Let me repeat this…EVERY WOMAN should have a trade or degree that she can support her own self financially. One of the big mistakes I made myself when I was young letting everyone talk me out of doing what I wanted…including at time college. Feel like most of my life has been spent doing what everyone else thinks will make me happy only to be unhappy. Again I say ask them who is going to pay your bills get you food and support you. I guarantee it won’t be any of the ones discouraging you to go to college. Hope I hear in the future you graduated your program and are doing well.
That’s where the audacity is! The nerve to tell you how to get your income, your finances, to do the minimum to get paid so you can give what’s left to the cult and make your self more available for them to use. When they are not the ones in your household. They will pay 0 bills and likely not help you if you fall on hard times and blame you.
Tell them Bethel is asking for medical people then watch their tune change. Of course you wont go but in 4 years who will remember? Go and enjoy your chosen profession!
Blessings from a creeper? Pedo sickos all of them!!! Get away from that weirdo!!
This. I’m so eternally grateful that I went to college for a decent paying career. Even as a single woman in her 20’s I haven’t had difficulty leaving from the financial standpoint. Set yourself up for success in the real world as much as humanly possible
Don’t listen to these morons. I made that mistake and although I make a good living it has been challenging without a degree. Do you and don’t look back.
You should absolutely pursue your goals! Even though I'm a little older than some (21), I've worked hard to go after my goal, which is getting into a great uni in spite of everything. Also, what you say about the creepy older person trying to groom you (because that's what he's trying) from 16 is disturbing as hell... but sadly common. This happened a few times in my hall too... even to my former best friend. It's sick and an attempt to strip away your agency in every respect. You can do this, don't let them get you
No, it's out of order and predatory, and these people have their insular morality completely twisted. I experienced similar pressures, although not as severe as I'm a guy. My best friend was a girl, and when she developed feelings, I was immediately pressured by older people and my peers to begin "courting." When I didn't want that kind of commitment, I was told, "But you made her feel comfortable." Like... yes? I provided a safe space, because she's my friend. Wtf do you expect? Somehow, to them, that meant we had to marry in the future. It's so twisted.
Edit for clarity: We were 15 and 16 too... they did this to children. They don't see limitations on innocence when it doesn't serve them.
I just find it weird how they talk about how the world pressures young ones when they’re the ones pressuring and also why were they so bent on getting y’all together 😭
The door to door work is bringing in basically no one. The numbers are primarily being replenish through born-ins. It's no wonder it's so emphasised by the elders and everyone else by extension
It’s a pressure of conformity, to be of one hive mind. Any deviation from the scripted life they have planned for you will sound warning bells the organization has installed into most all the minds of its members and they will alert those who are in charge.
However you are in charge of your own thinking and your decisions! I’m older now, and I was baptized in the religion. I now believe NO ONE should allow baptism to be a signal to others that they are in charge of a scripted life without YOUR say as to what you will do and who you will become.
I definitely wish I had set boundaries for myself as to what I would share, as well as boundaries for others.
I definitely regret baptism, because i wasn’t ready, and because, I didn’t fully understand that is was basically a contract with an organization to control my thinking, my thoughts, and my behavior, leaving death as the only graceful exit from the organization.
But I wouldn’t have the wonderful children I have.
When I was TWELVE a brother liked me. He was 19. And he was basically waiting for me to be a little older so we could date and get married. And my mom was so happy about this. There is nothing normal about this (or any) religion.
It’s not cute. Do not let anyone or anything keep you from your goal of higher education. They are not interested in keeping you “safe.” They are interested in keeping you controlled. I caved to the peer pressure, got married to the love-bombing creep, and put my education on hold. I’m divorced, thankfully, but getting back to my education has been a long process. There are many things I would change about my past, but my education is the one thing that I would go back in time for with absolute certainty. Please do not give in. I was so worried about disappointing my PIMI family. I learned far too late that I cannot live my life for others. Go to school. Go after the life you want for yourself. Be amazing.
I went to Fresno State 2014-18 (JW parents allowed that since I was still close to home) then did Grad School at Cal Poly SLO 2020-2023 and that was an even better experience since I was finally free from my parent's influence. But you will not regret it!! You will meet so many wonderful people, learn new ways of thinking and looking at things, and grow as a person. You also will be more prepared to deal with the world than you would if you stayed a JW. You'll have many more opportunities to support yourself.
