T O P

  • By -

Cpt_Mittens

>-Im couping now. Means I rule. >-No. >-Oh, okay...


Illustrious_Mix_1064

folded under the slightest amount of pressure, how the hell did he even get THAT far.


non_depressed_teen

From what i gathered of it, he genuinely thought he was doing it for the people but when quite literally everyone, including political opponents of the current regime, opposed his coup attempt, he did the smart thing and backed off.


happy_oats

https://www.facebook.com/share/v/1GjzU1CTZ5XvurqW/?mibextid=WC7FNe local news, for those not cursed with talking spanish he's basically saying that the entire thing was meant to take attention away from the economic situation of the country. funny seeing everyone buying tons of groceries and taking as much money from ATMs as possible


N0cturnalB3ast

I can translate He says Mr el Presidente. I have put on my nicest jacket, and will not be turned away for supper for a 3rd night in a row. Then. He is dismissed.


I_LOVE_TRAINSS

I would say the same thing to save face Uh uh the leader told me to. Uh uh! He's at faul yeah yah! He told me bro we gotta make me popular again uhhh.


no_use_your_name

That makes a lot of sense.


Veritas32421

Sometimes just winging it takes you surprisingly far, I suppose 


EYPAPLQ

I just kept winging it, and it kept working


Mouse-Keyboard

Until the president said no and I gave up.


TheGisbon

I mean Pringles took Rostov on Don and when he realized he could take moscow only then did he go "wait is this really a good plan?"


LordOfDarkHearts

That dude possibly had lived longer if he followed through xD


SongFeisty8759

He looks like his mum still helps him dress..


ThePatio

Bro saw the low bar Pringles set and said, “limbo time”


SilentSamurai

He was arrested by his own soldiers. Like dude, this is coup 101.


RegicidalRogue

... arrested after they realized what he was trying to do. The mother fucker thought he could trick people instead of paying/buying them. The amount of autism is on par with me booting up HOI4 after a few Voodoo rangers.


Spoztoast

That's actually pretty common for Coup get the soldiers that just follow orders to act as if they were in on it to bolster yourself. What you don't do is bring them to the main party then show weakness.


RegicidalRogue

he was arrested by his own Special Forces, who were standing with him while giving a press conference. The first fuckers you're supposed to buy.


Ambitious_Story_47

Maybe he did and they still turned on him


pants_mcgee

This what totally a false flag, right? I’m never surprised by the depths of human stupidity but, like, c’mon.


MuzzledScreaming

>  booting up HOI4 after a few Voodoo rangers Weekend plans confirmed.


RegicidalRogue

mods never listen when I suggest we setup an NCD discord server and have a gaming section for HOI4, DEFCON, etc.


Angry_Highlanders

NCD ICBM.


RegicidalRogue

I do have ICBM. Underrated game.


socialistconfederate

Wasn't there a hoi4 player who made some propaganda videos for Wagner? I think his name was Misha or something


No-Seaworthiness1143

Grisha He was pretty funny imo (on other peoples videos at least) before he embraced the ruzzia larp


Rome453

He was also pretty funny when he started weeping upon learning about Pringles’ death.


socialistconfederate

Didn't he play with Bokoen and that crew?


No-Seaworthiness1143

Yeah he was the guy that asked “anybody want to play amongoos” after a game ended


IlluminatedPickle

Anyone got a link to a good breakdown? I'm way behind on this one.


BigChiefWhiskyBottle

Also the African Coup guys have way better drip. STEP UP YOUR GAME, AMIGO.


Odd_Duty520

Reminder to everyone that [this is how to make a coup work](https://youtu.be/CVOnA69eX2I?si=54Pt_8RhS-vPqzD8). Clowns didnt even bother to take down and control the methods of communications and expected it to succeed


saluksic

So that coup worked?


Odd_Duty520

It didn't, elizabeth told them to fuck off


LeadingCheetah2990

clubbed them to death with the septer


Odd_Duty520

Nah, the IRA did that for mountbatten


Never_Poe

first british astronaut


Never_Poe

Just read Luttwak


BDT9215

Hey now he at least got to the administrative capital


ThePatio

Well, I’m pretty sure he started in the capital.


