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unexBot

**OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:** >!Bonk!< ***** **Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description?** **Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.** ***** [*Look at my source code on Github*](https://github.com/Artraxon/unexBot) [*What is this for?*](https://www.reddit.com/r/Unexpected/comments/dnuaju/introducing_unexbot_a_new_bot_to_improve_the/)


Dinglederple

Did not expect that. Holy shit


[deleted]

~~Emotional~~ **Brain Damage**


perdew1292

My son is such a faiiiilure!


Thfoxpz

ever since the day I was born


Lady-Of-Renville-202

Drugs is what they used to say I was on.


FixedLoad

They say I never knew which way I was orange.


[deleted]

[удалено]


BreezyBadger420

More likely it gave them a concussion and temporary| permanent neurological deficiencies. There was no justification for someone potentially killing this person for standing unthreateningly while nude. At best, this was someone with existing mental deficiencies that needed help, either due to mental|physical illness or even as a side effect of medication to treat said illness. There was no "knocking sense" into this individual. There was only attempted murder to an innocent person.


tcassa

Well said. Obviously a mental disorder. My son did this very thing in public before we realized he had developed schizophrenia. I truly hope this disgusting attacker gets a full prosecution for doing this. No words to discribe the gamut of emotions seeing this sets off in me.


Houjix

You can’t brain damage something that’s already been brain damaged


Capable_Emu420

Good thing he had a mask on


The_Leo_16

I was about to say this!


Over-Marionberry-686

Me too


yookoke1122

Defense +1 Mouth/nose injury resistance +10% Corona virus resistance +70% If worn while naked, autism +100%


FirstChAoS

You definitely want to avoid mouse injuries. Their little teeth are sharp.


BusyTurn3871

Julius cheezer knows that too.


yookoke1122

Patch update: fixed spelling error in the description of unique helmet “mask”


m42_mave

What Civ is it? Berbers ?


[deleted]

I want to put that mask on the blurred out penis


BusyTurn3871

In Thailand the penis is common to see in temples and amulets.


Jumpin-Jebus

Don't want to be unsanitary....


[deleted]

Kept all his teeth close by


H3LL_0U

He did become kinda famous after this lol. Not in a good wat though...


[deleted]

he alive?!


[deleted]

In full video hes on floor for moment then stand up and runs after the men hitting him for revenge so yeah id expect he is


Gryse_Blacolar

Link pls?


[deleted]

Here it is https://youtu.be/d0VV-k8TVhY


earthlings_all

“Lock the door, lock the door, lock the door, lock the door” Dude put your fucking phone down for one second and do it yourself. It’s like they forget they also have fingers.


void_evilness

Then who’s going to film this for our entertainment?


lapsangsouchogn

He took a hard hit to the reset button


[deleted]

[удалено]


Ydeas

TMW he's too homophobe to go in for the tackle


Febzee2

One guy to the other, "I wouldn't touch him with a 2 foot stick " The other guy: "How about a three foot pole?" *Hefts sign post with malicious intent*


LoganSterling

he literally hit him with steel sign post..☠️


Ydeas

Definitely aggravated assault


ConcentratePrimary62

ASSault


ALexusOhHaiNyan

Damn. I thought he was a “too old for this shit” janitor trying to get off the escalator and go about his job. Mistook the sign post for one of those extended dustpans that most service industry’s have. Maybe his homo-panic was triggered like above suggested? Maybe he’s just had it with influencers in public.


Say_Hennething

What does "homo" have to do with this?


grey_hat_uk

Seeing naked men can turn you homo, that's why I always close my eyes at the gloryhole


HeyYouWithTheNose

Bury your head in the pillow so you can't see who's behind you


GeeZus-420

“Suppose the other guy is picturing a girl as well?” “How’s he gonna do that with a dick In his mouth Frank?”


Max_AC_

He might also have someone in his family who was a victim of sexual assault, or even was one himself, and has no patience for people like this.


