How have so many people on this thread got it so twisted?!
A vasectomy is usually part of great family planning. You have your kids and then you lock it down so you don’t have any little surprises that would rock the boat too hard.
Ordinarily, unless the man has children and is of a certain age, the procedure won’t be approved.
This couple are celebrating being able to enjoy their marriage without the risk of additional life-long financial responsibility.
"I agree with the contents of the picture's message but find I don't like that people find humour and have fun in their personal lives and with their loved ones"
The fact that I think it’s cringey doesn’t mean it bothers me so much. I don’t really gaf what people do and they’re entitled to do what they want just like I’m entitled to think it’s cringe.
I have never seen more (probably childless) people freaking out about what is probably a very good life decision than this sort of virtue signal reddit post. Anyone married with children knows that when you're done having kids, you're done for good. No sense in introducing a sense of risk that's not necessary and detracts from your overall life enjoyment.
Also vasectomies are reversible (with effort), so its not like the original OP had their balls removed.
>Ordinarily, unless the man has children and is of a certain age, the procedure won’t be approved.
I hope the presence of genetically transmissible conditions is a reason to make an exception, for my own sake.
Back in 2017 JP spaces, particularly irl ones, used to be filled with actual intellectuals. I remember having some great conversations with them and there were even women there.
Now it’s all internet degenerates who have some false sense of traditionalism without understanding any of the principles behind them. This is a couple just living their life. Usually they already have kids and don’t want more. Perfectly reasonable choice.
Absolutely nothing about this threatens the family structure unless you want people to raise accidental kids they didn’t want, which is just twisted.
What makes you think this? I don't see many people here claiming that they're involuntarily celibate -- as in, unable to enter romantic relationships with women.
Alright. I do too, and I don't see people talking about their perpetual failures with women on this subreddit. Now please don't be dense and answer the question you know I'm asking you.
That’s a great question.
I’m not quite sure. My understanding is that a hysterectomy is very invasive and much more serious.
I suppose for that reason, the cookies don’t really fit. What’s your take on it?
Hysterectomy is not the only way of sterilizing a female. They can have their tubes tied. So again I ask. If a husband had cookies made with Fallopian tubes being severed and ones that said Eggs with an X through it, would you be ok with that? I suspect an overwhelming majority would take great issue with it. Even though at face value there’s not much difference at all.
It’s not about how invasive of a procedure is or not. It’s just in today’s society it’s perfectly acceptable for men and masculinity to be degraded, mocked, dismissed, shamed, or any other way you can think of it.
If that was me and I chose to have a vasectomy and my wife had those cookies made, I’d throw them in the trash and probably leave her.
I see what you’re saying.
It’s pretty common place for men in my country to have the procedure after having a family and there isn’t any taboo or suggestions of emasculation attached to it, so maybe it’s a cultural difference.
I suppose the cookies depend on the couple and I took it as being an in joke and good hearted.
When my wife was pregnant it was a joke between us for me to call her a “big fat pig” (I promise it was not abusive in any way) but when a passerby overheard this in public you should have seen the look on their face!
Someone having the procedure is one thing. They should do as they wish. I’m in no place to really tell anyone else what they should be doing in that regard. As long as they aren’t hurting anyone else.
I view this just the same double standard that exists with all the LGHDTV+ garbage. Society tolerates these people having an entire month of rubbing it in everyone faces what their sexual proclivities are. Tax dollars are spent on it, etc….
If I went around demanding everyone hear about how I’m a heterosexual male and I like to have sex with women I’d be public enemy number one. It’s a double standard and at this point it’s no longer funny or cute. It’s annoying, insufferable, and in a lot of cases flat out offensive.
I’m surprised you’re allowed to say this without getting downvoted to hell.
Even the subs that appear would get traction from moderate to right perspectives seem to be overrun with extremism.
As someone who has a wife that while for unfortunate reasons, is 100% incapable of getting pregnant... yeah not having to worry about condoms or anything is great.
it really isn't. you have to get a test to make sure it took, and periodically after that to make sure it hasn't undone itself. which apparently happens pretty readily.
This is perfectly acceptable. I would rather someone be voluntarily sterilized as a form of birth control than have someone use abortions as birth control.
