Honestly, who give a shit if they try and charge you for having a knife or some other means of self-defense weapon. If it saves you and that child from a potentially violent and life changing situation, then do it. It's better to be judged by a jury of your peers than be traumatized for life or dead. If I was in your situation, I would also start taking some self-defense classes, and I would go as far as getting a firearm (even if it's illegal) and learning how to safely use it. Don't let fear of/limitations of the law be the reason you or that child get killed or seriously injured.
You wouldn't be allowed prepper spray, but a can of brake cleaner in the house for odd jobs is perfectly normal. One with the jet nossle. That in the face will really screw up someone's day.
And you can use anything to hand to protect yourself or your kid.
Get creative, I bet some wasp spray or similar might also work pretty well. maybe some gardening tools?
Sprays that disable him should be valued over anything that forces you to get within arms reach to deliver.
I'll piggy back on this.
I'm in the US so I don't know all that's allowed, but my job requires unannounced, unwelcomed, visits to other people's homes so there's always a safety consideration. We're not allowed to carry any weapons or pepper spray for protection...
However, we are allowed to bring a can of wasp killing spray which is just as effective.
I like the oven cleaner too... But wanted to throw out an alternative.
Is there a way to infer you have a dog? Does the guy no for sure you can't get one?
My uncle carries that in his rv door. He had some get road rage and try to drag him out. He gave the guy a facefull of spray and had no problem getting away.
Coming from former corrections, blunt objects, bjj or any martial arts won’t do shit considering he has size, weight, and obviously experience over you. Even a knife might not discourage him, like sure you might hack wildly and get a couple cuts on his arm but you probably won’t be able to stop the threat and then you run the risk of yourself getting cut in the struggle for the blade. Sprays will be the most effective force multiplier for yourself and your kid (if they’re old enough to understand how they work). I’ve seen 100lb female officers completely shut down massive inmates with oc and tasers. Not sure if taser style weapons pr actual oc is available to you but people here are saying wasp spray or brake cleaner? That’s going to be your best option with you in your current situation. Your only goal is to incapacitate him long enough for you and your kid to get away, you won’t win in a fight.
Bear spray.
In Canada, self defense is heavily regulated. The legal system would be more than willing to ruin your life, if you choose to defend yourself during a home invasion.
Spray the guys with bear spray, then say "I had the bear spray for hiking, I used it only to preserve my life" to the police. Better to say nothing at all, but keeping quite would be a challenge during a emotion state of mind.
replace the screws in the door jam. They are typically less than an inch and thats usually what gives when someone kicks in the door. Replace them with 2 inch long screws.
You can get alarms for you windows, I think ring has something, but literally any contact switch that makes a lot of noise would work.
A baseball bat with a long sock over it. The sock is there so if the attacker grabs the bat, you can slip it out and they are left holding the sock. Keep a ball and/or glove close by for legal reasons.
a long sock looped thru the loop of a big padlock makes for a good swinging device and if anything happens, rip the sock out and it takes too long to put it back thru for them to turn it on you.
There are also wearable panic buttons that connect to your phone, press the button and it calls your emergency services.
a small fire extinguisher can work well as both a hand to hand weapon but can also spray it in the face to create an opportunity to escape.
You can buy unbreakable umbrellas to carry around with you for "sun protection".
If you "spend time outdoors", a machete or hatchet, with a small tent or sleeping bag close by for legal reasons.
Not gonna lie, if I were a women with a kid and this creep was threatening that shit, go to a biker bar, find the man in charge, explain the situation and make a deal with some of his goons to come and break that piece of shits legs. That's what I'd do.
His past crimes are heavily frowned upon in certain communities (excons, biker groups, ect. ). Pay a local chapter a visit. Be prepared to make a small financial donation. Walk away. It will get sorted. There is always a bigger fish.
Order "Night locks" from Amazon etc
They mount to the floor behind your doors, and provide a pretty high level of protection/delay when someone is trying to breach the door.
Knives aren't the solution. Unless you have one correctly shaped and know how to use it well, you're more likely to be injured by it yourself, or overpowered. You want something you can swing reasonably quickly and easily that still has some length, like an axe handle or half a shovel handle. Aerosol cans of anything to the face can be helpful, and coupled with a cigarette lighter, can be used as a makeshift flamethrower. And as always, go hard for the balls if you get the opportunity.
Keep on it with the coppers. They're useless most of the time, but if you keep at them, they will help. We don't do "restraining orders" but an intervention order would be almost certainly granted to you if you apply to the local mag court. If he escalates, an avo can then be placed on him, and breaching that is usually taken fairly seriously.
Good luck. Yell out if you need to. To anyone. Including myself.
Also not a bad idea to let your immediate neighbours know what's going on. It's always good to have an extra pair of eyes (and potentially hands) ready to rock n roll.
OK, potentially different from the mainland, like a lot of things in tassie. Yes, wasp spray is a good one, oven spray is toxic and corrosive, so painful and potentially blinding.
I want to say. Whatever items you get in addition to spray ( baseball bat/ ball & glove etc) don't stop using it.
What i mean is, If you do end up in a situation where you have to use improvised weapons to protect yourself, DO NOT STOP SWINGING UNTIL THEY STOP MOVING.
Don't be cheap. Double tap. Blunt object edition.
And if your child is old enough, go over 911 protocols with them. So they can dial the phone while you fight off an attacker.
Assuming they don't go after the child first. 😬
Absolutely terrifying. Best of luck. I hope the police take this seriously and help you
Buy a gun. Handgun, shotgun, rifle, whatever. Rather be judged by twelve than carried by six. If your country's laws won't protect you and your child then it's up to you.
There's a phrase in America that might relate to you, better to be judged by 12 than be carried by 6. Are you really going to worry about using a knife to protect yourself and a child and being charged with a crime more than keeping you guys alive?
