I imagine most of us get our feeebee as babies, theres a reason you hear things like "babies are surprisingly resistant!" From people who've dropped kids straight on their soft spots.....
Definitely! I fell out of a window as a baby onto a row of upturned bricks (decorative garden barrier). Fortunately, the adjustable screen that I popped out of the window while waving goodbye to my aunt served as a barrier. That was my one. A cousin of mine tumbled down a straight run of basement stairs when he was also about a year old and turned out to be incredibly intelligent.
I was in my car, driving to work, when the planes hit. I guess being late for work (or maybe driving too fast?) saved me?
(in case someone wonders, the road I was driving on was I-380 between Coralville and Cedar Rapids in IA).
She was on United Airlines flight 93 and took out the terrorists, and they crashed. She got lost in Amish country PA and the government declared her taken by 9/11….but she survived with no memory, then she befriended a nice Amish guy Jedediah. They eventually married and were happy for 15 years but then she got hit in the head with a butter churn and remembered she was George Santos’ mom. She Ubered to Long Island but she stopped for breakfast. It happened to be a drag queen brunch and she had a heart attack. The drag queen was Georgina Santas.
Not supporting him or defending his BS claim but he could mean that a 9/11 illness caused the death. It’s still a lie because we all know none of it happened, because George Santos’ mom was on the ISS on 2001 while George Santos was walking on the moon.
George Santos, a prolific college athlete and an animal lover raised by a wonderful lesbian couple. It’s a shame we all don’t get to experience two moms. But twice the love, twice the sadness.
George santos was born on July 22nd 1988, the same year the Kosovo conflict started. Coincidence? I think not. George santos was the one who planned all of it while he was in the womb.
Ah yes, thank you fellow citizen. Years go by and the memory falters. But we can’t have that can we? Not when it comes to convicted rapist Brock A. Turner.
May our corrupt politicians be half as fervently remembered as he 🍻
PSA to use hydrogen peroxide to get santorum stains out of your sheets.
Every Democrat instantly dies, every assault weapon is magically converted to full-auto, and a bald eagle personally blesses every successful birth that wasn't prevented by murderous liberals. Those children drop out of school at an early age (shortly thereafter, education is formally outlawed) so they can become hard-working tradesmen before puberty, and every LGBTQ individual is burned at the stake.
From the heavens above, Jesus nods in approval. At long last, socialism has been defeated, and freedom has prevailed. Every year, Nancy Pelosi returns from Valhalla to attempt to destroy liberty, and every year, Ronald Reagan must be summoned to destroy her.
"God Bless America" is played on all radio frequencies globally 24/7. Asbestos laws are repealed. Lead is dumped into all river heads.
Hunter isn’t a politician. Why can’t these half wits understand that?
If Joe Biden was guilty of any wrongdoing, by all means bring charges. But all I see are allegations towards Hunter, and nothing that incriminates his father. No one is defending Hunter in being a human equivelent of dog shit…but even still, he never held office.
I can’t remember the exact issue but something about Hunter with Burisma being a backdoor deal arranged by his Dad? Maybe? I don’t know. I don’t keep up on conspiracy theories.
And they couldn’t figure out if Biden was still in office. Which if he wasn’t, there’s no wrong doing other than questionable ethics for monetary gain using his name.
Don't blame this on mental illness. This is straight up greed and lust for power and money. He watched other repubs just do whatever they want for the last several years and thought he'd try his hand.
Luckily, like most of them, he's as smart as a toenail.
He's living his best life.
He's physically and mentally just fine.
He's morally bankrupt.
Being bad isn't a mental illness. Mentally ill people are not bad.
He needs bars, not barbiturates.
Santos is just so weird...
Everyone lies, that isn't what I find so weird. But not only is the stuff he is lying about just WEIRD, but he can't even keep his story straight.
I mean (at least???) the unemployment theft isn’t really weird. It’s confusing in its simplistic idiocy, but not truly weird. Though I guess it is just 1 of the like 15 charges he’s facing 😂😂
Even though in January [it was been exposed that Santos' mother was living in Rio on 9/11](https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/congress/records-show-george-santos-mom-wasnt-us-sept-11-rcna66411) and hadn't been in the US between 1999 and 2003, his [website](https://georgeforny.com/about/) STILL says she was in the South Tower [four months later](https://imgur.com/SeXszgr).
I'm running for Congress myself next election. Here's some of my bio.
I was board certified in cardiovascular surgery at the age of 19. I was emperor of china from 1975 to 1995. I resigned because I went to Mars in a space ship that I built at the company I started. That company is called NASA. I sold said company to the US government for 5 trillion dollars. I then donated that money to South Africa so they could end apartheid. I also smell very nice without even showering.
