I sympathize with you so much. I have felt everything you are feeling. My son is 7 months old. Months 4 and 5 were no doubt the hardest for me... I imagine that could be playing into the stress you are feeling. I went back to work around that time too (mid-February). The job I had at that time was very accommodating, but I hated it & wanted to leave before I ever had my son. I started a new job as a server a couple of months ago, and pumping has been so much harder to manage. I despise it so much… having to make sure pump parts & bottles are clean, having to mentally figure how many times I need to pump while I’m away, and deciding what time in my shift would be most ideal. It’s a lot.
First of all, fuck your coworkers. It’s 2024, we are nursing & working mothers. If they can’t understand that & have some compassion, then whatever. But it is NOT your burden to bear…. And you are not an inconvenience because you are prioritizing breastfeeding your child. It is a full time job on its own, but I cherish every second of it because once it’s over I know I will miss it. You can love breastfeeding but HATE pumping.
As far as your supply, I’ve read that stress does impact it. Granted I am not sure of the extent because my supply withstood a LOT over the past few months (became a single mom when my baby was 8 weeks old). Personally I think that nutrition is more important. You are going to be stressed as a mother, especially if you are working. I don’t think there’s a way to avoid that. And I completely understand the burden of having to make sure you are eating enough & staying hydrated…. Then the stress you feel because you know you aren’t eating like you should. I weigh significantly less than I did before I was pregnant, which is a whole other conversation. BUT I think the most important thing you can do for your supply right now is try your hardest to increase your calories. Stock up on nuts, use a ton of olive oil for anything you cook… try to eat things that are packed with calories. Something that I do is I fix 3 scrambled eggs with cheese & a yogurt parfait (plain whole milk yogurt, frozen berries, granola, & honey) every morning. It’s the one meal I know I can commit to… even when the rest of the day goes to shit. Drink nettle tea too. You can get a bulk bag of it on Amazon. It’s supposed to be good for your supply.
Cooking with a baby is so hard. Just stock up on high calorie snacks, pick at least one high calorie thing you can commit to making for yourself almost every day. You can even get some protein powder & just chug it in a glass or orange juice or something.
ALSO, latch your baby all the time when you aren’t at work. I mean truly as much as he wants. That will let your body know to keep making milk, and it could help if your body is getting mixed signals from the pump. When I’m pumping, I also squeeze my boob a ton to get more milk out. Like towards the end of my pumping session, the pump alone won’t get much out, so I go around my boob kind of squeezing different sections to help more milk come out. I get at least an extra ounce than what I’d get if I didn’t do that.
This is a lot to read, but I want you to know that the stress you are feeling is normal. Society is not set up for nursing mothers. You are doing so much right now. We often put ourselves LAST & put everything else first (work, the house, etc.) It is easier said than done but try to find small ways to take care of yourself. My house being unclean gives me anxiety, so it’s hard to sacrifice that, I know. Try putting on some meditation music during the day. You don’t have to sit & meditate but even having that kind of music on will help you feel more relaxed & in a better state of mind. I’m sending you so much love. You and your baby are most important right now.
Thank you so much. I needed to hear this. Sometimes I feel crazy when I feel this way. Society is not built for postpartum moms and expects us to just get back at it. Whenever I mention this to my mom she just talks about how she didn’t get to breastfeed and only got 6 weeks off of work. Sometimes we all need just a little validation that our feelings are normal. My boyfriend was working on getting a pay increase so I could stop working for a bit and go to school so I can have a different career path. He will no longer be getting a pay increase so I am now spiraling on what to do. I need to get a new job bc fuck my current job and all of my supervisors/coworkers.
Eating was so much easier when I was at home on maternity leave. I could just make food and eat all day. Now I’m scrambling to grab food in the morning before work. I need to get back into a rhythm of packing food the night before. It’s just another thing to add to my long bedtime routine lol. I need to invest in more protein snacks.
Thank you so much for the love and support. I appreciate your comment a lot. You have no idea.
