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The number of woman who have things written on their dating profiles along the lines of “must be someone who brushes their teeth” is pretty impressive.
Sometimes there are underlying psychological issues that cause people to avoid routines like brushing their teeth or flossing. For example it has been shown that people with ADHD have a 12 times higher risk of getting tooth decay.
I was unfortunately undiagnosed until 30. Have had 4 fillings in my childhood.
Studies show that some people suffering from depression also have problems with dental hygiene, in extreme cases leading to dental pain and tooth loss. It's a vicious cycle as poor oral health will also make mental health worse. People will get embarrassed about their teeth and find it hard to eat or drink in social situations. That causes avoidance of social settings and potentially causes development of social anxiety on top. Lack of oral hygiene might also cause problems in relationships or prevent them from finding a partner in the first place. All these issues lead to increased depression which worsens oral hygiene even more.
Edit: I just found out, victims of sexual abuse may develop poor dental care, as well.
Let us also consider that some people do not have the privilege of having good parents that taught them the importance of oral hygiene.
Duuuude, that's crazy I'm 29 and just started medicine for adhd and I have shaved daily weekly haircuts and brush twice a day and floss. I would only get a haircut like once every six months. My face looks like a homeless person, and my mustach would be on my lips all the time. My wife has definitely appreciated the new self care. Although I did always shower once or twice a day and wash really well, I was definitely capable of doing better. I'm so glad I took the medicine. I feel like a new man.
I have been with more than one man where I found poop smashed in his ball hair when I was going down on him.
*No, I didn’t continue having sex of any kind.*
First: The actual fuck!? I don't get how guys refuse to wash, let alone manage to attract anyone while I struggle.
Second: The actual fuck? Why do you make it sound like you kept going through with it!?
When they obviously have some shit to prove and posture constantly. Many men think this is like some subtle way to build themselves up in front of women when really it just makes everyone think you’re an ass.
I'll add to this the men that constantly mock or talk down to others. They can't build themselves up, so they try to knock everyone else down. There's a guy I used to work with like this (he also postures constantly) and he is ALWAYS single. Women can't stand being around him.
It essentially means displaying yourself/ showing off to make yourself seem bigger, more important, or better. It generally has a negative connotation, like you're insecure and overcompensating or acting aggressively.
It's not necessarily a physical thing, like actual *posture.* It's definition is "behavior that is intended to impress or mislead."
So, driving a car you can't afford, or pretending to be knowledgeable about something you aren't.
Men who constantly start fights and can’t finish them is the biggest turn off. My ex was like that, the amount of fights he’d start for no reason was insane.
That’s why I was so attracted to my fiancé when we first met, he was nothing but stoic, but when he needed to step up he finished that fight very quickly.
My abusive ex would do this. He’d pick fights with people or use protecting me/“defending my honor” as an excuse to beat the shit out of someone. Once i got shoved by a guy and my ex grabbed the guy by the neck a d body slammed him down onto the curb, and then proceeded to tell everyone about it for weeks later on. Shit scared me, and he’d punch walls and break things when we got in arguments. And every argument was started by me trying to express my feelings about how he treated me and he’d gaslight the shit out of me.
I hope he’s homeless in a ditch missing appendages, balding with dysentery.
Yeah you try to address all of this and then he steam rolls you bellowing in your face about how you’re not letting him “express himself” and your invalidating him, and your monopolizing the conversation. Or is that just my ex lol.
But for real, my ex would not pick fights with random people but he would pick fights with me constantly. He had nothing but the purest addiction to conflict. Made him seem weak and pathetic. My pity killed any sexual desire.
Stating they’re an “alpha male” and calling other men “betas.”
You’re not special bro. Nobody is gonna see you and think “oh he’s so cool.” You’re just a loser, don’t berate or put other men down that you deem inferior, it makes you look insecure.
I saw the best comment on “alpha” males. It treated them like software- yes alpha, untested, full of problems and not suitable for public consumption yet.
This statement is completely true. People who tell me "I'm really funny, everyone loves my sense of humor." have none. People who say "I'm really smart, you don't have to explain anything to me." Explain in more detail.
I have a friend like this. Perpetually single. "I don't want them to change me." Bro, she asked you to be emotionally more available and talk through conflict , not to give up your hopes, dreams and hobbies.
This is a big one. There are guys that see women as being a single entity. They also tend to blame women for all their problems. Some of them are those red-pilled losers that think women should only be housewives for the benefit of society
Right. Universal statements like "women are..." or "the trick to women..", spoken by a man who isn't even with a woman (or even a man that is). Sure, there's a lot of commonality across the spectrum of women. But there are very few universals, and if your mindset is based on understanding another person based on some supposed universal rules, you're not going to be good at relationship regardless of whether your presumptions are accurate (and they probably aren't.)
Men tend to be good at figuring out predictable systems, like machines and software. Women aren't that.
Critiquing actual supermodels and Hollywood starlets for the tiniest physical imperfections while simultaneously being a fat pasty unwashed slovenly unemployed loser with zero personality or life goals outside of gaming
Sorry reddit
Some guy called Sydney Sweeney “barely attractive with a common face” or something similar when I was discussing White Lotus. Like damn, I’m a literal troll then I guess.
I knew a guy who insisted repeatedly that Britney Spears was “too fat” for him, that he would NEVER bang her (as if she would offer?). Meanwhile his (perfectly fine and not fat) girlfriend was “fatter” (again, she was not overweight, just a normal healthy size) than Britney Spears and he obviously had no issue having sex with her.
People are dumb.
Imo, those opinions seem to only come up once men discuss the “fuckability” of unreachable women. See how a man will swoon over a woman but once she says she isn’t interested she’s a fat cow that no one wants to even touch with a ten foot pole. And an attractive, successful woman who is charismatic and talented is the ultimate threat to a socially awkward man with self esteem issues. If she is out of his league, she’s shit and ugly anyway.
