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KeepingDankMemesDank

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Previous_Insurance13

Cops in India are the monitors in class who wouldn't write names of their friends.


strippermonopoly

This is so accurate. Its not even a joke.


EnLitenPerson

Maybe it's just because english isn't my first language but I don't get it? Monitors? Writing friends names?


LostInOuterSpace7

Class captain/president are sometimes referred to as a 'monitor' in the indian sub-continent. And they do the job of 'monitoring', so it makes sense in a way. The writing friends' name part is when teacher leaves classroom for something and puts the monitor in charge of maintaining the class. Monitors are allowed to write down names of most disruptive students (who will later be punished by the teacher). Here, the monitors ignore their friends even if they do deserve the punishment. Corruption, in simpler terms... šŸ˜…


EnLitenPerson

Thanks for the explanation!


ColHunterGathers111

Am I bad, am I Batman or am I a bastard for writting my friends names? Pro-tip: Was not educated in the algo-saxon derived teaching method. But to be fair, the other students didn't knew we had the power to monitor them. Monitors were usually picked in secret. Brazilian Censor/Spy rules 101.


Crystal42069

You have class monitors that are students appointed by teachers. They write down the names of other students who are mischievous in class and give them to the teacher later on


RaoulDukeRU

I thought it was a reference to loyalty at first. So it didn't made sense to me. But I'm from a country _(Germany)_ where corruption with _"street level"_ cops is basically non-existent. There's no way you could bribe yourself out of a ticket for driving to fast. Maybe with ā‚¬50.000 and the cop is alone _(which they never are)._ Of course it has some positive sides when you have corrupt cops. But overall it's definitely better to have a police force which isn't corrupt overall. I don't know how what the higher ups, undercover cops or cops involved in organized crime do.


ColHunterGathers111

Mr. Duke, we meet again. Thanks for the notes on how to bribe german cops: *"always catch the fuckers alone and with large sums of money"* From one HST avatar to another, I tip my hat to you.


RaoulDukeRU

And if you roll down your window, don't answer the cop with: _"Hello officer. My name is Raoul Duke. Free lunch, final wisdom, total coverage!"_ This could prevent from getting [intimate with a lonely cop](https://youtu.be/b8YnrQQ4ki4?si=TOBvKkBiIxaJfuOE) or your trunk getting searched. Gonzo's unit āœŠšŸ»


ColHunterGathers111

To me it seems Cops in India would be the monitors who'd write the names of their friends, then slap/hit 'em with a stick afterwards. I assume hitting people with a stick as a reflex is mandatory for police admission.


Phat22

Cops in Australia are the kids who saw you do sketchy shit and didnā€™t say nothing


AIRd2304

It makes them good cops But because they're in Australia, it's upside down. Therefore bad cops


AadamAtomic

Nah. They are just upside cops from your local view. If you travel to Australia they're right side up. Time/spaces is relative.


Bors-The-Breaker

If you say so, Einstein


AadamAtomic

Einstein didn't 1. Win a Nobel Prize for his theory of relativity. 2. Learn to swim. 3. Excel in all school subjects. 4. Obtain his doctoral degree with his Theory of Relativity. 5. Or Master the art of driving. I know how to swim, I know how to drive, I was a straight A student in all subjects, I'm pretty much Einstein myself. You can even ask my mom.


ColHunterGathers111

Alright Einstein 2.0, give me the answer to the N-Body Problem and we can all go home unharmed *(points shotgun)* ... and God and HP Lovecraft forbid me if you use the Occam's Razor and tell me the body with least mass would naturally gravitate around the body with most mass. *(re-racks shotgun, points it again)*


AadamAtomic

**destroys all but 2 of the masses* Problem solved.


VVizardVVeedVendor

Except with the portal problem, it šŸ’Æ% just plops out the other side.


AadamAtomic

The cake is a lie and your portals upside down. It's like looking into a false mirror.


ChadKnightArtist

Upside down cake joke here


ColHunterGathers111

However, as everyone whose watched the credits to the end know: The cake wasn't a lie.


TheWarTorn

They also ignore the massive mafia in Australia so.


ColHunterGathers111

Are those the one who firebombed friendlyjordies house? Or just scummy politicians? See, this is we need Batman Incorporated. Edit: Or at least, the ICA.


