I think you should make a card, maybe with a mini blanket or with a drawing of the blanket, and write something about how delighted you are about their baby/wedding/etc and all the more happy because there's so many joyous occasions in the family, but that this means their blanket might take a while. That way they know you're thinking of them, they're included, but you're only human.
But I also want to say that you have the right to stop and think and decide if it actually makes you happy to crank out this amount of workor if it's more obligation. It's important to take care of yourself, and you deserve time to work on whatever project you actually feel like, not just be a blanket factory. This sounds like an absolutely lovely tradition, but traditions that are based on the unpaid labor (and supply costs?) of one person are only worth it as long as that person genuinely enjoys it.
And on that note, if anyone complains about it - about you being slow, or about you stepping down, and tries to tell you how important the tradition is, you have my blessing to tell them "Oh I'm so happy you think so, and I would be more than willing to teach you the pattern so you can continue the tradition!"
I really like your idea for the card!! i’m not too worried about anyone not valuing my labor but i’m definitely worried about just the timing. it’s an absolute coincidence that 4 people close to me have gotten engaged and they can’t control it at all. i think im just getting in my head because my aunt was such a speedy crocheter.
Your aunt also likely had decades of practice and honing the craft, to where each stitch was made with muscle memory more than effort. As long as you enjoy the make process that's really what matters
It may be worth considering how distant of relations/family members you'll be making them for. If you're adding in you bf's family, that's great, but that means it's now *your* tradition. A cousin may be fine now, and a maybe a baby blanket for your cousins kids. But when those cousins kids get married? Have their own kids? You might want to think of guidelines of how distant of relations you're willing to do this for.
It's also fine if maybe you make the four traditional blankets for the couples, and not make a second. It's up to you, your capacity, and what you want to do.
I tried to make my dad a blanket for his birthday this year and failed with the timing. So I busted out a 4"×6" representation and gifted him that with the knowledge the full sized one was in progress, lol.
Literally the second i mess up i use it as an excuse and i’m like “well…i tried” and give up LMAO. there’s something about blankets that is so hard for me to get into
Seriously. Do it. And if your boyfriend likes this tradition, it'll take you less time to teach him how to crochet and then have him involved in making blankets for his side of the family.
Hell, you could probably recruit people on here. Send me a pattern and a 50% deposit for yarn and my labor would be free. Maybe I could even dig through a yarn stash I inherited a few months ago and the yarn could be free too.
I would never devalue your labor like that!! i’m probably going to be sticking to value/thrifted yarns just due to the sheer volume and working through my stash first but i will absolutely train some people to help me. would be a really great method with some granny square blanket patterns!
Is there a reason why it has to be only you? Is there anyone else to share the workload with? Someone else suggested spreading them out - with this idea, there are crochet blankets that can work up in an evening or two - can you make these first and then later give them the traditional patterned one?
it was originally three of us (one from each generation) but sadly my grandmother passed away and my aunt has developed pretty bad arthritis. she pushed through it while i was going through school but now that i have a steady job she can’t crochet as much as she used to. i’ve known for years it’s coming, im just on the younger side of my generation of my family so everyone’s right around the age of marriage. none of them knew they were going to be engaged around the same time since they were all proposed to and im sure some weddings are further out than others, i just worry a ton. i actually think the idea of the quick afghans is a really good one and maybe i’ll finish one per couple based on their wedding timeline before i move onto the heirloom ones. i appreciate everyone’s concern though i know a lot of times people don’t know how long it takes to make a blanket 😭.
My grandmother taught me, too, and I make the baby blankets for my family. It's a lovely responsibility, but I also hate the pressure. Hopefully you can keep that balance of proud responsibility and less pressure! I try to sit on my queen throne and say you'll get one when you get one! My nephews blanket was a football field because by the time I got to him he was old enough to have a favorite sport. It's still on his bed years later because football is still his favorite sport. So I know he values what I made for him.
So you ain’t had two others helping her make these family blankets and now a 3 person job is passed to 1?
Curious if your aunt did the job solo for her cousins as well or if it was more so for her nieces and nephews?
Are you making one blanket per couple or one for each person? Your cousins’ finances may not value hand made items, which can lead to a lot of frustration and disappointment down the road. One afghan made with quality yarn as a wedding present is much more reasonable.
