is a reflection on her, not you. I’m sure she’ll be totally fine with your cats, but when you get home you should definitely make a note in your review that her being inappropriate made you question her judgement/you would have found someone else because of it had time allowed. I hope you can still enjoy your trip, try not to stress too much! I’m sure it’s otherwise fine
Thanks so much, that’s a really kind and understanding comment. I’ve begun reaching out to some other sitters already to schedule some meet and greets when I’m home so in future I can have some people I LIKE aaand trust lined up for the cats. In the meantime, I agree with your sentiment that she’ll be fine with the cats 🫶 I need to somehow let it go. Understanding and kind comments like yours really help, so thank you 🙂
You are so welcome, I really hope you feel better about it all soon bc you sound like a lovely person and I hate to see a thoughtless comment set off this kind of anxiety. Sometimes a bit of reassurance can really help, we’ve all been there! and that sounds like a great plan, I’m sure next time won’t be anything like this one again but you’ve done literally everything you can for right now. You’re doing an awesome job for your little guys!
You've already received a lot of supportive comments, but I'll tag on by saying that my life got a lot easier when I stopped taking things personally. My MIL says she has "no filter" as a reason for blurting out things like your cat sitter did, but I firmly believe that we are responsible for the words that come out of our mouth. I also believe that humans are imperfect and sometimes we say shitty things. 🤷🏻♀️ You keep doing you, and enjoy your trip! Are you bringing a doll with you?
I had a window contractor stop dead as he entered the doll/craft area and let out a gasp of a tough guy not trying to scream. After a few seconds, he simply said, "You like dolls, huh?" I think he handled it pretty well. Some people just live in a different part of the Uncanny Valley, and that's ok. Being judgemental about others, however, is not.
I would be kinda livid that someone allowed themselves to be so unprofessional and share a personal opinion nobody's asked for. Generally I try to avoid people who make me that uncomfortable whenever I can. Maybe because I was lucky to have a friend who's an awesome adult woman with a very goofy side and once she told me "What was the reason to even grow up to deal with adult shit if you won't treat yourself with all the toys you can afford now?". She had very healthy aggressive reactions to people trying to fuck with her boundaries and I think I picked up a lot of that attitude from her. Hope you get next time a nice person and wish you an awesome trip!
Wow. That was embarrassing, for HER. WHO says that???
Definitely tell her after you fire her or after she finishes sitting that ypu found that comment extremely rude and unprofessional.
I absolutely will
Pay her fee, but don't recommend her. She's highly unprofessional. Your collection is awesome.
Wow that’s pretty uncalled for. I live in an apartment so I get maintenance coming through every quarter to inspect & they usually never say anything. One time I did have one guy who was like “wow you really like Bratz huh” and talked about his daughter liking them too but that was it lol
What kind of person walks into a potential client’s house and starts calling their things “weird”? This sitter is dumb AF. Makes you wonder how she stays in business if she habitually treats customers with contempt.
I would say "uh oh! That's an inside thought friend!" Fuck em. Unfortunately not everyone gets it.
It’s of little consolation at the moment, but I’ve learned to turn peoples shite behaviour back on them. In this scenario, I’d have said “Wow. That’s a very insensitive comment - especially considering you want a job from me. What made you feel comfortable enough to come into my home and say such a thing?” These days everybody is alleging to want to spare peoples feelings but I have found the opposite is true. Put them on the spot. She needs to learn a little something about manners.
I would be so jealous if i saw your collection, just remember its not for everyone and being different and weird is something we have to learn to embrace 💕
Same, if I saw someone's home office filled with their collection of ANYTHING, I'm gonna love it because I love seeing what people are passionate about and they're gonna get all animated and excited when I ask questions!! Also, totally agree about needing to *learn* to embrace our weirdness. It's a process. I consider myself a proud Weird, but I still have moments where I doubt myself and think "omg is [thing] *too* weird?" and my awesome friends will either say "it's not weird *enough*" or "oh yeah, that's super weird. I'm into that too, let's be weird about it together" 😂🧡
I know it’s hard to react in the moment. But being goth and getting name called in my teen years for it taught me some standard replies. Now as an adult my standard reply is : Thank you. It throws them off, if they call me weird and I say thank you. If they actually ask why I say thank you, I explain that I have zero intentions of being normal. Normal is just another word for average. Most great artists, entrepreneurs and scientists etc., have been called weird. I don’t see anything good in being average, so weird is perfect, thank you. And that’s truly how I see it. If the average adult can’t freely enjoy a harmless hobby that brings them joy and creativity, then I really don’t want to be the average adult. I mean why is she judging other people in their own home? Isn’t that kinda weird?
