I'm always honest with folks like this. "I cannot in good conscience throw the clothes away. But I will put all dirty clothing back in his cubby bagged up, for you to take and do with what you please." And if she dumps it in the garbage can at your workplace, I would reclaim, rewash, and donate. Seriously, fuck people like that. She's doing it for show. Good for her, clap clap, yawn, move on. I tell parents their options, but I will not restrict access to art and sensory materials and I'm very blunt about that too. "You may bring him in playclothes. You may send in a few outfits that you deem to be playclothes, and I'm happy to help him change when he gets here and before he leaves, as long as he has that available in his cubby. We have smocks available and I will make sure that he wears one. What option would you like to choose?"
I find when you don't really react much to it or coddle it, they'll also stop prancing in front of you. Nothing kills that like boredom on your part. But you must be careful to never give an inch to this type of parent. We don't launder the kids clothing at work, and I especially would not offer to do so for anyone who says something as dumb as that. But it wouldn't be tolerated that she send her child sauced with cologne either--lots of kids and adults are sensitive to it. So I think despite my school being frankly super expensive and full of families that could behave like that, you don't see it that often.
unfortunately my director is perfectly fine with her doing this and tells us it’s not our problem to worry about where the clothes are going. he also said that we should do our best to keep him away from messy activities and instead set out something else for him or avoid messy activities entirely on the days he is here. he is a huge ass kisser and doesn’t want to lose this woman’s business (she has three kids enrolled and pays 30k a year in nursery fees)
How exactly do you prove its been thrown out? A photo of it in the bin?
Just take the photo and then take them out, wash them and claim innocence if she sees someone wearing it as a spare later. "Oh that top? Oh no, they were donated by a different parent. Yours was thrown out, remember? You have the photo to prove it!"
Put a couple of banana skins and some old veggies from lunch on top of it, then take a picture of it in the bin, then fish it out and wash it really really good, then donate it or keep it for playclothes. This woman has mental problems.
Absolutely. It's also not indicative of *"rich people"*. We grew up very wealthy - wealthier than most. My mom would go through my closet often and donate anything I didn't wear. She would often do the same with the toys from my playroom. My parents were/are generous to a fault and got taken advantage of quite a few times, but that's beside the point. This woman is just a nut job.
Yeah, her behavior screams “this is what I think rich people do” when in fact most really wealthy people are pretty prudent with their money. This woman has issues and seems quite mean.
Say no. It is not appropriate to tedirect staff time.to take pics of garbage. Report the center to licensing for.diverting care staff for this drama. Say you are another parent when you call
I cannot believe your director is okay with this. It’s completely unacceptable. This poor child is in your care and he’s really okay with you withholding “messy” activities??? Thats like the majority of the things i do with my 3 year olds AND it’s their favorite activities. That’s just not okay at all.
I have been known to just throw out a beyond saving pair of toddler underwear if there is a one off significant poop situation. But I just can't imagine throwing out a perfectly good set of clothes just because they have pee/paint/applesauce on them. This situation is INCREDIBLY bizarre.
The center my kids go to do the same. I made sure to tell younger son’s teacher to not worry out throwing anything away as we had soooooo many 2T underwear from older brother and no more siblings to follow.
Oh I agree it's not anyone's problem to worry about where the clothes are going. But there are certain things that I just won't be party to, personally. If she flings them out the car window on the drive home it's not sweat off my back even. But I won't be party to denying a child sensory or art experiences unless it's necessary because of aversion or the like on the child's part. Once you start doing stuff like that for one family it can snowball.
Absolutely. In 5 years, these will be the parents who want to control which books are in the school library because they don't want THEIR kid to read them. Rather than take it up with their kid, they want to control the whole school.
Also? If this kind of parent wants to control which books their child has access to and which kinds of activities their child does? They should pull their child from daycare and hire a nanny. Very easy.
I would have words with my director if they accepted this kind of situation. Seriously I’d have a serious talk with him and if he still won’t budge, report them. This is not ok.
That makes no sense. Don’t pretty much all centers have a waitlist a mile long? Who cares if she takes her $30K away? There are other families waiting to pay up!
yes but my setting is in a LCOL area so a lot of the children on the waiting list are paid for by the government which give less money than a paying parent does
Most infant care is $2500 per kid per month where I am. Is she getting a huge discount for three kids for that much? It would be a much better deal for the director to get three families in paying the full rate!
no, i’m just in england in a very poor area. parents who pay are very rare and majority of children are funded by the government. when my director gets a paying parent he holds onto them
her three children also only attend part time but she wants to get them in full time, upping fees to 75k. in some ways i can’t even blame my director for catering to this woman
I think that’s because this woman is insane. I don’t even know where to start. I agree with you though, OP needs to be boring about it and the problem will resolve.
We also have professional directors who don't bow down to unreasonable/inappropriate parental demands! Makes a big difference. :) I mean, I have run into that mentality before. I can't say I give much thought to what people do in their private lives/home lives, but if they're trying to isolate their child in my classroom or dictate the enrichment and curriculum I do in my classroom because of their own hangups and not a pressing need or aversion of the child, then that's going to be a hard pass from me. I've not yet had a director who will cross that line with me!
Check if textiles can be thrown out. Several states have passed laws about textiles and landfills- I keep getting into arguments with my coworker over this. There are bins that take everything you’re just a lazy POS that won’t go the extra step to dump left behind textiles.
During Summer camp last year we had quiet reading time during the centers naptime and we allowed the after school kids to either bring their own books to read for half an hour or borrow some from our personal library. One kid got jealous because his friends were bringing in books that looked cooler than ours so his mom came in and told us it wasn't fair and we needed to tell kids they couldn't bring their own books anymore.
Like hell I'm gonna tell a kid not to read.
I had one livid at me and told my boss I tried to kill her child because I let him decorate a gingerbread cookie (not eat! Just decorate) and he had “life threatening allergies” yet she never could produce any documentation stating there were any allergies. That was a Friday. She emailed us the next week and told us he wouldn’t be returning due to some disease he suddenly got that made it so he could no longer walk. That was almost 10 years ago and I still pray for that little boy daily. I have no doubt mom had Munchhausen by proxy.
I also had one ask when I’d be teaching them about the prime minister and their job responsibilities. I teach four and five year olds… in America!
My favorite though… “you’re a great teacher but you’ll be an amazing one once you become a mom because then you’ll ’get it.’” I guess I’ll never be an amazing teacher since cancer left me infertile. I’m stuck being just a great one. 🙃
You're an amazing teacher, fuck that lady. Anyone can get knocked up and pop out a kid, and a good majority of these parents are horrible. Yet somehow they think that having a kid makes them more educated than people who went to school for the job and work with children all day long. They're not bright.
I had a parent tell us their child had allergies to several foods. But that they changed weekly (yes the parent said that when we asked for a doctor’s note). We documented what reactions the kid had when exposed (not ingested). She said we didn’t know what we were talking about because he didn’t have any allergies. The week before the kid did. Mom was so mad at us when asked for documentation, she yelled at us, stormed out & tried to slam the front door, but couldn’t due to the slow close door mechanism.
I asked if she wanted to pay for it. Luckily my director heard the whole thing as she was down the hall so when the parent told her what happened my director was like “so are you gonna pay for it or not??”.