I feel like those guys work themselves up to a rage lather in their own heads. Like, *”Brittney Spears is hot, but she would never sleep with me. Whatever, like I care. I bet she thinks she’s hot shit, what a bitch. I wouldn’t even sleep with her she’s just a fat ugly cow!”*
Probably one of those guys who'd have a conversation that goes like this on dating apps:
* Him: wow ur super hot.
* Her: thanks but i'm not interested
* Him: good you're ugly and fat anyway
I remember some random idiot commenting on a Shakira music video saying she looks haggard and old. Not only is this not true, the comment was from 10 years ago so it really wasn’t true.
Geez. Man can you even imagine having Shakira for a wife? It's not even that she's damn hot, she seems like such a powder keg of personality and traits in all the best ways.
You described my friend who's in their 40's, had one gf in their 20s, complete neckbeard, and still living with his parents. I laughed hard when I read your description. I tried to help but he won't change.
Yup. Beggars are not choosers. Got a friend like that who would constantly criticize the female profiles he sees on dating app while himself is very far from being a Chad. Oh yeah, he had no date the past 4 years either...
I went out with a guy like this. We texted back and forth for a few weeks and got along really great, I really liked him overall until our first date. He spent most of our first date trashing his past dates - one girl’s arms were too hairy, another girl’s nose was too big. He was very surprised I didn’t accept a second date.
I had a similar friend. Not handsome by any stretch but musically talented. He wouldnt consider dating anyone that wasn’t super model material. Around 30 years of age he somehow hooked up with a girl next door type. Friends were really surprised he made out that well. Of course, he starts criticizing her looks, weight, intellect etc. It was awful to witness. She dumped him and our hero didn’t ever get another date (not one) and died single, and tragically, in his mid-50s.
It makes me wonder if some guys like that are just in the closet. They make up impossible expectations because they don’t know why they can never find a woman they’re attracted to.
Yeah it's definitely not limited to famous people, you see it happen with servers, clerks, women just walking down the street minding their own business, etc. I used celebs as the gold standard of conventional beauty purely for illustrative purposes, but it absolutely isn't exclusive to them.
Insulting other guys, including friends, when a new woman comes around to try and look superior.
I had a married guy friend that would do this constantly. We no longer speak.
I've seen a lot of screenshots of dating profiles where the whole profile is "why are all the girls on here liars/sluts/gold diggers/other insult?" Bruh, you need to get that attitude sorted out. And somehow they can't undedstand why they can't find a woman interested in them?? If you use your first impression to let everyone know you're judgemental AND whiny, of course dating is going to be hard for you!
Please don’t let them know this. Us women appreciate that this is on their profile up front. Actually, when I see stuff like that, like major red flags on a dating profile, I’ve started to actually block them instead of just swiping left just in case they remove the offensive bullshit and I end up on a date with them someday.
Or an offensive opposite. Loudly going on about how they would "do her/hit that/shag/oh hell yeah" whenever celebrity women are mentioned. Yeah, bud, I'm sure she'll be thrilled to know that you've bestowed such a high complement upon her and will be knocking at your door in about an hour. That should give you enough time to get the crusted poop out of your ball hair before she gets there...
If someone is bitter that they dont get any dates and that turns into open verbal anger and animosity toward women, then their chances, which were already pretty low, plunge to close to zero.
When they are overly nice to woman that they want to pick up, like - saying what he thinks she wants to hear, paying extreme attention, pretending to be a feminist etc. It's smells like mix of desperation, scam, is creepy and everyone with basic soft skills can spot it:)
And usually they’re not so nice to women they’re not interested in. I don’t know why they think a woman would be interested in them when they’re nice to her but shitty to her friends.
Woman here and you’re on the nose. Personally, I can usually tell when a man is modifying his personality or lying about his hobbies/interests so it seems like he has more in common with me. It is a massive turn off and makes me think he’ll lie about anything just to get sex.
Jeremy from Peep Show is a good, albeit slightly cartoonish, example of this type of behaviour. Nothing turns me off more than someone just blindly agreeing with what I say so I’ll like them. It’s NPC behaviour.
I cringe thinking back to my teens when I was overly clingy and needy. I was so enthusiastically brown-nosing girls i was interested in. It was pathetic.
No need to cringe about it. At least you were being friendly to those girls instead of negging them or bullying them like some teenagers do. A lot of us do cringey shit during our teen years so you don’t have to feel bad about it, as long as you’ve learned from it!
Nice is a characteristic based on a behavior. Good is a characteristic based on an intention.
Most good people are usually nice, but not all nice people are necessarily good.
Being really offended by things that occur naturally on women’s bodies like stretch marks, cellulite, sagging, body hair, etc. No woman will ever fit their idea of what physical perfection looks like. These dudes tend to put in a ton of effort towards their physical appearance (gym, grooming, etc) while completely neglecting their mental and emotional well-being.
I’ll add: dudes who are (or act) viscerally disgusted/offended by periods, or even the *mere mention* of periods. Like how are you going to act borderline *scared* of a natural bodily process? That’s such pussy shit.
The woman is the one who actually has to suffer through the pain, inconvenience, embarrassment, significant financial cost, etc., of bleeding out their genitals and getting hormone blasted - and they have to do this for a week out of every single month, every single year, for decades. Basically 20-25% of their ***entire life***. Yet not only can these men not be bothered to help her out with it or even talk about it, they actively make the woman feel disgusting about a natural and essential bodily process? Shows a complete lack of empathy, awareness, and an attitude of willful ignorance.
Ironically, these are likely the same men who view women as little more than baby factories.
Big agree. I was fortunate enough that my high school girlfriend explained to me how everything worked and showed me probably a lot more than many young girls would be comfortable with during those years. As a result, I never looked at any process a woman has to go through as "gross" or "disgusting", it's just nature doing its thing. Any time I've heard a guy get all "That's gross! Nasty!" I've called them out for it. No reason for the dumbass insecure attitude.
