T O P

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Darketroy

too real bro, i been looking for half a year now šŸ˜­


unstable_cat1803

worst part is, half a year is not even that bad šŸ˜­


Small-Wallaby3058

Fr me going on strong for 2 years. All I get is sales šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­ I hate dealing with ppl too


hedgethehedgehedge

I live to apply to jobs. I love it. I enjoy the feeling of waiting to hear back from hiring managers and recruiters. Getting rejected from positions that I may have felt were beneath me is a humbling experience and I am growing from it. Life has never been better.


superbassboom

i love the feeling when they contact you a year and a half later asking if youā€™re still interested, and youā€™re still desperate for work so you say yes and they reply ā€œGot it, Iā€™ll update that on our records, thanks.ā€


johnyjameson

Donā€™t lose faith. After graduating over a decade ago, I put all my hopes in this flashy recruiter that was bragging heā€™ll get me on a graduate scheme with PWC. All I got from his company were referrals for shitty recruitment roles, which I turned down. A couple of years later he had the audacity to call and say heā€™s dropping me because he canā€™t find a role to match my experience, that itā€™s a very demanding market and that people were doing MBAs etc. I cut him short and he had a slight hiccup when I told him I got a job on my own, at a tech startup that paid twice what he was initially bragging about in the graduate scheme roles. He still follows me on LinkedIn to this day.


TurboBoxMuncher

You also dodged a huge bullet cause PWC is a beige gulag for bean counters and red tape fetishists


johnyjameson

Yeah I had the misfortune of meeting a few of those PWC consultant types. Absolute waste of money and time, they brought no value to any project or initiative.


SuitableSympathy2614

ā€œUnfortunately, on this occasionā€¦ā€ *fuck yeah just like that*


Pixielix

Did you make sure to put that on your LinkedIn, dude?


StartupideasDowntown

Adding to the love list is saving and not buying stuff anymore, learning to think about money for any step of the day, living without vehicles and walking everywhere really gives a zest for life. Also worrying about finances daily which has given a more present approach to life and really starting to be open to Anything which has led me at least to believe there is a life outside a dignifying career- a humbling life changing experience- adding to this the amount of empathy I now feel for unemployed people šŸ™ƒ It is a blissful experience indeed.


TheArstaInventor

Bro you made me laugh lmaoo I love it


Legitimate-Source-61

Apply to be the US President. You miss 100% of every shot you don't take. šŸ’Ŗ


SoldierBoi69

would it be offensive to ask what I could do differently so I donā€™t end up like you? :(


The_Nonce-ler

Get involved in societies, either in a technical (if the society is that type) or leadership role or both. Use those skills to apply to internships, and just never neglect your CV basically, from day 1. Get the 2:1 but skills and internships are #1.


-_Pendragon_-

Join up and do 4 years minimum service in the military. Instantly set yourself apart


GevanS__

love the feeling of getting to the final stage and sinking 20 hours into the interview process just to get rejected with no feedback


Inevitable_Donut_458

I have been employed for about 10 years, but it was always the "I'm a hard working and determined individual, with a proven track record for **insert bullshit here**" that really made my eyes rolls, I felt so dirty after typing it for some strange unknown reason. Maybe because I'm not hard working, I'm actually lazy, which was what my last cv was based on, I wrote the complete opposite of what I thought they wanted to hear, I was at the end of my tether and desperate for money. I typed out a cv based on actual truth. "I'm gonna be honest, I'm a lazy person, not in the sense that I wouldn't shower for days or eat from dirty plates like a 1st year uni student, but more in the sense that if you pass me a stack of work, I'm going to find the quickest and most effective way to complete it, because, I get bored easily. I like taking breaks and would much prefer to be working in a forest than a humid office, stuffed into some slim fit suit, looking like a human pork sausage, but I'll work hard, just so I can catch an extra break when my works done" It went on like that, got an interview and a job offer šŸ¤·. My wife calls me the greatest salesman alive. I just call it adulterated honesty.


I_AmA_Zebra

Donā€™t wait, chase them proactively. Not like you have much else to do (besides wait) and this is the most direct way you can get a reply


cryptbandit

You hear back? Crazy.