The mom doesn’t do pickup or drop off anymore and the dad still apologizes for his wife’s behavior, and every time I tell him, her actions are not your responsibility, I understand you feel bad but it’s okay.
This. Say that you are not allowed to throw away the clothes. That it has to be the parents decision to throw them away.
How awful that she is not allowing her child to be messy and have fun, and that she is creating such waste!
All I’m thinking about is that she wants proof the clothing didn’t get washed and put in the spare clothes bin. WHAT DO YOU CARE YOU WERE GOING TO THEOW IT AWAY.
Exactly. Her clothing isn't exclusive if "the poors" wear them. Makes me wonder why her children are in a daycare in a LCOL area, and not an exclusive one.
Lol in that case I’d hand them to your supervisor! Let’s see if they can throw perfectly good clothes away … or put them in the hands of the janitor and say loudly “ I’m throwing these perfectly good size “x” clothes away wink wink”
Speaking of “wink wink” I was the director of a church daycare. My supervisor and I took a sharpie marker out to the dumpster and wrote “charity” on it. If anyone wanted to know where something was (old worn out / unsafe toy etc) we would say, “We donated it to charity.”
OK. We might have made Jesus sad.
This case is different. SO you could get a duffle bag and write “trash” on it. Tell her you put the clothes in the trash…and then give it to someone who has some sense.
It's totally not about the kid or the clothes. I'm wondering if she is a compulsive shopper or buys them at discount outlets like Ross or TJMax. It's all about mom's issues with control and power dynamics.
Was hoping to see a comment like this. I'm not a daycare teacher, I joined this sub mistakenly thinking it was for parents who want advice about sending their kids to daycare and then ended up staying because it's interesting to read from the daycare teacher's POV. But I'm a parent with 2 kids and I am diagnosed with BPD. I think the parent throwing the kids clothes away is nonsense, I think it's even sadder that they're not allowed to go into daycare spare clothes if she doesn't want them as it shows selfishness not just rich obliviousness, if she doesn't want them then donating them is much more ethical than just throwing them away. People shouldn't be diagnosing BPD online and nor should it be a catch all for bad behaviour. People with mental illness can be unreasonable people just like everyone with or without mental illness can learn what is right and reasonable. Same as parents with and without mental illness can be reasonable or unreasonable, good parents or bad.
I have bpd and I don’t find it stigmatizing. I understand that untreated people may exhibit maladaptive behaviors and that it doesn’t mean that it’s all people with bpd. However, I do think the mom kind of sounds more like a narcissist than anything but we aren’t psychologists so we shouldn’t try to diagnose. We’re just hypothesizing.
Gotcha, since I don’t know the kid, never met the Op, my reference was not a nickname and just “metaphorical”. . . hoping OP is sensible and gets it’s meant to “insert child’s name here.”
Had a 8m come in with a "rash" all over his body and the baby was unvac and had a fever. Called parent she said was soap . We told her had fever and going up and she came was very mad. Guess what is was measles! Thank goodness I had one other baby that day. I cleaned after we sent the other home just as a precaution bc that baby was four months.
That is so wasteful and bad for the environment. At the bare minimum, she should donate it!! Also, fragrance is so bad for a baby's sensitive skin. Her values are clearly all messed up. I definitely would tell that parent that she can dispose of her clothes anyway she wants on her own time and just stick it in a bag for her to take.
Honestly, put in trash, take pic, wash. Then offer them up on a local buy nothing page. Guarantee she is not on that. I could not throw away brand new clothes knowing there are so many kids that those clothes would be a blessing to. And I would totally go through this lady's trash on trash day. Anything on the curb is fair game! You know she is throwing away 7 of her brand new outfits a week. OP could probably make more reselling this lady's garbage than she does at her job
The fragrances can cause asthma, and baby clothes literally says it should be washed before being worn because of chemicals used to make it flame resistant. This mom is just mental.
Whenever a child comes in and the parents don't want them dirty, I immediately change them into spares for the day, then change them back before collection.
If they ask about photos, I just list all the messy things we did- and let's be honest, its almost all messy play. Grass stains, mud, sand, playdoh, paint, dirt, glue, food stains, water play, slime... and you simply didn't want poor little Johnny missing out on all that fun.
After about a week, they usually get it and stop sending them in fancy clothes. Though we do have one mother who insists on sending her 1.5yo in $200 sneakers. We just take them off immediately and put them in his bag, he goes barefoot for the whole day.
yeah we tried this, she saw some pictures posted in the spares and had a FIT. she didn’t want her child wearing ‘some dirty clothes worn by who knows what’ even after we explained that they were washed after every use
Isn’t against licensing for a toddler to go barefoot? Where I am they are required to wear shoes at all times. I had a mom get mad that we lost one of her son’s shoes because they were expensive but I just don’t understand people who buy expensive things for a toddler. They are inevitably gonna lose it, get messy, grow out of it etc. I mean you don’t have to dress your kid in rags but come on.😩
My rule for shoes and children is “if i need to get you a new pair in 6 months or less your getting the walmart ones that are tied together on a string.”
I had a mom send her kid with a diamond bracelet for show and tell. She told me it was real and not to lose it. I told her we can't have it at school and she set it down and walked away. This was 20 years ago and I still remember being shocked.
I think the most disgusting thing about this is not willing to donate. I’ve NEVER met a parent not willing to donate old clothes. Children don’t choose to be poor. Every child deserves weather appropriate clothes in good condition
To be so heartless as to throw out perfectly good clothes is just disgusting. I’ve worked with some rich clientele but all of these rich families I work for would agree that throwing away clothes when so many children go without is extremely unethical
At the height of COVID, our illness policy was pretty strict when it came to any COVID-like symptoms (fever, body aches, and, of course, coughing were all treated as exclusionary symptoms that could only come back to the center with a negative COVID test). One day, a 3 year old child came in the morning sucking on what was obviously a cough drop and his dad looked me dead in the eyes and told me “oh he loves those—he eats them regularly like they’re candy.” I had to fight the massive urge to ask him if he thought I was a moron. It came as a shock to nobody when we sent the kid home with a cough and fever a few hours later (presumably after the medicine he told us his parents had given him before school wore off—which was also prohibited in our illness policy).
Later when this same family tested positive for COVID they tried to talk the mandatory 5-day exclusion down to 36 hours. Thank god my director at the time told them to bffr
I don't wear my wedding rings at work for a number of reasons (handwashing, don't want to lose them, don't want to scratch the kids, etc). I had a dad accuse me of giving the wrong impression because I don't wear my rings. Um, I'm here to work, not look for anything else.
Lol I had a parent ask me I allowed the 3 and 4 year olds in my class to choose their pronouns? (She was conservative and against it) Like ma'am, they don't even know what pronouns are? It truly was the weirdest interaction lol
I had someone ask me that too, except I’m in an infant classroom. I remember just blankly staring at them because this had to be a joke, right? Infants are barely aware of their own existence what do you mean pronouns????
