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r2k398

That’s why I’m glad I met my wife the old fashioned way…..in person.


dugongone

I tell you, I envy you. So much. Lots of women get addicted and never stop swiping. They even ask you to be exclusive, but then they keep using the damn apps


r2k398

This was before online dating was as big as it is now.


_jay_fox_

And before elite tech controlled human interactions!!!


Luciansleep

I mean I can easily say a lot of dudes also want a fantasy. I’ve seen many dudes want women they have nothing in common with just because she’s attractive. If these people are going beyond their means. Let them. Either they get with them or not but at the end of the day that’s all you can do, just moving on with your life.


Gold_Supermarket1956

Honestly, that's a both sexs issue, no one dates with a purpose.


Luciansleep

Now a days? I’d say I agree. Seems like too many people are just using people


Gold_Supermarket1956

I wouldn't say using, but dating is for sure transactional now


Luciansleep

I’d agree. It seems like people will go back to dating for convenience rather than love


Swimming_Policy3629

They can't do that because women work. They would have to take back women's rights for it to be convenient for them to date for transactional purposes again


AMC2Zero

When women are allowed to earn their own paycheck, men become less appealing.


Swimming_Policy3629

Yes. According to my Google research women being educated and having rights is the main reason for the rapid birth decline that Elon says is a bigger threat than climate change


AMC2Zero

It's only a threat to Elon because he can't rely on a forever increasing underclass to grow his wealth infinitely. I notice how he doesn't push for ANY social policies that would make it easier for people to have children or offer up some of his own money.


Luciansleep

Things are more transactional. “What do you bring to the table”


dugongone

Women still get free meals every time. Travelers even get free accommodation without even needing to do anything sexual


Swimming_Policy3629

>Women still get free meals every time. >Travelers even get free accommodation without even needing to do anything sexual Where?


dugongone

>Women still get free meals every time. Most men pay for dates... >Travelers even get free accommodation without even needing to do anything sexual You'd know if you were a solo traveler..


Swimming_Policy3629

I've traveled more than most I've met according to them


Fair-Bus-4017

It definitely isn't as transactional as it used to be. For ages women needed men. A good example of this would be that women weren't allowed to own a credit card without their father, brother or husband co-signing it. The fact is that in today's age women don't need men to live their life. Hence why men nowadays need to actually put in some effort. The women of today don't have to settle.


Long-Manufacturer990

But the thing is that woman dont become more atractive the more money they make, so their real choices on men pretty much stay the same so you still have to be realistic. Well maybe if you use the money for fashion, preserving yourself and maybe for cosmetic cirjury and you make good decisions about it everytime and you get good jobs I guess money could help you with that.


throwaway_alt_slo

>Hence why men nowadays need to actually put in some effort. Effort doesn't make a man attractive


TheIncredibleHarry

Speak for ur self and MANY others lol


Gold_Supermarket1956

I'm speaking in general, people don't date to find someone to build with they date for materialistic shit


hongsta2285

Lol women have higher expectations of their partners than men Is she fit feminine friendly good enough for me moving on meanwhile woman's list is like ..... not even in the same fucking universe Galaxy bro


Gravel_Roads

The list a lot of men on this sub have for women is equally impossible. Shit I've seen dudes on this sub criticize women for: Having a previous boyfriend. (And if he treated her well? BAD! She'll love him more than you! And if he DIDN'T treat her well? BAD! She's damaged goods, fuck her but don't date her!" Getting comforted in the hospital. Wearing make-up. Being too confident. Being too insecure. Not giving enough men a chance. Giving too many men chances. Dressing sloppy. Dressing up too much. Talking too much about what they want. Not talkng enough about what they want. Breaking up with a partner. NOT breaking up with a partner...


jay10033

>Getting comforted in the hospital. I know the post you're referring to, the post was hilarious by the way. A woman wasn't criticized for getting comforted in the hospital. The post wasn't even about criticizing women or dating. This is why folks like you have no credibility. You take a random post out of context to serve your own ends.


NothingOrAllLife

She was literally being criticized for being comforted in the hospital because OP took it as her getting too much attention.


jay10033

No, she wasn't being criticized for that. You really need to know what words mean. The post was about how you should treat women and what they are looking for. Agree with it or not, this was an observation that she loved being the center of attention because it made her feel like a "low-key celebrity". The conclusion was, if you want to get women, make her feel like she's the center of attention. Where exactly is the criticism?