I mean, it is gross, it's blood and stuff. But is it grosser than taking a shit? It happens. Grow the fuck up and get on with your day. You're an adult. Stop acting like a 9 year old or a Levitical priest.
I remember reading a thread somewhere on Reddit about a woman who had just delivered twins and her husband left to go stay at his friend’s house because “he couldn’t look at her the same way when she pooped on the table during labor—it traumatized him and made her unattractive to him.” Meanwhile she’s stuck taking care of newborn twins alone. Still hoping it was made up.
I’ll never forget my (very awesome) ex husband cleaning up the murder scene I produced after our second daughters delivery. Total champ and completely unfazed. I was horrified but his calm reaction made me feel so at ease, especially after such a life and body altering experience
It should almost be like a drivers test: can you handle this? Okay then, you get a parenting license
As a dude I can tell you it’s astonishing the number of dudes who have this sort of attitude while not even putting effort into their physical appearance.
I'm kind of lucky in that I keep my pussy hairy, and it does seem to keep a lot of assholes away from me. 😂
I still get the occasional Bro who tells me, "I'll only fuck you if you shave," and then they go on a one-sided rant in my dms about how disgusting pubic hair is when I turn down their shitty and unsolicted offer. I've always loved my pubic hair because I think it's so feminine and beautiful, but the fact that it keeps bags of garbage like that away from me makes me love it even more. 😂
There are so many good ones on the list but as a Gen X, let me throw one out. Men who don't change/adapt. Let me explain. The guy who wears a cap and long hair but is bald on top. The guy who doesn't realize that something that was funny 20 years ago isn't funny anymore. The guy who has the jacked pickup truck that lives with Mom. The guy who gets drunk every Fri/Saturday. The guy who can't talk about anything but sports. The guy who makes fun of a hobby. The guy who asks a question but doesn't listen to an answer or turns it about himself.
>The guy who wears a cap and long hair but is bald on top.
Yeah, vanity might have something to do with this, but my bald uncle refused to wear a hat for 30 years and mocked people who used sunscreen or "hide in the shade, afraid of the sun". Now he has an unhealthy scalp ulcer and piece of his skull removed due to skin cancer on his scalp.
Bald guys. Please wear hats.
>Bald guys. Please wear hats.
As a guy who's well on his way to being bald, I even got a hat with ear flaps to protect my delicate hear-holes. Saw one too many pictures of what can happen to ears that aren't protected from the sun lol.
I like this one a lot. Adaptation is way more interesting/fulfilling even if you are happy being single. For me personally, moving out of the house made it way easier to begin exploring new thought processes or ideas.
Nothing. Literally nothing. I see stories on the internet of men who cheat, lie, are violent, dirty, misogynistic, racist, etc, and people find out about these things AFTER becoming their partners or even spouses. All the time I'm like "how does THIS GUY get laid more than I do?"
Edit: man I got way too real on main
Poor hygiene, manipulative nice guy behavior, manosphere addicts. I should say manosphere addicts definitely can attract girls but those are not going to be healthy relationships. I have yet to see one where the guy hasn’t immediately tried getting the girl to cut out her friends and stuff. So I’ll count that as perpetually loveless.
Oh my god my ex constantly talked shit on girls saying they are like this. Yet all he provided in our relationship was financially security/stability he was not emotionally stable at all. Man I wish it would’ve worked out because he had so many good/redeeming qualities but this was by far the biggest reason why I had to get out. All I wanted was to be close to him, yet he was always buying me shit and then acting like I’m ungrateful. I just wanted you dumbie! Not the shiny stuff.
That's just something I don't get. I get to spend time with my friends BECAUSE I make room for her friends. If I want time with the boys I gotta give her time to be with the girls. I really like it when she hangs out with her single friends too, because they complain about men all the time and it makes her remember that her man changes diapers, wakes up with the kids at night, cleans dishes, and generally makes himself useful.
Its a net AND a gross benefit, its literally win-win.
Entitlement. If you think you are owed anything from women (sex, companionship, sandwiches, clean clothes, etc.) simply because you exist, you'll be perpetually single.
Yup. Met a self proclaimed “nice guy” who always called our male patients sir and the women by their given names with such a tone of disgust. It’s the little tells that everyone picks up on.
I had one recently who slipped and said how hard it is being a guy now because women don’t actually need you. They can work. Older generations had it easy.
Oof.
Trying to use success/failure in romance as an indicator of being being a person who has any inherent value. Not all of us need to sleep with a hundred men or a hundred women or a hundred men *and* women to have any special relationship knowledge.
I’ve had a grand total of five romantic relationships my entire life. It’s the last one that matters.
Jesus Christ thank you!
Got no small number of schmucks on another thread trying to extol the virtues of PUAs and needing to have big numbers, who then get defensive when you point out the obvious flaws
There is definatley the type of guy who never gets women
"Strange" is not a no go per se. I know a lot of guys id describe as very strange but they do quite well with women somehow
Crippling self doubt and confidence. Was a bartender for a couple years and had a regular who, if you never talked to him, you'd think he was getting girls left and right. Was an extremely attractive dude who ticked all the boxes for many girls I knew: skinny, nice beard, groomed well, dressed well too. But he was the absolute biggest downer I had ever met. I literally got him multiple dates because girls would ask me all the time about him and he always blew it. Most time before the date even happened. He always had reasons for why they never worked out which usually boiled down to "I guess I'm not hot enough for them" or "my dick was just too small". Then I'd ask the girls about what happened and it was always he was so depressing, angry, and clingy.
Absolutely zero self-awareness or in denial.
