When all else fails I keep thinking " you've already survived 100% of your worst days. Keep going!"
Don't give up! There is so much more to life than the difficult hills to climb! Im sorry you're going through this right now and have been, there is statistically more of those bad feelings with people with MS, as well as depression and anxiety, and no it's not easy to get out of or else we would all do it! Like the flip of a switch, but that's not how life works! You got this! Lean on some people in this group, after all there are a lot of us that can relate to how you're feeling!
Please take it easy on yoursel, take it one hour at a time, one min, one sec! Whatever you gotta do to make it further and further! Edit: I sent you a msg, not sure how exactly that works or if it even went through!
Hey OP, I'm glad you reached out to your community. I have MS and went through a physical altercation that began my divorce process a few ago. These days are scary, stressful, and just generally shitty. But I can say it will be worth it. Do what you can to keep your body and mind safe—hydration, vitamins, walks in nature, and lots of self care. Get massages, take baths, have the occasional and moderate drink or treat.
Its also important to note that depression is a massively common MS symptom. I used to think it was because of fears or trouble adjusting, but as someone that suffers that symptom pretty strongly, I've realized it's a brain chemistry thing. We don't have situational depression, it's literally caused by the inflammation or whatever else, and it's a common part of life for us! So that's where nature comes in, and therapy, write affirmations on your mirror (yes it really does help) and whatever else you need.
You're not disposable, and life is hard and what you're going through is hard, but you're going to get through this and come out the other side. Sending hugs and spoons your way, OP. Stay strong but also remember it's so okay to cry as much as you need.
I'm sorry you're going through this right now, it sounds really tough. Try to be gentle with yourself and your feelings in these hard times, it's understandable that you'd be stressed out and feel down. It's a normal reaction to unfortunate circumstances, most people would feel pretty bummed about it. Try to give yourself compassion, time, and space to feel these things, and try to remember it won't always be this way. You haven't always felt this way, and you won't always feel this way, that's just how our emotions work. Also it can be helpful to try to remember other times when you felt differently, maybe you were extremely hungry and ate a bunch of pizza, or you were feeling silly with your friends, or some times you were even feeling joyful. I know it's hard to do when we're bummed out but even recognizing and acknowledging those other times in your life when you felt differently can be helpful to remind your brain this too will pass, and there are other things in store.
Also have you ever tried mindfulness meditation? It's not an instant cure but if you can quiet your mind, or concentrate on thing that isn't the stuff that's stressing you out for even 5 minutes it can do a lot to throw a monkey wrench in the cycles we get caught in sometimes. The process is basically: you let yourself sit quietly with your eyes closed, and then you try to focus on your breath and nothing else for 5 minutes. Letting other thoughts that pop up come and go, and gently returning your attention to your breath. If you get distracted, bring your attention back when you catch it and try riding out the 5 minutes. It's really neat how it can kind of reset your attention.
Also things really might not be this bad for us, think about all the medical scientists all over the world working on remyelination treatments or other possible treatments for MS and nerve issues. There will one day be something so much more than just slowing the disease, or treating the symptoms, but one day there can be treatment to reverse the nerve damage, there could effectively be a cure. That gives me hope to think about it, it makes me think that if I can get through the thick of this mess until then, then a much better life is possible.
Wishing you the best, hang in there and be kind to yourself!
Got divorced 6mo after Dx
Constant Child custody battle for 4yrs post Dx
Not 1 major flare up since before Dx now 9yrs later, symptoms weren’t great then or now but I survived and thrived post divorce and met the woman of my dreams.
Suicide ideation, everyday, well most days. No plans either but life is a mother fucker to keep treading with the uncertainty most days. Not gonna give up for my wife or kids but its hard.
Keep trucking man, get a therapist, I start back up with one on Friday. Sounds like you might need some meds even if temporarily, I know I prolly do.
Know that MS, and some of the medications used to treat it, can increase depression and anxiety. If you are not currently seeing a psychiatrist or psychologist, please contact your doctor for guidance. It is likely that you might need an antidepressant, just to calm the intrusive thoughts and rumination. Mental healthcare is a very important part of living with MS.