The elders convinced my cousin to deny his Harvard acceptance to pursue the ministry. He's brainwashed now and just wasted such a great opportunity. Don't allow them to pull you in.
As a middle aged woman who passed up on many opportunities that could have put me in a much better financial position today, **FUCK THAT NOISE**.
None of these assholes with opinions about *your life* are ever going to pay a single bill *for you*. They are only interested in keeping you down at their level. Like crabs in a bucket, they’ll keep trying to pull you back down. Don’t let them.
This is literally the whole issue: Ask those people offering their unsolicited advice if they're willing to pay all your bills now and in the future. No? Then mind your own business! You are getting a degree in a field of your choosing in order to secure a job that will pay your bills the rest of your life. Period.
They will just tell her that brother weirdo that's a decade older will.
OP DO NOT LET THEM TALK YOU OUT OF THIS OPPORTUNITY! I speak for a ton of women that allowed this to happen to us, and we all regret it more than we could possibly explain.
I know you feel alone, but you have an entire part of the internet rooting for you. Let us know how we can help.
They're clowns the org always tells elders to discourage people from higher education but have no qualms with taking donations for their oh so amazing cause.
I hope everything goes well with your studies and you enjoy college
As someone who went to college late in life, I regretted not putting enough energy when I was 18 but I had a lot going on then, one of them was moving out to have my freedom. Don’t let them try to convince you it’s a bad idea. You will thrive so much more once you in college. I’m also in the medical field as a hospital pharmacy tech and it’s been a major blessing.
i'm SO GLAD you are not caving to this pressure. not only for your education which really matters, but for your life, which matters more. cheering you on!!!
As someone who defied the stupid noise against going to college; please don’t fold to the peer pressure from JW’s. The way a cult like JW succeeds is to keep you busy, tired, ignorant, and broke. If you go to college they can’t control you in those ways. However, be smart about your course work, major choices, and affordability of the school you choose. Medical, any engineering, and cybersecurity are great options with higher earnings potential. Ghost these naysayers and focus on the real future blessings a degree 📜 and a world of real opportunities not make believe JW stupidity & fear. Hang in there you got this.
Anything in the trades is in high demand as well. Old timers in the trades are dying off and not being replaced fast enough. Solid income as long as you don't do any work for JWs who think they are entited to a "discount"!!!
No\_Somewhere9185 - you GO FOR IT! You CAN do it!
The hypocrisy is crazy. You gotta be poor and barely get by ..... but......
I started to look around me and looking at the elite, powerful, prestigious, families in the congregation, circuit. And wealthy.
How did that family of 6 afford to buy a retirement property in another state? Dad is still an elder. He and is wife both worked full-time. But when my hubby and I both worked full-time we were criticized, considered "not good association".
How do they afford to BUILD their own homes? Live in it for a while, build another one and sell the previous? Repeatedly. Why aren't they regular pioneering instead and donating the money to the borg? (Yes, I know you can make a lot of money flipping real estate, but we are talking jw's here. And flipping real estate is very time consuming.)
How did that elderly couple afford to buy a vacation condo in another state? (NOT a time share.)
How did that other elite powerful family manage to accumulate millions, and millions of dollars in rental real estate? Not really nice houses, but what I've heard called "slum-lord rentals". (By the way, the dad was the chairman of the RBC until he had a massive, debilitating stroke.)
None of them went to college. How in the world did they get so powerful and rich in this cult? Did the parents, grandparents, great-grand parents have so much money, generational wealth, that keeps growing in perpetuity? Maybe. But...... maybe it was by renting their crappy rentals to poor jws. As jw's, they have an ending supply of needy jws looking for a job and/or a place to rent.
Greed. Double standard. Hypocrisy.
1. Go to college, follow your dreams, get away from them. My congregation was cool with education, but I was still discouraged by a dropout MS and some pioneers, elders didn't seem to mind much since most of them had degrees. I've had great experiences, fulfilling jobs and met awesome people, including my husband, thanks to engineering school. I would be stuck in the same circle had I chosen to fulfill my devoted wife's role.
2. Tell the groomer to fuck off. I dated an older guy when I was 18 and he was a nightmare. There's a reason why they can't date women their age.
It takes courage and self-esteem to put up with that pressure. Well done!
If it helps, those who criticize your decision can be referred to Awake 1998, March 8, pages 19-21, the second last paragraph, which clearly states that no one should criticize or judge your decision with regards to higher education. Yes I know the Awake is intended for the general public, but you don't have to tell them that. It still counts as "spiritual food".