[deleted]

To be fair, those are solid steel and weighted to be free standing.


Fritzo2162

Exactly. First guy was just hanging out.


i-cant-reeddit

Except breaking the law by being nude in public…but yeah just hanging out, letting em air out


stephangb

doesn't justify fucking knocking him out from behind, specially on the head, could've killed him ffs


[deleted]

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Secret-Plant-1542

Because children seeing a naked body is worst than seeing a violent attack?


[deleted]

In America without a shadow of a doubt.


CitizenPremier

Jesus it's really not a big deal if children see a wang. Do you think children are gonna be traumatized by the Statue of David, too?


Relative_Desk_8718

Depends where it is and how the person is conducting themselves. I don’t condone this but the guy with the sign holy fuck he should not be walking among free people


BusyTurn3871

It's a pity the general public don't have a national get naked day. I'm sure it would take on quickly. 😘😘🤣


keystothemoon

There’s a naked bike ride every year in Philly.


Fritzo2162

He's being healthy. Prevents fungal infections.


wishiwasdead69

This video is quite old, for context he tries to sexually assault one of a department store employees he deserved every bit of that hit


LavishnessLittle6730

tbh deserved Its in a public mall and there is little girls running around aswell And this weirdo is standing there naked


[deleted]

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Scorchfrost

Redditors unironically saying that people should be assaulted or killed for having a psychiatric episode


Kombart

Reddit defends excessive violence in a lot of situations. All these people rightfully condemn police brutality but then turn around and defend people that punish others "that deserve it". Like all the videos where a grown up black man curbstomps some white teenager that used a bad word. Or when a 6.3 dude throws around and fucks up a small women that gave him a slap. Sure all of that is very shitty behaviour, but it doesn't make it right to escalate and punish.


abrillianttwit

Right?! No one deserves that type of physical response.


BreezyBadger420

Just to be clear... you think someone who is standing motionless and unthreateningly, who may have a medical condition or possibly be on medication, that causes them to take actions which would be out of their control... you believe someone in that state DESERVES to have their head cracked open with a steel plate and then left on the floor lifeless, because they were standing motionless without clothes on? All because \*checks notes\* there might be little girls running around? Because if we are going to protect children we should only protect little girls, little boys should definitely not be afforded the same protection. It's also weird that you think nudity is something that needs to be protected against, instead of treating it as a teachable moment. Nudity is real. Children have to get naked to shower and bathe. Teaching them when it's appropriate and not appropriate to be naked is important. This could be a real-life example for children to learn social boundaries and when to report inappropriate behavior and who to report it to. That way if someone does something inappropriate when you aren't around they, children, know who to go to and how to respond.


Kondinator

So if you are in a public place, you can just assault anyone at will? Giving him brain damage does not make him any less naked.


mrmoura

it's called pvp zone


bakersman420

Low level naked with a fire extinguisher gets bodied by high level chad with signpost.


debatels

>Its in a public mall and there is little girls running around aswell So what? A child seeing a naked man for a milisecond before their parent turns them around and changes the direction is not nearly enough reason to murder a man in front of that very exact child.


theoseinagape

See Man Naked = kids irreversibly damaged See Man Murdered = kids are resilient /s


BZenMojo

Explains our movie ratings. Nudity isn't a federal crime, it isn't universally a crime in the US, and it's a misdemeanor at worse where it is a crime. Braining someone with a post though?


[deleted]

You know this site is full of Americans when nudity, with zero sexuality towards it, is considered sexual assault. Dude is having a crisis and is naked because of it. First thing they shout about is "think about the children!".


[deleted]

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Great_husky_63

Yeah he is a weirdo but he was just standing there minding his own business I guess, then the second guy suckerpunched him with a shovel on the cervicals. Try explaining that to he police.


[deleted]

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xannmax

Right? Ignoring everything anyone is saying, standing there weirdly with what could potentially be a weapon. He's asking for something outlandish to happen to him because of his outlandish behavior. Should it have happened? Not that way. Should he have expected retaliation for walking around public nude? Yeah, probably.