I would like to point out that if this applies to all descendants of your grandmother the number of people needing blankets is going to increase as you go down the generations and it's no wonder you in the third generation are ending up with too much work! Can you see if any of your cousins are interested in learning to crochet? Maybe one or two of them could work with you on their fiance's blanket to learn the tradition?
right now i am sticking to first cousins and my sister and well as my boyfriends two sisters. depending on if anyone else wants to learn how to do it, it’ll stay that way. My father is one of 5 so that’s already a lot to juggle in the first place but most of my cousins don’t plan on having kids so that does help out with future blanket projections. only my sister is younger than me and three of the four cousins who are older than me and unmarried are the ones who have just gotten engaged. this years basically a sprint is all. i probably won’t have to make one for years after this!
Traditions can change, you don't have to keep doing something the same way just because that's the way it's been done. Perhaps you could do one per couple rather than per person, especially if you're doing full sized blankets (presumably they'll share a bed). Otherwise give them each a square and a promise and work through them at your own pace
I would first try to find out what timelines you are looking at for all 4 5? weddings. you may find some are much farther away than others.
Then work out how much time you actually have for each pair of blankets. Then consider breaking that up further by talking to the people getting married and offer a change in the tradition. maybe the heirloom blanket for the partner is their wedding gift and the second one can be an anniversary gift (if you even want to continue that tradition). 4 or 5 weddings making 2 blankets and that isn't even considering if any babies get added to that mix as well. So set the expectations about what you are able and willing to do in what time frame. If anyone argues against you being able to take the time you need tell them they can make their own blankets or be last on the list since others are being more respectful of your time.
Remember you are gifting your time, skills, and materials. No one has the right to that from you. You get to decide how much you are able and willing to gift of yourself.
You aren't the only one in your family who is able to carry down that traditions and you are nor obligated to take up the reigns that someone else choose to create. If anyone feels strong enough about the tradition to take it on let them do it. They are not owed your skills to carry it on.
Hadn't heard of mile a minute patterns, looks like a great way to get other family members involved! Start a new tradition where everyone helps crochet a piece for the couple
For family member who already has that heirloom pattern blanket - look at mile a minute afghans (made one for each of my nieces and they all loved them but I had to give them all the blankets at the same time, my sister has issues).
I would time it by the wedding (we have had a couple of failed engagements in my family). I'd do the card suggestion and then gift the blankets shortly after the weddings.
Is this something you actually want to do? I understand wanting to carry on the tradition, but it wasn’t one that you began, and two blankets per couple is a pretty significant amount of time and labor. I would be thinking about maybe altering the tradition to one blanket to be shared by each couple unless there’s another family member that can take on a reasonable amount of the work. I would *definitely* alter the tradition and do one blanket for couples who aren’t actually part of the family that started the tradition- it’s nice of you to make things for your boyfriend’s family, and they can be your family too, but they definitely would not have any expectations of being part of that tradition!
Instead of two full sized blankets for each couple, make two half blankets and sew them together (and then pretend it's symbolic of the couple coming together rather than a way to reduce the labour!)
I would also pick something that works up fast, like a granny square or anything in chunky yarn
Depending on how fast you are and what yarn you use, you could bang one out in a weekend, I bet
honestly, a chunky granny square might be the perfect move! the heirloom pattern is a relatively simple one since my great grandmother had a LOT of grandkids so i’m not too worried about that one
The boyfriend curse is a thing--I wouldn't want to expand it to his family as well 😅 (especially if their desire/appreciation for an afghan is unknown).
i’ve had the boyfriend curse get me in the past! thankfully he wears all the sweaters i’ve made him and there’s no such thing as the boyfriends sister curse
I think do it in order of engagement, because you say the blankets are for the engagements. If this is a familiar tradition and everyone knows that all these engagements piled up, unless your family is full of jerks I am sure they will understand the fact that it takes time to make them.
The idea of a little card with a "preview" blanket is genius, and yeah if anyone gets entitled about their "owed" blanket, they probably don't deserve one.
you can just take your time! my SIL makes all of us sweaters when we hit birthday milestones and she made her dad's two years late, and it was fine. also, big chunky yarn is your friend. unless you need a specific weight for the heirloom pattern (which is so cool!!!!) but even then I think it'd be cool to put your own spin on it.
Can you just make them smaller blankets. And choose a stitch that is very easy for you. For me a continuous granny square blanket Is the easiest and fastest. I can crank one out in a few days. Max a week. I use a larger hook than the yarn suggested which makes it quicker.
You can also time them by the wedding and don't take much pressure. You are only human and have two hands. I'm sure everyone will understand.