NothingOrAllLife

Did you read that post?? She was being criticized because the OP felt like she was getting all the attention over her boyfriend who was in a coma. All of the stuff about feeling like a celebrity wasn’t a comment from the woman, but from a man that was observing and criticizing the woman.


Plazmatron44

This is in no way a realistic depiction of the average man here let alone men in real life, yes if you cherry pick from enough sources you can build an image of a contradictory and impossible to please man.


Steve-of-Ramadan

You guys do this shit all day with women but the moment generalizations about men come out you all piss your pants and cry


Ok_Landscape_592

Can you honestly say men in this sub here would turn a woman down for literally anything on that list if everything else was fine? Except maybe "dressing sloppy"


GrandpaDallas

Some men for sure would


Barneysparky

For sex or a loving ltr?


Ok_Landscape_592

Either. I don't think men here on men in general are in a position to be that picky to begin with as shown through their actions. I don't think any man here is ACTUALLY or potentially turning down any woman for any of these reasons.


Gravel_Roads

These are ALL things that me on this sub have claimed to reject a woman for, or "not consider her dating material" for.


Ppdebatesomental

No sex on first date N count too high Ironically sometimes from the exact same guy. Like they expect fully formed adults to spring up out of captivity in their 20’s with massive sex drives, a liberal social sexual orientation and zero experience.


starwatcher16253647

>Men compete for status with each other with how we compare with each other in our romantic and sexual exploits with women. It's why so many men have a Madonna/Whore complex. We want women to be hard to get Madonnas for other men but easy whores for us. That way we get status in the eyes of other men for how much pull we have with hard to get women. Redpill and conservative guys seem to be alot more obsessed with projecting masculinity so it's no surprise they have bigger Madonna/Whore complexes relative to progressive types but almost all men subscribe to the above to some extant.


shadowrangerfs

Not just status from other men. But from women as well. Lots of women say they won't date a guy who doesn't already get women. I've heard lots of women say they wouldn't date a guy who has never had a girlfriend or was a virgin.


Illustrious_Wish_383

I think there are two flavors of men in this camp. 1 wants a virgin who becomes a sex crazed nymphomaniac sex athlete the instant she enters marriage/LTR with the man in question. 2 doesn't want a former wild woman who now wants to settle down and act like an uptight prude the instant she enters marriage/LTR with the man in question


Ppdebatesomental

The second is perfectly reasonable imho. The first is just wishing bitcoin can also fly out her ass.


Illustrious_Wish_383

Then we are in agreement.


Ppdebatesomental

Absolutely. The most insane and unreasonable thing women can do is expect monogamy and routinely withhold sex.


BeReasonable90

Dude, there are millions of posts here, cherry picking a few random posts (assuming you are lying), means Jack shit. Which is why you are listing two opposing opinions said by two completely different men and framing it like they were said by the same man. All this really shows is you see men on this sub as one single entity instead of different people. All the data we have points to men having realistic expectations.


GrandpaDallas

What data are you referring to?


TheAvocadoSlayer

What’s the purpose of restating this fact? Like yes, women have higher expectations. What’s your point? Is it supposed to be some gotcha? An opportunity to appear superior? What’s the point?


Gmed66

Not really. Expectations on paper = / = real life choices. Just being hot and cool is enough for a guy to succeed with many hot women.


Stergeary

Except that's not really a fantasy, there are clearly dudes that get with women they have nothing in common with. Those are the ones that make women think "are we all dating the same guy". But in reverse, very few attractive masculine men are dating fat unfeminine women.


[deleted]

i'm a 6'2 attractive guy with an good jawline i will only date and be serious to attractive women, i'm not taking ugly girls serious cause they start switching up and acting like they are the shit


OffTheRedSand

i mean at the end it's their life. if a woman is waiting for the perfect man she's gonna wait a while and if she can't find him she'll stay single, and she knows this. the problem is you think a woman lowering her standards and finding a guy is more important to her than being happy, it's not. if she doesn't like the average guys and content in being single she's not gonna settle, she'll just stay single. for men being in a relationship with an average woman is better than being single. that's not the same for women. idk if women know consciously that they're seeking a fantasy, however im pretty sure they'd rather stay single than date a guy they aren't really into.


PiastriPs3

Women being single isn't really single most of the time. Most of the single girls under 30 I know have fwb, dates and situationships. A minority will be voluntarily celibate for long periods of times. Because women don't have as much sexual needs as men or those sexual needs can easily be taken care of, women experience singledom a lot differently than average or below men. Their emotional needs are met by friends. It's honestly a good Trump card. Men would need to make escorts normalised and cheap to have the same Trump card, and even it won't be the same since you're paying for sex which is always going to be pathetic abd exploitative.