Read the Nov 1 1992 WT study
They had mentioned Daniel and his 3 friends in Babylon schools
The second article also said SPECIFICALLY others should not criticize you.
Make sure you have all your ducks in a row. Fill out your FAFSA and talk to the college counselor at your school and the financial aid people at your proposed college. Given the situation, you should be able to prove no parental contribution toward your tuition and expenses. This can help you get more aid. Make sure your parents do not have access to your money by getting a new bank account.
I know it feels like everyone is against you right now. The Org made it like this on purpose to make it more difficult to branch out, grow, and try new things. You have resources available to you to help you follow your path. It will be tough, but you can do it.
Don't let them win.
You have a really good plan. And the medical field is really interesting and a very important job.
I am a Physiotherapist, some people told me it isn't a good plan, because you don't need it in paradise.
I love my job and work in this field for 12 years now.
Go for it especially when it is your passion. 🫶🏼
And I'm here when you wanna talk.
Lots of JWs are USERS of physiotherapy. It literally helps them become or stay functional. Such a meaningful field! Shame on them for attempting to talk you out of it.
Lol i’ve been dealing with the same thing after telling a few people in the hall that i’m moving away for college in the fall. The most annoying part of their discouragement is how hypocritical they are: the same brothers and some sisters telling me that college is dangerous and leads to spiritual weakness are the same ones that have their four-year degrees from university and attended college too. I don’t understand the thought process of thinking that something applies to me but not to them. Anyways, i’m excited to move away in the fall and hope everything goes well for you!
Yes, go to college! Great choice! I never went, being a born in, but my son just finished his freshman year. Breaking the cycle of bad choices is awesome!
Tell them that you will get your higher education degree and you’ll work for Bethel afterwards lol. Of course, you’ll not gonna do that.. but tell them what they want to hear lol.
Don’t listen to the witnesses! They want you to stay with your family and be broke so you can’t leave! I’m 26 now and taking things way more serious. I’m doing summer classes while I work full time. I’m interested in nursing. Please, please don’t cave into their cult pressure... Get your education and stay away from creepy guys!
You will be so thankful you went to school.
Rooting for you!
Back in 1973 , I was offered a full scholarship to college but was pressured by the presiding overseer ( at that time) to pioneer as Armageddon was due in 1975. 🙄Today I’m nearly 70 yrs old and will need to work for the rest of my life just to get by. One good thing since I left the JW’S in 1995 ( with my husband) is that we are both happy and free.
Live your life to the fullest 😊
Don't let them win. Going to college was single-handedly the best thing I ever did for my leaving the JWs. Pursue your goals and tell them to shove it!
Good for you!! Congratulations.
My son will be a senior in HS and we are already scouting universities. He woke up the past year and told his PIMI mother this weekend he’s gonna fade from meetings over the next month.
Thank you for venting, you absolutley need to have a safe space to do so. I could go on and on about this as an ex-bethelite, pioneer, elder, internation construction worker who's turning 50 in July and born/raised JW. My ex-wife dealt with the same thing when going through nursing school from her elders in the congo. She ignored them and dealt with peeps in the congo talking sh\*t about her, calling her a rebel, bad influence etc. Keep in mind she was a regular pioneer as well while going through nursing school. Long story short...guess who went to Brooklyn Bethel as a single sister...she did. We met there single, married and were there two years before we decided to leave. For a brief period of time, we ended up in her old congo full of those old ass patriacal POS's becuase the Circut Overseer asked "us" to move there so I could become the Presiding Overseer. THEY. HATED. ME. HER. & were pissed we were there. I NEVER missed an opportunity to raise the fact that she went to Bethel as a single sister becuase she had a skill Bethel needed.
Please do NOT give in. Whatever skill you're pursuing, don't stop. My parents presured me HARD to go from High School to Bethel. I did. I really wanted to go to college but wasn't able to speak my truth.
Bethel is full of men and women who've attended college. Attorneys, Doctors, Nurses, Marking, VIdeo Production....the double standard is disgusting and mildly ironic at best.
Invest in you. F\*CK those guys. As someone who was deeply in it, I understand your frustration and pain but you've got this. Please reach out ANYTIME to me if you need to be reminded of how bad ass you are and how strong you can be, that applies for anyone reading this.
