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Women. Plain and simple because we are just that. Beautiful, smart women who wouldn't accept those terms and lower herself by submitting to an old fart of a backwards thinking obsolete manchild.
Right? Then "ReAL MeN" can just go ahead and earn the entire paycheque themselves.. no need for my help - Thanks for bringing in all the bread babe, here's a sandwich.
In actual patriarchal cultures, this doesn't work like this. The man is supposed to provide for the entire family and *if* the woman works, it's all hers. It's considered a shame for a man if he needs a woman to add money to the household. I think this is how Islam handles it.
Yes, in Isalm a man has to provide for his wife and she does not have to work. It is his duty. If she does work, her money is hers to keep. His money is the family's money while her money is hers to keep.
literally they want a traditional wife without being a traditional husband! And then complain there are no good humble women left so they don’t have to face the fact *they* are the problem
Exactly! And if said traditional woman wants a man who can provide for her to stay at home then she is a gold digger. But if he wants a submissive women he's just an alpha male.
Fr 😭 likes it’s all transparently a ploy to normalize abuse and coercive control in relationships for the benefit of as many men as possible, and I don’t understand how more people aren’t seeing past all the bs??? Mind numbing fr
this is super annoying ik, but saying “some men” instead of “men” is such a small thing that makes such a difference in that statement. i respect tf out of that
They would both mean the same thing in this context though. It's blatantly obvious they're not talking about every single man in existence, if you feel attacked by a vague encompassing statement maybe you should consider why.
In islam, the wife also has to allow the husband to have as many wives as he likes and have a triple talaq, i.e he can say Divorce Divorce Divorce in Arabic and now she's no longer his responsibility. Not to mention she has to clean the house and cook as that's her duty as a wife.
Don't like islam so much now, do you?
Lol, you write this like I am not aware.
He can only have up to 4 wives. If he divorces her she is entitled to the full payment of her mahr if it wasn't already paid. A women has no financial responsibility, so another male family member (father brother son) would have to take care of her. If you don't work, you should cook and clean.
I love Islam Alhamdulillah.
Right and in a *lot* of households like that women may not earn the money but they are managing it as a part overall homemaking and and house hold duties.
Why tf would I give the money (I earned!) to my husband for him to give it *right* back to me when I’m managing the bills, groceries, and household family necessities? Unless he was trying to financially abuse me, it’s so incredibly inefficient it wouldn’t even last for a year into the marriage.
Whoever the fuck is making posts like this have never actually been in a partnership like this and fucking *shows*
Yep! My mom was a SAHM of the five of us kids. My dad worked. My mom ran the household, managed the finances, paid the bills and did all of the shopping. She had all the money for 20+ years.
In my household, my husband and I both work and I have all the money. I manage the finances and give him an allowance. He does all of the household chores when he’s home from work and I do them all when he’s gone (he’s gone two weeks, home two weeks) so it’s all fair.
In traditional Japanese families, while the man makes the money, the woman manages the family finances and gives the man his allowance. At least, that’s how my grandparents’ home in Japan worked, and I think it was normal.
I remember reading, years ago, a book that mentioned an old joke along the lines of “Why do Japanese women walk behind their husbands? Because their pockets are so full of money” in reference to exactly what you mentioned. (I’m of European descent so I have no personal experience to verify, but I think about this often!)
Not just Japanese culture either. This was a big part of historic “Viking” (Dane) culture, since they saw money-managing as women’s magic. Which I still think is neat, because it was my mom that taught me all about stretching cash at the store. Same energy. I was so impressed she could calculate it all in her head, it seemed magical.
I knew that it's common in traditional Japanese families, but viking culture?! That sounds so amazing! I think I heard somewhere that some people in nordic countries still do that, and I think it's quite interesting \^\^
There was a Honeymooners episode where Ralph was begging Alice for some money for his lodge dues and she told him that was suppossed to come out of his allowance
My ex is muslim. While we were happily-ish married he gave me £70 a month which was supposed to be to di whatever with. He had a figurine addiction and one day he said "does the £70 not cover it" I was having to add quite a bit to his hobby. He was shamed quite a bit when we parted ways. If he does marry again I'm wishing him the best of luck.
Correct. Part of why teenage me was so harsh to my dad. “You wanted a SAH wife. Why are you complaining about her lack of funds? If you wanted a career wife, you should have helped her go to college.” It’s just … obvious. If you want a SAH wife to raise your kids, you better make enough money to keep the household running. Making a wife go to work, when women get far less education/opportunities, and then taking the money is obscene.
For reasons, I left that culture, but it’s still bizarre that so many men think they can have it both ways. No education/opportunities or work experience—but also a high-paying job worth more than childcare/school fees. How? In what world?
In old Viking Age Scandinavian society; women handled finances. Men contributed to the household funds and income, but women were in charge of the household and every aspect that comes with it. In other words, men gave their money to the women and earned an allowance.
The simple, and hilarious, answer is that mathematics was considered a type of magic and only women were allowed to practice magic. Men were executed for doing it. Often burned at the stake actually.
Also, ownership of things was divided like this. Men owned the land, women owned the home.
Well, if they can't provide on their own but still want a slave who's dependent on them because she doesn't have her own money, then I guess this would look like a good solution to the dilemma...
Well now the man doesn't have to earn money and the woman has to earn it twice. It's a win win Situation. The man wins twice and women aren't human beings anyway so who cares.
It took me a moment to wrap my head around it, but no literally. In slavery you don’t count as an autonomous person; everything you earn is the property of your master. You have to obey them etc… oh noo
💀Its just glorified slavery
As a guy, reading that makes me feel similarly.
My girlfriend’s “former friend”, who earned that title by deliberately cutting out anyone from her life who wasn’t a married, Christian couple when she got married, has this arrangement with her husband. She is the primary breadwinner, but none of her money is hers. They’re also not particularly financially stable, despite her having a good job, so it’s not like her husband is some sort of financial whiz.