I don't know how the Australian legal system works. But if you have a jury system like in the USA, it's going to be a hell of a time convincing a jury to convict anyone defending themselves from a person with a known violent past history.
How in fuck will a knife get you in trouble? Are people in Australia not allowed to legally cut up their vegetables? Do you just start eat your meet like a lion while the cow is still alive down there?
Asking for a friend that has never been.
It’s a fairly common law. Lots of places prohibit carrying knives of a certain type or size, or all knives, in public unless you require it for professional use.
We have laws like that in the US as well, typically more restrictive in urban and more developed parts of the country.
The logic is that without a good reason, people carrying a knife can use it as a weapon of opportunity, and it’s really not advisable for self-defense, especially if you’re fighting someone bigger than you, because then it’s just an arm wrestling match over the knife. The winner of a knife fight dies in the ambulance, the loser dies on the street
I've cried a bit today. If I knew he was a violent rapist I would have blocked him months ago and not aggravated him. 😞 I'm so scared for my son possibly witnessing anything that may happen.
Small woman vs big aggressive guy.
First of all, forget all sorts of close combat. Knives, bats etc he'll just take from you with ease and they'll be used against you right there. As firearms will be unavailable in your area your best, actually the only bet is to hold out until police arrives. Secure all the entrances so that for example door just cannot be opened with a kick. Doors and windows must buy you enough time to call the police and prepare your next line of defense. Internal doors can be also made lockable and barricadable so if the outer door is failing you can retire behind the next door and block it.
Weapons: boiling water, various acids and bases used for domestic cleaning, preferably in spray form because you do not want to fight the guy face to face, you want to defend your barricade/perimeter until police arrives. They can really spoil someones day and you can ideally deploy them through your barricade. But honestly so much depends on where you live (house, apartment, how many floors, etc, etc) and what possibilities your place provides.
I got my mother a self defense flashlight. It's handheld, some ridiculous brightness you'd never want to look at, and it has spikes on the front end. IDK the exact model but I had some help picking it out from /r/flashlight.
Forget knives and other hand range weapons, they are useless in your situation. If he gets close enough for you to use it, he is waaay to close. You need to have three things. First is make your home as difficult to enter as possible. That includes windows, put some foil on the glass to make it more resistant to shattering. Second is some kind of ranged spray like brake cleaner, wasp spray etc (I assume you can't have proper pepper spray because Australia). Third you need at least two routes for escape that can't be both easily reached from outside at the same time (think front door and back door and some fence in-between). Also alert your neighbours.
Not Australian so don't know your laws, but am Canadian so we share some sensibilities. I think if you started carrying around a switchblade for defence you could be in trouble, but if an attack happened in your home, and you grabbed what you had at hand to defend yourself or your son, so long as you can portray it as grabbing whatever was at hand, they don't HAVE to press charges.
Maybe a hammer is reasonable to have, or a kitchen knife, or brake cleaner, or a fire extinguisher or a machete for gardening or an axe from your camping trip you were just planning on setting off on.
My additional note is to be familiar with using an implement, for example kitchen knives aren't designed for stabbing so it's likely your hand could slip up the handle and slice your fingers. You don't want to compromise yourself in a fight, right? Maybe look into some home reno videos to better learn how to leverage and swing a hammer with controlled power so you aren't flailing in a panic, but it makes absolute sense to explain why a hammer was close to hand (because you were planning a reno as supported by your YouTube history)
A flashlight is a good option as if it's very bright you can disorient and blind your attacker, use that time to run or harm.
If he is bigger and stronger, you don't want to wrestle with him and you want to compromise his biomechanics. That means blind him, break his leg, negate his ability to harm you.
Get motion controlled lights around the exterior, contact your other neighbours, warn them and ask them to keep their eyes open.
It's also Australia, got any thrones spiky poisonous plants you could plant around your property?
Stage hammers throughout the home, it’s cheaper than buying more maglights and is a simple tool instead of a weapon, as you were advised regarding the knife.
Not trying to be that guy or encourage you to commit a crime, but if you were my friend in this situation I would advise being proactive instead of waiting in fear. The police cannot tell you that but I guarantee they were thinking it. If you were one of their daughters they would have kept it to themselves but gone on the offensive immediately. Do with that what you will and don’t ask anyone for help you don’t trust will keep their mouth shut. The minute you become the hunter as opposed to the hunted, the whole paradigm changes.
Good luck to you and I hope this issue resolves itself so you can put it all behind you.
All these tips are great but you should also try some offense. Do you know where he works or lives? Send anonymous tips about how dangerous he is to his landlord, employer etc. Get the cops called on him with something they absolutely can't ignore (trafficking) and hopefully they find something else in the process.
Get a big dog. Dogs are light sleepers who make big scary noises and have big scary teeth. That’s usually enough to make someone think twice, even in the US. Should work even better in Australia since he’s far less likely to have access to a firearm. Take the time to thoroughly train the dig for max benefit.
Pepper spray with a uv marker. Also a dowel for the slider is not as helpful as we would hope. Getting a bar that lodges in the middle is a better option unless you can get security film installed. So sorry you are dealing with this nightmare.
Lighting inside your home should be off. You know where your furniture and walls are. He doesn’t. Exterior lights aimed away from the house to light up anyone approaching. Motion detector alarms in the house downstairs. You both sleep upstairs.
The stars themselves are a strategic bottle neck. If you catch him before he gets upstairs you can stage the fight at the stairs. Gravity is on your side and you know where he will be for that moment in time. Sprays, steel weights, knives, machete, bats and refrigerator, tables. Heavy hard things and weapon’s. You will only have a few seconds so best weapon first. Second best second and that’s all you will have time for. Make it count. Go for the kill.
