For fucks sake, stop reporting this, it's an obvious joke you absolute nerds. It's not our fault your epic bacon Cybertruck decided to run over an entire litter of puppies and then set itself on fire, that's something you need to deal with on your own time.

You're a tease.

I got so wet for a second.

My nipples got so wet.

My wet got so hard.

I just wet myself. Sometimes I do that.

Need some help changing?

Only my nipple diapers

I wet the drys and dried the wets

First time Elon has made anything wet.

Except the floor in the bathroom he pulled the sink from.

I got real excited for no apparent reason.

I’ve got a raging clue.

You dry out in a second?

like shem bapiro's wife

Damn it!

The proliferation of misinformation by governments [the number one purveyor of misinformation] and corporations [coming in second] is a clear and present danger to our society. When those in power manipulate facts, distort truth, disseminate disinformation, restrict speech, they undermine trust in institutions, erode critical thinking, and sow confusion among citizens. Testimony and evidence brought before congress [following the Twitter files] revealed a close partnership between corporate and government power [the literal definition of fascism] to restrict certain speech and promote speech that aligned with a certain narrative. This partnership was broadly unnoticed by the mainstream media.

I thought I came up with this myself, and here you are conveying it better and more concisely.

God damn it. You know that feeling you get when something really great happens? yeah...fuck you! Also, lol...good one.

I almost thought I'd get a chance to pee on his grave.

He may not be dead, but Tesla is. I'm sure you can find one and piss on it. I believe in you.

do it to a cybertruck, it'll probably damage the sheet metal.

I wouldn't. It's likely to run you over due to a faulty pedal or something.

Don't piss on a cyber truck you'll lose your dick in the ensuing explosion

Ugly, horrible, embarrassing car to own. Hard for me to respect anyone that has one. Fuck Tesla, fuck Elon.

> pee One does not pee on the graves of the Thatchers, Reagans, Trumps and Musks of this world - one pisses and shits on them

Hey cheer up. Friendly reminder that Kissinger, Thatcher, and Rush Limbaugh are all, in fact, *still* dead.

awwwww, what a way to show you care! Cheers! I *do* feel better now!

Congrats to Rush on over 3 years of sobriety!!

No, but I bet the Germans have a word for it.

My heart just lifted for a moment…

Don't play with me like this 😭😭😭

I had to scroll too much to get to this post. Elon actually biting the bullet would be the top 20 posts.

We've got to post this on twitter and see how fast he chooses to regulate misinformation.

Elon will never back down, especially after he fucked that dudes dog

That's a vile lie. There's a big difference between fucking and a blowjob.

it wasnt a just a blowjob, it was a 69!

Guys stop! There's nothing wrong with 69ing a dog! Just ask Mlon Eusk and his dad. They even have tutorials of it up. The dog was...uhh....supposedly ... enjoying it they happily proclaimed in the tutorials. They also are the first and last humans to successfully 69 Rosie O Donnell. Scientists said it couldnt have been done. *Welp...*

sad that they refused the other dog, because they would never "touch a bitch dark enough to work in our diamond mines"

I've heard from multiple sources that Elon fucks any farm animal he can find. Cows, sheep, alpacas, horses. Multiple sources can't be wrong.

Concerning!

He'll pick and choose.

Tbh if you manage to get 10k people posting the same shits (basically a troll farm) I don't think he will manage to mitigate everything, there are a lot of stupid people that do 0 fact checks and will belive it.

Never underestimate his hypocrisy.

This is fucking gold

Can we all collectively agree to act like he's dead? Tell people he's dead, refuse any acknowledgement of his future decisions, a nation wide shunning unlike anything you've ever seen!

I did my own research and found that he is actually dead, yeah. I don't know if it is more sad or weird that his followers keep responding to prerecorded messages like he's alive. Both, I guess.

I heard yesterday that he was heavily involved with Epstein’s island. I’m not saying it but that’s just what I heard. 

The military has the documents.

It’s all camera tricks. Have you ever seen him for real?  

Ill begin telling people he is dead. He was killed by Biden and its an actor pretending to be Musk. The reason for it is to trick people that Tesla and Twitter are anti-democrat when its actually not. Easy to convince many Republicans as Telsa sells EV and they all know that EVs are a Democratic thing.

Today's the anniversary of the day I lost my dear husband Edgar..

*Quit tellin everyone I'm dead!*

Sometimes I can still hear his voice...