Stay strong, OP. You are not alone.
I think like this on a daily then i go somewhere that mskes me smile and the thoughts go away for the time being this is the life we got its unfortunate but im sure there are people who lobe you friend just have to keep fighting it suck alot of the time but look at the small victorys and find new hobbies and deep breath
I'm sorry to hear you and others are at their point currently, I have definitely been there myself.
Do you get any relief from massage? Can you afford to go and get an hour massage? We have cheaper walk in places in Australia which are surprisingly effective. Or can you talk to your doctor or neuro about an increase in any prescription medications for pain?
I hope you can find some relief. It's frustrating and unfair and I empathise with you.
i’m so sorry that you’re going through this. 2022 was the worst year of my life and i’m pretty much only here because if i left this stupid planet my daughter would never forgive me. i brought her into this world and im obligated to not hurt her.
find whatever you can that calms and soothes your nervous system.
- massage
- yin yoga/stretching/qi gong/tai chi
- gentle exercise/dance
- hug someone/pet
- weighted blanket
- massage device
the goal is so soothe your body and try to zone out your mind, which isn’t easy with all the stress you have. find a purpose - long term/short term.
call your local ms organisation and ask for help. they should have social workers that can assist. my neuro referred me to social worker from my local ms when i was going through struggles in circa 2010 and she changed my life.
talk to your doctor, discuss meds, referral to psychologist/counsellor and other resources.
you’re being carried along in a torrent and it’s so hard to focus to grab onto something to get yourself out, and even googling a phone number seems too arduous. reach out. it might take a few tries, but it’s worth it
I'm proud of you for choosing to continue on. The option to check out is always there and it's an easy way out. It takes courage and strength in spades to continue on. You have both. You have so much endurance. Other people would crumble under the pressure you're experiencing right now. You are not disposable. You are a diamond. Any one of the circumstances you're facing is too much to handle. It's completely okay to not be okay, but know that you will be okay again. This will not be forever, I promise.
If you even think that you're relapsing, call your dr and get the medicine that you need. Don't tough through, you don't have to prove to anyone how strong you are. Look at what you're going through, only the strongest people handle what you're handling. It's okay to need a tune-up after the beating that life has served you. (I mean that in the kindest way possible.) I would even recommend, getting on the phone with your nurse's line or leaving a message for your neuro and letting them know that you're going through a major life change. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.
I'm sorry that there is nothing more I can do to help you out. You have my sincere empathy. I don't envy what you're going through. I wish you all the best in your health journey, and I hope you get the best divorce settlement ever. Sending you hugs if it means anything to you. I'd let you cry on my shoulder to let it all out. I see you. I hear you. You are not disposable. You will get through this and have good days again. Pinky promise.
I'm so sorry, OP. You're in such a tough spot. It's so hard to feel that way.
First, are you in therapy? If not, I'd highly recommend finding a good therapist if you're able.
Second, and more importantly, your mind lies to you when you're feeling like this. Brains are assholes and unfortunately they're also really good at what they do, and when you're feeling like you're feeling, it's really hard to see anything positive in your life. So, a couple of questions.
-what in life brings you joy? It could be as simple as a good cup of coffee or as significant as a relationship with friends and family.
-you mention that you wouldn't put anyone through that. Who are these people who matter so much to you? What are your relationships like with them? Can you make a list of the relationships you have and next to each name write down how you've had a positive impact on that person? If you can't think of anything, ask them. You don't have to tell them why you're asking. But I imagine they might be able to help you see your value, even though you can't right now. You are certainly not disposable, or else these relationships with these people wouldn't matter.
-regarding purpose: for better or worse, we get to decide what we want our purpose in life to be. What do you find meaning in, even if it's something other people maybe don't? How can you take small steps, or do small things, to help build meaning into more of your every day routine?
-Finally, if you're open to it, I highly recommend starting a gratitude journal and writing down 3 things you're grateful for at the end of every day. Try and make them specific to the day (I'm grateful there was a new episode of that show I'm watching on today) as opposed to generalized (I'm grateful for my family), although you can go to generalized if the day has been particularly hard. When you're depressed, your brain stops noticing the good things and will focus on the bad because it's how you're feeling. Doing this every night will start to retrain your brain to see the positives, even though that seems impossible right now. It will likely be really difficult at first, but should get easier in time.
