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Op pls don't apologize!! I hate how women feel forced to apologize because people jump down their throats.
You're literally talking about your lived experiences and how you want to change it, and people are freaking out on you
That being said, you are absolutely justified to want a new friend group and to distance yourself from those clowns.
Pls do. And also, it would be fantastic if you did a takedown of them before you left. Not sure if you can/want to, but outlining why you're leaving and that they need to grow tf up, and go touch grass. Ha.
If you still wish to be friends and want to go through it, you can absolutely reach out individually to these friends where they should be much more reasonable to speak with.
If you do that and it doesn’t work out, or you don’t feel it is worth your time, this subreddit and the subreddits for the types of games you enjoy are a decent start! Look for majority-women or half-and-half communities I find they have the most pleasant men because they have so many women around them that will set them straight.
Adding to this: Some of the smaller subs dedicated to specific games can be really welcoming. From personal experience I have had only positive experiences in Returnal and Evil Within, for example. They made me feel like I belonged there. The smaller, more focused subs tend to attract the "real", as in, the players who really actually love the games and just want a place to share their enthusiasm with others.
This is why I will only ever befriend men who voluntarily have women in their lives already. So not just men who work with women, but men who engage socially with women after work. Join activities where there are women (like a hiking club, book club, volunteer organization, that’s close to 50/50). Have female friends.
That’s the bare minimum for me. It’s not a guarantee, but a man who chooses to spend his time around a fairly even mix of men and women is far more likely to be a decent dude.
Sorry there’s nothing covert about their misogyny or racism. Like, what the actual fuck?!
They’re either, total shitbags or they’re fucking idiots acting like shitbags because they think it’s funny/cool/edgy etc. honestly, don’t know which is worse.
Please get rid of these fuckwits.
Nah these guys just suck. I have a group of mostly male friends to play games with and not one of them is racist or sexist. We don’t argue at all, we just build off of each other’s opinions and have fun discussions.
They are out there, just not in this group you’re friends with. You deserve better, they don’t care about you as a person!
Yeah, not to “not all men” in here but I also have a mostly male gaming group that wouldn’t act like that. And who would actively shut that shit down. These “friends” of OPs ain’t it. Sorry they had to deal with that tho.
I’m sure they can find a group of better people, real friends!
I don't think you're "not all men"ing, I think it's important to point out that there is no excuse for this behavior. plenty of normal and well adjusted men exist who can be perfectly fun and comfortable to hang out around. ones who act like the OP describes are completely unnecessary and don't need to be tolerated just to have a community of your own
Yeah same with mine, one of the guys in the group is a big creator and he publicly called out some other men for how they were treating women in the community. Tons of other men joined him in support, women too.
It’s most men for sure, but there are some that do genuinely respect women and people in general. I’m proud to be friends with them!
See this is why i assume dude gamers are racist misogynists until definitively proven otherwise. These offensive youtubers, harassment campaigns, and offensive games don't pull millions of supporters out of nowhere. They're literally right next to you.
> 3. I know not all men are gross.
Girl you don't need to apologize for any men that may be harassing you over this post. They can fuck off with that "not all men" logic. Venting about a systemic problem is not equal to condemning all men. Over sexualization and insensitivity are problems in masculine culture and you're right to point that out in men who exhibit those qualities. You're doing fantastic, thank you for sharing this post, your feelings, and your experiences ❤️❤️
I think what people are concerned about is that it seems like OP is putting up with this behavior because she thinks it’s normal and expected for male gamers, which it absolutely is not and should not be treated as such.
I'm really confused as to why you put up with that. Just ghost them all and join this subreddit's discord. Your "friends" seriously don't even deserve a second thought, and are probably going to use you as a shield when they attack other marginalized groups.
These guys have caught some rightwing rage machine brain worms from the grifters pumping that shit up before an election cycle. Having those opinions at all is bad. Airing them in front of a poc woman is deeply unempathetic to say the least, but I suppose it’s better than them hiding their real selves around you, then saying all the same shit behind your back.