Very well said and excellent advice. Thank you!!
At this point in my life I just think it's funny and I'm not embarrassed or ashamed at all! Several years ago my then partner had a new friend come over. This is what he said when he saw my doll wall: "uhhh......it's nice that you support her hobbies." I still think about it and smile a little. He tried so hard to say something polite! Sorry the sitter said that to you, very unprofessional! Maybe you should let her know they do sometimes follow people home and haunt them. :P
My kids make fun of me for my dolls. For a Secret Santa gift, I asked for some doll furniture (I do dioramas in a 3x4 square shelf unit). My son-in-law mocked me when I sincerely thanked him. I just choose to act oblivious to their reactions. It's my hobby, and it makes me happy, so I don't care what they think!
I had my cousins and their kids come into the home that I shared with my Granny AFTER MY GRANNY’S FUNERAL and look around and criticize everything. You sleep in a twin bed? You’re an adult, that’s weird. You collect dolls? Really, Barbies AND Bratz and Star Wars figures? I’m a kid and I don’t collect those. Granny promised that painting can I have that? (I handed out one of Granny’s angels to each of them) I don’t like this angel can I have that (much more expensive) angel instead? The vultures left with their hands full, one of whom stole a cheap but pretty necklace of mine, and my heart was broken. I actually sold a lot of my collection a couple of years later, partly because of the recession but partly because I was ashamed and heartbroken. I lost a piece of myself back then (2005). Joining reddit a couple of years ago, and finding this sub and Barbie and Rainbow High and Monster High, helped me find myself and accept myself again. And I am collecting and happy and trying to rebuy favorite dolls that I lost in sadness. As of my cousins and their brats? Except for a few likes on their facebook posts, I have never seen or spoken to most of them again. I guess they wrote me off as too weird. I wrote them off as horrible people. They sound like they would get along with that cat sitter.
I agree with the general consensus: the sitter’s commentary was unprofessional and just.. super unnecessary. :/ I saw from other comments that you’ll secure the office as much as possible and (as someone else mentioned) not have to deal with her again after this - hooray! So my take on how to deal with this type of criticism in the future… I imagine people like this were made to believe they weren’t allowed to enjoy childhood pastimes beyond a certain age, and they project that onto other people. It’s definitely a them problem, but it still feels lousy to be judged. I try to focus on my own joy - that’s why we collect dolls and such, right? They make us happy! Usually this leads to me feeling pity for the critic, because they’re probably looking outside themselves for happiness instead of reconnecting with the small, simple joys they left behind. And if they’re being irritatingly, unrelentingly critical, and making it extra hard for me to be empathetic, it usually helps to mentally chant something to the tune of, “Poor baby,” in an exaggerated way until I find the whole scenario silly. Makes it easier for me to shrug it off and move on. :’) Hope this was at least a little bit helpful, lol. Enjoy your vacation!
I hide everything doll related before my in laws come… they’re very judgmental and I don’t want to deal with it. It’s a vulnerable part of me…
You can stick with this one for now if you're happy with how well she'll care for your pets, but next time get a new sitter, and don't be afraid to tell the old one that you thank her for her work this time, but you're not comfortable hiring her again in the future since her remarks about your doll collection didn't sit right with you and you expect more professional behavior than that.
Wow what a joyless awful person they are- I'm so sorry that happened to you. Also though- you've got a bf, kittens, two adorable babies, a passion that you're able to engage in fully and a lovely home in which to do so. And what passions and joy do they have? Clearly not a lot since their reaction to something unique and interesting was to deliberately try and make you feel bad about it. Feel sorry for them- if they had the pleasure of being really into a hobby or the freedom to display that passion in their living space, they'd never have reacted like that. Have the lovely holiday you deserve, leave them to their weird bitterness <3
Excellent analysis and response. Thats a great way to look at it. Thank you!