Yes! I’ll try and find a photo of it but for similarities sake, this is a photo of something similar
https://preview.redd.it/ixg969ofskbd1.jpeg?width=732&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7640249c8a33da5e9b2be2ae9d38939d3f1d50f8
this one is by the purple poncho according to the watermark and my great grandmothers pattern varies slightly and has a specific border but it’s a basic pineapple pattern at its core
I would make them in order of who got engaged first. Since this is a family tradition I’m assuming it’s not a secret. So, you work on them as you can without pressure and tell them you’ll get one when you get one. 🤷🏻♀️
When I first read your post I’ll admit I was a little jealous at the idea of having 8 blankets that need making. Then I remembered the anxiety that would cause me and I’m glad I’m not in that position. lol
Right!! both terrifying and exciting! i’m taking full creative freedom in four of them too!! it’s a chance to do patterns i’ve wanted to try but had no motivation for. tbh the person with the furthest away wedding might end up with a persian tiles afghan because i’ve been DYING to make it
Back in 2022, I promised my 4 grown children, my son-in-law, and my 2 grandchildren that they were all getting blankets for their birthdays! 7 blankets to make, and I am still a beginner, lol. I got over whelmed and just stopped.
This year, I have made 5 blankets and am working on the 6th. I spent 4 months cranking out the first 5, and the last 2 are due in October and November. I figure that if I do 2 or 3 rows a day that I will finish on time.
I love the card idea, so they know it is coming, just not when.
Do what you can, when you can. Good people will appreciate your effort, and be patient.
Take your time! I have become the work mom where I work all my coworkers get a baby blanket. We had so many pregnancies at the same time I couldn’t keep up. I did start making giant grannies and call the midwife is another favorite. I started going thru my stash and just making blankets to be prepared. Then I had rotator cuff surgery my own daughter got a pre made and my boss got a not that said as soon as I could I would make hers she was very thankful for that. So her shower she got a card and a copy of “Good night moon” my favorite children’s book.
An IOU card was suggested which while lovely is really only a short term fix. Given you are also expected to do blankets for births, there's a non-zero chance you'll still be working through this lot when the next baby comes around
There is a longer term solution, to make this sustainable:
Other family members need to learn to crochet.
Families expand over time (usually), so with each generation there's more people to make blankets for. Therefore, at some point it's going to be impossible for a single person to keep up. The solution is that the tradition becomes a *family* tradition and you all share the load.
I'm curious on what they are for engagement & not for the actual wedding? I love the family heirloom thyme, but think that it could be altered to couples for wedding gifts. Since this tradition went from 3 crafters to 1 is a ton of pressure.
Good luck! You will come up with what works best for you!
If it helps, official etiquette is that wedding gifts can be given for up to a year after the ceremony. I think this originated when news and packages could take months to travel, but it remains the rule today.
I made 8 blankets over the course of about 6 months but some where larger and more detailed than others but I definitely stayed up some nights later than I normally would.
When I had my 2nd child in 2021, my sil gave me a gift with a card that had a handmade "coupon" for a baby item of my choice for her to knit for me (I've yet to cash in bc she experienced childloss and I know it'd be really hard for her to do) maybe you could do something like that? Get what you can done, and give others "coupons" for their blankets so you aren't so stressed about trying to finish that many in such a small time frame
I'm probably the worst person to ask but I give handmade things late, maybe even years late 🙈 I don't even care 😂🤣😂
Be honest just say you don't have the time they will receive it eventually then go put your feet up. I made my sister a bag with fabric I bought her four years ago & my crochet isn't anymore up-to-date 🤭
You are supposed to enjoy your hobbies & the timeline you have set yourself my needs to be extended.
I made afghans for everyone in my family one year, and my husband's in another year. Each one was unique. However, it's a lot of yarn and even using discount yarn, the cost can be a lot. Everyone seemed happy with their gifts.
But this was something I liked to do. If this is onerous, and if you can afford it, buy some homemade afghans.
Maybe make baby afghans instead for the babies when they are born. Start now, and put aside until you need them.
A few options:
* Tell each couple there's a new family tradition where you have to be engaged 5 years before you can get married. And nobody is allowed to have a baby before they get married either. That should give you plenty of time to get all the blankets made before they get married and you have to start thinking any more blankets for newborns.
* Just make granny square blankets and call upon r/crochet to crowdsource you some squares.
* Teach them all to crochet and then they can make each others blankets. It's their own silly fault for all getting engaged together anyway.
And the most serious (AKA most boring) option:
* Tell them you're happy to carry on the tradition but they probably won't all get their blankets on time. Maybe focus on the partners first as you've already said the blood relatives have a blanket from when they were born? Or pick favourites... maybe accept bribes to bump people up the queue?