First of all, your feelings are valid. Second, you are justified in trying to seek out a better circle. If you feel comfortable reaching out to any of these people individually with how you were hurt, you can definitely do that, but you also aren’t obligated to be vulnerable around people who make you feel unsafe. Take care!
> brain worms from the grifters
literally lol. they've bought the mindset hook line and sinker. usually they will grow out of it eventually but not always..
No, but my male *friends* (as opposed to acquaintances) aren't misogynistic troglodytes.
Admittedly I don't have a lot of friends I hang out with in meatspace bc we're scattered all over the world (careers etc will do that to you), so I mostly stick to friendly online spaces e.g. specific Discords that are either vast majority female or just civilised. For example the BG3 main subreddit is generally a very welcoming space, as you might expect for a game well-known for its inclusiveness.
Don't be sorry for making this post! Lots of people have vented on here, if they deserve a spot so do you.
And I do think you should follow your own thoughts here and distance yourself from them. Or at least the toxic ones. Maybe you could still salvage your friendship with the ones that were also uncomfortable, though that should be up to you of course.
I think I understand where you're coming from though. I used to have a similar outlook, where I thought I had to be nice at all times even when others definitely weren't just to keep peace. I'm not saying this from a place of judgment, because I know it can be tough breaking this habit. But it's worth working on this. It feels liberating, I promise.
Commenting after the OP’s edit since I’m only just seeing this now.
First, 4 - don’t apologize. It’s totally ok to share your feelings here! I get the anxiety, it’s okay! Just don’t want you to panic and go into hiding.
Second, here’s what you do if you have plans to hang with the same group (or similar group) the next showcase type thing: if you can invite girls, do that, but also, chat with the actual friends/decent guys in the group ahead of time. When the shit comes up, all you discomforted people need to agree to all speak up together. Make THEM uncomfortable. They are the ones saying bad stuff. You guys are just trying to enjoy yourselves. It won’t work if just one person speakers up, but if a group gets going, you might just shut them up early. Make a sport of it. Maybe a drinking game. And call them out every single time.
I'm respected enough in my friend group to be able to scold/reach out to my male friends when they're being assholes and have them actually listen. Either voice out your concerns or find a new group that hears your voice. Sometimes ppl aren't aware they're being assholes (especially in an echo chamber) so you need to be the voice. or if you don't feel that space is a comfortable space for you to say all these things, then consider finding a new group altogether.
I have put up with a lot for the sake of friendship. (And romantic relationships but that’s another story). I thought I was being too picky and that my feelings of discomfort were something I needed to get over.
Eventually, I realized I needed to have friends that aligned more with my own values. But it took time to get there. Time and practice. It was lonely at times.
It’s okay that you were trying to give these guys a chance. It’s great that you’re questioning their place in your life. It will help you in the future with discernment. I wasted most of my 20s and early 30s putting up with whatever friends shared my interests, instead of seeking out real relationships.
It’s never too late to start investing in yourself and finding genuine relationships. Remember you are the gatekeeper to your time and energy. It is valuable. You get to decide who has access to it.
>The constant crying over brown people being in videogames and comments on female characters not looking attractive
JFC
>I'm considering just distancing myself from these people and build a social circle from scratch.
I mean... This is advice from some random dude on the internet so take it as such but that seems like *a solid plan*.
Maybe you could make your own discord server where you only invite people that you personally vibe with. I'd be down to be friends (29nb/afab) but I am also super introverted and honestly not really a "fun" friend I guess lol. I had a similar moment when I was younger when I just realised all the guys I was gaming with weren't....great. It's been hard to build back up to having a decent amount of gaming friends but I'm so much happier and more relaxed with the few I have these days. Value yourself, and don't hang with people who don't. Much love.