>does birthcontrol
>avoids abortions
>his own choice and doesn't impact others
>the sub:
"And thus how a man is made into a joystick."
"Cuckies"
"Malthus 🤝 Mephistopheles"
"Individualism vs collectivism"
this sub is beginning to suck.
I only wanted 1 kid. Had our kid, when he was healthy and past any major points of risk, I got a vasectomy. This was my choice and a choice between my wife and I.
The fact that some dudes on here think this is some sort of level of demarcation and control is fucking hilarious. Simp mentality at best.
My wife and I have great consequence free sex whenever the fuck we want and there is nothing better than knowing that. We have a happy family that is full.
We decided we were ok with our kid being an only child. We never intended to be parents any way and took the necessary precautions but nature found a way. We also had our first child at 35 and were pushing 38 at this point. Was going to schedule the vasectomy but 2 weeks later, despite the precautions, we were pregnant with our second. Got the vasectomy the week after she was born.
you think we'll be relying on human labor in 30+ years?
also theres a fair chance we'll be able to live as long as we want within the next 20-ish years as well. reproduction is not a serious issue.
Huh? You got some thin-skin there bud. They’re having a goof at his expense. They prolly have a great relationship by the looks of it. Not everything is a threat to your masculinity.
Great so y'all are against abortions, sure...but if the man gets a vasectomy to prevent those abortions from happening in the first place, y'all will still cry. Go on. Make a joke out of yourselves.
vasectomies are reversible... but even if the man is ok with it being a permanent decision, why should it matter to anyone else then? He's happy, his wife is happy, everyone is happy. How is it pressing you?
Based on the quantity of these posts in r/daddit, I'm guessing pretty low. These are mostly celebrations from people who have already been through the trenches and don't want to go back.
That's a silly thing to assert.
Not everyone experiences the world the same and it's absolutely possible to not want children without having a mental illness.
In fact I'd say it's a pretty rational thing to feel.
Can you elaborate on why you feel that way?
Because to me bending to the genetic drive to personally reproduce is what's narcissistic.
Speaking personally, ALL drive for reproduction is absolutely satiated by my participation in my nieces/nephews' lives. There wasn't much there before that, but what was there was satisfied in being an uncle.
To me, the idea of NEEDING to have kids with MY genetics in particular is almost obscenely vain.
People who say they don’t want kids are attempting to override their natural desire to procreate with narcissistic ideas of less responsibility and personal time.
It is not vanity to want to have children. This is a twisted perspective.
>People who say they don’t want kids are attempting to override their natural desire to procreate with narcissistic ideas of less responsibility and personal time.
I am telling you that at least some portion of the time, (speaking from personal experience) that this is incorrect.
the thing is I've spent what I would speculate is a more significant time thinking about this than most people. Why? because what is now quite a long time ago, my (now) wife had to have a partial hysterectomy due to essentially a genetic condition. there were \*no\* remaining options. Now, she had her own list of reasons that she hadn't wanted kids since she basically learned about how it all works, and thats mostly her own story to tell. but being the supporting partner in that situation made me have to think about how I felt at a deeper level than I had previously. and thats been a continuous point of consideration when for example I gain a new niece or nephew, or, and I have no doubt to your ire, participating in raising a litter of kittens.
Before I had to confront the issue seriously, I had \*assumed\* I would have kids, but I never really put much thought into it. that event forced me to seriously think about it and how I felt about it. and the fact is that I never really WANTED kids, or cared about having kids. if you want to go spiritual about it, perhaps I knew to start with that I wouldn't be having kids since the woman I'd have wanted to have kids with wouldn't be able to.
