Legally they cant force you fiy. You can put the baby up for adoption but your 16 you need someone to help you. You need to get some therapy and the first doctor visit request to speak to an ob alone and explain your situation to get options
Contact the auntie network on the internet (THROUGH A SECURE/ INCOGNITO BROWSER or on a friend's phone!), or any of the other groups that can help you get abortion pills. Have the pills sent to someone you trust - which, apparently, shouldn't be your stbx boyfriend, the asshole.
After you take the pills, destroy the packaging and leave absolutely no trace - best destroy them out of the house, never even take any part of the envelope or packaging home. The symptoms of a medical abortion are exactly like a miscarriage - nobody will be able to tell the difference. But you have to act fast, there is a time limit - I think the pills work only within the first 12 weeks? Anyway, the earlier, the easier, so better get it over with fast.
And then tell your ex that you will never speak to him and his parents again, after what they did to you! You TOLD him how your parents would react and what would happen, and he still betrayed you!
The Aunties are fantastic but they cannot/do not assist minors. She should try Planned Parenthood JanesDueProcess.org or go her local health department for advice resources/recommendations
I just looked on that sub and it made me cry, how many wonderful people who want to help. I am also very disappointed in America that it has to come to this. When did it become mentally religious.
>your stbx boyfriend, the asshole
This is extreme. He's a scared kid who was facing a major life changing event. They couldn't even afford an abortion. He did the right thing telling his parents. They are kids, they are in a serious situation, they need help. Chill out on condemning scared kids.
She TOLD him how her parents are. I get he needed to tell his parents, but couldn't he have been more explicit about how her parents are and how they would react? His parents could have been a great support to them and helped them achieve whatever solution they deemed best for everyone - instead, they involved her parents and took everyone's choice away. That is completely on them, and I hope they are feeling horrible about it at the moment. Especially since they've also trapped their son in unwanted parenthood.
Maybe.
But - whatever the reason - OP has these 'very strict' parents who think nothing of trying to force their child (!) to give birth to a baby she is not ready for.
She is afraid of them - and told BF and his parents this - yet they still betrayed her trust, and possibly endangered her.
Bluntly put - yes,I think BF and his parents are wrong - and given the fact OP already is depressed, their betrayal could escalate this - unless OP finds help and support she needs (and obviously is not getting from her parents).
So, yeah, from OPs point of view - the (soon to be?) ex BF is an AH.
Limiting that is doing OP a disservice or invalidates her feelings.
The parents had no right to reveal it to ops parents. They could have gotten her harmed if the fundie parents were crazier. As is, they took her options from her and trapped her into an unwanted pregnancy.
I don't blame the parents either. Honestly, they were probably thinking long term what if the baby stays and we all have to co grandparent. There's a lot of moving parts here. The right thing to do is really hard to figure out.
>As a parent, if my child was ever in this situation I’d want my kid to feel safe enough to tell me.
Right? I'm thinking how lucky the boyfriend is to have parents he *could* go to. I feel for op.
Yeah, well, his parents, in their infinite wisdom, have betrayed their trust and contributed to taking all their choices away from them and forcing the son who trusted them into unwanted fatherhood. Parents of the year, for sure...
I gave birth when I was young and it was a life changing ordeal. It’s not something that adoption will fix. You’ll always remember and know a child of yours is out there. Get an abortion
Your boyfriend's parents suck. I'm so sorry. I would never do this to my kids. If you ever need a safe place, r/MomForaMinute is here for you. You can get advice, understanding, love, or just a simple hug.
OP, you don’t even have to go the adoption route if you don’t want to; there are ways to get abortion pills privately and you can always claim miscarriage. You’re not out of options yet.
And NTA, I’d feel similarly resentful of my boyfriend if he told without my permission. That might be a dealbreaker for me.
You can order abortion pills online, unless you’re in Texas. Just tell them you think you’re miscarrying when you’re on the last pill. Otherwise you are going to play what if for the rest of your life.
Reach out to a family planning clinic as soon as possible. This will not be the first time they've helped someone in your exact circumstance, but the longer you wait, the harder it gets.
OP, your parents can make all the plans they like, but your life is yours and yours alone. You are old enough to decide for yourself. If you don't want to be pregnant, it is your right to end it. Period.
If lying makes it easier to deal with them, so be it. Tell them you had a miscarriage. Most of all, be kind to yourself. Wishing you the best, hon🫂
Agreed! You have the right to choose what happens to your body. You can alwasy ask for help if you feel unsafe or at risk of being forced to do something you dont want.
Dispite what they'll tell you, this is 100% your choice and they can butt out of it. If you feel an abortion is the best option, then get an abortion. This is your life, not theirs.
It’s not too late. You can get an abortion. I’d rather have my parents freak out and be mad, than carry an unwanted pregnancy to term.
YOUR body. NOT theirs.
do what you want sweetheart quite literally fuck them and what they want if you decide on an abortion then that is all that matters the can kiss your ass and you can tell them that to their face.
OP you will never recover from the trauma of giving a baby up for adoption. Pls try to get to a safe haven state and do what is right for you if that means getting an abortion. Don’t let your abusive parents do this to you, and don’t listen to pro life lunatics online!
Wanted to say I think you can talk to someone at your school about getting an advocate of some kind to help you with the adoption process and to somewhat make it where you don’t feel so alone dealing with your parents
Depending on the state in which OP lives, they may not need their parents' permission to end the pregnancy either. They're not required to use insurance coverage or even provide their social security number to medical staff. Unless they are a danger to themselves or others, Federally Qualified Health Centers (which most community clinics are) *are required by law* to maintain confidentiality. They are prohibited from sharing any protected health information regardless of who pays for the visit. For minors 13 years of age or older, staff cannot talk to anyone about the minor patient's medical record without their written consent. Particularly when it comes to sexual health/STIs/pregnancy, substance use, and behavioral health
Depending on how far along OP is, they may still be able to get a prescription to abort. As long as they can get to a family planning clinic and arrange after care or at least transport to a medical center in case something goes wrong while they recuperate, then that's all that matters for now
Look up Auntie Network.
You don't need to tell your parents jack shit. You can go to planned parenthood without them, get the combination pill, then tell tjem you miscarried. Which isn't a lie, that's what the pill does. Induces a miscarriage.
I have the pill at home that I’m willing to ship out tomorrow. I panic bought after the last SCOTUS ruling and it’s nearing its expiration date. You just need to find a way to receive it. PM me OP.
Doesn't happen very often, but you have restored a tiny bit of my faith in humanity. Good job!
The idea that a condom split can lead to someone having to forcibly give birth and being burdened with raising a child for the next couple of decades is like something out of the scariest horror movie to me.
For a nation so obsessed with sex, its so weird that you've turned sex into a more stressful game of Russian Roulette. "Land of the free"? What freedoms are people so happy with when you can't just enjoy a nice (consentual) shag without fear it will wreck your whole life...
This. 👆. It's YOUR life. You can wait to be angry with your bf until later. Enlist a good friend who can keep her mouth shut to help you. Your bf has proven that's not in his skillset.
This is a bummer-- from r/auntienetwork: "Because of legal issues with parental rights, we cannot assist minors, but we do have two resources that can help." And then they direct you to Planned Parenthood.
Oh I would never assist a minor in getting an abortion. But I am available for a quick tour of my closest big city and happy to accommodate any sleepovers for traveling young women! I usually love loooong trips to the mall in the big city, so if my guest used that time to do something else while I shopped, I would totally understand.
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Get an abortion anyway and tell everyone - INCLUDING your boyfriend who can’t keep his mouth shut - that it was a miscarriage. Don’t let them ruin your life.
Op. Please get in touch with Auntie Network on Reddit. I posted this earlier.
Your parents forcing you to give birth and be a teen mom doesn't seem to take into consideration what their actual daughter wants. 15 is too young to have a child.
Fight for yourself and your rights!