At this point. I've come to expect all gaming spaces (specially FPS or any kind of competetive game) to be toxic. It's the main reasons why I'll solo a lot of MMORPGS, competitive games, etc. People are trash for the most part but the few you find that are awesome people to play with are fleeting.
honestly, I relate to this hard. I used to have a group of "friends" I played games with online, but I ended up distancing myself from them for exactly the same reason, and eventually cut them out completely.
It sucked, because I grew up with those people, but I knew from the way they behaved that they would never truly respect me, and they kind of just got worse over time. ultimately I did end up establishing an entirely new group of friends and I enjoy playing with them much more, because I know that they respect me.
those kinds of people won't ever respect you, especially if they are so comfortable with saying those kinds of things around you. I would say that it's best to start finding a new group of people to play with.
Hey if you need a new group to roll with that’s inclusive, kind, but talk a little bit of smack then hit me up! Sorry the post getting big has you anxious, but I hope it leads to some better games for you in the future. Cheers!
Disclaimer: I'm a man, I enjoy visiting this sub bc people's perspectives on the hobby here are leagues better than the mainstream subs.
As a man though I have a very hard time bonding with cis men, especially heterosexual ones. I do think you're right to look for more diverse friends, you'll definitely enjoy their company more.
I’ve got a bunch of guy friends who would never in a million years make comments like that. I think you need to find new “friends” regardless of gender
I went out of my way to avoid most people online and constructed a friend group that I game with. It's worked out really well for the most part, but even then there have been some awful opinions aired, but normally the group self regulates. I can not suggest this enough, although it is far from perfect, I am always on the lookout for more people to join and a lot of the things I do are in male dominated spaces and this has still reflected in my friend group too, but still must recommend
i relate. i love my male gamer friends but some just can't help let a sexist comment slide or talk abt me/other women in a sexual manner that makes my hair stick on end. hope u find a good gaming group x
I have also struggled with overlooking toxic behavior in order to keep “friends” whom I’m no longer friends with 🤷🏽♀️. You should distance yourself from those people and maybe start up a new friend group with the ones you said were also uncomfortable. I’d be happy to join too!
I’m sorry you’re feeling bad about this post. I deeply sympathize. I was once part of an online friend group/community who I would’ve said were mostly good guys.
Then Gamergate happened. And I was shocked at how quickly some of these people who I’d genuinely thought were my friends became unrecognizable. Any sort of questioning of their beliefs got you labeled as an enemy. In the end I just left and never went back. I’m a lot more careful about where I invest my time these days, but I wish I didn’t have to be.
I’m loving the game Control right now, but I can’t play when my husband is around. He either wants to “help” me with the game (he’s never played) or complain about how ugly Jesse is. I’m 46 so I don’t have any IRL girl gamer friends. I totally get where you are coming from.
I’m also playing Control atm!
Also geez your husband should just let you play. Also not sure what about the oldest house screams “here be eye candy for ye lonely sailors” even if you don’t find Jesse pretty (she is).
What is the age group?
Almost all my friends are guys and I don't deal with this at all, but all my friends are between 38-50s...
I feel like all the toxic posts about gamer guys are guys in their 20s to early 30s.
If you haven't already, you need to cut these douchebags out, maybe tell them that they're shit people, perhaps one of them will be inspired to reflect on their behavior but probably not. 🙄
personally, if someone makes me feel that way, I just leave. and I don't mean for that session, I mean I leave the server and do not come back. I don't say anything I just leave.
people who act like that can be miserable and lonely until they fix themselves, I'm not going to waste even one second trying to convince them to be decent people. that's their battle not mine.
It’s funny I’ve never looked at a video game and thought to myself “wow a black character?!!” Like that’s just not something I’d ever waste time being concerned about
Do you play pc games at all? Or play overwatch 2? Id invite you to play with me and some of my friends, i make sure the space is welcome and inclusive. If any of my friends said shit like that, id kick them out right away. And they know it, lol
I have slowly started to realise why I don't get much pushback when I rant about racist shit is because it's kinda rare.
Well, i don't get pushback from non white people. I get either nodding or often some really insightful stories.