If I seriously and thoughtfully look inside and think "but wouldn't it be nice to have a kid that I helped make, a little half me half my wife person?" and basically besides figurative crickets... the answer basically boils down to "intellectually I know I'm supposed to... but no not really" I can look at the things my siblings go through with their kids. sure theres a lot of good bits. but theres also a lot of things that seem like basically a nightmare to me. and helping raise a litter of kittens... as totally different as that is to an actual kid... holy shit no. I just couldn't do it. and the idea is existentially dreadful to me. I \*really\* sincerely hate the idea. I am not even sure where I'd look to try to find the "natural desire to procreate" that you think is in there to be overridden.
how would it not be vanity for me to highly value having kids that are specifically mine rather than merely focusing on contributing to my nieces and nephews? they are essentially as related to me as hypothetical grandkids would be. why should I value \*my\* 1/2 of each of my parents' genes over my siblings' 1/2 of each of my parents? how is that not vain?
additionally, I can be much more useful as an uncle than I would be as a father. I don't think I'd be all that good of a father, or realistically able to provide a particularly good setting for a kid. but i can definitely be an Uncle. I think the lesser contribution as an Uncle is a far more useful one and one that I don't need to kill myself in order to give.
I thought the same way as you until I had my children. I didn't have my children until I was 35 so I was pretty sure I was never having any and I was very much ok with it. Truth is, Parents piss and moan about all the things they have to do but I think many of us love it. The one thing most parents can agree on is it goes so fast. Nobody knows how to be a parent until they are put into the situation. You say you wouldn't be a good father. The first couple of years is feeding them, changing them, and interacting. You just have to be present. Any one can do it. If you're capable of doing that, you're just building off of that.
... no you aren't?
Like you know the balls are still there and doing what they do, the tube that let's the sperm out is just cut. Just that. Nothing else.
Edit: and as a detail castration doesn't imply removing the penis to begin with either.
That’s literally what I said. You’re castrating yourself while keeping the genitals. You still can’t control yourself and so you need to do this. This is like if a guy was promoting jumping off a building, I said that you’re going to die and end as a pancake consisting of blood, meat and organs on the ground and your argument for it being fine is that you’re still going to be mostly together. The guy who would jump off the building is still going to die. OOP still needs to stop himself from having children by force because he can’t control himself like an animal
So I guess you are confused about what castration is more than about what vasectomy is?
>You still can’t control yourself and so you need to do this.
Vasectomy doesn't effect anything to do with self control?
>OOP still needs to stop himself from having children by force because he can’t control himself like an animal
.... no? Because he probably has all the children he wants and doesn't need the ability to make more, and it would be beneficial to not have to be concerned with it.
What is the benefit to not getting a vasectomy if you are sure you don't want more kids?
I am saying that this is the kind of action you do with an animal which can’t control himself. OOP is dehumanizing and humiliating himself and is celebrating the process
Bro, its a GOOD thing to want to have sex with your wife. That's part of a healthy marriage. Having more kids than you want is not healthy. Forcing yourself not to be intimate with your wife (and forcing the reciprocal on her) is also not healthy.
Because we all share one society. Nothing we accomplish can exist without other’s sacrifices: parents, teachers, family, businesspeople, and so many others. You owe the same to others.
You also owe it to yourself to be the best version of yourself, which you can only do when you put aside easy and pleasurable things and do things that challenge and change yourself.
>You owe the same to others.
I disagree. Those other things aren't transactional. To make them transactional greatly degrades their merit.
>You also owe it to yourself to be the best version of yourself, which you can only do when you put aside easy and pleasurable things and do things that challenge and change yourself.
In so far as that's true, IMO, that doesn't lead to having to make sacrifices for society. That's a competition within myself that's my business.
Man is not an island. It’s true that these things aren’t transactional in some legalistic sense which makes you it imperative that you do certain things or take specific actions. It is, however, true that it is morally good to take actions that sacrifice your enjoyment because you should want to pay whatever you’ve received in life (however small you think your advantages are) forward. You ought to train your desires to this end to the extent that’s they are none naturally aligned with it.
>It is, however, true that it is morally good to take actions that sacrifice your enjoyment because you should want to pay whatever you’ve received in life (however small you think your advantages are) forward.
I can do that infinitely more effectively as an Uncle than as a parent. even if being a parent was an option for me (it isn't).
>You ought to train your desires to this end to the extent that’s they are none naturally aligned with it.
that is a reasonable and sensible path to take. but it is not the only option.
What if someone is very poor and don't want their children to suffer?
What is someone has genetic illnes which he doesn't want to give to their children?