Ok_Landscape_592

LOL women alwyas say they're ok with being single Where are the single women? They always got some thing going on, situationship, whatever arrangement


Comfortable-Wish-192

Yes woman are now free to act like men.


ilikeitjusttheway

Only the top 10% of men.


BeReasonable90

It is because women are entitled to sex and relationships. So women use that as a manipulation tactic.


Objective_Ad_6265

No, it's not that we don't need it. Noone touched me for years, when I say single I mean truly ALONE. But it's still lesser evil than to lay down for duty sex with a man I'm just not attracted to.


DoubleFistBishh

>they shouldn't reflect upon their dating choices and not go for men who are 8 out of 10 because that's dating down. Or they don't see these men as 8 out of 10 or they do and still don't want them. As long as they're happy with their dating life why does it matter? Just be honest and say you want women to date men they don't want and stop acting like you're concerned about their dating success outside of where it benefits you.


KGmagic52

I think the issue is that with access to a global dating marketplace and social media, women's opinions of themselves is inflated and they THINK they're better than their actual matches. Women see men that are 7-8 as 5s. And we know all women are 10s when you ask them. Average men don't get the attention that average women get and it has an impact on how this all plays out.


ParadoxicalFrog2

"Women see men that are 7-8 as 5s" I remember the West Elm Calib thing. They claimed it proved that average guys can easily date lots of women, because the fit, somewhat handsome, 6'3, artsy guy, with a six-figure job, was a "4/10".


DoubleFistBishh

Deciding you don't want to date someone doesn't mean you think you're better than them. Women have more dating options so of course they're going to be more picky. Womens access to more dating options is an issue to men they don't want. The rest of what you're saying is just bitter ranting lol.


KGmagic52

Ok, if women have more dating options, allowing them to be more picky, please explain how that doesn't inflate their egos? How could it not?


DoubleFistBishh

I mean it probably does for some. I think mostly women don't think too deeply about it though. They simply don't date them


TheAvocadoSlayer

If you had an endless amount of suitors your ego would be inflated.


boomcheese44

Even if their egos are inflated, so what? They still will continue to date who they choose to date. But in reality, most women just go for what they want. It dosent mean they think they are better than the guys they dont want. I see that idea a lot here, and its not true. Women want attractive partners with good personalities. Its not our fault most men are unattractive to us.


MarjieJ98354

Hell, I got a 73 yo still chasing after 73 yo Chads, Lol!! So much for old women being old and lonely with cats. And what about the old women looking for peen half their aged in developing country; even though they lose their whole life savings chasing it. Chasing Chad never seems to get old for some women!! And there will always be a Chad that will oblige; even with fat women. A women doesn't even need to lose weight to meet any average man's useless standards!!


volleyballbeach

There of plenty of women not thinking or pretending to think they are 10s


claratheresa

Dating apps are 70% men. Perhaps this is not the right way to meet women.


Razieloo

It's already responsible for more than 50% of couple meetings nowadays. It doesn't mean it's good or anything, but apparently it works for someone. Year after year the percentage grows.


No-Mess-8630

Funny of you to assume that women outside of Online Dating would be more reasonable or even think differently


Expensive-Tea455

Some women won’t be interested in you and that’s their right 🤷🏽‍♀️


No-Mess-8630

True 💀


DrunkOnRamen

offline dating events disprove that


Ok_Landscape_592

I would assume women on OLD are weirder or worse b/c if you're a woman you shouldn't have to turn to OLD so if they do it says something about them Even moreso women who are on OLD long-term and still have yet to find someone


Expensive-Tea455

I say the same about men, most of the men who have to use dating apps tend to be the leftovers that nobody wants 🤣


Ok_Landscape_592

Sure, OLD is a shitshow, but women have a much higher initial advantage with dating so you'd expect more men on OLD due to lack of success or options IRL. If the woman is on OLD even moreso there's something wrong. Like comparing the woman/femcel who has trouble getting sex or affection versus the male incel. Due to supp/demand a woman will always have significantly more options than her male counterpart. There must be something very wrong with the femcel.


MarjieJ98354

So you expect to find a Unicorn online and at the same time believe all women online are reject. Got it!!


Ok_Landscape_592

I don't expect to find anything online. I don't do OLD.