The whole thing is, without a doubt, one of the stupidest things I’ve ever heard.
That literal doesn’t even make sense 😭 how is she doing the “masculine” task breadwinning without the benefit of actually having financial independence and security. All of the work and *none* of the benefits. They have got it so twisted, if they are so worried about living as god intended then what is this?
I think that these are the exact kind of questions that they have to insulate themselves from “secular” couples to avoid, lest we dare ask “dude, why is he in charge of the money *you* make?” while we’re “living in sin”, right?
I don’t know this for a fact, but I find it hard to believe that the burden of cooking and cleaning is shared evenly in that household.
yeah, my wusband actually tried every three months, like clockwork, to demand that he be in charge of all the money. My money as well. He would be pissed if I bought our kids clothes, too much spent on groceries, that I had nice clothes, and desperately needed to know how much my checks were. But for him? His money was his to spend as he pleased, on you guessed it; himself. He would have thousands of dollars in a box in his room, but if I had a dollar it must be spent first. He would be pissed if I spent money on flowers for the yard. He's the wusband for a very good reason. I refused to give him that power over me. I now actually have a nice house and a fat savings account, without him.
Hmm, curious. In the 1950s they so idolized, it was the reverse. The man worked, made the money, and the wife took care of all the finances since she was in charge of the household duties. Then she'd budget out his spending money. He typically never even looked at the bills, grocery costs, etc since that was her work. But ig these days ladies have to both be breadwinners AND housewives.
THIS. So many men have benefitted from a woman running finances their whole lives (first mommy and later wifey) that so many of them don't know how to file taxes or manage an account.
This is exactly how it was in my grandparents' household. My grandfather was a civil engineer and he brought home his paycheck every week and she handed him some cash to last him the week and she took the rest of it. They also owned two rental homes and she took care of all of the income and expenses for those.
My ex-husband was a spendaholic and couldn’t manage money to save his life. If we’d done this we probably would’ve ended up in debt and homeless because he bought himself a bunch of toys instead of paying the rent.
“It’s fine they’d never evict a family” WOW that is stunningly delusional (im sorry if that comes of as rude I literally can’t think of another word rn to save my life)
Yeah, I know.
He wanted new and better sails for his boat, is the context for the quote.
Luckily for my mother, she never merged economies with him (or anyone else).
My wife and I combine our paychecks, and she pays the bills. She also makes significantly more than me, and is better at keeping track of those things.
Neither of us get 'allowances'.
But sure, I'll tell her that I'm the man and should be in charge of everything from here on.
Somewhat similar over here. My wife and I have entirely shared financials. She's also the bigger earner. There is no hers and mine. We share banks, credit cards, stocks, 401k, loans... everything. The only difference is that I handle all the bills, shopping, saving, etc. She's never been great with money and doesn't want the responsibility. I, on the contrary, have always been good with money management and responsible spending/saving. It was an arrangement we arrived at together.
We both have spending limits, but it's not really an allowance so much as "this is what's left over" or "this is what we agree is acceptable to spend without communicating with the other". Large purchases are made (or sometimes not made) together.
This is what my husband and I do, but I manage the money. We each have a set amount we can spend as we please so I give him that and keep the rest. We discuss any purchases over $X amount together before either makes them, as well (outside of things within the tight budget I run that aren’t set bills, like groceries and pet food, lol).
My mom did this, she was a subservient wife, she never hung out with men unless my dad was there, she was modest and went to church. My dad still cheated on her and had a kid with a younger woman. Ladies, don't degrade yourselves
AcTuAlLy, it's a historically age old custom for the Man to bring the Woman his salary so She could spend it on the household and their life while He gets a very limited budget. House maintenance is expensive, life is expensive, want kids dear husband? Expensive. Why? So the only thing the man Has to do is work. The woman does Everything else.💃🏻
Now for the kicker. The country **Most Famous Today** for that practice? Their favourite! 🎉 **JAPAN!** 🎉 Yaaaaay! You get an allowance, and you get an allowance, all the boys get an allowance! 🤣
Also common in post-war Britain, especially in the working classes. Besides bus money, Grampa (father's side, mechanic for Rolls-Royce in Stevenage) got the price of his weekly tobacco and a pint of beer at the local. Everything else went through Gramma before it happened.
God alone knows how he ever saved for Christmas and Birthdays.
Ah yes. The perfect sign of male dominance. Relying on your woman to give you their hard earned money so that you can sit on your ass and buy beer and lottery tickets. Very alpha. /s
Ironic how these right wingers keep saying people have to do x, y, and z to "be a real woman" or "be a real man", implying that if you fail to do these things, you aren't a real woman or a real man.
Then they turn around and tell trans people that they are "really just a man" or "really just a woman" and there's nothing that they can do to change that.
So I guess in their world, gender is something that is assigned, not chosen, but you still need to earn it to have it.
In many cultures, it is often the opposite: the woman controls the spending. I'm not saying that's good or bad. In a way, you could call it conflict reduction. I know they don't care about the facts, but there they are.
Right. You make trade-offs. If I give all of my wages to my partner to manage the money, I don’t have to worry about managing the money very much. I get to skip out on certain responsibilities, but I have less control. We all have our own styles.
My very biggest ick in the world is when creeps sabotage a pic of a normal woman and photoshop some insane crud like this on to the picture. I honestly feel like maybe it would be more respectful to this gal to repost this with her face blurred, as she probably didn’t consent to having this message associated with her on the internet 🤮
Honestly I have ADHD and impulse spend really bad. I’m in a ton of debt. I can’t budget to save my life. If I had a partner who wanted to take that mental load off me and manage our finances while I took over some other aspect of managing our lives for him that he didn’t excel at but I did, I’d be like “oh thank god” lol.