Teaching some family members to crochet might actually be a good idea. With so many people getting married, there's a strong chance they're going to be having babies at similar times too so you're going to be overworked again.
How about gathering the new family members and teach them how to make the blanket, and then they each make and gift one blanket to each other (or to their spouse??) Sort of make it a bonding activity while simultaneously passing down the tradition. Or would that not work with the tradition or their schedules?
Change the tradition to a smaller crochet gift of their choosing.
Find two other people in the family who wanna learn and wanna help.
Or one couple gets one blanket. If they're getting married , why does each person need their own blanket?
Could your aunt help by making some of the blankets? Since this is a tradition she has passed on to you, maybe she would be willing to help make the blankets.
That being said, traditionally, you have up to a year after the wedding to give them a gift. If that helps at all. I would go by who is getting married first, because the first couple that got engaged might be waiting years before they actually get married.
According to Etiquette Rules: it is acceptable to give a wedding gift any time from the announcement of the wedding up until the first anniversary. So you have x + one year per blanket, if you so choose to carry on this tradition.
I think this is an amazing tradition, but as folks have mentioned you can also make choices. I get wanting the FO by the wedding. Do you have to? No! You get to make the rules as the bearer of the tradition.
If you use chunky homespun yarn and an N hook with a basic pattern, that works up in like 6 hours.
I think giving them a card explaining the tradition, and how that means you have to make 8 blankets which is time-consuming so they won't get their blankets YET and in the meantime if they have any colors they like, please tell you would be good?
Also I think I would maybe do 4 blankets and do the other 4 as an anniversary gift or something?
I feel your pain at the moment. My next door neighbor just delivered twins and our only friend couple in this town now have two more grandbabies on the way. Their first is still obsessed with the blanket I made for her birth over two years ago, so I obviously have to make them for their cousins. Also, my neighbor is an amazing woman… and all babies need fluffy warm blankets and stuffies to match.
So, I completed two blankets and two stuffies on the day last week that the neighbor’s twins were delivered, and just finished with the second of two more blankets last night. Started working on the two stuffies today. Hoping for the best, as the baby shower is coming up next week!
My hands hurt.
You may want to consider passing the tradition to a couple more of your cousins. Especially as the babies start cranking out, it’s going to be exponentially harder for you to keep up than it was for the generation above you because the family is growing.
If you can’t get them all done it time, I would at least do one blanket for each couple in order of soonest wedding. If you finish those four, start the blankets for their partners. It would be your discretion if you give it to the partner you are related to first of each couple or to their partner. But I would keep consistency with each couple. If you choose the one you’re related to for one couple, choose that person for all of them. That way you hopefully can give a gift to every wedding and have extra time to complete the second blankets as needed.
My one aunt used to make quilts for all of her nieces and nephews when they graduated HS.
Well, 6 of us (I think) graduated within 5 years of each other. We knew that we weren’t getting them on time. I just thought it was sweet that she did it at all!
My one aunt used to make quilts for all of her nieces and nephews when they graduated HS.
Well, 6 of us (I think) graduated within 5 years of each other. We knew that we weren’t getting them on time. I just thought it was sweet that she did it at all!
My one aunt used to make quilts for all of her nieces and nephews when they graduated HS.
Well, 6 of us (I think) graduated within 5 years of each other. We knew that we weren’t getting them on time. I just thought it was sweet that she did it at all!
My one aunt used to make quilts for all of her nieces and nephews when they graduated HS.
Well, 6 of us (I think) graduated within 5 years of each other. We knew that we weren’t getting them on time. I just thought it was sweet that she did it at all!
My one aunt used to make quilts for all of her nieces and nephews when they graduated HS.
Well, 6 of us (I think) graduated within 5 years of each other. We knew that we weren’t getting them on time. I just thought it was sweet that she did it at all!
I think you should make a card, maybe with a mini blanket or with a drawing of the blanket, and write something about how delighted you are about their baby/wedding/etc and all the more happy because there's so many joyous occasions in the family, but that this means their blanket might take a while. That way they know you're thinking of them, they're included, but you're only human. But I also want to say that you have the right to stop and think and decide if it actually makes you happy to crank out this amount of workor if it's more obligation. It's important to take care of yourself, and you deserve time to work on whatever project you actually feel like, not just be a blanket factory. This sounds like an absolutely lovely tradition, but traditions that are based on the unpaid labor (and supply costs?) of one person are only worth it as long as that person genuinely enjoys it. And on that note, if anyone complains about it - about you being slow, or about you stepping down, and tries to tell you how important the tradition is, you have my blessing to tell them "Oh I'm so happy you think so, and I would be more than willing to teach you the pattern so you can continue the tradition!"
