It’s perfectly normal to be gay and if you embrace that part of your identity you’ll be all the happier for it. If you really want to change yourself, you probably won’t succeed, but you’re certainly going to make yourself miserable from the denial and suppression.
I wanna make this clear: **Being gay is not an illness**. But that being said, people are always finding themselves. Forty year old men who thought they were straight can realize that they were gay, or forty year old women can realize that they feel more comfortable with they/them pronouns, and that's just fine. If you realize that you don't want to be labeled gay but as something else (i.e. - pan, bi) or not have a label at all that's great, and if you realize that you are straight, that's also great. The cool part is that we are always evolving, and we are always just figuring ourselves out. You don't need to have your entire identity set by the age of fifteen, or even fifty. Everybody is different and grows at different paces. But if you do want to change, make sure that it's your choice and your choice alone. Nobody has a say in who you are but you!
Thank you for commenting, I've been told that it's connected to some kind of trauma and craving to be more masculine. However, I have my doubts about the story.
Typically any attempt at change results in abuse, either externally by someone else, or self imposed internal abuse. No good will come from trying to change, it’s best to just love who you are.
I grew up in a small town of 3000 people, I joined the military and moved away before I came out. Coming out can be a slow process you do in steps you are comfortable with. Maybe move away and start a new life that you can build the way you want it to be, go to school in a different city. Sometimes it’s easier to open up to people who don’t know you.
But you are aware being straight would quite change that. It's either about how you attractive you are or just how determined you are to get a relationship. But being single can be cool too because you can do things with many people at the same time.
Okay, but I've been told it can affect you from the childhood. Like, if you hang out more with girls and do girly things, you are gonna crave for a male part of you, and the person said that that affects it, something like trauma idk, I don't quiet buy the story tho.
this is NOT TRUE and anyone who tells you things like this is either incredibly homophobic, or disastrously uneducated. please don't listen to bigoted comments like this, and love yourself!!!
No, you can't "change" your sexual orientation. You can explore it, get a better view about what you like, but you most likely won't stop liking guys, most likely you won't become heterosexual.
Science has abolished all those stupid conversion "therapies" and I hope for them to be gone ASAP.
The American Academy of Pediatrics (not the phone American College of Pediatrics) explicitly states that conversion therapy is child abuse and that sexuality cannot be changed. Whilst we still don't know what causes sexuality we at the very least know it's not a choice due to all the credibly data regarding it. So no you cannot just stop being gay and no being gay is not a mental illness.
Being gay is entirely natural and it is in way wrong whether scientifically or morally. I already explained the scientific aspect of it but as for morally we'd have to either prove that it's a moral harm or if it's a moral good to discern if it's morally wrong or not. The data we have regarding it show that gay people are no more likely to be a sexual predator than straight people and that queer parents are just as good at raising children as straight parents are. And for those who say "what about the birth rates?" then know that there's many ways for gay couples to give birth whether it's through bone marrow injections for lesbians or some sort of surrogacy. Also adoption exists so yeah. Also we're not tribalistic cavemen in desperate need of more men to hunt, we already have more than enough people so punishing others for not contributing to birth rates is stupid when we already have a huge surplus of people. As for whether it's an active help to society queer acceptance usually also leads to other forms of acceptance like racial and gender in the same way those forms of acceptance often lead to queer acceptance so I'd argue that if anything the existence of queer people actively helps society.
Well, it was removed from the International Classification of Diseases in 1990, so it is certainly not recognised as any disease or disorder by medical professionals, and those are the people you should listen to, not anyone with a microphone and a lot of money from hate.
Now, to change your sexuality is an idea that has been tried many times and often leads to suffering. For starters, why would you be gay if it was not naturally determined? Nobody promotes being gay and people tend to promote the opposite, so you cannot expect to be able to change that based on observable evidence. Now, we don't yet understand human sexuality enough to know how to determine it scientifically, but we do have some evidence of sexuality being related to epigenetics, meaning that it could be determined in the womb. To cut a long explanation short: it is natural.
Changing your sexuality can only be done by acting against your own desires, and even then it's not really changing anything, it's just a refusal and self-rejection.
Scientific studies and anecdotes have shown that fundamental sexuality can not be changed. Conversion therapy and similar practices result only in distress and self-hate.