[deleted]

The act in itself is a job All jokes aside, keep looking, good luck


Mediocre_Ad_1116

donā€™t be afraid to flower up your CV guys!! and if you get an interview the most important thing is to be confident and smile


Imlostandconfused

And look up interview questions if it's a large company! People post questions they were asked, and it's so helpful. I've only used this tip for supermarket and barista jobs, but professional job interview questions are posted, too. Never aced interviews like that before. And cover letters! I've never not been invited for an interview when I included a good cover letter. And you can get AI to write a decent template so it's not even that hard- you just edit to make it sound more personal and less robotic. Edit: And FAKE your personality so hard. I'm introverted and a bit moody in real life, but I'm somehow charming, funny, and likeable af in interviews. Hone those acting skills, guys! And talk in your nicest voice. The sad reality is that people DO discriminate if you have a 'working class' or heavily regional accent. I've been complimented on my voice and immediately offered a job. I'm not even 'posh', just went to very middle-class schools, so I picked up the accent subconsciously. It's a damn shame that we have to consider all this, but it's the reality of things. I'm trying to teach my 17 year old sister how to get her first job, but she talks like a roadman most of the time, doesn't make eye contact, and has been rejected after every interview. šŸ™ƒ


2020visionsloth

thats great advice I cant believe Iā€™ve never thought to google interview questions before, thank you:)


throwawaylifeee1

You can also try asking chatgpt to make up some questions for you


Mediocre_Ad_1116

iā€™m exactly like you. i have to do things like use my hands, speak louder, smile A LOT in interviews. things i never do IRL


Imlostandconfused

Ayyy twins. It's funny how we can act our asses off when we need to. I also find it funny when managers slowly realise I'm actually very reserved (unless I'm with my closest family and friends- I'm completely different). I think they feel a bit tricked, but it's all a game and the world's stage, so what can you do šŸ˜…


Mediocre_Ad_1116

haha as long as you get the job done. they canā€™t fire your for your personality


Imlostandconfused

Exactly my thoughts! Mask mandates were somewhat of a blessing, though, because I did get reprimanded often in past jobs about looking miserable (hard not to be in a busy, short staffed cafe) or annoyed. But managers couldn't accuse me of having miserable or angry eyes šŸ¤£


johnyjameson

Your sister needs to understand that the road man talk and clothes will cost her a fortune in the long run.


Imlostandconfused

We've tried so hard to get through to her tbh. I even went to her parents' meetings at school (she failed all her GCSEs except 1, I got the third best results in my entire year) because my mum was hoping I could motivate her better than she could. Nothing. I messaged her weekly, asking if she'd been revising. I offered to help. You get nothing back from her. She's always been like this tbh. Parents had her hearing testing when she was 3. Turns out she was just ignoring them šŸ˜­


pops789765

I donā€™t want to be served by someone I canā€™t understand in a McDonaldā€™s let alone deal with one in a professional setting. I hope your sister gets over her roadman-accent please.


Imlostandconfused

This is exactly my point! I've said this to her. None of us speak like this in the family. We're either West Country with a bit of an accent or none or German, so this accent is purely from her friends and the media. Honestly, we're all despairing over her lmao. I try to tell her and she's like 'Bruh, I cannot change how I talk' šŸ˜­ she's only talked like this for a couple years so I think she bloody can


Gauntlets28

And research the company, the projects it currently has going on (most decently sized firms will have a section for press releases on their website, which is an absolute goldmine). Also, if you know the name of the interviewers, it might be worth reading up on them as well to know what their background is. Think that's weird? It's not. They will be doing the exact same thing to you, so not returning the interest puts you at a disadvantage.


Imlostandconfused

Yes, great tips I didn't consider! They almost always ask what you know about their company/project/history and interviewers are visibly impressed when you can tell them. One thing I do is always deactivate my non-anon personal social media pages when I'm job searching. I don't have anything incriminating on them, but I'd rather the only things that come up are my contributions to my university blog, other academic work and LinkedIn. I have a rare surname so I'm easy to find and people discriminate by even looks and interests because humans are inherently biased. Those amazing travel pics might impress some interviewers, but offers might be jealous and hold it against you. This is especially important if you use Twitter or anything to make political statements.


PringleFlipper

Iā€™m an expat with a (now subtle) regional/working class accent and work in senior leadership roles. Every now and then I come across a man RP-speaking Brit socially who picks up on it and tries to make a weird point about it. It always backfires because my accent is so slight and everyone else in the conversation is just confused. but yes this is very real!


I_AmA_Zebra

Yeah only thing not to flower-up is the most recent role, Uni, or whoever your 2 references will come from Besides that theyā€™ll just grill you on how you answer questions of your alleged ā€œexperienceā€ and ā€œprojectsā€


AdPrior1417

An ontervoewer becomes much, much easier when you take the stand point "Hold tf up a minute - I'm also interviewing THEM, too!" When you realise this and ask a lot of questions, not even technical or job specific questions to hint st the research youve done, the interview becomes less robotic, more natural, and conveys genuine interest Or, interest that appears genuine and less vested


[deleted]

My favourite part of doing a difficult degree at a ā€˜prestigious Russell Group universityā€™ was coming out with Ā£50,000 debt only being eligible for jobs paying less than Ā£2,000 a month.


paradox501

Welcome to the matrix


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


AggressiveBug8071

Go to a small country a violate their natural resources.