White people that come into range of it often tell me I imagine the crap I get for my Middle Eastern sounding name.
Don't apologise.
I.. know it's really hard.
The only reason I'm such a loudmouth about it is I am mostly white, pass, and at my age don't have many friends or the energy to make them.
I still couldn't push back in a group like that either.
You are wonderful and nobody should ever tell you otherwise.
Im sorry these casual friends were so terrible when you were right there.
I mean.. I know lots of guys don't realize some casual misogyny... but it sounds way to much like the "Oh but we Love Jews" I used to get from people in my 20s after some antisemitic crap was said around me.
I'm apologising TO YOU. You shouldn't have to deal with that and I wish the shitty world I grew up in in the 80s had gotten a lot better.
But You still remain a wonderful person and remember that.
Girl I don’t have a pc I’ve got an Xbox but I would be so down to play something ! I need girl gamer friends too I literally only play with my husband. Ditch those guys though fr that sounds terrible to be around
None of my male friends I game with ever bring up any concerns like this because they’re not concerns, it’s just pointless and blatant racism and misogyny. I’m sorry you had to sit thru this, OP. Hopefully you can find some people who don’t waste their time just exuding hate
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Op pls don't apologize!! I hate how women feel forced to apologize because people jump down their throats. You're literally talking about your lived experiences and how you want to change it, and people are freaking out on you That being said, you are absolutely justified to want a new friend group and to distance yourself from those clowns. Pls do. And also, it would be fantastic if you did a takedown of them before you left. Not sure if you can/want to, but outlining why you're leaving and that they need to grow tf up, and go touch grass. Ha.
I hope they aren't still your "friends." That's absolutely disgusting behavior
If you still wish to be friends and want to go through it, you can absolutely reach out individually to these friends where they should be much more reasonable to speak with. If you do that and it doesn’t work out, or you don’t feel it is worth your time, this subreddit and the subreddits for the types of games you enjoy are a decent start! Look for majority-women or half-and-half communities I find they have the most pleasant men because they have so many women around them that will set them straight.
Adding to this: Some of the smaller subs dedicated to specific games can be really welcoming. From personal experience I have had only positive experiences in Returnal and Evil Within, for example. They made me feel like I belonged there. The smaller, more focused subs tend to attract the "real", as in, the players who really actually love the games and just want a place to share their enthusiasm with others.
The men in communities of mostly women definitely tend to be nicer!
This is why I will only ever befriend men who voluntarily have women in their lives already. So not just men who work with women, but men who engage socially with women after work. Join activities where there are women (like a hiking club, book club, volunteer organization, that’s close to 50/50). Have female friends. That’s the bare minimum for me. It’s not a guarantee, but a man who chooses to spend his time around a fairly even mix of men and women is far more likely to be a decent dude.
Sorry there’s nothing covert about their misogyny or racism. Like, what the actual fuck?! They’re either, total shitbags or they’re fucking idiots acting like shitbags because they think it’s funny/cool/edgy etc. honestly, don’t know which is worse. Please get rid of these fuckwits.
Nah these guys just suck. I have a group of mostly male friends to play games with and not one of them is racist or sexist. We don’t argue at all, we just build off of each other’s opinions and have fun discussions. They are out there, just not in this group you’re friends with. You deserve better, they don’t care about you as a person!
Yeah, not to “not all men” in here but I also have a mostly male gaming group that wouldn’t act like that. And who would actively shut that shit down. These “friends” of OPs ain’t it. Sorry they had to deal with that tho. I’m sure they can find a group of better people, real friends!
I don't think you're "not all men"ing, I think it's important to point out that there is no excuse for this behavior. plenty of normal and well adjusted men exist who can be perfectly fun and comfortable to hang out around. ones who act like the OP describes are completely unnecessary and don't need to be tolerated just to have a community of your own
Yeah same with mine, one of the guys in the group is a big creator and he publicly called out some other men for how they were treating women in the community. Tons of other men joined him in support, women too. It’s most men for sure, but there are some that do genuinely respect women and people in general. I’m proud to be friends with them!
