OP's Bio:
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>6"5' and a whopping 150lbs. I'm a psychiatric nurse who loves hiking, camping, rock climbing, reading, journaling, and gaming - although my PC is way out of date so I'm currently just using the Switch here and there. I also like weed. I make many decisions on a whim when I'm needing a change, hence my tattoos, pierced ears and newly bleached hair. Got a gym membership today but, like the hair, it likely won't last. Roast me!
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If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.
This is the picture of yourself your going to look back at years later and realize how much of a dork you were, just a stick of a dork wishing he was the real slim shady.
OP's Bio: --- >6"5' and a whopping 150lbs. I'm a psychiatric nurse who loves hiking, camping, rock climbing, reading, journaling, and gaming - although my PC is way out of date so I'm currently just using the Switch here and there. I also like weed. I make many decisions on a whim when I'm needing a change, hence my tattoos, pierced ears and newly bleached hair. Got a gym membership today but, like the hair, it likely won't last. Roast me! --- If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.
Feminem
I think he starred in “Ate Mile(s of Dick)”
Bet wrote it too
Sat on it for a while, butt finally finished it.
Wrote the song "Coming out my Closet"
Haha! Good one.
He's the real Slim Gaydy
“his arms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy, dick in his butt already, looser than mom’s spaghetti”…. he’s nervous
But on the surface, he’s got cum already…
[удалено]
How to bend down, his asshole's gaping now
He opens his mouth and the cum all drips out. He’s choking now, so much cum he’s choking now.
The cock slips out, he faints from no oxygen - PLOW
It's queefing from taking 10 men on.
Yo. His ass is wetty, knees sore, glasses like Geddy;. There's jizz on his chin already, he's built like dry spaghetti..
You better go fuck yourself in the ass, the moment. you own it, you never let it go you got multiple shots, do not miss any chance to blow.
This cock fortuity cums once in a lifetime
This is why I love Reddit 😭
Hipster Slender man
I was thinking a greasy ass wand with golden retriever hair and sock lint stuck to it…
AIDS has entered the chat
Haha. He looks like he delivers pizzas… Slim Shakey’s
Yikes man... 😬
When you know you can't beat the first comment......bye!
TAKE MY FUCKING UPVOTE!
WHY DO PEOPLE UPVOTE “TAKE MY UPVOTE?”
r/beatmetoit
I literally came here to say this. Well played fellow redditor :)
Nice my first instinct was Slim Lady
You win
U just made my day brah. xD
LOL nice Steph. Edit: Like instead of Stan
His style is late 70’s… Slim Brady
Nerf Gun Kelly
Squirt Gun Smelly
With a skateboard and an XL t shirt you could get around town on a gentle breeze
I ordered Eminem, but Skittles showed up instead.
Dude shaped like a chess bishop
That's what happens when you let the priest shape your child
Dear god 🤧😂
Remember the first Harry Potter movie? He played all chess pieces
You fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuiuuu
I was thinking if Megamind merged with a bishop.
Oh lord
You could probably throw a football over them mountains
are you training to be a cage fighter?
You can hear the "yesss.....".
You're a psychiatric nurse? You look like a drug induced hallucination. How can your presence possibly help a psych patient?
They help them realize the world is no better than their hallucinations
This the comment right here.
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He’s built like a match stick.
If he was on fire in a Gents toilet and I really needed the piss, I'd use the sink.
They charge for toilets in Europe. I’m not paying for that.
He doesn't get attention because when he stands sideways he disappears
"That boy ain't right"- Hank Hill
Lmao
Mmmkay Mr. Mackie
You look like Logic with a terminal illness
Illogic
Logic minus the bi racial bit
Your face looks like a guitar pick that's been strumming turds.
omg hahahahahaha it doessssss
You got those child bearing hips
😳
You are so skinny, you could slide right between those fence boards behind you.
I looked at your profile [and I'm pretty sure you are 4'5"](https://imgur.com/a/jwsOezV)
Lmao I love the effort you put into this
Slim Shameful
Dude looks like a q-tip
What is if a mouse and q-tip could breed Alex?
Your hairline is as absent as your father figure.
You look like Aids in the 90's
On an endless quest for children.
✏ arm looking self bro
Whole body is a #2
You know this is roast me and not a dating app?
You look like you smell like whiskey depression and hooker spit
Don't forget weed smoke
Will the real queershady please stand up
I'm sure you'll make some nice older man very happy as he throws money at you, you twink.
 You remind me of Bobby from Goof Troop.