Bc let me show you how quickly you’ll change your mind when you have to buy him an entirely new wardrobe every month lmfao I will clear this mf closet OUT you hear me?? And “throw it away” in my back seat lol
Talking about “clothes look ugly after you wash them”. Unless you wash them in a puddle, they should be fine. Maybe invest in some Woolite and Shout instead of more expensive toddler clothes 🙄
And I call bullshit anyway bc if you throw the clothes away when they get dirty, then he should be able to get them as dirty he likes. She knows no one is going throw designer clothes away, they’ll just keep him away from the paint, dirt, spaghetti sauce etc
Sounds like a woman living rent free off her sugar daddy bc anyone who makes their own money wouldn’t have this mentality. Even billionaires don’t do shit like this. She’s in la la land I’d milk it for all it’s worth lmao
Why does it matter if his clothes get dirty if she’s just going to throw them away when he takes them off anyways?
I would have this boy finger painting every damn day.
i have some parents who live by the the fact that if their child is messy it means they had fun and therefore have clothes that are specifically for nursery. then i have this mum
We had a pink eye outbreak in a home daycare I was working at. The mom of patient zero brought her child back before it was cured and she also apparently didn't get her child the antibiotics meaning all the babies got it.
I mentioned to the mom how it had spread and she said, "I just put some breastmilk on Leo's and it clearing it right up! Why don't you rub some into everyone else's eyes since I have the antibody?" Sorry but we can't rub your breastmilk into another baby's eye?
They were concerned their 5-year-old was getting addicted to Minecraft to the point where it was affecting his moods and general disposition. Turns out he is playing Mincraft for about 4 hours a day.
A parent picked up while we were in line to go outside to play. She flipped on me because now she would have to deal with a tantrum. We went outside at the same time every day, she just came early. It’s my fault she was early I guess lol.
Had a student once that had new clothes every single day. Turns out mom was depressed and a hoarder. She bought new clothes because she didn’t have the energy to wash them and they just became part of the hoard.
I have a 2nd grader who can’t read. Like, he struggles to sound out CVC words. He was placed in an online intervention program to help him bridge his gaps.
When he didn’t do the minutes and mom was asked why, she said “it was too hard for him so i just didn’t make him do it”.
MA’AM WHAT?!??
Similar but not quite as extreme. Mom asked that her daughters clothes not get dirty (like girl your daughter is 14 months old, she's gonna get dirty). So we started taking her clothes off for anything that could potentially get messy. All meals, all crafts, all sensory table activities, etc. then mom picked up early one day when we were doing snack and her kid was just in a diaper. Mom threw a fit that her daughter had no clothes on even though none of the babies did cause we always remove their clothes for messy meals and activities. Then we started putting a grubby T-shirt over the kids clothes and mom said not to do that because she looks "trashy" in a paint shirt like that. We literally could not win with this woman
There was a mom who told us to never make funny faces at her daughter, because the daughter might throw up. She also expected us to give her Tylenol every 4-6 hours every single day. Our team lead refused, saying it made her uncomfortable to be giving so much medication without being a clear need for it. She got written up for it.
This lady was crazy. She came up with so many different disorders/diseases that her youngest daughter had in the few months she was in my class. After spending 40+ hours a week for 10 months, I was convinced the only thing wrong was reflux, but that’s not uncommon with young babies. She said her daughter had everything from GERD to fibromyalgia to cystic fibrosis. No exaggerations either. It was alarming. One of my coworkers babysat for them once, and said there were buckets for vomit everywhere, and Tylenol all over the place. Very unsettling and alarming.
Same lady accused us of having black mold in the basement, because she could “feel it in her teeth” while stomping on the floor. We don’t have a basement lol.
I’d start washing them myself and selling them on fb marketplace…also please tell me what brand of jeans you have that have lasted you that long? I feel like with all my walking and squatting I kill a pair of jeans in a year.
In my experience, regular jeans (I wear Levi's) without any stretch last longer than the stretchy ones (most women's jeans these days, which is why i buy men's jeans or steal my husband's). Stretchy ones wear out easier, especially the knees and butt. Also, if they aren't tight fitting, they last longer.
The other issue is washing. Don't wash them too often. Only if they are visibly dirty or smelly. I can wear them a few times before washing, and then only in cold water. I have some over 5 years old that are fine.
Although, if you're squatting a lot, you'll blow the knees out fast.
I had a parent accuse me of yanking her child out of her hand when I just gentle took his hand to his seat on the carpet and then ask my co director who I was ..the child is not in my class but I help out in the morning with her class and have been at my center for almost two years and have had multiple interactions with this parent
I cannot stop thinking about that poor boy just sitting there marinating and all of those atrocious fire retardant chemicals every day all day. largely unregulated, constant barrage of chemicals and unsanitary people touching the clothes in the store horrible for the kid
It wasn’t in my class when it happened but it was one of my former children’s parent. It was the older toddler class so biting was an issue, but parents in general get really tender about biting (which is fine mostly). This parent was incensed bc their child was getting bitten by the same kid, even though they worked with children and understood child development. They very casually told the teachers that they considered putting CAYENNE PEPPER in their child’s sunscreen to hurt the biter next time he bit. It was such a cookoo bananas response I lost respect for them when I heard about it from the teachers.
Lol I'm not an ece professional and this just popped up on my feed but I used to work with a rich kid from the mid east who I caught throwing used plates and cutlery away in the trash. They didn't belong to him, they were work property. I asked him why and he said he was embarrassed about having dirty dishes and didn't know what to do. 🫠He said leaving it in the sink was like not flushing the toilet.
I don’t know what diarrhea is because I don’t have children. Put the parent in their place by adding all of the diapers I’ve done in my professional life (estimate). That parent stopped talking & walked away.
Told by a parent how to wipe a nose.
There’s so many more…
Oh f*ck this noise.
“He will be getting dirty as part of our program, I will NOT be changing his clothing if they’re not wet or highly soiled, and I will not be throwing perfectly good clothing in the trash. You are welcome to take the dirty clothes home with you and do as you wish, but if they are left here unclaimed, I will be washing and keeping them as spares.”
And I’m pretty comfortable not doing something stupid that will make my job harder, even if my director told me to. I would not find him other stuff to do, I would not take unnecessary photos of his clothing, none of that. That’s rude to you.
I had a parent tell me that her child (4 years old) plays with sharp knifes so she had to hide all of them up high. He does a lot of other things at home so their house is apparently “extremely baby proofed”. I asked the child why he plays with knifes and he said “idk” and giggled.
I regularly remind the child to not play with knifes at home and to listen to his mom, dad, and grandparents.
His mom use to pick him up early, but hasn’t in over a year because “he drives us crazy” lol.
I had a parent that sent their child in an entirely white snowsuit, white hat and white mittens, and demanded it was to he kept spotless. Our yard is mostly sand. Even with the snow on top, everyone gets dirty.
So I work with kindergarten kids in a before and after school program at an elementary school in Canada. A couple weeks ago, a dad came to sign out his child, which was fine. When he was signing out his child, he was trying to make conversation and decided to tell me, “I had to make sure I cut the grass at home before I came to pick up the kids. I’m getting a vasectomy tomorrow.”
that is actually one of the most unhinged things I’ve heard? And I’ve heard a LOT of bullshit lol.