Mr_Zoovaska

Both I think. He did an exposƩ of sorts on a scummy politician who was in the pockets of organised crime groups. Said organised crime groups didn't like that.


TheWarTorn

The answer in reality is simply yes.


ColHunterGathers111

But what if we are the upside down one from them? Hence, good cops. Edit: Also never saw a upside-up cop do a Haka, so that goes as positive karma points in my book.


Calmandpeace

They use that discretion very liberally


skillywilly56

Cops in Australia are the kids who bullied others and liked to watch while their mates beat up the black kid.


TonyAioli

Uhhā€¦.no. US cops were not the cool kids who snuck away to smoke. They were the dudes who won dodgeball and struggled to pass algebra.


Slight_Concert6565

I don't see an American cop beating anyone at dodgeball. Or any other sport for that matter.


ZPortsie

They were all going to go pro for football until they all had a knee injury


Slight_Concert6565

Yeah that's more fitting.


ARANDOMNAMEFORME

Like that one guard in Skyrim who took an arrow to his knee.


Education_Aside

I would have been a pro football player like yourself until I had a blown ACL tear on my knee.


potato-overlord-1845

Speedhawk?


frog_boyyy

there are absolutely many out of shape american cops, however there are still a ton of stupid meatheads.


essensiedashuhn

Literally the only 2 choices. Pretty sure my area is mostly meatheads.


cavscout55

The out of shape ones are the wannabe meatheads. The jocks that had power in high school and the outcasts that craved the power the jocks had both went on to become cops. The jocks just kept in shape and resent their out of shape colleagues.


J_train13

I dunno, American cops do seem to have a lot of experience beating people


bialetti808

US cops were beating up black kids in high school


bialetti808

Too soon?


Winter2712

They sure have image of being worse then cats - lot more scared of random sounds - lot of collateral damage and just walking away like "what? Did i do something wrong? It had no value anyway" - getting treats after "mistake" - playing with their prey(generally includes choking, neckstand, head on ground, groundslam and a lot of planting evidence even after having bodycam)


g_r_e_y

idk about you guys, but it was not the cool kids in my school who skipped class to smoke. those were the losers.


depersonalised

burnouts do not become cops. itā€™s a natural law man.


g_r_e_y

in case you're not kidding, you'd be surprised lol


[deleted]

Yeah where did op get that it makes no sense. Also I struggled to pass algebra now I use algebra and geometry every day.


RManDelorean

Hahaha that's perfect! But they weren't quite winning dodgeball either, like 5th left standing


OldSchool_Ninja

I usually see them as the bullies that couldn't hack life after school and probably dropped out of the military but still want some form of authority.


Hunter042005

It depends on the cop tho itā€™s not so black and white like I know a guy who was a computer science major in college with straight Aā€™s and a super nerdy guy and decided after college to become a cop after college so it just depends on the person


Steezie_E

JV football team, or LaCrosse.


depersonalised

and made bad taste jokes under their breath during history class.


DepressoEspresso55

Kids who peaked in high school and never left their hometown


mg31415

What's cool about smoking?


aLittleDarkOne

My friend said she hates cops and I was like why, cause they gave her a ticket for riding the skytrain workout a valid ticketā€¦ okay??? Iā€™m convinced a lot of people who hate cops are just weird people who break the law. Letā€™s hold cops who do wrong accountable but them ticketing you for breaking the law is what they are supposed to doā€¦


MyDickKilledEpstein

And when shit goes wrong for them they will be the first ones to call the police.


blut-baron

I remember once a little Kid to hit by a driving Bus, the Kid was ok, luckily,but they still had to call the cops. I remember that some of the kids in the buss where screaming ACAB and insulting the Cops šŸ¤·


MyDickKilledEpstein

My dad was a police officer and a damn good one. Worked in a rough neighborhood and always brought the kids candy and drinks. Saved lives and experienced things that would break a lot of people in the name of serving the community and keeping people safe. All these losers screaming ACAB are an absolute disgrace and should be exempt from being helped by first responders. Would love to see how they do on their own.


blut-baron

I wouldn't go so far to say they should be exempt, but i didn't have your experience. All i know is that those who screamed ACAB have turned out as losers, working long shifts for small pay. Its kinda sad to watch.