MrCookie2099

It was at least efficient at that stage of the plan.


Nachooolo

He reached the administrative capital because no one knew what the fuck he was doing. Not even his soldiers.


donsimoni

He did down a helicopter though and conquered that one town I forgot the name of.


Unhappy-Hope

Rostov-on-Don. Largest city occupied by a russian army since 1979.


KermanElOrigen

limbo????????? 🔑🔑 🔑🔑 🔑🔑 🔑🔑


EveryNukeIsCool

Tf happened


HaaEffGee

Bolivian general launching a half-baked coup attempt. Because it's 2024 and apparently properly planned coups are just too fucking complicated now.


TheHussarSnake

The curse of Pringles.


StandardN02b

A couple days long of the 1 year aniversary. Kinda suspicious.


HybridHibernation

Damn just imagine the ghost of Pringles taking over some random general's body every 1 year anniversary and commiting a coup. That'd be hilarious.


sudo-joe

It's like the secret monkey paw. He takes over a general and attempts a coup but they all fail and the general in question will suddenly find himself freed from all of life's responsibilities within the following fiscal quarter.


ThatguyfromMichigan

And the general’s death is always some final destination shit.


sudo-joe

Sounds like an awesome movie premise. World wide dictators would probably buy several hundred thousand copies.


sockdon

So Prigozhin is literally a Darklord from Ravenloft now. I love it.


JonerThrash

Can somebody get HBO to pick this up?


_zenith

Does Eastern Orthodoxy have saints? If so, you could make him a patron saint of shitty coups or something ?


ensi-en-kai

They do , in fact the sheer amount of saints and martyrs usually flies over the head of common folk , but in Eastern Orthodox church calendar each day has some martyr and\\or saint associated with it . Plus , knowing that Ru. Church canonised tsar Nicholas II (you know , the bitch boi who danced while crowds of people were getting stomped , and whose guards literally openned fire on demonstration that chanted and honoured his name) . I am sure that in a decade of madness , we will see saint Pringles .


Gatrigonometri

Someone write an SCP on this!


sockdon

There’s a whole Dnd campaign setting about this. It’s called Ravenloft and it’s based around a ton of Darklords perpetually reliving their own failures in life like this.


White_Null

What’d you think Prighozin’s domain be like and what’d be his one weakness? PS. Falknovia of older and newer version match him somewhat~


Oh_ffs_seriously

Seeing how this one was even less effective than Prigozhin's original coup, we can only assume his power wanes. In few years, the possessed general won't even have enough balls to ask for more sugar in his coffee.


emdave

Not being able to reach the last few chips, because the can is too narrow, so tipping it up to get them, only to have all the broken bits fall out and get everywhere?


Halogamer093

What is this Pringles reference?


Dennis_Smoore

Prigozhin.


Halogamer093

Oh I see. Thanks!


D4RTHV3DA

I bet he didn't even have a fitness dancer filming the whole thing. Amateurs.


Tugendwaechter

Coups fail surprisingly often.


duovtak

Remember kids, you fail at 100% of the coups you never start.


MDemon

- Michael “Pringles” Scott


Sea-Decision-538

Coups have about a 50% success probably way less if you count those caught in the planning stages.


Apple-Dust

According to Cline Center's data set, about 44% succeed, 35% are attempted, 21% don't make it out of the conspiracy stage [https://databank.illinois.edu/datasets/IDB-8026876](https://databank.illinois.edu/datasets/IDB-8026876)


gayfucboi

so if we keep trying, the success rate goes up. let’s sigma grinder this shit


IlluminatedPickle

It's time we finally took Madagascar down a peg.


Sea-Decision-538

I figure their is probably far more that don't make it out of the planning stages but just aren't reported on.