I really like your idea for the card!! i’m not too worried about anyone not valuing my labor but i’m definitely worried about just the timing. it’s an absolute coincidence that 4 people close to me have gotten engaged and they can’t control it at all. i think im just getting in my head because my aunt was such a speedy crocheter.
Your aunt also likely had decades of practice and honing the craft, to where each stitch was made with muscle memory more than effort. As long as you enjoy the make process that's really what matters
It may be worth considering how distant of relations/family members you'll be making them for. If you're adding in you bf's family, that's great, but that means it's now *your* tradition. A cousin may be fine now, and a maybe a baby blanket for your cousins kids. But when those cousins kids get married? Have their own kids? You might want to think of guidelines of how distant of relations you're willing to do this for. It's also fine if maybe you make the four traditional blankets for the couples, and not make a second. It's up to you, your capacity, and what you want to do.
I tried to make my dad a blanket for his birthday this year and failed with the timing. So I busted out a 4"×6" representation and gifted him that with the knowledge the full sized one was in progress, lol.
I would time it for a wedding gift, just in case the engagement falls through
To your point about any complainers— they get relocated to the bottom of any urgency list.
Find a "ghost" crocheter who can help you! No one would ever have to know.
i love that 🤣 i’ll have all my friends sitting in my living room like we’re a crochet factory
Can i volunteer as tribute to the cause? I love making blankets but have run out of people to gift them to
Can I just say I am jealous of your brain that loves making blankets? I die 6 inches in.
Literally the second i mess up i use it as an excuse and i’m like “well…i tried” and give up LMAO. there’s something about blankets that is so hard for me to get into
Seriously. Do it. And if your boyfriend likes this tradition, it'll take you less time to teach him how to crochet and then have him involved in making blankets for his side of the family. Hell, you could probably recruit people on here. Send me a pattern and a 50% deposit for yarn and my labor would be free. Maybe I could even dig through a yarn stash I inherited a few months ago and the yarn could be free too.
I would never devalue your labor like that!! i’m probably going to be sticking to value/thrifted yarns just due to the sheer volume and working through my stash first but i will absolutely train some people to help me. would be a really great method with some granny square blanket patterns!
Do it!!!
This is actually a fantastic idea.
Is there a reason why it has to be only you? Is there anyone else to share the workload with? Someone else suggested spreading them out - with this idea, there are crochet blankets that can work up in an evening or two - can you make these first and then later give them the traditional patterned one?
it was originally three of us (one from each generation) but sadly my grandmother passed away and my aunt has developed pretty bad arthritis. she pushed through it while i was going through school but now that i have a steady job she can’t crochet as much as she used to. i’ve known for years it’s coming, im just on the younger side of my generation of my family so everyone’s right around the age of marriage. none of them knew they were going to be engaged around the same time since they were all proposed to and im sure some weddings are further out than others, i just worry a ton. i actually think the idea of the quick afghans is a really good one and maybe i’ll finish one per couple based on their wedding timeline before i move onto the heirloom ones. i appreciate everyone’s concern though i know a lot of times people don’t know how long it takes to make a blanket 😭.
My grandmother taught me, too, and I make the baby blankets for my family. It's a lovely responsibility, but I also hate the pressure. Hopefully you can keep that balance of proud responsibility and less pressure! I try to sit on my queen throne and say you'll get one when you get one! My nephews blanket was a football field because by the time I got to him he was old enough to have a favorite sport. It's still on his bed years later because football is still his favorite sport. So I know he values what I made for him.
So you ain’t had two others helping her make these family blankets and now a 3 person job is passed to 1? Curious if your aunt did the job solo for her cousins as well or if it was more so for her nieces and nephews? Are you making one blanket per couple or one for each person? Your cousins’ finances may not value hand made items, which can lead to a lot of frustration and disappointment down the road. One afghan made with quality yarn as a wedding present is much more reasonable.
