T O P

  • By -

Intelligent_Pilot360

That will still be good in 1000 years.


SimpleVegetable5715

In a million years even! It's fossil juice.


issafly

Freshly squeezed, relatively.


Hondahobbit50

Well algae, but yea


Isla_Eldar

Dino squeezins


chopstix007

I literally have some at my parents that we got at BiWay in 1993… maybe 1992 since the date of 1993 was when it supposedly expired. I still use it when I go home to visit.


Ganson

Don’t eat it. /s


0002millertime

You actually *can* eat it. That's why people can put it on their lips and butts and wherever else they want. It's totally inert.


crayolakym

Also good to blob a little onto your cats paws, which they'll lick clean, to treat hairballs!!


cbeezy1995

Oh my god this is so much easier than trying to shove it down their throats. Thank you for this revelation!!!


sloppypharah

i


Kiyoko_Mami272821

I’m sorry what??? Tell me more please!?


slogginhog

Greased up cat intestines = no more hairball


crayolakym

It helps safely loosen up any hair from grooming and let's it slide through. Like the tube of hairball treatment you can buy and hope your cat will eat it, except Vaseline on a paw will always be cleaned off 🤌


Kiyoko_Mami272821

That is pretty interesting ty


Poster_Nutbag207

It’s literally petroleum oil it’s good forever


wackyvorlon

Vaseline doesn’t expire.


brassninja

I have vaseline older than this probably


Grand-Name5325

Okay let's put our dicks away gentlemen..


LibertyInaFeatherBed

You mean Vick's?


Grand-Name5325

You're an animal


honorbeepbop

LMAO


Scooby1_Kanooby

But we already got the Vas out…


Grand-Name5325

😂


WETNWILDARLINGTON

The vas deferens got it out.


ProsodyonthePrairie

I have Vaseline older than yours.


chawchat

Mine is way older then yours.


w1gster

It doesn’t expire


SimpleVegetable5715

You know this stuff is made out of dinosaurs, right?


_Ova

ive been jerking it with dino goo???


nous-vibrons

Still fine. We had the same tub of Vaseline in my family for 20 some odd years.


PrincessZebra126

Passed down thru generations I hope


nous-vibrons

If only. It’s apparently the one my parents got when I was a baby and it was used til I was in college.


PrincessZebra126

That's insanely cool!!


MAGAJahnamal

That's how we slide grandpa down to his grave!


SIumptGod

I’d think 50 plus Vaseline would be interesting, but once I saw the Dollar General logo I was like *pshhhh*


nous-vibrons

Funnily enough, my old jar of Vaseline was also Dollar General branded


thewinberry713

Honestly this is probably fine! Frightening as that is! Lol


Chipmunk_Ninja

Why would it be frightening? It's 10 years old, not 50


AlyM797

I don't think it actually expires. After the nuclear apocalypse roaches will be deep frying their Twinkies™️ in that shit or slathering it on their larvas' cuts or something. Edit: spelling


reddogleader

I know a girl who thinks of ghosts, She'll make you breakfast, she'll make you toast. But she don't use butter. And she don't use cheese. She don't use jelly, or any of these.


driguy78

She uses.... Vasssaaline


Classic_Home_2266

I have a tin of Bag Balm from 1993 that I treasure. It was my Grandmother's and I used it my whole life. I use a new tin now because the formula has clearly changed, so the old stuff is for emergency use only.


I_LearnTheHardWay

My bag balm is from 2002 lol! I use it for everything!


xandrachantal

Does it actually expire or isit like how they put an expiration date on pink Himalayan salt despite the fact its thousands of years old


alleecmo

I saw that on mine and laughed and laughed... Been in them mountains *how long* and it's gonna go bad in a year...?


Comfortable_Tap_4816

Vaseline is a brand name of petroleum jelly


emmygog

I think their issue with it is the next slide, meaning the expiration date being nearly ten years ago.


Spiritual_Bit_2692

As long as it doesn't have flies in it ... it's all good.


chickwithabrick

We keep getting stuck here all the time...


ChumpChainge

It doesn’t really expire anyhow. It’s made of petroleum


AlwaysWorried27222

Where's the issue?


TinChalice

That stuff doesn’t expire. Also, the store brand and Vaseline are literally from the same factory.


al_fletcher

Hahaha, 2014 wasn’t so long ago-oh my god


ProsodyonthePrairie

Thinking the same. That sweet, sweet summer child. There’s stuff in my cabinet from the 1900s and I ain’t a granny.


dinnerbird

I started high school in 2014...