Yes! And I learned that the hard way. I worked at a Walmart and my team leads (who were women btw) gave me such a hard time. I never was able to pump more than 8 oz each session, but once I started to work there, it went down to 3-4 oz. Sometimes I would be lucky if I got any at all... It got so bad that my fiancé would have to bring our daughter to me, so I could feed her on my lunch break and get my supply back up just enough to get a bottle for my last pump. I actually had to talk to my manager and tell him what was going on, because one of my team leads actually took some of my last breaks away because I spent "too much time" pumping. When I realized that what she was doing was illegal, I went straight to him and told him that if he wasn't going to tell them to stop messing with my pump breaks, I was gonna quit. And then it got to the point where someone else would cover that team lead and not get told about my pump breaks. So then that person would be calling me over the intercom, expecting me to be back in 15 mins, when it took me 30-40 mins just to get 4 oz. I eventually did quit, and my supply came back even stronger. But man... It was hell.
I’m so glad you got out of there and were able to get your supply back up! I am hoping to find another job. I have just been in this specific field for 5 years. I don’t have many other skills or a college education. I would not be able to make as much money as I do now.
I'm not college educated and customer service is basically my main past history of employment. But if you break down all the skills you learned for your current job, I'm pretty sure there can be other opportunities out there :)
Ughhh I was just complaining about all of this to my friend who is also struggling to keep up with a supply! Breastfeeding is a full time job AND we are working full time jobs. That’s not including all of the other demands we have throughout the day. Society is not supportive of this demand. Then there is the internal conflict of not being good enough at your job and not providing enough for your baby. Why are there no laws that support women and babies. There should be some type of maternity law that allows 6 months leave so we can feed our little ones.
I feel you momma and you are doing a great job!
I hear that other countries offer even a year of maternity leave! I wish. I hated having to go back. My boyfriend earns a lot but nowadays one income is never enough.
Are you still doing night feeds/pumps? I started noticing a dip when my son was sleeping through the night and I didn’t wake up to pump. Since I now do two dream feeds (rip my sleep again) my supply has gone back up a bit. I never had as much as you did though. It’s also normal to supply only what baby needs after like 3 ish months. When my son was in the nicu I was pumping like 7 oz and now I’m only pumping like 4 oz which about what he drinks a bottle.
My son usually has one-two feedings during the night so I don’t usually pump at night. He doesn’t sleep through the night yet, but I will take it so I don’t have to get up and pump.
I sympathize with you so much. I have felt everything you are feeling. My son is 7 months old. Months 4 and 5 were no doubt the hardest for me... I imagine that could be playing into the stress you are feeling. I went back to work around that time too (mid-February). The job I had at that time was very accommodating, but I hated it & wanted to leave before I ever had my son. I started a new job as a server a couple of months ago, and pumping has been so much harder to manage. I despise it so much… having to make sure pump parts & bottles are clean, having to mentally figure how many times I need to pump while I’m away, and deciding what time in my shift would be most ideal. It’s a lot. First of all, fuck your coworkers. It’s 2024, we are nursing & working mothers. If they can’t understand that & have some compassion, then whatever. But it is NOT your burden to bear…. And you are not an inconvenience because you are prioritizing breastfeeding your child. It is a full time job on its own, but I cherish every second of it because once it’s over I know I will miss it. You can love breastfeeding but HATE pumping. As far as your supply, I’ve read that stress does impact it. Granted I am not sure of the extent because my supply withstood a LOT over the past few months (became a single mom when my baby was 8 weeks old). Personally I think that nutrition is more important. You are going to be stressed as a mother, especially if you are working. I don’t think there’s a way to avoid that. And I completely understand the burden of having to make sure you are eating enough & staying hydrated…. Then the stress you feel because you know you aren’t eating like you should. I weigh significantly less than I did before I was pregnant, which is a whole other conversation. BUT I think the most important thing you can do for your supply right now is try your hardest to increase your calories. Stock up on nuts, use a ton of olive oil for anything you cook… try to eat things that are packed with calories. Something that I do is I fix 3 scrambled eggs with cheese & a yogurt parfait (plain whole milk yogurt, frozen berries, granola, & honey) every morning. It’s the one meal I know I can commit to… even when the rest of the day goes to shit. Drink nettle tea too. You can get a bulk bag of it on Amazon. It’s supposed to be good for your supply. Cooking with a baby is so hard. Just stock up on high calorie snacks, pick at least one high calorie thing you can commit to making for yourself almost every day. You can even get some protein powder & just chug it in a glass or orange juice or something. ALSO, latch your baby all the time when you aren’t at work. I mean truly as much as he wants. That will let your body know to keep making milk, and it could help if your body is getting mixed signals from the pump. When I’m pumping, I also squeeze my boob a ton to get more milk out. Like towards the end of my pumping session, the pump alone won’t get much out, so I go around my boob kind of squeezing different sections to help more milk come out. I get at least an extra ounce than what I’d get if I didn’t do that. This is a lot to read, but I want you to know that the stress you are feeling is normal. Society is not set up for nursing mothers. You are doing so much right now. We often put ourselves LAST & put everything else first (work, the house, etc.) It is easier said than done but try to find small ways to take care of yourself. My house being unclean gives me anxiety, so it’s hard to sacrifice that, I know. Try putting on some meditation music during the day. You don’t have to sit & meditate but even having that kind of music on will help you feel more relaxed & in a better state of mind. I’m sending you so much love. You and your baby are most important right now.