That sounds like an absolute bummer of a night. Also Aloy is really good looking. Like Hollywood action protagonist good looking
Yeah, she's literally modeled off of Dutch actress and model Hannah Hoekstra.
I don’t think we have the same definition of “friends”…
Yeah, I don't think I could stay "friends" with people like this
See this is why i assume dude gamers are racist misogynists until definitively proven otherwise. These offensive youtubers, harassment campaigns, and offensive games don't pull millions of supporters out of nowhere. They're literally right next to you.
> 3. I know not all men are gross. Girl you don't need to apologize for any men that may be harassing you over this post. They can fuck off with that "not all men" logic. Venting about a systemic problem is not equal to condemning all men. Over sexualization and insensitivity are problems in masculine culture and you're right to point that out in men who exhibit those qualities. You're doing fantastic, thank you for sharing this post, your feelings, and your experiences ❤️❤️
I think what people are concerned about is that it seems like OP is putting up with this behavior because she thinks it’s normal and expected for male gamers, which it absolutely is not and should not be treated as such.
I'm really confused as to why you put up with that. Just ghost them all and join this subreddit's discord. Your "friends" seriously don't even deserve a second thought, and are probably going to use you as a shield when they attack other marginalized groups.
Seriously, why would anyone tolerate this?
These guys have caught some rightwing rage machine brain worms from the grifters pumping that shit up before an election cycle. Having those opinions at all is bad. Airing them in front of a poc woman is deeply unempathetic to say the least, but I suppose it’s better than them hiding their real selves around you, then saying all the same shit behind your back. First of all, your feelings are valid. Second, you are justified in trying to seek out a better circle. If you feel comfortable reaching out to any of these people individually with how you were hurt, you can definitely do that, but you also aren’t obligated to be vulnerable around people who make you feel unsafe. Take care!
> brain worms from the grifters literally lol. they've bought the mindset hook line and sinker. usually they will grow out of it eventually but not always..
You don’t need to apologise and you haven’t caused a stir 💜 people aren’t upset with you. They want you to have situations that feel good for you
Wouldn't be friends anymore after that.
I have guy friends who never comment on this stuff, at all. Your friends can do better, and are choosing not to.
No, but my male *friends* (as opposed to acquaintances) aren't misogynistic troglodytes. Admittedly I don't have a lot of friends I hang out with in meatspace bc we're scattered all over the world (careers etc will do that to you), so I mostly stick to friendly online spaces e.g. specific Discords that are either vast majority female or just civilised. For example the BG3 main subreddit is generally a very welcoming space, as you might expect for a game well-known for its inclusiveness.
Don't be sorry for making this post! Lots of people have vented on here, if they deserve a spot so do you. And I do think you should follow your own thoughts here and distance yourself from them. Or at least the toxic ones. Maybe you could still salvage your friendship with the ones that were also uncomfortable, though that should be up to you of course. I think I understand where you're coming from though. I used to have a similar outlook, where I thought I had to be nice at all times even when others definitely weren't just to keep peace. I'm not saying this from a place of judgment, because I know it can be tough breaking this habit. But it's worth working on this. It feels liberating, I promise.
Commenting after the OP’s edit since I’m only just seeing this now. First, 4 - don’t apologize. It’s totally ok to share your feelings here! I get the anxiety, it’s okay! Just don’t want you to panic and go into hiding. Second, here’s what you do if you have plans to hang with the same group (or similar group) the next showcase type thing: if you can invite girls, do that, but also, chat with the actual friends/decent guys in the group ahead of time. When the shit comes up, all you discomforted people need to agree to all speak up together. Make THEM uncomfortable. They are the ones saying bad stuff. You guys are just trying to enjoy yourselves. It won’t work if just one person speakers up, but if a group gets going, you might just shut them up early. Make a sport of it. Maybe a drinking game. And call them out every single time.