Off the top of my head is the parent who won’t let her child eat cupcakes in the classroom unless we take the frosting off because of “sugar” (it isn’t even the dye like it is for a lot of crunchy parents!). Another parent wouldn’t let his child have a singular mini marshmallow because it has “too much sugar.”
This was from one of my coworkers, who has a child in my classroom, but she got very upset at I and the other teachers in the classroom for taking her kid outside because he sometimes would chew on the wood chips on the playground (all the kids do this, but we tell them not to/stop them when they do, but sometimes they just do it anyways unfortunately.) Same parent also takes her kid out of the classroom I work in during naptime to the classroom she works in, putting them out of ratio 😬 (as it’s based on the youngest kid in the classroom, the room she works in the ratio is 1:10, the ratio for my classroom is 1:4, and she’s one of three teachers down there.)
This is an environmental nightmare and also this poor kid must have a massive pesticide exposure from wearing not washed clothes. I need more details about this mom. What kind of work does she do? Is she a stupid teen? This is absolutely disgraceful and really quite the burden to put on a little guy. She sounds like she desperately needs a parenting class.
she apparently worked in a nursery setting before but now she’s a SAHM living off her huge inheritance and rich baby daddy. she’s a middle aged woman and genuinely one of the rudest people i ever met. i dread talking to her because she doesn’t treat you like a person, more like some dirt below her. i remember once i complimented her diamond bracelet and she showed me what website she got it off. i tried to explain that i couldn’t afford it and she was SO shocked that most people can’t afford to spend 10k on a bracelet😭
A stupid teen that's absolutely disgusting. I get that teen mothers are looked down on but it's 2024 stop being so judgemental this isn't the 80s and 90s anymore sweetheart.
Wait, she thinks clothes are ugly after they’ve been washed…once?
So she doesn’t wash her kids clothes and puts them on him straight from the store? That grosses me out! Clothing can be treated with chemicals and exposed to all kinds of stuff 😖
We have always basically told the parents tough shit when they ask up to keep their clothes from getting dirty. “It would be developmentally inappropriate and unfair to your child to exclude them from activities to prevent their clothing from becoming dirty. If you do t not feel comfortable with the clothes they are wearing today, you are welcome to drop by a different set of clothes before choice time and we will change them into those clothes.”
We have a baby who just turned one in our class. We were warned about the mother, who leaves her daughter until exactly closing time
1. Demands pictures, we are required to send 2 a day. We have a class of 12 one year olds, so you can imagine it's hard to get quality pictures of everyone. We also don't have time to out it in unless it's nap time, however sometimes there's other things to do.
All day she constantly demands photos no matter how many times we tell her we do what we can.
2. Her clothes CANNOT get dirty. Not even a spot, or she will call the director. She's 1, and she eats like a crazy person and gets food everywhere. And she sends her in WHITE ONSIES all the time
3. The balm, it's a special stick of balm that she insists we put on after every diaper change. First it's unsanitary as you can't clean it so it just has poop particles.....the other day I ACCIDENTALLY didn't press the applied cream for a diaper change and she immediately called and freaked out. On all the baby's wipes has "please put the glo stick after everychange". Every. Single. Pack.
Ma'am, if you want personalized care then HIRE A NANNY. we have 12 kids, all 1, all having needs. We take care of your daughter but God damn give us a break
Ok that stick thing is disgusting and a heath hazard, that shouldn’t be allowed.
Your director needs to stand up to this tyrant. I’d make sure the kids clothes got as messy as she wanted them, as long as she was having fun/learning new skills. What’s she gonna call the director about? “My child was caught having fun today!”
I’ve had asimilar situation to this, expect the parent wouldn’t throw the clothes away or refuse to wash them and she wasn’t fine with her daughter getting dirty. She definitely was washing and reusing outfits. Mom would get very very upset when the little girl would get dirty because she didn’t want her clothes to be stained. So we would change her into spare clothes after she was dropped off and then put her clothes back on her right before pickup.
I have been considering becoming a daycare/preschool teacher at some point, and this is making me reconsider. It must be too sad to see sweet kids with shitty home lives.
I would be taking those clothes out of the trash after the photos if it was me, hahaha.
There was once a mother who took her child out of the daycare because she claimed there was not enough "academic" learning happening for her 13 month old baby. Did she want us to teach him algebra?
The other wildest thing was being told "no" when we told a mom that she should stop feeding her child so much dairy because he was clearly lactose intolerant by the state of his diapers. Every day he would be sent with cheese puffs, yogurt, string cheese etc. She also said no when we suggested she buy the boy shoes that didn't have holes in them. I wonder about that boy and his siblings sometimes. Their parents always seemed to do only the very bare minimum.
She doesn’t wash her kid’s clothes before they wear them? I have had a friend get a staph infection from wearing clothes directly from the store. It’s actually really important to wash your kids clothes before they wear them.
I work in a low income neighborhood. I bring my son’s old clothes because parents don’t even put a change of clothes. They never return the clothes so I see the kids wearing them again and again (which I absolutely don’t mind and actually find funny). I have a boy in the classroom who wears his big sister’s clothes. It’s like we both live in opposite world. 💀
I'm always honest with folks like this. "I cannot in good conscience throw the clothes away. But I will put all dirty clothing back in his cubby bagged up, for you to take and do with what you please." And if she dumps it in the garbage can at your workplace, I would reclaim, rewash, and donate. Seriously, fuck people like that. She's doing it for show. Good for her, clap clap, yawn, move on. I tell parents their options, but I will not restrict access to art and sensory materials and I'm very blunt about that too. "You may bring him in playclothes. You may send in a few outfits that you deem to be playclothes, and I'm happy to help him change when he gets here and before he leaves, as long as he has that available in his cubby. We have smocks available and I will make sure that he wears one. What option would you like to choose?" I find when you don't really react much to it or coddle it, they'll also stop prancing in front of you. Nothing kills that like boredom on your part. But you must be careful to never give an inch to this type of parent. We don't launder the kids clothing at work, and I especially would not offer to do so for anyone who says something as dumb as that. But it wouldn't be tolerated that she send her child sauced with cologne either--lots of kids and adults are sensitive to it. So I think despite my school being frankly super expensive and full of families that could behave like that, you don't see it that often.
unfortunately my director is perfectly fine with her doing this and tells us it’s not our problem to worry about where the clothes are going. he also said that we should do our best to keep him away from messy activities and instead set out something else for him or avoid messy activities entirely on the days he is here. he is a huge ass kisser and doesn’t want to lose this woman’s business (she has three kids enrolled and pays 30k a year in nursery fees)
How exactly do you prove its been thrown out? A photo of it in the bin? Just take the photo and then take them out, wash them and claim innocence if she sees someone wearing it as a spare later. "Oh that top? Oh no, they were donated by a different parent. Yours was thrown out, remember? You have the photo to prove it!"
she requests pictures of it with dirt or food on top so she knows we don’t take it back out and reuse it🫠she’s unlike any parent i’ve met ever
Put a couple of banana skins and some old veggies from lunch on top of it, then take a picture of it in the bin, then fish it out and wash it really really good, then donate it or keep it for playclothes. This woman has mental problems.
Absolutely. It's also not indicative of *"rich people"*. We grew up very wealthy - wealthier than most. My mom would go through my closet often and donate anything I didn't wear. She would often do the same with the toys from my playroom. My parents were/are generous to a fault and got taken advantage of quite a few times, but that's beside the point. This woman is just a nut job.