Source: am therapist, with MS, who has also been suicidal.
I feel you. Unavoidable stress sucks. My mom was diagnosed with cancer 2 years after my diagnosis. i was extremely sad and worried but i have not relapsed thankfully. it sucks that knowing you can be blind or disabled temporarily just because you showed a human reaction to a sad thing.
it can seem like a silly advice but please try to not dwell about the bigger picture and take this hard times one day at a time. Just watch your favourite sitcom or feel good movie, eat your favourite food way more often,make plans with your friends. It might seem like a basic advice for this much of a dark time but this little things saved me from the darkness last year.
Keep pushing knowing that things will get better. Keep your head up and try your best to find time throughout the day to do small things that make you happy. A favourite meal, a drink with a friend, a day at the beach, a short vacation or staycation, whatever makes you happy, carve out the time and do it for yourself and come out a bit stronger… you have to find reasons to make this life worth it, they aren’t always given to you. MS won’t be the end of me because I’ve found to many reasons to push forward during the most difficult times of this disease, even if it’s 1000 pushes a day, I ain’t quitting and then I’ll wake up and do it again. Find that strength, we all have it!
In the same spot as you. The only thing keeping me alive right now are my folks, if they died tomorrow I'm probably not around next week. But they are around so I have no choice. That has kind of been the rock I've clung to in the worst times. Maybe you can find something similar?
Not to be so damn cliche, try to do small little things that improve your life in ways you can. I went to the gym yesterday, it helped a little today. I cleaned my house a bit, that helped a little more. Again, I know "Just workout" is such a stereotypical response to suicidal thoughts, but little "Yeah, life sucks but at least I did that today." moments have helped me a bit.
Bad comes to worse, you've always got me to be an internet stranger you can reach out to.
I completely hear you and understand. There’s a song called “Harmony Hall” by Vampire Weekend with the lyric “I don’t want to live like this, but I don’t want to die.” I definitely think both things can be true on the worst days. But we keep going, and like others have said, find those little lily pads to hold onto, one day at a time. Sometimes I literally tell myself not to think, just cut the tomatoes or pet the cat and keep going. My thoughts can just make it worse. It’s very hard. And we’re doing it right now, together. <3
I’m with you. I’m divorcing, my MS feels constant, my job is wobbly, I’m focusing on my young child and his recovery from witnessing emotional and verbal abuse. I can’t leave this earth until he is an adult on his own two feet. But I would love to take the big sleep and be done here.
I went through a very dark time a couple of years ago that sounds similar to where you are. It was scary and awful and numbing, and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.
I’m sorry you’re going through this. I hope you’ll stay, and I hope it gets better.
I know this is not science, but personally I experienced less pain after the mental stress calmed down. I worked a lot on breathing properly (even though you don't believe in Buddhism, they give a lot of great advice on this matter.) Also..I moved somewhere it's medium hot all year (around 25°C/68F) and near the ocean (I started swimming a lot). After 8 months I feel my pain especially, have gone down many levels. My fatigue is also better, but not as much as with the pain.
In my town there is also another man with progressive MS who's in a wheelchair, and he moved her for the same reasons. He also swims a lot and he says he feels so much better than before, it's like living here has just slowed down the process. But both of us have one rule we live by, NO MORE STRESS, and we try to lessen the emotional and mental stress life gives everyone. It's a sure way to get more sick, as we see it.
I wish you the best -and remember, you are a beautiful being, and even though the relationship you just were in didn't work out, there will be new love to be found, you stick it out and then you start working on healing yourself inside. The more you heal, the bigger the chance of meeting someone who is just right for you 💜
I'm so sorry for you. I've been there and let me tell ya I was afraid at first too. BUT it was one of the best things for my mind and health. I, like you, cared more about the well being of others first. But after my 20+ years marriage ended I changed everything in my life and focused, for once on me. I'm a better person both mentally and physically for taking that step. Thankfully our divorce was amicable and we are still friends today. My kids were also grown so that helped as well. This is a big step in your life and you should take full advantage of it. Turn this into a positive, focus on you. You won't be disappointed and make your life YOURS!