DrunkOnRamen

>Dating apps are 70% men dating app stats are not publicly given by their respective companies so where are you getting this information?


thetruthishere_

If you went looking you can find stats on many of the apps.


claratheresa

https://datingzest.com/tinder-statistics/


DrunkOnRamen

That is dating zest publishing not tinder.


claratheresa

The article is published by an industry source. The ultimate source of the data is statista. https://www.businessofapps.com/data/tinder-statistics/


Wattehfok

Dude - the girls can date whoever they want. If it's unrealistic, they'll work it out. Just let them be adults and don't concern-troll them for not dating who you want them to date.


DrunkOnRamen

This is a debate subreddit.


Alternative_Poem445

concern-troll is just a funny way to dismiss someones argument. you are suggesting that dissenting opinions are proof of poor character, because somehow you think thats meaningful. you're on a sub dedicated to gender and dating debates, what did you think you were going to find here exactly? a big circlejerk?


Loose_Impact9769

would you rather have women be with men they don't like? i don't understand this.


dugongone

Women are humans. Humans want things they can't have. The average woman can have lots of average men, so she wants more than the average man


firdseven

What women like is based on what other women like.


fiftypoundpuppy

How do those other women start liking what they like?


Loose_Impact9769

you can say that that is also the case for men


IAmTheIron-Manlet

No the fuck its not??? Where did you get this dumbass idea? Men don't give a fuck about what others think when it comes to relationships. Meanwhile women won't allow other women to date someone who may be short, balding, ugly, because they can't imagine themselves dating that person.


AnonishCath

Men *love* to have arm candy and make other men jealous. They use women to increase their status among other men. Having a hot gf/wife is absolutely a status symbol


Loose_Impact9769

it really is not that serious, chill out


Commercial_Tea_8185

Its more so the case for men imo


howdoiw0rkthisthing

Can you link to the university of Queensland study and name the former match maker?


Wattehfok

It's some stuff he read that he half remembers. That should be good enough for you. Don't be mean and make him do some cursory googling.


hongsta2285

The best thing I love about this implosion is the amount of useless trash dating coaches... That's hilarious to me. Please take advice from me about dating and marriage when I'm a divorced loser that's a receptical lol 😆 😂 watching those videos cracks me up! The blind clowns leading more stupid blind clowns to fail at life. It's hilarious! Remember fellas never ask a fish how to fish ask a fisherman. Never ask a trash loser dating coach that failed at life.. learn from people that actually have successful stable marriages not trash loser scam scum that want u to buy their dating courses. So u can manifest and level up to get your fantasy partner LOL joke


Large-Signal-157

What do you want women to do? Bang and marry men they don’t like like that? Seriously? What’s wrong with you?


Gmed66

There's not really anything to do necessarily. This is just observational. If we go back even 15 years, a guy who was in good shape and looked alright/average range, not too short, had a good career and so on, could definitely find someone on his own level. Now? He might, but it's way harder and many of these guys get left out. It's no longer holistic.


pop442

Well, Finland is reaching record low birth rates while opening itself up to mass immigration. Somehow, many Finnish women can find tons of things wrong with average Finnish men to avoid wanting to date and marry them but the Islamic world is pretty much gearing itself up to dominate the globe by the end of the century for better or worse. Just some food for thought. Salam. [73% of U-35 women in Finland are childless (dailyfinland.fi)](https://www.dailyfinland.fi/health/35840/73-of-U-35-women-in-Finland-are-childless#) [Why Islam Is the Fastest Growing Religion in the World? (bestdiplomats.org)](https://bestdiplomats.org/why-islam-is-the-fastest-growing-religion/#:~:text=With%20the%20continued%20substantial%20contributions,the%20quickest%20pace%20of%20growth.)


Able_Donut2654

Rising expectations and entitlement doesn't actually make people happier. The rates of depression, termination and quiet desperation should be some indication.


holyskillet

every one of us is responsible for our own mental states. If some woman shoots for Chad and fails - this is her choice and her responsibility. If some random loser gets depressed because of that - it's also his choice and his brainchild.


IronDBZ

>every one of us is responsible for our own mental states. No we're not. We all effect each other and the only way a half-way sustainable society can survive is by people understanding and taking that fact to heart.


KentuckyCriedFlickin

You can't say that on Reddit, it makes too much sense. We must live in a world of individualism and seclusion, otherwise you escape the matrix.


holyskillet

then we can put you in a matriarchy where I can take full responsibility for your moods, since you are unable to do it for yourself


ilikeitjusttheway

Sounds good.


