The ego is the one that says it would not have the relationship you describe. In fact, as long as the ego is in control, you don't have relationships, just ego grasping and drama
If the question itself comes from ego and not presence, it won't make any sense outside of ego logic.
Go back to the final chapters of The Power of Now and read them again, this is covered in great detail and better than I can give you here.
Eckhart Tolle ai “There is no doubt that relationships can be based on attraction, and attraction is certainly ego-based.
The question is, does everyone look for a relationship because of ego? I would say no. There are many people that look for a relationship because they desire connection and companionship. Which is not based on ego.
However I would agree to the fact that for a lot of people, the main reason for a relationship, is the ego’s need for gratification.”
I would go so far with even me right now. I like to have a deep intimate relationship. Still I would not chose an unattraktive partner right now. I know that the vibration you are on let alone is attractive. But I would not chose an overweight woman for example. So I think there is way more ego involved then people realize.
I didn’t start out attracted to my partner, we were just great friends. We only dated because I didn’t want to break his heart. Later the attraction appeared.
This question has a lot of layers to it.
First, sexual attraction appears in animals that doesn't have an ego, so you can discard that out.
Second, attraction is not always about physical appearance, there's always a hidden component to it, two different persons can be physically similar and you might feel more attracted to one or the other, in my opinion it's about vibration, besides ego there is a specific vibration to each person, and if you enjoy their vibration you become a friend, or maybe you get sexually or romantically interested in them, see how when you become sexually interested it feels different than when you become romantically interested.
Last but not least, and hoping that I'm not being too direct, from what I read, I think you're using your experience and projecting that in others, also I'm guessing you're a bit young and it's okay that you seek for what you're saying, I personally would date a 60 year old if I'd feel a beautiful connection with her, and I'd also date an overweight woman if that connection was there, even a sexually active relationship, although yes I should feel some form of physical attraction, but I associate that to the reptilian brain which seeks a healthy and fertile mate, rather than ego, now if you unconsciously feel attracted to certain kind of women that resemble your mother then in my opinion that WOULD be ego.
I'd advise you to not overthink it too much, just be ware when you get with someone and your mind wants to start to create problems, for anything else just go with the flow, even Eckhart has a partner, and you can see them holding hands and stuff, it's something beyond ego, we are sentient and sexual beings.
Yes, and ET talks about that with regards to falling in love. He also talks about how it is impossible to get rid of the ego completely, and that instead of looking at it as bad, we should observe it with amusement and curiosity (paraphrasing). Someone said (either Mooji or ET) that our relationship can be our spiritual practice.
The ego is the one that says it would not have the relationship you describe. In fact, as long as the ego is in control, you don't have relationships, just ego grasping and drama
I am just questioning. As soon as we chose an attractive partner and don’t give the „unattractive“ a chance, isn’t there ego involved ?
If the question itself comes from ego and not presence, it won't make any sense outside of ego logic. Go back to the final chapters of The Power of Now and read them again, this is covered in great detail and better than I can give you here.
Humans are social beings, so a relationship is a very natural thing.
Eckhart Tolle ai “There is no doubt that relationships can be based on attraction, and attraction is certainly ego-based. The question is, does everyone look for a relationship because of ego? I would say no. There are many people that look for a relationship because they desire connection and companionship. Which is not based on ego. However I would agree to the fact that for a lot of people, the main reason for a relationship, is the ego’s need for gratification.”
I would go so far with even me right now. I like to have a deep intimate relationship. Still I would not chose an unattraktive partner right now. I know that the vibration you are on let alone is attractive. But I would not chose an overweight woman for example. So I think there is way more ego involved then people realize.
I didn’t start out attracted to my partner, we were just great friends. We only dated because I didn’t want to break his heart. Later the attraction appeared.
I guess you are a woman? Still nice to hear that it worked!
This question has a lot of layers to it. First, sexual attraction appears in animals that doesn't have an ego, so you can discard that out. Second, attraction is not always about physical appearance, there's always a hidden component to it, two different persons can be physically similar and you might feel more attracted to one or the other, in my opinion it's about vibration, besides ego there is a specific vibration to each person, and if you enjoy their vibration you become a friend, or maybe you get sexually or romantically interested in them, see how when you become sexually interested it feels different than when you become romantically interested. Last but not least, and hoping that I'm not being too direct, from what I read, I think you're using your experience and projecting that in others, also I'm guessing you're a bit young and it's okay that you seek for what you're saying, I personally would date a 60 year old if I'd feel a beautiful connection with her, and I'd also date an overweight woman if that connection was there, even a sexually active relationship, although yes I should feel some form of physical attraction, but I associate that to the reptilian brain which seeks a healthy and fertile mate, rather than ego, now if you unconsciously feel attracted to certain kind of women that resemble your mother then in my opinion that WOULD be ego. I'd advise you to not overthink it too much, just be ware when you get with someone and your mind wants to start to create problems, for anything else just go with the flow, even Eckhart has a partner, and you can see them holding hands and stuff, it's something beyond ego, we are sentient and sexual beings.
Thank you !
Yes, and ET talks about that with regards to falling in love. He also talks about how it is impossible to get rid of the ego completely, and that instead of looking at it as bad, we should observe it with amusement and curiosity (paraphrasing). Someone said (either Mooji or ET) that our relationship can be our spiritual practice.