I knew a guy approaching 40 with no real romantic experience. He was a good person, just insufferable… Any time something didn’t work out with a woman (he never got past a second date), he would spend hours or even days doing mental gymnastics to absolve himself of any responsibility in its failure, and create a sorta *gottem* where he found a technicality to excuse his own shortcomings and not change.
The cherry on top? He unironically wanted to give Redditors dating advice after a series of second dates. *Okay…*
Applies to both genders, having an "us versus them" attitude. All women are different, all men are different. The guys that only listen to other unsuccessful guys should be listening to women or successful guys. And, there are women who do the same.
We're all people. If you meet someone, be friendly and respectful (unless they give you reason not to.) Just because someone broke your heart or insulted you, don't assume an entire gender is the same.
When I was casually dating a girl, she tried telling me that the only reason she agreed to go on a date with me was because I left her a thoughtful message. I thought, well thats odd you probably get dozens of those a day, to which she laughed quite hard.
For the next hour or so we went through the dozens of messages she would get in a day (which was shocking). But what was even more shocking was the minimal effort that even more attractive men than me, would put into their messages. Her inbox was just days and days of "Hey beautiful", "Hi", "Hello", "Hey", "Hey gorgeous" mixed in with completely disgusting sexual messages without any provocation or warning.
When ever I see men online complaining about not getting dates, I think of those hundreds of messages.
Doing anything that makes you an "alpha male" (But not the bodybuilding part. If you like being big and strong then you full force) but no women is going to like you if you treat her like a servant.
I've been on dating apps for way too long. But I agree. 'I tried one thing that didn't work now I'm all out of ideas'. I'm trying to be more proactive now.
Being a skittery, bug eyed creep who has a thousand reasons why 'women are too picky', a top 10 of female celebrities he wants to fuck, and having his ambitions with the opposite sex culminate with "I'd like to fuck her!".
I would say the way some men are incapable of listening/recognizing their own flaws and instead just whine and complain while wallowing in their pity party of how unlucky they are at getting women and feel like they just misunderstand how much of a good guy they are are usually doomed to be single for a long time.
Never thought that about a guy after highschool.
For every shitty dude I know, there's an equally shitty woman and I *hope* they find and torment each other for a lifetime.
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Bad hygiene
The number of woman who have things written on their dating profiles along the lines of “must be someone who brushes their teeth” is pretty impressive.
I haven't used dating apps like ever but I refuse to believe this is real. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK.
Maybe it’s my age bracket which is like 35-45 but yeah it’s a thing I promise you.
Feel like if you haven't figured out how to brush your teeth by 35 you prob got bigger problems than finding a date.
Wait il you hear they don't wipe their ass either.
Sometimes there are underlying psychological issues that cause people to avoid routines like brushing their teeth or flossing. For example it has been shown that people with ADHD have a 12 times higher risk of getting tooth decay. I was unfortunately undiagnosed until 30. Have had 4 fillings in my childhood. Studies show that some people suffering from depression also have problems with dental hygiene, in extreme cases leading to dental pain and tooth loss. It's a vicious cycle as poor oral health will also make mental health worse. People will get embarrassed about their teeth and find it hard to eat or drink in social situations. That causes avoidance of social settings and potentially causes development of social anxiety on top. Lack of oral hygiene might also cause problems in relationships or prevent them from finding a partner in the first place. All these issues lead to increased depression which worsens oral hygiene even more. Edit: I just found out, victims of sexual abuse may develop poor dental care, as well. Let us also consider that some people do not have the privilege of having good parents that taught them the importance of oral hygiene.
Duuuude, that's crazy I'm 29 and just started medicine for adhd and I have shaved daily weekly haircuts and brush twice a day and floss. I would only get a haircut like once every six months. My face looks like a homeless person, and my mustach would be on my lips all the time. My wife has definitely appreciated the new self care. Although I did always shower once or twice a day and wash really well, I was definitely capable of doing better. I'm so glad I took the medicine. I feel like a new man.
Can confirm.
I used to have this. “I floss daily and appreciate if you do as well.”
If it’s good enough for DogButtWhisperer it’s good enough for you.
The number of posts I've seen from women complaining how their guy doesn't wash his ass makes me doubt.
That shit has always blown me away, like who raised these boys?
Guys who think it's gay to wash your ass
Fellas, is it gay to have a clean ass?
I have been with more than one man where I found poop smashed in his ball hair when I was going down on him. *No, I didn’t continue having sex of any kind.*
I was eating lunch but now I no longer want it. edit: thanks for the Cake Day wishes! I logged in today worried because I had 27 new messages!
I have decided to become a breathatarian. No more food for this man.
[удалено]
I regret learning how to read now thanks
I wouldn't let a woman near that area, unless I came straight from a shower.
I think that's the craziest thing to me. Like why wouldn't you want to make sure you're as clean as possible when someone is about to go down on you?
Some just lack self-awareness. I'm married and still shower before and after getting freaky.
Impressive, that's far if she's in the bedroom.
First: The actual fuck!? I don't get how guys refuse to wash, let alone manage to attract anyone while I struggle. Second: The actual fuck? Why do you make it sound like you kept going through with it!?
I didn’t continue, I stopped everything and ended it
Did you tell him why? 😄
*"I'm gettin' too old for this shit."*
Someone that constantly mentions either success or failure in high school.
Someone that constantly mentions either success or failure period.
Or someone that constantly talks about high school.
Aw shit I'm a teacher. Guess I'm fucked
Best guess, keep it less than 50% and current, not your own high school days. You're a teacher but that's not all you are.
When they obviously have some shit to prove and posture constantly. Many men think this is like some subtle way to build themselves up in front of women when really it just makes everyone think you’re an ass.
I'll add to this the men that constantly mock or talk down to others. They can't build themselves up, so they try to knock everyone else down. There's a guy I used to work with like this (he also postures constantly) and he is ALWAYS single. Women can't stand being around him.
