T O P

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TerrorEyzs

I ate too much garlic once. I had found some freeze dried fried garlic things marketed as "snacks." I downed the equivalent of probably 4 bulbs of garlic.  I was very sick for around 4 days. Vomiting, chills, diarrhea, body aches, sweating, everythjng. It was awful.  My husband had been out of town at the time and when he got home I was finally beginning to feel better. He kept walking around the house wondering what smelled so bad. Like something sour and rotting. I couldn't smell anything.  He gave up trying to figure it out, showered, and got into bed with me. As soon as he did he about vomited. It was me. And yes I had already changed the sheets and showered since I had been sweating the whole time he was gone so I wanted it all to be clean for him.  Don't eat too much garlic lol.


NoPerformer4456

I can’t stop laughing 🤣


pacollegENT

I peed a little


HugeFinish

I spit garlic all over my keyboard


BongwaterJoe1983

Op is doin more than that 🤣


pastelstoic

This is something that would 100% happen to me. It still might.


Aggleclack

My concern is also that these stories won’t stop me from doing it too


DeathwatchDave

I’m gonna do it on purpose


Suspicious-Thing-750

Heard this in Jason Mantzoukas' voice. Lol, thank you.


sunjellies24

Scientific process demands more experiments be run! I'll join you and we can compare our data


Jennifer_Pennifer

This is almost as good as the sugar-free gummy bear review from Amazon 😆


Crotean

Never heard of this one. Got a link?


BrewsCampbell

[https://www.amazon.com/review/R2JGNJ5ZPJT4YC](https://www.amazon.com/review/R2JGNJ5ZPJT4YC) Here you go.


Little-Pea-8346

"By question 14 my worst fear was upon me; the Satan bears' burning, hot, liquidy dark magic crashed against my anal sphincter like a tidal wave. I was able to close the hatch just in time, but those relentless, toxic bears beat against it like Orcs breaking down the doors of Helm's Deep."


zukadook

Pure poetry


Little-Pea-8346

This person must have been an English/creative writing major for sure, just flexing.


holymoo

Blazing poo-etry


Crotean

I'm crying 🤣


Jennifer_Pennifer

Ty 👍


TerrorEyzs

Ha! No way that was gold!


JadedYam56964444

Lose weight fast through massive diarrhea


Bilbo_Teabagginss

"Doctors hate this one weight loss secret"


acidmahoan

“wondering why the house smelled so bad” is INSANE 🤣 really though that sounds awful. they really make just freeze dried cloves? thanks for the story though 🤣


TerrorEyzs

Haha yep! It was [these fuckers.](https://www.heb.com/product-detail/sunrise-natural-foods-garlic-snax/1219667) They were super delicious but NEVER AGAIN!


DifficultAd7053

“Anytime. Anywhere”


Xenc

“Simply garlic.”


Skc143psu

“REFRIGERATE AFTER OPENI”


Xenc

`SNAP EBT eligible`


notsetvin

Tax payer approved!


InitialThanks3085

Here Everything's Bubbleguts


Funfetticookies3

Serving size 24 pieces good lord


ShoogarBonez

A “serving size” is *twenty-four pieces* 🥴


Therealishvon

How much did you eat of that again? I want to try it lol just don't what to eat too much! Lol


notsetvin

Maybe some people dont have those affects? Maybe you must be part vampire?


dm_me_kittens

I ate two bulbs of garlic once when I was sick. I had heard garlic was good for fighting illnesses, so I baked one with olive oil, then just crushed and swallowed the other one raw. My farts were now mustard bombs.


LittleBunnySunny

..but were you still sick?


Motivated79

I can eat too much garlic AND onions? That’s a thing what the hell. My gf isn’t lying when she says my pits smell like onions then


TerrorEyzs

Mine always smell like garlic and onions too.


Straxicus2

Oh my gosh I can’t stop laughing!


creampiebuni

That sounds more like you had food poisoning badly timed with the garlic snacks, lol.


TerrorEyzs

I agree. But also I had the symptoms of garlic poisoning which I had no idea was a thing.


_summerw1ne

Have genuinely never heard of this in my life and can’t believe it. Luckily for me a don’t have to because I’ll inevitably forget until it happens to me.