My current life is beautiful, adventurous, and I'm honestly happy with zero guilt. :-)
Johnny
Going to college was one of the best decisions in my adult life. I can't believe how many doors it opened for me, even though I went much later in life. The sooner you can go, the better. And those people discouraging you from going won't be paying your bills one day.
I ran into a witness ive known for years.
He was typically narc, golden boy of congregation, elder, pioneer, went to serve as need greater.
Got married
Guy always thought he was better than everyone.
Saw him about the town I work in.
Pending law cases, wife split, and living with his wordly family, doing meetings still.
He is trying to go to school now after all these years.
You should absolutely go to college! Don’t let them get to you. Just try to keep a low profile and don’t share with them anything. You do what’s best for you.
Also, that older guy that’s hitting on you is an absolute predator. That’s fucking gross.
They fear their followers learning critical thinking skills and beginning to question The organization and the validity of the Bible the way they see it; as mainly factual accounts in human history.
Between learning new philosophies and ideas, as well as forming bonds and relationships with people that can further open the mind to new concepts and beliefs, it’s one of the few yet powerful methods for waking up from a cult.
The organization teaches its followers to repeatedly lie to themselves into thinking the opposite of reality. The way that they regurgitate phrases such as “the best life ever” and “we’re not a cult” with very weak arguments to back up such claims only serve to reinforce a false sense of reality. It seems to be a common high control group tactic. But hey that’s brainwashing.
NO means NO.
You do not owe them an explanation.
It's your decision, it's your life, they won't pay your Tesco grocery bill.
When you get to college, do your best, learn as much as you can and have a little fun (FUN the word all JWs hate and even the concept is 🤮 to them but is important for a happy life)
They do not like independence. They like to censor.
I did a degree and I have no regrets, it was the best time of my life. I only worked for 15 years and then I got ill and had to retire but in that time I bought my house and I have a decent pension. Not subject to anyone's mindset.
Good luck. Go for it and enjoy.
It happened to me when I told them I was going to college. They congregated against me to discourage my decision. I ended up leaving religion and home. Stay strong and go to college.
Good for you for staying strong in your decision! I really wish I had not been so easily swayed to skip out on art college, even could have taken advantage of some scholarships. Oh well
Bearded (when it was **not cool**), with **higher education**, the bane of hypocritical elder, PIMQ brother here.
**It's a strategy used to socially ensnare you within the organisation.**
In my academic years, not long ago everyone was actually respecting of my beliefs, so I had good experience there even being PIMI JW, but I'm respect imposing person myself, so it can vary from place to place and person to person.
My adviсes:
* (From my experience) Expect that attitude towards you will change in the congregation **\*specially from elders\***, so be prepared. Lost "friends" because of it and yet unable to find a partner within;
* **Build social circle outside**, just in case. In my instance, because of the previous point. It doesn't have to be a big one or of close friends (if you are PIMI) but at least few people who you can keep contact with; (I actually failed here, everyone went their own way LMAO \[it's atypical\], so I'm building new one)
* Whatever your choice is just remember your God on your ways. **Ecclesiastes 11:9-10** ;)
Best regards,
Random bro from the internet.
\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_
Edit:
1) There's **NO** biblical foundation against it and also there are many characters that **HAD** higher education.
2) Yes, the elders **HATE** my guts
Absolutely don’t listen
Go, but also ensure your degree will lead to job opportunity and grant financial independence. Medical field is great for this.
The biggest regret in my life is listening to my parents about not needing further education. I'm a big guy and fast for my size, could've gotten a free ride with a football scholarship.
Go to college!
I give this advice to all young people especially those who are coming out of high school: GO TO SCHOOL. Don't make the mistake some of us made. Don't waste your time and don't listen to these people. I ended up going to Dental school later on and wish I did it sooner.
You're gonna regret not having a career later on. You notice there are no super wealthy witnesses and those who are either did it outside of the organization or are GB or much higher up positions. JW's rank at the very bottom for wealth because they listen to those conmen at Bethel.
Also ask them if College is so bad, then why do they need "Satan's" Lawyers to fight off all these lawsuits? If college education is so bad, then why do they need paralegals and Lawyers? Why do they go to the Dr. if education is not important?
Even Mormons encourage education and wealth. That's something to think about.
Depending on the specific job, the medical field is closer to a trade than most careers that require a degree.