I would like to point out that if this applies to all descendants of your grandmother the number of people needing blankets is going to increase as you go down the generations and it's no wonder you in the third generation are ending up with too much work! Can you see if any of your cousins are interested in learning to crochet? Maybe one or two of them could work with you on their fiance's blanket to learn the tradition?
right now i am sticking to first cousins and my sister and well as my boyfriends two sisters. depending on if anyone else wants to learn how to do it, it’ll stay that way. My father is one of 5 so that’s already a lot to juggle in the first place but most of my cousins don’t plan on having kids so that does help out with future blanket projections. only my sister is younger than me and three of the four cousins who are older than me and unmarried are the ones who have just gotten engaged. this years basically a sprint is all. i probably won’t have to make one for years after this!
Traditions can change, you don't have to keep doing something the same way just because that's the way it's been done. Perhaps you could do one per couple rather than per person, especially if you're doing full sized blankets (presumably they'll share a bed). Otherwise give them each a square and a promise and work through them at your own pace
This. Traditions change. One per couple seems like plenty to me.
This is what I was thinking----a blanket for the couple.
And the cousins might not even want all these blankets. Not everyone is into crochet or needs a lot of blankets.
I would first try to find out what timelines you are looking at for all 4 5? weddings. you may find some are much farther away than others. Then work out how much time you actually have for each pair of blankets. Then consider breaking that up further by talking to the people getting married and offer a change in the tradition. maybe the heirloom blanket for the partner is their wedding gift and the second one can be an anniversary gift (if you even want to continue that tradition). 4 or 5 weddings making 2 blankets and that isn't even considering if any babies get added to that mix as well. So set the expectations about what you are able and willing to do in what time frame. If anyone argues against you being able to take the time you need tell them they can make their own blankets or be last on the list since others are being more respectful of your time. Remember you are gifting your time, skills, and materials. No one has the right to that from you. You get to decide how much you are able and willing to gift of yourself. You aren't the only one in your family who is able to carry down that traditions and you are nor obligated to take up the reigns that someone else choose to create. If anyone feels strong enough about the tradition to take it on let them do it. They are not owed your skills to carry it on.
Hadn't heard of mile a minute patterns, looks like a great way to get other family members involved! Start a new tradition where everyone helps crochet a piece for the couple
For family member who already has that heirloom pattern blanket - look at mile a minute afghans (made one for each of my nieces and they all loved them but I had to give them all the blankets at the same time, my sister has issues). I would time it by the wedding (we have had a couple of failed engagements in my family). I'd do the card suggestion and then gift the blankets shortly after the weddings.
Interesting. I am going to look into this.
Is this something you actually want to do? I understand wanting to carry on the tradition, but it wasn’t one that you began, and two blankets per couple is a pretty significant amount of time and labor. I would be thinking about maybe altering the tradition to one blanket to be shared by each couple unless there’s another family member that can take on a reasonable amount of the work. I would *definitely* alter the tradition and do one blanket for couples who aren’t actually part of the family that started the tradition- it’s nice of you to make things for your boyfriend’s family, and they can be your family too, but they definitely would not have any expectations of being part of that tradition!
Instead of two full sized blankets for each couple, make two half blankets and sew them together (and then pretend it's symbolic of the couple coming together rather than a way to reduce the labour!) I would also pick something that works up fast, like a granny square or anything in chunky yarn Depending on how fast you are and what yarn you use, you could bang one out in a weekend, I bet
honestly, a chunky granny square might be the perfect move! the heirloom pattern is a relatively simple one since my great grandmother had a LOT of grandkids so i’m not too worried about that one
Don't do blankets for your boyfriends siblings. That's too much.
Or at least push it back a year for them…
The boyfriend curse is a thing--I wouldn't want to expand it to his family as well 😅 (especially if their desire/appreciation for an afghan is unknown).
i’ve had the boyfriend curse get me in the past! thankfully he wears all the sweaters i’ve made him and there’s no such thing as the boyfriends sister curse
I think do it in order of engagement, because you say the blankets are for the engagements. If this is a familiar tradition and everyone knows that all these engagements piled up, unless your family is full of jerks I am sure they will understand the fact that it takes time to make them. The idea of a little card with a "preview" blanket is genius, and yeah if anyone gets entitled about their "owed" blanket, they probably don't deserve one.
you can just take your time! my SIL makes all of us sweaters when we hit birthday milestones and she made her dad's two years late, and it was fine. also, big chunky yarn is your friend. unless you need a specific weight for the heirloom pattern (which is so cool!!!!) but even then I think it'd be cool to put your own spin on it.
Can you just make them smaller blankets. And choose a stitch that is very easy for you. For me a continuous granny square blanket Is the easiest and fastest. I can crank one out in a few days. Max a week. I use a larger hook than the yarn suggested which makes it quicker. You can also time them by the wedding and don't take much pressure. You are only human and have two hands. I'm sure everyone will understand.