Can you leave town for a while?
Get a baseball bat and a glove and ball, so you are more save. Put a sock around the bat, so when someone would grap it you can pull it back.
Also i am so sorry for you.
Also, are there people who can help and defend you. Ways you can stay somewhere else?
Also, a giant SUPER LOUD alarm might help scare him off. You dont need an actual alarm just giant speakers and the sound of your alarm on your phone. Make sure to put war protection over your little kid.
It almost sounds like planning when the attack might happen may be required. Send your son to attend a sleep over. Post something on shared social about needing a long hot bath and some wine, with a sexy pic. Even leave your front door open. However, instead of soaking you host a poker night or dinner for the police: or have a couple of military recruiters over, or something.
I'm sorry this is happening to you. A good visible security camera that records to the cloud at every entrance might be enough to deter a home invasion. In terms of weapons, you could consider a flare gun if mace and tasers are illegal where you live. Keep a baseball bat in the house and in your car, just make sure you also have a ball and glove so you have plausible deniability if you need to use it to defend yourself.
i would focus on making it very obvious your house has a very good security system. cameras all over the house and the inside, signs posted at your door mentioning you have always recording cameras around you. make it obvious to this guy if he happened to ever come to your house that if he breaks in their is going to be evidence of it.
Get a roommate. Strength in numbers and a potential witness us deterring.
And cause we're here in ULPT:
Can you find someone who looks like you and give her the master bedroom?
Wasp spray / brake cleaner makes for a very good pepper spray alternative. It's probably the only force equalizer here, cause a guy larger and probably more experienced than you won't be deterred by bats, knives, etc. He'll still overpower you and use them against you.
You have knives already - a steak knife even a letter opener can do some damage. However, you need to learn how to use it and how to stay cool and not panic. Panicking is what gets most people hurt or worse.
Get motion alarms, and I'd get a motion sprayer as well, put something nasty in it, dyed red. Alarms on anything that opens into your place.
Make sure EVERYBODY knows this guy is stalking you! All friends, family, I mean everybody! If anything happens they know where to look.
Can you use bear spray? If not wasp spray can help deter people. I'd have a few cans sitting around.
If you do get attacked go for the knees and once down pound those knees multiple times and get his crotch. The goal is for him to never walk again or at least be in pain for the rest of his life.
Again the main key is not to panic - a defence class will help
From an experienced solo outback camper...a super high candlepower hand held spotlight will disable anyone and give you plenty of time to get out and get help. No permanent damage caused, but the perp will be blinded and stuck in place for a while.
This may be simple and old school but add hard small gravel to areas around your house and roses or thorny bushes planted under each window. You’ll hear him coming and he’ll hurt himself trying to get in.
I think you should move. By staying where you are you are basically signing up for a fight to the death. And even if you win, you’ll have to live with taking someone’s life. That’s a heavy experience to go through. It’s far easier to break a lease, rent another place, and move all your stuff. And then you can keep the new address hidden/ secret. Go stay with a friend until you can move into a new place. Maybe consider deliberately posting incorrect info on social media to lead him in the opposite direction. He can’t hurt you if he can’t find you. Also, try to never be alone.
Get somewhere safe if you can or someone for protection.
Is the plan keepin on going with that creep living rent free in your head ?
Only distance, or the more definitive solution will resolve the situation, you can’t be a prisoner in your own home forever, love.
Please leave a message somewhere to say you’re safe at some point
You got this
Which state are you in. Laws vary a bit state by state. However if a big strong man attacks you in your home and you defend yourself with a knife because you feared for your life you will not get in trouble legally for it.
tasmania - apparently if i happen to grab a kitchen knife because im attacked in the kitchen that's fine, but keeping a folding knife under my pillow and waiting for an attack isn't fine re. self defence because i had predetermined intent to harm someone i think?
I’m not that familiar with Tassie laws. But there’s some good information in some of these answers. The really key ones don’t use a weapon that’s likely to get taken off you. If you can do some of the home maintenance ones that will help a fair bit. The door screws is a particularly good one. However people forget locks and the like are mostly to keep opportunists out. Someone really determined will break a window and climb through.
Having friendly neighbours who can back you up and if you have any way of getting a spray of some sort is most likely going to be your best bet. Sprays aren’t legal in Tassie but neither is attacking someone and if he doesn’t care about that you might not have much choice. If something does happen keep saying to the cops and judges if it gets to that, “He said he was going to kill me and my baby”. I had no choice he was coming at me saying he was going to kill us both. I panicked and grabbed the spray. I thought he was going to kill me and my baby.
At worst you’ll cop a fine. No judge is going to do anything to a little female with a baby defending herself from a known threat.
Also I’d stop replying to him. Don’t engage with him at all and hope he gets bored and moves onto someone else. Meanwhile get that restraining order.
It’s not quite universal, but the way I understand taking a life in self-defense, 3 criteria need to be met before any lethal force can be authorized and it stops as soon as the attacker stops. The big 3 are means, intent, and opportunity. If someone has a weapon, calls you on the phone and says they’re going to kill you, but doesn’t do anything, all 3 criteria aren’t met as they don’t have the opportunity to. Likewise if a person breaks into your house, says they’re going to kill you, but doesn’t have the “means” to do it with a weapon, the 3 criteria aren’t met.
Getting further into the weeds of it though, there are considerations taken if something a common person would agree is an advantage or a disadvantage. This is how stand your ground laws came about, for example, a mother with a small child has no duty to retreat as she’s protecting that child, running with them would put them at a disadvantage. If you have multiple assailants, ie in a dark alleyway, 3-4 big looking thugs decide to rob you and beat you within an inch of your life, if you grab a lead pipe at the last second and kill 2 in defense, you would be less likely to be found at fault as no one should REASONABLY be expected to go along with an assault and risk death if they’re outnumbered.