One way to think of it-- how boring for her to lack so much depth that she can only understand why someone would have stereotypical, conformist adult interests. Like she can't even politely grasp that the world offers an endless variety of harmless special interests that make people happy and that happiness is a good thing? Sounds like conformity and "being normal" was emotionally beat into her by others. Sounds sad and boring. Maybe she's the more conventional adult, but you're the liberated, creatively inspired, joyful one. You don't deserve to feel uncomfortable, so hire someone new the next time around. Sometimes I think about others' more mundane and expensive special interests / collections. If many dudes can shamelessly collect a large variety of super expensive firearms (which is the case where I live), we can shamelessly collect reasonably priced, joy-inspiring dolls.
well make sure you lock the room before you leave and do not give her a key. Also before you leave tell her they are all haunted.. :D seriously tho never hire this one again .. what a rude person.
“I’m an adult and I spend my adult money on whatever I want.”
If something like that happens again, be blunt. Tell her that her comment is rude and hurtful, and not something you should say to a potential employer. My grandma’s “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all” is still excellent advice that more people should take.
I enjoy it when people think that. Granted, I seek out the dolls that look creepy because that’s my niche. So I would have replied with some crazy eyes and been like “be sure to keep the door shut at night.” 😂😂😂 Not everyone will love what you love, but finding a way to laugh about it helps. 🖤
Ok...I mean I can understand if dolls freak them out for whatever reason, but at least be professional and not say anything or if they bug you that much politely apologize and say you can't take the job.
Very rude and, i have to say, strange comment to make about a literal stranger. Like shes here to catsit, what you do as a hobby is none of her bussines, unless its potentially harmful to her, which with dolls is obviously a ridiculous notion. So its her comment thats actually "wierd" here. I cant imagine going to someones home to apply for a job, that im going to be getting payed for, and make comments about their hobbies/home decore or anything of the sort. Absolutely ridiculous. She should keep her mouth shut and concentrate on the cats. But honestly theres nothing wrong with your hobby, people who get bothered by this are the wierdos actually or they are just boring people, who either dont have any hobbies of their own or they are the sort of people who only have socially acceptable hobbies, bc "what if people find me wierd for liking x/y/z?". Cant be me, lifes too short to be bothered by what other people think of me, im gonna live my best life and so should you! Enjoy your dolls and ignore the haters!
She’s completely disrespectful. I would not let her cat sit ever again. Knowing myself I would’ve said something back to her. Some of my sister in laws have said that my doll collecting is weird too. I completely changed the way I see them now. I didn’t get mad at them but I have a little resentment because they made fun of what I collect and what makes me happy. One of my other sister in laws is cool about what I collect. She collects a lot of Starbucks mugs 😆 so she’s a collector too.
She’s should have kept her mouth shut. She was there for a job. It’s disrespectful and a bad habit. She could loose out on jobs if she doesn’t learn to mind her own business. Her only concern should have been getting information on the cats and how to navigate in the place they live. Having dolls and a collection is common. Like I’ve commented before collecting dolls goes all the way back to the Victorian period. Her comment is nothing but a small blip in your life, treat it that way. After you come back from your trip plan to never hire her again.
incredibly unprofessional. doll collecting is a normal and common thing !
It's a reflection on their rigid view of what's normal, not a reflection on anything being wrong with you or your dolls. People who think dolls are "weird" in a bad way are usually very dull, boring people who have nothing in their lives besides copying and comparing themselves others. Intrinsic joy in a hobby isn't usually in their realm of capability, or else they'd find another person's interest fascinating or be curious about it, not judgmental (assuming it isn't hurting someone). It sounds like you don't have a choice to cancel her work this time, so the only best thing you can do is find another sitter for the future. Don't worry about her opinion. It truthfully in the grand scheme of existence is entirely immaterial.