Forgive me, what is “posturing?” Or what are they doing exactly in their posture that makes it negative (crossed arms, arms on hips)?
It essentially means displaying yourself/ showing off to make yourself seem bigger, more important, or better. It generally has a negative connotation, like you're insecure and overcompensating or acting aggressively.
What about my grandmas voice in my head yelling at me to fix my posture
It's not necessarily a physical thing, like actual *posture.* It's definition is "behavior that is intended to impress or mislead." So, driving a car you can't afford, or pretending to be knowledgeable about something you aren't.
Many many many many men
Wish death upon me
Blood in my eye dog and I can’t see
Men who constantly start fights and can’t finish them is the biggest turn off. My ex was like that, the amount of fights he’d start for no reason was insane. That’s why I was so attracted to my fiancé when we first met, he was nothing but stoic, but when he needed to step up he finished that fight very quickly.
My abusive ex would do this. He’d pick fights with people or use protecting me/“defending my honor” as an excuse to beat the shit out of someone. Once i got shoved by a guy and my ex grabbed the guy by the neck a d body slammed him down onto the curb, and then proceeded to tell everyone about it for weeks later on. Shit scared me, and he’d punch walls and break things when we got in arguments. And every argument was started by me trying to express my feelings about how he treated me and he’d gaslight the shit out of me. I hope he’s homeless in a ditch missing appendages, balding with dysentery.
Yeah you try to address all of this and then he steam rolls you bellowing in your face about how you’re not letting him “express himself” and your invalidating him, and your monopolizing the conversation. Or is that just my ex lol. But for real, my ex would not pick fights with random people but he would pick fights with me constantly. He had nothing but the purest addiction to conflict. Made him seem weak and pathetic. My pity killed any sexual desire.
Why in the world is everyone physically fighting around you?
Who are you dating when both people are getting into fights? I haven’t been in a fight since middle school
Stating they’re an “alpha male” and calling other men “betas.” You’re not special bro. Nobody is gonna see you and think “oh he’s so cool.” You’re just a loser, don’t berate or put other men down that you deem inferior, it makes you look insecure.
I saw the best comment on “alpha” males. It treated them like software- yes alpha, untested, full of problems and not suitable for public consumption yet.
I just went ahead of the whole trend and started calling myself the Omega Male. From what I've seen, they're still at "sigma", so I remain supreme!
You are a 5-Star Man
[удалено]
Funny how you don't see very many self-described "Alpha males" in happy, long term relationships...
When you need to say it, you aren't it.
Tywin Lannister approves of this comment.
This statement is completely true. People who tell me "I'm really funny, everyone loves my sense of humor." have none. People who say "I'm really smart, you don't have to explain anything to me." Explain in more detail.
What if you're a stable genius?
if you say "I am an alpha male" to a woman she will hear "I'm an idiot" lol
I know a few alphas. They typically don't have steady employment and don't pay child support to one or more baby mamas.
Add to this: men who announce *anything* about themselves. Dude, if you're smart, or you're funny, we'll figure it out. You don't need to tell us
Then they rattle off who they follow and who tells them to act like that.
Cat calling. I know a dude, and he does this to EVERY woman he sees. I have yet to see a woman that appreciated this…
Cat calling just makes me feel vulnerable and unsafe. But I get the feeling that that's the whole point of doing it in the first place.
It has always made me feel scared and unsafe. It happened the most ages 11-18
no personal hygiene and no attempt to improve or maintain a healthy body.
The inability to compromise with another person. Never gets past 1 year
I have a friend like this. Perpetually single. "I don't want them to change me." Bro, she asked you to be emotionally more available and talk through conflict , not to give up your hopes, dreams and hobbies.
Belief that women are a homogenous hivemind that can be (and must be) hacked and manipulated into sex
This is a big one. There are guys that see women as being a single entity. They also tend to blame women for all their problems. Some of them are those red-pilled losers that think women should only be housewives for the benefit of society
Right. Universal statements like "women are..." or "the trick to women..", spoken by a man who isn't even with a woman (or even a man that is). Sure, there's a lot of commonality across the spectrum of women. But there are very few universals, and if your mindset is based on understanding another person based on some supposed universal rules, you're not going to be good at relationship regardless of whether your presumptions are accurate (and they probably aren't.) Men tend to be good at figuring out predictable systems, like machines and software. Women aren't that.
The trick to women is that they’re just trying to fucking get by and live like the rest of us so it’s best just to speak plainly and be sincere…;)
ive got one that works. The trick to women is to treat them like human beings.
Critiquing actual supermodels and Hollywood starlets for the tiniest physical imperfections while simultaneously being a fat pasty unwashed slovenly unemployed loser with zero personality or life goals outside of gaming Sorry reddit
Wish I could hit this with an award 😂🥂
Some guy called Sydney Sweeney “barely attractive with a common face” or something similar when I was discussing White Lotus. Like damn, I’m a literal troll then I guess.
All those men calling Margot Robbie “mid” during the Barbie rush 🤢
So funny. Margot won’t be compelled to be their girlfriend no matter what nonsense they say, as they do not exist to her
If she’s mid then I’m a cave troll
If she’s mid, I’m a pile of stank goo with random bones
If she’s mid, I belong under a bridge.
If she’s mid then I’m a hobo who lives in a van down by the river
I knew a guy who insisted repeatedly that Britney Spears was “too fat” for him, that he would NEVER bang her (as if she would offer?). Meanwhile his (perfectly fine and not fat) girlfriend was “fatter” (again, she was not overweight, just a normal healthy size) than Britney Spears and he obviously had no issue having sex with her. People are dumb.
Imo, those opinions seem to only come up once men discuss the “fuckability” of unreachable women. See how a man will swoon over a woman but once she says she isn’t interested she’s a fat cow that no one wants to even touch with a ten foot pole. And an attractive, successful woman who is charismatic and talented is the ultimate threat to a socially awkward man with self esteem issues. If she is out of his league, she’s shit and ugly anyway.