For example I live in an antidemocratic Eastern-European country and things getting more and more dangerous every day. We don't even have teachers on schools... I feel like for me the right moral decision would be to not have children. But I really want children but I feel like it would be immoral to raise them here. Basically I'm training my desires with not having children because I want children.
>does birthcontrol
>avoids abortions
>his own choice and doesn't impact others
>the sub:
"And thus how a man is made into a joystick."
"Cuckies"
"Malthus 🤝 Mephistopheles"
"Individualism vs collectivism"
this sub is beginning to suck.
Here’s my radical thesis: if you have the money and both partners are mentally stable, you should consider having kids.
If you don’t have the resources or either party is mentally unstable, you should think deeply about the implications.
The world would actually be much better this way, populate it with healthy wealthy kids, get rid of all the lineages that are broken.
do you even know how a vasectomy works? they don't take away your balls, just the pipe is cut off so that sperm doesn't enter into your ejaculate. You will still be making sperm and testosterone, you aren't "neutered" as such. Vasectomies can be reversed too depending on the timeline and you can get back to your old self.
Everyone has their own situation and relationship (or lack thereof) with the divine.
Personally I don't feel that way because my circumstances were such that "god" finalized my not being meant to have kids in a clear way right in front of me. Which makes it rather easy in a way.
Same. I might say mentally instead of spiritually but yeah. I have two kids, don’t necessarily want any more. It would be nice not to worry about it, but, I think knowing I’m technically sterile would lower my sex drive and take some of the pleasure out of it. Sex is mostly mental.
Bro probably already had the kids he and his wife wanted and is now taking the burden of birth control from her. That's almost exclusively when and why dudes get vasectomies
How have so many people on this thread got it so twisted?! A vasectomy is usually part of great family planning. You have your kids and then you lock it down so you don’t have any little surprises that would rock the boat too hard. Ordinarily, unless the man has children and is of a certain age, the procedure won’t be approved. This couple are celebrating being able to enjoy their marriage without the risk of additional life-long financial responsibility.
Think for like 30 seconds about the people who comment in this sub regularly, and that answers your first question.
I agree with the vasectomy as it makes complete sense once you’re done having children but the cookies are just so cringey
"I agree with the contents of the picture's message but find I don't like that people find humour and have fun in their personal lives and with their loved ones"
I wonder what the colonoscopy cookies look like
😂 or hysterectomy cookies. So weird.
Why cringey? I found them pretty funny. And why does it bother you so much that his wife made him cookies??
The fact that I think it’s cringey doesn’t mean it bothers me so much. I don’t really gaf what people do and they’re entitled to do what they want just like I’m entitled to think it’s cringe.
We know you’re entitled to your opinion. They were asking why you felt that way.
I have never seen more (probably childless) people freaking out about what is probably a very good life decision than this sort of virtue signal reddit post. Anyone married with children knows that when you're done having kids, you're done for good. No sense in introducing a sense of risk that's not necessary and detracts from your overall life enjoyment. Also vasectomies are reversible (with effort), so its not like the original OP had their balls removed.
>Ordinarily, unless the man has children and is of a certain age, the procedure won’t be approved. I hope the presence of genetically transmissible conditions is a reason to make an exception, for my own sake.
This sub is mostly incels. It’s not a message they’re receiving
Back in 2017 JP spaces, particularly irl ones, used to be filled with actual intellectuals. I remember having some great conversations with them and there were even women there. Now it’s all internet degenerates who have some false sense of traditionalism without understanding any of the principles behind them. This is a couple just living their life. Usually they already have kids and don’t want more. Perfectly reasonable choice. Absolutely nothing about this threatens the family structure unless you want people to raise accidental kids they didn’t want, which is just twisted.
TIL making fun of clowns who snap their balls means that u're an incel.
What about having sex without leaving an endless stream of unwanted children makes a man a clown?
He clearly hasn't had sex enough. B/c the difference between leaving it in vs pulling it out is reason enough to consider it imo
i think u are reading some weird fanfic or something
Yep
Better to be an incel than incontinent I would say
That’s… not what’s vasectomy is
I wasn't referring to vasectomies
Then you’ve lost the plot.
No just pointing out something funny is all, those who get what I'm saying will find it quite amusing as well
What makes you think this? I don't see many people here claiming that they're involuntarily celibate -- as in, unable to enter romantic relationships with women.