Well she jumped off the top when she saw the plane coming. That’s just how tall those buildings were, it took her fifteen years to land. Something about the updraft.
I didn't care about Chelsea. I didn't care about Jenna and the other one. I didn't care about Sasha and Malia. I was annoyed by but didn't care about the don, Erik, and Ivanka.
why the fuck are we talking about hunter so much. just fucking stop grasping at straws. especially when the things you are saying he did, the trumps did 1000x worse.
Obviously this dudes a fucking weirdo but just out of curiosity, is he trying to say that his mom died because of like cancer caused by exposure on 9/11 in 2016?
Side note: who the hell gives a crap about Hunter? If he's such a terrible dude then why don't Republicans just call for him to be removed from office?
Don't you guys realize that in the second tweet, George was referring to two different people in each of the two sentences. His friend and mentor is someone other than his mother. He just happened to mention his mother in the second sentence. /s
Fuck this guy. But I believe she may have died from health complications she sustained during 9/11. (Fumes causing cancer or something like that) So that part is legit. But fuck this dude.
Maybe the second one is like Britney's "Does anyone think global warming is real? I love Lady Gaga. I think she's a really interesting artist." type of tweet.
Reminded of this classic M\*A\*S\*H Bit:
Henry Blake : The father dying, right?
Klinger : Yes, sir.
Henry Blake : \[takes out a stack of papers and reads them\] Father dying last year. Mother dying last year. Mother AND father dying. Mother, father, and older sister dying. Mother dying and older sister pregnant. Older sister dying and mother pregnant. Younger sister pregnant and older sister dying. Here's an oldie but a goodie: Half of the family dying, other half pregnant.
No, you don't understand: his mom wasn't just a first responder, she was the FIRST first responder. Very first one in the towers that day, and got black lung for her efforts /s
she died not only 9/11/2001 but also 12/23/2016. Crazy how she died twice.
Holy shit she rose from the dead like Jesus… but then the second time wasn’t able to? 🤣
Everybody gets one
I prob used mine up when I was really drunk and don't even remember it what a rip off.
I imagine most of us get our feeebee as babies, theres a reason you hear things like "babies are surprisingly resistant!" From people who've dropped kids straight on their soft spots.....
Sure they're resistant but dropped enough times and they start acting like Santos here
Definitely! I fell out of a window as a baby onto a row of upturned bricks (decorative garden barrier). Fortunately, the adjustable screen that I popped out of the window while waving goodbye to my aunt served as a barrier. That was my one. A cousin of mine tumbled down a straight run of basement stairs when he was also about a year old and turned out to be incredibly intelligent.
And now look at ya, typing and everything. Proud of you and your negligence.
Tell 'em Peter.
Uh, apparently everyone gets one.
*Bingo*
*thwip*
Wow! Thanks, Spider-Man!
The second respawn has a noticeable delay.
All that extra time on earth and she still couldn't raise a decent human being
Fucking ous ous I like this one
Why do you think George has so much confidence in himself? 🙄
Crystallized.
Collect them stones, Kennedy!
Omg I love you for that.... if you meant what I think you did
YOLT
Nice
Maybe it takes like 10 years to come back?
Damn, I used up my resurrection when I was in preschool, I didn't know I needed to save it
Bet you learned your lesson. Yeah.
Immigration records showed that she wasn't in the country in 2001. He also called her a 9/11 survivor in another interview.
Technically everyone above 22 is I guess.
I was in Laval, Canada skipping school to play Asheron's Call. It was a close call.
I was in my car, driving to work, when the planes hit. I guess being late for work (or maybe driving too fast?) saved me? (in case someone wonders, the road I was driving on was I-380 between Coralville and Cedar Rapids in IA).
You weren’t too far away from me! I was at home doing whatever two years olds do lmao.
Whoa, I forgot about Asheron’s Call, it was EverQuest in my case.
Oh, it was all about Everquest for me too. But I had to stop playing because I was failing in school 
Oh man, I was on EQ too back then. 2001 would have been peak original Trilogy, good times
I mean I also survived 9/11. I mean I was 1 at the time and at the other side of the country but you usually don't see me bragging about it. smh
Schrödinger's mother.
Technically speaking, we are all 9/11 survivors
"Sorry, boss, can't make it into work today. My mom died and I'm pretty fucked up about it." "Fuck you, George, this is the fifth mother this year."
Lesbian polycules be like:
Me when all 5 of my mothers die 😭😭😭😭😭😭
Excuse me, those are SIX crying emojis. You have a 6th mother, don't you?
