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DoctorMedieval

He was famous for the length of his beard.


Diacetyl-Morphin

And for some unknown reason, his beard didn't end up in a glass jar in a museum...


XConfused-MammalX

That's a myth, it's not the real thing, the royals kept it uhhh...for reasons.


BoringStatement7337

A healthy snack?.


XConfused-MammalX

Pickled, so it's low calorie too!


SavageFractalGarden

Russia’s greatest love machine


DamWatermelonEnjoyer

Ra - ra - Rasputin


BlueThespian

Lover of the Russian queen


bananasaucecer

There was a cat that really was gone


ryzxwa2307

Ra ra Rasputin


PanderII

Russia's greatest love machine


underdog-_-2

It was a shame how he carried on


Narco_Marcion1075

He ruled the Russian land and never mind the Czar 


RockAndGem1101

But the kazakhchok, he danced really wunderbar


Retsyo_Dosqko

In all affairs of state he was the man to please


smartdude_x13m

Don't worry I'll find that cat...


Exotic-Cartoonist816

RaspberryPutin


Tahquil

The kind you buy in a second-hand store


Hypnotic-Flamingo

I buried Paul (Only a vert specific niche of people will understand, I'll patiently wait for them)


francino_meow

There really was a cat that was gone


AdventurousPrint835

It was a shame how he carried on


ryzxwa2307

They put some poison into his wine


Hamblerger

It just immediately started playing in my head the moment this hit my eyes


n_with

r/beatmetoit


V3gasMan

Probably something else if said rumors about something else are true


Lairdicus

I think you transcend “rumor” when your giant hog is preserved in a pickle jar in a Russian museum


sarcasticd0nkey

r/BrandNewSentence


V3gasMan

😂


HereticLaserHaggis

The penis so good the nation kept it after it killed you.


space-time-invader

Once he found the clit everything else was black magic


Archmagos_Browning

“Rasputin quickly gained the envy of women across the globe after he became the first man in history to give a woman an orgasm.”


Least_Spare_2988

Stop spreading lies,we all know that female orgasm is a myth.


Sandstorm1020

Underrated and likely most accurate comment.


maxrhysruffels

You hear a lot about his eyes, as well as his other endowments…


DSIR1

13 inch apparently in English 33cm


Goatymcgoatface11

Flacid? Cuz holy fucking shit. At that point you'd think it'd just hurt


moogleman844

So roughly 20 inch erect?


feedmedamemes

Unlikely, such large members usually don't grow that much in size. Maybe 1-2 inches. Which would still put him in the man-horse category.


moogleman844

Also do we know the girth?


maxrhysruffels

Those are some big eyes


HereforDistractable

Wait really?


Speedwagon1738

His magnum dong was probably part of it


K177C0D3

They put it in a monster jar.


GerrardGabrielGeralt

I think he was like any other average cult leader, that is - he was very charismatic and charming. Combine that with crazy ideology, and you're good to go


Beneficial_Swing487

There lived a certain man in Russia long ago


___mba___

He was big and strong, in his eyes a flaming glow!


beefyminotour

As all accounts show no the Russian noble family was not very attracted to him.


Hammerschatten

The ways her memoirs are written the maid probably was. It also didn't help that he was overall pretty popular with Ladies, even if the royal family only kept him around for their son


Archaon0103

The royal family liked him because the royal family didn't have many friends in the Russian nobilities due to the empress was an introvert and a foreigner in Russia. Plus he helped their only son with his disease.


DaraVelour

only the emperor, empress and princesses Milica and Anastasia of Montenegro, married into Romanov family; most of Romanovs hated him


Strange-Mouse-8710

Russia had an imperial family not a royal family. And its a myth that he had any relationship with any of the members of the imperial family. He did have affairs with Russian nobles, but not with the imperial family.


Mricantthinkofnothin

Russia's greatest love machine.


harasume

Fun fact, Rasputin's grandchildren were alive and living in the US when Boney M released his Rasputin song.


ancirus

profound mental retardation


DerRaumdenker

He surely satisfied the royal family with his services... like treating the young prince


Giannis1982

It was priapism and pornstar like anatomy


Nahchoocheese

I’m sure the grooming and hypnotism had nothing todo with it


-imivan-

The BWC got them


Christ14an

Rararara come on come on! I want your ugly and I want your disease I want your everything as long as it’s free I want your love…


Vector-Spector

You're all joking about his dick but most modern historians and even people in the family said at the time is what he was doing was manipulation and rape you sickos


Aharmlessme11

Now where did that cat go?


lodi713

Royalty… it was the money n power


Reasonable-Log-3486

No, it was his cock.


FakeElectionMaker

I was just listening to the Boney M song about him on YouTube


League-of-no-dads

Ra Ra Rasputin.


___mba___

Lover of the russian queen 🎶


Evil_duckLord

Can't blame them . The man is irresistible .


Andresito_de_chill

Ra Ra Rasputin-


Lumpen_anus

No one mentioned filthy?


petranxn

No poison can stop him,no royalty can resist his big(maybe huge) charm.


biglyorbigleague

To Moscow chicks he was such a lovely dear


DaraVelour

except most of the Romanov family hated him, it was the princesses of Montenegro married into Romanovs that brought Rasputin into court


DRose23805

Not just the royal family but many of the noblewomen, peasants, etc. Apparently he was very hedonistic and free spending on booze with the money people gave him. That probably explains a lot of that. The noblewomen probably liked him because he was such a smelly (literally) and vile person that he upset their husbands terribly.


ProShyGuy

Ras with the riz.


karoshikun

say what you want about his humongous... beard, but in the photo with the tzarina he looks like a terminal junkie.


Hypnotic-Flamingo

[But to Moscow chicks, he was such a lovely deər.](https://images.app.goo.gl/9Kgj9eK2gx4J7dga6)


Ov3r-_-K1LL

🍆


IllustratorNo3379

The eyes...


malayshallriseagain

He was definitely doing some black magic shit.


RockyFast

Ra Ra Rasputin Lover of the Russian Queen, There was a cat that really was gone Ra-ra Rasputin Russia's greatest love machine It was a shame how he carried on, i love this song


BayrischerBlauKatze

As a gay man I do not see the appeal


Karkax

Fame


BigoteMexicano

I'm guessing he was tall. Even today, women will often ignore a proportionate amount of red flags based on inches over 6'


Worried_Onion4208

The really inbred Russian royal family is known for his ethnic diversity.


asmeile

I mean the dude was straight up raping them though


Impossible_Serve7405

They wanted beard kisses.


BayrischerBlauKatze

As a gay man I do not see the appeal


Brilliant-Escape-245

He really looks scary


TheEndCraft

It was the beard. Absoloutly


cheesyduck32

Where is Alexander the 3rd


atxarchitect91

his cock is pickled in a jar in a museum in Russia (why they cut it off and kept it is a good question considering how he died) and it explains all


[deleted]

[удалено]


polysnip

The man never showered and he was swimming in bitches.


inEGGsperienced

I will never understand strait women


Ron_Bird

tested it, nope its only because hes russ