I feel like those guys work themselves up to a rage lather in their own heads. Like, *”Brittney Spears is hot, but she would never sleep with me. Whatever, like I care. I bet she thinks she’s hot shit, what a bitch. I wouldn’t even sleep with her she’s just a fat ugly cow!”*
Probably one of those guys who'd have a conversation that goes like this on dating apps: * Him: wow ur super hot. * Her: thanks but i'm not interested * Him: good you're ugly and fat anyway
That's literally the "Sour Grapes" allegory. Aesop's fables. We've been doing this forever.
Rage lather, I love this term.
I remember some random idiot commenting on a Shakira music video saying she looks haggard and old. Not only is this not true, the comment was from 10 years ago so it really wasn’t true.
Geez. Man can you even imagine having Shakira for a wife? It's not even that she's damn hot, she seems like such a powder keg of personality and traits in all the best ways.
Right!? I’m a straight woman, but when she does that hip roll thing I start questioning that.
r/truerateme on suicide watch.
That sub is absolutely fucking mental
>fat pasty unwashed slovenly unemployed loser Stop, stop, he's already dead 😂
You described my friend who's in their 40's, had one gf in their 20s, complete neckbeard, and still living with his parents. I laughed hard when I read your description. I tried to help but he won't change.
Yup. Beggars are not choosers. Got a friend like that who would constantly criticize the female profiles he sees on dating app while himself is very far from being a Chad. Oh yeah, he had no date the past 4 years either...
I went out with a guy like this. We texted back and forth for a few weeks and got along really great, I really liked him overall until our first date. He spent most of our first date trashing his past dates - one girl’s arms were too hairy, another girl’s nose was too big. He was very surprised I didn’t accept a second date.
I had a similar friend. Not handsome by any stretch but musically talented. He wouldnt consider dating anyone that wasn’t super model material. Around 30 years of age he somehow hooked up with a girl next door type. Friends were really surprised he made out that well. Of course, he starts criticizing her looks, weight, intellect etc. It was awful to witness. She dumped him and our hero didn’t ever get another date (not one) and died single, and tragically, in his mid-50s.
It makes me wonder if some guys like that are just in the closet. They make up impossible expectations because they don’t know why they can never find a woman they’re attracted to.
That thought crossed my mind many times.
Fuck you man I can also smoke A LOT of weed. Scar Jo's a 7 at best and would be lucky to have me
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Funny I know so many married men and men taken that are like this
God damn
Or just critiquing women in general when you are these things
Yeah it's definitely not limited to famous people, you see it happen with servers, clerks, women just walking down the street minding their own business, etc. I used celebs as the gold standard of conventional beauty purely for illustrative purposes, but it absolutely isn't exclusive to them.
Chewing with mouth open
Insulting other guys, including friends, when a new woman comes around to try and look superior. I had a married guy friend that would do this constantly. We no longer speak.
Fuuuuuck those guys.
Please don’t - it will make them think they’re in the right
Real men talk up their hommies. I once came back from the bathroom at a Twin Peaks and overheard my buddy talking me up to our server.
Constantly degrading women
I've seen a lot of screenshots of dating profiles where the whole profile is "why are all the girls on here liars/sluts/gold diggers/other insult?" Bruh, you need to get that attitude sorted out. And somehow they can't undedstand why they can't find a woman interested in them?? If you use your first impression to let everyone know you're judgemental AND whiny, of course dating is going to be hard for you!
Please don’t let them know this. Us women appreciate that this is on their profile up front. Actually, when I see stuff like that, like major red flags on a dating profile, I’ve started to actually block them instead of just swiping left just in case they remove the offensive bullshit and I end up on a date with them someday.
I'm a straight dude, we see a lot of the same thing. One of my favourite genres of tinder bio is "combative" lol Smart move on the blocking
Never taking responsibility or accepting blame.
Talking about how ugly celebrity women are. Dudes looking like a busted teabag be calling Rihanna fat
Or an offensive opposite. Loudly going on about how they would "do her/hit that/shag/oh hell yeah" whenever celebrity women are mentioned. Yeah, bud, I'm sure she'll be thrilled to know that you've bestowed such a high complement upon her and will be knocking at your door in about an hour. That should give you enough time to get the crusted poop out of your ball hair before she gets there...
I suppose not even just celebrities. Any man who regularly talks like that about any women isn't a great look. They remind me of Champ from anchorman.
Introducing themselves to random women on the internet by sending dick pics to them.
If someone is bitter that they dont get any dates and that turns into open verbal anger and animosity toward women, then their chances, which were already pretty low, plunge to close to zero.
When they are overly nice to woman that they want to pick up, like - saying what he thinks she wants to hear, paying extreme attention, pretending to be a feminist etc. It's smells like mix of desperation, scam, is creepy and everyone with basic soft skills can spot it:)
And usually they’re not so nice to women they’re not interested in. I don’t know why they think a woman would be interested in them when they’re nice to her but shitty to her friends.
Woman here and you’re on the nose. Personally, I can usually tell when a man is modifying his personality or lying about his hobbies/interests so it seems like he has more in common with me. It is a massive turn off and makes me think he’ll lie about anything just to get sex. Jeremy from Peep Show is a good, albeit slightly cartoonish, example of this type of behaviour. Nothing turns me off more than someone just blindly agreeing with what I say so I’ll like them. It’s NPC behaviour.
I cringe thinking back to my teens when I was overly clingy and needy. I was so enthusiastically brown-nosing girls i was interested in. It was pathetic.
To live a life without cringe is to live a life without growth
I wanna get this tattooed somewhere. Or maybe a cross stitch. What a beautiful statement
And then in a few years, you can cringe at the tattoo. Built in growth mechanism.