Rev 21:4 says, "he will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away". Since this is about loss of life, I assume the intent is pain from loss, not physical pain as it doesn't mention illness. Official org propaganda also quotes Isiah 35:5,6 about being healed of permanent afflictions, but what about ordinary, passing illnesses? It can only be assumed that there won't be any illness.
This seems to indicate that people may still get sick, still dislocate/break bones, still get diarrhea, etc. Is God going to mend every broken bone, firm up every bad poo, and prevent every headache? If God isn't going to keep houses in repair, make clothes, keep electricity and water flowing, or grow and harvest crops, all trades will be needed. If people are still going to get temporarily sick or injured, why would the list of necessary jobs stop there? Health practitioners could be just as necessary as other trades to speed along the processes of healing.
Where are you from? I have a masters degree and several of my friends also. We never had these problems. Brothers never said anything about either degree.
So proud of you for ignoring or blocking them and sticking to your decision to go to college 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
As someone who experienced immense pressure and was soft-shunned for choosing to go to university, I can guarantee you that your future self will appreciate having a degree.
These people need to stop “meddling with what does not concern them” (2 Thessalonians 3:11-12) and focus on their own life. Or focus on the creepy perv that started pursuing you when you were a minor and still persists. wtf?!
Do not listen to them. Your life is yours only, when you go to bed at night, it's YOU who has to feel no regrets about the choices you're taking.
Go to college, develop your critical thinking skills, study a lot and work hard for your future!!! (But hey, don't forget to do the fun stuff as well, make friends of people your own age with similar interests, go to parties, participate in non curricular activities, make memories).
Also, that guy is a fucking predator. I am 25 myself, and I can't even imagine dating a 20 years old, LET ALONE SOMEONE WHO IS A DECADE YOUNGER. Do not engage, do not even talk to him unless needed, those creeps are the worst. But if you feel like you need to put clear limits and voice them, don't be afraid to do so.
Stay strong on this. These people do not have your best interests in mind. I think you know this, but you don’t deserve to be harassed. Block them all. Are you still going to the meetings? They will try to corner you there. If they try, tell them you have to leave immediately after the meeting, and will get back to them when you have time. You don’t need to give anymore excuses than that. None of their business what you are doing that you have to leave. Lol, and if they corner you in the room, you can always gently remind them that preventing someone from leaving is considered kidnapping and is illegal.
We need more medical workers in the field. Don't let them discourage you, they're not going to pay for your bills later in life. I'm in my late 30s and will be graduating from college this year. Stay strong and keep your mind clear of any negative stress. Good luck!
friendly shocking poor mindless scandalous reply books strong fragile absorbed
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
You go to school and let them stay stuck where they are at. I had a similar situation years ago decided to go to school and most if not all of them are struggling financially. Keep your head up they will get over it…
Good! Go For it. They sent their bethelites to college to become lawyers, why is it that you cannot get an education? Because, they know your eyes will be opened to see reality.
[https://youtu.be/w1MBryu95eo?si=xufblBCuUjKoSRr9](https://youtu.be/w1MBryu95eo?si=xufblBCuUjKoSRr9)
Ahhh I’m excited for you! I finally applied in secret. I’ll be 20 at my first semester but, sigh better late than never. I was always scared of moving out, but I finally have a concrete plan
I remember a young MS showing me scriptures when he heard that I was going to university. He had planned a little lecture to give me about how unwise it was and how the end was about to arrive. I wanted to smack him in the head, but instead I thanked him for his opinion. That was in 1990.
Go.To.College!!!!!! Do not be persuaded not to!!! They tried to stop my daughter - She fought back and is now beyond happy at University studying to be an engineer - You can do it!!!
La mejor felicidad de mi que tendrás en tu vida será ir a la universidad y tener una profesión dejarlo será que tendrás que mendigar. Piensa en el cuerpo gobernante no hacen nada y son multimillonarios mintiendo con sus doctrinas antibiblicas, y lo han hecho por más de cien años. Deja esa esa maldita que mucho daño le ha hecho a millones de personas
Don’t listen to them, I felt trapped at 18 and unable to go to college. I’m 20 now and i’m starting in August and i’m so excited, my only regret is not starting sooner. They will only have control of you if you let them!
What everyone else is telling you!! - don't give up on your plan to go to college. I was one of the many of my JW generation that did not go and I've regretted it my whole life.
Don't listen to them. My mom made me go to college (yeah I know I'm the exception not the rule) and, provided I can find a job that pays enough, it's probably gonna be my ticket outta the org.