Multiple sclerosis only seems like it gives the opportunity for people to say that I should "keep going'... But what the f*** does that mean anyway? Keep going? Should I be trying to become exactly like them or something? I'm not a keep going person. I'm an experience something s***** and then die from misery person. I know it sounds like I'm just negative. It's inverse and unhappy up in this. I really do just want to be balls deep in positivity for once, though.
It's up to us to bloom where we're planted. I'm so sorry your soil is just terrible right now, but it's not guaranteed to always be terrible. If you've survived this long, you've got some fighting spirit in you. Lean on that.
I’m right there with you. MS sucks, divorce sucks. This disease finds ways to crush our will to live. We each have to find what gets us through the shitty times. Plenty of posts sharing how some people get through, and maybe it can help you. The answer is different for everyone. You have to remember that within each of us is the answer. No two people experience MS the same and no two people have the same way to get through it. But we do. So will you. That’s how we give MS the finger.
\*\*Trigger Warning for some\*\*
You do what you have thought about doing since the start. You sign up for the ablative aHSCT. If you're having suicidal thoughts already, then the risk of suicide is already way higher than the 1%-3% mortality rate of this procedure. For the many of RRMSers, it is by all effects and purposes a cure. Is it a sure thing? I wouldn't call 70% a sure thing but even if you're in the 30% that still progresses you will do so at a much slower rate.
In a way, I'm glad my suicidal thoughts came early in my disease course because this tipped the scales of risk/reward tremendously. Doctors like to compare death rates between medicines without accounting for the risks associated with MS itself. They get to go to their normal lives after work. Many of us don't have a life to go back to.
When all else fails I keep thinking " you've already survived 100% of your worst days. Keep going!" Don't give up! There is so much more to life than the difficult hills to climb! Im sorry you're going through this right now and have been, there is statistically more of those bad feelings with people with MS, as well as depression and anxiety, and no it's not easy to get out of or else we would all do it! Like the flip of a switch, but that's not how life works! You got this! Lean on some people in this group, after all there are a lot of us that can relate to how you're feeling! Please take it easy on yoursel, take it one hour at a time, one min, one sec! Whatever you gotta do to make it further and further! Edit: I sent you a msg, not sure how exactly that works or if it even went through!
Hey OP, I'm glad you reached out to your community. I have MS and went through a physical altercation that began my divorce process a few ago. These days are scary, stressful, and just generally shitty. But I can say it will be worth it. Do what you can to keep your body and mind safe—hydration, vitamins, walks in nature, and lots of self care. Get massages, take baths, have the occasional and moderate drink or treat. Its also important to note that depression is a massively common MS symptom. I used to think it was because of fears or trouble adjusting, but as someone that suffers that symptom pretty strongly, I've realized it's a brain chemistry thing. We don't have situational depression, it's literally caused by the inflammation or whatever else, and it's a common part of life for us! So that's where nature comes in, and therapy, write affirmations on your mirror (yes it really does help) and whatever else you need. You're not disposable, and life is hard and what you're going through is hard, but you're going to get through this and come out the other side. Sending hugs and spoons your way, OP. Stay strong but also remember it's so okay to cry as much as you need.