I am curious what the Heirloom pattern looks like. How big? Can you share or is it a family secret?
Same! I love the idea of all the babies getting the same 'family pattern.'
Yes! I’ll try and find a photo of it but for similarities sake, this is a photo of something similar https://preview.redd.it/ixg969ofskbd1.jpeg?width=732&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7640249c8a33da5e9b2be2ae9d38939d3f1d50f8 this one is by the purple poncho according to the watermark and my great grandmothers pattern varies slightly and has a specific border but it’s a basic pineapple pattern at its core
I would make them in order of who got engaged first. Since this is a family tradition I’m assuming it’s not a secret. So, you work on them as you can without pressure and tell them you’ll get one when you get one. 🤷🏻♀️ When I first read your post I’ll admit I was a little jealous at the idea of having 8 blankets that need making. Then I remembered the anxiety that would cause me and I’m glad I’m not in that position. lol
Right!! both terrifying and exciting! i’m taking full creative freedom in four of them too!! it’s a chance to do patterns i’ve wanted to try but had no motivation for. tbh the person with the furthest away wedding might end up with a persian tiles afghan because i’ve been DYING to make it
Back in 2022, I promised my 4 grown children, my son-in-law, and my 2 grandchildren that they were all getting blankets for their birthdays! 7 blankets to make, and I am still a beginner, lol. I got over whelmed and just stopped. This year, I have made 5 blankets and am working on the 6th. I spent 4 months cranking out the first 5, and the last 2 are due in October and November. I figure that if I do 2 or 3 rows a day that I will finish on time. I love the card idea, so they know it is coming, just not when. Do what you can, when you can. Good people will appreciate your effort, and be patient.
Take your time! I have become the work mom where I work all my coworkers get a baby blanket. We had so many pregnancies at the same time I couldn’t keep up. I did start making giant grannies and call the midwife is another favorite. I started going thru my stash and just making blankets to be prepared. Then I had rotator cuff surgery my own daughter got a pre made and my boss got a not that said as soon as I could I would make hers she was very thankful for that. So her shower she got a card and a copy of “Good night moon” my favorite children’s book.
An IOU card was suggested which while lovely is really only a short term fix. Given you are also expected to do blankets for births, there's a non-zero chance you'll still be working through this lot when the next baby comes around There is a longer term solution, to make this sustainable: Other family members need to learn to crochet. Families expand over time (usually), so with each generation there's more people to make blankets for. Therefore, at some point it's going to be impossible for a single person to keep up. The solution is that the tradition becomes a *family* tradition and you all share the load.
I'm curious on what they are for engagement & not for the actual wedding? I love the family heirloom thyme, but think that it could be altered to couples for wedding gifts. Since this tradition went from 3 crafters to 1 is a ton of pressure. Good luck! You will come up with what works best for you!
If it helps, official etiquette is that wedding gifts can be given for up to a year after the ceremony. I think this originated when news and packages could take months to travel, but it remains the rule today.
I made 8 blankets over the course of about 6 months but some where larger and more detailed than others but I definitely stayed up some nights later than I normally would.
When I had my 2nd child in 2021, my sil gave me a gift with a card that had a handmade "coupon" for a baby item of my choice for her to knit for me (I've yet to cash in bc she experienced childloss and I know it'd be really hard for her to do) maybe you could do something like that? Get what you can done, and give others "coupons" for their blankets so you aren't so stressed about trying to finish that many in such a small time frame
I'm probably the worst person to ask but I give handmade things late, maybe even years late 🙈 I don't even care 😂🤣😂 Be honest just say you don't have the time they will receive it eventually then go put your feet up. I made my sister a bag with fabric I bought her four years ago & my crochet isn't anymore up-to-date 🤭 You are supposed to enjoy your hobbies & the timeline you have set yourself my needs to be extended.
It might be time to let this tradition go. You may end up with tennis elbow trying to crochet that many blankets.
I made afghans for everyone in my family one year, and my husband's in another year. Each one was unique. However, it's a lot of yarn and even using discount yarn, the cost can be a lot. Everyone seemed happy with their gifts. But this was something I liked to do. If this is onerous, and if you can afford it, buy some homemade afghans. Maybe make baby afghans instead for the babies when they are born. Start now, and put aside until you need them.