Thanks for commenting, I tried changing and it resulted in just that, but still... I just feel bad as i didn't imagine myself as this and even if I am gay, I'm so lonely :(
It is not possible to change one's sexual orientation and efforts to do so have been proven to be harmful and dangerous. Stay safe and reach out if you are struggling but this isn't the solution you may think it is.
sexuality is fluid so, maybe. But probably not. even them, that doesn't change the fact that homosexuality is completely and utterly morally neutral. There is nothing immoral or "bad" about it. So there is literally no point in changing it.
Talking from a scientific psychological perspective sexuality is a little bit like DNA wherein it is produced by different factors, most prominently the environment you are surrounded in and chemical reactions that go on in your brain, those reactions leading to beliefs forming. Someone who surrounds themselves with girls as friends when they are younger are more likely to form hard wiring in their brain that gives them girl behaviours and preferences such as seeking a masculine figure in their life. There is a bit of probability involved as well but I am in no way qualified or able to break that down.
At the end of the day, sexuality is a spectrum that evolved and are evolving over time hence why there are so many. It's like the Islam or Christianity religions didn't like people being together of the same gender, but there was nothing in there about all of the other genders there are nowadays. Evidently also showing that sexuality is influenced by society ideas and chemistry in the brain.
You're born the way you are. Whether that's gay, straight, bisexual, etc. Your perspective on it can shift over time due to you exploring your sexuality, but it won't ever change.
As someone who tried it myself, it doesn’t really work. The most you can do is *suppress* your feelings where you don’t feel any attraction. But still didn’t make me *change* my orientation completely.
Don't even think about it. That's what homophobic people think. It's ok to be how you are and like what you like, I mean being gay is better than being straight abviously I don't even know why you would want to be straight.
Well the facts are, stigmatization of LGBT people leads to higher rates of suicide in the community. Maybe take a long look in the mirror before telling people their love is unnatural.
Hi there, it seems that you have made threats to your own life in your post.
When you're in the middle of something painful, it may feel like you don't have a lot of options. But whatever you're going through, you deserve help and there are people who are here for you.
There are resources available in your area that are free, confidential, and available 24/7:
Call, Text, or Chat with [Canada's Crisis Services Canada](https://www.crisisservicescanada.ca/en/)
Call, Email, or Visit the [UK's Samaritans](https://www.samaritans.org/)
Text CHAT to [America's Crisis Text Line](https://www.crisistextline.org) at 741741.
If you don't see a resource in your area above, the moderators at r/SuicideWatch keep a comprehensive list of resources and hotlines for people organised by location. [Find Someone Now](https://www.reddit.com/r/SuicideWatch/wiki/hotlines)
If you think you may be depressed or struggling in another way, don't ignore it or brush it aside. Take yourself and your feelings seriously, and reach out to someone.
It may not feel like it, but you have options. There are people available to listen to you, and ways to move forward.
Your fellow redditors care about you and there are people who want to help.
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And when did I say that person is not valuable? Y'all are accusing me for something I did not even do. I said that he does have value. When did I say that he is worthy of disgrace?
It’s perfectly normal to be gay and if you embrace that part of your identity you’ll be all the happier for it. If you really want to change yourself, you probably won’t succeed, but you’re certainly going to make yourself miserable from the denial and suppression.
It’s not even succeeding, it’s just that, denial
I guess that's tru, but I'm so lonely even if I accept it 😭 The problems never stop...
🫂
:)
Not the dot dot dot lmao
I wanna make this clear: **Being gay is not an illness**. But that being said, people are always finding themselves. Forty year old men who thought they were straight can realize that they were gay, or forty year old women can realize that they feel more comfortable with they/them pronouns, and that's just fine. If you realize that you don't want to be labeled gay but as something else (i.e. - pan, bi) or not have a label at all that's great, and if you realize that you are straight, that's also great. The cool part is that we are always evolving, and we are always just figuring ourselves out. You don't need to have your entire identity set by the age of fifteen, or even fifty. Everybody is different and grows at different paces. But if you do want to change, make sure that it's your choice and your choice alone. Nobody has a say in who you are but you!
Thank you for commenting, I've been told that it's connected to some kind of trauma and craving to be more masculine. However, I have my doubts about the story.