I'm sorry you're going through this right now, it sounds really tough. Try to be gentle with yourself and your feelings in these hard times, it's understandable that you'd be stressed out and feel down. It's a normal reaction to unfortunate circumstances, most people would feel pretty bummed about it. Try to give yourself compassion, time, and space to feel these things, and try to remember it won't always be this way. You haven't always felt this way, and you won't always feel this way, that's just how our emotions work. Also it can be helpful to try to remember other times when you felt differently, maybe you were extremely hungry and ate a bunch of pizza, or you were feeling silly with your friends, or some times you were even feeling joyful. I know it's hard to do when we're bummed out but even recognizing and acknowledging those other times in your life when you felt differently can be helpful to remind your brain this too will pass, and there are other things in store. Also have you ever tried mindfulness meditation? It's not an instant cure but if you can quiet your mind, or concentrate on thing that isn't the stuff that's stressing you out for even 5 minutes it can do a lot to throw a monkey wrench in the cycles we get caught in sometimes. The process is basically: you let yourself sit quietly with your eyes closed, and then you try to focus on your breath and nothing else for 5 minutes. Letting other thoughts that pop up come and go, and gently returning your attention to your breath. If you get distracted, bring your attention back when you catch it and try riding out the 5 minutes. It's really neat how it can kind of reset your attention. Also things really might not be this bad for us, think about all the medical scientists all over the world working on remyelination treatments or other possible treatments for MS and nerve issues. There will one day be something so much more than just slowing the disease, or treating the symptoms, but one day there can be treatment to reverse the nerve damage, there could effectively be a cure. That gives me hope to think about it, it makes me think that if I can get through the thick of this mess until then, then a much better life is possible. Wishing you the best, hang in there and be kind to yourself!
Got divorced 6mo after Dx Constant Child custody battle for 4yrs post Dx Not 1 major flare up since before Dx now 9yrs later, symptoms weren’t great then or now but I survived and thrived post divorce and met the woman of my dreams. Suicide ideation, everyday, well most days. No plans either but life is a mother fucker to keep treading with the uncertainty most days. Not gonna give up for my wife or kids but its hard. Keep trucking man, get a therapist, I start back up with one on Friday. Sounds like you might need some meds even if temporarily, I know I prolly do.
Know that MS, and some of the medications used to treat it, can increase depression and anxiety. If you are not currently seeing a psychiatrist or psychologist, please contact your doctor for guidance. It is likely that you might need an antidepressant, just to calm the intrusive thoughts and rumination. Mental healthcare is a very important part of living with MS. Stay strong, OP. You are not alone.
I think like this on a daily then i go somewhere that mskes me smile and the thoughts go away for the time being this is the life we got its unfortunate but im sure there are people who lobe you friend just have to keep fighting it suck alot of the time but look at the small victorys and find new hobbies and deep breath
I'm sorry to hear you and others are at their point currently, I have definitely been there myself. Do you get any relief from massage? Can you afford to go and get an hour massage? We have cheaper walk in places in Australia which are surprisingly effective. Or can you talk to your doctor or neuro about an increase in any prescription medications for pain? I hope you can find some relief. It's frustrating and unfair and I empathise with you.
i’m so sorry that you’re going through this. 2022 was the worst year of my life and i’m pretty much only here because if i left this stupid planet my daughter would never forgive me. i brought her into this world and im obligated to not hurt her. find whatever you can that calms and soothes your nervous system. - massage - yin yoga/stretching/qi gong/tai chi - gentle exercise/dance - hug someone/pet - weighted blanket - massage device the goal is so soothe your body and try to zone out your mind, which isn’t easy with all the stress you have. find a purpose - long term/short term. call your local ms organisation and ask for help. they should have social workers that can assist. my neuro referred me to social worker from my local ms when i was going through struggles in circa 2010 and she changed my life. talk to your doctor, discuss meds, referral to psychologist/counsellor and other resources. you’re being carried along in a torrent and it’s so hard to focus to grab onto something to get yourself out, and even googling a phone number seems too arduous. reach out. it might take a few tries, but it’s worth it
I'm proud of you for choosing to continue on. The option to check out is always there and it's an easy way out. It takes courage and strength in spades to continue on. You have both. You have so much endurance. Other people would crumble under the pressure you're experiencing right now. You are not disposable. You are a diamond. Any one of the circumstances you're facing is too much to handle. It's completely okay to not be okay, but know that you will be okay again. This will not be forever, I promise. If you even think that you're relapsing, call your dr and get the medicine that you need. Don't tough through, you don't have to prove to anyone how strong you are. Look at what you're going through, only the strongest people handle what you're handling. It's okay to need a tune-up after the beating that life has served you. (I mean that in the kindest way possible.) I would even recommend, getting on the phone with your nurse's line or leaving a message for your neuro and letting them know that you're going through a major life change. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. I'm sorry that there is nothing more I can do to help you out. You have my sincere empathy. I don't envy what you're going through. I wish you all the best in your health journey, and I hope you get the best divorce settlement ever. Sending you hugs if it means anything to you. I'd let you cry on my shoulder to let it all out. I see you. I hear you. You are not disposable. You will get through this and have good days again. Pinky promise.