I thought about that, but given how they went behind OP's back to tell her parents, I don't think they'd be the supportive adults she needs. I mean, they didn't even give her the grace of saying "you need to tell your parents", they straight up ambushed her.
Being a first time mom at 27 and experiencing how exhausting and life altering it is to raise a baby I feel for you so much. This is not fair to you in any way. Raising a baby is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do in my life even with all the help and support I have I couldn’t imagine doing this as a teenager. Take your life in your hands OP get the abortion pill, tell everyone you miscarried and go to therapy because everything you’re going through and will continue to go through even after the abortion is so difficult
Same. I'm 29 with a much planned for and wanted pregnancy. It's so hard! I can't imagine being forced to go through this much less at 15. Definitely not fair or right. Poor OP. I hope she can figure out a solution that works for her, and gets the therapy and help she needs.
I don’t think it’s supportive that a) your bf told his parents or b) that they went against your wishes and told your parents knowing full well that they would force you into having the baby. I hope you find your way to what’s best for you.
The boyfriend isn't the problem. He had every right to tell his parents seeing as its his kid too but his parents are not supportive. They pushed there own agenda on her and their son.
I disagree. Either he agreed with abortion and jeopardized her ability to get one by telling his parents against her wishes and without consent or warning or he disagreed with the abortion and told his parents to prevent her from getting one.
Either way, his unilateral decision about their mutual problem led to the exact outcome OP has been sick over since she found out she was pregnant. Whether or not it was his right to share that information, he betrayed her and she'll be the one to suffer the most for it. He may not have done it with ill intent, but he has caused her serious harm. Abortion would be unforgivable to her parents. They might even blame her for a miscarriage. Childbirth can be traumatic and life altering, life ending even. I doubt parents like hers will ever let her forget even if she had the baby adopted out. Regardless, everyone will see her pregnant and know, which can take a big emotional toll on a person and she's already struggling.
This would be unforgivable for me. I feel really sorry for OP and I'm hoping she gets the best possible outcome despite the cards she's been dealt.
Check out the resources in r/abortion (there are some good links in the sticky post at the top). You can make a post there, tell them your approximate location (down to the state/province) and your age, and they can help you further. You may be able to do this easily and without anyone's permission.
I'm so heartbroken for you. In any outcome it's going to be hard. Whether you keep the baby, put it up for adoption or try to abort on the sly.
Since your BFs parents are supportive is there any way they would order abortion pills and have them sent to their house? You could possibly take them and tell your parents you had a miscarriage?
This is a very scary time for you. BUT you do have a support system in place. And that's great! I can't give you any direction. All I can do is wish for a peaceful mind to come for you.
If you have questions about whether you can get an abortion without involving your parent, if you would like help navigating the judicial bypass process, or if you don’t have your parents in your life and want to understand your options, you can contact the If/When/How Judicial Bypass Helpline by calling 844-868-2812 or submitting a request online.
You’re not alone. If you’re pregnant and want to have an abortion, contact your nearest Planned Parenthood health center as soon as possible. They can help explain the laws in your state, let you know what your options are, and help you talk with your parents. You can also visit AbortionFinder.org.
This must be terrifying. As others have suggested, there are ways to abort the embryo without your parents consent. I would contact these people: [https://aidaccess.org/en/](https://aidaccess.org/en/) They are legit, and helped me once. They might even be able to help with the fee. DM me if you need to talk.
If it’s early enough you can do a medication abortion and it will be exactly like a miscarriage.
Even if they make you go to the doctor they can’t tell the difference.
Go to abuzz health dot com. You enter the amount you can/are willing to pay, and they will mail Plan C pills to you. You can have it sent to your boyfriend’s house or somewhere else you trust.
This is your choice. Your parents don’t have the right to block your access to reproductive care. You might have to sneak to get what you want, but you don’t need their permission to get an abortion.
Have the abortion and tell them you miscarried. You can have the pills mailed to you (or to a friend, if your parents go through your mail).
You are miserable about this and children should be wanted and cared for by someone who wasn't forced to give birth.
You have terrible parents, I'm sorry to say.
1. Break up with your boyfriend. You don’t tell him anything.
2. You mentioned saving up for an abortion. If abortion is legal where you are, there may be financial aid available *that you don’t have to pay back*. This is especially true for the United States, and there are even funds for you to travel to obtain an abortion.
3. There are Auntie networks to help give you a place to stay, a car to ride in, etc. to get you where you need to go.
Keep saving up for your abortion. If you can’t trust your friends but you’re able to drive, your abortion clinic can help you find resources to get this done.
If it’s early, you will likely have to take 2 pills on separate days rather than just 1 pill. Take the first pill, stay overnight, take the next pill, go home and pretend you’re miscarrying.
Once you have your plan **DELETE YOUR INTERNET HISTORY**. Delete your apps. Delete this post. Delete this account.
Good luck.
You have choices. You just need to find resources, quickly.
Don't worry, right now, about feeling like the asshole, or resenting your boyfriend. Put all that aside for a sec, and find a trusted support network to help you figure out your options. Someone mentioned some subreddits here, that's a start.
Aidaccess.org. plancpills.org. laslibres.org. three sources for cheap or free abortion pills. Tell your parents you are miscarrying. No way that anyone can tell you took the pills.
How horrible, for them to force you to bear a child. You do not have to obey them!
Not wrong
Please read the comments and find help from someone to get the abortion pills. Please don't go through with the pregnancy and don't tell your ex boyfriend, he is a jerk. You deserve control over your body and its nobody's else decision. ******Update us
NTA.
You can get an abortion.
Then tell them you've a miscarriage.
You need to get it done ASAP so that the cost doesn't escalate.
A 6 week old abortion is not similar to a 19 week old abortion.
In some places, it's illegal to abort a 20 week old fetus.
You need to make a decision fast.
Just go to a clinic.
Preferably a government clinic.
Don't DIY.
If you give up a child for adoption, the child will hunt you down years later.
This is human nature.
Pardon me for a few minutes while I'm completely blunt. You don't owe anyone a baby & they can't force you to keep it. You do have more power than you think because there are resources to help you. You just have to get tough & take some potential risks. I say this with perfect love for my fellow human & zero judgment.
You may want to figure out an escape plan & cut these people off. They are not acting in your best interest. There are shelters designed for situations like that & it sounds like time for you to flee & be rescued. I hope you can find courage to do whatever is right for you. My best wishes to you.
It is your life. You should be able to decide on your own with the father. If you need to not carry this child then you can make that happen. Having a raising a child will severely affect your future. If that is something you want then great but if it is not you should be able to choose. I am a Christian who feels like all the options can work so pick the one that works best for you. Adoption is a wonderful thing, being a mom is too but if you can’t do those things let it go.
Fuck your boyfriend (idiot), fuck his parents, and fuck your parents.
ONLY YOU are in charge of YOUR body.
This is going to be tough, but this is your time to make the choice for yourself. There are networks to help you. Don’t give into their pressure. Leave if you have to.
Very sorry love.
Abortion bills can be obtained:
[Plan C](https://www.plancpills.org/)
[AidAccess](https://aidaccess.org/en/)
[Women on web](https://www.womenonweb.org/en/)
Well you need the abortion and to dump your asshole boyfriend who went behind you back and blabbed. It's clear he cannot be trusted with sensitive information. Just get the abortion, there is no guarantee the kid will be adopted and there is no reason to put your body through that.
Depending on the state you live in, you can go to Planned Parenthood and get abortion pills without their permission. It’ll look like a miscarriage, just be careful to dispose of the packaging somewhere they won’t find it. If they take you to a hospital, there’s no way for them to know either.
Your parents don’t have a say in what goes in or out of your vagina. Giving birth is a dangerous thing, especially when you’re young. Don’t let them force you into making a decision that you will regret.