BusyTurn3871

Yes you nailed it.


DankHill-

Good way to get an attempted murder charge


redneckrobit

Fire extinguisher was a possible weapon where he could have sprayed people or started hitting them. He came in a little too hot but the guy definitely needed to go down


Lady-Of-Renville-202

I was thinking that, too. As soon as I thought it, the narrator started backing up. He felt it, too.


Crimm444

I'm pretty sure this is one of those cases where someone used a time machine but they didn't know their clothes wouldn't travel with them


napalm51

or the one using a time machine was the bonk guy, while the naked guy would have become a ferocious dictator in 20 years


MrDontTakeMyStapler

All hail napalm51. This is your origin story.


poken_beans

If this comment ran for president, I would vote for it! 🤣


branstark3eyed

So this was how Trump won


Nobodys_here07

Sir when the store said you only needed to have your mask on to enter they also meant the rest of your clothes


Rohrod_

"press square ( □ ) behind an enemy for an instakill attack"


i-cant-reeddit

Lol this gonna be the newest call of duty assassination


Windfall_The_Dutchie

Hold X for silent takedown


MrNice-Guy123

It's America dude... You can do whatever you want


[deleted]

"The land of the free"


Moose_Electrical

home of th-*bonk*


nickfree

Off to horny jail!


[deleted]

Until your rights upset my feelings.


Secret-Breadfruit-18

🤣🤣🤣🤣 yes only then ur rights invalid


Jumpin-Jebus

That was a bit too free...


dudebg

Freebird


B_RizzleMyNizzIe

I have my first amendment rights, Batman.


15367288

He may be crazy, but congrats on the dick, bro.


UpsettyYetti

https://sfist.com/2022/03/29/video-nude-man-at-bloomingdales-violently-assaulted-by-vigilante/ The naked man then chased the "vigilante" with the sign stand the guy hit him with.


BZenMojo

Good.


Mean-Purpose-2179

That clunk at the end…


Coresmc

That's the fire extinguisher hitting the deck


RecycledGum

…dressed only in a mask and a fire extinguisher, Mark prepared to make his statement in front of the “safety is always in style” store. What he forgot, was the helmet.


DueSource2538

This person clearly had mental problems, wow he didn't deserve this! Should have been covered up and taken to seek mental help!


DiscontentedMajority

I mean, drugs are also a distinct possibility here. Regardless of cuase, I'm not getting close to the naked guy carrying a deadly weapon.


minutemilitia

Drugs or not, they still need care. I’ve been working in EMS a long time. You’d be surprised how many emotionally disturbed/ mentally ill/ drug abusers just need a buddy that can give them some help. Sure there were violent ones, but most of them are pretty easy to manage if you aren’t a douche to them.


Scorchfrost

Then don't get close to them? I don't see how that means you have to assault or kill someone?


therealstory28

Clearly the asshole that hit him is looking for any opportunity to get aggressive and assault someone. I would never even think to do that in the same situation. Hopefully he gets his someday.


DiscontentedMajority

I didn't say anything about assaulting him, but I'm not going to be covering him up and getting him help. The police can deal with this dude.


CryoWreck

My man graduated the police academy, fire extinguishers are a deadly weapon. Lmao


firestorm64

He could've hurled it at me across the room with lethal force, that's why I dumped my mag into him.


Ramael3

You serious? Almost _anything_ can be used as a deadly weapon. Do you have immunity from blunt force trauma or something? Or are you just stupid?


destrovel17

Bro the video literally shows that anything can be used as a deadly weapon (as guy #2 demonstrated) yet dudes are still too dense to think a fire extinguisher couldn’t kill


toaste

That’s what sasumata poles are for. Used in China, Japan, India where it’s most often just security vs one person with a knife. Less viable in the US because guns are common, and less viable in the UK or EU because security isn’t gonna immediately outnumber them by 4:1 or more. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Z4z-gzkb6s4


snowballstalker

A naked man, obscuring his face, holding a fire extinguisher should def be treated as a threat.. certainly a lot more effective than tackling him and having to wrestle.