I'm respected enough in my friend group to be able to scold/reach out to my male friends when they're being assholes and have them actually listen. Either voice out your concerns or find a new group that hears your voice. Sometimes ppl aren't aware they're being assholes (especially in an echo chamber) so you need to be the voice. or if you don't feel that space is a comfortable space for you to say all these things, then consider finding a new group altogether.
I have put up with a lot for the sake of friendship. (And romantic relationships but that’s another story). I thought I was being too picky and that my feelings of discomfort were something I needed to get over. Eventually, I realized I needed to have friends that aligned more with my own values. But it took time to get there. Time and practice. It was lonely at times. It’s okay that you were trying to give these guys a chance. It’s great that you’re questioning their place in your life. It will help you in the future with discernment. I wasted most of my 20s and early 30s putting up with whatever friends shared my interests, instead of seeking out real relationships. It’s never too late to start investing in yourself and finding genuine relationships. Remember you are the gatekeeper to your time and energy. It is valuable. You get to decide who has access to it.
Get new friends.
>The constant crying over brown people being in videogames and comments on female characters not looking attractive JFC >I'm considering just distancing myself from these people and build a social circle from scratch. I mean... This is advice from some random dude on the internet so take it as such but that seems like *a solid plan*.
No because my male friends are pretty awesome in the sense that they don’t talk like that, ever. Maybe it’s time to find new friends.
Maybe you could make your own discord server where you only invite people that you personally vibe with. I'd be down to be friends (29nb/afab) but I am also super introverted and honestly not really a "fun" friend I guess lol. I had a similar moment when I was younger when I just realised all the guys I was gaming with weren't....great. It's been hard to build back up to having a decent amount of gaming friends but I'm so much happier and more relaxed with the few I have these days. Value yourself, and don't hang with people who don't. Much love.
At this point. I've come to expect all gaming spaces (specially FPS or any kind of competetive game) to be toxic. It's the main reasons why I'll solo a lot of MMORPGS, competitive games, etc. People are trash for the most part but the few you find that are awesome people to play with are fleeting.
honestly, I relate to this hard. I used to have a group of "friends" I played games with online, but I ended up distancing myself from them for exactly the same reason, and eventually cut them out completely. It sucked, because I grew up with those people, but I knew from the way they behaved that they would never truly respect me, and they kind of just got worse over time. ultimately I did end up establishing an entirely new group of friends and I enjoy playing with them much more, because I know that they respect me. those kinds of people won't ever respect you, especially if they are so comfortable with saying those kinds of things around you. I would say that it's best to start finding a new group of people to play with.
Hey if you need a new group to roll with that’s inclusive, kind, but talk a little bit of smack then hit me up! Sorry the post getting big has you anxious, but I hope it leads to some better games for you in the future. Cheers!
Disclaimer: I'm a man, I enjoy visiting this sub bc people's perspectives on the hobby here are leagues better than the mainstream subs. As a man though I have a very hard time bonding with cis men, especially heterosexual ones. I do think you're right to look for more diverse friends, you'll definitely enjoy their company more.
Men ☕
What kind of men you guys interacting with? Damn. I guess it's the group dynamic of certain guy friends.
I’ve got a bunch of guy friends who would never in a million years make comments like that. I think you need to find new “friends” regardless of gender
I went out of my way to avoid most people online and constructed a friend group that I game with. It's worked out really well for the most part, but even then there have been some awful opinions aired, but normally the group self regulates. I can not suggest this enough, although it is far from perfect, I am always on the lookout for more people to join and a lot of the things I do are in male dominated spaces and this has still reflected in my friend group too, but still must recommend
i relate. i love my male gamer friends but some just can't help let a sexist comment slide or talk abt me/other women in a sexual manner that makes my hair stick on end. hope u find a good gaming group x
What are we playing girl
I have also struggled with overlooking toxic behavior in order to keep “friends” whom I’m no longer friends with 🤷🏽♀️. You should distance yourself from those people and maybe start up a new friend group with the ones you said were also uncomfortable. I’d be happy to join too!