Get the abortion no one should ever make someone go through a pregnancy they do not want. Pregnancy and birth have risks of complications, issues, illnesses etc, imagine something happened to you during pregnancy or the birth that sticks with you for the rest of your life let alone going through with a pregnancy and birth you absolutely didn’t want.
Its very shitty that your boyfriend told his parents. Your parents telling you that you have to proceed with the birth and keep the child is not fair on you at all. Everyone has the right to bodily autonomy and they should all respect that and your choices. It is ultimately your decision regardless if anyone supports or helps you.
I’m so sorry you’re going through this but please by any means do not let them force you to do something so major against your will.
Your bf is a fucking peice of garbage. And he baby trapped you. He shouldn't have told on you like a little bitch. I'm so sorry and this is a nightmare. You have to practice safe sex!
Listen, I am not entirely sure where you live so I don’t know the laws regarding abortion. However, if you do and you are allowed to get an abortion without your parental consent: do it.
I can tell keeping the baby is horrifying to you beyond belief - and I can safely say having a baby at your age before you could even START your life is going to be extremely difficult and something a lot of people would not want to go through with.
Your bf’s parents going behind your back and telling your parents is terrible - you are getting robbed from your decision; a life changing one at that.
So listen to me carefully: if you really don’t want to, please go to a clinic and figure out your options (WITHOUT YOUR PARENTS). They are not supportive of you - they are forcing you. You are allowed to make a decision that will affect YOU for the rest of your life, not them. Then don’t tell them, unless you know they will accept your decision over time, tell them you had a miscarriage. It is better to lie in situations like this while you still have to rely on them - because this is YOUR life and you need to prioritize yourself and your happiness not the mindset of your parents.
I hate the boyfriend and I hate the boyfriend’s parents right now.
They, truly, don’t understand that some people are shitty. That there is no “talking it out” with those kinds of self-righteous, religious, assholes.
They better step the fuck up for their grandchild’s mother because *her parents?* Are going to destroy her life.
They can’t make you keep it, it’s not their body.
If abortion is legal where you live, go to a free clinic for correct and up to date advice on what your options are.
If you want an abortion, find a way to get one. You can tell them you miscarried. It will be more difficult, but not impossible. I would say get your boyfriend to save faster but his confession has put you in this situation, and he may not be a safe person to share information with.
You don't need their permission to do an abortion
Just go to the clinic and afterwards tell your parents you lost the baby if you don't want to tell the truth
OP I was in your shoes. Find a clinic to talk with someone. You need someone to talk to who is knowledgeable to educate you. You need to look at your future.
The most important thing to remember is that this problem doesn't have to be the end for you. There are options. It's okay to feel upset, hurt, depressed, anxious, or any other emotion - but if you start having thoughts of suicide, call a crisis help line immediately (I'm guessing you're in the US, and I have no idea what crisis lines are available there sorry - other people in this thread would be able to help).
The options are still absolutely yours and yours alone. If you believe an abortion is the best option for you, speak to a family planning clinic and get their help. Don't include your parents. Don't include your boyfriend. Don't include your boyfriend's parents.
If you have a friend you can trust, get them to help you though it.
OP, it is in your right to feel resentful of your bf. I know I would too if I were in this situation.
If adoption is available, then take it. Don’t look back on your choice if you don’t want the baby. If you were worried about this to begin with, then there’s a HUGE chance you are going to resent your baby for its whole life. Don’t give up.
Or, you can ask your boyfriend’s parents to secretly take you to Planned Parenthood and get it done. Maybe stay with them when your parents find out? Stay with a friend who would be willing to drive you there, help you find a doctor, anything under the sun that can help you spare this baby and yourself from a nightmare of a lifetime being under your parents’ thumb.
Your parents are talking about adoption but deep down you’re depressed because you know they will make you keep the baby and will make you raise it.
You need a boyfriend and ask him why he told the parents and if you were forced to raise his baby then he will be there every step of the way because part of it is his fault
My suggestion to you is to have another family meeting (both families) and explain your feelings/thoughts without hesitation. Why you feel that abortion is the option. Talk things through. Ask them what happens when you want to go to college? What if you & bf break up? Babysitting? Just throw ALL scenarios out there and if you do keep the baby.
Im sorry that they involved yr parents. Will the boys parents take you to the clinic to have an abortion? Maybe they can pay for it and you can work a plan to pay half back. You can reach out to planned parenthood and other places but you must move fast. Dont sit on this. Dont let your parents bully you or lock you in the house against yr will. When its over and youre recovering make sure to get another type birth control. But do something soon. Be proactive.
you must get an abortion without anyone knowing
none of those parents, and not your bf.
leave home asap
find good hearted people to host you, and don't return home before the abortion is done.
PS. there might be legal complexities here.
you might be a minor legally. leaving home might mean they'll get the police to track you and return you home by force. so anyone helping you might also have legal issues
so check the law. look up for your options.
get the abortion done as fast as humanely possible.
why delay will cause more crap
Contact Planned Parenthood nearest to where you live. They can advise you on your options. In some states, you can have an abortion without your parents knowledge or consent if you are 16. Contact them today to get the information you need to make the decision that will serve you best. THAT WILL SERVE YOU BEST. NOT YOUR PARENTS. NOT YOUR BOYFRIEND'S PARENTS. YOU.
You should feel betrayed because your boyfriend violated your trust and his parents set up a meeting without your knowledge was 100% disgusting and wrong. If you don’t want the child you shouldn’t keep it especially because you want a different future. If your parents don’t suppose you, oh well. Ditch that boyfriend and tell everyone you lost the baby. This post honestly made me mad and sad at the same time.
You’re not wrong it’s your life, me and my gf found these abortion pills online and they worked for her. Said she was cramping bad but it wasn’t horrible. I would gladly send you the link if you want it.
Benjamin Franklins autobiography had a recipe to coax ones missing period.
There's several options of herbal teas that would cause an abortion.
You do not have to have a baby you don't want just because your parents are trying to force you to do so. Get that nonsense out of your head and fight back. That is your body and you are in control of it. 😳
NTA. You trusted him and he broke your trust. His parents going to yours shows his whole family cannot be trusted where you are concerned. Worse, your parents are bullies. You need to decide for yourself. Don't let anyone force you to do anything you aren't totally comfortable with. I'm sorry you aren't getting the support you need and deserve.
Are there any normal non-biased people here. No abortion is not evil and children shouldn't raise children.
The Boyfriends only mistake was to trust his parents.
He is young and clueless... If both were mature they wouldn't be in that situation.
There is no evil intent from him. He also needed help to solve the Situation cause he is way to young to find a solution for himself.
His parents tho should have asked for your consent before telling your parents. For all it is worth the boy acted responsible once in his life.
Are you legally old enough to get an abortion on your own? I would go to Planned Parenthood if there is one near you. It is not your parents’ choice to make.
Have an abortion and tell them you miscarried, I know two young women that had circumstances similar to yours, both of them were promised support when the child came. Neither of them got it. Do what's best for you
Well what I predicted happened much much sooner. This really sucks because now what you didn’t want happening, is and your boyfriend is away from the issue as it is you that’s going to be the one carrying that baby. I know he must think it was the best thing to do but he really fucked up with not coming to you first.
NTA again.
Depending on your state you can get the abortion pill over the counter. Or have someone get it for you. You can say you miscarried. No one should make you have a baby you don’t want.
I am a big believer in my body, my choice. Now it’s not something I could ever do but I have help many hand so far people I love very much as they went through this. There is no waiter answer her but it is not up to your parents where you go from here. But and this may be harsh, unfortunately you plaid like a grown up and now you have a very grown up situation to figure out. I wish you the best and pray you make a decision you can live with for the rest of your life, adoption is always a great idea but again it’s a hard road. Whatever you decide make sure to find a good support system. People who will be there no matter what direction you take with this.