Just make it a partnership, don’t give away your power
Don’t listen to the other commenter I understand this a personal anecdote about your own preferred relationship dynamic lol (*everyone* should get to make their own rules in their relationship as long as they respect other couples right to do so)
And I get it have I have adhd too and get the impulse buying itch all the time, it’s only my financial anxiety and special interest in personal finance that keeps me from destitution 😭
I love this and I’m glad that works for you! I swear my own personal niche interests are all that keep certain aspects of my life from destruction
Like my cats in better health than I am because she’s catered to and pampered because, niche interest lol. I totally get it
This was pretty much the point I was trying to make in my own comment. In before I bumbled through it so badly that it gets downvoted to heck...
And feking ***same*** how does a budget work?? Stupid magic plastic card and auto-pay for bills are just too terribly convenient for my bad spending habbits, likely caused by my ADHD 😑
ETA: okay, logically yes, I do know how a budget works, but
my brain: "ain't nobody got time for that!!" and "Shiney!!! We wants!! We must have the Precious!!!"
Dude seriously, like I sit down with a budget sheet and that low dopamine task is just…. I do not have the executive function for it. I don’t. I can’t bear the mental load of that particular labor and if there’s too much month at the end of my month as a result… well then I guess I’ll cry idk
My fiance and I operate off the same concept. He is more comfortable managing our finances than I am and it gives him peace of mind to know where the money is going savings wise. We BOTH get "allowances" and the rest of both our incomes go to our bills and savings. It's a team effort, having one person take care of finances isnt a power struggle for us.
I.... *think* they may have been implying that you're a man and/or assumed in general that you were using the ADHD as an excuse? IDK... a lot of people in my life try to say I use my ADHD as an excuse as well, and it's like, "you really think I *choose* to struggle with things like this?!"
Oh lol yeah I was so confused because I’m a cis woman and also not a victim? I just think divisions of labor make sense
I had roommates for many years and we always split chores and labor according to our respective strengths and no one was a victim 😂
Ugh. Reminds me of my dad telling my mom that he “lets her keep her money” that she earns from HER job. 🙄 Men feel entitled to everything from a woman.
Edit: Spelling
I work hard at my job for my money. My husband works hard at his job for his money. We have shared household expenses & separate personal expenses. This here is just a big ole nope.
This is pretty much why conservatives hate the LGBTQ community so much. Because the community is practically built on living outside the traditional gender and family norms that’s been pushed on society for so long. Gay men are proof you don’t need to dominate a woman to be manly, and lesbians are a defiance of the belief that women’s choices revolve around what men want. Trans/non-gender conforming/non-binary break the mold of rigid gender stereotypes.
Imagine going through the process of getting a job and showing up to work and then when you get your reward you have to give it to your husband because they have a penis and you don't I advise nobody does this it's not worth it if you have a joint bank account or something like that then thats different but what this person is suggesting is just not fair
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
FUUUUUUCK no. I'd be living on the skreets if I let my second husband handle *my* money, too. Wouldn't own a home outright, at best. He couldn't spend it fast enough!! Any "extra" money in his pocket meant he'd buy something he didn't need, like two expensive saws; I think he used one of them once. A digital camera we did not need, video games, piles of nose candy. (The last item he thought he could hide from me, but when he'd spend hours in the en suite bathroom, I knew. I'm not exactly stupid.) Sending money to a "damsel in distress" former classmate who was in a "bad relationship." (At the time, I was just hoping he'd leave and go be with her.)
In my current situation, we make rational decisions *together*, but he prefers I do the majority of the financial stuff, because I've had more experience. I stopped receiving an "allowance" when I was around ten years old.
I ain’t no lady, I am a married man and that’s the dumbest thing I’ve read today. Ladies, keep your money away from your man. If you’re married, and there are no issues that concern you (red flags) and your both financially responsible, then combine a portion for your shared expenses. Always have some direct deposited in an account only you have access to. This is brainwashing.
Real men don't need to control their women (and make it impossible to leave them) by controlling their wife's money. If a woman works, she gets to keep her damn check, just like the "real" men that I'm sure are keeping theirs. The only justification for a situation like this is if one partner asks the other to hold onto their money because they're terrible with it, and that's only when the check is volunteered, not demanded to be handed over. This "real man" is committing and suggesting domestic violence.
If you replace man with cat then I agree. After the mortgage is paid to house the cat, after food is bought, utilities paid, and new toys are purchased then I get what is left over.
The only time you give MOST of your money to your partner is if they are better at financing shit.
My bf gives me most of his money, he keeps about 15% of what he makes a week, because he knows he's impulsive as shit and he'll spend it without meaning too. So it goes into my bank account and his credit card has a max of 50$ per spend
That's how you ACTUALLY use yall money correctly
1. The woman in the picture isn't even holding the sign. It's been Photoshopped over her.
2. For the MAN who clearly came up with this idea: Yeah, no. I already earned the whole check.
Lol no. where man is earner all money goes to wife since she takes care of household (aka food shoping kid clothes his clothes her clothes cleaning supply gifts etc) there is no point in man hoarding money for himself. He is working for family so he should give family this money.
If men dont like this they can start thinking ahead what to eat what to buy what to clean but they hate using their brains for that
Nope. Nope. Nope. Oh hell no.
No smart woman would ever do this. It’s an open invitation for him to manipulate and abuse you. Why on earth offer him a major means of controlling you?
My ex tried that and finally succeeded with some help from the social security administration and an imaginary “official policy”. He was so controlling and bad with the money there was always money for whatever he wanted but often not enough for groceries or even laundry. Yeah, this one of the long, long list of reasons why we’re divorced and he ended up on the other end of a restraining order.
To this day, I don’t let anyone else have access to any of my accounts. Too many men (though not just men) are awful with money and as my ex proved, sometimes they have an ulterior motive in it.
Good people discuss and make financial decisions together with their partner in order to make sure that whatever conclusion they reach in the end is something they can both agree on.