We dont talk about number *six* >:(
That mom's name? Sekiro
Goddamn you for reminding me I ragequit that game
Do you have any idea how painful it is to lose your mom twice?
That’s a bit insensitive. He might have lost his mom more than two times. You do know.
She died on the 23rd December of September.
Every college professor’s nightmare 😝😝
The mom so nice god killed her twice
I saw a video of him saying his mom was a 9/11 survivor too
She was on United Airlines flight 93 and took out the terrorists, and they crashed. She got lost in Amish country PA and the government declared her taken by 9/11….but she survived with no memory, then she befriended a nice Amish guy Jedediah. They eventually married and were happy for 15 years but then she got hit in the head with a butter churn and remembered she was George Santos’ mom. She Ubered to Long Island but she stopped for breakfast. It happened to be a drag queen brunch and she had a heart attack. The drag queen was Georgina Santas.
There is no bad thread about this tweet, but my friend that was beautiful.
hard to believe a drag queen would pass up the chance to call herself Georgina Santatas
Not supporting him or defending his BS claim but he could mean that a 9/11 illness caused the death. It’s still a lie because we all know none of it happened, because George Santos’ mom was on the ISS on 2001 while George Santos was walking on the moon.
My money is on neither date being accurate
This could potentially be true for some folks, but not for him.
George Santos, a prolific college athlete and an animal lover raised by a wonderful lesbian couple. It’s a shame we all don’t get to experience two moms. But twice the love, twice the sadness.
I hea George Santos actually came up with the idea of declaration of independence.
We should all start making George Santos jokes in the same vein as Chuck Norris jokes
But in a negative light
George santos was born on July 22nd 1988, the same year the Kosovo conflict started. Coincidence? I think not. George santos was the one who planned all of it while he was in the womb.
Chuck Norris ended ww2 while George over here started a war smh
I heard his cock is like a horse cock and that he is secretly married to Taylor Swift but no one can know because he also James Bond
Fun fact, Al Gore actually stole the idea for the internet from George Santos.
George Santos? Six time NBA all star George Santos?
8 time all star if you count his ABA career. He taught Dr. J how to dunk.
Taught parliament how to funk. Taught the Ramones how to punk. Taught beds how to bunk.
Thank you. My favorite comment of the day. 🏅
Don’t forget, he taught Fabio how to hunk….
And lil Jon how to crunk
Taught trees how to trunk and yard dogs how to junk….
Fights anorexia to celebrate the chunk
He gave lady Gaga her spunk and cleared my drains of gunk!
Then gave it all up, became a monk.
Taught the Gregorgians how to monk and Floyd Collins how to spelunk
You deserve nice things to happen to you.
George Santos star rapist-swimmer at Stanford? Wait no. What’s his name again?
Are you referring to well known rapist, Brock Allen Turner?
Ah yes, thank you fellow citizen. Years go by and the memory falters. But we can’t have that can we? Not when it comes to convicted rapist Brock A. Turner. May our corrupt politicians be half as fervently remembered as he 🍻 PSA to use hydrogen peroxide to get santorum stains out of your sheets.
[удалено]
Wow important update! Thanks for letting us know!! The rapist formerly known as Brock. Hehehe
Brett Kavanaugh? Wait, no. He’s a Supreme Court justice.
Did he also swim and sexually abuse someone?
Probably
Sexual abuse? yes Swim? Only if you count the excessive alcoholism as swimming in beer.
Is he the same George Santos who won both the Nobel prize for physics and peace In 2017?
The very same! He also won the Pulitzer Prize for this very tweet!
I’m sorry are you talking about 5 time Nobel prize winner George Santos?
Not only that he created the Nobel Prize. That's why it's called the Santos Prize.
George never could keep his lies straight. Can't wait for that court appointment.
Who cares about Hunter, no one elected him for anything?
These morons don't seem to understand that fact lol
Also if he committed crimes, we can go ahead and charge him...? Watch as Democrats proceed to not commit an insurrection over it.
Also, Hunter isn't a sitting member of Congress...or a presidential candidate....and honestly, those distinctions matter
Let's say Hunter ever did get thrown in jail. Okay, now what?
Step 1: Throw hunter in jail Step 2: ??? Step 3: Profit
Step 1: Throw hunter in jail Step 2: Forget his dad is a president Step 3: His dad pardons him Step 4: ??? Step 5: Profit
Every Democrat instantly dies, every assault weapon is magically converted to full-auto, and a bald eagle personally blesses every successful birth that wasn't prevented by murderous liberals. Those children drop out of school at an early age (shortly thereafter, education is formally outlawed) so they can become hard-working tradesmen before puberty, and every LGBTQ individual is burned at the stake. From the heavens above, Jesus nods in approval. At long last, socialism has been defeated, and freedom has prevailed. Every year, Nancy Pelosi returns from Valhalla to attempt to destroy liberty, and every year, Ronald Reagan must be summoned to destroy her. "God Bless America" is played on all radio frequencies globally 24/7. Asbestos laws are repealed. Lead is dumped into all river heads.