DudeB5353

Oh man the pain you must’ve been in…I’ve had food poisoning once and literally thought I was going to die for about 2 days.


lordofpersia

Have you considered the possibility that you are a vampire?


mastershake20

Not my ED brain tucking this information away for desperate times.


Hot_Obligation_2730

Omg years ago I went to a Garlic Festival and they had a garlic eating competition and ever since I’ve been so mad I got there too late to enter. Suddenly I’m not so sad about it anymore. I think the winner ate like 30-50 cloves (like I said it’s been years. I can’t remember exactly but it was A LOT) of garlic in 2 minutes. I can’t imagine what they went through afterwards


Tugboatbetty

I came here to tell this same story!! Bought freeze dried garlic in the bulk section and snacked on it for a few hours. I was out of work for the next day, same symptoms. Those things should come with a warning label. They’re too delicious!


Momsomniac

My husband ate 2 bulbs of roasted garlic once. His sweat reeked of rotten garlic. I had a doctor appointment the next day and he came with me. It was a hot day and when the doctor finally walked in to the enclosed room and smelled the air she gave me the most concerned look. I pointed right to him and said he is the smell I’m just here for my bad back pain. We all had a good laugh.


___mads

One time when I was in college, i convinced my partner to buy a head of elephant garlic and a baguette, roast the garlic, and have just that on the baguette for dinner. It was so yummy! Who doesn’t love roasted garlic? The next day in one my classes, my teacher took our class (about a dozen students) into a tiny supply closet to talk about supplies for the majority of class. And then the farts set in. Classic silent-but-deadly type. I couldn’t contain them. I tried my hardest. I couldn’t excuse myself because the material we were covering was too important to the remainder of the semester. No one said anything to me about it, thank god, but I’m still MORTIFIED to think of it. It was HORRIBLE. I’m glad you made it out alive. My experience wasn’t nearly as bad as yours, but I’m still MORTIFIED by the


anetworkproblem

Lmao


Risky_Bizniss

When I was younger, I had heard that garlic was good for you, so I decided to eat one raw clove PER DAY. Not a lot. Still, my significant other at the time let me know I smelled horrible. I cannot imagine what you went through


Maw_153

Four bulbs!? Damn


errihu

I grow my own garlic and it’s so damn amazing that I have to keep myself from eating too much, or it’s carnage. Garlic is powerful stuff!


UndeadBuggalo

I had no idea garlic gave you the DT’s and made you smell like rotten garbage water, garlic yes, rotten, no 😂


DMMeBadPoetry

Least stinky girl you meet at a bar


GraatchLuugRachAarg

So it's basically poison in large amounts? I wonder how much would kill a human adult


Lewd_Pinocchio

I often make spaghetti Aglio e Olio when my roommate is gone for a day or more. It’s so damn delicious and easy, but precise to make. I use about three full bulbs of garlic. Garlic lightly sautéed until lightly golden brown, add chili flakes, mix in my noodles and starch water to emulsify the oil, add my fresh Italian parsley, a squeeze of fresh lemon, cracked black pepper, and kosher salt. Then I blaze a spliff in three pulls, eat the whole damn dish, and rip ass all night and the next day. I leave the windows open and a fan on so the smell doesn’t settle. The cramps at first are uncomfortable but once you start farting nonstop you’re all good. It’s like someone hooked up an air compressor to a tuba. Then again cooked garlic isn’t as bad as raw freeze dried garlic. That sounds so righteous.


Soggy_Reserve5232

Chubby emu story 😂


NecroFoul99

I used to make an easy garlic dip for potlucks and it was always a fan favorite. 2 days fermentation and that dip could melt steel, yet I’d still grub it down. I OD’d on garlic like you did and I never truly recovered from it. I can barely tolerate garlic now. Just a little bit can make me feel pretty uncomfortable. A strong onion does the same thing to me. Whenever I see posts like this I just want to say, ‘good luck. You may think your garlic invincible, but…’


cheeselikethebri

When I was 13, I tried roasted garlic for the first time after growing up in a family who only used jarred minced garlic and garlic powder. My cousin told me to eat it on a cracker like dip. My mind was blown, it was heaven. I couldn’t stop myself and ate nearly a full bulb on my own. Luckily I didn’t get sick like you described, but the SMELL coming from me. Ohhh the smell. Thank goodness it was spring break and I didn’t have to go to school.