As a former JW, to HELL with them. All over the world there is a shortage of professionals in the medical field. We need more professionals in the tech/medical field than we do cultists. More open minds than narrow ones. And if they don't like it, than tough ninnys. Bethels already full of freeloading moochers. Another place that needs to be sold off, but that's another story for another time lol.
How could you do this as we’re in the final part of the final, final part of the last days, right down to the final milliseconds before the GT. 😂
Some are probably upset they don’t have the balls to pursue their own goals
Don't back down. The JWs are getting desperate because so many born-ins like us are walking up and leaving. There are fewer converts coming in from outside, and their recommendations from the past decades to "focus on the ministry" and not to have children in "this system of things" is catching up with them also. They know that many children who go to college will develop critical thinking skills and might wake up also. All of this, of course, is a self-fulfilling prophecy as many remember "the love of the greater number will cool off in the end." (Everone has heard that before, I'm sure...) Of course, that phrase has been repeated and reused every time a large number leaves the JWs after each failed prediction going back for over 130+ years now.
You should 💯 go to college. And definitely NOT "court" some PIMI perv who's way too old for you. Or "court" anyone at all at this age, since JWs only do that for marriage and you're far too young to get married!
Your only mistake was telling them too much about your plans. That's none of their business.
The next time some sister starts running her mouth about being a pioneer after high school instead of going to college, just nod and smile. Don't tell them you're planning on pioneering or anything, just appear...agreeable. While in your mind you're saying to yourself, "Not in a million years, sister...."
Stay off the radar. Keep your head down and your cards close to your chest. Don't give them any ammunition to look at you *too* closely.
The last thing you need is some elder convincing your PIMI mom that college isn't the best idea or something. Ugh. (I hope she'll stand her ground with you on this, but my own mother went from helping me research colleges to ripping up her own tax forms so I couldn't use them to apply for financial aid after the elders got wind of my plans. You really never know what buttons they're going to press or what the outcome is going to be, so it's best if you just keep the members of your congregation in the dark and clueless about your plans as much as possible.)
You're nearly out of the woods. Tread lightly and carefully. And remember that your business is yours alone, not theirs.
I wish you well in your future plans!
Yep, go to college. I pioneered after high school and I have lived to regret it. Finally getting my bachelor's and master's degrees in my 50s. Ask me how easy it is to do that with a family and still needing to work. Hint: it's really hard. Do it now while you don't have a lot of responsibilities!
Ignore them. Block them. Get an education.
I went through the same challenges and more when I decided to get an education.
It won't be easy, but it will be so worth it.
Hey OP, everyone has given you excellent support and advice. I see you are PIMO right now. Right now, If you are unable to leave for various reasons, even when you go to college, do you have an option to join a foreign language Cong such as Chinese, Vietnamese, Japanese etc? I grew up in the Chinese Cong, was part of a Japanese congregation too and because of the cultural expectations and intergenerational immigrant trauma, JWs who go to uni are highly respected in these congregations and parents would compare our high school grades and degrees. We had pharmacists, dentists, architects, nurses and more.
Could you just take up an interest in one of these languages and immediately get into one of these congregations instead? You will hopefully be well respected and left alone.
Effect pygmallion: they expect to lose your faith and according to this phenomena, you will likely going to lose your faith. Funnilly enough, in Europe, going to Uni doesn't carry that much stigma and I know a lot of young brothers and sisters that went to Uni (doing Nursing, Accounting, Bioengineering, teaching qualification, child psychology, etc) and they are doing very well.
https://preview.redd.it/vya1inixgb4d1.png?width=1676&format=png&auto=webp&s=a1273ad958c6da382b1f2a08bf403c7bc3fda5e0
As you can see, even the GB espect you to do additional courses in order to be able to sustend yourself. It doen't say WHERE you can do it. In the end, it is up to you to decide, not them.
As someone who was never baptized and left the org at 13 and DID go to college (university here in the UK) I can tell you that it was so so so worth it.
I met great friends, had great parties, slept with beautiful women, opened my mind to new ideas and experiences and eventually met the woman I'm marrying.
Don't even for a second entertain not going if you feel it's right for you. It's such a formative time it would be a shame to miss out because of peer pressure.
Your last sentence says it all!👏👏👏
Screw those motherfuckers. Go to college, meet all sorts of people, stick to the ones who make you feel good. You have your whole life ahead of you and this people want to take it away from you in exchange for trauma, feelings of incompetence and a creepy husband. They don’t want to see you succeed they want to drag you in the mud with them.