DrunkOnRamen

The issue is this, that same woman will go and tell men that the bar is in hell, minimal effort, etc.


holyskillet

The bar is not in hell, it's exactly where it should be. Some individual women are aiming too high, but overall, as a class, women are doing exactly what they are designed to do.


Able_Donut2654

The woman shooting and failing is the one that ends up depressed and bitter. Sure it's her responsibility but when you put millions together you get society as a whole and when the dominant social ideas lead to too many people shooting for things that are mathematically impossible for more than a small minority to get and ending up bitter and depressed, some reflection needs to be made about those dominant social narratives that are leading to such negative results.


holyskillet

no offense, but moral lectures about grand societal trends from some random dude are a whatever sandwich. Man, whatever.


Able_Donut2654

Nobody is forcing you to participate in a debate sub you know.


holyskillet

No, I'm saying, this is my argument: all of that looks like obsession with other people's lives and lack of some meaningful project in yours tbh, hence the moral lecture on the downfall of society. For example, I don't care about bitter women, and I especially don't care about depressed men. I don't have an opinion on these people. It's pretty weird that you have an opinion on them :/


Able_Donut2654

It's pretty weird you are here if you don't have any opinions. Particularly when you are necroing a 3 day old thread to tell me you don't have an opinion on it. You also might want to look up the meaning of "obsession" in the dictionary since a couple of throwaway comments on a sub dedicated to wasting time while you are on the toilet is not what you are going to find. You seem to be reaching so hard, for what or why I have no idea. Why don't you tell me?


[deleted]

[удалено]


Able_Donut2654

You ok?


PurplePillDebate-ModTeam

Be civil. This includes indirect attacks against an individual and/or witch hunting.


Fair-Bus-4017

Ahhhh yes because this is the main reason for it. Lets ignore all the other factors like current living/working conditions, dept, understanding of depression, decrease in stigma surrounding it, etc.


Able_Donut2654

That excuse always gets dragged out despite making no sense if you think about it more than 3 seconds. If that were the case then diagnosis numbers would be up but negative consequences would be way down. The opposite is happening, people ending themselves is up, other negative consequences are also way up. So no.


Fair-Bus-4017

Dude if you put any thought into it then you can figure out that we are living in an era which is way more complex than the ones before it. It is not as simple as men don't get pussy so they rope themselves.


Able_Donut2654

I'm not talking about men


Large-Signal-157

Ok. I don’t know those rates. You probably shouldn’t either.


Able_Donut2654

They get posted here often enough.


Commercial_Tea_8185

That doesnt answer her question


Able_Donut2654

The answer is to do some serious self reflection and disconnect from the modern toxic hyper consumerist competitive image driven zeitgeist. After that you will find that you don't actually care about the things that social media and advertising campaigns put in your head. It will be a lot easier to make genuine human connections with normal people.


DrunkOnRamen

they could just be honest about their standards and how unrealistic they are and not cry about how "there are no good men" when they rejecting them left right and center.


Wise-Comedian-4316

Imagine if the hours spent crying about standards was spent on something productive. You aren't gonna change anything. The average women isn't asking where all the good men are nor is she holding out for a 9/10.


IAmTheIron-Manlet

You're right, she's not. She's sharing that 9/10 with 10 other women expecting him to eventually commit.


Large-Signal-157

Who is crying about no good men? No TikToks or reels.


DrunkOnRamen

i have had plenty of friends of friends that asked me this.


Savings-Bee-4993

I can name a few in my life. Are you saying you haven’t heard any women in yours say this?


Large-Signal-157

No. I haven’t.


IcyTrapezium

I hear women complain about a select few pretty terrible dates but irl I have never heard a woman even suggest “there are no good men.” I’ve had terrible dates, but go on enough you find some great guys. It’s just a numbers game. Lots of great guys out there.


IAmTheIron-Manlet

>Lots of great guys out there. "But they're not tall enough 😕" - average woman


IcyTrapezium

Well long legs look amazing for me to consume as a visual cue as a woman, and it makes me feral because yes we ARE visual, but I’ve never looked at a short gorgeous man and thought “I wish his legs were longer.” When a short king is a short king…. Well….


IAmTheIron-Manlet

>When a short king is a short king…. Well…. I honestly don't know what you mean by this


IcyTrapezium

I mean short kings are hot and I never have wanted them to be taller.


Different_Cress7369

They were saying the same thing as 15yo. It’s a them problem.