Tetragonos

For everyone saying "that stuff dosent expire" you are VERY close. If it was in glass youd be right but plastic containers have a shelf life. We as a civilization dont know WHAT happens to certain types of plastics after X number of years because that particualr plastic has only been around for like 5 years in a lab before hitting the market. So legally speaking, it has to have an expiration date. but safety first, put it in a canning jar and throw away the plastic container and hey presto that wont expire.


Roxy_j_summers

isn’t plastic made from petroleum?


Tetragonos

sometimes, it can also be plant based... it really is about cooking the molcule from a chain of hydrocarbons and my admittedly limited understanding is the longer the hydro carbon the easier and cheaper it is to make stuff out of it... and prime crude oil is the king of long carbon chains. again grain of salt not something I have direct knowledge of


Zazoot

Yeah kind of but accelerated lifetime testing using temperature cycles, humidity and UV allows us to fairly accurately predict decades worth of degradation in very short lengths of time. If it were in a jar it would still have an expiration date but it would likely be another arbitrary one. As far as I know when it comes to stuff like this that doesn't really "expire", there are just a few guidelines for them to follow and it's just up to the manufacturer what they put. Sometimes they'll want you to chuck it and buy another eventually or they might just decide to stick + ten years on it to be safe. Maybe they spent the money on a study for lifetime testing the container but I doubt anyone is forcing them to with this.


Tetragonos

I used to work in food manufacturing and playing with those expiration dates in ANY WAY is a wonderful way to get fines that will drop your stock prices or put you out of business and get a full recall ordered. The FDA dont play


researchanalyzewrite

You are correct. Petroleum jelly, however, isn't food (nor drug I believe).


drweird

More like Moms pantry. 2014 was just a few years ago. Oh wait..... Oh God!


VerbalThermodynamics

It never goes bad.


Capital_Sink6645

this


doesntmatteranyway20

My grandpa has a rusted metal tin of it in his bathroom, this looks brand new by comparison lol


Boodle84

Just realized my tub of petroleum has expiry of 2022 on the bottom lol. I use it everyday for dry lips, works fine.


FunAdministration334

Heck, that’s new. Gimme some!


malemaiden

I've used Vaseline that'd expired before I was born. Probably not the wisest decision because who knows what kind of microplastics from the container could have made their way in, but eh.


bobbobersin

It don't go bad my dude, it's been under the crust of the planet for millions of years


everything_must_end3

Idk.. i feel like affer opening them and sticking your fingers inside of the tub year adter year.. i think it would be impossible to not have some unwanted trapped bacteria in here?? Just my opinion?


SimpleVegetable5715

There's noting for bacteria to live off of in petrolatum.


CourageMesAmies

That’s why I don’t use my fingers. Depending on the purpose, I use * Cotton swab (Q-Tip) * cotton ball * cotton round * cosmetics spatula


No_Bend8

Clean spoon! Lol


TrevorsBlondeLocks16

If i gotta put any where the sun dont shine…disposable gloves lol


waaaayupyourbutthole

I just hate the feeling of stuff like this on my hands, so even when it's *not* going where the sun don't shine, I'm still using disposable gloves lol


TrevorsBlondeLocks16

I feel you on that. Can wash your hands hard as fuck, but you still feel that oil


MungoJennie

Just as an fyi, dishwashing detergent will get it off. Dawn does a particularly good job. (I can’t stand greasy fingers, either.)


Kind-Dentist42

this is Vaseline


KediMonster

That's the good stuff!


WaldenFont

While bottle digging, I’ve found 100-year old Vaseline jars with product still in them. It looked perfectly good to me.


2oblivion2

Great love jelly


Kreaturethenerfer

I have Vaseline from twenty ten, it’s dinosaur bones it’ll be fine for another five million tears


machinemanboosted

I would still send it


bigfoot17

If you ever hate someone enough, put a glob on their windshield.


RE2120

Most houses had this exact one 🤣


RaisinBrain2Scoups

What does one do with this ? On the daily?


Pure-Guard-3633

Same same


emmalovescats22

Pretty young Vaseline


lighthouser41

I probably have some that old or older in the back of the cabinet.


Copper_Kat

Don't complain, it's still good.


Mayipleaseryou

Same freaking thing dude generic brand


JohnExcrement

My husband has a jar from 1978, from when his son was a baby. Still uses it for non skin-related things. I’m sure it’s got to be swimming with god knows what.


Chipmunk_Ninja

Semen


Chipmunk_Ninja

Why would someone need so much vasoline?


UnwillingHummingbird

LOL, I have this exact same jar and I'm still using it. I need to check how old it is...


astrobleeem

I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s Vaseline in our house from the 80s


mind_the_umlaut

I don't think that vaseline can expire.


BrianLevre

Looks like Granny hasn't been doing much anal then.