MyDickKilledEpstein

Well I cant say Iā€™m surprised but yeah It is pretty sad whatā€™s happening to young people in this country. Their minds have been poisoned


Gee_Wiz1116

Thereā€™s definitely more nuance needed in ACAB, but you should also consider your experience isnā€™t universal. Iā€™m sure your dad was great but there are plenty of cops who are total scumbags. Edit: grammar


MyDickKilledEpstein

Youā€™re not fooling anyone with that shit. You canā€™t just call something nuanced because a logical argument has been made against it. ACAB stands for ALL cops are bastards. That sounds pretty universal to me. I never said there arenā€™t bad cops but it is very clear who the closed minded intolerant people are here and you arenā€™t going to convince me otherwise with this bullshit.


DerDezimator

Idk if that's the universal understanding of ACAB but I read once somewhere that the reason why it's called "All Cops" and not "Most Cops" or "Some Cops" is that good cops don't do anything against the bad cops and protect each other instead of weeding out the bad ones, making them bad as well


MyDickKilledEpstein

Well thats another lie because they do. In fact, my father was responsible for starting an investigation that led to a whole ring of dirty police officers losing their jobs. But again, this shit doesnā€™t make headlines. These people only care what the media is shoving down their throats. They eat it right up and do exactly what their tech oligarchy overlords want and call themselves ā€œwokeā€. Itā€™s the biggest joke I have ever seen. But just because you are woke doesnā€™t mean your eyes are open. You can tell me all the regurgitated excuses and explanations in the world but I see right past the bullshit. This is the true intolerance and fascism taking place in this country. The people following the national socialist party in Germany didnā€™t know they were evil, and neither do you.


DerDezimator

First of all, I'm German, I know what fascism is. Second, I didn't say that I was agreeing with that reasoning, I just wanted to hear your thoughts on it.


MyDickKilledEpstein

Okay well then I apologize for making assumptions. It sounded like you were defending ACAB. But I believe these people are brainwashed to the point where they may be capable of doing unspeakable things as we have seen throughout history.


Neko_Boi_Core

not every cop is terrible, but you shouldn't trust them implicitly. i personally prefer to take responsibility of my own personal protection, since the cops take time to arrive and by that point, the situation has already ended. thefts and attacks take seconds, but you can draw and fire a ccw in <1 second if you train, and practice.


UrdnotZigrin

Cops are minutes away when danger is seconds away


Neko_Boi_Core

correct.


MyDickKilledEpstein

I agree. I carry as well and am a firm believer in the second amendment. I believe if more GOOD people were armed then the world would be a much safer place. Sick people would be deterred from going out and indiscriminately shooting people. These gun control laws are ass backwards because all they are doing is stopping good law abiding citizens from being armed. The funny thing about deranged criminals is that they donā€™t follow laws.


Neko_Boi_Core

you're bang on. in the UK, there was recently two sword attacks, and the response was to start a debate on giving all police officers weapons, (without increased pay, of course) be it firearms, tasers etc. they're *so close* to getting it right, but the government is too scared of the people to do what *is* right. in '23 they proposed that you need a license for every firearm, rather than one for every person who owns firearms, because you can 'easily make a small arsenal'... dumbasses, the lot of 'em


MyDickKilledEpstein

The government SHOULD be afraid of its people. Thats what prevents them from becoming tyrants


Neko_Boi_Core

Yes. but they're too scared to let the people have power over them because they'd immediately be shut down. but that won't happen, protesting is illegal, being offensive is illegal, self defence is illegal, you get the picture.


MyDickKilledEpstein

Yeah your country is in serious trouble. And unfortunately mine is going down the same path


baronvonbatch

Nobody calls the cops for help. We all see what help the chickenshit bastards were in Uvalde.


MyDickKilledEpstein

Wow itā€™s amazing how one situation televised by the mainstream news propaganda has you assuming the characteristics of a whole group of people. You are so woke Police save lives heroically every single day. But that doesnā€™t make headlines


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Scrytheux

Yes and no. Obviously not every cop is bad and sone of them are even remarkable humans, but if the whole system is rotten to the point that good cops have to do awful shit... Then yeah.


gugfitufi

I had a similar look on cops for a long time, but when I moved to a city and befriended some migrants, my views have changed. Whenever we are chilling somewhere, there is the chance that a random pair of cops approach, ask for ID and shit and ask whether we were doing drugs. They always check the backpacks of my friends intensely and only give mine a quick glance. My friends are second-generation immigrants, speak the language perfectly, are studying in university with me, and have probably done fewer crimes than me. And I bet my country isn't the only one where systemic racism like that exists.