Hahaha no. I was the only one earning a paycheck the last 11+ years of my relationship. I don't think this asshole would even get an 'allowance' from me with an attitude like that. Thank fuck my SO isn't like this.
My mother used to do this back in the 60’s. She made more money than my father did. She said that was just how it was and I told her then I would have not gotten married. My question is if women were not allowed to have bank accounts back then how did they stay single and live in their own apartments? And what about widows? It all just sounds very rude to me.
This reminds me of a weird dynamic some sex workers have where some of them actually go out of their way to find a man to be their pimp even though they could just do the whole operation by themselves and keep all the money. I feel like this is some kind of phycological issue and not something that should be encouraged.
I've always had my own money since I earn more than the ex. I earned, on average, almost $70,000.00 per year alone while the ex earned at best $36,000.00, so I never needed his money, so getting a divorce was hard on me but not nearly as bad as it was for him. This is why I'm happier single. That way, I don't have to worry about a man trying to take my money.
Why tf would you make money to give to someone else just so they can give a fraction of it back? You already have an allowance, it's called your paycheck and your personal budget. I don't get how a "real woman" would imply they don't know how to manage their own money
In actual patriarchal societies and back in olden times, such men these days would be ripped to shreds by actual patriarchal men.
A lot of these men these days want a traditional wife but aren’t traditional men themselves. They really think that they would’ve thrived in the “good old days.” They don’t realize that back then, everything financial and professional fell on the man. Also, these men don’t realize that they would be booted to the bottom of the bottom of the courtship pool by their fellow men. A woman’s father would never allow her to marry these loser men because these men have nothing to offer and will choose a man that they can merit from.
I knew a couple where it was the other way around. Husband gave her all the money cause he was bad at keeping up with bills. So she’d handle the bills out and then give him what’s left of his pay.
I think one person handling someone’s money is unhealthy in a relationship, regardless of which gender is holding the money. Joint accounts can cause arguments too.
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Well "real women" can just suck my ass then. I'm keeping my moolah.
My thoughts exactly. Another thing to add to my list of Not Woman
What term will all of us fake women give ourselves? Because only someone completely brain dead would be ok with this malarkey
I doubt this woman created the text on the image? I assumed someone just made this without her permission because it's so dumb.
Oh it’s very obviously a ‘shop job.
Women. Plain and simple because we are just that. Beautiful, smart women who wouldn't accept those terms and lower herself by submitting to an old fart of a backwards thinking obsolete manchild.
Winners. Because we've won the war of wits with our less bright sisters.
Vaginites?
Right? Then "ReAL MeN" can just go ahead and earn the entire paycheque themselves.. no need for my help - Thanks for bringing in all the bread babe, here's a sandwich.
In actual patriarchal cultures, this doesn't work like this. The man is supposed to provide for the entire family and *if* the woman works, it's all hers. It's considered a shame for a man if he needs a woman to add money to the household. I think this is how Islam handles it.
Yes, in Isalm a man has to provide for his wife and she does not have to work. It is his duty. If she does work, her money is hers to keep. His money is the family's money while her money is hers to keep.
I remembered correctly then. This is how this system is supposed to work, not exactly what some men want.
Yea, some of them want the benefits of a traditional wife and the benefits of a modern wife...basically the wife gets screwed lol
literally they want a traditional wife without being a traditional husband! And then complain there are no good humble women left so they don’t have to face the fact *they* are the problem
Exactly! And if said traditional woman wants a man who can provide for her to stay at home then she is a gold digger. But if he wants a submissive women he's just an alpha male.
Fr 😭 likes it’s all transparently a ploy to normalize abuse and coercive control in relationships for the benefit of as many men as possible, and I don’t understand how more people aren’t seeing past all the bs??? Mind numbing fr
Seriously. I think this is why my mom says men should always pay for everything. She's on to the bs 🤣🤣
this is super annoying ik, but saying “some men” instead of “men” is such a small thing that makes such a difference in that statement. i respect tf out of that
They would both mean the same thing in this context though. It's blatantly obvious they're not talking about every single man in existence, if you feel attacked by a vague encompassing statement maybe you should consider why.
no no no i’m not offended. it’s just really exciting when ppl don’t take shots they could have taken
Well obviously right wing asshats with incel brains are a minority, I hope even on Reddit.
In islam, the wife also has to allow the husband to have as many wives as he likes and have a triple talaq, i.e he can say Divorce Divorce Divorce in Arabic and now she's no longer his responsibility. Not to mention she has to clean the house and cook as that's her duty as a wife. Don't like islam so much now, do you?
Lol, you write this like I am not aware. He can only have up to 4 wives. If he divorces her she is entitled to the full payment of her mahr if it wasn't already paid. A women has no financial responsibility, so another male family member (father brother son) would have to take care of her. If you don't work, you should cook and clean. I love Islam Alhamdulillah.
Right and in a *lot* of households like that women may not earn the money but they are managing it as a part overall homemaking and and house hold duties. Why tf would I give the money (I earned!) to my husband for him to give it *right* back to me when I’m managing the bills, groceries, and household family necessities? Unless he was trying to financially abuse me, it’s so incredibly inefficient it wouldn’t even last for a year into the marriage. Whoever the fuck is making posts like this have never actually been in a partnership like this and fucking *shows*
I was going to say exactly this. These people want traditional wives without the work of being a traditional husband. They want slaves not wives.
Yep! My mom was a SAHM of the five of us kids. My dad worked. My mom ran the household, managed the finances, paid the bills and did all of the shopping. She had all the money for 20+ years. In my household, my husband and I both work and I have all the money. I manage the finances and give him an allowance. He does all of the household chores when he’s home from work and I do them all when he’s gone (he’s gone two weeks, home two weeks) so it’s all fair.