This shook me to my core
Feminem is about to drop his balls finally
You look like you belong on a register and get attention by letting the neighbours know
This dudes father was a Giraffe
He's got that super neck
What dat neck do
Bro you need to be on a ceaseless quest for some protein
😭
You look like the cousin who gets asked to step out of family photos
You have Bobby from King of the Hill on your shirt. You look like Bobby after 10 years of Meth addiction.
Welcome to earth
- Will Smiff
Are your hips above your abdomen?
Shirt and angle did me no favors in this pic
🎵your hips are connected to your, arm bones🎵
Isn’t bleach bad for red heads scalps?
You’re 6’5” trying to be slightly edgy and you still can’t get attention? Wonder why.
Your mom: you can be anything you want. You: I want to be a q-tip (becomes skinny and dyes hair)
Looks like Mr Mackey had a baby with Mrs Garrison
You look like you insulted a voodoo priestess.
Worlds biggest Q-Tip
U look like a coat hanger with a head
You know how most chicks want their men over 6 feet tall? You're the exception.
Bobby Hill after being starved by Hank after eating a well done steak cooked without propane.
If Fonzi had a kid with a Santa Monica hooker who was a failed hand model.
Eminem? Nah this is skittle
Sour skittles
So it's Eminem but down tremendous into Detroit?
Is that a 9' privacy fence?
 Look it's Virgil's best friend from static shock lol
Minus the hair
😂😂😂
Remember that movie “Weekend at Bernie’s”? Be like Bernie.
He still would ruin the party
Feminem
" you're 6'5" and are 45 pounds...gumbee has batter body than you...boom roasted"
Giovanni Ribisi researching his next role as a meth dealer..
You look like Eminem when he used to beat his wife.
sorry can't roat what's already roasted.
Your head is so big you look like a white megamind
Your rock climbing beta is just 1 reach. No dyno.
Your quest doesn’t take you past the gym does it?
Believe it or not I'm there right now (for the first time in a long time). These comments are fueling the workout lol
Are we going to have to do this four times a week? Don’t overdo anything bruh, all in good time!
Youre the crackhead Bobby hill. Get away from my purse
What pairs well with chemo?
J Ballsack
McDonald's coffee stirrer built...
Bobby hill grew up.
You look like a Stretch Armstrong version of Eminem
Crustin Dweeber
The blonde hair just makes your head look bigger my dude. Big Squidward energy
Your momma was so ashamed she threw you out the spaceship.
I thought Justin Bieber stopped doing drugs.
Can’t decide if you’re more an Eminem or MGK dick rider
Both sides of the battle
Couldn't get laid in a prison with a handful of paroles did give away.
Eminem’s lawyers called. They are issuing a cease and desist on an unauthorised impersonation.
You look like you jerk off to puberty videos
If Walter White and Jesse Pinkman had a kid
JFC! you are one ugly alien
What happen when a human mates with a praying mantis
Everyone has a skeleton in the closet, This guy is a skeleton in the closet.
I know by a fact that he got molested by his cousin
It took me far too long to realise which fence panel we were supposed to be roasting
What a 'waist' of a life.....
6'5" 95 lbs
How does it feel going through life cosplaying as a used Q-tip?
6'5", 65lbs
More like a ceaseless discharge
You are a Spanish exclamation point.
Phone home!
Slim Maybe, please sit down, please down
MOM, I got a "maybe"!
Lil creep stealer of teenage girls tshirts
That'd be one big teenage girl 😳
You look like off brand mega mind and a 32 year old discord mod living in his moms basement had a baby.
Why do I know you’ve wiped cum off that mustache before
Your face really said screw Egyptians and became an upside down pyramid
You look like DJ Qualls and Eminem had a kid.
[удалено]
Phineas and Ferb and That
6’5 and can still tell you were a crack baby
Head like a Guess Who character
Nailed it. 
I swear I've seen your song Pop Deity somewhere before.
Built like a q-tip.
Tyler durden light. Handicaped fight club.
You're more than likely bleached your asshole too
Bro ngl the first thing i said when i seen u was "wtf is that"
That do be me
Frankie Muniz but tall
Justin Bieber after a round of chemo
Timothy McGay
Dear Slim: I wrote you but you still ani’t callin…
You aren’t getting any slam dunks there, Dork Nowitzki
You look like the human version a Kinder Suprise egg
This is the picture of yourself your going to look back at years later and realize how much of a dork you were, just a stick of a dork wishing he was the real slim shady.
I'm 90% sure I'll still be a dork then too
You look like the 5th least annoying Molly dealer at a warehouse rave.
You remind me of a dirty Q-tip.
If the wind catches that shirt just right, it is going to launch your scrawny ass to the stratosphere.
Discount Slim Jesus
Man’s built like a Q-Tip.
6ft 3inch of you is neck