I’m a boomer and a grooming shop owner and I have never treated my groomers or even the bathers the way you’ve been treated. I think what you’re describing in your boss is a shitty person who doesn’t care about other people and has nothing to do with their age.
Oh I’m not at all offended, sorry it came off that way. I was just saying that you have a shitty boss who’s age is irrelevant. I’m not sure where you live but here in NY shops are begging for experienced groomers. Try to get your confidence up so you can find a shop that appreciates you!
yeah, shes always been pretty shitty. its been years of getting my feelings hurt and missing out and honestly thinking i was the problem.. and basing my life off of not wanting to be inconvenient.. my aunt (by marriage) has always worked there too, and her lack of support also made me feel this strong sense of “it is what it is” instead of standing up for myself. if family is letting this happen, then it must be okay right?
and it feels good to have support that its not just “she taught me good work ethics”
Sounds like its time to start establishing difficult boundaries, or find a new shop. Either way, I know its hard but you can do it! It's worth it I swear
thank you 💜 i know it will be once i’m on my own.. and thats what i’m working on. working on building my own shop is that hard work that ends up feeling good.. not like how i’ve been feeling.
I totally get where you're coming from and I really feel for you. The anxiety, the torn between, I have to be there for my family, but I can't take time off work because they'll be mad and they need me. The battle of trying not to upset your boss.
They will survive, others may not.
The fear they put in me was so unfair, until one day I got a call that my grandfather didn't have long, literally. I knew he was in hospital a couple of days beforehand and I lived two hours away and I should have left then. I left, I reached the hospital as he took his last breath. I hope he knew I was there. I felt so guilty.
From that day forward, nothing stands in my way, for any emergency, work can go get stuffed. They are purely just being selfish, like you stated COLD HEARTED. It's not your fault.
Always look after yourself.
This toxic workload is common in a lot of workplaces but seriously so rampant in the service industry. The world will keep turning if someone's dog can't get a haircut. There is legitimately no reason for your boss or a client to be THAT upset that they had to be rescheduled. Sometimes your body needs a break. This job is very labor intensive. If you don't take a break, your body will make you. It's okay to not live for the sole purpose of working and generating revenue like our companies want us to. Life is about LITERALLY everything else and work is just a means to pay for that. Call out if you're feeling bad. Call out if there's a life changing emergency happening for a friend or relative. Use all of your vacation days and don't answer when they call or text you on your days off. ESPECIALLY when they treat you that way. I'm sorry about your work experience OP, I hope you can find somewhere better with a manager who treats you like the valuable and complex human being you are.
I can relate with this SO much. I remember way back when I was first starting grooming, as a bather, I called in sick with a migraine (I've had migraines since I was little). And the shop owner reamed me out and made me feel like complete shit. Then I didn't ever ever call in sick again at any other grooming jobs for literal years Because I was stuck on that mindset too. I remember going to work when one of my dogs died, I missed a friend's funeral, I had even gone in on my vacation to groom a dog. It's a hard mindset to get out of. I realised eventually though that alot of that was from having being treated that was from shitty bosses and my clients are actually SO understanding if I need to call off out reschedule. Thankfully I'm my own boss now so I don't have anyone judging me if I do need to stay home and my clients are great. It's just a "dog haircut" at the end of the day and I've learned there is more important things in life, but it took me a long time to learn. ❤️
I’m a boomer and a shop owner, my daughter is the groomer, she doesn’t miss work but when we have a family emergency we do have to close the whole shop. She had to have emergency surgery a few years ago and I called to rearrange her grooming schedule, only one person got mad and hasn’t been back. We don’t want clients like that anyway. We do. 10 - 13 dogs a day so it’s hard to find a new appointment for them, but if it’s something that can’t be helped you have to miss work. Your boss sounds like an ass. Life happens and if they can’t reschedule your appointments, you need to find a place that will. Sorry for the loss of your mother.
I’m going to jump in here with the other boomers! As a shop owner and a groomer I would NEVER treat my staff the way you have been treated. My girls are family. You are heading towards burnout. Please take care of yourself.
My boss at PetSmart would do the same thing to me.
I don't think I ever truly called off in the 2.5 years I worked there. I tried to a few times, and ended up coming into work anyways. When I was still a floor manager, I had to come to work while I literally had no voice I was so sick. Like I actually had to strain as much as I could to have a squeaky whisper while talking to customers. I had to come to work on a day my psoriasis was so bad that my neck would start bleeding just from turning my head and I had intense, burning pain. When I was in the salon, I had to come to work on a day where I would have to frantically unhook my dog and carry it with me so I could go vomit in the garbage, and then return back to their haircut.