In traditional Japanese families, while the man makes the money, the woman manages the family finances and gives the man his allowance. At least, that’s how my grandparents’ home in Japan worked, and I think it was normal.
I remember reading, years ago, a book that mentioned an old joke along the lines of “Why do Japanese women walk behind their husbands? Because their pockets are so full of money” in reference to exactly what you mentioned. (I’m of European descent so I have no personal experience to verify, but I think about this often!)
Not just Japanese culture either. This was a big part of historic “Viking” (Dane) culture, since they saw money-managing as women’s magic. Which I still think is neat, because it was my mom that taught me all about stretching cash at the store. Same energy. I was so impressed she could calculate it all in her head, it seemed magical.
I knew that it's common in traditional Japanese families, but viking culture?! That sounds so amazing! I think I heard somewhere that some people in nordic countries still do that, and I think it's quite interesting \^\^
There was a Honeymooners episode where Ralph was begging Alice for some money for his lodge dues and she told him that was suppossed to come out of his allowance
That’s what’s so pathetic about it. They want to be patriarchal but not do the work of being patriarchal
My ex is muslim. While we were happily-ish married he gave me £70 a month which was supposed to be to di whatever with. He had a figurine addiction and one day he said "does the £70 not cover it" I was having to add quite a bit to his hobby. He was shamed quite a bit when we parted ways. If he does marry again I'm wishing him the best of luck.
Correct. Part of why teenage me was so harsh to my dad. “You wanted a SAH wife. Why are you complaining about her lack of funds? If you wanted a career wife, you should have helped her go to college.” It’s just … obvious. If you want a SAH wife to raise your kids, you better make enough money to keep the household running. Making a wife go to work, when women get far less education/opportunities, and then taking the money is obscene. For reasons, I left that culture, but it’s still bizarre that so many men think they can have it both ways. No education/opportunities or work experience—but also a high-paying job worth more than childcare/school fees. How? In what world?
In old Viking Age Scandinavian society; women handled finances. Men contributed to the household funds and income, but women were in charge of the household and every aspect that comes with it. In other words, men gave their money to the women and earned an allowance. The simple, and hilarious, answer is that mathematics was considered a type of magic and only women were allowed to practice magic. Men were executed for doing it. Often burned at the stake actually. Also, ownership of things was divided like this. Men owned the land, women owned the home.
I just commented with the same info. Twins.
https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/viking-textiles-show-women-had-tremendous-power/
Oh snap, ya just made them all embarassed with that comment
You can't eat the cake and keep it.
In fact, the Koran specifically permits women to own property. Muslim women had this right well before western women were “given” the same right.
So why was it taken away?
In fact, if a woman gives money to her husband to help with expenses, she is considered to have given to charity on her spiritual accounting ledger.
Yep that's the catholic way. So the woman can't stash some to be able to escape.
Wait I thought one of the benefits of being owned by a man was not having to work ...
Different times. This is the modernized version.
This is stupid they made it worse
Well, if they can't provide on their own but still want a slave who's dependent on them because she doesn't have her own money, then I guess this would look like a good solution to the dilemma...
Well now the man doesn't have to earn money and the woman has to earn it twice. It's a win win Situation. The man wins twice and women aren't human beings anyway so who cares.
The stupidest part of these modern “tRaDiTioNaL vAlUeS” people is they get traditional values wrong 100% of the time like you can’t have it both ways.
That's just slavery with extra steps...
I think that’s slavery with no additional steps.
Lol at having to earn money twice, once at a job and then a second time 'earning' an allowance. Ridiculous.
And still have to do 100% of the housework/child rearing. Super fun!
Came here to say just that. Unhinged.
Yeah it's literally financial abuse
THIS. I was in a financially abusive relationship, and this is exactly what it is.
It took me a moment to wrap my head around it, but no literally. In slavery you don’t count as an autonomous person; everything you earn is the property of your master. You have to obey them etc… oh noo 💀Its just glorified slavery
Reading that makes me fighty
As a guy, reading that makes me feel similarly. My girlfriend’s “former friend”, who earned that title by deliberately cutting out anyone from her life who wasn’t a married, Christian couple when she got married, has this arrangement with her husband. She is the primary breadwinner, but none of her money is hers. They’re also not particularly financially stable, despite her having a good job, so it’s not like her husband is some sort of financial whiz. The whole thing is, without a doubt, one of the stupidest things I’ve ever heard.
That literal doesn’t even make sense 😭 how is she doing the “masculine” task breadwinning without the benefit of actually having financial independence and security. All of the work and *none* of the benefits. They have got it so twisted, if they are so worried about living as god intended then what is this?
I think that these are the exact kind of questions that they have to insulate themselves from “secular” couples to avoid, lest we dare ask “dude, why is he in charge of the money *you* make?” while we’re “living in sin”, right? I don’t know this for a fact, but I find it hard to believe that the burden of cooking and cleaning is shared evenly in that household.
Can’t have people asking questions about how it all works lest they have doubts or a crisis of faith.
If someone has to insulate themselves in an echo chamber in order to avoid a crisis lf faith, then their faith isn't very strong to begin with.
yeah, my wusband actually tried every three months, like clockwork, to demand that he be in charge of all the money. My money as well. He would be pissed if I bought our kids clothes, too much spent on groceries, that I had nice clothes, and desperately needed to know how much my checks were. But for him? His money was his to spend as he pleased, on you guessed it; himself. He would have thousands of dollars in a box in his room, but if I had a dollar it must be spent first. He would be pissed if I spent money on flowers for the yard. He's the wusband for a very good reason. I refused to give him that power over me. I now actually have a nice house and a fat savings account, without him.
'Wusband" - I love that!
My girlfriend calls me wusband/wubby as a genderneutral term of affection
Does she though? ;) /s
Hmm, curious. In the 1950s they so idolized, it was the reverse. The man worked, made the money, and the wife took care of all the finances since she was in charge of the household duties. Then she'd budget out his spending money. He typically never even looked at the bills, grocery costs, etc since that was her work. But ig these days ladies have to both be breadwinners AND housewives.