A few options: * Tell each couple there's a new family tradition where you have to be engaged 5 years before you can get married. And nobody is allowed to have a baby before they get married either. That should give you plenty of time to get all the blankets made before they get married and you have to start thinking any more blankets for newborns. * Just make granny square blankets and call upon r/crochet to crowdsource you some squares. * Teach them all to crochet and then they can make each others blankets. It's their own silly fault for all getting engaged together anyway. And the most serious (AKA most boring) option: * Tell them you're happy to carry on the tradition but they probably won't all get their blankets on time. Maybe focus on the partners first as you've already said the blood relatives have a blanket from when they were born? Or pick favourites... maybe accept bribes to bump people up the queue? Teaching some family members to crochet might actually be a good idea. With so many people getting married, there's a strong chance they're going to be having babies at similar times too so you're going to be overworked again.
they’ve all been notified 🤣 i’ve told them all to hold their babies in for at LEAST ten months as well 🤣
How about gathering the new family members and teach them how to make the blanket, and then they each make and gift one blanket to each other (or to their spouse??) Sort of make it a bonding activity while simultaneously passing down the tradition. Or would that not work with the tradition or their schedules?
Change the tradition to a smaller crochet gift of their choosing. Find two other people in the family who wanna learn and wanna help. Or one couple gets one blanket. If they're getting married , why does each person need their own blanket?
Could your aunt help by making some of the blankets? Since this is a tradition she has passed on to you, maybe she would be willing to help make the blankets. That being said, traditionally, you have up to a year after the wedding to give them a gift. If that helps at all. I would go by who is getting married first, because the first couple that got engaged might be waiting years before they actually get married.
According to Etiquette Rules: it is acceptable to give a wedding gift any time from the announcement of the wedding up until the first anniversary. So you have x + one year per blanket, if you so choose to carry on this tradition.
I think this is an amazing tradition, but as folks have mentioned you can also make choices. I get wanting the FO by the wedding. Do you have to? No! You get to make the rules as the bearer of the tradition.
Sounds like your aunt has a tradition, not you. Boundaries are healthy for a reason.
If you use chunky homespun yarn and an N hook with a basic pattern, that works up in like 6 hours. I think giving them a card explaining the tradition, and how that means you have to make 8 blankets which is time-consuming so they won't get their blankets YET and in the meantime if they have any colors they like, please tell you would be good? Also I think I would maybe do 4 blankets and do the other 4 as an anniversary gift or something?
I feel your pain at the moment. My next door neighbor just delivered twins and our only friend couple in this town now have two more grandbabies on the way. Their first is still obsessed with the blanket I made for her birth over two years ago, so I obviously have to make them for their cousins. Also, my neighbor is an amazing woman… and all babies need fluffy warm blankets and stuffies to match. So, I completed two blankets and two stuffies on the day last week that the neighbor’s twins were delivered, and just finished with the second of two more blankets last night. Started working on the two stuffies today. Hoping for the best, as the baby shower is coming up next week! My hands hurt.
You may want to consider passing the tradition to a couple more of your cousins. Especially as the babies start cranking out, it’s going to be exponentially harder for you to keep up than it was for the generation above you because the family is growing.
If you can’t get them all done it time, I would at least do one blanket for each couple in order of soonest wedding. If you finish those four, start the blankets for their partners. It would be your discretion if you give it to the partner you are related to first of each couple or to their partner. But I would keep consistency with each couple. If you choose the one you’re related to for one couple, choose that person for all of them. That way you hopefully can give a gift to every wedding and have extra time to complete the second blankets as needed.
My one aunt used to make quilts for all of her nieces and nephews when they graduated HS. Well, 6 of us (I think) graduated within 5 years of each other. We knew that we weren’t getting them on time. I just thought it was sweet that she did it at all!
My one aunt used to make quilts for all of her nieces and nephews when they graduated HS. Well, 6 of us (I think) graduated within 5 years of each other. We knew that we weren’t getting them on time. I just thought it was sweet that she did it at all!
My one aunt used to make quilts for all of her nieces and nephews when they graduated HS. Well, 6 of us (I think) graduated within 5 years of each other. We knew that we weren’t getting them on time. I just thought it was sweet that she did it at all!
My one aunt used to make quilts for all of her nieces and nephews when they graduated HS. Well, 6 of us (I think) graduated within 5 years of each other. We knew that we weren’t getting them on time. I just thought it was sweet that she did it at all!
My one aunt used to make quilts for all of her nieces and nephews when they graduated HS. Well, 6 of us (I think) graduated within 5 years of each other. We knew that we weren’t getting them on time. I just thought it was sweet that she did it at all!