T O P

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Brian_Kinney

I tried fucking. I tried being fucked. I liked fucking. I didn't like being fucked. So I kept fucking and didn't get fucked. That means, when it's important to define my sexual behaviours, I label myself a "top". *I really need to create a macro for this, like I do with other common questions.*


Melbbi123

I'm bi, so I like to have penetrative sex. But my attraction to penis is mostly as a bottom, as I love the idea of taking a penis, and I like the way things feel in my ass. I think I figured out that I was vers when I first saw transgender porn as a teen, I realised I was more sexually attracted to the dynamics of the relationship than whatever parts or gender the other person has.


necomus

I never liked the idea of anything going into my ass, so I experimented with doing other things. I ate ass one day and fell in love. I don’t know why but I crave it, and I go into a trance when I’m eating a guy out. It just feels natural to me. I also go crazy at the idea of being inside of someone because they’re surrendering themselves or being vulnerable to me. It’s like a literal and metaphysical connection when I’m inside of them. I’ve bottomed a few times and didn’t enjoy it, and I don’t get any physical pleasure from it.


[deleted]

As a bottom who absolutely loves surrendering myself like you describe it's awesome to read this, knowing people can get as hard about the very concept of being inside someone as I get while thinking of someone being inside *me* lol.


Gerdaneu95

A very close second experience to me as well. Once I ate out, I was hooked. And the partner taking me in, sometimes begging and whining (of pleasure, i make sure) it's filling me with adrenaline and the fun is more intimate.


Ralphi2449

Never had to figure it out, it was obvious from the beginning, from the start my sexual fantasies were about bottoming, topping always felt repulsive and could not fit with me


slimsmoothy

I remember very distinctly learning that "homosexuals often engage in sodomy, specifically by penetrating the anus of the receptive partner with the penis of the active partner." (it was like some encyclopedia from the 60s also noting that homosexuals were sometimes violent.). After reading that, my 12 year old self is thinking "Someone's going to put their dick in my butt?" 40 years later I can say to my young self - "Yes, you will take so many dicks." I guess I knew before I even tried it.


aldous__fuxley

Me too


badpuppy83

👍


heres_Buzz

I've found almost ALL gay guys realise they're a bottom (or a top) from their first inkling they realise they're gay. THIS is why I believe we're looking at FAR more than any PHYSICAL sensation.


send_nooooods

I tried topping and bottoming when I lost my virginity so I have always been open to both. With hookups it was a 50/50 , but once I met my bf it became 95% top. Breeding him feels like it has *meaning*, and my sex drive and urge to fuck him is insane. Not trying to humble brag but love set in stone for me that I enjoy both lots, but nothing is better than pounding his ass till it looks like a glazed doughnut.


SmileOnYourLips

The first time I saw the face of another man looking at my swinging semi. In that moment I knew I was a top.


Honest-Wealth7459

Tried them all. For years I claimed to be vers, but I was lying to myself. Didn’t feel like I had the authority to call myself a top bc I wasn’t a big hairy daddy, and that’s what top are supposed to look like, right? Eventually i figured it all out, but it took quite a lot of tries 😄


aldous__fuxley

I'm a bottom and basically only like people who are not big hairy daddies. I am about to travel across the country for dick from a skinny hairless guy with a septum piercing and a rat tail.


Mark_M_in_SF

Cool. I'm a tall, skinny, smooth bottom, and that's a struggle, too (I'm also really old by gay standards - 60). I hope your new top lives up to expectations.


aldous__fuxley

We've already fucked and it was great 🤤


Mark_M_in_SF

Cool! That was fast.


aldous__fuxley

Hahahaha no no we hooked up a year ago and I'm gonna visit


Mark_M_in_SF

Ah. Good visit, then. I'm sure it's going to be if he's worth such a long trip.


mikethepipe2

I think from watching a lot of straight porn and the girls look to be enjoying themselves by having huge dicks up their ass made me wanna try it and as the saying goes once you pop u can’t stop


unnoticed77

That is pretty much why for me too.


Akh_nir

Instinct. I had never even considered toping until I was asked if I wanted to, and I did not want to.


phiretau

I legitimately like it all and most all different types of people, so I’m definitely Verse. The issue with this is that so many people want to put others in a box to understand roles, and the fluid/Vers/switch capacity is often not trusted or understood. My first time being with a man, I bottomed - I liked it. My first time topping a man was with someone I hit on and he was definitely a bottom. I didn’t set out to top but set out to hookup with him and then I realized that I was quite open to being whatever the partner wanted from me. I still don’t have a particular preference but lately I tend to top I think because it’s more convenient for random hookups.