This varies state to state, so the chief caveat, check your country, state and local laws to a T, ask a lawyer or use a paralegal service to look it up, talk to an off duty cop/off record (these laws apply to them as well, this is why so many deaths go to trial in their line of work to determine if they were justified or not).
Edit: not a lawyer or police, just needed to know self defense laws in order to carry a firearm concealed/best practice.
Also loss of life/limb/eyesight/rape qualifies as “reasonable defense of life.” Of course the burden of proof is on the defender.
As I’m thinking of your situation more info comes to mind: in the event of the home invasion, obviously call the police/emergency line, keep them on the phone! The sound recording is admissible in court, and if they can hear and see (security footage) this guy forcing his way into your house, there would be no doubt about why you had to defend yourself. If he is still outside by the time police show up, then you can also identify if it’s them knocking on the door or him still trying to gain entry.
Additionally, in my country/area, I’ve heard of people with an active restraining order on someone or a previous police report of an assault being able to apply for a protective carry license to further protect themselves. I think they want the restraining order in order to increase paper trail/visibility.
That’s a textbook legal answer, but in reality, nobody would really know if you had been in your kitchen or bedroom when the home invasion started.
Keep whatever makes you feel safe next to your bed. I have a framing hammer sticking out of my tool bag. Then tell them that you were in the kitchen or whatever and retreated to the bedroom to hide
I'm from the US so idk if this works for you, but camping stores often sell machetes for bush clearing and paring knives for fish gutting. And hey, there's nothing illegal about keeping your camping supplies near your bed. You could keep it in a tackle box to both keep it concealed and as plausible deniability. You can also look into anti-rape devices (like the Rapex condom that was going around) and see if you can buy or DIY something similar.
Get a dog and look into protection dogs. I'm not talking about an attack dog. You can breeders who specifically train dogs to do things like alert or go and clear the whole house before you enter. That's what can make them so great for vets with PTSD.
Dogs, a small yappy one and two big ones. I cannot overstate how vicious dogs will get when it comes to protecting their family.
Buy a shotgun. It's australia but you can still get one. Put a laser on it so you don't have to aim. Practice with it. If you shoot him with it finish the job. No one is going to convict a mom defending you and your baby.
Window Security Film. Not sure what it's called in australia but it is a stick on clear film applied to the glass of windows. When the glass is struck it keeps the window in one piece. A person can break through the film eventually but it will take several minutes since you need to break the entire window and punch through the film. Usually made by the company 3M. Usually pretty cheap compared to bars
Tell your neighbors what's happening and give the guys pictures to them.
Glass break alarms. Small cheap devices available on Amazon. They don't need to be linked to a security system. They listen for the specific sound of plate window glass shattering or some mount directly on glass sense the shatter and then start alarming.
Wasp spray has excellent range and will blind them.
At the least replace all screws in hinges with long screws. They sell door hardening kits and boy do they work.
Have two exits. Reinforce internal doors. Move your kid and you to a central room. Construct a safe room if possible. Make sure it has an exit in case he kids wild and starts a fire.
Increase your house insurance
Don’t rely on a weapon, if he’s stronger than you the chances are that he’ll get it away from you and use it on you. Cameras, motion sensors, really good locks, and a big dog.
Get a good dog or two. By far the safest way for you to go. They become loyal to YOU and will tear apart anyone who goes after you. Everything else can turn against you, as in he can get it and hurt you.
I see you can't. Sigh.
In terms of something that could be used as a defensive weapon a cordless chainsaw might do the trick. Close quarters combat are a bad situation to be in having a drastic size disadvantage, but couple that with some wasp spray and you might come out ok. The good thing about the saw is the business end is fairly good sized compared to the overall size of the tool so it may be more difficult to wrestle away than other items. What you need to also do is take a look at your home. Arrange furniture to allow for escape while mixing in heavy objects to use as emergency weapons. You should also set up things in choke points that you can quickly deploy to trip or tangle him up. Even something as simple as a dining room chair next to a doorway can buy some time. Tip it over into the doorway as you exit. It is still an obstacle that he has to spend a couple of seconds moving or stepping over. Plan out your escape routes. The key here is maintain space between him and you.
Also, I recommend learning some jujutsu in the meantime or some grappling. I learned when I was about 100 pounds as a small woman and was able to disable and disarm a man more than twice my size. It’s more about skill than strength.
Get somewhere safe if you can or someone for protection.
Is the plan keepin on going with that creep living rent free in your head ?
Only distance, or the more definitive solution will resolve the situation, you can’t be a prisoner in your own home forever, love.
Please leave a message somewhere to say you’re safe at some point
You got this
Honestly, who give a shit if they try and charge you for having a knife or some other means of self-defense weapon. If it saves you and that child from a potentially violent and life changing situation, then do it. It's better to be judged by a jury of your peers than be traumatized for life or dead. If I was in your situation, I would also start taking some self-defense classes, and I would go as far as getting a firearm (even if it's illegal) and learning how to safely use it. Don't let fear of/limitations of the law be the reason you or that child get killed or seriously injured.
Agreed 1000%. The law doesnt exist to protect anyone, it only exists to punish after the fact.
How would they know it was your, and not his knife, or gun, that he sat down.
You wouldn't be allowed prepper spray, but a can of brake cleaner in the house for odd jobs is perfectly normal. One with the jet nossle. That in the face will really screw up someone's day. And you can use anything to hand to protect yourself or your kid.
Get creative, I bet some wasp spray or similar might also work pretty well. maybe some gardening tools? Sprays that disable him should be valued over anything that forces you to get within arms reach to deliver.