Hey at least you stopped in your teens. And that cringe is a mark of growth, so wear it proudly.
No need to cringe about it. At least you were being friendly to those girls instead of negging them or bullying them like some teenagers do. A lot of us do cringey shit during our teen years so you don’t have to feel bad about it, as long as you’ve learned from it!
>~~A lot of~~ All of us us do cringey shit during our teen years FTFY lol
It looks nice but an ulterior motive dressed up as nice isn't actually nice. It teaches women that they can't trust the intention of men.
Nice is a characteristic based on a behavior. Good is a characteristic based on an intention. Most good people are usually nice, but not all nice people are necessarily good.
Being really offended by things that occur naturally on women’s bodies like stretch marks, cellulite, sagging, body hair, etc. No woman will ever fit their idea of what physical perfection looks like. These dudes tend to put in a ton of effort towards their physical appearance (gym, grooming, etc) while completely neglecting their mental and emotional well-being.
I’ll add: dudes who are (or act) viscerally disgusted/offended by periods, or even the *mere mention* of periods. Like how are you going to act borderline *scared* of a natural bodily process? That’s such pussy shit. The woman is the one who actually has to suffer through the pain, inconvenience, embarrassment, significant financial cost, etc., of bleeding out their genitals and getting hormone blasted - and they have to do this for a week out of every single month, every single year, for decades. Basically 20-25% of their ***entire life***. Yet not only can these men not be bothered to help her out with it or even talk about it, they actively make the woman feel disgusting about a natural and essential bodily process? Shows a complete lack of empathy, awareness, and an attitude of willful ignorance. Ironically, these are likely the same men who view women as little more than baby factories.
Big agree. I was fortunate enough that my high school girlfriend explained to me how everything worked and showed me probably a lot more than many young girls would be comfortable with during those years. As a result, I never looked at any process a woman has to go through as "gross" or "disgusting", it's just nature doing its thing. Any time I've heard a guy get all "That's gross! Nasty!" I've called them out for it. No reason for the dumbass insecure attitude.
I mean, it is gross, it's blood and stuff. But is it grosser than taking a shit? It happens. Grow the fuck up and get on with your day. You're an adult. Stop acting like a 9 year old or a Levitical priest.
If you think periods are gross, you shouldn't have children. Bringing a baby into the world is not glamorous.
I remember reading a thread somewhere on Reddit about a woman who had just delivered twins and her husband left to go stay at his friend’s house because “he couldn’t look at her the same way when she pooped on the table during labor—it traumatized him and made her unattractive to him.” Meanwhile she’s stuck taking care of newborn twins alone. Still hoping it was made up.
My husband wiped my ass multiple times in labour. That’s just what you do for your spouse.
I’ll never forget my (very awesome) ex husband cleaning up the murder scene I produced after our second daughters delivery. Total champ and completely unfazed. I was horrified but his calm reaction made me feel so at ease, especially after such a life and body altering experience It should almost be like a drivers test: can you handle this? Okay then, you get a parenting license
As a dude I can tell you it’s astonishing the number of dudes who have this sort of attitude while not even putting effort into their physical appearance.
Or none at all
I'm kind of lucky in that I keep my pussy hairy, and it does seem to keep a lot of assholes away from me. 😂 I still get the occasional Bro who tells me, "I'll only fuck you if you shave," and then they go on a one-sided rant in my dms about how disgusting pubic hair is when I turn down their shitty and unsolicted offer. I've always loved my pubic hair because I think it's so feminine and beautiful, but the fact that it keeps bags of garbage like that away from me makes me love it even more. 😂
There are so many good ones on the list but as a Gen X, let me throw one out. Men who don't change/adapt. Let me explain. The guy who wears a cap and long hair but is bald on top. The guy who doesn't realize that something that was funny 20 years ago isn't funny anymore. The guy who has the jacked pickup truck that lives with Mom. The guy who gets drunk every Fri/Saturday. The guy who can't talk about anything but sports. The guy who makes fun of a hobby. The guy who asks a question but doesn't listen to an answer or turns it about himself.
>The guy who makes fun of a hobby. Straight up ditched a dude after two months of dating when he wouldn't stop making fun of me.
What was your hobby?
You’ll just make fun of her.
I am not single. I have enough social skills that I’m genuinely curious.
I was making a joke.
Yeah. I guess my social skills aren’t that good.
>The guy who wears a cap and long hair but is bald on top. Yeah, vanity might have something to do with this, but my bald uncle refused to wear a hat for 30 years and mocked people who used sunscreen or "hide in the shade, afraid of the sun". Now he has an unhealthy scalp ulcer and piece of his skull removed due to skin cancer on his scalp. Bald guys. Please wear hats.
>Bald guys. Please wear hats. As a guy who's well on his way to being bald, I even got a hat with ear flaps to protect my delicate hear-holes. Saw one too many pictures of what can happen to ears that aren't protected from the sun lol.
This is a rare genuinely good answer to a question like this.
I like this one a lot. Adaptation is way more interesting/fulfilling even if you are happy being single. For me personally, moving out of the house made it way easier to begin exploring new thought processes or ideas.
I think that’s a really good answer. ! I see so many 30-something guys doing stuff that used to be « cool ». But it’s shit teenagers do
Nothing. Literally nothing. I see stories on the internet of men who cheat, lie, are violent, dirty, misogynistic, racist, etc, and people find out about these things AFTER becoming their partners or even spouses. All the time I'm like "how does THIS GUY get laid more than I do?" Edit: man I got way too real on main
Truck nutz. Edit: this got a whole lot more attention than I thought it would.
Those just sum up so many of the things mentioned.
Not necessarily true, those guys perpetually create single moms.
Poor hygiene, manipulative nice guy behavior, manosphere addicts. I should say manosphere addicts definitely can attract girls but those are not going to be healthy relationships. I have yet to see one where the guy hasn’t immediately tried getting the girl to cut out her friends and stuff. So I’ll count that as perpetually loveless.