Yeah I literally do house and pet sitting as my second job and establishing trust with a client as quickly as possible is a huge priority for me? Like I have petsat for some truly weird and disgusting homes because hey - I'm poor and need as many gigs as I can get - but I still gave them just as much effort and did just as good a job as I would my favorite clients, because my priority is to care for the animals and take off the stress of leaving a beloved pet with a stranger. Like wtf I'd never comment like that, super unprofessional behavior. And even if I felt unsafe in someone's home I'd still just politely decline. Definitely get a different sitter and interview as far in advance as you can!
I remind myself that my collection doesnt hurt anyone and ppl can judge all they want but lifes short and im having fun!
Idk where u live but I wish my clients have a doll room I could look at lol
❤️❤️❤️ I’m in London in the UK, so if you’re here and you’re a cat sitter then please DM 😄
I’m from Canada 😭 so far lol
Oh no that’s absolutely rude to do to a stranger who is letting you into their home for employment of all things. I don’t like that interaction at all and would leave a review of something like ”I understand my hobbies are niche and some may find them uneasy, however, the lack of professionalism and rude statements/ sentiments towards my displayed collection of *insert collection here* in the privacy of my own office struck me in a way that I will now be looking for a new sitter. I hope this sitter finds employment she’s more comfortable to be around.”
I would just ignore her. As you know MANY adults are collectors. She doesn’t know you personally so who cares. I bet your friends and family wouldn’t judge you, right? People will always have something to say whether you’re “too skinny”, “too fat”, a “bad driver” or collect Barbie’s. I wouldn’t pay her any mind.
Wow wtf
Ignore it! It is completely okay to like collecting dolls! Ps. Set up cameras around your house to make sure that she does not do anything weird with your dolls!
I would get a super freaky looking doll and give it prime placement on the shelf just to make her uncomfortable while she's over. 😆
My immediate response would have been, "I don't pay you for your opinions." Be rude right back.
I wish you had more time so you could find another sitter. I wouldn’t be pleased to have someone so judgmental in my home. I ignore people who judge my dolls or miniatures. In some folks minds, these things are only for children. And that’s fine, because it’s my hobby, not theirs
Oh boy, the minute she'd have uttered that, she'd have been out on the street with a "Don't call us...we'll call you..." for her trouble. lol
I hope the cats bite her 😈😌 (Honestly though, that's awful, and sounds extra stressful because of the fact you had to work with her given the short notice. I hope it doesn't get you too down - I know a lot of us are fighting internalised shame or healing childhood trauma through our dolls, so in my experience it doesn't take a lot to feel ashamed or anxious about our collections. PS can we see your dioramas when you get back??)
It’s a doll thang, she’d never understand.
If you enjoy your hobby and it’s not hurting anyone, you don’t need to care what ANYONE else thinks.
[удалено]
She’s doing it because she loves animals, she has a full time job too. But you’re totally right, I’ll feed that back to her when I return.
Youd catch me hiding them in every corner of the house 🤭🤭 i love malicious compliance, you thought the shelf was creepy? Ohhh you just wait, ill show ya creepy! Jokes aside, im sad you have to deal with that, dont be scared to make a review related to the subject. Youre welcoming someone into your home, and if this girl wants to do this often and get good reviews she needs to learn to keep her mouth shut, at least until the homeowner leaves. You dont need to mention the collection, just say something along the lines of "did her job properly but made unnecessary and unprofessional comments about my home space" because its genuinely a bad look on her part and she needs to be made aware of it.
Wow rude...
That was really unprofessional and unkind of her. Just remember that your collection brings YOU joy and that's what matters! As a sidenote, don't worry about your cats, just because someone is rude doesn't mean they're going to neglect or abuse animals. (I also don't get the comments saying you should lock up your doll collection . . . Like, the sitter has no interest in them, why would she touch them . . . I would be more worried if they were an avid doll collector, then they might be tempted to take something, ha ha.) Have a great vacation!