EVOSexyBeast

They’re just civilians, they should create distance and call the police. They have no duty to tackle him. He was not a deadly threat in that moment. The guy’s assault on him with a deadly weapon of his own was not justified.


PM_YOUR_LADY_BOOB

Have you seen what happens to black people acting crazy when cops are called on them?


EVOSexyBeast

Yes the vast, vast majority of the time they get into custody safely.


PM_YOUR_LADY_BOOB

My comment was more of a joke, I could have worded it better. Yes, the best thing to do is to call the cops, and much more often than not, even crazy people are safely arrested.


EVOSexyBeast

Sorry i am known to be slow when it comes to jokes and sarcasm.


PM_YOUR_LADY_BOOB

Nah that's totally my bad, my comment didn't have a hint of sarcasm.


debatels

The fact that he's naked is actually in favor of him being harmless. You clearly see that he has no fire weapon on him.


SimpanLimpan1337

Infact he has an anti-fire weapon on him


BreezyBadger420

A naked man (abnormal but not inherently threatening), standing motionless (textbook non-threat), wearing a mask (which is not abnormal this time of year OR during a pandemic) holding a secured fire extinguisher with the nozzle locked and secured (abnormal but not inherently threatening), tucked SECURELY underneath his arm (textbook non-threat) is no more a threat than any random person who may be concealed carrying in that mall. Is it odd? absolutely! Does it warrant attempted murder by a vigilante? I think not. I don't want untrained people thinking it is ok to take violent actions against other because they "think" it's warranted when there was clearly no immediate danger. It's not like this person was charging towards anyone. Security could have handled this or called first responders if they felt it was outside of their scope. There was no need for vigilante justice. What if someone feels threatened by the color of my skin and "defends" people from me? That's what we're condoning here, vigilantism.


SnooCompliments1686

Guy #2 wanted to look like a kind of hero. He saw somebody filming, he thought: “my time to shine and make the buzzz!”


BZenMojo

Obscuring his face? It's a filter mask, bruh, we're in a covid epidemic and you can't transmit it through ball funk. I'm guessing between the two of you, he's the safest one.


[deleted]

You have no clue whether he had mental problems, that’s how fake stories and conspiracies spread.


[deleted]

[удалено]


highwayman9069

Honestly, I thought he was going to take a shit!


[deleted]

hahahhahah


itx_jammmn

Why wear the mask tho


Dame87

Can’t catch rona from the end of a cock


maxgames_NL

A fire extinguisher is a heavy metal cilinder made to withstand the pressure inside, if he decided to go beserk on people with that he will kill someone. And in the case you think he wont go beserk , he will. A lot of times people have these freezes they go crazy after it, and you can already see that this person is fully able to go crazy. It was very over the top, especially on a floor like that which will cause a lot of trauma when your head lands on it. But there are not many options when someone is heavily under the influence of some sort and has something in their hands which they can cause permanent trauma to you with if they decide to swing it at your head


Rule-5

If that is the real concern of the attacker then I would argue that hitting them like that and running away is not the best option. He will eventually wake up and the situation hasn't resolved and now there is another weapon there. While he's out he needs disarming, restraining safely (for him) and definitely medical attention. *edit: spelling


maxgames_NL

Exactly, just letting him lay there is especially dumb, 1 when he wakes up people might not be focused on him anymore 2. Did you hear his head? These floors cause big trauma and he needs medical attention asap


Max_AC_

Eventually? [He gets right back up and chases the dude who hit him. ](https://youtu.be/d0VV-k8TVhY)


mjslawson

This was my one takeaway from Irréversible.


sloanautomatic

The dummies that are standing all around him would have earned their Darwin award.


barsch07

I know skulls are pretty hard but that was a metal thingy and that other dude swung it with full force. Holy shit that could have easily killed that man


ZRhoREDD

Having worked retail and also food service (seen some things) when a deranged person is unresponsive and just doing the "fifty yard stare" there is a good chance that they are going to go ABSOLUTELY BERSERK at any moment. I don't like violence, but the dude with the broomstick* might have had the right idea. Edit: *thought it was a dust bin on a stick. It was actually a black sign post with a base.