I have eyes
Alright. I do too, and I don't see people talking about their perpetual failures with women on this subreddit. Now please don't be dense and answer the question you know I'm asking you.
If the cookies were made in celebration of a female being sterilized would you have the same take on it?
That’s a great question. I’m not quite sure. My understanding is that a hysterectomy is very invasive and much more serious. I suppose for that reason, the cookies don’t really fit. What’s your take on it?
Hysterectomy is not the only way of sterilizing a female. They can have their tubes tied. So again I ask. If a husband had cookies made with Fallopian tubes being severed and ones that said Eggs with an X through it, would you be ok with that? I suspect an overwhelming majority would take great issue with it. Even though at face value there’s not much difference at all. It’s not about how invasive of a procedure is or not. It’s just in today’s society it’s perfectly acceptable for men and masculinity to be degraded, mocked, dismissed, shamed, or any other way you can think of it. If that was me and I chose to have a vasectomy and my wife had those cookies made, I’d throw them in the trash and probably leave her.
I see what you’re saying. It’s pretty common place for men in my country to have the procedure after having a family and there isn’t any taboo or suggestions of emasculation attached to it, so maybe it’s a cultural difference. I suppose the cookies depend on the couple and I took it as being an in joke and good hearted. When my wife was pregnant it was a joke between us for me to call her a “big fat pig” (I promise it was not abusive in any way) but when a passerby overheard this in public you should have seen the look on their face!
Someone having the procedure is one thing. They should do as they wish. I’m in no place to really tell anyone else what they should be doing in that regard. As long as they aren’t hurting anyone else. I view this just the same double standard that exists with all the LGHDTV+ garbage. Society tolerates these people having an entire month of rubbing it in everyone faces what their sexual proclivities are. Tax dollars are spent on it, etc…. If I went around demanding everyone hear about how I’m a heterosexual male and I like to have sex with women I’d be public enemy number one. It’s a double standard and at this point it’s no longer funny or cute. It’s annoying, insufferable, and in a lot of cases flat out offensive.
[удалено]
so which one are you?
a bot
I’m surprised you’re allowed to say this without getting downvoted to hell. Even the subs that appear would get traction from moderate to right perspectives seem to be overrun with extremism.
[удалено]
Yep, I thought they would fun interesting subs to talk about these guys, but nope.
Cuckies
😂
Creampies for life sounds pretty good bro
As someone who has a wife that while for unfortunate reasons, is 100% incapable of getting pregnant... yeah not having to worry about condoms or anything is great.
Yeah, my brother-in-law got a vasectomy and my sister ended up getting pregnant…! So apparently it’s not bulletproof.
Did the bro get a paternity test?
Not my business
it really isn't. you have to get a test to make sure it took, and periodically after that to make sure it hasn't undone itself. which apparently happens pretty readily.
This is perfectly acceptable. I would rather someone be voluntarily sterilized as a form of birth control than have someone use abortions as birth control.
>does birthcontrol >avoids abortions >his own choice and doesn't impact others >the sub: "And thus how a man is made into a joystick." "Cuckies" "Malthus 🤝 Mephistopheles" "Individualism vs collectivism" this sub is beginning to suck.
> this sub is beginning to suck. Beginning??? It's been like this for many years.
But killing babies is fun
I only wanted 1 kid. Had our kid, when he was healthy and past any major points of risk, I got a vasectomy. This was my choice and a choice between my wife and I. The fact that some dudes on here think this is some sort of level of demarcation and control is fucking hilarious. Simp mentality at best. My wife and I have great consequence free sex whenever the fuck we want and there is nothing better than knowing that. We have a happy family that is full.
We decided we were ok with our kid being an only child. We never intended to be parents any way and took the necessary precautions but nature found a way. We also had our first child at 35 and were pushing 38 at this point. Was going to schedule the vasectomy but 2 weeks later, despite the precautions, we were pregnant with our second. Got the vasectomy the week after she was born.
Have fun not being at replacement levels bro. Who’s gonna fund your SSI?
you think we'll be relying on human labor in 30+ years? also theres a fair chance we'll be able to live as long as we want within the next 20-ish years as well. reproduction is not a serious issue.