Yeah, her behavior screams “this is what I think rich people do” when in fact most really wealthy people are pretty prudent with their money. This woman has issues and seems quite mean.
Yard sale
Seriously. Throw a glob of yogurt on top, take a picture, fish out and clean. Voila.
What a pretentious c-
Say no. It is not appropriate to tedirect staff time.to take pics of garbage. Report the center to licensing for.diverting care staff for this drama. Say you are another parent when you call
I cannot believe your director is okay with this. It’s completely unacceptable. This poor child is in your care and he’s really okay with you withholding “messy” activities??? Thats like the majority of the things i do with my 3 year olds AND it’s their favorite activities. That’s just not okay at all.
Hilarious that she thinks dirt or food on top renders it unsaveable
I have been known to just throw out a beyond saving pair of toddler underwear if there is a one off significant poop situation. But I just can't imagine throwing out a perfectly good set of clothes just because they have pee/paint/applesauce on them. This situation is INCREDIBLY bizarre.
The center my kids go to do the same. I made sure to tell younger son’s teacher to not worry out throwing anything away as we had soooooo many 2T underwear from older brother and no more siblings to follow.
yeah i would never play into this
If it’s worth the effort you could put plastic wrap first then add dirt or whatever. The sheer insanity of this is wild though.
that's so fucked up holy shit
if i knew it was legal to do so id go sell the clothes and then use that money for multiple sets of clothes for nursery
I mean... is it explicitly *illegal*?
i’m not sure honestly. i feel like it isn’t but i don’t know
Oh I agree it's not anyone's problem to worry about where the clothes are going. But there are certain things that I just won't be party to, personally. If she flings them out the car window on the drive home it's not sweat off my back even. But I won't be party to denying a child sensory or art experiences unless it's necessary because of aversion or the like on the child's part. Once you start doing stuff like that for one family it can snowball.
Absolutely. In 5 years, these will be the parents who want to control which books are in the school library because they don't want THEIR kid to read them. Rather than take it up with their kid, they want to control the whole school.
Also? If this kind of parent wants to control which books their child has access to and which kinds of activities their child does? They should pull their child from daycare and hire a nanny. Very easy.
I would have words with my director if they accepted this kind of situation. Seriously I’d have a serious talk with him and if he still won’t budge, report them. This is not ok.
That makes no sense. Don’t pretty much all centers have a waitlist a mile long? Who cares if she takes her $30K away? There are other families waiting to pay up!
yes but my setting is in a LCOL area so a lot of the children on the waiting list are paid for by the government which give less money than a paying parent does
Ah, interesting.
Her poor son shouldn’t be restricted from sensory and arty play … poor boy
Most infant care is $2500 per kid per month where I am. Is she getting a huge discount for three kids for that much? It would be a much better deal for the director to get three families in paying the full rate!
no, i’m just in england in a very poor area. parents who pay are very rare and majority of children are funded by the government. when my director gets a paying parent he holds onto them her three children also only attend part time but she wants to get them in full time, upping fees to 75k. in some ways i can’t even blame my director for catering to this woman
I think that’s because this woman is insane. I don’t even know where to start. I agree with you though, OP needs to be boring about it and the problem will resolve.
We also have professional directors who don't bow down to unreasonable/inappropriate parental demands! Makes a big difference. :) I mean, I have run into that mentality before. I can't say I give much thought to what people do in their private lives/home lives, but if they're trying to isolate their child in my classroom or dictate the enrichment and curriculum I do in my classroom because of their own hangups and not a pressing need or aversion of the child, then that's going to be a hard pass from me. I've not yet had a director who will cross that line with me!
Good!!! Kids’ development and experience in the classroom is more important than their parents’ aesthetic.
Check if textiles can be thrown out. Several states have passed laws about textiles and landfills- I keep getting into arguments with my coworker over this. There are bins that take everything you’re just a lazy POS that won’t go the extra step to dump left behind textiles.
During Summer camp last year we had quiet reading time during the centers naptime and we allowed the after school kids to either bring their own books to read for half an hour or borrow some from our personal library. One kid got jealous because his friends were bringing in books that looked cooler than ours so his mom came in and told us it wasn't fair and we needed to tell kids they couldn't bring their own books anymore. Like hell I'm gonna tell a kid not to read.
I had one livid at me and told my boss I tried to kill her child because I let him decorate a gingerbread cookie (not eat! Just decorate) and he had “life threatening allergies” yet she never could produce any documentation stating there were any allergies. That was a Friday. She emailed us the next week and told us he wouldn’t be returning due to some disease he suddenly got that made it so he could no longer walk. That was almost 10 years ago and I still pray for that little boy daily. I have no doubt mom had Munchhausen by proxy. I also had one ask when I’d be teaching them about the prime minister and their job responsibilities. I teach four and five year olds… in America! My favorite though… “you’re a great teacher but you’ll be an amazing one once you become a mom because then you’ll ’get it.’” I guess I’ll never be an amazing teacher since cancer left me infertile. I’m stuck being just a great one. 🙃
You're an amazing teacher, fuck that lady. Anyone can get knocked up and pop out a kid, and a good majority of these parents are horrible. Yet somehow they think that having a kid makes them more educated than people who went to school for the job and work with children all day long. They're not bright.
Thank you! It crushed me but I also know how ignorant people can be so I just ignored her.
I had a parent tell us their child had allergies to several foods. But that they changed weekly (yes the parent said that when we asked for a doctor’s note). We documented what reactions the kid had when exposed (not ingested). She said we didn’t know what we were talking about because he didn’t have any allergies. The week before the kid did. Mom was so mad at us when asked for documentation, she yelled at us, stormed out & tried to slam the front door, but couldn’t due to the slow close door mechanism.
Bahahaha I would have loved to see the slow close door slam! Such an insta karma situation!
A mom once told me I should get a breast reduction….she said I was too busty to work in childcare.
Oh this one is WILD! That is so out of pocket what the hell, what do you even say as a response to that!
I asked if she wanted to pay for it. Luckily my director heard the whole thing as she was down the hall so when the parent told her what happened my director was like “so are you gonna pay for it or not??”. The mom doesn’t do pickup or drop off anymore and the dad still apologizes for his wife’s behavior, and every time I tell him, her actions are not your responsibility, I understand you feel bad but it’s okay.
HAHAHA i don’t know if i should laugh or cry for you
In the baby room there was one ECE with boobs that could always get the babies to go to sleep easier for some reason.
I bet those "ruined" clothes would be worth a lot resold just sayin...
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This. Say that you are not allowed to throw away the clothes. That it has to be the parents decision to throw them away. How awful that she is not allowing her child to be messy and have fun, and that she is creating such waste!
All I’m thinking about is that she wants proof the clothing didn’t get washed and put in the spare clothes bin. WHAT DO YOU CARE YOU WERE GOING TO THEOW IT AWAY.