Mark_M_in_SF

It's a lot better than it was when I was young, when it felt like you absolutely had to declare yourself bottom or top, and there was heavy stereotyping (which I still see from a few people on here - the assholes). Back then plenty of guys crossed over outside their roles, but it was seen as a bit bold. Now, at least in the major gay meccas, being vers is seen as being open-minded, and there's no stigma to it. Studies also show that there are more guys who identify as some kind of vers than either top or bottom. I'm vers bottom and happy to be able to top when I want to, and I love to flip fuck.


nowhereman86

It’s tricky and sometimes it changes. I didn’t like bottoming for a long time and considered myself strictly a top. Then I discovered weed/poppers and loved bottoming. I still say I’m vers top because I can enjoy being a top stone cold sober, while it takes substances for me to really enjoy getting fucked.


Blkboyjoy

I found myself getting fucked more than I found myself fucking. I found myself more attractive to assertive, dominant types that enjoy fucking ass. I figured I'm a bottom 🤷🏾‍♂️


Icy_Caregiver2443

TL;DR: Listen to your body! When I was becoming sexually active (about 17), I assumed that as I am attracted to dick I must be a bottom and labelled myself as such. Few years down the lane, I had this urge to top a couple of my hookups the moment I saw their asses naked, especially the morning after I bottomed for them. Unfortunately, I never got to as they were strict tops :'( Eventually, with my current partner I discovered my versatility, although I bottom more often.


AppointmentSerious76

Yeah same happened to me though, I started off as a bottom, enjoyed the sensation of cock in my ass and the cum, ended up looking at my top’s ass and wishing I could go ahead and enjoy it. With my current partner it is the case, and I also end up bottoming more than I do top, and my partner mostly tops, but is a bottom exclusively for me.


huskymusclecub

I have a decently large dick, and when I started hooking up with men they would see it and just want me to fuck them, which I found very enjoyable. I had only topped from 17-25, which i met my husband when I was 25. He said he was a verse bottom, and as we continued to play and i was doing all the fucking, he began to crave my ass more and more. He introduced me to the pleasures of bottoming, and we quickly became fully verse and switch. I love having an ass hungry bearded bear just come after me just as much as I love being an ass hungry cub.


Mark_M_in_SF

Love your story. I wish more guys would at least give both roles a good tryout. They might learn a lot. And I'd love to have either an ass-hungry bear or cub after me. Or vice versa.


huskymusclecub

Thank you. Having an ass hungry bear after you is quite an experience. At least for me. I love bears. Lol


Mark_M_in_SF

Yeah, me too. Alas, being a skinny, smooth man means I'm invisible to almost all of them. Maybe if I carried a pot of honey...


huskymusclecub

Have you initiated the conversation?


Mark_M_in_SF

Yes, at times, though in many cases profiles make it clear I'm not what they're seeking (this is mostly on Scruff). I've been mostly out of the game for some years, but trying to get back a sex life now. Kind of rusty, and very gray.


tighty-whities-tx

Tried both. And honestly they both feel amazing from a physical perspective. Being a bottom is physical but also state of mind to me. I’m taking another man’s dick. I am letting him inside. I get to feel his cum in me and dripping out. I get that full feeling and knowing my partner is inside me where it feels good for me and I am making him feel great too. Plus after you have a prostate orgasm it’s hard to go back and not have one.


Mammoth-Ostrich-4944

Figured out I'm vers by being attracted to men who are strict tops or bottoms and still wanting to have sex with them, so trying it their way lol. I'm like Burger King 😅


ATLguyATL

Special orders don't upset us!


[deleted]

[удалено]


tmrrwswvvs

i love this. kinda same. fascinated with the touch on my ass before anything from a very young age.