Thank you. My boyfriend and I have now managed to lock that room which is helpful as the cats shouldn’t be in there knocking over my dioramas anyway and gives us a safe space to store any valuables! I agree with your sentiment, the lady was clearly passionate about animals and my cats took to her immediately. She also has good reviews from many others so I’m not concerned about leaving them in her care. Ive already lined up another sitter to meet when I’m back, so hopefully after a few meet-and-greets I’ll find someone who I feel more comfortable with 😊
The good thing is that you can choose another sitter, she'll learn to watch her tongue next time
Don’t book her again after this.
I would hope this was just a careless, extremely rude comment. I would also never hire this person again if I had to go with them. If I could leave a review, I would cite this as an example. People watching your family - pets or people - should not be causing you anxiety or making derogatory comments on your home. That's just sort of customer service basics. Other people suggested cameras and I think that's a good idea for some peace of mind. Maybe you can ask a friend to check in or do you have neighbors who could pop in? Hope all goes well on your trip!
I'm so sorry that happened to you, she was very rude and unprofessional. I collect dolls myself and have run into similar situations. I'd make sure some kind of camera is set up in your home. I'd personally have issues trusting a random rude person like that. Don't ever take her rudeness to heart! Collect and enjoy your hobby to your heart's content!
As a boy with a mother who was very embarrassed about me having dolls, she would make me feel ashamed for having them. I would have to keep them hidden in my closet in a garbage bag. I hated anytime I wanted to play with my doll house I would have to pull it out and set it all up. But what was worse, when I was done playing and had to disassemble the dollhouse and shove everything back in the garbage bag and hide it in the back of my closet. Growing up forcing to feel ashamed it continued into adulthood. I no longer played with them but kept collecting however I kept it secret only showing those I trust.
She sounds lame. Just so you know, it’s not weird to have a harmless & wholesome collection of trinkets that make you happy. This includes dolls. I think you’re cool as hell. Fire her!
I know the feeling, I had a close friend say to me that my dolls are weird and creepy… like bruh, did I ask? 😭 People are so rude for no reason
That sitter sounds like a rude person hope u can trust her with the cats though.
I honestly don't care what people think of my decor. If they don't like it, they can leave, it's for me not them.
I wouldn’t let her back into my house. Board the cats
I'm sorry that happened to you. If you happen to be in Ohio I am a pet sitter and collector for future reference (:
You may have gotten her thinking about it, though. Maybe she never thought about being able to collect dolls as an adult. No matter what her random thought was, this will stick with her, and she might look at dolls differently. Just. Maybe.
I'm not gonna lie, I try to be more resilient when it comes to comments on things I enjoy, but my body tends to go into "freak out and hide everything you care about" mode when new people are introduced to my collection. I've had friends who have never been in my room, and when I get ready for them to come, I hide all my dolls in containers, even if it means there will be empty shelves on my walls. But at this point, I feel like it doesn't matter what people say about me or my interests
That’s awful :( Also super disrespectful to someone you’re about to work for. I’m dog sitting right now actually! Remember a lot of people find doll collecting to be really cool and many people do it too!
That's so rude... Imagine the situation where she is applying for a job... Or it is a camouflage. She says you are weird and then play with yours doll while you are gone!
😂 oh man.. I’ve locked the door to the office now with all the dolls in there, so we’ll never know!
That's probably for the best! No dolls for someone so rude!
It's NOT weird and this person is rude beyond belief. She basically showed up to a job interview and insulted her potential boss to their face. If she advertises or is listed somewhere you can leave a review, I would definitely leave one after you get back. Enjoy your trip and ignore the dumb remarks that were made by someone who clearly isn't any fun.
I would say it is super weird for you to come into my house and then criticize it (especially when you are paying them like where is the tact?) She is definitely the one who should be embarrassed. Hope the comments are making you feel a bit better about the situation.
Remember that her judgement about your hobby is not important. Your hobby brings you joy, and it hurts no one. There's absolutely nothing wrong with it. She'd probably be more comfortable if your hobby was drinking heavily and committing adultery, just because it was more familiar to her. But this is just someone with a closed mind. Also remember that people face this kind of criticism and censure for things in their life far more integral to them than hobbies. Think of the harsh judgement LGBTQIA+ people experience for existing, for getting married, for adopting kids. Think about the judgement single moms experience for using welfare/SNAP benefits. Think about the judgement interracial couples experience for loving someone with a different colored skin. Understand that close minded people will judge others harshly. But they literally do not matter. Their opinions do not matter. Do not try to shape your life to meet the approval of someone who judges others happiness harshly. They're probably miserable, and trying to bring everyone else down to their level. Furthermore, you're not trying too impress your cat sitter with your hobby, anyways. So what she thinks is irrelevant. And, yes, lock the office door, because she's going to be snooping around in there.