DragonLord1729

Though I understand that the cops are being biased, would you inconvenience the innocent to prevent crime or would you let criminals go to make it more pleasant for the innocent? It very much depends on what your accepted theory of justice is. For me, I'd rather let 99 criminals walk to protect one innocent person, and therefore I'd rather not have random checks at all. Other people could be strong proponents of the other way of justice and therefore want more vigilance and surveillance.


SuperKillerKitty

Stop making sense


ValenciaAue

Cops in France are the bully who kicked your ass for fun.


Slight_Concert6565

Depends on the city tho, I never had a bad experience with a cop in Montpellier but in Paris they tend to be assholes.


Speedy_V2

But their ambulances sound like 3 gay men in bed


xander012

British police are one or the other, but the armed police are decent chaps


FenixOfNafo

Almost like more trained ones are decent


xander012

Indeed, also helps they have to prove they're mentally sound and level headed!


FenixOfNafo

I also assume they (armed branch) will have much more oversight


xander012

Every bullet fired can put them out of a job, they have to be very careful and have good situational awareness. Our police also get trained primarily in how to de-escalate a situation which also plays in, but if you see armed police here it's either a) a high security location or b) shits going down


FenixOfNafo

Yup.. It be awesome if the police forces of all countries gets similar level of training and oversight


Not_Sugden

#GET DOWN ON THE FUCKING GROUND NOW DO IT


StandardN02b

"Yeah, dude. I am very funny." *political wall of text*.


ChinChengHanji

Cops in Brazil are everything the other comments are saying multiplied by six


Zakcklin

And if you complain about police brutality they'll probably beat your ass too


goatjo_enjoyer

Cops in oman do mostly nothing (the country has a very low crime rate)


LazyCasual0alt

Maybe thatā€™s because theyā€™re good at their jobs?


goatjo_enjoyer

Good point


schnitzel-kuh

cops dont really prevent crime though do they? They usually show up when a crime has already happened. Of course thats also useful but not the same thing. If you want to fight crime, you need to fight the reasons for crime, not try to intimidate people into not doing it


_JesusChrist_hentai

That's more of a sign that jail works.


your_reddit_lawyerII

Not all cops are bad. Some are, and the relative amount of cops that's bad differs from place to place. There's good ones too though.


_JesusChrist_hentai

I think it's an universal fact that bad cops are noisier than the good ones though.


longingrustedfurnace

Then it should be easy for the good cops to root them out.


_JesusChrist_hentai

Observation bias.


AccomplishedForearm

In Britain itā€™s either way. Some are great people you can share a pint with during a protest, others are the kids who will tell on you for writing the letter L wrong.


nuthatch_282

What about cops from the shadow proclamation?


ThickWeatherBee

Why they are the NICEST and TRUSTWORTHY and NOT TRIGGER HAPPY fellas I ever met!!!


Mohammedamine9

Mo do jo bro go sho


ThickWeatherBee

Who are you who is so wise in the ways of linguistics?


lyfthyco123

Cops in UK will announce every 3-4years that theyā€™ve found a clue to Madeleine McCann in a tropical holiday destination and will use public funds to send a team away on some much needed respite and a break from the usual fuckall


JustRyan2701

I'd rather take Germany, I feel like they won't blow my brains out for accidentally dropping an acorn.


ThickWeatherBee

I don't know... If you drop the acorn in the "keine HĆ¼lsenfrĆ¼chte!šŸ˜”" Zone you might be in for a ā‚¬20 fine and a Stern talking to! Choose Wisely...


fivefingersinyourass

Still better than USA


Thiaski

Brazilian cops are those kids who has a crazy life outside school but on school looks like everyone else.


Blankasbiscuits

When I was in Thailand, many times the cops would stop me from going into a restaurant and tell me that it's garbage and you should try these other places (almost always they were bomb). And then, I watched 2 cops beat up a flasher.


InMooseWorld

Have you seen Clock Work Orange?