Right there with ya, 23 years with this disease and 17 years in a failing relationship. Dunno what to do.
Must be going around. I found out my husband has been cheating on me. I feel like I am on a verge of a relapse. Hugs
I'm so sorry, OP. You're in such a tough spot. It's so hard to feel that way. First, are you in therapy? If not, I'd highly recommend finding a good therapist if you're able. Second, and more importantly, your mind lies to you when you're feeling like this. Brains are assholes and unfortunately they're also really good at what they do, and when you're feeling like you're feeling, it's really hard to see anything positive in your life. So, a couple of questions. -what in life brings you joy? It could be as simple as a good cup of coffee or as significant as a relationship with friends and family. -you mention that you wouldn't put anyone through that. Who are these people who matter so much to you? What are your relationships like with them? Can you make a list of the relationships you have and next to each name write down how you've had a positive impact on that person? If you can't think of anything, ask them. You don't have to tell them why you're asking. But I imagine they might be able to help you see your value, even though you can't right now. You are certainly not disposable, or else these relationships with these people wouldn't matter. -regarding purpose: for better or worse, we get to decide what we want our purpose in life to be. What do you find meaning in, even if it's something other people maybe don't? How can you take small steps, or do small things, to help build meaning into more of your every day routine? -Finally, if you're open to it, I highly recommend starting a gratitude journal and writing down 3 things you're grateful for at the end of every day. Try and make them specific to the day (I'm grateful there was a new episode of that show I'm watching on today) as opposed to generalized (I'm grateful for my family), although you can go to generalized if the day has been particularly hard. When you're depressed, your brain stops noticing the good things and will focus on the bad because it's how you're feeling. Doing this every night will start to retrain your brain to see the positives, even though that seems impossible right now. It will likely be really difficult at first, but should get easier in time. Source: am therapist, with MS, who has also been suicidal.
I feel you. Unavoidable stress sucks. My mom was diagnosed with cancer 2 years after my diagnosis. i was extremely sad and worried but i have not relapsed thankfully. it sucks that knowing you can be blind or disabled temporarily just because you showed a human reaction to a sad thing. it can seem like a silly advice but please try to not dwell about the bigger picture and take this hard times one day at a time. Just watch your favourite sitcom or feel good movie, eat your favourite food way more often,make plans with your friends. It might seem like a basic advice for this much of a dark time but this little things saved me from the darkness last year.
Keep pushing knowing that things will get better. Keep your head up and try your best to find time throughout the day to do small things that make you happy. A favourite meal, a drink with a friend, a day at the beach, a short vacation or staycation, whatever makes you happy, carve out the time and do it for yourself and come out a bit stronger… you have to find reasons to make this life worth it, they aren’t always given to you. MS won’t be the end of me because I’ve found to many reasons to push forward during the most difficult times of this disease, even if it’s 1000 pushes a day, I ain’t quitting and then I’ll wake up and do it again. Find that strength, we all have it!
In the same spot as you. The only thing keeping me alive right now are my folks, if they died tomorrow I'm probably not around next week. But they are around so I have no choice. That has kind of been the rock I've clung to in the worst times. Maybe you can find something similar? Not to be so damn cliche, try to do small little things that improve your life in ways you can. I went to the gym yesterday, it helped a little today. I cleaned my house a bit, that helped a little more. Again, I know "Just workout" is such a stereotypical response to suicidal thoughts, but little "Yeah, life sucks but at least I did that today." moments have helped me a bit. Bad comes to worse, you've always got me to be an internet stranger you can reach out to.
Hugs. For me, MS has made adverse events harder to deal with. Medication has helped everything feel more manageable.