Apple-Dust

Yea, I'm sure there are plenty of times where everyone is like "You know what? This is a really fucking stupid idea that's going to get us killed" but it's hard to draw the line there. Me and my buddies could "plan a coup" at a bar, but these were at least plausible/developed enough to get attention.


Few_Category7829

Or when they're simply executed without any public announcement whatsoever. More authoritarian governments, if the planners aren't public figures..


ratonbox

And 100% of all successful ones are blamed on the CIA.


Apple-Dust

Well duh, people having dreams and ambitions is western propaganda. No one on the planet has agency except for the CIA.


SamtheCossack

Yeah, 50% sounds way too generous. I would say about 70% of Coups that make it out of planning stages still fail, but the 30% that succeed are the ones that are remembered, due to selection bias.


IlluminatedPickle

We also remember the funny fails.


Mysterious_Silver_27

Eh it’s like 50/50, would be more likely to success if you choose a former French colony


Vysair

Yeah...Turkey


Hightide77

Guess anyone can coup now. Most liked reply decides where I coup. Note: I will fold as soon as I am told no or shown a single sign of resistance.


chance0404

Let’s see what an Icelandic coup looks like.


Strength-InThe-Loins

It would be a big Thing.


TheCreepeerster

Tonga


AmericanFlyer530

Bolivia has an average of one coup attempt every year or two.


mrfolider

It's been a tough 40 years


NotJustaPhaseOK

Calling it half baked is waaay too generous lmao


fromcjoe123

Watching the game in the current era just isnt enjoyable. These yung bloods out here be clowning on the CIA now without appreciating when they were dropping 30 a night back when the KGB was strait up throwing elbows in the paint and the UN wasn't calling shit. I mean sure, the homie is clearly washed now, but just if anything makes you respect the absolute work they were putting in in a more physical era of couping.


SilentSamurai

More credible answer: Zuniga talked shit about the President on live TV last week and got dismissed last week. So today, with what seems to be only a very small group of plotters, none of which were in key positions a coup needs, he decided to go coup attempt. From what I gather, most of the soldiers were just following orders and completely in the dark. He confronted the President in the palace, let him shout at him to send the troops back to barracks and didn't arrest him. President then got on air appealed to the country about the coup and take to the streets. Every latin american country to condemn it in record time. He appointed a new chief of the military that ordered all military back to their posts. **It also sounds like Zuniga's own soliders arrested him once they heard it was a coup.** My favorite part is that it seems like this lasted maybe 2 hours.


langlo94

He seems to have severely overestimated his soldiers loyalty to him over country.


SilentSamurai

To be fair, the coup attempt in Turkey had the same issues. Soldiers deployed to close the bridges thought they were doing an excercise until an angry mob and police made it very clear they were acting on behalf of an attempt.


RealBaikal

...erdogan is pleased with you


Selfweaver

And so we all got stuck with the current Kurd murder.


HiggsUAP

He talked about about the former president Evo and said he wouldn't allow him to become president again. That's why he was dismissed


EveryNukeIsCool

Lmfao nice


SpaceTortuga

Ñ


RealBaikal

Also a good act by the president to use it as good political pr


SyrusDrake

That's barely a coup, that's just some guy walking into the presidential palace.


ButterscotchEmpty535

Nothing. Nothing ever happens


Fghsses

Bolivian General lauches coup attempt, His forces succesfully march into the Government's Headquarters while the President is inside, President goes to meet him and talks him out of the coup attempt, He leaves.


Logical_Albatross_19

Holy shit is this fallout new vegas?


Wonderful_Test3593

Insert Lanius' departure quote


EveryNukeIsCool

Ah i see Ill take a nothingburger then Keep the something sauce out please


Wegwerf540

Nothing


Imperceptive_critic

Ever


Mowteng

Happens


Entire_Tear_1015

And I wonder


IvoryInhabitant

I wonder how? I wonder why?


DizasterAtSakerfice

If you know


IlluminatedPickle

Except that one time where that thing happened.


Jack_Church

Bro is taking Prigozhin's title of Worst Coup Ever.