I requested a week off several months in advance because I was flying my nephew out to visit me (all my family is in WA and I live in Michigan now). Days before my vacation, I was begged if I could work because we were severely shorthanded on the floor due to insane call offs and last second quitting by part time associates. When I said no, I was then threatened with "you know we can just deny your vacation any time and force you to come." I said to have fun with that.
Yeah. I relate. I wasn’t allowed to go to my own Mother’s wedding because it was our “busy season” and my family should know by now that I cannot take time off work. When I had pneumonia, I got one day off to go to the hospital. Then I was back at it the next day still with a high fever. I quit grooming in shops altogether because literally every shop owner I worked for was some kind of abusive psychopath to me. (And the doodles. Too many underpriced crazy neglected doodles. I couldn’t do the doodles anymore at my age lol just a side note!)
Honestly, this sounds like my mom. I love my boss. She’s so understanding about these things and I get flabbergasted when she doesn’t tell me no.
How awful… I’m so sorry you are being treated this way. That’s unacceptable. Be kind to yourself. I hope you are able to establish boundaries… or find a better place to work at. You should be allowed to be human and not just a cog in the machine.
I had this attitude in my twenties at another job - I worked through several rounds of pneumonia that kept not healing because I was not taking the time to get better, and worked on a broken foot because getting it seen to would mean I couldn't do my job - but as I got older, and before I began my grooming career, I got the lesson that when you work a job, you aren't your employer's slave, you're providing them a service they need and pay for. Mistreating someone you need to keep your business making money is an incredibly stupid move, and unfortunately, only those who don't know any better will tolerate that shit. They got you before you had a chance to learn what abusive labor practices looked like, and that's on them. But at this point in my life, if I need time off, I'm not asking, I'm telling. I try not to take off without notice for my coworkers' and clients' sake, but I will no longer work through illnesses and emergencies just to put more money in the boss's pockets.
I’m a boomer and a grooming shop owner and I have never treated my groomers or even the bathers the way you’ve been treated. I think what you’re describing in your boss is a shitty person who doesn’t care about other people and has nothing to do with their age.
i’m so sorry if i offended! i’ll reword my post because of that!
Oh I’m not at all offended, sorry it came off that way. I was just saying that you have a shitty boss who’s age is irrelevant. I’m not sure where you live but here in NY shops are begging for experienced groomers. Try to get your confidence up so you can find a shop that appreciates you!
yeah, shes always been pretty shitty. its been years of getting my feelings hurt and missing out and honestly thinking i was the problem.. and basing my life off of not wanting to be inconvenient.. my aunt (by marriage) has always worked there too, and her lack of support also made me feel this strong sense of “it is what it is” instead of standing up for myself. if family is letting this happen, then it must be okay right? and it feels good to have support that its not just “she taught me good work ethics”
Sounds like its time to start establishing difficult boundaries, or find a new shop. Either way, I know its hard but you can do it! It's worth it I swear
thank you 💜 i know it will be once i’m on my own.. and thats what i’m working on. working on building my own shop is that hard work that ends up feeling good.. not like how i’ve been feeling.
I totally get where you're coming from and I really feel for you. The anxiety, the torn between, I have to be there for my family, but I can't take time off work because they'll be mad and they need me. The battle of trying not to upset your boss. They will survive, others may not. The fear they put in me was so unfair, until one day I got a call that my grandfather didn't have long, literally. I knew he was in hospital a couple of days beforehand and I lived two hours away and I should have left then. I left, I reached the hospital as he took his last breath. I hope he knew I was there. I felt so guilty. From that day forward, nothing stands in my way, for any emergency, work can go get stuffed. They are purely just being selfish, like you stated COLD HEARTED. It's not your fault. Always look after yourself.
This toxic workload is common in a lot of workplaces but seriously so rampant in the service industry. The world will keep turning if someone's dog can't get a haircut. There is legitimately no reason for your boss or a client to be THAT upset that they had to be rescheduled. Sometimes your body needs a break. This job is very labor intensive. If you don't take a break, your body will make you. It's okay to not live for the sole purpose of working and generating revenue like our companies want us to. Life is about LITERALLY everything else and work is just a means to pay for that. Call out if you're feeling bad. Call out if there's a life changing emergency happening for a friend or relative. Use all of your vacation days and don't answer when they call or text you on your days off. ESPECIALLY when they treat you that way. I'm sorry about your work experience OP, I hope you can find somewhere better with a manager who treats you like the valuable and complex human being you are.