MarjieJ98354

I think women were saying this more 30 years ago before there was hookup culture was the norm. Now it seems women have given up on finding good men and really only hope for good penis these days.


Soldazzzz

Its literally a meme. "Where have all the good men gone?"


holyskillet

considering that most women are coupled, the standards are not unrealistic. It's just unrealistic for you to meet them


Dutchmaster617

The guy in my complex who punched his girl Saturday morning and when a neighbor saw he sped off in his pickup truck. I certainly don’t meet this standard of punching women early on my days off. But I’m not complaining either just making dialogue.


No-Mess-8630

Settling exist ?


holyskillet

I mean, the fact that women will settle just proves my point


howdoiw0rkthisthing

Is that really all you want?


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PiastriPs3

Women can be as selective as they can on dating apps and irl and further make dating increasingly a winners take all affair among men, whom the winners will be more likely to have multiple families, wives and mistresses over their lifetime whilst single men and forever bachelour increases as has happened in Korea. But I don't think women should expect men to care when they start complaining that the men they choose are likelier to never commit, cheat or entertain non monogamous arrangements. It's just one side of the hypergamy coin. Women and men have near irreconcilable mating strategies. As the competition increases and men are culled from the gene pool, I don't think women will ever change for the sake of men because humans are selfish and self interested and you cant change sexuality on the individual level, but I do think it will turn more men bitter and less willing to compromise when they do make the cut. Blue pills even today are more purple than a few years ago. As the politically and culturally powerful blue pilled boomers who lived in a different and more equal time in terms of the SMP will be replaced by forever bachelours, and redpilled and purple pilled married dudes, the culture war will only get worse I think. I mean do young gen Z men even care about abortion or women's issues these days like millenials or gen Xers? There's definitely a chill among my younger cousins when it comes to women. Romanticism is dead for average looking young dudes and they care less for women compared to previous generations, as they're hyperfocused on how to survive and thrive in a late capitalist and brutal sexual heirarchy tgat women had a hand in creating and propagating


IAmTheIron-Manlet

Great write up my friend 👍


bluestjuice

Maybe? I really think that women who are extremely selective about partners may be heavily filtering their app results but are then also having first dates with a number of these prospects. I would guess they are ultimately rejecting those men based on things they observed from in-person interaction.


Gold_Supermarket1956

Bruh imma be honest 90% of women aren't on dating apps, alot prefer to meet men in RL through various hobbies or activities...


DrunkOnRamen

in Chicago most of the hobby groups even baking is mainly men, the women that are there are with their signifcant others.


IAmTheIron-Manlet

Yeah the whole "just hobbygroupmaxx, bro!" shit is hilarious to me, its just men in those groups. It's a fucking sausage fest because women know they will be drowning in average men they're not attracted to


Gold_Supermarket1956

The public groups yes, quite a few intersex hiking and camping groups that do a lot of back country trips but someone's gotta vouch for you mainly because they don't want a liability and for two as a background check


dugongone

No, they have a point. I have no idea where single women are. I travel the world as a lifestyle. I join any local activity. It's all single men, and men with their girlfriends. Single women in social activities are VERY rare no matter the country


obviousredflag

SOME women and SOME men want a fantasy and are delusional and will not stop chasing what they think they "deserve". The overwhelming majority of men and women do accept reality and don't chase the fantasy, but are fine with the people they can get. Look at relationship data. What some fringe media shills put out is not "what US women want" and definitely not what US women do. What happened to "look at what they do and not at what they say"?


KingMurphy15

Bro all I want is a man with hygiene, loves me, and won’t cheat or fantasize about other women. But that seems to be impossible. So sure, ig I want a fantasy. Sad that having a man with those few standards is a fantasy though. And tbf, men have their own fantasies as well? They all want the hottest “best” woman with the perfect body or whatever. Or the submissive wife who won’t ever argue or call out bs. Then there’s men who want to be able to fuck whoever while being married. But also expect their wife not to?? They want all the threesomes and everything, even if their partner doesn’t want it. Both genders have a problem with unrealistic and shitty fantasies


Upset_Material_3372

The type of man you claim to want is extremely common and very easy to find. Most men’s fantasy is to simply feel desired but for most that’s now unrealistic.