Anomaly_049

Nah the homework guy is the Anzeigenhauptmeister. Fucker drives around on a bike and reports people who're wrongly parked. IN HIS FUCKING FREE TIME! HE DOESN'T GET FUCKING PAYED FOR IT AND REPEATEDLY GETS BEATEN UP!!!


ThickWeatherBee

Comments like these remind me that sometimes I hate living in Germany! But then reading the rest of his comment section reminds me that I love living in Germany!


Anomaly_049

Lmao, yeah.


TheGringoOutlaw

Well there is that old joke that says Heaven is where the cops are British and Hell is where the cops are German.


depersonalised

false meme here.


leprasson12

In Morocco, cops are like the vigilant neighbors who know everyone's business before they even leave their houses.


Mohammedamine9

Eh, more or less


WiseBelt8935

as a 25+ year old Englishmen, I've only seen one about 5 times. they mainly just come off as a bit pointless. they are nice enough but just give you a crime number and piss off. watch a guy get arrested at MacDonald for stealing a van. nobody was shot and it was done in less then a min so better then the yanks


_Vard_

OI! Do you have a loisence fer that registration permit?ā€


MyPhoneIsNotChinese

Cops in Spain are the kids who didn't do their assignments and still passed school


UnhappyPage

The US ones are just the bullies from you high school. It's literally the same people.


LairdPeon

Well, those are the two places.


friedtuna76

All humans are bad


acute_physicist

Cops in spain are the slow kids in class who were given a power such as cleaning the blackboard and felt like they were superior


FirePenguinMaster

You got a license for that question, m8?


mandy009

Based on the votes in here, cops are anything and everything. Y'all don't know jack.


zqmbgn

This post is full of hypocrisy. Whenever you have a real problem, you will call the cops and be grateful for their presence. Yet you shit on them Just because they are an authority figure and won't respond to your insults. Just like people shitting on doctors. What will be next, shitting on firefighters?


indialexjones

British police deserve to be shit on, they donā€™t actually do anything other than arrest you or mark your record for free speech they donā€™t like, something which is unfortunately not a human right over here.


FastenedCarrot

Just straight up children.


modimusmaximus

What is the name of the actress?


ThickWeatherBee

Jenna Coleman! This meme template here is from her time on Doctor Who, but I'm sure you've seen her in some production in the last few years!


Nielips

They are non-existent when you need one in Britian.


ThickWeatherBee

They're probably off on adventures in time and space or something!šŸ¤·


CallMeAQuu

Deutschland wurde erwƤhnt? Wir sind zur stelle


ThickWeatherBee

Dieser Kommentar Bereich


ColHunterGathers111

Brazilian cops are the kids who'd beat your ass, and the adolecents who'd beat your ass, and the pre-adults that would bully you in college/beat your ass in Jiu Jitsu. Hey, we have a shit aircraft/mechanized infantry, but one of the strongest and best trained infantries in the world. I guess it all pays off.


JustAThiccBoy

In Argentina they're the grown up version of those kids who couldn't do shit in class, repeated years in the primary and you doubt if they should be or not sent to special education, but they didn't and now they're cops


eceer808

ā€¦and during that period I spent most of my time as a high class muscle man for Big Business, for Wall Street and the bankers. In short, I was a racketeer, a gangster for capitalism.-Smedley D. Butler


MIKE-JET-EATER

In my experience 2/3 of police are the kid that got bullied in school and thinks being a dickhead is making the world a better place


UrdnotZigrin

Oi! You got a loicense for that wonderin'?


wktr_t

Cops in Brazil will beat you up if you're a black man who was stabbed by a white guy. https://blackbraziltoday.com/elderly-white-man-stabs-black-delivery-man-in-southern-brazil-cops-violently-subdue-black-man-take-him-to-jail/ Yep, even here cops are really... Really fucking racist...


reuelcypher

Bullies and snitches


EmvyPH

Cops in the Philippines is the grown up version of bullies blackmailing you and taking your lunch money because you didn't wear your uniform properly. Edit:Spelling


EliaO4Ita

Cops in Italy will arbitrarily ignore whatever you are doing if you stop it or just ruin your entire day


blacksad1

You got cops šŸ‘® n America wrong. They are failed Asshole Jocks. Asshole Jocks become cops. Cool Jocks become fire fighters.