I can relate with this SO much. I remember way back when I was first starting grooming, as a bather, I called in sick with a migraine (I've had migraines since I was little). And the shop owner reamed me out and made me feel like complete shit. Then I didn't ever ever call in sick again at any other grooming jobs for literal years Because I was stuck on that mindset too. I remember going to work when one of my dogs died, I missed a friend's funeral, I had even gone in on my vacation to groom a dog. It's a hard mindset to get out of. I realised eventually though that alot of that was from having being treated that was from shitty bosses and my clients are actually SO understanding if I need to call off out reschedule. Thankfully I'm my own boss now so I don't have anyone judging me if I do need to stay home and my clients are great. It's just a "dog haircut" at the end of the day and I've learned there is more important things in life, but it took me a long time to learn. ❤️
I’m a boomer and a shop owner, my daughter is the groomer, she doesn’t miss work but when we have a family emergency we do have to close the whole shop. She had to have emergency surgery a few years ago and I called to rearrange her grooming schedule, only one person got mad and hasn’t been back. We don’t want clients like that anyway. We do. 10 - 13 dogs a day so it’s hard to find a new appointment for them, but if it’s something that can’t be helped you have to miss work. Your boss sounds like an ass. Life happens and if they can’t reschedule your appointments, you need to find a place that will. Sorry for the loss of your mother.
You’re not a damn robot. Go somewhere else! My mouth dropped reading this.
I’m going to jump in here with the other boomers! As a shop owner and a groomer I would NEVER treat my staff the way you have been treated. My girls are family. You are heading towards burnout. Please take care of yourself.
My boss at PetSmart would do the same thing to me. I don't think I ever truly called off in the 2.5 years I worked there. I tried to a few times, and ended up coming into work anyways. When I was still a floor manager, I had to come to work while I literally had no voice I was so sick. Like I actually had to strain as much as I could to have a squeaky whisper while talking to customers. I had to come to work on a day my psoriasis was so bad that my neck would start bleeding just from turning my head and I had intense, burning pain. When I was in the salon, I had to come to work on a day where I would have to frantically unhook my dog and carry it with me so I could go vomit in the garbage, and then return back to their haircut. I requested a week off several months in advance because I was flying my nephew out to visit me (all my family is in WA and I live in Michigan now). Days before my vacation, I was begged if I could work because we were severely shorthanded on the floor due to insane call offs and last second quitting by part time associates. When I said no, I was then threatened with "you know we can just deny your vacation any time and force you to come." I said to have fun with that.
Yeah. I relate. I wasn’t allowed to go to my own Mother’s wedding because it was our “busy season” and my family should know by now that I cannot take time off work. When I had pneumonia, I got one day off to go to the hospital. Then I was back at it the next day still with a high fever. I quit grooming in shops altogether because literally every shop owner I worked for was some kind of abusive psychopath to me. (And the doodles. Too many underpriced crazy neglected doodles. I couldn’t do the doodles anymore at my age lol just a side note!)
Honestly, this sounds like my mom. I love my boss. She’s so understanding about these things and I get flabbergasted when she doesn’t tell me no. How awful… I’m so sorry you are being treated this way. That’s unacceptable. Be kind to yourself. I hope you are able to establish boundaries… or find a better place to work at. You should be allowed to be human and not just a cog in the machine.
I had this attitude in my twenties at another job - I worked through several rounds of pneumonia that kept not healing because I was not taking the time to get better, and worked on a broken foot because getting it seen to would mean I couldn't do my job - but as I got older, and before I began my grooming career, I got the lesson that when you work a job, you aren't your employer's slave, you're providing them a service they need and pay for. Mistreating someone you need to keep your business making money is an incredibly stupid move, and unfortunately, only those who don't know any better will tolerate that shit. They got you before you had a chance to learn what abusive labor practices looked like, and that's on them. But at this point in my life, if I need time off, I'm not asking, I'm telling. I try not to take off without notice for my coworkers' and clients' sake, but I will no longer work through illnesses and emergencies just to put more money in the boss's pockets.