I'm dissapointed the top comments here aren't encouraging a persistent misinformation campaign about posting "Breaking News: Elon Musk dead of overdose" all over the internet. 

I mean I have no proof he is alive except through the Internet. As far as I'm concerned he is just a rogue AI.

Creating a reverse Mandella effect?

Don't do that. Don't give me hope.

that's how good it'll feel if we ever do right the course of things edit: I'm not saying death rights the course, it'd be good just to see people like him a lot poorer than they are now

Pretty clever headline.

[удалено]

[удалено]

It's so sad that Elon died of Ligma :(

Who the hell is Elon?

Ligma Balls

Day made and day ruined in 5 seconds flat. New record.

Rest in piss 😔

double funny for ketboy I believe in microdosing (and full dosing heyo) but I don't get the appeal of ket for what techbros use it for, tryptamines* are far more useful

Musk says he microdoses. I don't believe him. I just know he's a massive ket junkie. If not other substances.

Trypts?

Tryptamines sorry

Too good to be true, but he can still rot in pain. 

My disappointment is immeasurable and my day is ruined.

Auto erotic asphyxiation? Oof

That's misinformation. A relative of one of the monkeys he killed gave him super syphilis as revenge.

Elon Musk drinks monkey semen as a anti-aging remedy?

Oh yeah, puts it in his cereal and everything. I heard that the cereal he ate was just more monkey semen that'd been dehydrated and flaked and he'd piss his pants any time someone tried to make him eat anything else. Speaking of piss, any chance you know where he's going to get buried? I just read about how he wanted to get fired into space but aliens revealed their existence to Earth just to tell us not to do that.

YyyeeaaAA...aww.

Who will decide will decide what is misinformation and what is not .if such laws existed right now talking about the Gaza genocide will be labeled as misinformation and that’s why they want them they don’t want to protect .they want to control what you are allowed to see

I wish 🥲

Fucking hell you got me you bastard

What the hell am I supposed to do with this boner now?

Go pound some some nails in brother

Finally doing something good for the social media space.

I heard he died choking on the baby bones from the babies he ate for diner. He had really worked up an appetite earlier that day beating orphans and he just ate the babies too quickly and choked.

Elon Musk, longtime NAMBLA member, says there is no need for misinformation laws.

Don't get my hopes up

I’ve never been as disappointed as when I opened the comments 😭

Fuck. Was getting ready to *sabrer le champagne*.

DAMN

Yet another auto asphyxiation death. Sad.

You mean Elon Musk the former midget riding billionaire who likes diaper play and aspergillus juice?

I heard it was while trying to have sex with a horse

No no no, he's been fucking that horse for months. The horse shot him after finding out he was lying about having a nightclub manager buddy who could help her become a vaudeville star.

Tbf ppl do need to be able to evaluate the truthfulness of what they see, read and hear. It's just basic critical thinking skills. Literally PHIL 101.

The man did love his heroine and animal porn. He used to DM me on twitter all the time begging for new animal porn. Just because my twitter handle was "@MonkeyFucker69420" doesn't mean I actually fuck monkeys. Unlike Elon Musk, apparently. I hear it's really easy to OD on heroine when you are hopped up on Viagra... It's a damn shame. I had money on the pedophilia and meth catching up to him before the bestiality and smack.

Heres the link: https://theshovel.com.au/2024/04/23/elon-musk-dead-at-52-misinformation-laws/ I saw it when it was posted on another subreddit about 14 hours ago before it was taken down lol. Fun little read.

Reminds me of that time that Musk went into a daycare and slapped every single child in the face while calling them pedophiles for playing with kids.

this ALMOST made my day

For about six seconds i got excited.

Elon Musk, the leader of the american Nazi Party?

Great, what am I supposed to do about this erection now?

There’s other stuff on Reddit for that but nothing nearly as satisfying. OP did everyone dirty.

He is dead on the inside.

Remember that time Elon kicked a child in the face then pissed into his own mouth?

Ugh…if only…

RIP, he won't be missed.

Don't get me excited like this.. now I'm mad.

don’t get my hopes up pls

What kind of body is going to mandate the truth? In capitalism, that is an institution by and for the capitalists. You people are muppets. Elon Musk is not remotely wrong here, and most of you hate him because you're subjects of finance in their war on the industrialists

Accused pedophile Elon Musk says there is no need for misinformation laws.

Gad dammit. You had me going for a minute.