Probably doesn’t want the riff-raff wearing them
Exactly. Her clothing isn't exclusive if "the poors" wear them. Makes me wonder why her children are in a daycare in a LCOL area, and not an exclusive one.
this is what my deputy said initially but my director disagreed. they had a meeting about it and he told her that it’s perfectly okay to do that
Lol in that case I’d hand them to your supervisor! Let’s see if they can throw perfectly good clothes away … or put them in the hands of the janitor and say loudly “ I’m throwing these perfectly good size “x” clothes away wink wink”
Speaking of “wink wink” I was the director of a church daycare. My supervisor and I took a sharpie marker out to the dumpster and wrote “charity” on it. If anyone wanted to know where something was (old worn out / unsafe toy etc) we would say, “We donated it to charity.” OK. We might have made Jesus sad. This case is different. SO you could get a duffle bag and write “trash” on it. Tell her you put the clothes in the trash…and then give it to someone who has some sense.
Lol! Might’ve made Jesus sad 😂 that’s a funny story and good use of a loophole!
What do you mean by borderline personality? 🤔
i wanted to ask the same
It’s a personality disorder, like a mental illness.
It's totally not about the kid or the clothes. I'm wondering if she is a compulsive shopper or buys them at discount outlets like Ross or TJMax. It's all about mom's issues with control and power dynamics.
i’ve lost that battle unfortunately, my director says she’s allowed to do that and we shouldn’t go against what she wants
Take photos of them in the bin for her and then resell them on Mercari. What is she gonna do about it?
This is what I'd do lol
Honestly, I’m petty, I’d save a messy outfit (wash it myself if food not paint), and keep it for him for messy play. Save a few like that even
Oh this is a good idea
Who says you can’t keep the trash??
So we're just throwing out diagnosis's now ?
“Borderline personality?” If you’re referring to Borderline Personality Disorder, this has literally nothing to do with that.
As someone with bpd your comment is super ableist and offensive and stigmatizing
Was hoping to see a comment like this. I'm not a daycare teacher, I joined this sub mistakenly thinking it was for parents who want advice about sending their kids to daycare and then ended up staying because it's interesting to read from the daycare teacher's POV. But I'm a parent with 2 kids and I am diagnosed with BPD. I think the parent throwing the kids clothes away is nonsense, I think it's even sadder that they're not allowed to go into daycare spare clothes if she doesn't want them as it shows selfishness not just rich obliviousness, if she doesn't want them then donating them is much more ethical than just throwing them away. People shouldn't be diagnosing BPD online and nor should it be a catch all for bad behaviour. People with mental illness can be unreasonable people just like everyone with or without mental illness can learn what is right and reasonable. Same as parents with and without mental illness can be reasonable or unreasonable, good parents or bad.
Glad I’m not the first one to say this. Was shocked to see a fellow educator say something so low.
I have bpd and I don’t find it stigmatizing. I understand that untreated people may exhibit maladaptive behaviors and that it doesn’t mean that it’s all people with bpd. However, I do think the mom kind of sounds more like a narcissist than anything but we aren’t psychologists so we shouldn’t try to diagnose. We’re just hypothesizing.
thank you, i felt the same way
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Gotcha, since I don’t know the kid, never met the Op, my reference was not a nickname and just “metaphorical”. . . hoping OP is sensible and gets it’s meant to “insert child’s name here.”
We all understood that, I'm not sure why that's even being brought up by the person you replied to. There was nothing wrong with your comment.
Had a 8m come in with a "rash" all over his body and the baby was unvac and had a fever. Called parent she said was soap . We told her had fever and going up and she came was very mad. Guess what is was measles! Thank goodness I had one other baby that day. I cleaned after we sent the other home just as a precaution bc that baby was four months.
That is so wasteful and bad for the environment. At the bare minimum, she should donate it!! Also, fragrance is so bad for a baby's sensitive skin. Her values are clearly all messed up. I definitely would tell that parent that she can dispose of her clothes anyway she wants on her own time and just stick it in a bag for her to take.
Honestly, put in trash, take pic, wash. Then offer them up on a local buy nothing page. Guarantee she is not on that. I could not throw away brand new clothes knowing there are so many kids that those clothes would be a blessing to. And I would totally go through this lady's trash on trash day. Anything on the curb is fair game! You know she is throwing away 7 of her brand new outfits a week. OP could probably make more reselling this lady's garbage than she does at her job
The fragrances can cause asthma, and baby clothes literally says it should be washed before being worn because of chemicals used to make it flame resistant. This mom is just mental.
Whenever a child comes in and the parents don't want them dirty, I immediately change them into spares for the day, then change them back before collection. If they ask about photos, I just list all the messy things we did- and let's be honest, its almost all messy play. Grass stains, mud, sand, playdoh, paint, dirt, glue, food stains, water play, slime... and you simply didn't want poor little Johnny missing out on all that fun. After about a week, they usually get it and stop sending them in fancy clothes. Though we do have one mother who insists on sending her 1.5yo in $200 sneakers. We just take them off immediately and put them in his bag, he goes barefoot for the whole day.
yeah we tried this, she saw some pictures posted in the spares and had a FIT. she didn’t want her child wearing ‘some dirty clothes worn by who knows what’ even after we explained that they were washed after every use
Isn’t against licensing for a toddler to go barefoot? Where I am they are required to wear shoes at all times. I had a mom get mad that we lost one of her son’s shoes because they were expensive but I just don’t understand people who buy expensive things for a toddler. They are inevitably gonna lose it, get messy, grow out of it etc. I mean you don’t have to dress your kid in rags but come on.😩
My rule for shoes and children is “if i need to get you a new pair in 6 months or less your getting the walmart ones that are tied together on a string.”
Here parents sign a waiver.
I had a mom send her kid with a diamond bracelet for show and tell. She told me it was real and not to lose it. I told her we can't have it at school and she set it down and walked away. This was 20 years ago and I still remember being shocked.
I think the most disgusting thing about this is not willing to donate. I’ve NEVER met a parent not willing to donate old clothes. Children don’t choose to be poor. Every child deserves weather appropriate clothes in good condition To be so heartless as to throw out perfectly good clothes is just disgusting. I’ve worked with some rich clientele but all of these rich families I work for would agree that throwing away clothes when so many children go without is extremely unethical
At the height of COVID, our illness policy was pretty strict when it came to any COVID-like symptoms (fever, body aches, and, of course, coughing were all treated as exclusionary symptoms that could only come back to the center with a negative COVID test). One day, a 3 year old child came in the morning sucking on what was obviously a cough drop and his dad looked me dead in the eyes and told me “oh he loves those—he eats them regularly like they’re candy.” I had to fight the massive urge to ask him if he thought I was a moron. It came as a shock to nobody when we sent the kid home with a cough and fever a few hours later (presumably after the medicine he told us his parents had given him before school wore off—which was also prohibited in our illness policy). Later when this same family tested positive for COVID they tried to talk the mandatory 5-day exclusion down to 36 hours. Thank god my director at the time told them to bffr
I'm in my 30s and I still have clothes from high school I wear regularly lol
I don't wear my wedding rings at work for a number of reasons (handwashing, don't want to lose them, don't want to scratch the kids, etc). I had a dad accuse me of giving the wrong impression because I don't wear my rings. Um, I'm here to work, not look for anything else.
what tf kind of wrong impression are you giving? that you might be single? why should he care?