THANK YOU!! They know nothing about the actual day-to-day operation of the golden age they want to return to so badly
I think this is pretty much how it is in Japan. Housewife is the one budgeting.
THIS. So many men have benefitted from a woman running finances their whole lives (first mommy and later wifey) that so many of them don't know how to file taxes or manage an account.
This is exactly how it was in my grandparents' household. My grandfather was a civil engineer and he brought home his paycheck every week and she handed him some cash to last him the week and she took the rest of it. They also owned two rental homes and she took care of all of the income and expenses for those.
My ex-husband was a spendaholic and couldn’t manage money to save his life. If we’d done this we probably would’ve ended up in debt and homeless because he bought himself a bunch of toys instead of paying the rent.
My father apparently did the same. "It's fine, they'd never evict a family."
“It’s fine they’d never evict a family” WOW that is stunningly delusional (im sorry if that comes of as rude I literally can’t think of another word rn to save my life)
Yeah, I know. He wanted new and better sails for his boat, is the context for the quote. Luckily for my mother, she never merged economies with him (or anyone else).
Very astute of her. It’s sucks but always gotta have a backup plan. You never know what’ll happen or how people will change up on you 😕
Do we have the same ex?
My wife and I combine our paychecks, and she pays the bills. She also makes significantly more than me, and is better at keeping track of those things. Neither of us get 'allowances'. But sure, I'll tell her that I'm the man and should be in charge of everything from here on.
Keep us updated on how that goes! /s
She would laugh, hand me all the bills and the password book, and wish me luck. "If you can find an allowance for me in there, I'd be thrilled"
Somewhat similar over here. My wife and I have entirely shared financials. She's also the bigger earner. There is no hers and mine. We share banks, credit cards, stocks, 401k, loans... everything. The only difference is that I handle all the bills, shopping, saving, etc. She's never been great with money and doesn't want the responsibility. I, on the contrary, have always been good with money management and responsible spending/saving. It was an arrangement we arrived at together. We both have spending limits, but it's not really an allowance so much as "this is what's left over" or "this is what we agree is acceptable to spend without communicating with the other". Large purchases are made (or sometimes not made) together.
This is what my husband and I do, but I manage the money. We each have a set amount we can spend as we please so I give him that and keep the rest. We discuss any purchases over $X amount together before either makes them, as well (outside of things within the tight budget I run that aren’t set bills, like groceries and pet food, lol).
Yeah you better! It’s what god intended! / s
My mom did this, she was a subservient wife, she never hung out with men unless my dad was there, she was modest and went to church. My dad still cheated on her and had a kid with a younger woman. Ladies, don't degrade yourselves
AcTuAlLy, it's a historically age old custom for the Man to bring the Woman his salary so She could spend it on the household and their life while He gets a very limited budget. House maintenance is expensive, life is expensive, want kids dear husband? Expensive. Why? So the only thing the man Has to do is work. The woman does Everything else.💃🏻 Now for the kicker. The country **Most Famous Today** for that practice? Their favourite! 🎉 **JAPAN!** 🎉 Yaaaaay! You get an allowance, and you get an allowance, all the boys get an allowance! 🤣
Yep, the Vikings did this too, because math was witchcraft.
To be fair, vikings were super progressive for the time
Also common in post-war Britain, especially in the working classes. Besides bus money, Grampa (father's side, mechanic for Rolls-Royce in Stevenage) got the price of his weekly tobacco and a pint of beer at the local. Everything else went through Gramma before it happened. God alone knows how he ever saved for Christmas and Birthdays.
Real man earn their own paycheck and don't ask a woman to give them their paycheck! You're not our pimps!!! 🙄
Ah yes. The perfect sign of male dominance. Relying on your woman to give you their hard earned money so that you can sit on your ass and buy beer and lottery tickets. Very alpha. /s
Financial abuse/control is a recognised form of abuse under UK law
Ironic how these right wingers keep saying people have to do x, y, and z to "be a real woman" or "be a real man", implying that if you fail to do these things, you aren't a real woman or a real man. Then they turn around and tell trans people that they are "really just a man" or "really just a woman" and there's nothing that they can do to change that. So I guess in their world, gender is something that is assigned, not chosen, but you still need to earn it to have it.
Glad I'm not real then. I'll happily make my money, spend it how I want- then let some guy take me to dinner and I buy the show tickets.
nah, I gotta keep my entire paycheck to spend on kpop makup and weed...living my dream life.
I am passing you the dutchie on the web hand side.
Real women don’t hold Photoshopped signs created by men. Nice try, incels.
Mmmmm no, no that doesn't sound right at all.
You can frick right off with that bullpoop. I work hard for my money, no way am I giving it away to anyone. I’d rather burn it and starve.
In many cultures, it is often the opposite: the woman controls the spending. I'm not saying that's good or bad. In a way, you could call it conflict reduction. I know they don't care about the facts, but there they are.
Heck considering the woman is the one running the household she’s the one budgeting the money for things like groceries, clothes, school supplies etc.
Right. You make trade-offs. If I give all of my wages to my partner to manage the money, I don’t have to worry about managing the money very much. I get to skip out on certain responsibilities, but I have less control. We all have our own styles.