Imperceptive_critic

At least Pringles shot down a bunch of Russian aircraft and managed to control a large chunk of a city


Spatza

The pringles coup, or "The one where they shot down an airborne C&C"


yellekc

Depends, if he is still alive in a year, he did better. Any coup attempt you survive is a good attempt. Prongles had a cause, loyal troops, and some real fire power, and got talked out of it by fucking Lucuckshenko. I think Pringles still dominates the worst coup podium.


Spartan05089234

Did he have it or did Turkey?


Fghsses

That belongs to the Peruvian President. There is just no beating him.


SolemZez

Nothing ever happens gang rise up


SilentSamurai

Something sure would have happened if this General spent more than 4 days planning a coup.


Pax_Cthulhiana

*'Come back later, we're watching football.'*


EpicDogeMeme

“Excuse me guys, would you oh so very kindly allow me to have a turn at being president? My mommy said one day I could be president.”


SirXavierTheDude

Ok hear me out. What if Prigozhin is like the Harambe of coups and from now on the coups will get worse.


Vampersand720

was not the old meme _"With this character's death, the thread of prophecy is severed."_ or something?


Mariechen_und_Kekse

Not sure if that's a meme, but it was in divinity original sin


PM_ME_UR_CUDDLEZ

This might be the Neo Cold War, but Putin has jack shit in Money while the Biden is putting all his money creating Liberty Prime


Banjo_Pobblebonk

Well I'm not getting my dick out for him.


H8Hornets

How do you half ass a coup?


sentinelthesalty

Ask pringles.


H8Hornets

He’s currently…. occupied … unlike the kremlin.


NTeC

You go to bed with a coup and wake up without a coup


VladimirBarakriss

You forget to check of your soldiers are loyal to you


eyydatsnice

"We could have done this coup by email" -one of his soldiers(probably)


hugh-g-rection551

this is all because chef blyatardee fucked up his coup attempt. ​ now all the wanna be coup comitters think they can get away with it if they just pull the plug before finishing the thing.


Zestyclose_Jello6192

I wouldn't say that getting shot down while on a plane is getting away with it.


hugh-g-rection551

he didn't know at the time he would be getting shot down in a plane. chef blyatardee genuienly thought he got away with it.


Vysair

Which is pretty stupid considering your leader track record of assassinating your political enemies


hugh-g-rection551

yeah, i never claimed he was smart.


Correctedsun

Ok, I can't be the only one who thought dude on the left was 95% neck.


Kaiser_Maxtech

i didnt realize he wasnt until i read this. thought he just had goiters or some shit


VV1TCI-I

I know I thought that too...


dragos412

"Boring ass coup, should have stayed home."


NonFuckableDefense

How did me shitting my guts out at work today last longer than a fucking coup? With how low effort it was I am shocked we can even meme about it without breaking the rules.


burt____reynolds

-100000 aura


TheManUpstairs77

Bros trying to make Wildlands a thing and forgot about 25 steps.


emdave

Plot for Wildlands 2? :D Anything would be better than the hot mess that was Breakpoint... :/


mdradijin

Thats what happen when CIA doesnt support a coup. Até this point we can create Pringles Coup Championship of worst coup attempts


Nikolai_perkin_03

Bolivian here who was like three streets down of la plaza murillo... yeah nothing ever happens


Rat_Ship

“Go back to your room” “but mooooooom”


Cboyardee503

At least Mishima had the balls to kill himself after the crowd boo'd him offstage.


MainsailMainsail

Okay but in fairness he was probably rock hard at the thought of killing himself after a failed coup


WhoThisReddit

''Does this scarf make me look fat?''


AwkwardDrummer7629

That is an extremely unfortunate scarf.


SteelyDan1968

I Fucking knew Pringles was still alive!!!


Crazyceo

Left photo makes it look like he has insane neck fat rolls


ChemistRemote7182

People make fun of Africa for being behind the curve, but they've kept to the old ways. They have a solid belt of successful coups.


linfakngiau2k23

I don't know man. Sudan turns into a shitshow after the coup.


butt_huffer42069

Everywhere in Africa turns into a shit show after the coup. Then they have a whole ass new coup to fix that. Thus the cycle of life renews thru coups.