I’m not sure where you are but here in California you can order abortion pills online not sure how much they are or if they take insurance, but you could always do this secretly and just tell everyone you’re having a miscarriage
Get a hold of the abortion pills. Don’t leave any packaging around. Do it right now before it’s too late. You’re very quickly running out of time. Your parents do not have your best interests at heart. Do not ever tell them. Go to college and move on.
i am so sorry this is happening. i have tips to help you naturally miscarry, but it depends on how many weeks you are: caffiene (200mg or more daily), vitamin c (especially orange juice), mugwort tea, pomegranate seeds, hot bath. i'm trying to find more ways as i'm typing. if you do any of these, be very careful, as i don't want your own health at risk or your parents being absolute c--ts over it. i know these from experience.
Your Parents cannot “ Force “ you to keep an unwanted pregnancy. Make your appointment for your termination & just go. None of the medical staff can or would say anything to any one. Tell the counsellor you’re being pressured to keep it when that’s not what you want.
Your Body. Your Life. Your Decision.
In most states you can legally get an abortion without your parents consent, and all states you can buy a plane ticket to get you to a state where you don’t need your parents consent.
You're able to request to talk to thr doctors alone. If you feel like giving the baby up for adoption is the best choice, then it's the best choice! You're parents cannot force you to raise a child You're not ready for.
At ANY point, request to talk to a doctor alone and get advice on how to put the baby up for adoption and tell them your situation
Please please please use the resources others have suggested for you. Your parents should not have a right to force you to give birth, it’s barbaric. Really no one should be forced to give birth but you’re a child, and not ready for a child. I hope you can find some help, I was hoping for a better outcome for you.
Where do you live? I know in my state at age 15, a teenager has full control over their medical and has to agree to even let their parents know things. I know some states that a pregnant teenager becomes medically independent.
I know it feels hopeless, but do some research for where you live and please, please, please reach out to the subreddit I sent you in pm. They can help.
Check your local laws, some states will allow you to terminate as a minor without your parents knowing anything at all about it.
This should be your choice and no one elses/
Try to go to the doctor alone, look up support services online. I'm sorry this is happening, you have a lot more rights pregnant if you can find help. I hope you are able to put this baby up for adoption or get away, try and talk to his parents about helping you with your rights. In the US at least some states have extra protection and help for pregnant teens.
The people in your life aren’t looking out for your best interests. The way that your boyfriend (telling his parents), his parents (telling your parents), and your parents (denying your bodily autonomy) are behaving now is how you can expect them to behave in the future. If you have to have the child, they will continue to prioritize their interests over your own, including pressuring you to keep/give up the baby, pressuring you to adopt dietary/lifestyle changes that they believe in, pressuring you to make medical decisions they want, pressuring you to give birth the way they want, etc.
And it will only get worse if you keep the baby. You can be sure they will all have loud opinions on what you should be doing and how you should be doing it, but you cannot trust them to support you or help you.
You cannot trust these people to look out for you. You are not an incubator. You are not an empty vessel. You are a human deserving of respect and human rights. You need to look out for yourself, even if your needs conflict with their wants. If you need to use secretive methods to end the pregnancy, that is a valid course of action. ❤️
Oh dear! I just saw this honey, and I’m so sorry that I was right that he would tell. Dammit! I’d still get some counseling to help you deal with this situation and check out your rights for your state on being forced into this. They should not force you and it may be against the law.
Girl, it's your body. Just point out that you will either leave the baby with them or put it up for adoption. Idc what anyone says, your boyfriend's a dumbass.
Please make sure you attend your Dr appts alone so you can talk to them alone. Tell them that your parents are forcing you to have this child against your will.
your an adult so they cant force you to keep this baby, while im against abortion i do see you have the rest of your life to have kids so its your decision not theres, as for your BF you should tell him he broke your trust and your done with him as this is your body and he has no say in what you do neither does his parents and if they dont like it tough, if your family are physically forcing you get police involved,
[r/auntienetwork](https://www.reddit.com/r/auntienetwork/)
Please get help....Having this baby will eff you up for life.
I was in your shoes when I was your age. I DO NOT, and never have, regretted MY decision to have an abortion. It is YOUR decision, not your parents.
What state are you in?
When I was young…. Many moons ago, a friend of mine became pregnant at 15, but was only a week or so from turning 16. Our state required parent permission for an abortion if you were under 18. The neighboring state did not require permission if you were 16. So, as soon as she turned 16, we packed her into a car and drove to the neighboring state where she terminated the pregnancy. Best decision.
I’m not sure where you are, but you need to make the best decision for you.
You are not TA for feeling resentful. Your boyfriend is not the one who has to go through pregnancy and childbirth.
Legally they cant force you fiy. You can put the baby up for adoption but your 16 you need someone to help you. You need to get some therapy and the first doctor visit request to speak to an ob alone and explain your situation to get options
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You can talk to doctors alone and find out what your options are. You might not need their permission to have an abortion.
Contact the auntie network on the internet (THROUGH A SECURE/ INCOGNITO BROWSER or on a friend's phone!), or any of the other groups that can help you get abortion pills. Have the pills sent to someone you trust - which, apparently, shouldn't be your stbx boyfriend, the asshole. After you take the pills, destroy the packaging and leave absolutely no trace - best destroy them out of the house, never even take any part of the envelope or packaging home. The symptoms of a medical abortion are exactly like a miscarriage - nobody will be able to tell the difference. But you have to act fast, there is a time limit - I think the pills work only within the first 12 weeks? Anyway, the earlier, the easier, so better get it over with fast. And then tell your ex that you will never speak to him and his parents again, after what they did to you! You TOLD him how your parents would react and what would happen, and he still betrayed you!
The Aunties are fantastic but they cannot/do not assist minors. She should try Planned Parenthood JanesDueProcess.org or go her local health department for advice resources/recommendations
Sometimes people forget their real age. Happens all the time.
How do I support/participate in the auntie network? I've never heard of this but I love the idea.
r/auntienetwork
I just looked on that sub and it made me cry, how many wonderful people who want to help. I am also very disappointed in America that it has to come to this. When did it become mentally religious.
Me too! What an amazing group. We are so lucky in Australia and it saddens me that people don’t have the freedom of choice in many other countries Xx
THIS OP!!!!!! faking a miscarriage through these pills is your best option!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hopefully she sees this
Before 10 weeks!
Thanks!
This should be the top comment. You should message OP.
u/NatureThis3941 this is the comment you need to read
This OP please see this!!! You can add the stress of the families fighting must have caused the "miscarriage".
This is the way.
I think she is past the point where the pills will work
>your stbx boyfriend, the asshole This is extreme. He's a scared kid who was facing a major life changing event. They couldn't even afford an abortion. He did the right thing telling his parents. They are kids, they are in a serious situation, they need help. Chill out on condemning scared kids.
She TOLD him how her parents are. I get he needed to tell his parents, but couldn't he have been more explicit about how her parents are and how they would react? His parents could have been a great support to them and helped them achieve whatever solution they deemed best for everyone - instead, they involved her parents and took everyone's choice away. That is completely on them, and I hope they are feeling horrible about it at the moment. Especially since they've also trapped their son in unwanted parenthood.
Maybe. But - whatever the reason - OP has these 'very strict' parents who think nothing of trying to force their child (!) to give birth to a baby she is not ready for. She is afraid of them - and told BF and his parents this - yet they still betrayed her trust, and possibly endangered her. Bluntly put - yes,I think BF and his parents are wrong - and given the fact OP already is depressed, their betrayal could escalate this - unless OP finds help and support she needs (and obviously is not getting from her parents). So, yeah, from OPs point of view - the (soon to be?) ex BF is an AH. Limiting that is doing OP a disservice or invalidates her feelings.
I do think his parents are AHs though.
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The parents had no right to reveal it to ops parents. They could have gotten her harmed if the fundie parents were crazier. As is, they took her options from her and trapped her into an unwanted pregnancy.