SnarlingLittleSnail

I like to slice the onions thinner so I can slither them down my throat like serpent worms.


BGWeis

what…?


The_Bingler

#I like to slice the onions thinner so I can slither them down my throat like serpent worms.


BGWeis

oooooohh, okay. thanks!


alilbleedingisnormal

I have a hard time hearing too


Fishmonger67

I’m sorry. Did you say something?


Jarbonzobeanz

WHAT?


stinkyhooch

CHOCOLATE!!!


Jennifer_Pennifer

#no it's onions!


stinkyhooch

Now introducing… Chocolate covered onions with a caramel truffle core!


MammothPrize9293

You said, FUNIONS?


toothpastenachos

#THEY HAVE A HARD TIME HEARING, TOO


EnglishPatientZero

This conversation completes me.


GlitteringFee9515

it makes more sense when you put it that way


puffbunz

Ya I like u


Bongfellatio

Our top story tonight with Garrett Morris of the New York School for the Hard of Hearing


Phikep

Epic 😂😂😂


SnarlingLittleSnail

Something that looks like this, [https://youtu.be/PTpPJm6fouE?t=45](https://youtu.be/PTpPJm6fouE?t=45). I like to imagine it is this, I close my eyes and imagine them slithering down and around my throat.


rlsav99

Thanks, SnarlingLittleSnail


KentuckyFriedEel

Please confess this to a priest! Your soul is unclean


Ok_Zebra9569

Lmao


alotofbaboons

Hilarious, yet admirable description of your happenings


qetalle007

r/BrandNewSentence


peanutleaks

Are awards not a thing anymore on Reddit? I was gonna give you one


2pickleEconomy2

You’re eating worms, Michael.


p0rt23

https://www.reddit.com/r/TikTokCringe/s/8LpRGap2z1


fkndemon23

Yum


Sverker_Wolffang

Father of toxic gas and chemical warfare


maeerin789

The onion or OP?


Sverker_Wolffang

Yes


acidmahoan

🤣


deadheadism

There is a fine line. Any time I’d feel a sore throat coming on, my mam would slice or crush some raw garlic to hold in my gums for a few hours. It destroyed whatever illness was coming on… I was in disbelief that it actually worked as a teenager, because another one of her home remedies was rubbing poitín on the soles of your feet. I use the garlic solution to this day, unfortunately don’t have access to poitín anymore as I emigrated- classic irish L


TayTaay

His dark creation has been revealed


dirtydirtyowl

r/unexpectedsabaton


Hexxas

You're gonna smell terrible tomorrow morning LOL


larakj

The allium sweats!!


jdaburg

You misspelled "im starting to smell the after effects".


acidmahoan

🤣🤣🤣


cant__find__username

Onions on an empty stomach are a bad idea. Definitely delicious


Deviiray

Oh yeah, I've eaten a plateful of fried onions as a meal. Slight buyers remorse..


deadheadism

Same, especially since I heavily undercook them


devangs3

Pure alliums can cause this to you, pair it with bread or other carbs or proteins.


FearingPerception

Ah so thats why i also got the shits bad when i ate most of a raw/ceviched onion for dinner


ApprehensiveAd9014

What did you marinate them in?


FearingPerception

Lime juice!


hey_mr_crow

Diarrhea


acidmahoan

thank you for this! someone else said something similar so i’m going to try that next time.


Therealluke

You will be sweating that out of your pores tomorrow.


Taco-Bob

You fuckin did what? 💀


acidmahoan

💀🤣


Rustymetal14

Your poor coworkers


Lopsided_You3028

What like youre cumming too much?


Paindaddy69

Mix in a pineapple to make it… interesting?


muricabrb

Mmm the awesome flavor trifecta that is pineapple, garlic and onions. YUM!


stinkyhooch

Would definitely eat that on a pizza


The_Eternal_Valley

After action report necessary


Practical-Design-391

I gotta get outta this cursed sub. 🙃


ColdBorchst

I didn't even join, it just gets pushed to me because I keep looking at this content but like why. I like onions too but why are people just eating whole plates of onions _with a god damn **spoon?!**_


Gerolanfalan

Tbh, these people are impressive. I love my onions, but some people here are straight up heading to veganism with all the pure onions they eat.


