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Atypical_Wave

"So there I was walking with max, right dude, we were just walking down the street, then this guy approaches me, approaches me can you believe it, he says... he says... listen to me Jay are you listening? He says you wanna buy a kilo of coke. I look him straight in the eye and I tell him... this is what I told him Jay, Jay over here, I said 'you have some nerve to approach me with my young gay son on the street, I don't want him to see his dad sick this guys cock right now Jay, I'm telling you scary dude, so I just told max to run and I blew the guy in the alley, I let him keep the coke I didn't want it. Told max i had to fight him." - Robert "Bobby" Kelly, probably


Boberto1357

Probably Bobably


Efficient_Durian3089

You’re the Shakespeare of Reddit I tip my hat to you sir


Atypical_Wave

Ai Bobby stole my Job.


Evil_Den666

My gay son 🤣


Atypical_Wave

Dad I thought you left for cigarettes 26 years ago 🤣


SODTAOEMAN

Joe List called him out on an episode of the Regz that was funny. I no longer listen to the Bonfire and only hear him on the Regz and it's so obvious everybody knows half his stories are fake and have to awkwardly make believe.


Efficient_Durian3089

I heard Joe call him out a few times. Joe is a real one


Thatonefloorguy

I’ve been saying this for a long time. I stopped listening to YKWD so long ago because of this. Then I stopped listening to bonfire because of the way he’s full of shi*. I’m not stoked to hear his nonsense on the regz but I will manage for a while.


Fatkokz

The regz is great. Not a Bobby fan but he's good on it. You can tell the guys legit like each other and definitely don't let each other get away with retarded shit like saying you got offered a kilo with your 12 year old.


Thatonefloorguy

Your right. The real friendship between these guys is genuine. That’s what make the regz so fun.


mystictick

I think most of the comics take him with a grain of salt. His idea of riffing is making up bullshit on the spot. The problem is there isn't a punchline, it doesn't go anywhere. And to top it all off, Max has pubes!


electricvelvet

Why tf do I even know his sons name? I don't even know my coworkers kids names


AllIGOTWUZTHISSHIRT

I have a friend who does this and it's the cringiest thing people do. You'd think after that happening once you'd never make up a story again but some people have no shame.


hnirobert

Joe, Dan and Luis all shitting on him over that valet/bird story a month or two back was incredible.


One_Hour_Poop

It's the best thing about the The Regz. They all call out Bobby on his bullshit. Dan and Luis combined are merciless.


rkdoriv1

So, are you trying to tell me that the story about him doing a show at a college. The next day a girl showed up at his door and said you’re coming to my room. And when they got there she said you’re going to take me. You’re trying to tell me that that wasn’t true.


jsmitt716

Well half these incels describe Bobby back in the day as "beautiful", and most of em only ever fucked one or 2 women before getting a little famous. So they listen to Bobby's getting laid stories and think 'it must be true because he was so hot back in the day"


Skank_wrangler

They did say she was a big girl right?


AaronTuplin

One of them San Antonio girls?


[deleted]

Victoria's a secret down there


lnp66

Bobby is the ultra light bart kreinser


Evergreen27108

Ultra light might be the wrong phrasing here.


k3tam1nec0wb0y

Genuine Draft?


ace_dangerfield187

i doubt there are many people asking random strangers if they wanna 20K+ blow on the streets


AaronTuplin

It was liter of cola, bobby. Not kilo of Coke


StevieSparta

A kilo 😂😂


cheese584

ya usually how it works people walk up to you and offer you a kilo of cocaine


mikelor84

I starting to think Doug Bell was inspired by bobby


AcanthaceaeTop991

A kilo is a thousand grams easy to remember


chinesedebt

🎶🎵 youll never catch the kid going hand to hand 🎶🎵


AcanthaceaeTop991

Red tops


ZaggahZiggler

That's 2.2 Pounds in Murrican


Careful_Coach_8367

I don’t even think his kid exists because every word out of his mouth is a lie, it’s brutal


bigsxvhuj533

He must have really been tempted. It’s only been 38 years since he quit drugs.


RicHigh29

https://www.reddit.com/r/Money/s/vCRtNmwmFT


Ready-Wrongdoer7706

Bobby also claims to not know what the mattress room was for even though other stories have him fucking and doing coke at the same age.


Zer0-Grey

I am guessing this isn't in the US where this took place? Haven't listened yet. Central America they will do this usually they size you up they try to sell something else, and slip in they have it. They will give you a confusing number 1000 grams sounds about right then they give you an 8 ball because most tourists are stupid and don't know what 1000 grams looks like. If you call them out for the amount, it becomes a language barrier thing. More than likely they just are selling you powdered milk.


Efficient_Durian3089

It happened in Miami


Zer0-Grey

That actually doesn't drop the probability of this happening that much. As it is all a hustle either way, tourists who are there to party are easily scammed. Bobby just looked like a mark. If he bought it he'd probably overdose on fentanyl.


kshorton9665

I mean it's Miami, so technically the US, but not really.


Zer0-Grey

Yeah there is probably alot of the same scams going on there. Especially the 1000 grams thing makes me suspect that. If someone with a thick accent or throwing out other languages there was like 1000 grams and they give you less you can switch it up like no I milligrams, or the sorry my bad I ment 100 grams. If the tourist pays full price that's alot of profit, or they are reluctant you can bring down the price drastically. Bobby probably stood out as a tourist and easy mark.


xxmikekxx

I thought he said the guy said “would you like a key” which I took as a “key bump”


Efficient_Durian3089

Drug dealers don’t sell bumps bro


xxmikekxx

I guess I’m used to being at concerts and just thought it was a friendly man that wanted to share


RIP_Leftee

He sucks dude, how many examples do you need lol


Fooky_mcdooky

I mean if you wanna be a queef about it I guess you’re right


Efficient_Durian3089

Hi Dawn


Fooky_mcdooky

Hack


Efficient_Durian3089

Sorry you’re a queef is that better


Fooky_mcdooky

Yup thanks


No-Fox-1291

I feel bad for max. His dad is such a queef. I’m an Irish mick and this retard makes the gayest opinions. Can he quit to do drag show so we can get a real comedian


[deleted]

[удалено]


Efficient_Durian3089

He says a whole key I don’t have that much money referring to a Kilo and nobody buys a key bump


MisterxRager

No one describes a bump like that..


The_Royale_We

LOL read all the way to the bottom to find the only accurate post in the thread.