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Even if she is doubting herself and her availability, believe her when she says, don’t wait for her. This doesn’t necessarily mean a forever never, but waiting for her is the other extreme of forever never and in my experience, behavioural extremes get in the way of experiencing lives joys.
Basically don’t throw your future away for her. Get on with your life and be open to meeting other women with the characteristics you love in this one. And keep getting to know this one and growing your friendship.
I've been thinking about it this morning, I know I need to move on. Because either she is telling me truthfully that she simply isn't available to date, in which case how she feels about me is irrelevant right now, or she is letting me down gently. I've already decided I want to stay on as friends so I should move forward in that regard.
I guess time will give me the answer eventuall. Either she asks me out again at some point in the future or tells me she's met someone else.
Take her words at face value, but don't be her friend either unless you're absolutely sure you can handle that. Unless there was truly a pre-existing friendship, being "friends" after a rejection generally isn't fair to the person who was rejected.
I've been friend zoned before, and yes, after that, the conversation fizzled out because we weren't really friends to begin with, just flirty. With this girl, though, we went right back to chatting and gaming afterwards, and she has continued to message me with no change in pace. We got back on to the subject last night and she said she wanted me to tell her about my feelings on the matter. (I didn't want to drag it out and sound needy). I said ill deal with it the best way. I'll work on myself. She said I don't need to change anything about myself. I ended up asking her directly, if she had time to date, would we still be dating? She said yes 100% and that she hadn't stopped fancying me.
Only you know the dynamics of your relationship, and perhaps I'm a bit more cynical than you, but it honestly sounds to me like she just wants to keep you on standby while having no obligations or committment toward you. Generally speaking if a woman really likes a guy she'll make time for him.
If you truly are OK with being just friends with her, there's nothing wrong with that, but pretending to be friends while still holding out hope for something more isn't fair to you or her. Just make sure you're being honest with yourself about what you want out of this relationship.
Welcome to /r/dating_advice! Please keep the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/about/rules/) of /r/dating_advice in mind while participating here. Try your best to be kind. Report any rule-breaking behavior to the moderators using the report button. If it's urgent, [send us a message.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fdating_advice) We rely on user reports to find rule-breaking behavior quickly. Thanks! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/dating_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
That’s girlspeak for no, +you’ve been friendzoned
Move on. She is tryna let u down Easy. Don’t focus any energy on her. Stop chatting. Focus ur energy on someone else.
Even if she is doubting herself and her availability, believe her when she says, don’t wait for her. This doesn’t necessarily mean a forever never, but waiting for her is the other extreme of forever never and in my experience, behavioural extremes get in the way of experiencing lives joys. Basically don’t throw your future away for her. Get on with your life and be open to meeting other women with the characteristics you love in this one. And keep getting to know this one and growing your friendship.
I've been thinking about it this morning, I know I need to move on. Because either she is telling me truthfully that she simply isn't available to date, in which case how she feels about me is irrelevant right now, or she is letting me down gently. I've already decided I want to stay on as friends so I should move forward in that regard. I guess time will give me the answer eventuall. Either she asks me out again at some point in the future or tells me she's met someone else.
Take her words at face value, but don't be her friend either unless you're absolutely sure you can handle that. Unless there was truly a pre-existing friendship, being "friends" after a rejection generally isn't fair to the person who was rejected.
I've been friend zoned before, and yes, after that, the conversation fizzled out because we weren't really friends to begin with, just flirty. With this girl, though, we went right back to chatting and gaming afterwards, and she has continued to message me with no change in pace. We got back on to the subject last night and she said she wanted me to tell her about my feelings on the matter. (I didn't want to drag it out and sound needy). I said ill deal with it the best way. I'll work on myself. She said I don't need to change anything about myself. I ended up asking her directly, if she had time to date, would we still be dating? She said yes 100% and that she hadn't stopped fancying me.
Only you know the dynamics of your relationship, and perhaps I'm a bit more cynical than you, but it honestly sounds to me like she just wants to keep you on standby while having no obligations or committment toward you. Generally speaking if a woman really likes a guy she'll make time for him. If you truly are OK with being just friends with her, there's nothing wrong with that, but pretending to be friends while still holding out hope for something more isn't fair to you or her. Just make sure you're being honest with yourself about what you want out of this relationship.