I'll piggy back on this. I'm in the US so I don't know all that's allowed, but my job requires unannounced, unwelcomed, visits to other people's homes so there's always a safety consideration. We're not allowed to carry any weapons or pepper spray for protection... However, we are allowed to bring a can of wasp killing spray which is just as effective. I like the oven cleaner too... But wanted to throw out an alternative. Is there a way to infer you have a dog? Does the guy no for sure you can't get one?
My uncle carries that in his rv door. He had some get road rage and try to drag him out. He gave the guy a facefull of spray and had no problem getting away.
Wasp spray can spray over 20ft. I know receptionists and people that work alone in offices that keep it under the desk in the event of at threat.
Consider getting a dog to wake you upon intrusion..
And just happen to have a lighter nearby, = flamethrower. You had ironically just watched a tic-tok about it that week!
Wasp spray. Highly illegal but effective.
Not illegal where I've lived.
I live in Florida where you can shoot people if you feel threatened, and it’s illegal. Same way with things that fire knife blades. ?? Weird.
Coming from former corrections, blunt objects, bjj or any martial arts won’t do shit considering he has size, weight, and obviously experience over you. Even a knife might not discourage him, like sure you might hack wildly and get a couple cuts on his arm but you probably won’t be able to stop the threat and then you run the risk of yourself getting cut in the struggle for the blade. Sprays will be the most effective force multiplier for yourself and your kid (if they’re old enough to understand how they work). I’ve seen 100lb female officers completely shut down massive inmates with oc and tasers. Not sure if taser style weapons pr actual oc is available to you but people here are saying wasp spray or brake cleaner? That’s going to be your best option with you in your current situation. Your only goal is to incapacitate him long enough for you and your kid to get away, you won’t win in a fight.
Bear spray. In Canada, self defense is heavily regulated. The legal system would be more than willing to ruin your life, if you choose to defend yourself during a home invasion. Spray the guys with bear spray, then say "I had the bear spray for hiking, I used it only to preserve my life" to the police. Better to say nothing at all, but keeping quite would be a challenge during a emotion state of mind.
replace the screws in the door jam. They are typically less than an inch and thats usually what gives when someone kicks in the door. Replace them with 2 inch long screws. You can get alarms for you windows, I think ring has something, but literally any contact switch that makes a lot of noise would work. A baseball bat with a long sock over it. The sock is there so if the attacker grabs the bat, you can slip it out and they are left holding the sock. Keep a ball and/or glove close by for legal reasons. a long sock looped thru the loop of a big padlock makes for a good swinging device and if anything happens, rip the sock out and it takes too long to put it back thru for them to turn it on you. There are also wearable panic buttons that connect to your phone, press the button and it calls your emergency services. a small fire extinguisher can work well as both a hand to hand weapon but can also spray it in the face to create an opportunity to escape. You can buy unbreakable umbrellas to carry around with you for "sun protection". If you "spend time outdoors", a machete or hatchet, with a small tent or sleeping bag close by for legal reasons.
Alot of good ideas here.
Not gonna lie, if I were a women with a kid and this creep was threatening that shit, go to a biker bar, find the man in charge, explain the situation and make a deal with some of his goons to come and break that piece of shits legs. That's what I'd do.
Not saying anyone should, but this is the actual solution
His past crimes are heavily frowned upon in certain communities (excons, biker groups, ect. ). Pay a local chapter a visit. Be prepared to make a small financial donation. Walk away. It will get sorted. There is always a bigger fish.
Order "Night locks" from Amazon etc They mount to the floor behind your doors, and provide a pretty high level of protection/delay when someone is trying to breach the door.
Use them in conjunction with an extra lock up top. Nightlock on its own may allow the upper half of the door to be compromised.
Good point. I'd add a reinforced jam and long screws to your suggestion.
Wasp spray!
Knives aren't the solution. Unless you have one correctly shaped and know how to use it well, you're more likely to be injured by it yourself, or overpowered. You want something you can swing reasonably quickly and easily that still has some length, like an axe handle or half a shovel handle. Aerosol cans of anything to the face can be helpful, and coupled with a cigarette lighter, can be used as a makeshift flamethrower. And as always, go hard for the balls if you get the opportunity. Keep on it with the coppers. They're useless most of the time, but if you keep at them, they will help. We don't do "restraining orders" but an intervention order would be almost certainly granted to you if you apply to the local mag court. If he escalates, an avo can then be placed on him, and breaching that is usually taken fairly seriously. Good luck. Yell out if you need to. To anyone. Including myself.
The paperwork I got from the police officer says Restraining Order on the top - in Tassie I think I'll buy some wasp spray!
Also not a bad idea to let your immediate neighbours know what's going on. It's always good to have an extra pair of eyes (and potentially hands) ready to rock n roll.
OK, potentially different from the mainland, like a lot of things in tassie. Yes, wasp spray is a good one, oven spray is toxic and corrosive, so painful and potentially blinding.
I want to say. Whatever items you get in addition to spray ( baseball bat/ ball & glove etc) don't stop using it. What i mean is, If you do end up in a situation where you have to use improvised weapons to protect yourself, DO NOT STOP SWINGING UNTIL THEY STOP MOVING. Don't be cheap. Double tap. Blunt object edition. And if your child is old enough, go over 911 protocols with them. So they can dial the phone while you fight off an attacker. Assuming they don't go after the child first. 😬 Absolutely terrifying. Best of luck. I hope the police take this seriously and help you
Buy a gun. Handgun, shotgun, rifle, whatever. Rather be judged by twelve than carried by six. If your country's laws won't protect you and your child then it's up to you.
There's a phrase in America that might relate to you, better to be judged by 12 than be carried by 6. Are you really going to worry about using a knife to protect yourself and a child and being charged with a crime more than keeping you guys alive? I don't know how the Australian legal system works. But if you have a jury system like in the USA, it's going to be a hell of a time convincing a jury to convict anyone defending themselves from a person with a known violent past history.