Perfect-Resist5478

Most men’s fantasy is to simply be desired- By a hot, not obese or overweight woman who will fuck him on demand, who makes money (but not too much), who is submissive and agreeable, who will be ok with him gaming for hours per day, who doesn’t care about his porn habits…


KingMurphy15

Bro, literally looking at any social media, men irl (friends, strangers, my brothers and their friends) and almost any comment section with men says otherwise. Either they watch porn, talk about how they want to fuck other women that aren’t their SO/see them naked yada yada, cheat, sexualize all the women they see, or barely put effort into appearance and hygiene while women spend hours getting glammed up and looking/smelling nice. And if we don’t put in enough work to be pretty or whatever were considered lazy or ugly. It is apparent that it’s not very common to find a man who will just be satisfied with their loving SO or put in basic work for something as simple as hygiene. Men like to say women suck in all these different ways or are super shallow, but the truth is men are just as bad if not worse. The reason so many guys are complaining now is because women have the freedom now to be just as shitty as men (shallow, cheaters, etc.) have the right to say no, be happy single, and can live their own lives


Upset_Material_3372

The men women want do these things but that’s only a small portion of men. If a woman did nothing at all to appeal to men she’d still have her pick of average men. The reason guys are complaining now is that women as a whole only entertain the thought of above average desirable men, as shown when women complain about men not showing bare minimum effort, because those desirable men don’t need to put in effort for average women they already all want them.


Fichek

>Bro all I want is a man with hygiene, loves me, and won’t cheat or fantasize about other women. Only that? Really? You aren't conveniently forgetting to mention a few things, are you? :D


AlternativeNote594

>Bro all I want is a man with hygiene, loves me, and won’t cheat or fantasize about other women.  Most men can and do fit that bill. If all you're finding are unwashed guys who cheat on you, maybe how you select men needs looking at.


holyskillet

The issue is that we don't know who we are talking to and where she lives and who is around her. there are plenty of men like what she described, so many of them. but need to put yourself in a right location: competitive university, good job, nice gym, nice area with whole foods, etc. If this girl works a $10/hr job in fast food, yeah, she can't expect this type of person to be near her enough for chemistry to happen. But that's the blue-pilled advice, in the red pilled world hygenic men with their shit together hit up random bimbos all the time.


DrunkOnRamen

The issue is with how they pick men. What OP described in this post makes sense.


holyskillet

Nope, women are built for sexual selection. If nobody picks you, it's because you suck even more than the men they pick. There is no other way around this


DrunkOnRamen

I had received likes from two women on Hinge, both were substantially overweight even on the obese side, neither women put any effort in their profiles, appearance, one had a photo of their gut sticking out from under their shirt. quickly they began to complain about dating prospects and having to "settle" for someone like me. I am not obese, fat, I am in a healthy weight according to my physical, I work out and I put in a great deal in my appearance. How exactly am I worse? Why wouldn't it make sense to say these women's standards were absurd?


holyskillet

These women's standards are absurd, but that's why dating apps super suck: if you are making a profile on hinge you are competing with a lot of dudes for a very small pool of women


DrunkOnRamen

but here's the thing, this experience is effectively the same offline too, so how do you explain that?


holyskillet

how many fat 4s do you actually see dating Greek gods dude


DrunkOnRamen

what are you talking about? I simply said women's standards don't change offline or online and you respond with some non-sequitur, I don't get it.


PiastriPs3

Speak for yourself. I just want a dominant or non sub woman who can make me laugh and protect me when I'm feeling like shit and be in a cooperative egalitarian relationship. Most men have far more variable sexual and relationship preferences than the average woman who seem to all go for the same old heteronormative masculine men. Ultra submissive women are a turn off for me as in my experience, they tend to expect more of the bullshit gender roles and masculine expectations than the average woman.


SlavePrincessVibes3

This DESPERATE and blatant need to convince women to lower their standards is TELLING


_jay_fox_

It's not just US it's global. Have you noticed that men have become zombified, cut off from real support networks (corporate bureaucracy is not a support network), cut off from knowledge, wisdom. Basically men are being societally neglected and blamed for it ***and it's disgusting and needs to change***. I am driving change by creating an informal Discord group of single bros, 100% online, we will form community support eachother, share knowledge and wisdom, laugh and cry together for emotional healing. We single men need to come together because this system doesn't care about us.


MyUpSeemsDown

Yea, some people can afford options that others don't have. Fact of life, truth we all face sometimes, it won't change though it's ok because that's life


SaBahRub

So is spinning plates and accumulating harems


Fichek

Is it really a good counter-argument to compare all women to a fringe tiny minority of men and their fringe weird behavior as a way to say "Look, you are doing the same thing!!!!!"?