I do actually think a lockable door is a fantastic idea, if it's possible. Even a hasp 'n' staple with a padlock hurriedly screwed to the door and frame would suffice. A doll collection is an investment of money and time. OP, your craft area is your happy place and should be wholly unavailable to people who don't respect that. It would also stop the kittens from some extra hidey holes :). That's an opinion, not a command, lol. There are, as you say CertEcon, abundant reasons for others to judge another person. Judges gonna judge. Being on the receiving end generally feels personal, that they're pointing out something "allegedly" broken about you. I'm not surprised you're unsettled, OP, it's an added kick that the judge will be in charge of the very thing they're criticising as well as your young family members :(. Locking a door protects your stuff, it's harder to guard your heart from fear. So I pray peace & confidence for you while you're away and I'm sure everyone here adds to that with their prayers, positive vibes and well wishes for you too :). Fretteth notteth!
I do my best to ignore them. These are things I like, they make me happy so what other people say shouldn’t matter. know there isn’t enough time for a new sitter, but after this time, don’t hire them again. I would also recommend some security for that room as a just in case so something doesn’t “accidentally” happen to anything in that room
In my opinion, people who judge or shame certain things are actually doing it because they have a repressed desire for wanting to do that thing as well, they hate seeing people doing what they themselves would like doing so they belittle or shame the object of their desire. I speak from personal experience because I am one of those people. The other reason why people think something you do is weird is also because they don't understand it because they've never seen it. Finding something “weird” is a common reaction to novelty, don't take it personally. These people a lot of times become intrigued by your activity and want to find out more about it. I speak from personal experience because this was my initial reaction to a doll collector (although I never voiced it like the cat sitter) but I quickly did my research and I ended up becoming a doll fan myself.
I was a sitter for about 4 years, and I would NEVER say this to a client, even if I thought it. I sat for a couple whose entire downstairs was covered in clowns and other "horror" type items, and guess what? I never mentioned it. Despite the fact I'm horribly afraid of clowns. Get a different sitter. What they said to you was wildly unprofessional. I can't even believe it.
I’m not sure if someone else has said this but I think it’s pretty important to mention this interaction in the review you give her. It’s a very intimate, vulnerable thing, inviting someone into your living space, and it was entirely unprofessional that she didn’t respect that.
Not only is it unprofessional but it is incredibly rude. I understand that you need to hire her because of the short notice and her prior experience cat sitting but I would not invite her back into your home after this trip. I agree with other commenters saying to close the door, set up a nanny cam, and invest in a locking knob. If you aren't able to or are unwilling to change out the knob on the rental property then I'd absolutely get a cam that alerts you to motion and keeping the door closed. With how unprofessional her initial interaction with you was I wouldn't put it past her to go in there, snoop, take pictures, or be careful/respectful of your collection. I'd make it clear that the office is off limits. I would hate for any of your dolls to get misplaced or damaged and I'd especially hate for her to take pictures and mock your collection online or among her friends. I don't know if she'd actually go that far but she's already openly mocked you to your face on your first meeting as her potential employer so I wouldn't put it past her.
If it’s a possibility I would lock the door to that room. I know your cat might be more comfortable to wander into all rooms of the house but I would do that personally just to be safe haha.
She’s a cat sitter for a living… isn’t that weird
Extremely rude and unprofessional. Most non-collectors who come to my house tend to admire my collections.
New sitter 100%
It's not her fault she's boring. I'd get a new sitter after that. She's very rude...
Obviously it’s too late for a comeback, but I would pull an uno reverse card and make it seem like it’s weird that she asked, if it ever comes up again. Look confused and respond, “Doesn’t everyone do something that makes them happy? I thought that was the norm.”