One of the best decisions in my life was going to college. It gives new perspective, it sets you free and of course it gives you the tools you need to be independent, not rely to anyone and be your own master. Don’t ever let miserable people’s advice guide your life, they can only tell you what they know, this miserable pathetic life of theirs.
Anyways, you seem to be determined about this and that’s the best you can do. Keep rocking and I wish you the best for this new chapter of your life. May all your ambitions come true
One of my biggest regrets in life was not finishing college. Do what you need to for you. Dont let other people tell you how to live or what will make you happy. Especially not the ones in the BOrg. I listed to the Elders growing up and I regret it everyday.
Funny enough, my mom received the similar comments when she wanted to go into the medical field from everybody saying it was a waste of time and that the end of so close. Now, My mom is enjoying her life because she decides to go get an education and work hard when she was younger now she is able to breeze through her life because of the fact she has a medical degree.
When I see posts like this on ex jw I'm asking myself - isn't distancing from the JW world a part of intended consequences of pursuing higher education 🤷
Also on a more personal note - where I live higher education wasn't discouraged (my PIMI wife still does not believe that GB discourages it). I was PIMI even long after I finished my education. Now I think it's a shame that higher education hasn't pulled me away from "the truth" (although it was close when I was writing my engineering thesis about evolutionary algorithms)
Its is not the business of any religion to either discourage or promote going to college. I have a Science degree and an Associates in Nursing. That is a personal decision that violates NO Bible principles. I only have one caveat. Stay clear of social Fraternity houses, drug use, or bad influences.
Please!!! Go to College for whatever you want! They are not going to help you pay your bills! They will not help you with your medical bills! All they'll do is direct you to a social services office!! PLEASE, GO TO COLLEGE!!!
Ask that sister if she has a couple hundred $ for your light bill!! Seriously, you do not want to be dependent on a man, or this organization!!!
Firmly tell them it is not up for discussion. You owe no one any explanation on how you want to live your life. Not even your parents. Any questions or statements can be answered with:
“I heard what you have to say. My decision is final and not up for discussion.”
Use that phrase calmly, over and over again. No emotion. Just state it as fact. Even if they get emotional, just state it calmly and walk away. Use it to reply to any text message, too.
For this person that is try to “court” you, make a simple statement:
“You make me feel very uncomfortable. I find you creepy and want no further contact at all. Don’t approach me or contact me in any way. My decision is final and not up for discussion.”
If he tries to reassure you, he is definitely a creep. If he tries to get other people to vouch for him, he’s a dangerous creep.
Restate it again then walk away. If he tries to text you, don’t reply. Simply block his number.
I did try that but he thinks I’m playing hard to get or something, It’s not like I can tell him I’m gay either. Even if I was straight I would never consider him ever with the way he acts
Next meeting if he walks up to you, ask him to follow you. Then walk to an elder with him following and say to the elder:
“Brother So&So, I have told this man several times to leave me alone. He refuses. He makes me feel unsafe. So I’d like to file a complaint. I can not attend meetings where I feel unsafe.”
Then turn to the creep and say:
“If you approach me anywhere, I will file a police report for harassment and request a restraining order.”
Then leave. And you’ll never need attend again.
Let me repeat this…EVERY WOMAN should have a trade or degree that she can support her own self financially. One of the big mistakes I made myself when I was young letting everyone talk me out of doing what I wanted…including at time college. Feel like most of my life has been spent doing what everyone else thinks will make me happy only to be unhappy. Again I say ask them who is going to pay your bills get you food and support you. I guarantee it won’t be any of the ones discouraging you to go to college. Hope I hear in the future you graduated your program and are doing well.
That’s where the audacity is! The nerve to tell you how to get your income, your finances, to do the minimum to get paid so you can give what’s left to the cult and make your self more available for them to use. When they are not the ones in your household. They will pay 0 bills and likely not help you if you fall on hard times and blame you.
Don't let them win on this. One of the consistent largest regrets I've seen on here is people not going to college. Stick with it, you're doing great!
Tell them Bethel is asking for medical people then watch their tune change. Of course you wont go but in 4 years who will remember? Go and enjoy your chosen profession! Blessings from a creeper? Pedo sickos all of them!!! Get away from that weirdo!!