Thank you so much. I needed to hear this. Sometimes I feel crazy when I feel this way. Society is not built for postpartum moms and expects us to just get back at it. Whenever I mention this to my mom she just talks about how she didn’t get to breastfeed and only got 6 weeks off of work. Sometimes we all need just a little validation that our feelings are normal. My boyfriend was working on getting a pay increase so I could stop working for a bit and go to school so I can have a different career path. He will no longer be getting a pay increase so I am now spiraling on what to do. I need to get a new job bc fuck my current job and all of my supervisors/coworkers. Eating was so much easier when I was at home on maternity leave. I could just make food and eat all day. Now I’m scrambling to grab food in the morning before work. I need to get back into a rhythm of packing food the night before. It’s just another thing to add to my long bedtime routine lol. I need to invest in more protein snacks. Thank you so much for the love and support. I appreciate your comment a lot. You have no idea.
Have you changed the duckbill valves on your pump recently? They should be changed every few months otherwise the pump is way less efficient
It’s been about two months! Thanks for this comment I needed the reminder. I will try that.
Yes! And I learned that the hard way. I worked at a Walmart and my team leads (who were women btw) gave me such a hard time. I never was able to pump more than 8 oz each session, but once I started to work there, it went down to 3-4 oz. Sometimes I would be lucky if I got any at all... It got so bad that my fiancé would have to bring our daughter to me, so I could feed her on my lunch break and get my supply back up just enough to get a bottle for my last pump. I actually had to talk to my manager and tell him what was going on, because one of my team leads actually took some of my last breaks away because I spent "too much time" pumping. When I realized that what she was doing was illegal, I went straight to him and told him that if he wasn't going to tell them to stop messing with my pump breaks, I was gonna quit. And then it got to the point where someone else would cover that team lead and not get told about my pump breaks. So then that person would be calling me over the intercom, expecting me to be back in 15 mins, when it took me 30-40 mins just to get 4 oz. I eventually did quit, and my supply came back even stronger. But man... It was hell.
I’m so glad you got out of there and were able to get your supply back up! I am hoping to find another job. I have just been in this specific field for 5 years. I don’t have many other skills or a college education. I would not be able to make as much money as I do now.
I'm not college educated and customer service is basically my main past history of employment. But if you break down all the skills you learned for your current job, I'm pretty sure there can be other opportunities out there :)
Ughhh I was just complaining about all of this to my friend who is also struggling to keep up with a supply! Breastfeeding is a full time job AND we are working full time jobs. That’s not including all of the other demands we have throughout the day. Society is not supportive of this demand. Then there is the internal conflict of not being good enough at your job and not providing enough for your baby. Why are there no laws that support women and babies. There should be some type of maternity law that allows 6 months leave so we can feed our little ones. I feel you momma and you are doing a great job!
I hear that other countries offer even a year of maternity leave! I wish. I hated having to go back. My boyfriend earns a lot but nowadays one income is never enough.
and thank you, you are too.
Are you still doing night feeds/pumps? I started noticing a dip when my son was sleeping through the night and I didn’t wake up to pump. Since I now do two dream feeds (rip my sleep again) my supply has gone back up a bit. I never had as much as you did though. It’s also normal to supply only what baby needs after like 3 ish months. When my son was in the nicu I was pumping like 7 oz and now I’m only pumping like 4 oz which about what he drinks a bottle.
My son usually has one-two feedings during the night so I don’t usually pump at night. He doesn’t sleep through the night yet, but I will take it so I don’t have to get up and pump.