I don't blame the parents either. Honestly, they were probably thinking long term what if the baby stays and we all have to co grandparent. There's a lot of moving parts here. The right thing to do is really hard to figure out. >As a parent, if my child was ever in this situation I’d want my kid to feel safe enough to tell me. Right? I'm thinking how lucky the boyfriend is to have parents he *could* go to. I feel for op.
Yeah, well, his parents, in their infinite wisdom, have betrayed their trust and contributed to taking all their choices away from them and forcing the son who trusted them into unwanted fatherhood. Parents of the year, for sure...
Op can you see a dr without parents? Can you go to a clinic on your own, will boyfriend help?
She’s entitled to speak to her doctor alone even if her parents make the appointment.
Im aware. I meant on a practical level, not a legal one. Ie can she make an appt and get to one easily without them knowing
I just want to make sure she’s aware that she has that option.
I gave birth when I was young and it was a life changing ordeal. It’s not something that adoption will fix. You’ll always remember and know a child of yours is out there. Get an abortion
Where do you live? What state? PM me.
Your boyfriend's parents suck. I'm so sorry. I would never do this to my kids. If you ever need a safe place, r/MomForaMinute is here for you. You can get advice, understanding, love, or just a simple hug.
OP, you don’t even have to go the adoption route if you don’t want to; there are ways to get abortion pills privately and you can always claim miscarriage. You’re not out of options yet. And NTA, I’d feel similarly resentful of my boyfriend if he told without my permission. That might be a dealbreaker for me.
This is the way. Please, pregnancy and adoption will mess you up more than you can imagine if you’re being forced to do it
You can order abortion pills online, unless you’re in Texas. Just tell them you think you’re miscarrying when you’re on the last pill. Otherwise you are going to play what if for the rest of your life.
Also asking you to PM me what state you live in. I know someone who can help if need be.
Hopefully she sees this
Reach out to a family planning clinic as soon as possible. This will not be the first time they've helped someone in your exact circumstance, but the longer you wait, the harder it gets. OP, your parents can make all the plans they like, but your life is yours and yours alone. You are old enough to decide for yourself. If you don't want to be pregnant, it is your right to end it. Period. If lying makes it easier to deal with them, so be it. Tell them you had a miscarriage. Most of all, be kind to yourself. Wishing you the best, hon🫂
You shouldn’t have to risk your life as punishment just because an accident happened, your parents are being cruel.
They can’t force you. Thier politics and religion has no bearing on your options. They will try to control you but only you can let them.
Agreed! You have the right to choose what happens to your body. You can alwasy ask for help if you feel unsafe or at risk of being forced to do something you dont want.
Its also early you could miscarry low-key. Pregnancy has alot of hormones. Breathe. Ask in mom groups for kids your age. Relax and realize alot.
Do not discuss with them. Find a Planned Parenthood if you can.
Contact them online.
Dispite what they'll tell you, this is 100% your choice and they can butt out of it. If you feel an abortion is the best option, then get an abortion. This is your life, not theirs.
Sweetie, get it done without their knowledge. Talk to a doctor alone.
I got an abortion as a minor and my parents never knew. Go to DSHS, they will help you.
It's YOUR body. YOU decide what you do with it. NO ONE else.
It’s not too late. You can get an abortion. I’d rather have my parents freak out and be mad, than carry an unwanted pregnancy to term. YOUR body. NOT theirs.
do what you want sweetheart quite literally fuck them and what they want if you decide on an abortion then that is all that matters the can kiss your ass and you can tell them that to their face.
r/auntienetwork
OP you will never recover from the trauma of giving a baby up for adoption. Pls try to get to a safe haven state and do what is right for you if that means getting an abortion. Don’t let your abusive parents do this to you, and don’t listen to pro life lunatics online!
Wanted to say I think you can talk to someone at your school about getting an advocate of some kind to help you with the adoption process and to somewhat make it where you don’t feel so alone dealing with your parents
No, you can abort as well. It's not their call. Fuck your parents.
Depending on the state in which OP lives, they may not need their parents' permission to end the pregnancy either. They're not required to use insurance coverage or even provide their social security number to medical staff. Unless they are a danger to themselves or others, Federally Qualified Health Centers (which most community clinics are) *are required by law* to maintain confidentiality. They are prohibited from sharing any protected health information regardless of who pays for the visit. For minors 13 years of age or older, staff cannot talk to anyone about the minor patient's medical record without their written consent. Particularly when it comes to sexual health/STIs/pregnancy, substance use, and behavioral health Depending on how far along OP is, they may still be able to get a prescription to abort. As long as they can get to a family planning clinic and arrange after care or at least transport to a medical center in case something goes wrong while they recuperate, then that's all that matters for now
Look up Auntie Network. You don't need to tell your parents jack shit. You can go to planned parenthood without them, get the combination pill, then tell tjem you miscarried. Which isn't a lie, that's what the pill does. Induces a miscarriage.
I have the pill at home that I’m willing to ship out tomorrow. I panic bought after the last SCOTUS ruling and it’s nearing its expiration date. You just need to find a way to receive it. PM me OP.
Should PM OP directly.
I did.
OK, good. Get your cape out, because you sounds like an unsung hero, mate.
Doesn't happen very often, but you have restored a tiny bit of my faith in humanity. Good job! The idea that a condom split can lead to someone having to forcibly give birth and being burdened with raising a child for the next couple of decades is like something out of the scariest horror movie to me. For a nation so obsessed with sex, its so weird that you've turned sex into a more stressful game of Russian Roulette. "Land of the free"? What freedoms are people so happy with when you can't just enjoy a nice (consentual) shag without fear it will wreck your whole life...
It’s so gross, and yes when you add in the consequences of pregnancy on the human body it’s an actual horror show.
https://www.reddit.com/r/auntienetwork/s/zvGLp9mFmX
This. 👆. It's YOUR life. You can wait to be angry with your bf until later. Enlist a good friend who can keep her mouth shut to help you. Your bf has proven that's not in his skillset.
This, this is the way OP. Get it done & pretend it’s a miscarriage. Do not ruin your life..
This is a bummer-- from r/auntienetwork: "Because of legal issues with parental rights, we cannot assist minors, but we do have two resources that can help." And then they direct you to Planned Parenthood.
Oh I would never assist a minor in getting an abortion. But I am available for a quick tour of my closest big city and happy to accommodate any sleepovers for traveling young women! I usually love loooong trips to the mall in the big city, so if my guest used that time to do something else while I shopped, I would totally understand.
I like it. I rather hope that they have to say things like this for legal reasons and if contacted by OP, they might help her enjoy some sightseeing.
That's what it's all about!
HAPPY CAKE DAY!! I got you some BUBBLE WRAP!! POP away!! >!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Happy Cake Day!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Happy Cake Day!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<>!Pop!!<
That's curiously satisfying. Almost as good as real bubble wrap.
Aidaccess.com
Pleas please see this OP. You don’t have to get their permission. It’s your life and your body and your choice
This is the best advice and I would highly recommended you try this. Find the nearest clinic.
Agreed, OP should explore all options available to her without feeling pressured into decisions she's not comfortable with.
Get an abortion anyway and tell everyone - INCLUDING your boyfriend who can’t keep his mouth shut - that it was a miscarriage. Don’t let them ruin your life.
Op. Please get in touch with Auntie Network on Reddit. I posted this earlier. Your parents forcing you to give birth and be a teen mom doesn't seem to take into consideration what their actual daughter wants. 15 is too young to have a child. Fight for yourself and your rights!
https://www.reddit.com/r/auntienetwork/s/nFUpyPjroz
Auntie network says "sorry minors" go to PP. (WHICH DOESN'T GET YOU AN ABORTION where I live. Or any kind of path to one)
Can you go to a state nearby that does with a trusted supportive adult?
Find out if his parents will take you in when you get kicked out. Then go get your abortion! They don’t he to steal your life. Run.