---v---v---v---

That wasn't a broomstick it was a metal sign holder.


academician1

Thought you were going to say, That wasn't a broomstick it was a boomstick.


ZRhoREDD

Ooo, you're right. I thought it was the dustbin side of a retail broom, but you're right, it's a steel sign holder. That's a ~10 lb difference :-/


nico282

There is a huge range of options between waiting for him to snap and killing him with a metal post to the head.


croooooooozer

Yeah just beat the fuck out of mental patients because some snap /s


wolfballs-dot-com

I guess you have never been beat the fuck out of by a mentally ill person. Ride the night train for a couple months and it will happen.


croooooooozer

I am a mentally ill person sadly and I have weird breakdowns, not the violent kind though, like the other 99%. people in my country tend to actually try and help. for some weird reason mental people flip out a lot less here, maybe it's because we don't beat them the fuck up and alienate them for a chance that they have a violent psychosis same vibe as locking up drug users, trying to beat the problem into the ground rather than help the victims will only cause more problems


niamarkusa

don't say mental patients like the guy really needed help. mf seems in perfect shape ad mentality for a [fight](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d0VV-k8TVhY)


[deleted]

Naw dude. This ain’t it.


prude_eskimo

bro according to reddit walking around in public naked means you are fair game to hunt. this website is incredibly blood thristy


Emptypotatoskin

very true .. his breathing ramping up was a clear sign that he locked in on that girl


BuSsYBoI-sTaYpOpPiN

There's always someone crazier around the corner waiting to bash your skull through your occipital lobe.


Tall-Fig-3327

Dick out with a surgical 😷 on. Classic


PM_me_INFP

That escalated


CowWitty8153

#bathsalts


alcoholisthedevil

Sir, this is a Wendys….BONK


662Mane

Bro woke up in my dream and it turned out to be the dream where the guy finally catches up to me.


qualmton

Steps to getting famous. Step one use escalator


jungleshack

Gotta love San Francisco.


[deleted]

Anyone link to the news story of the assault?


Burntlands1

FAFO


chillpill_23

He isn't naked. He got a mask.


Akainordmannen

Wtf


Nolsby

Big ups to the security guard…when he gets fired he may have a future as a camera man.


marcodavidg

Now THIS is what I expect from this subreddit!


HarlanCedeno

"You're not going to get famous doing this!" Well I guess that security guard feels pretty silly now


galaxyeyes47

Holy fuck. I was expecting the guy to shit or something, not be taken out like that.


[deleted]

Now you can take the mentally deranged guy into custody safely. Still need to deal with the violent one though


Extreme-Ad723

Well obviously diplomacy failed


skeptobpotamus

On the other hand, it is unlikely that you will successfully rationalize with a naked dude holding a fire extinguisher.


Knight_A7X

I hope this second dude gets charged


pitmasterbbq82

I mean...sometimes you gotta knock a mother fucker out. Is what it is


slappymcstevenson

What was the naked man going to do with that fire extinguisher? That’s a weapon. Is it not?


scrupulous_oik

100% - the guy who put him to sleep did so swiftly and for other people's safety. Holding a heavy pressurised canister that is potentially full of some noxious liquid is threatening in and of itself... but to just stand there naked too? **Bonk the bloke and get him into a straight jacket then a clinical setting for treatment pronto** - jobs a good'n.


Vindicator2910

He actually got back up and grabbed the object he got knocked down with. Someone posted a link to the YouTube vid so there's a little more to the video than what is here.


epukinsk

Except it didn’t work? Now the guy is on the street running around angry with a steel plate on a pole.