Where's Hunter? He's sitting at home, an unindicted man, unlike you George...
I know I saw this before, but let me say “What a total fucking douche”
Please don’t speak about 1997 World Series MVP George Santos like that.
I thought his mother was burned at the stake in Salem which is why he’s sensitive about witch hunts.
He was the mastermind behind the Salem witch hunts.
Hunter isn’t a politician. Why can’t these half wits understand that? If Joe Biden was guilty of any wrongdoing, by all means bring charges. But all I see are allegations towards Hunter, and nothing that incriminates his father. No one is defending Hunter in being a human equivelent of dog shit…but even still, he never held office.
I can’t remember the exact issue but something about Hunter with Burisma being a backdoor deal arranged by his Dad? Maybe? I don’t know. I don’t keep up on conspiracy theories.
And they couldn’t figure out if Biden was still in office. Which if he wasn’t, there’s no wrong doing other than questionable ethics for monetary gain using his name.
Questionable ethics so hot these days.
Name a more iconic duo than questionable ethics and lifelong politicians.
Pretty sure their committee failed to find anything other then dick pics.
... if those were geotagged it would help determine where Hunter was, then!
I only just realized that he was responding to icum4mao
Holy shit thank you for pointing that out! I would’ve totally missed it, but now I have a few questions for George…
One very sick man with severe pathology.
Don't blame this on mental illness. This is straight up greed and lust for power and money. He watched other repubs just do whatever they want for the last several years and thought he'd try his hand. Luckily, like most of them, he's as smart as a toenail.
Instead of George, his name should be... Robber Toe.
I dunno….a toenail smarts like fuck when you smash it off a coffee table…
It is both.
He's living his best life. He's physically and mentally just fine. He's morally bankrupt. Being bad isn't a mental illness. Mentally ill people are not bad. He needs bars, not barbiturates.
Mama's been faking her death, because she's actually a plant for Interpol. Right, George
When reached for comment, attorney for Santos, Anthony Devolder, said the charges are false, the biggest lies he has ever heard.
So you're saying that he's never even talked to George?
I was about to say that was out of line, but then I read closer. Jesus _fuck_, this man needs to be committed.
Can we circle back to him responding to @icum4mao?
And Jair Bolsonaro’s account?
Santos is just so weird... Everyone lies, that isn't what I find so weird. But not only is the stuff he is lying about just WEIRD, but he can't even keep his story straight.
I mean (at least???) the unemployment theft isn’t really weird. It’s confusing in its simplistic idiocy, but not truly weird. Though I guess it is just 1 of the like 15 charges he’s facing 😂😂
Why are Republicans so fucking obsessed with a son who ain’t even actively serving in government?
Who they admitted yesterday hasn’t done anything illegal that they can find.
Projection. They got dangerously close to realizing the nepotism of the Trump administration and so they started lashing out.
He was adopted by a lesbian couples (?)
https://preview.redd.it/i7nodwtgd5za1.jpeg?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c54af132a8d005939d55aa6def0ad6de0b2aae5e
Even though in January [it was been exposed that Santos' mother was living in Rio on 9/11](https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/congress/records-show-george-santos-mom-wasnt-us-sept-11-rcna66411) and hadn't been in the US between 1999 and 2003, his [website](https://georgeforny.com/about/) STILL says she was in the South Tower [four months later](https://imgur.com/SeXszgr).
I'm running for Congress myself next election. Here's some of my bio. I was board certified in cardiovascular surgery at the age of 19. I was emperor of china from 1975 to 1995. I resigned because I went to Mars in a space ship that I built at the company I started. That company is called NASA. I sold said company to the US government for 5 trillion dollars. I then donated that money to South Africa so they could end apartheid. I also smell very nice without even showering.
Well she jumped off the top when she saw the plane coming. That’s just how tall those buildings were, it took her fifteen years to land. Something about the updraft.
Probably at an orgy, dude. What's it to you?
George Santos (aka Anthony devolder, aka George devolder, aka Anthony santos) is one of the worst liars I've ever seen
She was also a Titanic and Black ‘47 survivor. RIP
This only works in college not Twitter. Twitter has receipts
I’m laughing so hard at him replying to @icum4mao.
