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Fi-loves-letters

I think she might not know exactly what phrasing to use and is trying to be respectful. Girl also said “intenfull” 🤔


Quick-Agency9907

I bursted out laughing and tried to find a post about it on Reddit immediately 🤣


katedigby

me too. im so satisfied


phillythompson

Can explain the cringe to me? She is repeating he said to her. And she is making the point that she was already in love with his soul, so his comment was unnecessary, That’s why she said “but”. It’s like there is no right way to do this apparently, if she acknowledges his race, that’s bad it’s a show about love is blind . If she doesn’t care (like here), that’s bad because his blackness is very important and how dare she dismiss it(??). If she is indifferent, that’s bad because again, it’s dismissive . There is not racism in everything, cmon. Acting like Iid isn’t helpful to the overall goal of eliminating it entirely .


reducedandconfused

It’s been explained already, it’s not her bringing up race, it’s her framing it in the way that she loves his soul even though he’s black. Very basic reason why it’s problematic tbh. And no one’s hating on her. People don’t always frame things the best way. It’s okay lol


reducedandconfused

Tbh it’s not the way she worded “he identifies…” but I was surprised there was no criticism of her saying but she sees his soul first. Wtf is that supposed to mean? What’s wrong with seeing his appearance first? It implies it’s somehow gracious to date someone black and see past their race


Resident_Duck_4139

For a moment I took the “he identifies” as her trying to show how woke she is


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reducedandconfused

She can mention race no problem just don’t say you’re looking past it. Is that really that hard to understand?


GiraffeLibrarian

it means she sees his love for God/his spiritual soul above all else


Falooting

I hope so lol because that whole speech just gave off thinly-veiled racist MIL that "doesn't see color".


Current-Cow-5199

Yeah I found the whole scene cringe, that part included. It’s giving “I don’t see color”


Suspicious_Load6908

Yeah I noticed that too. Hopefully it just came out wrong 😑


spencersreed

episode 7 here and I have bad news 😭


MixtureGrand

Chelsea identifies as Megan Fox 🤣


allmyphalanges

I laughed out loud


More-City6818

Black mixed w/Black


_2sunshine2_

Ken told her he identifies as a Black male — those were his words. She didn’t speak for him or make assumptions. Not sure what is cringey about that.


lifetake

It’s the “but” after that is the weird part. You use the word “but” to make an exception. So we have “black male, but Ken” to simplify and if we assume what is on the inside of Ken is good that means people who identify as black normally bad. She probably didn’t mean it like this, but can’t chide people for doing a double take on her words.


Slight_Affect

She said “but” because she’s not black. In other words, we are not of the same race but what I care is what is on the inside. If people interpret it some sort of way then maybe some introspection might help.


arrrrjt

I took that as her making it not about looks as per the premise of the show. See what you are saying though, it's worded very weird.


SnooRadishes9685

You’re absolutely right, the ‘but’ is what makes it weird…he’s yxz but what I care is the inside, freudian slip


Qsmitz

I loved that. She is being respectful. You guys get so butt hurt I swear.


QueenLisa007

Who do you mean by “you guys”? Just curious


Qsmitz

You guys = people in this sub


lifetake

Its her words after that make it weird. “And he identifies as a black male. But I see Ken first for who he is on the inside” the combo is weird. It sets up an implication that him being black is bad with the “but”. You very often use “but” to make an exception so in this case Ken is the exception to other black males due to what he has on the inside. All that said it was probably just poor choice of wording.


phillythompson

omg no. You look for racism every where so you’ll of course find it. She is respecting Ken, repeating what he said word for word. But she is saying,”but” because to her, he needn’t have said anything at all. Her pain was he said it, but I’d was unnecessary because she loves his soul already,


Qsmitz

Who knows what production says/asks to get these statements though. They are not always just speaking their random thoughts but they are being prompted.


dana-rtw

That was a choice of words. Whew! Cringe.


AlternativeSeaweed99

I also eye rolled….BUT….then I thought about it a bit more. He could be mixed race, and at this point they’re still preserving some of the mystery. He told her he’s black, and I can see why race would be a detail both would want to share before the reveal, but there could be more there. I think her intention was to be respectful of information she had at the time while not make assumptions before meeting in person and talking in depth about their cultures.


Nice_Exercise5552

Yes! Just as an example, I’ve had Afro-Latino friends who’ve identified as Black and Afro-Latino friends who’ve identified as Hispanic. While those individuals could have identified as both, for their own reasons, they decided not to go that route (unless you got into an extended conversation with them). I know it probably just made it simpler in life when filling out forms as most don’t have an “Afro-Latino” box to check. So, I agree, saying he “identifies as…” was important because otherwise fans of the show might say “why are you ignoring (this part) his heritage” if he has mixed heritage.


ilovepoutine_

I totally rolled my eyes when she said that!! cringe.