TurnoverInside2067

Unless you've done something incredibly stupid, it's not real debt and you don't need to worry about it. Which you should have realised if you're making less than 2k a month, as you won't be paying anything - bank loans don't work that way!


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


[deleted]

Biology


paradisesadness

Uhm well šŸ’€ shouldā€™ve done business


[deleted]

True, deep down I long to be a depressed banker at JP Morgan.


paradox501

Wanker banker, whereā€™d you find that chancer? wanker banker, whereā€™d you get those eyes?


Longjumping_Bee1001

Companies don't care about business degrees it just translates to any business


Special-Art-8628

If any degree is worth going to it is stem subjects. Business is not worth going to uni for. The only thing good with a business degree is making connections whilst you're in uni.


_trashpuppy

Even STEM (definitely science + technology) is facing an uphill battle too in the current market. Bio / chem grads almost require a masters to be competitive. CS was lauded as one of the best degrees for a few years, and now the market is completely oversaturated with people who self-taught let alone the thousands of graduates. I'd say the only degrees that anyone can say are 100% worth it are medicine, dentistry and vet med. Then again, you have to deal with the awful working conditions and pay. Anything else is going to have an element of uncertainty unless you have connections.


[deleted]

been looking for 2 years - there is a booming prostitution area close to where I live each day I consider if I should consider it as a career


Plappeye

kensington in liverpool ?


Silver_Switch_3109

His motherā€™s house.


Ujunko

Viva street is ur best friend


Statement_Wrong

By any chance did you study English literature at Kingston university


Ujunko

Yes I did šŸ˜±


Bright-Bumblebee-263

Such a good referrence. credit where credits due haha


Kindly-Sea-6945

"If you think you can graduate from this school without kissing my c***, heh heh heh heh, you are dead wrong."


rabando_jadrik

Great reference


PracticalEffect6105

Not wanting to minimise the struggle for work right now (as the market is definitely in the employers favour right now) - but, as someone who regularly selects and interviews candidates, there are a few things I would recommend to people looking at getting into the workplace out of Uni, regardless of what career you are looking to break into. 1) Sign up to some free/cheap courses - particularly in the field of computer science/data/excel/salesforce Most careers out there are going to require some comfort in low level data work, it will look good on your CV to show you have put some work in to get to know the most common systems in preparation. You may already know some of the systems, which will make the courses really easy, but it will stand out on your CV. I would rather hire someone who is going to be able to learn the ropes that bit quicker - and someone who has done that off their own back is ticking a lot of boxes 2) Ensure your CV is not a story, but an illustration of your skills I've read thousands of CV's over the years that are chronology of jobs/autobiography. Big walls of text. They are not useful at all. Make your recounting of former employment/volunteering/studies/whatever relevant to the field you are hoping to break into. Highlight the skills you needed to use - share short examples and successes and anywhere where you can illustrate your success with numbers is great. It can be as simple as: *Volunteer work:* ***Under 11's netball coach*** ***Key responsibilities:*** *Health and safety, safeguarding, organisation and session management, group engagement, performance reviews and one-to-one communication* ***Highlights and successes****: - Increased session attendance by 20% through active engagement with primary caregivers* *- Developed coaching plans to improve individual and team performance, resulting in the highest league finish since 2011* I know what netball coaching is, I don't need chapter and verse - I just want to know what it is about your theoretical past as a netball coach for under 11's that is relevant and transferable. I know it comes across as fluff, but it shows that you are engaging with the kabuki that is the job application process. This may seem like a no-brainer to everyone here, but trust me, most people don't bother to do this or don't do it very well, and the ones who do get hired faster. and lastly 3) Honestly, my interview experiences with new graduates isn't amazing. Practice eye contact, learn to limit the filler words (like, erm, um, literally), know your CV inside out - its easy to identify someone who is being deceptive/exaggerating as what they are saying doesn't match up to their cover letter and CV (which your interviewer will often have right in front of them). Be positive, polite, dress up smartly and modestly - even if its an interview over zoom. Last hiring round I interviewed a graduate over zoom who was in a hoodie and took a puff of their vape during the interview. Good CV, terrible interview. No thanks, next please. Research the most common interview questions asked by the employer or industry and create generalised answers to them beforehand that are applicable to variations of the core question. I personally don't mind if you bring your own notes along to an interview, in fact, I would love it if more people brought a pen and paper and *interviewed the employer*. It shows some assertiveness and makes it seem like you are a choser, not a beggar. Don't be afraid to talk yourself up and back yourself - I know British culture forces a level of self-depreciation, but the interviewer wants to know why you are the best person for this job, not why you are average! I know they all seem basic, but most applicants don't do them!


