I really understand Barry though. Some really negative experiences DMing... like clear player malice and vindictiveness are hard to get over. Hope he'll try again for some trusted people some time... and hope someone poisons Joe... eerr... bans him from D&D for life? That's probably a better response.
I'm glad that you kicked Joe out, but let Barry know that next time, you'll be there as his player and support him. Hopefully he'll get past the trauma Joe put on him.
I don't usually like advocating for violence against other people, but it sounds like Joe is well overdue for a swift kick in the balls from everyone in your group, and maybe two from Barry.
I saw this happen once, as a forever DM playing as a player. It's heartbreaking to watch the virgin flames of a potential DM be extinguished, especially when it's intentional. I'll never understand anyone doing that. It is WAY easier to be a player. Learning to DM is hard, even with the full support and encouragement or your players. Sabotaging someone like that is just an asshole thing to do.
Being a player is much, much easier, and should be considered a privilege. I'm glad you kicked them out of your campaign, especially knowing that they thought they were justified.
I really hope the potential DM tries again. I'm sure, with your support, the experience will be much more positive.
To clarify. you don't, REALLY DON'T, want to be playing with a player that engages in such toxic, manipulative and immature way. This goes ~~SQUARED~~ CUBED when is done willingly. You don't care about group dynamic, you don't care about party composition, your only answer to being called a bad DM is : "Yes I am a bad DM, and you (Joe) are still out of the game". Don't engage to further explain or even elaborate. He is out, no questions answered. Don't engage, cause you will open yourself to gaslighting. If all the other players threaten to leave along him, let them disband the party. If they want to play they will return. Either way your peace of mind is more important. Cause now that you know Joe to have no qualms doing that on purpose, you will never know when will he do so on you next.
We actually had a similar thing happen recently. Unfortunately my group is never going to kick the problem player out because we've known him for thirty years. Now the guy who DMed has said he's never going to again and he's never going to play a character the party needs, he's only going to play and do what he wants to. So he's becoming toxic himself
It's pretty much the only time each week I get to see friends other than my wife. So it's a situation where I grin and bear it and complain elsewhere 😂
I feel genuinely bad for Barry that he was essentially bullied out of trying something new by a player who seemingly didn't even have beef with him specifically; just with the concept of playing D&D as a whole. Good on you for kicking Joe out because he seems like a fucking asshole, and maybe try to get the other players to tell Barry that he should give DMing another shot. But obviously also give Barry some time to recover after dealing with That Guy.
Apparently Joe is 5 years old mentally.
I really understand Barry though. Some really negative experiences DMing... like clear player malice and vindictiveness are hard to get over. Hope he'll try again for some trusted people some time... and hope someone poisons Joe... eerr... bans him from D&D for life? That's probably a better response.
I'm glad that you kicked Joe out, but let Barry know that next time, you'll be there as his player and support him. Hopefully he'll get past the trauma Joe put on him.
I've seen that happen before. A new DM wanting to try it out and a problem player or group ruins it.
I don't usually like advocating for violence against other people, but it sounds like Joe is well overdue for a swift kick in the balls from everyone in your group, and maybe two from Barry.
Kick Joe from all games. Maybe once he's in no games at all, he'll learn that deliberately fucking up a game for selfish reasons was a bad move.
i feel sorry for Barry that he had to deal with Joe... Joe doesn't deserve to be in anyones game..
I saw this happen once, as a forever DM playing as a player. It's heartbreaking to watch the virgin flames of a potential DM be extinguished, especially when it's intentional. I'll never understand anyone doing that. It is WAY easier to be a player. Learning to DM is hard, even with the full support and encouragement or your players. Sabotaging someone like that is just an asshole thing to do. Being a player is much, much easier, and should be considered a privilege. I'm glad you kicked them out of your campaign, especially knowing that they thought they were justified. I really hope the potential DM tries again. I'm sure, with your support, the experience will be much more positive.
KICK JOE THE F OUT OF YOUR OWN CAMPAIGN
I did, i did mention it in the post.
To clarify. you don't, REALLY DON'T, want to be playing with a player that engages in such toxic, manipulative and immature way. This goes ~~SQUARED~~ CUBED when is done willingly. You don't care about group dynamic, you don't care about party composition, your only answer to being called a bad DM is : "Yes I am a bad DM, and you (Joe) are still out of the game". Don't engage to further explain or even elaborate. He is out, no questions answered. Don't engage, cause you will open yourself to gaslighting. If all the other players threaten to leave along him, let them disband the party. If they want to play they will return. Either way your peace of mind is more important. Cause now that you know Joe to have no qualms doing that on purpose, you will never know when will he do so on you next.
We actually had a similar thing happen recently. Unfortunately my group is never going to kick the problem player out because we've known him for thirty years. Now the guy who DMed has said he's never going to again and he's never going to play a character the party needs, he's only going to play and do what he wants to. So he's becoming toxic himself
So kick him anyway. 30 years and still an ass is more reason not less
I have advocated for that and been shot down so I just keep my mouth shut
Sometimes no D&D is better than bad D&D.
It's pretty much the only time each week I get to see friends other than my wife. So it's a situation where I grin and bear it and complain elsewhere 😂
It's pretty much the only time each week I get to see friends other than my wife. So it's a situation where I grin and bear it and complain elsewhere
I feel genuinely bad for Barry that he was essentially bullied out of trying something new by a player who seemingly didn't even have beef with him specifically; just with the concept of playing D&D as a whole. Good on you for kicking Joe out because he seems like a fucking asshole, and maybe try to get the other players to tell Barry that he should give DMing another shot. But obviously also give Barry some time to recover after dealing with That Guy.
Have you suggested he do a 1 on 1 session?