This option is WAY better than the abortion.
what the hell is wrong with having a vasectomy?
Apparently we all need to be like Elon and have IVF kids without getting laid. They are the true winners of the world.
Maybe I’m reading too much into it. But this comes across as pretty emasculating. Kinda crazy tbh.
I think that heavily depends on the dynamics and sense of humor in the relationship. I think it could go either way depending on the people involved.
Yeah that’s completely fair
Huh? You got some thin-skin there bud. They’re having a goof at his expense. They prolly have a great relationship by the looks of it. Not everything is a threat to your masculinity.
Fellas, is it gay if your wife makes cookies for you and asks you to bang her???
Nothing feels more emasculating than a “creampies for life” cookie
You must have a terrible imagination.
Triggered 🤡
"My wife had cookies made to celebrate my vasectomy." And thus how a man is made into a joystick.
Can people not celebrate choices that will make some positive things easier?
Great so y'all are against abortions, sure...but if the man gets a vasectomy to prevent those abortions from happening in the first place, y'all will still cry. Go on. Make a joke out of yourselves.
No, not us all are against abortion. There are far less permanent ways to avoid pregnancies
vasectomies are reversible... but even if the man is ok with it being a permanent decision, why should it matter to anyone else then? He's happy, his wife is happy, everyone is happy. How is it pressing you?
Not all are and it gets less likely the longer it goes.
yes. but the question still remains. why/how does it bother you if the man himself is ok with it being a permanent decision?
I never said it did
I'll be looking forward to that, personally.
Good for you
What are the chances they didn't have kids?
Pretty low. I see these types of things pop up for people who already have multiple kids. That's why they turn it into a fun event.
Based on the quantity of these posts in r/daddit, I'm guessing pretty low. These are mostly celebrations from people who have already been through the trenches and don't want to go back.
Its ok to not what kids.
People I know that have had a vasectomy have already had all the kids they want tbf
False
why false?
There’s nothing good about it. It’s a biological imperative. If you don’t desire children you have mental illness.
That's a silly thing to assert. Not everyone experiences the world the same and it's absolutely possible to not want children without having a mental illness. In fact I'd say it's a pretty rational thing to feel.
Most people decide they don't want them after they had them.
It’s not rational at all. It’s entirely narcissistic.
Can you elaborate on why you feel that way? Because to me bending to the genetic drive to personally reproduce is what's narcissistic. Speaking personally, ALL drive for reproduction is absolutely satiated by my participation in my nieces/nephews' lives. There wasn't much there before that, but what was there was satisfied in being an uncle. To me, the idea of NEEDING to have kids with MY genetics in particular is almost obscenely vain.
People who say they don’t want kids are attempting to override their natural desire to procreate with narcissistic ideas of less responsibility and personal time. It is not vanity to want to have children. This is a twisted perspective.
Overriding natural desires is usually just called self control.
That’s like saying starving yourself is self-control. You people have a completely warped sense of reality
>People who say they don’t want kids are attempting to override their natural desire to procreate with narcissistic ideas of less responsibility and personal time. I am telling you that at least some portion of the time, (speaking from personal experience) that this is incorrect. the thing is I've spent what I would speculate is a more significant time thinking about this than most people. Why? because what is now quite a long time ago, my (now) wife had to have a partial hysterectomy due to essentially a genetic condition. there were \*no\* remaining options. Now, she had her own list of reasons that she hadn't wanted kids since she basically learned about how it all works, and thats mostly her own story to tell. but being the supporting partner in that situation made me have to think about how I felt at a deeper level than I had previously. and thats been a continuous point of consideration when for example I gain a new niece or nephew, or, and I have no doubt to your ire, participating in raising a litter of kittens. Before I had to confront the issue seriously, I had \*assumed\* I would have kids, but I never really put much thought into it. that event forced me to seriously think about it and how I felt about it. and the fact is that I never really WANTED kids, or cared about having kids. if you want to go spiritual about it, perhaps I knew to start with that I wouldn't be having kids since the woman I'd have wanted to have kids with wouldn't be able to. If I seriously and thoughtfully look inside and think "but wouldn't it be nice to have a kid that I helped make, a little half me half my wife person?" and basically besides figurative crickets... the answer basically boils down to "intellectually I know I'm supposed to... but no not really" I can look at the things my siblings go through with their kids. sure theres a lot of good bits. but theres also a lot of things that seem like basically a nightmare to me. and helping raise a litter of kittens... as totally different as that is to an actual kid... holy shit no. I just couldn't do it. and the idea is existentially dreadful to me. I \*really\* sincerely hate the idea. I am not even sure where I'd look to try to find the "natural desire to procreate" that you think is in there to be overridden. how would it not be vanity for me to highly value having kids that are specifically mine rather than merely focusing on contributing to my nieces and nephews? they are essentially as related to me as hypothetical grandkids would be. why should I value \*my\* 1/2 of each of my parents' genes over my siblings' 1/2 of each of my parents? how is that not vain? additionally, I can be much more useful as an uncle than I would be as a father. I don't think I'd be all that good of a father, or realistically able to provide a particularly good setting for a kid. but i can definitely be an Uncle. I think the lesser contribution as an Uncle is a far more useful one and one that I don't need to kill myself in order to give.