[deleted]

I have a below average size penis; I’ve tried topping and it’s always felt like throwing a hot dog down a hallway… not pleasurable enough. Though the few times I’ve fucked women, it’s always felt good. 🤷🏼


ATLguyATL

Even before I had sex, I thought of guys in terms of versatility. I wanted to suck. I wanted to get sucked. I wanted to fuck. I wanted to get fucked. My first experience with sex was sucking dick and it was erotic, so I guess that imprinted on me some. When I was younger (say 20s and 30s), I leaned a little more toward bottom than toward top. I'd say I was 40% top / 60% bottom. But when I wanted to top, it was full throttle. I'd sometimes turn down a guy if he was a top, too, if I was in my top mood. I'd turn down a hot guy to suck if I was in a mood to get sucked only. These days, I'm 95%-plus bottom and cocksucker and semi-submissive. I've really "leaned" into that in the past 10 years an increasing amount and found I'm fascinated with it. I have several FWB that I've serviced for years with no-recip, and the action is hotter than ever. I enjoy the mind fuck of having sucked a guy for years with zero return from him. In fact, I sucked the FWB just last night for what has to be at least the 150th time. We just hit a groove. But who knows? I might flip that switch again one day. Nothing is set in stone.


CalvinJX

It sounds like there's an animal top hibernating deep there.


ATLguyATL

There could be. There certainly was at times in the past.


luvdoc1973

I’m bi. I am a top with women, but a bottom with men. I like both equally. I have topped a few guys, but would rather bottom. My ultimate fantasy is a five way, 3 guys an two women in a free for all. I also really like more than one guy. I love having more dick than I know what to do with.


lunca_tenji

When I see a dick I think “damn I want that in me” when I see an ass I think “damn I wanna be in that” so it was a pretty easy conclusion to come to.


poernerlook

You have to climb to a high place in a night on a full moon and sacrifice a dildo to our lord and savior RuPaul. Only when the fire has devoured the offering completely you may ask what is your role in bed. Once you get answered your fate is sealed and this will be your role for the rest of your life. In all seriousness, just explore and see what is fun and enjoyable for you. Some enjoy topping, some bottoming, some go both ways, some prefer to stick to a specific role when they are with a specific partner but may chance it when with another partner, some don't like anal at all. You are not destined to be anything and your position in bed doesn't define you. Choose what feels right to you and have fun!


yeah-yeah-okay

It was fully instinctual for me. Bottoming has always been my most pressing sexual fantasy, and I knew that before I ever even tried it. in my ideal relationship, I will be the bottom all the time or at least close to all the time. I want to give a top all my love and devotion and let him have his way with me, hehe


countrycutie1410

I just never had the urge to top anyone, whereas I always wanted to be fucked. I think it's wired into me that way.


yongjae3452

Instinct. Never imagined myself as a top in bed when it comes to men. Although I am getting a few urges to top nowadays so let's see. Fingers crossed. Although I would even doubt that I would get to do that cause my man is the toppest top. But I ain't complaining.


lawbrouf

I too was fascinated with my hole growing up and essentially knew I was a bottom subconsciously before I knew what being gay and what gay sex or any sex was. Then once I learned what gay sex was and the societal double standards bottoms face I tried to fancy myself as a top, despite not actually topping. Just kept it to oral my first handful of sexual experiences, with an emphasis on no ass play. But then I gave into my urgings one night with a friend’s sexy uncle who fucked me like the total bottom bitch I was trying to fight and it was the best feeling of my life. I knew there was no use pretending going forward.


kornflakes1989

Tried bottoming, loved it. Tried topping with a masculine man, didn't really enjoy it much. I'll top for femboys as long as we can switch rolls but that's it.


bsiviglia9

Experiment


[deleted]

Not the first time I had sex as a bottom (I labeled me as a verse then) but the first time I did a blowjob. That was the point


luvpain

I knew. Never fucked, always got fucked. So …


[deleted]

When I first started out this top made me his bitch and used me in all sorts of ways. After a while, I tried penetrating this other guy but I couldn't stay hard and my dick was (is) too small anyway. I'm naturally submissive in other aspects of my life too so I just understand that I'm a sub bottom


Gerdaneu95

I wasn't sexually active til shortly before my 22nd birthday. I tried using toys, didn't like it, and I felt indifferent when having anal with others, quickly realised that I am not enjoying getting penetrated, but enjoyed topping much more. Same with using toys on others. Yet, never say never, as the dynamic with other person can change. For now I enjoy being the exclusive top 😉


[deleted]

Haven't had penetrative sex with a guy yet but I know for a fact that I'd be a vers bottom, I'd bottom 90-95% of the time, i don't know it's just a hunch, my heart tells me that I'd be one to take a dick. I've sucked dick and had my dick sucked and I enjoy sucking dick much, much more than getting sucked.


Bttm69

I loved the feeling of a hard cock in my ass


[deleted]

Before I had actual sex I explored with fingers and objects in my ass, and sort of enjoyed it but it didn't blow me away. I assumed I would have to try the real thing to know what I liked. When I lost my virginity, I bottomed and I would say I enjoyed the experience overall but didn't get much pleasure out of it - the next night with the same man I topped and pretty quickly realised that's how I was wired. Technically I am vers, but like 99% top to 1% bottom.