Yeah manosphere addicts seem to attract the same shallow air-heads that they complain about.
"All women are worthless, gold-digging, idiots!" - Men who advertise traits that will only attract worthless, gold-digging, idiots.
Oh my god my ex constantly talked shit on girls saying they are like this. Yet all he provided in our relationship was financially security/stability he was not emotionally stable at all. Man I wish it would’ve worked out because he had so many good/redeeming qualities but this was by far the biggest reason why I had to get out. All I wanted was to be close to him, yet he was always buying me shit and then acting like I’m ungrateful. I just wanted you dumbie! Not the shiny stuff.
That's just something I don't get. I get to spend time with my friends BECAUSE I make room for her friends. If I want time with the boys I gotta give her time to be with the girls. I really like it when she hangs out with her single friends too, because they complain about men all the time and it makes her remember that her man changes diapers, wakes up with the kids at night, cleans dishes, and generally makes himself useful. Its a net AND a gross benefit, its literally win-win.
Pseudo "Alphas"
I’m a sigma bro
The fabled sigma, I dared not imagine such a creature truly existed. The prophecy is true!
Entitlement. If you think you are owed anything from women (sex, companionship, sandwiches, clean clothes, etc.) simply because you exist, you'll be perpetually single.
Poor hygiene.
When the only thing they can use to attract women is money
The ‘girls only want bad boys/ I’m such a good guy’ pity party. You’re not. You’re a creep.
he makes that statement after asking “where’s my hug at” for months thinking it forms any type of friendship with women.
I actually shivered, I've known dudes like this it's so damn pathetic.
Yup. Met a self proclaimed “nice guy” who always called our male patients sir and the women by their given names with such a tone of disgust. It’s the little tells that everyone picks up on.
I had one recently who slipped and said how hard it is being a guy now because women don’t actually need you. They can work. Older generations had it easy. Oof.
Trying to use success/failure in romance as an indicator of being being a person who has any inherent value. Not all of us need to sleep with a hundred men or a hundred women or a hundred men *and* women to have any special relationship knowledge. I’ve had a grand total of five romantic relationships my entire life. It’s the last one that matters.
Jesus Christ thank you! Got no small number of schmucks on another thread trying to extol the virtues of PUAs and needing to have big numbers, who then get defensive when you point out the obvious flaws
I personally think there is one for everyone. I have witnessed the strangest people find a partner that fit them.
There is definatley the type of guy who never gets women "Strange" is not a no go per se. I know a lot of guys id describe as very strange but they do quite well with women somehow
Crippling self doubt and confidence. Was a bartender for a couple years and had a regular who, if you never talked to him, you'd think he was getting girls left and right. Was an extremely attractive dude who ticked all the boxes for many girls I knew: skinny, nice beard, groomed well, dressed well too. But he was the absolute biggest downer I had ever met. I literally got him multiple dates because girls would ask me all the time about him and he always blew it. Most time before the date even happened. He always had reasons for why they never worked out which usually boiled down to "I guess I'm not hot enough for them" or "my dick was just too small". Then I'd ask the girls about what happened and it was always he was so depressing, angry, and clingy.
Absolutely zero self-awareness or in denial. I knew a guy approaching 40 with no real romantic experience. He was a good person, just insufferable… Any time something didn’t work out with a woman (he never got past a second date), he would spend hours or even days doing mental gymnastics to absolve himself of any responsibility in its failure, and create a sorta *gottem* where he found a technicality to excuse his own shortcomings and not change. The cherry on top? He unironically wanted to give Redditors dating advice after a series of second dates. *Okay…*
This is the kind of person I imagine in all of the relationship advice subs.
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Applies to both genders, having an "us versus them" attitude. All women are different, all men are different. The guys that only listen to other unsuccessful guys should be listening to women or successful guys. And, there are women who do the same. We're all people. If you meet someone, be friendly and respectful (unless they give you reason not to.) Just because someone broke your heart or insulted you, don't assume an entire gender is the same.
Knew a guy who would only buy and wear oversized clothes. He thought dressing nice or wearing fitted clothing was “gay”
When I was casually dating a girl, she tried telling me that the only reason she agreed to go on a date with me was because I left her a thoughtful message. I thought, well thats odd you probably get dozens of those a day, to which she laughed quite hard. For the next hour or so we went through the dozens of messages she would get in a day (which was shocking). But what was even more shocking was the minimal effort that even more attractive men than me, would put into their messages. Her inbox was just days and days of "Hey beautiful", "Hi", "Hello", "Hey", "Hey gorgeous" mixed in with completely disgusting sexual messages without any provocation or warning. When ever I see men online complaining about not getting dates, I think of those hundreds of messages.
Doing anything that makes you an "alpha male" (But not the bodybuilding part. If you like being big and strong then you full force) but no women is going to like you if you treat her like a servant.
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I've been on dating apps for way too long. But I agree. 'I tried one thing that didn't work now I'm all out of ideas'. I'm trying to be more proactive now.
When they take a vow of celibacy and retire to a monastery.
Lack of selfawarness and doesn’t understand certain social cues. Is very focused on himself and his own issues and lacks empathy for others.
I knew Id find myself on here somewhere
Being a skittery, bug eyed creep who has a thousand reasons why 'women are too picky', a top 10 of female celebrities he wants to fuck, and having his ambitions with the opposite sex culminate with "I'd like to fuck her!".
Post on reddit a lot.
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I would say the way some men are incapable of listening/recognizing their own flaws and instead just whine and complain while wallowing in their pity party of how unlucky they are at getting women and feel like they just misunderstand how much of a good guy they are are usually doomed to be single for a long time.
Never thought that about a guy after highschool. For every shitty dude I know, there's an equally shitty woman and I *hope* they find and torment each other for a lifetime.