I thought the same way as you until I had my children. I didn't have my children until I was 35 so I was pretty sure I was never having any and I was very much ok with it. Truth is, Parents piss and moan about all the things they have to do but I think many of us love it. The one thing most parents can agree on is it goes so fast. Nobody knows how to be a parent until they are put into the situation. You say you wouldn't be a good father. The first couple of years is feeding them, changing them, and interacting. You just have to be present. Any one can do it. If you're capable of doing that, you're just building off of that.
But these people don’t have to neuter themselves like you’d neuter a dog. Can they not control themselves?
Are you sure you know what a vasectomy is?
“Oh, it’s not a literal castration, you still get to keep your cock.” That’s your argument. You’re still castrating yourself
... no you aren't? Like you know the balls are still there and doing what they do, the tube that let's the sperm out is just cut. Just that. Nothing else. Edit: and as a detail castration doesn't imply removing the penis to begin with either.
That’s literally what I said. You’re castrating yourself while keeping the genitals. You still can’t control yourself and so you need to do this. This is like if a guy was promoting jumping off a building, I said that you’re going to die and end as a pancake consisting of blood, meat and organs on the ground and your argument for it being fine is that you’re still going to be mostly together. The guy who would jump off the building is still going to die. OOP still needs to stop himself from having children by force because he can’t control himself like an animal
So I guess you are confused about what castration is more than about what vasectomy is? >You still can’t control yourself and so you need to do this. Vasectomy doesn't effect anything to do with self control? >OOP still needs to stop himself from having children by force because he can’t control himself like an animal .... no? Because he probably has all the children he wants and doesn't need the ability to make more, and it would be beneficial to not have to be concerned with it. What is the benefit to not getting a vasectomy if you are sure you don't want more kids?
I am saying that this is the kind of action you do with an animal which can’t control himself. OOP is dehumanizing and humiliating himself and is celebrating the process
How is this dehumanizing and humiliating? Do you think that placing a spiral/IUD in a woman is dehumanizing and humiliating?
Bro, its a GOOD thing to want to have sex with your wife. That's part of a healthy marriage. Having more kids than you want is not healthy. Forcing yourself not to be intimate with your wife (and forcing the reciprocal on her) is also not healthy.
Do you think it's bad to want to have sex with your spouse but not want more kids?
As long as you do something equally additive for society that requires similar degree of sacrifice.
Why? What leads you to feel that people have such a debt in that way?
Because we all share one society. Nothing we accomplish can exist without other’s sacrifices: parents, teachers, family, businesspeople, and so many others. You owe the same to others. You also owe it to yourself to be the best version of yourself, which you can only do when you put aside easy and pleasurable things and do things that challenge and change yourself.
>You owe the same to others. I disagree. Those other things aren't transactional. To make them transactional greatly degrades their merit. >You also owe it to yourself to be the best version of yourself, which you can only do when you put aside easy and pleasurable things and do things that challenge and change yourself. In so far as that's true, IMO, that doesn't lead to having to make sacrifices for society. That's a competition within myself that's my business.