How in fuck will a knife get you in trouble? Are people in Australia not allowed to legally cut up their vegetables? Do you just start eat your meet like a lion while the cow is still alive down there? Asking for a friend that has never been.
It’s a fairly common law. Lots of places prohibit carrying knives of a certain type or size, or all knives, in public unless you require it for professional use. We have laws like that in the US as well, typically more restrictive in urban and more developed parts of the country. The logic is that without a good reason, people carrying a knife can use it as a weapon of opportunity, and it’s really not advisable for self-defense, especially if you’re fighting someone bigger than you, because then it’s just an arm wrestling match over the knife. The winner of a knife fight dies in the ambulance, the loser dies on the street
Okay. No knife outside the house kinda makes sense.
I've got a wooden bat under my bed, a metal variant would also be sufficient :)
Please keep a glove or at least ball as well.
Louisville slugger
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I've cried a bit today. If I knew he was a violent rapist I would have blocked him months ago and not aggravated him. 😞 I'm so scared for my son possibly witnessing anything that may happen.
You couldnt know. Dont blame yourself. I am so sorry
Small woman vs big aggressive guy. First of all, forget all sorts of close combat. Knives, bats etc he'll just take from you with ease and they'll be used against you right there. As firearms will be unavailable in your area your best, actually the only bet is to hold out until police arrives. Secure all the entrances so that for example door just cannot be opened with a kick. Doors and windows must buy you enough time to call the police and prepare your next line of defense. Internal doors can be also made lockable and barricadable so if the outer door is failing you can retire behind the next door and block it. Weapons: boiling water, various acids and bases used for domestic cleaning, preferably in spray form because you do not want to fight the guy face to face, you want to defend your barricade/perimeter until police arrives. They can really spoil someones day and you can ideally deploy them through your barricade. But honestly so much depends on where you live (house, apartment, how many floors, etc, etc) and what possibilities your place provides.
I got my mother a self defense flashlight. It's handheld, some ridiculous brightness you'd never want to look at, and it has spikes on the front end. IDK the exact model but I had some help picking it out from /r/flashlight.
Forget knives and other hand range weapons, they are useless in your situation. If he gets close enough for you to use it, he is waaay to close. You need to have three things. First is make your home as difficult to enter as possible. That includes windows, put some foil on the glass to make it more resistant to shattering. Second is some kind of ranged spray like brake cleaner, wasp spray etc (I assume you can't have proper pepper spray because Australia). Third you need at least two routes for escape that can't be both easily reached from outside at the same time (think front door and back door and some fence in-between). Also alert your neighbours.
Not Australian so don't know your laws, but am Canadian so we share some sensibilities. I think if you started carrying around a switchblade for defence you could be in trouble, but if an attack happened in your home, and you grabbed what you had at hand to defend yourself or your son, so long as you can portray it as grabbing whatever was at hand, they don't HAVE to press charges. Maybe a hammer is reasonable to have, or a kitchen knife, or brake cleaner, or a fire extinguisher or a machete for gardening or an axe from your camping trip you were just planning on setting off on. My additional note is to be familiar with using an implement, for example kitchen knives aren't designed for stabbing so it's likely your hand could slip up the handle and slice your fingers. You don't want to compromise yourself in a fight, right? Maybe look into some home reno videos to better learn how to leverage and swing a hammer with controlled power so you aren't flailing in a panic, but it makes absolute sense to explain why a hammer was close to hand (because you were planning a reno as supported by your YouTube history) A flashlight is a good option as if it's very bright you can disorient and blind your attacker, use that time to run or harm. If he is bigger and stronger, you don't want to wrestle with him and you want to compromise his biomechanics. That means blind him, break his leg, negate his ability to harm you. Get motion controlled lights around the exterior, contact your other neighbours, warn them and ask them to keep their eyes open. It's also Australia, got any thrones spiky poisonous plants you could plant around your property?
Stage hammers throughout the home, it’s cheaper than buying more maglights and is a simple tool instead of a weapon, as you were advised regarding the knife. Not trying to be that guy or encourage you to commit a crime, but if you were my friend in this situation I would advise being proactive instead of waiting in fear. The police cannot tell you that but I guarantee they were thinking it. If you were one of their daughters they would have kept it to themselves but gone on the offensive immediately. Do with that what you will and don’t ask anyone for help you don’t trust will keep their mouth shut. The minute you become the hunter as opposed to the hunted, the whole paradigm changes. Good luck to you and I hope this issue resolves itself so you can put it all behind you.
Practice hiding and being quiet with your son. He should know what to do.
All these tips are great but you should also try some offense. Do you know where he works or lives? Send anonymous tips about how dangerous he is to his landlord, employer etc. Get the cops called on him with something they absolutely can't ignore (trafficking) and hopefully they find something else in the process.
Get a big dog. Dogs are light sleepers who make big scary noises and have big scary teeth. That’s usually enough to make someone think twice, even in the US. Should work even better in Australia since he’s far less likely to have access to a firearm. Take the time to thoroughly train the dig for max benefit.
Guard dog.
Pepper spray with a uv marker. Also a dowel for the slider is not as helpful as we would hope. Getting a bar that lodges in the middle is a better option unless you can get security film installed. So sorry you are dealing with this nightmare.
Cross bow?
Lighting inside your home should be off. You know where your furniture and walls are. He doesn’t. Exterior lights aimed away from the house to light up anyone approaching. Motion detector alarms in the house downstairs. You both sleep upstairs. The stars themselves are a strategic bottle neck. If you catch him before he gets upstairs you can stage the fight at the stairs. Gravity is on your side and you know where he will be for that moment in time. Sprays, steel weights, knives, machete, bats and refrigerator, tables. Heavy hard things and weapon’s. You will only have a few seconds so best weapon first. Second best second and that’s all you will have time for. Make it count. Go for the kill. Can you leave town for a while?