I thought about that, but given how they went behind OP's back to tell her parents, I don't think they'd be the supportive adults she needs. I mean, they didn't even give her the grace of saying "you need to tell your parents", they straight up ambushed her.
Totally fair. They may now see that her parents are religious nuts and be willing to help seeing as her parents won’t help her.
I think they also wanted to keep the baby, and just pretend to be supportive about the abortion
Yeah, everyone here is horrible except OP 😭 Also, happy cake day!!
Being a first time mom at 27 and experiencing how exhausting and life altering it is to raise a baby I feel for you so much. This is not fair to you in any way. Raising a baby is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do in my life even with all the help and support I have I couldn’t imagine doing this as a teenager. Take your life in your hands OP get the abortion pill, tell everyone you miscarried and go to therapy because everything you’re going through and will continue to go through even after the abortion is so difficult
Same. I'm 29 with a much planned for and wanted pregnancy. It's so hard! I can't imagine being forced to go through this much less at 15. Definitely not fair or right. Poor OP. I hope she can figure out a solution that works for her, and gets the therapy and help she needs.
TIL how to block people on Reddit. Jfc, let this poor girl live without religious judgement from a self righteous stranger.
I don’t think it’s supportive that a) your bf told his parents or b) that they went against your wishes and told your parents knowing full well that they would force you into having the baby. I hope you find your way to what’s best for you.
The boyfriend isn't the problem. He had every right to tell his parents seeing as its his kid too but his parents are not supportive. They pushed there own agenda on her and their son.
I disagree. Either he agreed with abortion and jeopardized her ability to get one by telling his parents against her wishes and without consent or warning or he disagreed with the abortion and told his parents to prevent her from getting one. Either way, his unilateral decision about their mutual problem led to the exact outcome OP has been sick over since she found out she was pregnant. Whether or not it was his right to share that information, he betrayed her and she'll be the one to suffer the most for it. He may not have done it with ill intent, but he has caused her serious harm. Abortion would be unforgivable to her parents. They might even blame her for a miscarriage. Childbirth can be traumatic and life altering, life ending even. I doubt parents like hers will ever let her forget even if she had the baby adopted out. Regardless, everyone will see her pregnant and know, which can take a big emotional toll on a person and she's already struggling. This would be unforgivable for me. I feel really sorry for OP and I'm hoping she gets the best possible outcome despite the cards she's been dealt.
Check out the resources in r/abortion (there are some good links in the sticky post at the top). You can make a post there, tell them your approximate location (down to the state/province) and your age, and they can help you further. You may be able to do this easily and without anyone's permission.
I'm so heartbroken for you. In any outcome it's going to be hard. Whether you keep the baby, put it up for adoption or try to abort on the sly. Since your BFs parents are supportive is there any way they would order abortion pills and have them sent to their house? You could possibly take them and tell your parents you had a miscarriage? This is a very scary time for you. BUT you do have a support system in place. And that's great! I can't give you any direction. All I can do is wish for a peaceful mind to come for you.
If you do decide to get an abortion and can somehow do so, tell them you had a miscarriage.
If you have questions about whether you can get an abortion without involving your parent, if you would like help navigating the judicial bypass process, or if you don’t have your parents in your life and want to understand your options, you can contact the If/When/How Judicial Bypass Helpline by calling 844-868-2812 or submitting a request online. You’re not alone. If you’re pregnant and want to have an abortion, contact your nearest Planned Parenthood health center as soon as possible. They can help explain the laws in your state, let you know what your options are, and help you talk with your parents. You can also visit AbortionFinder.org.
This must be terrifying. As others have suggested, there are ways to abort the embryo without your parents consent. I would contact these people: [https://aidaccess.org/en/](https://aidaccess.org/en/) They are legit, and helped me once. They might even be able to help with the fee. DM me if you need to talk.
Happy Cake Day!!! 🎂
If it’s early enough you can do a medication abortion and it will be exactly like a miscarriage. Even if they make you go to the doctor they can’t tell the difference.
Go to abuzz health dot com. You enter the amount you can/are willing to pay, and they will mail Plan C pills to you. You can have it sent to your boyfriend’s house or somewhere else you trust. This is your choice. Your parents don’t have the right to block your access to reproductive care. You might have to sneak to get what you want, but you don’t need their permission to get an abortion.
NOT THE BF’s house. A trusted friend. The BF isn’t reliable.
this is actually evil. please, PLEASE use the resources people are giving you and try to get one anyways.
Have the abortion and tell them you miscarried. You can have the pills mailed to you (or to a friend, if your parents go through your mail). You are miserable about this and children should be wanted and cared for by someone who wasn't forced to give birth. You have terrible parents, I'm sorry to say.
1. Break up with your boyfriend. You don’t tell him anything. 2. You mentioned saving up for an abortion. If abortion is legal where you are, there may be financial aid available *that you don’t have to pay back*. This is especially true for the United States, and there are even funds for you to travel to obtain an abortion. 3. There are Auntie networks to help give you a place to stay, a car to ride in, etc. to get you where you need to go. Keep saving up for your abortion. If you can’t trust your friends but you’re able to drive, your abortion clinic can help you find resources to get this done. If it’s early, you will likely have to take 2 pills on separate days rather than just 1 pill. Take the first pill, stay overnight, take the next pill, go home and pretend you’re miscarrying. Once you have your plan **DELETE YOUR INTERNET HISTORY**. Delete your apps. Delete this post. Delete this account. Good luck.
You have choices. You just need to find resources, quickly. Don't worry, right now, about feeling like the asshole, or resenting your boyfriend. Put all that aside for a sec, and find a trusted support network to help you figure out your options. Someone mentioned some subreddits here, that's a start.
Aidaccess.org. plancpills.org. laslibres.org. three sources for cheap or free abortion pills. Tell your parents you are miscarrying. No way that anyone can tell you took the pills. How horrible, for them to force you to bear a child. You do not have to obey them!
Not wrong Please read the comments and find help from someone to get the abortion pills. Please don't go through with the pregnancy and don't tell your ex boyfriend, he is a jerk. You deserve control over your body and its nobody's else decision. ******Update us
NTA. You can get an abortion. Then tell them you've a miscarriage. You need to get it done ASAP so that the cost doesn't escalate. A 6 week old abortion is not similar to a 19 week old abortion. In some places, it's illegal to abort a 20 week old fetus. You need to make a decision fast. Just go to a clinic. Preferably a government clinic. Don't DIY. If you give up a child for adoption, the child will hunt you down years later. This is human nature.
Well your bf and his parents aren't trust worthy. Make they can get you to a clinic? Have an abortion and just tell your parents you miscarriage
Pardon me for a few minutes while I'm completely blunt. You don't owe anyone a baby & they can't force you to keep it. You do have more power than you think because there are resources to help you. You just have to get tough & take some potential risks. I say this with perfect love for my fellow human & zero judgment. You may want to figure out an escape plan & cut these people off. They are not acting in your best interest. There are shelters designed for situations like that & it sounds like time for you to flee & be rescued. I hope you can find courage to do whatever is right for you. My best wishes to you.
It is your life. You should be able to decide on your own with the father. If you need to not carry this child then you can make that happen. Having a raising a child will severely affect your future. If that is something you want then great but if it is not you should be able to choose. I am a Christian who feels like all the options can work so pick the one that works best for you. Adoption is a wonderful thing, being a mom is too but if you can’t do those things let it go.
Fuck your boyfriend (idiot), fuck his parents, and fuck your parents. ONLY YOU are in charge of YOUR body. This is going to be tough, but this is your time to make the choice for yourself. There are networks to help you. Don’t give into their pressure. Leave if you have to. Very sorry love.
You shouldn't be forced to go through motherhood against your will. Talk to a doctor.