My very biggest ick in the world is when creeps sabotage a pic of a normal woman and photoshop some insane crud like this on to the picture. I honestly feel like maybe it would be more respectful to this gal to repost this with her face blurred, as she probably didn’t consent to having this message associated with her on the internet 🤮
Yep it looks like a photoshop job to me. Not fair to have that woman's face next to a message she most likely doesn't agree with
Oh hell no this is insanity
Honestly I have ADHD and impulse spend really bad. I’m in a ton of debt. I can’t budget to save my life. If I had a partner who wanted to take that mental load off me and manage our finances while I took over some other aspect of managing our lives for him that he didn’t excel at but I did, I’d be like “oh thank god” lol. Just make it a partnership, don’t give away your power
Don’t listen to the other commenter I understand this a personal anecdote about your own preferred relationship dynamic lol (*everyone* should get to make their own rules in their relationship as long as they respect other couples right to do so) And I get it have I have adhd too and get the impulse buying itch all the time, it’s only my financial anxiety and special interest in personal finance that keeps me from destitution 😭
I love this and I’m glad that works for you! I swear my own personal niche interests are all that keep certain aspects of my life from destruction Like my cats in better health than I am because she’s catered to and pampered because, niche interest lol. I totally get it
This was pretty much the point I was trying to make in my own comment. In before I bumbled through it so badly that it gets downvoted to heck... And feking ***same*** how does a budget work?? Stupid magic plastic card and auto-pay for bills are just too terribly convenient for my bad spending habbits, likely caused by my ADHD 😑 ETA: okay, logically yes, I do know how a budget works, but my brain: "ain't nobody got time for that!!" and "Shiney!!! We wants!! We must have the Precious!!!"
Dude seriously, like I sit down with a budget sheet and that low dopamine task is just…. I do not have the executive function for it. I don’t. I can’t bear the mental load of that particular labor and if there’s too much month at the end of my month as a result… well then I guess I’ll cry idk
My fiance and I operate off the same concept. He is more comfortable managing our finances than I am and it gives him peace of mind to know where the money is going savings wise. We BOTH get "allowances" and the rest of both our incomes go to our bills and savings. It's a team effort, having one person take care of finances isnt a power struggle for us.
Love this! I hope to find someone like that one day. I keep hoping my cat will step up but so far, no dice 😂
Probably for the best, cats are bad with finances.
dude, take that male victim mentality shit someplace else, lol.
Male victim mentality? I don’t understand
I.... *think* they may have been implying that you're a man and/or assumed in general that you were using the ADHD as an excuse? IDK... a lot of people in my life try to say I use my ADHD as an excuse as well, and it's like, "you really think I *choose* to struggle with things like this?!"
Oh lol yeah I was so confused because I’m a cis woman and also not a victim? I just think divisions of labor make sense I had roommates for many years and we always split chores and labor according to our respective strengths and no one was a victim 😂
As someone who was a victim of financial abuse, I will never not have my own income and bank account
Um no. Go be a pick me somewhere else.
Don't we call that practice ***prostitution?*** Because that sounds like more like prostitution than a patriarchal family.
Ugh. Reminds me of my dad telling my mom that he “lets her keep her money” that she earns from HER job. 🙄 Men feel entitled to everything from a woman. Edit: Spelling
Yea I’m pretty sure that’s just financial abuse…
thats the relationship between a pimp and a sex worker
I’m Korean , men give all their money to their wives and get an allowance because she manages the household money
Real women lift up other women and help them kick guys like this to the curb.
Why can’t relationships just be free? Like I don’t mean that in the sense where you don’t spend a dime on each other but why is it a requirement?
I work hard at my job for my money. My husband works hard at his job for his money. We have shared household expenses & separate personal expenses. This here is just a big ole nope.
This is pretty much why conservatives hate the LGBTQ community so much. Because the community is practically built on living outside the traditional gender and family norms that’s been pushed on society for so long. Gay men are proof you don’t need to dominate a woman to be manly, and lesbians are a defiance of the belief that women’s choices revolve around what men want. Trans/non-gender conforming/non-binary break the mold of rigid gender stereotypes.
Imagine going through the process of getting a job and showing up to work and then when you get your reward you have to give it to your husband because they have a penis and you don't I advise nobody does this it's not worth it if you have a joint bank account or something like that then thats different but what this person is suggesting is just not fair
"Thoughts ladies *dumbass emoji*" I can hear the echo of his thoughts made in his empty skull.
This is almost certainly rage bait.
Give me one reason why I'd want to be a "real woman" in their book ;D They really think their opinions matter, huh?
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 FUUUUUUCK no. I'd be living on the skreets if I let my second husband handle *my* money, too. Wouldn't own a home outright, at best. He couldn't spend it fast enough!! Any "extra" money in his pocket meant he'd buy something he didn't need, like two expensive saws; I think he used one of them once. A digital camera we did not need, video games, piles of nose candy. (The last item he thought he could hide from me, but when he'd spend hours in the en suite bathroom, I knew. I'm not exactly stupid.) Sending money to a "damsel in distress" former classmate who was in a "bad relationship." (At the time, I was just hoping he'd leave and go be with her.) In my current situation, we make rational decisions *together*, but he prefers I do the majority of the financial stuff, because I've had more experience. I stopped receiving an "allowance" when I was around ten years old.
 Hear that women? Go find yourself a pimp. /s
Hell nah keep your money. We split bills but that's your money
I’d rather be single than degrade myself to be financially abused again
Guess I'll be a fake woman then cuz fuuuuuuuck that 🤣🤣🤣
If you're broke just say that sir 🙄
>earn an allowance Excuse the fuck out of you, I earned my paycheck from working at the fucking job.
I ain’t no lady, I am a married man and that’s the dumbest thing I’ve read today. Ladies, keep your money away from your man. If you’re married, and there are no issues that concern you (red flags) and your both financially responsible, then combine a portion for your shared expenses. Always have some direct deposited in an account only you have access to. This is brainwashing.
Real men don't need to control their women (and make it impossible to leave them) by controlling their wife's money. If a woman works, she gets to keep her damn check, just like the "real" men that I'm sure are keeping theirs. The only justification for a situation like this is if one partner asks the other to hold onto their money because they're terrible with it, and that's only when the check is volunteered, not demanded to be handed over. This "real man" is committing and suggesting domestic violence.
HAHAHAHAHA.