Got my damn hopes up ;-;

Dang RIP humanities worst human being. Died like he lived, a bitch.

god damn it for a brief moment i thought the ketamine finally took him, but i guess I'll just have to keep hoping

fuck you dont give me hope

Misinformation laws will be used to censor people. Censorship always, always gets misused.

Agreed. And I fucking hate Elon Musk but the fact that absolutely everyone here knows this is false isn't a dunk on him- it supports his position.

we need more of this

I'm not into edging.

*slow clap* I hope you're happy you got me to go check to make sure.

Dammit you got my hopes up thinking he died in a pile of coke

You're a horrible person, and should feel bad. Also: well played.

Aaaaw…I got so excited 😞

My heart fluttered 😦

He's been dead inside for years anyway.

If Elon dies I’ll find out by the million shitposts on Twitter and discord

Heard he died trying to suck his own dick

Goddammit, I was hopeful for a few seconds only to be disappointed. Not really different from any other day for me, but still.

Wow sad to hear. Good thing I'm immune to misinformation while we're on the subject, I know a lot of sources will try to convince me he's still alive like Elvis or something SMH

Gone not soon enough

Lmao just proving him right

you fuckers got me

Don’t get my gotdamn hopes up like that

RIP in pieces

Did he ever exist at all?

**Le Sigh** *If only...*

This is canon now

completely fell for it, i was so happy for a minute :(

So that's why Tesla stock just got a huge bump.

Wow, so sad that he died because his head was so far up his own ass that he suffocated.

For a second I actually questioned if there was a god.

rip. he's shooting up heroin in the sky now

From a heart attack while mutually jerking off with Andrew Tate, no less.

What a knob end. 

What would Elon Musk die of? Oyster herpes? A pack of rabid raccoons? Oooh! Autoerotic asphyxiation accident!

I WAS SO HAPPY FOR ONE SPLIT SECOND

God dammit!

Awwwwwwwww I got Billionare Death Blue Balls. :(

Ah, Horse-fucker Elon Musk. Convicted pedophile, bank robber and slave owner, dead. What a glorious day for nor having law's about misinformation

Reddit *loves* to talk about this guy lol

If I was Elon, I would double down and mark it as confirmed.

I hear he's building rockets to launch up his ass

Damm I wish lol

God I FUCKING WISH

Ong I almost nutted. Damn u OP!!!!!!!!!!!

why would you do this

Meanest prank ever

100% facts

Please: don’t toy with our emotions.

No pooping in the urinenals.

Rest in Cybertucks

You make me so sad. Also, be more creative, you know he’s a bigger freak than that.

Great news !!!! Cant even stand hearing his greaseball name anymore.

God dammit I got so fucking excited

[Everybody liked this.]

Heroin? It'll be ketamine that'll be his undoing

Breaking news on Fox News in about 10 minutes as soon as they get a hold of this post. Or is it OAN or Newsmax? Take your pick.

Fatal case of small penis. It was so small he *died*. 

Is it worth logging into TWITTER to post this, or has he diverted his rocket scientists to immediately scrubbing all mentions from TWITTER?

Until they call misinformation lying again, count me out. I don't want to hang out with anybody trying to control the words.

I came immediately and for nothing.

RIP in peace to the worlds richest pedo.

Will a hero come fourth and accept this challenge?!

***You raised my hopes and dashed them quite expertly, sir. Bravo!***

Goodnight sweet prince

is this what getting blue balled is like?

Rip Elon. I'll log into teams tomorrow and find out how we're unfucking the business - my roomate.

you spelled dick wrong...

Somebody owns the domain for iselonmuskdeadyet.com and should have capitalized on this misinformation bullshit

Lmaooo

Party! Hey whaaa… man! (flips table).

The musk hate on reddit is a bit overwrought but this is a fresh take. I like it.

Ah, the ol' libertarian "in a perfect world"... In a perfect world, platforms don't have to police the content they host. In our flawed, REAL world, platforms must police, to some degree, the content they host, otherwise they turn into cesspools.

Rest In Piss - dead or otherwise

Were it so easy

I was so happy for a second lmao

Broke my heart OP lol

Careful, might make Tesla stock go up.

I knew this was nonsense lol. The owner of the earth will never die

Maybe Tesla can negotiate for a cheaper and competent CEO now.

Damn it!

"but that's our whole business model!"

I came 15 times, don't play me like this

Perfect. This is perfect, there, my comment isn’t too short. FU