saabiiii

I did everything you said and still no response


PracticalEffect6105

Itā€™s not a guaranteed formula unfortunately- but youā€™re in a much better position for doing them than not doing them, I promise you that. It might not feel like it, but youā€™ll get there. Do you have someone you trust/respect who could help you practice and go through your CV? Iā€™d happily review your CV for you if you donā€™t! Last time I interviewed we had 300+ applicants. We are a tech scaleup, and interviewing is extra work on top of my usual, very broad responsibilities . I donā€™t have time to deeply review 300-400 applications in thorough detail unfortunately. Our screening process removed about 90% of applicants and allowed me to work through 30 names - to try and get down to 8 people to interview.Ā  A poorly written CV, or one which doesnā€™t obviously outline experience and competency, was screened out pretty much immediately.Ā  I know it doesnā€™t seem fair - we just simply donā€™t have time to deal with that volume of applicants for the roles we are advertising!


AlivePickleWo

literally


Parsonsman

Put a profile on Adultwork.


AxiosXiphos

Was looking for this. If they are willing to suck dick to get work... are they also willing to suck dick **as** work?


Over_Caffeinated_One

You need at least 80 years of experience in the field, with a BSc, MSc, PhD, Post Doctorate research, a Nobel prize for this entry-level position that is unpaid


shmygu

Keep your head up, it's tough out there but don't lose hope!


the_midget123

I'm sorry to sound jammy, I found mine on indeed at midnight, sent my application the next day, did two interviews and started the week after my last lecture, today is my last exam and I have a day off for it. I've been working for 3 weeks. The trick is to avoid big companies or firms is you are not a 1st level student. My company is a small regional company. I never got past the 1st part of the big companies. Find a regional or local company and act keen.


No-Unit6672

I think thereā€™s a lot to be said for getting in there early too, itā€™s pretty hard sifting through cvā€™s so if yours is one of the first to come in youā€™re guaranteed to get looked at at least


Or4ngut4n

Mine, iā€™m afraid


FeiRoze

What are you afraid of? Sounds pretty pleasant.


whoyoucallingshawty

A good time even!


The_Health_Police

A job? Donā€™t threaten me with a good time!


TheMysteriousAM

If youā€™re coming from uni now I would highly suggest that you need an internship - these very often lead onto jobs and are paid during your summers. If you havenā€™t got an internship or any work experience than good luck lol


y45h_9

any suggestions on how to find them?


TheMysteriousAM

They are often posted all over job boards in September-January. Alternatively you can also look at the top 100 graduate employers websites during this time as I believe all of them offer internships. There are typically more places than grad schemes and it will make it much easier to get onto a grad scheme at the same company as you skip a majority of the application process. If you donā€™t get one itā€™s not the end of the world but you will be fighting an uphill battle to get a grad scheme - I had to do a year in a standard call centre job in order to get one whereas 80% of my colleagues on the scheme did an internship at the company. Grad schemes are the key to early career success, they give you basically 3-5 different job roles within a 2 year period so your experience is significantly broader than those doing standard jobs. On top of that your salary very quickly increases at the end of the grad scheme (doubling within 3 years typically)


healingjoy

During year 2 apply during 1st term so September-December,Ā Ā 


y45h_9

any suggestions on how to find them?


Botticellis-Bard

When I was in primary, everyone used to bang on about a strip club behind the local Tesco, so maybe try there. I hear theyā€™ve a very flexible employer.


Centorior

One of the problems here relates to the assumption of what you need to suck. On a more serious note, how many jobs have you applied for, what industry are you trying to get into, and which part of the country are you in? What is your strategy to get interviews(, and being successful in them)?


nordiclands

i think itā€™s not related to industry. iā€™ve seen a lot of posts talking about this and experienced it myself, and all i was applying for was any kind of part time job in any sector. no response or rejection from literally all of them, and there werenā€™t even that many to begin with. even if you change your strategy, there is still nothing.


RagingMassif

I don't want a BJ but if anyone here wants to send me their CV I will take a look. I've hired hundreds of staff over the last thirty years and feel I have a manager's eye...


mj561256

Mine


throwawaylifeee1

Alright cool how much do you pay


mj561256

25p per time


AlivePickleWo

cheap labour šŸ’€


Defiant-Snow8782

So that's approximately 1 minute 20 seconds per time at NLW. Or do you play reduced minimum wage to under 23s too?