I completely hear you and understand. There’s a song called “Harmony Hall” by Vampire Weekend with the lyric “I don’t want to live like this, but I don’t want to die.” I definitely think both things can be true on the worst days. But we keep going, and like others have said, find those little lily pads to hold onto, one day at a time. Sometimes I literally tell myself not to think, just cut the tomatoes or pet the cat and keep going. My thoughts can just make it worse. It’s very hard. And we’re doing it right now, together. <3
I’m with you. I’m divorcing, my MS feels constant, my job is wobbly, I’m focusing on my young child and his recovery from witnessing emotional and verbal abuse. I can’t leave this earth until he is an adult on his own two feet. But I would love to take the big sleep and be done here.
I went through a very dark time a couple of years ago that sounds similar to where you are. It was scary and awful and numbing, and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. I’m sorry you’re going through this. I hope you’ll stay, and I hope it gets better.
I know this is not science, but personally I experienced less pain after the mental stress calmed down. I worked a lot on breathing properly (even though you don't believe in Buddhism, they give a lot of great advice on this matter.) Also..I moved somewhere it's medium hot all year (around 25°C/68F) and near the ocean (I started swimming a lot). After 8 months I feel my pain especially, have gone down many levels. My fatigue is also better, but not as much as with the pain. In my town there is also another man with progressive MS who's in a wheelchair, and he moved her for the same reasons. He also swims a lot and he says he feels so much better than before, it's like living here has just slowed down the process. But both of us have one rule we live by, NO MORE STRESS, and we try to lessen the emotional and mental stress life gives everyone. It's a sure way to get more sick, as we see it. I wish you the best -and remember, you are a beautiful being, and even though the relationship you just were in didn't work out, there will be new love to be found, you stick it out and then you start working on healing yourself inside. The more you heal, the bigger the chance of meeting someone who is just right for you 💜
I'm so sorry for you. I've been there and let me tell ya I was afraid at first too. BUT it was one of the best things for my mind and health. I, like you, cared more about the well being of others first. But after my 20+ years marriage ended I changed everything in my life and focused, for once on me. I'm a better person both mentally and physically for taking that step. Thankfully our divorce was amicable and we are still friends today. My kids were also grown so that helped as well. This is a big step in your life and you should take full advantage of it. Turn this into a positive, focus on you. You won't be disappointed and make your life YOURS!
I'm in the same boat, asider from divorce, im single , but, i don't want to be here anymore either, not scared to go, won't do that to my kid,
Multiple sclerosis only seems like it gives the opportunity for people to say that I should "keep going'... But what the f*** does that mean anyway? Keep going? Should I be trying to become exactly like them or something? I'm not a keep going person. I'm an experience something s***** and then die from misery person. I know it sounds like I'm just negative. It's inverse and unhappy up in this. I really do just want to be balls deep in positivity for once, though.
It's up to us to bloom where we're planted. I'm so sorry your soil is just terrible right now, but it's not guaranteed to always be terrible. If you've survived this long, you've got some fighting spirit in you. Lean on that.
I’m right there with you. MS sucks, divorce sucks. This disease finds ways to crush our will to live. We each have to find what gets us through the shitty times. Plenty of posts sharing how some people get through, and maybe it can help you. The answer is different for everyone. You have to remember that within each of us is the answer. No two people experience MS the same and no two people have the same way to get through it. But we do. So will you. That’s how we give MS the finger.
988.
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\*\*Trigger Warning for some\*\* You do what you have thought about doing since the start. You sign up for the ablative aHSCT. If you're having suicidal thoughts already, then the risk of suicide is already way higher than the 1%-3% mortality rate of this procedure. For the many of RRMSers, it is by all effects and purposes a cure. Is it a sure thing? I wouldn't call 70% a sure thing but even if you're in the 30% that still progresses you will do so at a much slower rate. In a way, I'm glad my suicidal thoughts came early in my disease course because this tipped the scales of risk/reward tremendously. Doctors like to compare death rates between medicines without accounting for the risks associated with MS itself. They get to go to their normal lives after work. Many of us don't have a life to go back to.