[deleted]

Problem solved.


[deleted]

I mean at most he should've been forcefully escorted out but he did not need the brain damage


[deleted]

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teej360

Damn! That was definitely unexpected. I'm reminded of a not so proud moment in my life that was somewhat similar to this. It was New Year's Eve, and we were having a party. Everyone was wasted, including myself. I couldn't find my boyfriend of two years, and went looking for him, only to find him in our bed with our roommate. They were so engrossed with each other they didn't notice me standing there with my jaw agape staring at them. Finally I snapped out of my disbelieving stupor and called his name. He froze, muttered "oh shit!" and jumped out of bed. I started screaming at him, "how fucking DARE YOU, in _our BED!_ and he started running, buck ass naked down the hallway to _her room_. I was livid, and all I could see was his bare ass booking it down the hallway which made me even more angry that he was running away like a little cowardly bitch, so I knocked him upside the back of his head with my hand. Hard. Really hard, with the heel of my hand making contact in the same place as the guy in the video hit the naked guy. After that, I don't remember much... My friends calmed me down. His sorry ass (and not in the apologetic sense of the word) left while I was in the other room crying. The next evening he called me to say his friend was coming over to get his shit out of my apartment (he stayed with me most nights but wasn't on the lease), and oh, my the way, he spent the night in the hospital because apparently I knocked his retina loose and it detached. He spent new years Eve/morning in the hospital. Inwardly I thought GOOD, asshole! Outwardly I wondered if I was going to get arrested for assault. I'm still not sure why he didn't press charges. I didn't _mean_ to do it, but that's beside the point. As a consolation to those of you who think I'm a horrible bitch, that may be, but he paid it back to me in spades by punching ME in the head a month later when I went to HIS house to pick up my belongings and he strangled me to unconsciousness on his carport floor, and I barely escaped with my life. True story.


edgas_

fast and effective


bagooly

I'd do the same, people like this are hella annoying


Tobi18x

Naked guy is an absolute idiot, just stop doing that, wtf But the second one is not better, wearing clothes but hammering someone's skull with some kind of metal thing


Hameis

Cmon obviously there is a lot more to it than just choosing to do it. This thread is disappointing af, no God damn compassion or understanding.


Horror-Manner-8561

swinging meat in public get's you no where fast !


DominiekV

Bro think he Walter White


Red5nake

This is what needs to be done, if there are no consequences to these people's actions, next time he will just do it at a school.


IWasNotOk

No way you can tell if that was an attention seeker or someone with a serious mental illness who was having an episode. But yeah sure we will just go with mindless violence on a whim like fucking savages because society is a giant piece of cold heartless shit. Tf out of here.


Neighborhoodbunghole

The normal consequence would have been the police intervening. Are you ok?


NheFix

You're talking about the guy who slammed the drugged unarmed man ? You're right ! There should be great consequences to this assault !


Hi_Im_MrMeeseek

Ther should also be consequences for people irresponsibly taking drugs that make them not responsible for their actions. Not everything is black or white.


[deleted]

gotta love reddit being on mentally ill ppl's sides. these ppl need to be put in therapy


Hi_Im_MrMeeseek

For real, wtf even is this


androlyn

Well, he was definitely armed, the big red thing he's holding in his arms, actually demonstrates that.


whotookyyooimu

a fire extinguisher...?


maxgames_NL

A fire extinguisher is a heavy metal cilinder made to withstand the pressure inside, if he decided to go beserk on people with that he will kill someone. And in the case you think he wont go beserk , he will. A lot of times people have these freezes they go crazy after it, and you can already see that this person is fully able to go crazy. It was very over the top, especially on a floor like that which will cause a lot of trauma when your head lands on it. But there are not many options when someone is heavily under the influence of some sort and has something in their hands which they can cause permanent trauma to you with if they decide to swing it at your head


Fire1eater

Yeaa thats definitely attempt murder


ExplorerCommercial49

Mr Bean