Ok. I’ll play along. Real men earn enough so their lady doesn’t have to. And he gives her an allowance.
I'm not a real woman apparently, maybe I'm a microwave.
If you replace man with cat then I agree. After the mortgage is paid to house the cat, after food is bought, utilities paid, and new toys are purchased then I get what is left over.
That's like 3/4 of pimping.
Sounds like financial abuse.
This is propaganda by the national pimping lobby
That's called financial abuse and it's designed to keep you too poor to leave.
The only time you give MOST of your money to your partner is if they are better at financing shit. My bf gives me most of his money, he keeps about 15% of what he makes a week, because he knows he's impulsive as shit and he'll spend it without meaning too. So it goes into my bank account and his credit card has a max of 50$ per spend That's how you ACTUALLY use yall money correctly
So I earn that money at work and now I have to earn it back? Fuck you I'll just be single then.
Guess I am an imaginary woman now!
Very insecure men obviously
I’m not real, that’s neat.
Actually this is how prostitution worked in the seventies.
1. The woman in the picture isn't even holding the sign. It's been Photoshopped over her. 2. For the MAN who clearly came up with this idea: Yeah, no. I already earned the whole check.
Yeah, poor lady having her face associated with this bullshit without her knowledge. Hopefully most people realize...
Real women maintain control of their dowry and leverage it against their husband’s holdings to establish a lasting dynasty.
Lol no. where man is earner all money goes to wife since she takes care of household (aka food shoping kid clothes his clothes her clothes cleaning supply gifts etc) there is no point in man hoarding money for himself. He is working for family so he should give family this money. If men dont like this they can start thinking ahead what to eat what to buy what to clean but they hate using their brains for that
Allowances, last time I checked, were for *children*.
A pimp wrote this?
Nope. Nope. Nope. Oh hell no. No smart woman would ever do this. It’s an open invitation for him to manipulate and abuse you. Why on earth offer him a major means of controlling you? My ex tried that and finally succeeded with some help from the social security administration and an imaginary “official policy”. He was so controlling and bad with the money there was always money for whatever he wanted but often not enough for groceries or even laundry. Yeah, this one of the long, long list of reasons why we’re divorced and he ended up on the other end of a restraining order. To this day, I don’t let anyone else have access to any of my accounts. Too many men (though not just men) are awful with money and as my ex proved, sometimes they have an ulterior motive in it.
Good people discuss and make financial decisions together with their partner in order to make sure that whatever conclusion they reach in the end is something they can both agree on.
Well now I wanna know what lesbians are supposed to do
Well, they just added a crap text over whatever was really there. So I wanna know what the sign actually said more than anything else.
Hahaha no. I was the only one earning a paycheck the last 11+ years of my relationship. I don't think this asshole would even get an 'allowance' from me with an attitude like that. Thank fuck my SO isn't like this.
This meme maker had never been with a real woman, regardless how you define “real women” here.
Isn't this just slavery?
As a man and a husband. Ain't no damn way!
“ThOuGhTs?” Like this shit warrants discussion. Jesus fucking Christ man
My mother used to do this back in the 60’s. She made more money than my father did. She said that was just how it was and I told her then I would have not gotten married. My question is if women were not allowed to have bank accounts back then how did they stay single and live in their own apartments? And what about widows? It all just sounds very rude to me.
Never, ever, will I do that.
I agree with most of the post on here, yea I know it’s satire but there’s some truth to it but this is just too much.
Uh yeah fuck that
“Real women give their entire paycheck to their portion of the bills and take an allowance” fixed it
This reminds me of a weird dynamic some sex workers have where some of them actually go out of their way to find a man to be their pimp even though they could just do the whole operation by themselves and keep all the money. I feel like this is some kind of phycological issue and not something that should be encouraged.
Ummm..........no? What the hell? How low of a self esteem and self worth do you have to have as a woman to do this?! What the fuck!
I've always had my own money since I earn more than the ex. I earned, on average, almost $70,000.00 per year alone while the ex earned at best $36,000.00, so I never needed his money, so getting a divorce was hard on me but not nearly as bad as it was for him. This is why I'm happier single. That way, I don't have to worry about a man trying to take my money.
Hahaha, that is funny satire. Real talk: get fucked, my money is mine.
I actually give my wife my paycheck and I get a certain amount every week, she is amazing at budgeting and I am not so much. It works great
Why tf would you make money to give to someone else just so they can give a fraction of it back? You already have an allowance, it's called your paycheck and your personal budget. I don't get how a "real woman" would imply they don't know how to manage their own money
Damn right, where are all the “real” women at!?!? I got bills to pay and stuff.
Bet his desired nickname is Gator
Then I’m happy to remain fictional
Well that’s moronic
My allowance is the entirety of my paycheck that doesn't go towards bills.
In actual patriarchal societies and back in olden times, such men these days would be ripped to shreds by actual patriarchal men. A lot of these men these days want a traditional wife but aren’t traditional men themselves. They really think that they would’ve thrived in the “good old days.” They don’t realize that back then, everything financial and professional fell on the man. Also, these men don’t realize that they would be booted to the bottom of the bottom of the courtship pool by their fellow men. A woman’s father would never allow her to marry these loser men because these men have nothing to offer and will choose a man that they can merit from.
"Is that so? You earn so little that without her wage you won't get by?" should shut him up...
Then, real woman doesn't exist
*Laughs in breadwinner*
Not in my house. My wife has her own account. And when she needs moneys, I happily Zelle it to her. My money is hers.
I give all my money to my wife and she gives me an allowance. I’m fucking terrible with money.
Not in Japan
I knew a couple where it was the other way around. Husband gave her all the money cause he was bad at keeping up with bills. So she’d handle the bills out and then give him what’s left of his pay. I think one person handling someone’s money is unhealthy in a relationship, regardless of which gender is holding the money. Joint accounts can cause arguments too.
Should be the opposite.