LeoMarius

Instinct


raeltireso96

I tried all of them and decided i liked one far more than the others


[deleted]

By trying all options (more than once) and then deciding which I enjoyed most


OnlyProfessor6495

I had a few bttms eat my ass and I've never felt comfortable with that or anything else going in my ass


[deleted]

I can get extremely turned on by being submissive, bottoming feels so great it makes me feel almost drunk with pleasure, & it felt pretty obvious and so completely right to me from the start😝 And I like how bottoming can be really versatile too, the mood and the intimate dynamics decides how much control I want to have; to lay there passive and happily taking it all, or to ride on top and decide the rhythm myself for a while. (Curious about topping someone tho, but I'd have to use a strap-on cause I'm ftm but sometimes I'm just really curious what it's like to give that kind of intense feeling to a bottom rather than being the one to receive it✌)


starfish071

Not sure how I figured it out... just happened... there are things I like doing with women, and things I like doing with men, and very little of it crosses over.


dautrehomme

I’m vers and a switch, I just really love both. I like getting fucked and being submissive and I love getting dominant whilst fucking. I’ve had a fwb who’s the same and we get on well because of it.


beanie_0

Just fell into it, don’t know what happened 🤷🏻‍♂️ But seriously I’ve just wanted to fuck men in any which way tbh. I lost my virginity to a top, after that every hook up for about a year just happened to be tops and it just sort of fit. Got into a bit of a rut and a ‘bottom mindset’ if you could call it that and got more and more anxious about topping. Finally got my chance and it was terrible. Fast forward to now, I just don’t really care. Love getting fucked and fucking so it depends on the guy 🤷🏻‍♂️


BiJeff

The same way I found out that I'm bi. Experimenting with what I'm curious about and see what I like the most.


yesnoook

The simplicity of just letting go as a bottom is just so magical to me. I love it! ❤


[deleted]

I was with girls early on, and so I "topped" with them. It was never satsifying. It could have been because I was with girls, and I was gay, or because I was a bottom. But the first guy that topped me got me so ready and horny that I couldn't wait for him to top me. I loved it since then.


Highonphaz0n

I like both, that’s really all there is to it!


Ratabilly

I’m a Bi guy and as a kid I was fascinated about trying things in my butt. I think the first thing I slid in was a toothbrush handle when I was in the bath. Things got a little bigger and as a teenager I was actively trying different sizes as I masturbated. It made sense that I’d like a man in me and after the first time I realized just how good it felt, not just having one inside me but also the pleasure of hearing and seeing him enjoy my hole. Bottom for sure.


newsubbottom

I wanted to top but the first guy I was trying to have sex with was a total top so he fucked me like a jackhammer and now I'm a cum-thirsty hole.


mynyddwr

I remember getting fucked a couple of times and one time I asked if I could try topping him. So I did, and then thought getting topped was much nicer.


[deleted]

My dick size. I would want to top but that didn't work out lol


Mark_M_in_SF

By doing everything a lot. I'm vers bottom, and that doesn't mean just bottom. I've fucked a lot of men in my life, and found I just usually prefer to bottom for most men - though flip fucking is the best of all, with a man who knows how to trade positions regularly.


Ami1ucrave

I’ve never topped and my spirit and gut tells me I want to be a bottom so I am a bottom.


dallasindian

Tried both. When I was topping a guy, I kept getting soft and softer. When I tried bottoming for a guy, I kept getting hard and harder.


throwawaypacific123

Got fucked. Felt okay. Tried fucking, but he couldn’t relax enough to penetrate. Stopped trying. He asked to go again and I agreed. Second time getting fucked I loved. Came hands free. Never looked back.


[deleted]

I just knew really. I‘ve never had the desire to top before and getting fucked feels way too good to want to do anything else.


Bi-Cali-Boy

Dude, try it all and see what yoi like! Its that simple. I'm verse, but am happiest on the bottom. Bottoming feels better to me than topping. Pleasure from bottoming comes with practice and patience, so don't expect it to feel amazing ftom the get go.


Fap_King09

I Kinda got stuck as a bottom for lack of experience and topping as a beginner gave me anxiety like I had to preform lol now I like the feeling of bottoming but wish I could be more of a power verse it’s to many nice booties in the world.