SaBahRub

Red pill is fringe? I thought men are waking up and there’s going to be a beta uprising or relationship boycott or passport bro-ing, or…..something?


Fichek

I'm talking about plate spinning and harems. But feel free to continue being obtuse.


N-Zoth

Shooting for the moon = winner mentality. This wouldn't be a problem for the guys if they rose to the challenge instead of waiting for freebies.


BrainMarshal

Men shooting for the moon is great for the environment. The human population will drop to half a billion lol


hongsta2285

The hardest thing they can't accept is that they are average dead plain average at best. They can't process and accept the fact that someone above average wants them for fun and discard them Where as men know where they stand .. dated a few out of my league I was the rebound guy had my fun she found comfort and solace in me... she left me eventually but I knew I was dead man walking. She was never mine it was just my turn. Knew it from day one as the rebound guy... Lol read the room which woman in this sub tells themselves and the world they are pretty plain average. Every special snowflake thinks they are the best thing since sliced bread. Everyone always says they are pretty decent above average blah blah fuck off take a long hard look lol most don't even hit a 5 sexual market value wise....minus fake up filters and all that other trash most people are painfully average. Just men can admit it women can't... but hey doesn't matter wtf u think at the end of the day the cuz I don't care I don't care what u think either all I care is the wall and how it's undefeated u can't run or beat father time. And father time is always always always right just a matter of time amen . Let those who make poor life choices suffer for their decisions amen


shonenhikada

[https://youtu.be/NM\_kvqbXg8Y?si=YsWizWizkfUrd6dN&t=115](https://youtu.be/NM_kvqbXg8Y?si=YsWizWizkfUrd6dN&t=115)


MidnightOpposite4892

I agree. Even an average woman (5-6/10) is told that she deserves the mega Chad 10/10 so they wait and reject every other men, based on their illusion that they deserve only the best. But society probably thinks that men don't deserve the best (how dare a 5/10 man thinks he deserves the best? No fucking way!)


holyskillet

social constructs go BRR


StrugglingSoprano

Funny because I see far more women “date down” in terms of attractiveness than men


[deleted]

[удалено]


wtknight

Replies to Debate posts must challenge the OP's view.


SoldierExcelsior

Give them the fantasy.


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AnalSexIsTheBest8--

Ok? I fail to see the problem. Those women will remain forever alone if they continue chasing fantasy. So?


Glass-Violinist-8352

Western women not only the american ones


DerpaDerpaDooDinkle

Anyone who's so fixated on good looks isn't someone you want to be dating anyway. Hot people are generally just as self-absorbed, so they kind of deserve each other.


NockerJoe

>Or as one former female matchmaker said when she quit the industry, women continue to try and make the most attractive men the personalities of the men who aren't attractive. You don't need an experts opinion. Just look at a lot of the dating takes from women here. A large portion of the female userbase seems to have the opinion that men should fall in line and conform to female desires, often with no reciprocity, because of the kind of scarcity low value men get. That they want, at least in theory, high value men who play by a totally different ruleset never occurs to them. Nor that both the value of a person and the value system they judge on aren't fixed.


No_Matter_8648

Goodluck explaining this around here. I am giving up & just gonna lurk for the odd cute chick who has stumbled onto reddit & is clearly lost lol. Everytime a guy writes a reasonable truth like this the wokest mfers come out of the woodwork to shamelessly gaslight & deny. As men we know bro we are all in agreement. The women here just enjoy trolling cuz it’s the closest they have to a relationship with a man. Reason being the women here are the ones no one actually swipes on.


Westernation

I think the biggest mistake men make is assuming that every woman they talk to is the last one on earth. I’ve been circling one for weeks - and this past weekend, I could see she wanted to distance me because there was another trying to make herself my gf. So, I left her on read and spent this evening talking to two others - both of whom were at the same party as me Saturday night. Men just need to put women into play more.


Fair-Bus-4017

Can we stop acting like online dating is a reflection of the entire dating landscape when it only is a small fraction of it. And not only that mainly gets used for hookups. And no what they want isn't a fantasy, because the bottom line is that they can punch way above their pay grade because of supply and demand. There simply is an abundance of guys on these platforms who are mainly there to get pussy. So women get to pick and choose who they want to sleep with or even date. And in the real world things are still the same as they were. Although obviously with women having more rights then they once had they no longer need to settle. So guys need to put in more effort.


Adorable_sor_1143

Can we please?