Abortion bills can be obtained: [Plan C](https://www.plancpills.org/) [AidAccess](https://aidaccess.org/en/) [Women on web](https://www.womenonweb.org/en/)
Well you need the abortion and to dump your asshole boyfriend who went behind you back and blabbed. It's clear he cannot be trusted with sensitive information. Just get the abortion, there is no guarantee the kid will be adopted and there is no reason to put your body through that.
Depending on the state you live in, you can go to Planned Parenthood and get abortion pills without their permission. It’ll look like a miscarriage, just be careful to dispose of the packaging somewhere they won’t find it. If they take you to a hospital, there’s no way for them to know either.
Your parents don’t have a say in what goes in or out of your vagina. Giving birth is a dangerous thing, especially when you’re young. Don’t let them force you into making a decision that you will regret.
Get the abortion no one should ever make someone go through a pregnancy they do not want. Pregnancy and birth have risks of complications, issues, illnesses etc, imagine something happened to you during pregnancy or the birth that sticks with you for the rest of your life let alone going through with a pregnancy and birth you absolutely didn’t want. Its very shitty that your boyfriend told his parents. Your parents telling you that you have to proceed with the birth and keep the child is not fair on you at all. Everyone has the right to bodily autonomy and they should all respect that and your choices. It is ultimately your decision regardless if anyone supports or helps you. I’m so sorry you’re going through this but please by any means do not let them force you to do something so major against your will.
Your bf is a fucking peice of garbage. And he baby trapped you. He shouldn't have told on you like a little bitch. I'm so sorry and this is a nightmare. You have to practice safe sex!
https://www.abortionfinder.org/
Get an abortion and tell everyone you miscarriaged. Is your life. Not their life. Your parents are selfish.
Listen, I am not entirely sure where you live so I don’t know the laws regarding abortion. However, if you do and you are allowed to get an abortion without your parental consent: do it. I can tell keeping the baby is horrifying to you beyond belief - and I can safely say having a baby at your age before you could even START your life is going to be extremely difficult and something a lot of people would not want to go through with. Your bf’s parents going behind your back and telling your parents is terrible - you are getting robbed from your decision; a life changing one at that. So listen to me carefully: if you really don’t want to, please go to a clinic and figure out your options (WITHOUT YOUR PARENTS). They are not supportive of you - they are forcing you. You are allowed to make a decision that will affect YOU for the rest of your life, not them. Then don’t tell them, unless you know they will accept your decision over time, tell them you had a miscarriage. It is better to lie in situations like this while you still have to rely on them - because this is YOUR life and you need to prioritize yourself and your happiness not the mindset of your parents.
Your parents have no right to ruin your life. Get the abortion anyways.
I hate the boyfriend and I hate the boyfriend’s parents right now. They, truly, don’t understand that some people are shitty. That there is no “talking it out” with those kinds of self-righteous, religious, assholes. They better step the fuck up for their grandchild’s mother because *her parents?* Are going to destroy her life.
The boyfriend did this on purpose. He’s not the one who’s suffering, she is. I hope she breaks up with him permanently
Not sure where you are, but...terminate & tell everyone you miscarried. How are they gonna actually know?
They can’t make you keep it, it’s not their body. If abortion is legal where you live, go to a free clinic for correct and up to date advice on what your options are.
If you want an abortion, find a way to get one. You can tell them you miscarried. It will be more difficult, but not impossible. I would say get your boyfriend to save faster but his confession has put you in this situation, and he may not be a safe person to share information with.
You don't need their permission to do an abortion Just go to the clinic and afterwards tell your parents you lost the baby if you don't want to tell the truth
Run
Is there a planned parenthood within driving distance?
https://www.plancpills.org/ will mail you the pills.
OP I was in your shoes. Find a clinic to talk with someone. You need someone to talk to who is knowledgeable to educate you. You need to look at your future.
The most important thing to remember is that this problem doesn't have to be the end for you. There are options. It's okay to feel upset, hurt, depressed, anxious, or any other emotion - but if you start having thoughts of suicide, call a crisis help line immediately (I'm guessing you're in the US, and I have no idea what crisis lines are available there sorry - other people in this thread would be able to help). The options are still absolutely yours and yours alone. If you believe an abortion is the best option for you, speak to a family planning clinic and get their help. Don't include your parents. Don't include your boyfriend. Don't include your boyfriend's parents. If you have a friend you can trust, get them to help you though it.
You can get abortion pills before 9 weeks and they'll never know you didn't miscarry.
OP, it is in your right to feel resentful of your bf. I know I would too if I were in this situation. If adoption is available, then take it. Don’t look back on your choice if you don’t want the baby. If you were worried about this to begin with, then there’s a HUGE chance you are going to resent your baby for its whole life. Don’t give up. Or, you can ask your boyfriend’s parents to secretly take you to Planned Parenthood and get it done. Maybe stay with them when your parents find out? Stay with a friend who would be willing to drive you there, help you find a doctor, anything under the sun that can help you spare this baby and yourself from a nightmare of a lifetime being under your parents’ thumb.
Your parents are talking about adoption but deep down you’re depressed because you know they will make you keep the baby and will make you raise it. You need a boyfriend and ask him why he told the parents and if you were forced to raise his baby then he will be there every step of the way because part of it is his fault
My suggestion to you is to have another family meeting (both families) and explain your feelings/thoughts without hesitation. Why you feel that abortion is the option. Talk things through. Ask them what happens when you want to go to college? What if you & bf break up? Babysitting? Just throw ALL scenarios out there and if you do keep the baby.
Im sorry that they involved yr parents. Will the boys parents take you to the clinic to have an abortion? Maybe they can pay for it and you can work a plan to pay half back. You can reach out to planned parenthood and other places but you must move fast. Dont sit on this. Dont let your parents bully you or lock you in the house against yr will. When its over and youre recovering make sure to get another type birth control. But do something soon. Be proactive.
Can you get any abortion pills? Take them & claim miscarriage.
If want the abortion then do it and tell no one. Tell them you miscarried.
you must get an abortion without anyone knowing none of those parents, and not your bf. leave home asap find good hearted people to host you, and don't return home before the abortion is done. PS. there might be legal complexities here. you might be a minor legally. leaving home might mean they'll get the police to track you and return you home by force. so anyone helping you might also have legal issues so check the law. look up for your options. get the abortion done as fast as humanely possible. why delay will cause more crap
Fuck it, go get an abortion and just tell your parents it was a miscarriage
Contact Planned Parenthood nearest to where you live. They can advise you on your options. In some states, you can have an abortion without your parents knowledge or consent if you are 16. Contact them today to get the information you need to make the decision that will serve you best. THAT WILL SERVE YOU BEST. NOT YOUR PARENTS. NOT YOUR BOYFRIEND'S PARENTS. YOU.
You should feel betrayed because your boyfriend violated your trust and his parents set up a meeting without your knowledge was 100% disgusting and wrong. If you don’t want the child you shouldn’t keep it especially because you want a different future. If your parents don’t suppose you, oh well. Ditch that boyfriend and tell everyone you lost the baby. This post honestly made me mad and sad at the same time.
You’re not wrong it’s your life, me and my gf found these abortion pills online and they worked for her. Said she was cramping bad but it wasn’t horrible. I would gladly send you the link if you want it.
Benjamin Franklins autobiography had a recipe to coax ones missing period. There's several options of herbal teas that would cause an abortion. You do not have to have a baby you don't want just because your parents are trying to force you to do so. Get that nonsense out of your head and fight back. That is your body and you are in control of it. 😳
Get an abortion and tell parents you miscarried.
Vote Blue down ballot.
NTA. You trusted him and he broke your trust. His parents going to yours shows his whole family cannot be trusted where you are concerned. Worse, your parents are bullies. You need to decide for yourself. Don't let anyone force you to do anything you aren't totally comfortable with. I'm sorry you aren't getting the support you need and deserve.
Don’t tell your boyfriend or his parents. They have already betrayed you once.