Every answer was going to be buy a gun, they even things out between women and men... but in Aussieland the answer is move away and hide.
Just get a pump action shotgun, 99% of people will run when they hear the unmistakable sound of a shotgun being racked
Is he on probation? If so, report his actions.
Get a big dog and treat it good
Get a baseball bat and a glove and ball, so you are more save. Put a sock around the bat, so when someone would grap it you can pull it back. Also i am so sorry for you. Also, are there people who can help and defend you. Ways you can stay somewhere else?
Also, a giant SUPER LOUD alarm might help scare him off. You dont need an actual alarm just giant speakers and the sound of your alarm on your phone. Make sure to put war protection over your little kid.
It almost sounds like planning when the attack might happen may be required. Send your son to attend a sleep over. Post something on shared social about needing a long hot bath and some wine, with a sexy pic. Even leave your front door open. However, instead of soaking you host a poker night or dinner for the police: or have a couple of military recruiters over, or something.
I'm sorry this is happening to you. A good visible security camera that records to the cloud at every entrance might be enough to deter a home invasion. In terms of weapons, you could consider a flare gun if mace and tasers are illegal where you live. Keep a baseball bat in the house and in your car, just make sure you also have a ball and glove so you have plausible deniability if you need to use it to defend yourself.
Small woman with a baseball bat indoors against a big guy is pretty stupid advice.
i would focus on making it very obvious your house has a very good security system. cameras all over the house and the inside, signs posted at your door mentioning you have always recording cameras around you. make it obvious to this guy if he happened to ever come to your house that if he breaks in their is going to be evidence of it.
Get a roommate. Strength in numbers and a potential witness us deterring. And cause we're here in ULPT: Can you find someone who looks like you and give her the master bedroom?
Powerdrill with a 2 -3 inch hole saw isn't a knife FYI.
Wasp spray / brake cleaner makes for a very good pepper spray alternative. It's probably the only force equalizer here, cause a guy larger and probably more experienced than you won't be deterred by bats, knives, etc. He'll still overpower you and use them against you.
You have knives already - a steak knife even a letter opener can do some damage. However, you need to learn how to use it and how to stay cool and not panic. Panicking is what gets most people hurt or worse. Get motion alarms, and I'd get a motion sprayer as well, put something nasty in it, dyed red. Alarms on anything that opens into your place. Make sure EVERYBODY knows this guy is stalking you! All friends, family, I mean everybody! If anything happens they know where to look. Can you use bear spray? If not wasp spray can help deter people. I'd have a few cans sitting around. If you do get attacked go for the knees and once down pound those knees multiple times and get his crotch. The goal is for him to never walk again or at least be in pain for the rest of his life. Again the main key is not to panic - a defence class will help
I’d seriously consider moving to another country. Your safety and peace of mind for you and your child would be worth it.
From an experienced solo outback camper...a super high candlepower hand held spotlight will disable anyone and give you plenty of time to get out and get help. No permanent damage caused, but the perp will be blinded and stuck in place for a while.
This may be simple and old school but add hard small gravel to areas around your house and roses or thorny bushes planted under each window. You’ll hear him coming and he’ll hurt himself trying to get in.
I think you should move. By staying where you are you are basically signing up for a fight to the death. And even if you win, you’ll have to live with taking someone’s life. That’s a heavy experience to go through. It’s far easier to break a lease, rent another place, and move all your stuff. And then you can keep the new address hidden/ secret. Go stay with a friend until you can move into a new place. Maybe consider deliberately posting incorrect info on social media to lead him in the opposite direction. He can’t hurt you if he can’t find you. Also, try to never be alone.
Get somewhere safe if you can or someone for protection. Is the plan keepin on going with that creep living rent free in your head ? Only distance, or the more definitive solution will resolve the situation, you can’t be a prisoner in your own home forever, love. Please leave a message somewhere to say you’re safe at some point You got this
Or as someone once said "Would you rather have your child visit you in prison or visit your child in a cemetery?" If you survive.
Which state are you in. Laws vary a bit state by state. However if a big strong man attacks you in your home and you defend yourself with a knife because you feared for your life you will not get in trouble legally for it.
tasmania - apparently if i happen to grab a kitchen knife because im attacked in the kitchen that's fine, but keeping a folding knife under my pillow and waiting for an attack isn't fine re. self defence because i had predetermined intent to harm someone i think?
OR You often cut and eat fruit while watching tv in bed in the evenings. The kitchen knife happened to be in your bedroom when the intruder was there.
I’m not that familiar with Tassie laws. But there’s some good information in some of these answers. The really key ones don’t use a weapon that’s likely to get taken off you. If you can do some of the home maintenance ones that will help a fair bit. The door screws is a particularly good one. However people forget locks and the like are mostly to keep opportunists out. Someone really determined will break a window and climb through. Having friendly neighbours who can back you up and if you have any way of getting a spray of some sort is most likely going to be your best bet. Sprays aren’t legal in Tassie but neither is attacking someone and if he doesn’t care about that you might not have much choice. If something does happen keep saying to the cops and judges if it gets to that, “He said he was going to kill me and my baby”. I had no choice he was coming at me saying he was going to kill us both. I panicked and grabbed the spray. I thought he was going to kill me and my baby. At worst you’ll cop a fine. No judge is going to do anything to a little female with a baby defending herself from a known threat. Also I’d stop replying to him. Don’t engage with him at all and hope he gets bored and moves onto someone else. Meanwhile get that restraining order.