HereBecauseBored

Are people who generalize bad?


bwizzel

cops bad gib updoots pls


LordCoke-16

Cops in South Africa are the kids that fell asleep in the class


Taf2499

The UK? Overall pretty decent, there are bad eyes, same as in any company or organisation but British Police are on the whole pretty decent. I worked closely with them for the best part of a decade and the dozen or so interactions had with them as a civvie either being questioned or going to them for help have been productive, respectful and pretty decent.


TheJamSams

Not sure about the rest of Britain, but in Scotland there pretty much useless ngl


Hazel-Soul

Cops in USA aren't the ones who smoked in the parking lots, they were the bullies, the kids who smoked in parking lots were depressed and usually mind their own business lol


AnimeIsMyLifeAndSoul

Cops in Britain are the kids who would sneak out of class to go drink tea and avoid dental care


The_Konigstiger

Police in Britain are too poor to do anything


Interesting_Buy6796

Germanys once are tuning into the grown up version of the bullied weird kid ready for revenge


CyberShiroGX

Cops in South Africa just looking for a Bribe to look the other way


ElonMusketatelondusk

["Oi! 'Ave yew got a license for that?"](https://youtu.be/rNESbiocPuA?si=yncNsk5bdi4v6u1Q)


indialexjones

Oh theyā€™re bad in the uk alright just not shoot you for twitching bad. Theyā€™ll happily arrest you for ā€œoffensive languageā€ in either a tweet someone didnā€™t like or you simply re-tweeting something can be reported anonymously to get a permanent ā€˜non crime hate incidentā€™ on your record that employers can see, training a pug to do a nazi salute and thereā€™s kinda the fact that their response times are measured in hours not minutes, as well as the fact that they donā€™t actually solve like any crimes. Something like 90% of burglaries go unsolved.


ColHunterGathers111

Kids who said they didn't get homework: "I wanna pass this class, better test myself. No I don't care what others think." Kids who smoked in the parking lot: "I don't care if I pass this class, no I don't wanna test myself. I want to look good because what matters is what others think!" Same kind of diagnosis, different pathologies, different power-trip = different police. Can't remember the last time a german officer knelt on a black man's throat. Seems people just wanna hate police for the sake of hating police (unless someone is doing something against you, then you call them.).


TNTwaviest

Personally only had very good experiences with every interaction from British police. I live in a fairly affluent area with not much crime so might be something to do with it, but even when I lived in more rough parts never had a bad experience.


Carolina-Roots

If cops skipped class to smoke then we would get along so much betterā€¦


GoldenGecko100

British cops are overall pretty good in my experience. Polite, professional, well trained. Although we do have issues with the London MET, but that's London, always been a shithole.


TomaszA3

The answer is never you useless asshole. Y'all are strucking me a nerve with those. If you had to live in a world without cops for 30 seconds you'd have cried to have them back. And don't try to tell me "just because of some we need to say all" or "most cops are xyz" or anything like that because it's either straight up lies or the dumbest the most illogical ideas ever.


EvilsystemDK

This take is braindead.


CaptainUSSRthe1

Diese Kommentarsektion ist nun Eigentum der Bundesrepublik Deutschland


allknownthings

Israeli police would beat you in full body armour and arrest you just for looking at them the wrong way (you are a Palestinian child walking back from school).


-TheManInTheChair

'I've always had good experiences with cops!' *Survivorship bias intensifies*


TanyaMKX

The overwhelming majority of people have


Corrupted_soull

Ah yes. Because they always are trigger happy. Totally not a US thing... Right? (And not even as true as the stereotypes make you believe) /Totally not dripping sarcasm


KINGram14

All cops are bad because they protect the interests of capital by beating the shit out of protester/strikers and enforcing unjust laws, not because of whatever the fuck you said


StolenValourSlayer69

Lmao, do you not understand why tankies like you are called tankies? You didnā€™t exactly treat workers much better Edit: spelling of tankies, idk what the fuck autocorrect thought I was trying to say


Charge092744

Fun fact, cops don't beat up protesters/strikers. They remove criminals. Maybe don't break the law and you'll be okay?? Protesting is legal. Breaking into buildings, stealing things, blocking traffic, and burning buildings to the ground are not.


TheRealBertoltBrecht

They uphold the law, and the law is for the protection of people and property