Lol I had a parent ask me I allowed the 3 and 4 year olds in my class to choose their pronouns? (She was conservative and against it) Like ma'am, they don't even know what pronouns are? It truly was the weirdest interaction lol
This one’s nuts. I know a couple for year olds that still refer to EVERYONE as “he”. They couldn’t pick their own pronouns even if they cared.
I had someone ask me that too, except I’m in an infant classroom. I remember just blankly staring at them because this had to be a joke, right? Infants are barely aware of their own existence what do you mean pronouns????
that’s crazy, i only learned about pronouns when i was 8ish
This is hilarious and sad at the same time.
Take a picture of them in a garbage bag in a bin. Take the bag out and donate them. That's pure insanity.
For a second I thought you meant to have the child wear a garbage bag lol
Lmfao we would finger paint everyday idgaf 😎
I promise you we would
Bc let me show you how quickly you’ll change your mind when you have to buy him an entirely new wardrobe every month lmfao I will clear this mf closet OUT you hear me?? And “throw it away” in my back seat lol
Talking about “clothes look ugly after you wash them”. Unless you wash them in a puddle, they should be fine. Maybe invest in some Woolite and Shout instead of more expensive toddler clothes 🙄 And I call bullshit anyway bc if you throw the clothes away when they get dirty, then he should be able to get them as dirty he likes. She knows no one is going throw designer clothes away, they’ll just keep him away from the paint, dirt, spaghetti sauce etc
Sounds like a woman living rent free off her sugar daddy bc anyone who makes their own money wouldn’t have this mentality. Even billionaires don’t do shit like this. She’s in la la land I’d milk it for all it’s worth lmao
Why does it matter if his clothes get dirty if she’s just going to throw them away when he takes them off anyways? I would have this boy finger painting every damn day.
Lol. My kid comes home with the dirtiest clothes. And I love it. It shows they had a good time. I also love taking stains out of clothes. So win-win!
i have some parents who live by the the fact that if their child is messy it means they had fun and therefore have clothes that are specifically for nursery. then i have this mum
I swear some of the littles manage to come home looking like this most days: https://fb.watch/smk7LGkBFr/
We had a pink eye outbreak in a home daycare I was working at. The mom of patient zero brought her child back before it was cured and she also apparently didn't get her child the antibiotics meaning all the babies got it. I mentioned to the mom how it had spread and she said, "I just put some breastmilk on Leo's and it clearing it right up! Why don't you rub some into everyone else's eyes since I have the antibody?" Sorry but we can't rub your breastmilk into another baby's eye?
What?????
They were concerned their 5-year-old was getting addicted to Minecraft to the point where it was affecting his moods and general disposition. Turns out he is playing Mincraft for about 4 hours a day.
A parent picked up while we were in line to go outside to play. She flipped on me because now she would have to deal with a tantrum. We went outside at the same time every day, she just came early. It’s my fault she was early I guess lol.
Had a student once that had new clothes every single day. Turns out mom was depressed and a hoarder. She bought new clothes because she didn’t have the energy to wash them and they just became part of the hoard.
I have a 2nd grader who can’t read. Like, he struggles to sound out CVC words. He was placed in an online intervention program to help him bridge his gaps. When he didn’t do the minutes and mom was asked why, she said “it was too hard for him so i just didn’t make him do it”. MA’AM WHAT?!??
Similar but not quite as extreme. Mom asked that her daughters clothes not get dirty (like girl your daughter is 14 months old, she's gonna get dirty). So we started taking her clothes off for anything that could potentially get messy. All meals, all crafts, all sensory table activities, etc. then mom picked up early one day when we were doing snack and her kid was just in a diaper. Mom threw a fit that her daughter had no clothes on even though none of the babies did cause we always remove their clothes for messy meals and activities. Then we started putting a grubby T-shirt over the kids clothes and mom said not to do that because she looks "trashy" in a paint shirt like that. We literally could not win with this woman
There was a mom who told us to never make funny faces at her daughter, because the daughter might throw up. She also expected us to give her Tylenol every 4-6 hours every single day. Our team lead refused, saying it made her uncomfortable to be giving so much medication without being a clear need for it. She got written up for it.
funny faces might make her barf? a constant dosage of tylenol? that's fucking wild
This lady was crazy. She came up with so many different disorders/diseases that her youngest daughter had in the few months she was in my class. After spending 40+ hours a week for 10 months, I was convinced the only thing wrong was reflux, but that’s not uncommon with young babies. She said her daughter had everything from GERD to fibromyalgia to cystic fibrosis. No exaggerations either. It was alarming. One of my coworkers babysat for them once, and said there were buckets for vomit everywhere, and Tylenol all over the place. Very unsettling and alarming. Same lady accused us of having black mold in the basement, because she could “feel it in her teeth” while stomping on the floor. We don’t have a basement lol.
I’d start washing them myself and selling them on fb marketplace…also please tell me what brand of jeans you have that have lasted you that long? I feel like with all my walking and squatting I kill a pair of jeans in a year.
In my experience, regular jeans (I wear Levi's) without any stretch last longer than the stretchy ones (most women's jeans these days, which is why i buy men's jeans or steal my husband's). Stretchy ones wear out easier, especially the knees and butt. Also, if they aren't tight fitting, they last longer. The other issue is washing. Don't wash them too often. Only if they are visibly dirty or smelly. I can wear them a few times before washing, and then only in cold water. I have some over 5 years old that are fine. Although, if you're squatting a lot, you'll blow the knees out fast.
I had a parent accuse me of yanking her child out of her hand when I just gentle took his hand to his seat on the carpet and then ask my co director who I was ..the child is not in my class but I help out in the morning with her class and have been at my center for almost two years and have had multiple interactions with this parent
I cannot stop thinking about that poor boy just sitting there marinating and all of those atrocious fire retardant chemicals every day all day. largely unregulated, constant barrage of chemicals and unsanitary people touching the clothes in the store horrible for the kid
It wasn’t in my class when it happened but it was one of my former children’s parent. It was the older toddler class so biting was an issue, but parents in general get really tender about biting (which is fine mostly). This parent was incensed bc their child was getting bitten by the same kid, even though they worked with children and understood child development. They very casually told the teachers that they considered putting CAYENNE PEPPER in their child’s sunscreen to hurt the biter next time he bit. It was such a cookoo bananas response I lost respect for them when I heard about it from the teachers.
Lol I'm not an ece professional and this just popped up on my feed but I used to work with a rich kid from the mid east who I caught throwing used plates and cutlery away in the trash. They didn't belong to him, they were work property. I asked him why and he said he was embarrassed about having dirty dishes and didn't know what to do. 🫠He said leaving it in the sink was like not flushing the toilet.
Rich people don't waste money like that, temp chunk of money at best. The "try" screams lie. Sad for the child to live that way.
I don’t know what diarrhea is because I don’t have children. Put the parent in their place by adding all of the diapers I’ve done in my professional life (estimate). That parent stopped talking & walked away. Told by a parent how to wipe a nose. There’s so many more…
Oh f*ck this noise. “He will be getting dirty as part of our program, I will NOT be changing his clothing if they’re not wet or highly soiled, and I will not be throwing perfectly good clothing in the trash. You are welcome to take the dirty clothes home with you and do as you wish, but if they are left here unclaimed, I will be washing and keeping them as spares.” And I’m pretty comfortable not doing something stupid that will make my job harder, even if my director told me to. I would not find him other stuff to do, I would not take unnecessary photos of his clothing, none of that. That’s rude to you.