Of course, when you make stuff up anything can seem rational
I can assure you there is absolutely no scientific evidence to support that at all. People from all sorts of diverse environments are gay
Typically any attempt at change results in abuse, either externally by someone else, or self imposed internal abuse. No good will come from trying to change, it’s best to just love who you are.
I guess, but I'm still lonely + I can't imagine someone knowing that Abt me.
I grew up in a small town of 3000 people, I joined the military and moved away before I came out. Coming out can be a slow process you do in steps you are comfortable with. Maybe move away and start a new life that you can build the way you want it to be, go to school in a different city. Sometimes it’s easier to open up to people who don’t know you.
But you are aware being straight would quite change that. It's either about how you attractive you are or just how determined you are to get a relationship. But being single can be cool too because you can do things with many people at the same time.
It’s not true that you can change your sexuality
Okay, but I've been told it can affect you from the childhood. Like, if you hang out more with girls and do girly things, you are gonna crave for a male part of you, and the person said that that affects it, something like trauma idk, I don't quiet buy the story tho.
no don’t listen to any of this it’s made by homophobes trying to indoctrinate gay children into being “straight”
this is NOT TRUE and anyone who tells you things like this is either incredibly homophobic, or disastrously uneducated. please don't listen to bigoted comments like this, and love yourself!!!
No, you can't "change" your sexual orientation. You can explore it, get a better view about what you like, but you most likely won't stop liking guys, most likely you won't become heterosexual. Science has abolished all those stupid conversion "therapies" and I hope for them to be gone ASAP.
The American Academy of Pediatrics (not the phone American College of Pediatrics) explicitly states that conversion therapy is child abuse and that sexuality cannot be changed. Whilst we still don't know what causes sexuality we at the very least know it's not a choice due to all the credibly data regarding it. So no you cannot just stop being gay and no being gay is not a mental illness. Being gay is entirely natural and it is in way wrong whether scientifically or morally. I already explained the scientific aspect of it but as for morally we'd have to either prove that it's a moral harm or if it's a moral good to discern if it's morally wrong or not. The data we have regarding it show that gay people are no more likely to be a sexual predator than straight people and that queer parents are just as good at raising children as straight parents are. And for those who say "what about the birth rates?" then know that there's many ways for gay couples to give birth whether it's through bone marrow injections for lesbians or some sort of surrogacy. Also adoption exists so yeah. Also we're not tribalistic cavemen in desperate need of more men to hunt, we already have more than enough people so punishing others for not contributing to birth rates is stupid when we already have a huge surplus of people. As for whether it's an active help to society queer acceptance usually also leads to other forms of acceptance like racial and gender in the same way those forms of acceptance often lead to queer acceptance so I'd argue that if anything the existence of queer people actively helps society.
Well, it was removed from the International Classification of Diseases in 1990, so it is certainly not recognised as any disease or disorder by medical professionals, and those are the people you should listen to, not anyone with a microphone and a lot of money from hate. Now, to change your sexuality is an idea that has been tried many times and often leads to suffering. For starters, why would you be gay if it was not naturally determined? Nobody promotes being gay and people tend to promote the opposite, so you cannot expect to be able to change that based on observable evidence. Now, we don't yet understand human sexuality enough to know how to determine it scientifically, but we do have some evidence of sexuality being related to epigenetics, meaning that it could be determined in the womb. To cut a long explanation short: it is natural. Changing your sexuality can only be done by acting against your own desires, and even then it's not really changing anything, it's just a refusal and self-rejection.
I imagined myself as aro/ace but without a label. I guess I maybe lied to myself? Idk, thanks for commenting:)
You don't have to know, it's all about having fun :D
Well, thank you. Still a bit scared, but I feel relived there are people like me at least...
Was told I'm doing it for attention...
That makes no fucking sense why would you do it only to get hated bruh
Yeah I dont know. I didn't even tell anybody I kept it to myself until someone asked.
you cant change ur sexuality but its usually more fluid then ppl think
Hard believer of this\^\^
Scientific studies and anecdotes have shown that fundamental sexuality can not be changed. Conversion therapy and similar practices result only in distress and self-hate.
I'm curious about this too
Me too, me too...