Souseisekigun

Oh this is an unpaid internslut positionĀ 


Used-Fennel-7733

Nono this is an unpaid internship


Ronweasley3117

OP Username checks out šŸ˜­


Tricky_Adeptness5659

ā€˜Weā€™ll keep you on fileā€™. Which one, the one that no one ever EVER reads again?


Rhymes_with_cheese

Whenever I get a stack of CVs, I split them into two piles and throw one pile in the bin without even looking... ... I don't want to hire unlucky people.


Tricky_Adeptness5659

Yep that logic sounds about right šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­


Persia102

I had an interview at the start of my career and was 'kept on file'. 3 months later they rang me and offered me the job as another vacancy had opened up. This was in 1995, so maybe things have changed a bit since then?


Tricky_Adeptness5659

They said that to me as well so hopefully they havenā€™t changed that much! šŸ¤žšŸ¼


Persia102

I have everything crossed for you! šŸ¤žšŸ»Ā 


Tricky_Adeptness5659

Thank you!!!


Federal_Let_4271

Literally impossible. If it helps I did this student ambassador program (https://form.typeform.com/to/tWvA2oEs?utm_source=ambassadors&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=HYB-GAIGOU) for this student housing platform called hybr thatā€™s good if youā€™re looking to add to your cv. Also lots of good events for networking and thereā€™s lots of paid opportunities. The CEO made Forbes 30 under 30 for tech this year which is pretty cool. Good luck in the job search !!!


NaiveBranch1429

My friend did this and i ended up using hybr for finding my accom bc of them. Was great


lmiartegtra

This comment section is actually making me want to commit. If you can't get a job I'd suggest volunteering just so you're not sat around doing nothing. And if you're already not sat around doing nothing keep it up, a hobby/working out does actually make you more employable. But other than that keep your head high and keep applying. And also definitely look at your CV. Comb that shit, look at everything and anything that could be wrong with it. I know that when I looked at my CV after I left my last job to go back to uni I was absolutely dumbfounded at how I even got an interview for shift work in a TK max warehouse.


xsorr

Is the job industry that bad? For grads? Or people still in uni?


ChumChums2400

Bad is definitely an understatement - even people with experience, whether that is 2 years or 20 aren't going through doors as easy as you think across many industries


nordiclands

applied to pretty much every available part time job as a student in my city and area. rejected or ignored, all of them. had my cv revised by an advisor and the whole deal, still nothing. iā€™m volunteering now, lol


Pazaac

Honestly, unless you are in some very specific tech fields your stuffed. Jobs that genuinely require higher education are in short supply and tend to be a dead man's shoes situation where it matters more about who you know than anything else. Then you have the jobs that need experience where almost every job hates the thought of training someone from jr, there can be a lot of these positions but good luck getting one without the experience, most jr. positions are just looking to rip off non-jr. people with impostor syndrome so they have no interest in fresh uni students. And Finally you have every other job that you are now competing with every other person out there for and every year there is another group of people to compete with. Uni is mostly an expensive excuse to spend a few year trying to get smarter for the sake of it, unless you picked a practical medical field its not generating you a job.


FeiRoze

I know a man, calls himself The Orgazoid.


GevanS__

he hired a mate of mine as a handyman


diabl0ESEABANNED

A useful tip I learned when job hunting is to include keywords from the job advert in your CV and/or cover letter. You may have everything they want but if their first impression doesn't include the specific key areas they want then your CV goes to the bin pile. I've heard from multiple recruiters that companies tend to have the CVs sorted through some in-house algorithm/HR for relevance, this includes these keywords. When I tried this tailored method my responses increased 2-3 fold.


belisarius93

I had to wait tables for a little while after uni before I got a near minimum wage job as a lab tech. Years later I'm earning good money; It's rough out there, but things do get better, I promise you.


healingjoy

Just lie honestly , during interviews you need to exaggerate and make stuff up , lying on cv is risky though


zq6

Teaching gets a bad rep, but it pays the bills, has a good pension, allows you to build transferable skills and affords a lot of time off. Some private schools offer accommodation as part of the deal, and since they're private they will also consider unqualified teachers. If you have a STEM degree and even passable people skills you'd have a good chance at a maths/science role. And if a school is recruiting _in June_ then they are fuckin desperate lol.


BritishTeapot

If you need a job (as in, anything that gets you into employment) then the health and social sector always need people as HCAs/care assistants/support workers. For retail and care in particular you may need to take your degree off your CV - employers can get put off as they assume you're only there for a short period until something better comes along (they don't need to know that's what you'll be doing) Long gone are the days of being able to go straight into a career without exceptional factors (i.e., connections, internships etc.). I graduated in 2016 and majority of us ended up in minimum wage employment after uni.