I had a parent tell me that her child (4 years old) plays with sharp knifes so she had to hide all of them up high. He does a lot of other things at home so their house is apparently “extremely baby proofed”. I asked the child why he plays with knifes and he said “idk” and giggled. I regularly remind the child to not play with knifes at home and to listen to his mom, dad, and grandparents. His mom use to pick him up early, but hasn’t in over a year because “he drives us crazy” lol.
Wow. Just… WHAT?! That poor kid.
Keep the “trash” and wash and sell them.
I had a parent that sent their child in an entirely white snowsuit, white hat and white mittens, and demanded it was to he kept spotless. Our yard is mostly sand. Even with the snow on top, everyone gets dirty.
I don't even own white shirts because I couldn't keep one clean for 18 hours at home.
So I work with kindergarten kids in a before and after school program at an elementary school in Canada. A couple weeks ago, a dad came to sign out his child, which was fine. When he was signing out his child, he was trying to make conversation and decided to tell me, “I had to make sure I cut the grass at home before I came to pick up the kids. I’m getting a vasectomy tomorrow.”
that is actually one of the most unhinged things I’ve heard? And I’ve heard a LOT of bullshit lol. Off the top of my head is the parent who won’t let her child eat cupcakes in the classroom unless we take the frosting off because of “sugar” (it isn’t even the dye like it is for a lot of crunchy parents!). Another parent wouldn’t let his child have a singular mini marshmallow because it has “too much sugar.” This was from one of my coworkers, who has a child in my classroom, but she got very upset at I and the other teachers in the classroom for taking her kid outside because he sometimes would chew on the wood chips on the playground (all the kids do this, but we tell them not to/stop them when they do, but sometimes they just do it anyways unfortunately.) Same parent also takes her kid out of the classroom I work in during naptime to the classroom she works in, putting them out of ratio 😬 (as it’s based on the youngest kid in the classroom, the room she works in the ratio is 1:10, the ratio for my classroom is 1:4, and she’s one of three teachers down there.)
This is an environmental nightmare and also this poor kid must have a massive pesticide exposure from wearing not washed clothes. I need more details about this mom. What kind of work does she do? Is she a stupid teen? This is absolutely disgraceful and really quite the burden to put on a little guy. She sounds like she desperately needs a parenting class.
she apparently worked in a nursery setting before but now she’s a SAHM living off her huge inheritance and rich baby daddy. she’s a middle aged woman and genuinely one of the rudest people i ever met. i dread talking to her because she doesn’t treat you like a person, more like some dirt below her. i remember once i complimented her diamond bracelet and she showed me what website she got it off. i tried to explain that i couldn’t afford it and she was SO shocked that most people can’t afford to spend 10k on a bracelet😭
Ewwwwwwww
A stupid teen that's absolutely disgusting. I get that teen mothers are looked down on but it's 2024 stop being so judgemental this isn't the 80s and 90s anymore sweetheart.
I would show her “proof” wash the clothes,resell and donate the money to a cause i know she would hate. Petty? Maybe .lol
Wait, she thinks clothes are ugly after they’ve been washed…once? So she doesn’t wash her kids clothes and puts them on him straight from the store? That grosses me out! Clothing can be treated with chemicals and exposed to all kinds of stuff 😖
We have always basically told the parents tough shit when they ask up to keep their clothes from getting dirty. “It would be developmentally inappropriate and unfair to your child to exclude them from activities to prevent their clothing from becoming dirty. If you do t not feel comfortable with the clothes they are wearing today, you are welcome to drop by a different set of clothes before choice time and we will change them into those clothes.”
No fucking way. Some parents are actually so genuinely fucked
Omg, photo in the trash, launder and donate (what I’d do) - and of course let the poor kid play and get them dirty
Yes, a million times over. And if that loon has to buy a new designer outfit every day it serves her right.
I don’t understand why people don’t wash things before they wear them.
This is why wealth is a plague.
I don't think this is wealth. This is someone trying desperately to look wealthy.
We have a baby who just turned one in our class. We were warned about the mother, who leaves her daughter until exactly closing time 1. Demands pictures, we are required to send 2 a day. We have a class of 12 one year olds, so you can imagine it's hard to get quality pictures of everyone. We also don't have time to out it in unless it's nap time, however sometimes there's other things to do. All day she constantly demands photos no matter how many times we tell her we do what we can. 2. Her clothes CANNOT get dirty. Not even a spot, or she will call the director. She's 1, and she eats like a crazy person and gets food everywhere. And she sends her in WHITE ONSIES all the time 3. The balm, it's a special stick of balm that she insists we put on after every diaper change. First it's unsanitary as you can't clean it so it just has poop particles.....the other day I ACCIDENTALLY didn't press the applied cream for a diaper change and she immediately called and freaked out. On all the baby's wipes has "please put the glo stick after everychange". Every. Single. Pack. Ma'am, if you want personalized care then HIRE A NANNY. we have 12 kids, all 1, all having needs. We take care of your daughter but God damn give us a break
Ok that stick thing is disgusting and a heath hazard, that shouldn’t be allowed. Your director needs to stand up to this tyrant. I’d make sure the kids clothes got as messy as she wanted them, as long as she was having fun/learning new skills. What’s she gonna call the director about? “My child was caught having fun today!”
I’ve had asimilar situation to this, expect the parent wouldn’t throw the clothes away or refuse to wash them and she wasn’t fine with her daughter getting dirty. She definitely was washing and reusing outfits. Mom would get very very upset when the little girl would get dirty because she didn’t want her clothes to be stained. So we would change her into spare clothes after she was dropped off and then put her clothes back on her right before pickup.
What a crazy woman. Most rich people are not like this. I think she has a chip on her shoulder or something to prove.
I have been considering becoming a daycare/preschool teacher at some point, and this is making me reconsider. It must be too sad to see sweet kids with shitty home lives.
Holy shit there are really people on this earth like that?
I would be taking those clothes out of the trash after the photos if it was me, hahaha. There was once a mother who took her child out of the daycare because she claimed there was not enough "academic" learning happening for her 13 month old baby. Did she want us to teach him algebra? The other wildest thing was being told "no" when we told a mom that she should stop feeding her child so much dairy because he was clearly lactose intolerant by the state of his diapers. Every day he would be sent with cheese puffs, yogurt, string cheese etc. She also said no when we suggested she buy the boy shoes that didn't have holes in them. I wonder about that boy and his siblings sometimes. Their parents always seemed to do only the very bare minimum.
She doesn’t wash her kid’s clothes before they wear them? I have had a friend get a staph infection from wearing clothes directly from the store. It’s actually really important to wash your kids clothes before they wear them.
I work in a low income neighborhood. I bring my son’s old clothes because parents don’t even put a change of clothes. They never return the clothes so I see the kids wearing them again and again (which I absolutely don’t mind and actually find funny). I have a boy in the classroom who wears his big sister’s clothes. It’s like we both live in opposite world. 💀