Man is not an island. It’s true that these things aren’t transactional in some legalistic sense which makes you it imperative that you do certain things or take specific actions. It is, however, true that it is morally good to take actions that sacrifice your enjoyment because you should want to pay whatever you’ve received in life (however small you think your advantages are) forward. You ought to train your desires to this end to the extent that’s they are none naturally aligned with it.
>It is, however, true that it is morally good to take actions that sacrifice your enjoyment because you should want to pay whatever you’ve received in life (however small you think your advantages are) forward. I can do that infinitely more effectively as an Uncle than as a parent. even if being a parent was an option for me (it isn't). >You ought to train your desires to this end to the extent that’s they are none naturally aligned with it. that is a reasonable and sensible path to take. but it is not the only option.
What if someone is very poor and don't want their children to suffer? What is someone has genetic illnes which he doesn't want to give to their children? For example I live in an antidemocratic Eastern-European country and things getting more and more dangerous every day. We don't even have teachers on schools... I feel like for me the right moral decision would be to not have children. But I really want children but I feel like it would be immoral to raise them here. Basically I'm training my desires with not having children because I want children.
>does birthcontrol >avoids abortions >his own choice and doesn't impact others >the sub: "And thus how a man is made into a joystick." "Cuckies" "Malthus 🤝 Mephistopheles" "Individualism vs collectivism" this sub is beginning to suck.
Here’s my radical thesis: if you have the money and both partners are mentally stable, you should consider having kids. If you don’t have the resources or either party is mentally unstable, you should think deeply about the implications. The world would actually be much better this way, populate it with healthy wealthy kids, get rid of all the lineages that are broken.
Tbf their quite funny but this is Reddit so I guess they’re being a lot more serious than they should be
>*”straight outta sperm”* Classic
Couples have vasectomies when their kids have grown somewhat and they don't want to have any more surprises.
Vasectomy is a free pass to bang whomever.
I’ve wanted one, but I’d feel neutered, both physically and more importantly, spiritually.
do you even know how a vasectomy works? they don't take away your balls, just the pipe is cut off so that sperm doesn't enter into your ejaculate. You will still be making sperm and testosterone, you aren't "neutered" as such. Vasectomies can be reversed too depending on the timeline and you can get back to your old self.
The pee is in the balls right ?
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But it is basic highschool memology:(
Honestly, I totally get this.
spiritually?
I’d say it goes against the relationship I have with God. I don’t think He approves of it for me.
Everyone has their own situation and relationship (or lack thereof) with the divine. Personally I don't feel that way because my circumstances were such that "god" finalized my not being meant to have kids in a clear way right in front of me. Which makes it rather easy in a way.
I hear you loud and clear. I just figure this is the way He made me, who am I to alter it?
So you're against circumcision also?
In the other hand he gave it to you and it's yours. Why not customize it to your liking?
Sure, why not chop your arm off and become a one-handed, bank-robber murderer? With free, will we all have our calling.
Well, the bank robber and murderer bits are infringing on *other* people's rights.... Surely you could've worked that out for yourself?
Don't bother, he's not interested in thinking for himself
Same. I might say mentally instead of spiritually but yeah. I have two kids, don’t necessarily want any more. It would be nice not to worry about it, but, I think knowing I’m technically sterile would lower my sex drive and take some of the pleasure out of it. Sex is mostly mental.
As a married man cream pies for life sounds fantastic
Classic redditor moment
First, I read it as "Matheus 🤝 Mephistopheles" I was wondering what had Matheus done, and the damn pic didn't clear anything at all for me kkkkkkkkk
Thread is overblowing the picture but it’s a weird thing to celebrate. Maybe there’s more context to it.
These people are anti life, and it's sad.
Lol betaaa
I was gonna say "at least she can bake"...but she cant even do that
The world is on a population decline. This is stupid.
Bro probably already had the kids he and his wife wanted and is now taking the burden of birth control from her. That's almost exclusively when and why dudes get vasectomies
yeah, it's all stupid, but your comment about a population decline still wrong.
Off that's kinda evil
"Well guys it wasn't my idea, it was my wife's new boyfriend idea for me to get the vasectomy" A likely backstory?