1. Not an illness 2. I firmly believe that it can change due to the nature of the human being, but you cant force it out no matter what you do
Thanks for commenting, I tried changing and it resulted in just that, but still... I just feel bad as i didn't imagine myself as this and even if I am gay, I'm so lonely :(
I’ve been trying for a while and it’s not working. If you find anything lmk.
Okay, thanks for commenting
“Ha! No.” -Alastor It can’t be changed, it’s who you are, it’s just misinformation
It is not possible to change one's sexual orientation and efforts to do so have been proven to be harmful and dangerous. Stay safe and reach out if you are struggling but this isn't the solution you may think it is.
I've been asking myself that same question
sexuality is fluid so, maybe. But probably not. even them, that doesn't change the fact that homosexuality is completely and utterly morally neutral. There is nothing immoral or "bad" about it. So there is literally no point in changing it.
Talking from a scientific psychological perspective sexuality is a little bit like DNA wherein it is produced by different factors, most prominently the environment you are surrounded in and chemical reactions that go on in your brain, those reactions leading to beliefs forming. Someone who surrounds themselves with girls as friends when they are younger are more likely to form hard wiring in their brain that gives them girl behaviours and preferences such as seeking a masculine figure in their life. There is a bit of probability involved as well but I am in no way qualified or able to break that down. At the end of the day, sexuality is a spectrum that evolved and are evolving over time hence why there are so many. It's like the Islam or Christianity religions didn't like people being together of the same gender, but there was nothing in there about all of the other genders there are nowadays. Evidently also showing that sexuality is influenced by society ideas and chemistry in the brain.
People can change their attractions as they go through life
You're born the way you are. Whether that's gay, straight, bisexual, etc. Your perspective on it can shift over time due to you exploring your sexuality, but it won't ever change.
As someone who tried it myself, it doesn’t really work. The most you can do is *suppress* your feelings where you don’t feel any attraction. But still didn’t make me *change* my orientation completely.
You cannot change from being gay. Don't even try to do it, you'll end up phycologically screwing yourself up.
Don't even think about it. That's what homophobic people think. It's ok to be how you are and like what you like, I mean being gay is better than being straight abviously I don't even know why you would want to be straight.
BEING GAY ISNT A ILLNES OK ITS GENETICALLY if you believe it's bad or a illnes I guess they have won
[удалено]
OP, you probably shouldn’t listen to this guy
What did the parent comment say
Citing bible verses about how being gay is a sin
So a troll then
Everybody does as he pleases. I've said that was just my POV. I don't intent to harm everybody.
Well the facts are, stigmatization of LGBT people leads to higher rates of suicide in the community. Maybe take a long look in the mirror before telling people their love is unnatural.
Hi there, it seems that you have made threats to your own life in your post. When you're in the middle of something painful, it may feel like you don't have a lot of options. But whatever you're going through, you deserve help and there are people who are here for you. There are resources available in your area that are free, confidential, and available 24/7: Call, Text, or Chat with [Canada's Crisis Services Canada](https://www.crisisservicescanada.ca/en/) Call, Email, or Visit the [UK's Samaritans](https://www.samaritans.org/) Text CHAT to [America's Crisis Text Line](https://www.crisistextline.org) at 741741. If you don't see a resource in your area above, the moderators at r/SuicideWatch keep a comprehensive list of resources and hotlines for people organised by location. [Find Someone Now](https://www.reddit.com/r/SuicideWatch/wiki/hotlines) If you think you may be depressed or struggling in another way, don't ignore it or brush it aside. Take yourself and your feelings seriously, and reach out to someone. It may not feel like it, but you have options. There are people available to listen to you, and ways to move forward. Your fellow redditors care about you and there are people who want to help. If you are in danger or an emergency situation, please call your local emergency number e.g. 911,999,112. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/GayBroTeens) if you have any questions or concerns.*
And when did I say that person is not valuable? Y'all are accusing me for something I did not even do. I said that he does have value. When did I say that he is worthy of disgrace?
I tried changing because I didn't imagine myself like this, but it just doesn't work.
Most likely not but maybe try it and see if it works
It’s not possible and it’s always using abuse
Oh ok
I tried changing but it doesn't go away, thank you for commenting at least, I appreciate the time you put into commenting :)
Oh you're welcome 😁
:)