Delicious_Cattle3380

If you live in a city you can absolutely get one , keep going


stvvrover

A dick to suck or a job? ā€¦edited as I initially put duck šŸ˜‚


SkywalkerFinancial

You leave the duck alone, perve.


Ashthedestructor_95

I have been trying to get part time jobs for the past 9 months. I have a heart condition that prevents me from doing physical jobs. In 2 months my rent will run out. Never been happier. As an international student i have to concede that i made a huge mistake and itā€™s entirely my fault. I feel ya. Peace


trashmemes22

Donā€™t lose hope people. It took me a year after my masters to get one but Iā€™m now in a much better position. Work a shitty job to support yourself, try and do something a bit different if you can to bring in transferable skills yada yada. Avoid sales and recruitment jobs like the plague and keep grinding


Firm-Excitement9340

šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚tell me when u find out


Affectionate-Wing704

What kind of job are u looking for? A blow...jobĀ 


Cautious_Grape_1071

One job genuinely told me to leave them 7 months to get back to me?? 7 months? By then Iā€™ll be homeless broskišŸ’€(disclaimer it was VUE cinemas)šŸ’€


Plasma_Blitz

Even part time work is an absolute pain in the arse to get, seems like for every vacancy that exists, 100 people apply for it.


TheGhostOfCamus

Just put fake stuff on your CV honestly and lie to the point that you can defend it. Thatā€™s how I got my part time job and now a relatively good job thatā€™s related to my career and education. Of course this only works for entry level jobs. But I am pretty sure people lie for high end jobs as well.


NEK0SAM

I spent almost my whole uni life so far looking (2nd year) Whatā€™s stupid is when I said to uni about my concerns with work, money and finances they said ā€˜get rid of your carā€™. Without that car I canā€™t get a job because most places in some uni cities outright wonā€™t give jobs to students nor even consider them, experienced or not. Plus Iā€™m a mature student over 25 so itā€™s cheaper for them to higher a new 18 year old even if they did accept students. (Yes I have been rejected from a job due to ā€˜costing too much employment moneyā€™)


Embarrassed_Yam146

Recruiter here and to answer your question you need to suck your own dick sometimes. I've had a glass of wine so I'm going to be honest. Noone gives a shit about what you did in uni degrees are literally the worst investment going (they keep making more of them and they keep going up in price). If you need one and have one don't please don't try and flex about where you went we really really don't care it's a tick box it's like you telling us you can read. Most of the jobs that have degree requirements are simply because noone can be fucked changing the JD template and have been using the same one since the Blair years. When I say suck your own dick here are some things you can try 1/Don't pad your CV own the fact you have no experience don't try and justify it 2/Make us laugh. Do a funny in a cover letter show some personality (we can tell who is using AI as it means the cover letters are even more dull than they normally are) I once shortlisted a guy who told me he had 5 years experience in the distribution of major motion pictures (he worked in Blockbuster) he was pretty funny in person too so he got the job. 3/If you get an interview give us some personality be memorable don't be a robot. I'm going assume I'm going to have to spend a lot of time with you don't make me think it's going to be boring. 4/Find someone senior who works where you want to work and reach out and ask for 15 mins. You would be surprised how willing people are to do this.


ProblemCurrent2654

Listen i was here not too long ago. Its painful but just remember it really isnā€™t your fault. Keep fighting.


GuaranteePrevious976

Did you do an internship / placement or year in industry? If you didn't wtf were you doing at uni? It wasn't trying to get a job. Every large company's website has an early careers section. literally google "UK summer placements" [https://www.pwc.co.uk/careers/early-careers/our-programmes/summer-internship.html](https://www.pwc.co.uk/careers/early-careers/our-programmes/summer-internship.html) [https://www.gradcracker.com/search/all-disciplines/engineering-work-placements-internships](https://www.gradcracker.com/search/all-disciplines/engineering-work-placements-internships) [https://earlycareers.jcb.com/undergraduates](https://earlycareers.jcb.com/undergraduates) [https://careers.rolls-royce.com/united-kingdom/students-and-graduates/graduates-and-interns](https://careers.rolls-royce.com/united-kingdom/students-and-graduates/graduates-and-interns) [https://www.brightnetwork.co.uk/internships/](https://www.brightnetwork.co.uk/internships/)


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


SokkaHaikuBot

^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^Similar-Pangolin9203: *Just lie on your CV,* *I got a uni degree* *That way without the debt* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.


erentheplatypus

All I can say is itā€™s a numbers game


God_Lover77

Go for on campus jobs.