I didn't care about Chelsea. I didn't care about Jenna and the other one. I didn't care about Sasha and Malia. I was annoyed by but didn't care about the don, Erik, and Ivanka. why the fuck are we talking about hunter so much. just fucking stop grasping at straws. especially when the things you are saying he did, the trumps did 1000x worse.
Hopefully she disowned his stupid ass a long time ago. Also hope she is living her best life in another country anyway from this DB of a human
No, skiing in Vermont. It was during 9/11, 2017
That guy lies more than Trump.
Where’s Hunter? Probably doing your mom. Too soon?
Did she not die right the first time?
He’s gonna have so much fun in prison. “I used to be somebody. I was a Congressman.”
To be fair, most of us aren’t so obsessive about 9/11 that we remember what date it happened on.
Obviously this dudes a fucking weirdo but just out of curiosity, is he trying to say that his mom died because of like cancer caused by exposure on 9/11 in 2016?
I don't remember the source, but I heard his mom was in Brazil on 9/11.
Close call.
He also said he was Jewish then later clarified he was “Jew-ish.” I wish i were kidding…fuck
I can’t wait for this biopic to drop in 10 years.
George Santos? The actor?!
Hunter ain't in jail and facing charges, lol.
Medic….💀💀
Besides his lawyer, has anyone come to his defense yet? Has even a single mouth-breather claimed that it's a witch hunt, deep state conspiracy, etc?
I'm actually waiting for him to ask for compassion because his mom just passed, for the 3rd time!
Getting caught in a lie like that in the internet is the most pathetic thing ever.
RIP his dad who was lost at sea after returning from the moon where he started the first Pizza Hut.
More like, when was mom?
WHY was Mom?
He said this was a witch hunt. Now he’s claiming to be a witch?
Those conflicting statements are enough to federally indict you.
9/11 she died. Her leftovers got lost a few years later. Never forgotten.
Side note: who the hell gives a crap about Hunter? If he's such a terrible dude then why don't Republicans just call for him to be removed from office?
Don't you guys realize that in the second tweet, George was referring to two different people in each of the two sentences. His friend and mentor is someone other than his mother. He just happened to mention his mother in the second sentence. /s
ahahahahahaha you guys still pay that dude's salary with your tax dollars. what a shitshow
He had two moms
One died from 9/11 the other died from Thanos snap r.i.p.
What if his moms are lesbian???
Maybe he doesn't know what year 9/11 happened on
This dude is a comedy gold mine
Icumformao?!!
Where is Thumbkin?!
I mean if I were his parent I would also fake my death multiple times to get a break…
Dude knows how to tap into the Republican base
That’s terrible. Reminds me of that tragedy.
What did she mentor him in, fuckwittery?
I know next to nothing about this guy, but did his mom die of complications from 9/11? Like cancer? Or his he just caught red handed in a lie?
Eeeeesh. That.... Is not a good look. This guy has pure sociopath vibes going on.
Santos is a total fraud.
Fuck this guy. But I believe she may have died from health complications she sustained during 9/11. (Fumes causing cancer or something like that) So that part is legit. But fuck this dude.
His mother was in Rio on 9/11, and his website still says she was in the south tower.
didn't know he had 2 moms, what a progressive guy!
I am surprised he is not claiming to be Hunter Biden at this point.
As they say; When you corner a wild republican they start throwing accusations around to try and defend themselves
Maybe the second one is like Britney's "Does anyone think global warming is real? I love Lady Gaga. I think she's a really interesting artist." type of tweet.
Shit, if that ever make a sequel to Liar Liar, George Santos needs to replace Jim Carey as the protagonist
The fall back for these conservatives a hole are what about Hunter.What about Hillary.What about the democrats.
He's still talking shit on Twitter like nothing is going to happen to him.
He’s so obviously using Trump’s playbook here only problem is no one likes him at all
She's got to be so disappointed in him.
Exactly. He can’t accessorize for shit.
His moms were just lesbians, obviously /s
#icumformao
Reminded of this classic M\*A\*S\*H Bit: Henry Blake : The father dying, right? Klinger : Yes, sir. Henry Blake : \[takes out a stack of papers and reads them\] Father dying last year. Mother dying last year. Mother AND father dying. Mother, father, and older sister dying. Mother dying and older sister pregnant. Older sister dying and mother pregnant. Younger sister pregnant and older sister dying. Here's an oldie but a goodie: Half of the family dying, other half pregnant.
No, you don't understand: his mom wasn't just a first responder, she was the FIRST first responder. Very first one in the towers that day, and got black lung for her efforts /s
Nah, he was raised by lesbians
To lose your mother once is a tragedy, losing her twice smacks of carelessness.