Vysair

They will keep couping to recoup the previous coup losses


Pappa_Crim

CBS is speculating that this might be a "Self Coup" as noncredable as that sounds


fromthewindyplace

Dammit, I was going to make this exact meme.


CheesecakeVisual4919

Nah. That still belongs to Prigozhin. At least this clown made it to the palace.


ThePeterPhantom

But only to get told "No" and "You’re fired"


Entire_Tear_1015

This dude started of in the city he was couping. Pringle had a far better mileage


thefluffyparrot

Can I cross “coup somewhere” off of my ww3 bingo card or does the coup actually have to be successful?


Mysterious_Silver_27

Now if only he had read the book of our sponsor: Coup d'État: A Practical Handbook Revised Edition! Now available on Amazon for only 20.95, and you too could become the military dictator of Bolivia!


caribbean_caramel

Skill issue.


dogoodvillain

*NOOB*


OldSkoolPantsMan

Gave my man the frowning of a lifetime, and he decided to turn heels and bail.


VladimirBarakriss

Fun fact, in its 199 years of history as an independent country, Bolivia has had 35 coups counting both failed and successful, this is basically Tuesday for them


StandardN02b

Someone double check the pizza metter.


slick514

I thought that that… scarf (?) was his neck…


Thehyperninja

Why does bro have such a fat neck Edit: i may be high


Vysair

Blud just has terrible fashion sense


Forkliftapproved

I thought he had a quintuple chin for a moment


ViolinistPleasant982

Dudes scarf should not be skin colored. Thought it was edited to make him look like he had 4 chins but nah he is just that dumb.


WeBredRaptors

I FUCKING LOVE POLITICAL UPHEAVAL IN BOLIVIA. Every time I visit, some group or another is rioting, blocking roads, burning shit, or clashing with MPs. Last time it happened when the feds arrested the head of the opposition party, and his constituents went ape shit in the streets of Santa Cruz. Saved my ass from a week with a Tinder hookup who turned out to be psycho.


XtraFlaminHotMachida

Since Jan 6th its really been shit for dudes attempting coups.


Lothian_Tam

Eh, lets be fair, the yin that got done in Turkey a few years ago was even mair half arsed. At least these guys tried tae at least gank the president.


Wonderful_Compote_51

WHY HIS NECK UNCIRCUMCISED?????


Pinesse

👌👌👌 Is this the weirdest salute or what.


TheOnlyFallenCookie

Bro forgot to tell them soldiers they doing a coup


Unhappy-Hope

Is this a thing now - regular worst coup competitions?


Slavstic

Someone forgot to watch the ordinary guide on how to coup any country


Frog_Yeet

Bro looks like a worm


ZonaranCrusader

Wagner type shit


Neutral_Memer

Definitely not me tryna figure out wtf happened with his neck


supa_warria_u

biggest let down since piggoswine


Difficult-Start-9288

The guy has no neck!


TheOnlyFallenCookie

Bro forgot to tell them soldiers they doing a coup


[deleted]

[удалено]


AutoModerator

This post is automatically removed since you do not meet the minimum karma or age threshold. You must have at least 100 combined karma and your account must be at least 4 months old to post here. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/NonCredibleDefense) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Skyhawk6600

I thought his scarf was a double chin for a moment


Farseer_Del

Flew the coup. Man, if I had a dollar for every time someone did a pathetic attempt to overthrow a government I'd be annoyed as I live in the UK and it's like, five dollars, it's barely worth it to get it exchanged, add the fee it's like £3 left, and I spend that much just going to the bureau de change. Utter malarkey. 


ChipmunkStrong3752

The summer coup of 2025 will last half a day. They'll see the government cafeteria opened up and go there. Then they close the cafeteria with them inside and they get reprimanded.


LaughGlad7650

Pretty sure some African or Middle East general can start a better coup