ColdBorchst

I can't get over that the only thing well rounded about this meal is the spoon.


acidmahoan

this made me laugh out loud 😂


ColdBorchst

Thank you, you wonderful maniac. I love this post and I was hoping my comment wasn't seen as mean.


acidmahoan

not at all! 🤣💕🧅 gave me a laugh.


KentuckyFriedEel

You should get onion super powers any minute now


acidmahoan

i’m becoming more and more attractive by the minute 🧅


breadpudding3434

Farts must be crazy


kahn-suleyman90

Just puts some hot pomegranate sauce and coriander and it's fine


acidmahoan

hot pomegranate sauce sounds delicious


ApprehensiveAd9014

Oh the rumbly in the tumbly from your delicious meal. I'm farting in solidarity. Tastes delicious but they exact a fee from you in sulfurous vapor.


acidmahoan

farting in solidarity 😂


karamel826

That looks so good


acidmahoan

sooooo so good


BadNewsBearzzz

Lol it’s all good and worth it bro, you’ll be fine. Garlic is fucking amazing with ANYTHING, onions are Devine but garlic is an incredible flavor enhancer


acidmahoan

lmfao thank you! appreciate you 😂


Whoopsy-381

That looks to me like a little creature made of onions and garlic. Anyone else see that?


maeerin789

This guy gets it.


notaregularmum

Jesus. At least have some buttered bread to put that on top of


skullbuddy

One time I made tomato soup and instead of just using one small bulb of regular garlic I bought the giant bulb of elephant garlic because it made more sense in my mind, money wise. Anyway.. I’ve never cooked with elephant garlic before. I cut the top off the entire bulb and tossed it on the baking sheet with the rest of the ingredients to bake for my soup. I then proceeded to blend everything up and when I had my mom try my soup her mouth quirked like the cop from dumb and dumber after he drank the bottle of piss. I essentially made a tomato soup concentrate that could then only be added in small parts to new tomato soup.


Inevitable_Silver_13

This is the first time I've seen this sub and this post made me laugh harder than I have in months.


ZeusMcKraken

Detox.


GuthramNaysayer

A clear case of gassum ad nauseam.


Beeboobumfluffy

Pappa Nurgle approves of the bloated gas monster you will be tomorrow morning.


acidmahoan

yeah i woke up w a painful bubble in me


Future_Way5516

Are you hearing colors yet?


acidmahoan

pretty close 😵‍💫


[deleted]

How the fuck do you eat garlic raw I tried it once and burned my tongue!!


acidmahoan

roasted w olive oil in tin foil!


Drifting-Fox-6366

I eat a ton of onion and garlic all the time. I will mix two whole sautéed onions and 5 sautéed bulbs of garlic with jasmine rice, EVOO, and pepper. I love it! I think because I mix it with rice I don’t get the negative side effects.


acidmahoan

i will definitely try rice next time 😂


Ok-Leadership-5056

Looks sooo good.


N8torade981

After effects? Like… An increase in dopamine? Euphoria? Eternal orgasm syndrome?


acidmahoan

all of the above


malvinavonn

My bf and I recently made roasted onions, garlic mashed potatoes and asparagus. It’s the anti-date-night-trifecta. We both regretted it the next day.


Paper_Clipps

r/Wario


TheCoyoteDreams

I ate 4-florets of baked garlic once b/c my date didn’t like it…and I loved it! I found out later you CAN eat too much garlic. I couldn’t get away from myself. It was oozing from from my skin, and oh gods the farts 🤢 for 3-4days


Reef14909

Mmmm looks yummy


Personal_Win_4127

Finally, my people and a meal fit for a king to boot.


49264028

i bet your breath smells like diesel


turtletoes67

One time we Roasted a mess of regular garlic bulbs . We ate it all & wanted more but only had bulbs of Elephant Garlic ,so we Roasted those. Omg the next day was so gnarly. The most putrid Farts & the smell seeped from our skin. Was terrible & funny as hell at the same time.


anonymousshitpostr

It looks really good although I can imagine the tummy ache after 😭


acidmahoan

yeah i couldn’t stop going to the bathroom for a little bit but i’m surprisingly fine this morning. my girlfriend says i have extremely strong garlic breath too.