You abort and say miscarriage. Tell no one, maybe only a close gf. Your man ain’t it
Are there any normal non-biased people here. No abortion is not evil and children shouldn't raise children. The Boyfriends only mistake was to trust his parents. He is young and clueless... If both were mature they wouldn't be in that situation. There is no evil intent from him. He also needed help to solve the Situation cause he is way to young to find a solution for himself. His parents tho should have asked for your consent before telling your parents. For all it is worth the boy acted responsible once in his life.
Your boyfriend stole your autonomy from you. Not cool. What state are you in?
Are you legally old enough to get an abortion on your own? I would go to Planned Parenthood if there is one near you. It is not your parents’ choice to make.
Have an abortion and tell them you miscarried, I know two young women that had circumstances similar to yours, both of them were promised support when the child came. Neither of them got it. Do what's best for you
I'm sorry all the adults are failing you. You do NOT need their permission to get an abortion. Call Planned Parenthood.
Well what I predicted happened much much sooner. This really sucks because now what you didn’t want happening, is and your boyfriend is away from the issue as it is you that’s going to be the one carrying that baby. I know he must think it was the best thing to do but he really fucked up with not coming to you first. NTA again.
God, I knew it would be a bad idea to tell his parents. I just knew they would tell your parents. What a disaster.
NTA and they can not force you to keep the baby! Call your local planned parenthood for help and do not tell your parents and get this taken care of
Get the abortion but tell your parents it was a miscarriage
Depending on your state you can get the abortion pill over the counter. Or have someone get it for you. You can say you miscarried. No one should make you have a baby you don’t want.
If you go through with an abortion tell everyone it was stressed induced by everyone’s actions.
I am a big believer in my body, my choice. Now it’s not something I could ever do but I have help many hand so far people I love very much as they went through this. There is no waiter answer her but it is not up to your parents where you go from here. But and this may be harsh, unfortunately you plaid like a grown up and now you have a very grown up situation to figure out. I wish you the best and pray you make a decision you can live with for the rest of your life, adoption is always a great idea but again it’s a hard road. Whatever you decide make sure to find a good support system. People who will be there no matter what direction you take with this.
Get the abortion anyway! Tell them you miscarried. It happens all the time.
Just abort, let us know what country your in so we can help!
I’m not sure where you are but here in California you can order abortion pills online not sure how much they are or if they take insurance, but you could always do this secretly and just tell everyone you’re having a miscarriage
It’s your baby not your parents. Do what is right for you.
Good lord parents shouldn’t be allowed to force their child to be an incubator…..
Get a hold of the abortion pills. Don’t leave any packaging around. Do it right now before it’s too late. You’re very quickly running out of time. Your parents do not have your best interests at heart. Do not ever tell them. Go to college and move on.
There's otc supplements that can induce miscarriage, not that I'm recommending that or anything
i am so sorry this is happening. i have tips to help you naturally miscarry, but it depends on how many weeks you are: caffiene (200mg or more daily), vitamin c (especially orange juice), mugwort tea, pomegranate seeds, hot bath. i'm trying to find more ways as i'm typing. if you do any of these, be very careful, as i don't want your own health at risk or your parents being absolute c--ts over it. i know these from experience.
Your Parents cannot “ Force “ you to keep an unwanted pregnancy. Make your appointment for your termination & just go. None of the medical staff can or would say anything to any one. Tell the counsellor you’re being pressured to keep it when that’s not what you want. Your Body. Your Life. Your Decision.
In some states, you don’t need parental consent to get an abortion. Don’t let your parents bully you on this. Do what is right for you.
Have a “miscarriage.” The Auntie Network is here for you
NTA. But if you can find a way to get an abortion secretly, you can say you miscarried. There’s no way to tell the difference. Don’t tell your bf.
In most states you can legally get an abortion without your parents consent, and all states you can buy a plane ticket to get you to a state where you don’t need your parents consent.
Call child protective services. Your parents are abusing you, and you need help. You must get that abortion.
You're able to request to talk to thr doctors alone. If you feel like giving the baby up for adoption is the best choice, then it's the best choice! You're parents cannot force you to raise a child You're not ready for. At ANY point, request to talk to a doctor alone and get advice on how to put the baby up for adoption and tell them your situation
Please please please use the resources others have suggested for you. Your parents should not have a right to force you to give birth, it’s barbaric. Really no one should be forced to give birth but you’re a child, and not ready for a child. I hope you can find some help, I was hoping for a better outcome for you.
Where do you live? I know in my state at age 15, a teenager has full control over their medical and has to agree to even let their parents know things. I know some states that a pregnant teenager becomes medically independent. I know it feels hopeless, but do some research for where you live and please, please, please reach out to the subreddit I sent you in pm. They can help.
Check your local laws, some states will allow you to terminate as a minor without your parents knowing anything at all about it. This should be your choice and no one elses/
You need to talk to a doctor. ALONE. Tell them you do not want your parents to know anything you talk about.
You are not wrong. What state are you in Op?
If you’re in the US they can’t currently make you do anything (sorry, depending on state now) You need a medical professional on your side though.
Try to go to the doctor alone, look up support services online. I'm sorry this is happening, you have a lot more rights pregnant if you can find help. I hope you are able to put this baby up for adoption or get away, try and talk to his parents about helping you with your rights. In the US at least some states have extra protection and help for pregnant teens.
The people in your life aren’t looking out for your best interests. The way that your boyfriend (telling his parents), his parents (telling your parents), and your parents (denying your bodily autonomy) are behaving now is how you can expect them to behave in the future. If you have to have the child, they will continue to prioritize their interests over your own, including pressuring you to keep/give up the baby, pressuring you to adopt dietary/lifestyle changes that they believe in, pressuring you to make medical decisions they want, pressuring you to give birth the way they want, etc. And it will only get worse if you keep the baby. You can be sure they will all have loud opinions on what you should be doing and how you should be doing it, but you cannot trust them to support you or help you. You cannot trust these people to look out for you. You are not an incubator. You are not an empty vessel. You are a human deserving of respect and human rights. You need to look out for yourself, even if your needs conflict with their wants. If you need to use secretive methods to end the pregnancy, that is a valid course of action. ❤️
Oh dear! I just saw this honey, and I’m so sorry that I was right that he would tell. Dammit! I’d still get some counseling to help you deal with this situation and check out your rights for your state on being forced into this. They should not force you and it may be against the law.
Your boyfriend and his parents suck so much
I hope that he’s an ex after he violated something that was supposed to be confidential.
Girl, it's your body. Just point out that you will either leave the baby with them or put it up for adoption. Idc what anyone says, your boyfriend's a dumbass.
Please make sure you attend your Dr appts alone so you can talk to them alone. Tell them that your parents are forcing you to have this child against your will.
your an adult so they cant force you to keep this baby, while im against abortion i do see you have the rest of your life to have kids so its your decision not theres, as for your BF you should tell him he broke your trust and your done with him as this is your body and he has no say in what you do neither does his parents and if they dont like it tough, if your family are physically forcing you get police involved,
His parent's being supportive my butt. Backstabbers.
[r/auntienetwork](https://www.reddit.com/r/auntienetwork/) Please get help....Having this baby will eff you up for life. I was in your shoes when I was your age. I DO NOT, and never have, regretted MY decision to have an abortion. It is YOUR decision, not your parents. What state are you in?
When I was young…. Many moons ago, a friend of mine became pregnant at 15, but was only a week or so from turning 16. Our state required parent permission for an abortion if you were under 18. The neighboring state did not require permission if you were 16. So, as soon as she turned 16, we packed her into a car and drove to the neighboring state where she terminated the pregnancy. Best decision. I’m not sure where you are, but you need to make the best decision for you. You are not TA for feeling resentful. Your boyfriend is not the one who has to go through pregnancy and childbirth.
Your bfs parents failed you. They should be ashamed. I'm so sorry