TheSexyGrape

šŸŒš


FirmAd8811

Literally in the same boat right now! So frustrating ugh


Isgortio

I've been working for the last 12 years, and when I applied for retail jobs whilst at uni recently I got rejected every single time. I already have 2 jobs but one I really don't like, and the other I can only take shifts when I don't have class at all that day. But no one wants to free me from the crappy care job. PS - care jobs are always hiring because they are often poorly run and people leave quite often, so they're quite good to apply for.


Independent_Pay1692

u/maths-is-cool is the nephew of the HEAD ;) of Boeing


HairyAndBear

The entry level market is the most competitive market, its flooded with graduates, teenagers, and people who just work random jobs. It is literally horrible now, gl


DroneNumber1836382

Mine! Or that guy over there.


PaintSniffer1

apply to SME companies and ur golden


VampireSlut04

Networking - not the slutty kind but flirting helps - reach out to employers, reach out to CEOs, get yourself meetings with them. There's only so much you can learn about a person over a curriculum vitae. I'm not sure how effective LinkedIn is.


Cute_External1127

Got rejected for a 20 hour a week job at nike...


yellowredpink

I kinda hate getting an interviewĀ 


HarveyNash95

"it's not what you know, it's who you blow"


DifficultAmoeba698

Tbh it's usually more than one than one dick, more likely a series of dicks to be fair. And even that might not work. The UK job market is dogshit right now


Rye4uya

I was eating doritos when I saw this and laughed my saliva out.


Lolcatz52

Just get into construction, jobs everywhere


crazydev007

youll love working on this cool site called viva street


[deleted]

HAHAHAH SO REAL LMAO


Noli_777

Rishi Sunakā€™s


Usagi-chann

Serial applications tbh keep at it hopefully somewhere will hire you šŸ˜­


hmahood

Jonny sins would be a good start probably


thevampirecrow

i read ā€˜jonny simsā€™ and got jumpscared with tma


Panda-obsession

mine


thevampirecrow

craft


Formal-Cucumber-1138

Loloool. Once you know let me know too Dm me


Sh-tHouseBurnley

When I was struggling to get a job in uni I walked into a place and asked about an advertisement. I wasnā€™t even qualified for that job but they found a different job for me because they liked my honesty (about not being qualified) and my forwardness to ask about it. Obviously I was pretty fortunate but it was literally a 100% success rate for me, so if you havenā€™t been trying that Iā€™d say give it a go.


Electronic-Article39

I have been unemployed for 8 months and found a job today after sending 100 of applications and not even getting reje tions replies and no interviews. Had similar experiences during coved -14 months unemployment. Jobs in UK since coved are like busses you don't get one for ages and then 3 turn up


[deleted]

You're a chick, right?


Legitimate-Ad7273

Depends on your career choice I guess. There seem to be jobs everywhere right now. If you're looking for advice and want to share more info I'm sure people will help.Ā 


Individual_Debt3789

If it makes you feel better I have gone through the cycle I have a learning difficulty called dyspraxia which I think has caused me to lose jobs due to concentration drop in some aspects but also potentially discriminating me for having it. Now I also struggle to interview well anyway so that's also annoying the best person doesn't necessarily get the job it's the person who can interview well that does. My 20s was a waste I had misdiagnosed Crohn's disease at 22 which led to me having major surgery 4 years later at 26. I spent most of my 20s being unemployed but also even when a job was going well I was made redundant. Finally at 29 I got a job as a teaching assistant not in what I qualified for which was a 1st class class degree in accounting and finance. The pay is rubbish but things turned around for me after that I turned 30 and met my girlfriend just before Lockdown two years later I left my mum's house and got a mortgage on a nice 2 bedroom flat with my girlfriend. Almost 2 years later now at 34 things are going well still a TA looking to move on and still shit at interviews šŸ˜‚ The point is yes Job seeking is shit but you need to keep pushing because once you get that door open things can start to change for the better so don't lose hope. P.S Guys if you are that desperate to get your dick sucked hire a sex worker or if it's illegal where you are from go somewhere it's legal. In an ideal world dicks don't get their dick sucked.


BarryScott2019

The host rock looks like Phyllite, great find.


runtman

Mine


thevampirecrow

craft


papijua1

blackmail pedos.


[deleted]

Mistakes were made by posting this lmao


thevampirecrow

WHAT are people DMing you šŸ˜­ šŸ’€


rockleeneo

You should of done apprenticeship, its the only way you get work experience while studying and a possible job in the same place :/ university with a job on the side can be 50/50 if you donā€™t have contacts and something to show to future jobs


_king_bong_

Come do a trial shift at my pub, if you're good, you're in, unfortunately I can't pay more than Ā£13/hour as apparently hospitality is not a viable "career" in the UK


TheGhostOfCamus

The edit shows how fucking desperate everyone has gotten. What shambles!