An-Ocular-Patdown

You must have the Kavorka


acidmahoan

what is the kavorka


deadheadism

2 entire bulbs is impressive, hats off. Pants and sheets off too


acidmahoan

lmfaoooo you have no idea 🤣


bigb4134

You bout to have a rumbly nose-burp that vaporizes every single follicle of nose hair


acidmahoan

my girlfriend said my breath is burning her nose


JadedYam56964444

Must be date night


Minute_Story377

I know my stomach would hate me but this probably would taste delicious 🤤


Embarrassed-Two-399

Accidentally cooked a turkey with a bulb of garlic not knowing what a clove of garlic was…😅 lesson learned! 🙃


TimeKiller1850

I call that tummy gurgles.


Volleyfield

We have that snowman village plate set but we only use them during Christmas.


SayRomanoPecorino

This would be my hell. The devil spoon feeding me this. What I could get down without gagging, anyway. Well, I’m glad you enjoyed it, you are going to reek for a few days no matter how good your hygiene because that shit will seep out of your pores. Different strokes 🤢


the-b1tch

This looks like one of those deceiving dishes that appears to be super plain, bland, no color and then you eat it and are pleasantly surprised by how good it tastes. Only for your digestive system to get hit by the Mac truck of gurgles and you spend the night praying for the release of your stomsch from the demons.


hobocrippin

Why was I about to cook this earlier fuckkk 🤤


SantiProGamer_

alright, wario


MinionofMinions

Vampires ain’t got nuthin on me!


jeffdill2

This picture is giving me reflux.


Inevitable_Ad_7236

I have learnt to not give in to the wonderful smells of fried onions. They taste alright, but smell so much better


Aggressive-Error-88

I would be down for this with some protein.


acidmahoan

i agree. i was gonna get a steak but the farmers market closed by the time we made our rounds. or sausage would be good.


Skylizard1223

Well that bulb of garlic is definitely gonna clear out any viruses in your system


Stormwolf1O1

On the plus side you will have absolutely no problems deterring vampires


pickle_diet_coke

Shrek-core


GuerillaCupid

Based


Call_Me_Doctor_Worm

I'll never forget the heinous gas I got after being really broke and thinking an onion omelette with nothing else would make a good breakfast ☠


telepathicavocado

One time my fiance made us roasted garlic to snack on while we watched Buffy. I couldn’t even focus on the show because my stomach hurt so bad


Sweaty-Reputation-34

I’m crying and wheezing !


Sweaty-Reputation-34

Omg , crack a window .


MayaMythical

I love garlic. I like to make garlic confit and spread it on crusty bread and end up eating like 5-6 cloves at a time but damn it makes my sweat stink and gives me mad diarrhea


diadlep

Inlaws coming?


ABbackintheday

Farts so hot and repetitious that you get up to turn the heat down.


Unlikely-Cry-7007

Why omgosh why 😭


phiqzer

Reminds me of the time at work I ate an entire pound of roasted garlic for lunch. That was it. It seemed like the thing to do at the time. And since my schedule was empty I was rewarded with the rest of the day off.


SolherdUliekme

I ate 2 whole bulbs of garlic the day I got my little ceramic garlic roaster thing. Didn't really feel bad, but had some REALLY loud farts for like 3 days lol. Didn't smell any worse than normal, but the loud farts just kept coming. Good luck OP


OakFin13

When I discovered roasted garlic I ate so much one night. Like we made multiple heads and I just ate tons with bread. The next day I was literally sweating garlic out of pores. I went to work and tried to casually stay like 10 feet away from everyone when talking. The receptionist was very sweet and gave me tic tacs when she noticed


BushwickSpill

Bro busted out the Xmas china and had girl dinner on his bed.


ToferLuis

After effects? You mean obscenely violent blood farts?


Alternative-Top6882

I think I'm done internetting today. Bye


cherrygirlbabycakes

If my mom and I eat too much garlic or onions, our vaginal discharge and sweat will smell like it for a week 😂