I’m sorry you’re feeling bad about this post. I deeply sympathize. I was once part of an online friend group/community who I would’ve said were mostly good guys. Then Gamergate happened. And I was shocked at how quickly some of these people who I’d genuinely thought were my friends became unrecognizable. Any sort of questioning of their beliefs got you labeled as an enemy. In the end I just left and never went back. I’m a lot more careful about where I invest my time these days, but I wish I didn’t have to be.
If they're ok with letting you be so uncomfortable, then they aren't your friends.
Hey how goes? Feel free to message me, I’m always looking for gal friends! 😊
No need to apologize for venting. And I definitely agree that you can find much better friends out there, no matter their gender!
I’m loving the game Control right now, but I can’t play when my husband is around. He either wants to “help” me with the game (he’s never played) or complain about how ugly Jesse is. I’m 46 so I don’t have any IRL girl gamer friends. I totally get where you are coming from.
WTF, every time I see screenshots of Jesse from Control I think "dang she's pretty."
Right??
I’m also playing Control atm! Also geez your husband should just let you play. Also not sure what about the oldest house screams “here be eye candy for ye lonely sailors” even if you don’t find Jesse pretty (she is).
Nah you just have terrible friends.
What is the age group? Almost all my friends are guys and I don't deal with this at all, but all my friends are between 38-50s... I feel like all the toxic posts about gamer guys are guys in their 20s to early 30s.
If you haven't already, you need to cut these douchebags out, maybe tell them that they're shit people, perhaps one of them will be inspired to reflect on their behavior but probably not. 🙄
That's a group you don't need to be around oe associating with. Gross.
personally, if someone makes me feel that way, I just leave. and I don't mean for that session, I mean I leave the server and do not come back. I don't say anything I just leave. people who act like that can be miserable and lonely until they fix themselves, I'm not going to waste even one second trying to convince them to be decent people. that's their battle not mine.
It’s funny I’ve never looked at a video game and thought to myself “wow a black character?!!” Like that’s just not something I’d ever waste time being concerned about
Do you play pc games at all? Or play overwatch 2? Id invite you to play with me and some of my friends, i make sure the space is welcome and inclusive. If any of my friends said shit like that, id kick them out right away. And they know it, lol
I have slowly started to realise why I don't get much pushback when I rant about racist shit is because it's kinda rare. Well, i don't get pushback from non white people. I get either nodding or often some really insightful stories. White people that come into range of it often tell me I imagine the crap I get for my Middle Eastern sounding name. Don't apologise. I.. know it's really hard. The only reason I'm such a loudmouth about it is I am mostly white, pass, and at my age don't have many friends or the energy to make them. I still couldn't push back in a group like that either. You are wonderful and nobody should ever tell you otherwise. Im sorry these casual friends were so terrible when you were right there. I mean.. I know lots of guys don't realize some casual misogyny... but it sounds way to much like the "Oh but we Love Jews" I used to get from people in my 20s after some antisemitic crap was said around me. I'm apologising TO YOU. You shouldn't have to deal with that and I wish the shitty world I grew up in in the 80s had gotten a lot better. But You still remain a wonderful person and remember that.
Damn that’s gross. Sorry you went through that. We can be friends if you want. I need girl gamer friends too :(.
Girl I don’t have a pc I’ve got an Xbox but I would be so down to play something ! I need girl gamer friends too I literally only play with my husband. Ditch those guys though fr that sounds terrible to be around
these people/boys sound monstrous, honestly :c so sorry you had to put up with that, girl!
None of my male friends I game with ever bring up any concerns like this because they’re not concerns, it’s just pointless and blatant racism and misogyny. I’m sorry you had to sit thru this, OP. Hopefully you can find some people who don’t waste their time just exuding hate
I think you might want to find another group of friends lol
On behalf of the men I feel sorry
Yeah that's not even a guy problem they're worse than most guys.
No, they aren’t 😂