[deleted]

DM sent


H734

LOOOL šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­


realanxietycrossing

Out of curiosity, which industry are you looking for a job in?


okskipper

Which field are you applying in?


phukmi69

Apply then go in store and tell them. Boosts your chances and just talk to the manager and should get the job if itā€™s retail or something


Temp-Tackle

When I was an admin manager, I took on a young lady fresh out of Uni who had a 2:1 and had worked as a waitress throughout. It was Children's Services, so fast-paced and a bit nutty. I figured her 2:1 showed she could handle deadlines, and waitressing meant she'd be good with chaos. She was floored when I rang her to offer the role. You just need a hiring manager with vision, basically.


Beard-a-geddon

I graduated around a decade ago and the average time needed to get a graduate job was around 6 months, and I got a job bang on 6 months later (awful 6 months). I can only imagine it's worse now. Only suggestion I can make is to try and take on something part-time just to keep you occupied, whilst you apply for grad roles. Doing nothing for 6 months ruined me!


TryharderPls

Iā€™m a project manager and been out of work a year and a half and still havenā€™t got a role in project management the only reason I have a job now is because I got referred to be a call centre agent which is a 30k pay cut the job market fucking sucks full of people that either ghost you on final stages or say ā€œyouā€™re over qualifiedā€


Revolutionary_Owl880

If theyā€™re DM-ing you it better include the job offer too smh


Browny-x

The crusty foreigners. Feel the value drain away from your soul like the rest ,value doesnā€™t return even with standards when it comes to hoes


Browny-x

Who took the vax ? Did it affect you ?


Critical_Chamber

Hi, Im sorry itā€™s so tough out there. I donā€™t know what your degree is or what career you are going for. But advice I can think of is: -go to conferences of the companies you want to work for might be, speak to them, find out what they are looking for -offer to work for free for experience, could be anywhere -network with friends/parents/whoever to get experience -read books like ā€œhow to win friends & influence peopleā€ and charisma on command to improve people skills -aim high, in terms of find people in roles that you want to be in 10-20 years time and look at their previous roles. What was their first steps? -do jobs like cold calling/door to door - that will really build up your work ethics and stamina -what extra courses can you do to support you, learn how to use excel/Salesforce etc is good advice -donā€™t just send over 200 CVs. Go talk to businesses, companies and people.


RSENGG

Trick is to train in a shortage or necessary industry - generally speaking the longer it takes to train for the role the better the job security, although also the stress - nurses, police officers, teachers, etc. For immediate jobs, bar work is my go-to.


Independent_Smile_20

Mine


SaltGypsy

If anyone wants to be an apprentice scaffolder I could do with getting my dick sucked.


Opening_Ear_3367

Boomers dont want to hire Zoomers


angutyus

I know people graduated with 1st from ā€œtop-tierā€ universities in their field - then even got a phd, and unfortunately, still couldnt find a job. Be realistic about your expectations, if you aim high- make sure that you make the effort. To land a job, you will need a bunch of skill set and if you dont have it yet, you shall try to obtain those. Do not focus on the negative bits that you can not change- like bias against your name, your uni, your race and even luckā€¦ And I am not sure if people are aware of the average income of a person in the UK, when they do not like a salary around 2000. People with years of experience sometimes barely earn 2500-3000 a month.


Sleekit2

I can feel from 4 months i have applied for nearly 190 jobes that are just assistant, CSA retail but no one is going to hire me .. am a master study student soon will graduate


throwawaygoof9

You signed up for a couple of years long school course that cost you 50k+ thatā€™s put you behind everyone else in terms of real world work experience because a bunch of teachers that earn 30k a year and hate their lives told you itā€™s the only way to get ahead? Unless youā€™re specifically applying for a post you studied for nobodyā€™s going to really care that you went to uni to study philosophy. Lower your expectations. Youā€™re entering the job market later and with less experience than that kid that left school early to get a job on the building site. And youā€™re probably about to earn less than him for most of your career. Who am I going to pick? The 23 year old with 5 years experience in life, or the 25 year old with no experience who only left school last week?


mindlessenthusiast

Where are you based?


Major_Astronomer_535

Yup, welcome to the world, graduated recently and it's hard as fuck to find anything.


MinaeVain

If you haven't already, register your CV on CV library. A lot of recruiters use that site where they may not even have a publicly posted job listing. After a year of unemployment during covid one afternoon I got a random call about a potential job because they found my CV on that site and I've been working for them for over 3 years now.