It’s not quite universal, but the way I understand taking a life in self-defense, 3 criteria need to be met before any lethal force can be authorized and it stops as soon as the attacker stops. The big 3 are means, intent, and opportunity. If someone has a weapon, calls you on the phone and says they’re going to kill you, but doesn’t do anything, all 3 criteria aren’t met as they don’t have the opportunity to. Likewise if a person breaks into your house, says they’re going to kill you, but doesn’t have the “means” to do it with a weapon, the 3 criteria aren’t met. Getting further into the weeds of it though, there are considerations taken if something a common person would agree is an advantage or a disadvantage. This is how stand your ground laws came about, for example, a mother with a small child has no duty to retreat as she’s protecting that child, running with them would put them at a disadvantage. If you have multiple assailants, ie in a dark alleyway, 3-4 big looking thugs decide to rob you and beat you within an inch of your life, if you grab a lead pipe at the last second and kill 2 in defense, you would be less likely to be found at fault as no one should REASONABLY be expected to go along with an assault and risk death if they’re outnumbered. This varies state to state, so the chief caveat, check your country, state and local laws to a T, ask a lawyer or use a paralegal service to look it up, talk to an off duty cop/off record (these laws apply to them as well, this is why so many deaths go to trial in their line of work to determine if they were justified or not). Edit: not a lawyer or police, just needed to know self defense laws in order to carry a firearm concealed/best practice. Also loss of life/limb/eyesight/rape qualifies as “reasonable defense of life.” Of course the burden of proof is on the defender.
As I’m thinking of your situation more info comes to mind: in the event of the home invasion, obviously call the police/emergency line, keep them on the phone! The sound recording is admissible in court, and if they can hear and see (security footage) this guy forcing his way into your house, there would be no doubt about why you had to defend yourself. If he is still outside by the time police show up, then you can also identify if it’s them knocking on the door or him still trying to gain entry. Additionally, in my country/area, I’ve heard of people with an active restraining order on someone or a previous police report of an assault being able to apply for a protective carry license to further protect themselves. I think they want the restraining order in order to increase paper trail/visibility.
That’s a textbook legal answer, but in reality, nobody would really know if you had been in your kitchen or bedroom when the home invasion started. Keep whatever makes you feel safe next to your bed. I have a framing hammer sticking out of my tool bag. Then tell them that you were in the kitchen or whatever and retreated to the bedroom to hide
how about a drill with a fully charged battery. Obviously keep it out of reach of the 4yold... good luck.
I'm from the US so idk if this works for you, but camping stores often sell machetes for bush clearing and paring knives for fish gutting. And hey, there's nothing illegal about keeping your camping supplies near your bed. You could keep it in a tackle box to both keep it concealed and as plausible deniability. You can also look into anti-rape devices (like the Rapex condom that was going around) and see if you can buy or DIY something similar.
Get a dog and look into protection dogs. I'm not talking about an attack dog. You can breeders who specifically train dogs to do things like alert or go and clear the whole house before you enter. That's what can make them so great for vets with PTSD.
Dogs, a small yappy one and two big ones. I cannot overstate how vicious dogs will get when it comes to protecting their family. Buy a shotgun. It's australia but you can still get one. Put a laser on it so you don't have to aim. Practice with it. If you shoot him with it finish the job. No one is going to convict a mom defending you and your baby. Window Security Film. Not sure what it's called in australia but it is a stick on clear film applied to the glass of windows. When the glass is struck it keeps the window in one piece. A person can break through the film eventually but it will take several minutes since you need to break the entire window and punch through the film. Usually made by the company 3M. Usually pretty cheap compared to bars Tell your neighbors what's happening and give the guys pictures to them. Glass break alarms. Small cheap devices available on Amazon. They don't need to be linked to a security system. They listen for the specific sound of plate window glass shattering or some mount directly on glass sense the shatter and then start alarming. Wasp spray has excellent range and will blind them. At the least replace all screws in hinges with long screws. They sell door hardening kits and boy do they work. Have two exits. Reinforce internal doors. Move your kid and you to a central room. Construct a safe room if possible. Make sure it has an exit in case he kids wild and starts a fire. Increase your house insurance
Don’t rely on a weapon, if he’s stronger than you the chances are that he’ll get it away from you and use it on you. Cameras, motion sensors, really good locks, and a big dog.
Wasp spray
Get a good dog or two. By far the safest way for you to go. They become loyal to YOU and will tear apart anyone who goes after you. Everything else can turn against you, as in he can get it and hurt you. I see you can't. Sigh.
In terms of something that could be used as a defensive weapon a cordless chainsaw might do the trick. Close quarters combat are a bad situation to be in having a drastic size disadvantage, but couple that with some wasp spray and you might come out ok. The good thing about the saw is the business end is fairly good sized compared to the overall size of the tool so it may be more difficult to wrestle away than other items. What you need to also do is take a look at your home. Arrange furniture to allow for escape while mixing in heavy objects to use as emergency weapons. You should also set up things in choke points that you can quickly deploy to trip or tangle him up. Even something as simple as a dining room chair next to a doorway can buy some time. Tip it over into the doorway as you exit. It is still an obstacle that he has to spend a couple of seconds moving or stepping over. Plan out your escape routes. The key here is maintain space between him and you.
Can you get a dog(s)?
Also, I recommend learning some jujutsu in the meantime or some grappling. I learned when I was about 100 pounds as a small woman and was able to disable and disarm a man more than twice my size. It’s more about skill than strength.
Get somewhere safe if you can or someone for protection. Is the plan keepin on going with that creep living rent free in your head ? Only distance, or the more definitive solution will resolve the situation, you can’t be a prisoner in your own home forever, love. Please leave a message somewhere to say you’re safe at some point You got this