This. I’m so eternally grateful that I went to college for a decent paying career. Even as a single woman in her 20’s I haven’t had difficulty leaving from the financial standpoint. Set yourself up for success in the real world as much as humanly possible
Don’t listen to these morons. I made that mistake and although I make a good living it has been challenging without a degree. Do you and don’t look back.
Yeah me too
This is your crystal clear signal you should definitely go to college.
You should absolutely pursue your goals! Even though I'm a little older than some (21), I've worked hard to go after my goal, which is getting into a great uni in spite of everything. Also, what you say about the creepy older person trying to groom you (because that's what he's trying) from 16 is disturbing as hell... but sadly common. This happened a few times in my hall too... even to my former best friend. It's sick and an attempt to strip away your agency in every respect. You can do this, don't let them get you
Everyone in my congregation finds it “cute” and endearing that he’s pursuing me but it’s creepy asf especially with it lasting for years
No, it's out of order and predatory, and these people have their insular morality completely twisted. I experienced similar pressures, although not as severe as I'm a guy. My best friend was a girl, and when she developed feelings, I was immediately pressured by older people and my peers to begin "courting." When I didn't want that kind of commitment, I was told, "But you made her feel comfortable." Like... yes? I provided a safe space, because she's my friend. Wtf do you expect? Somehow, to them, that meant we had to marry in the future. It's so twisted. Edit for clarity: We were 15 and 16 too... they did this to children. They don't see limitations on innocence when it doesn't serve them.
I just find it weird how they talk about how the world pressures young ones when they’re the ones pressuring and also why were they so bent on getting y’all together 😭
The door to door work is bringing in basically no one. The numbers are primarily being replenish through born-ins. It's no wonder it's so emphasised by the elders and everyone else by extension
That’s creepy the way they’re trying to basically breed people because no one is buying it from outside the “religion”
Funny how so many born-ins are leaving anyways.
It’s a pressure of conformity, to be of one hive mind. Any deviation from the scripted life they have planned for you will sound warning bells the organization has installed into most all the minds of its members and they will alert those who are in charge. However you are in charge of your own thinking and your decisions! I’m older now, and I was baptized in the religion. I now believe NO ONE should allow baptism to be a signal to others that they are in charge of a scripted life without YOUR say as to what you will do and who you will become. I definitely wish I had set boundaries for myself as to what I would share, as well as boundaries for others. I definitely regret baptism, because i wasn’t ready, and because, I didn’t fully understand that is was basically a contract with an organization to control my thinking, my thoughts, and my behavior, leaving death as the only graceful exit from the organization. But I wouldn’t have the wonderful children I have.
When I was TWELVE a brother liked me. He was 19. And he was basically waiting for me to be a little older so we could date and get married. And my mom was so happy about this. There is nothing normal about this (or any) religion.
That’s is so disgusting, I’m so sorry
It’s not cute. Do not let anyone or anything keep you from your goal of higher education. They are not interested in keeping you “safe.” They are interested in keeping you controlled. I caved to the peer pressure, got married to the love-bombing creep, and put my education on hold. I’m divorced, thankfully, but getting back to my education has been a long process. There are many things I would change about my past, but my education is the one thing that I would go back in time for with absolute certainty. Please do not give in. I was so worried about disappointing my PIMI family. I learned far too late that I cannot live my life for others. Go to school. Go after the life you want for yourself. Be amazing.
💯
I went to Fresno State 2014-18 (JW parents allowed that since I was still close to home) then did Grad School at Cal Poly SLO 2020-2023 and that was an even better experience since I was finally free from my parent's influence. But you will not regret it!! You will meet so many wonderful people, learn new ways of thinking and looking at things, and grow as a person. You also will be more prepared to deal with the world than you would if you stayed a JW. You'll have many more opportunities to support yourself.
The elders convinced my cousin to deny his Harvard acceptance to pursue the ministry. He's brainwashed now and just wasted such a great opportunity. Don't allow them to pull you in.
Ouch Years from now, he will curse them out You @$$holes cost me Harvard!
One of my good friends that I grew up with has a doctorate from Harvard and I have a masters degree--not from Harvard. We are doing fine.
As a middle aged woman who passed up on many opportunities that could have put me in a much better financial position today, **FUCK THAT NOISE**. None of these assholes with opinions about *your life* are ever going to pay a single bill *for you*. They are only interested in keeping you down at their level. Like crabs in a bucket, they’ll keep trying to pull you back down. Don’t let them.
This is literally the whole issue: Ask those people offering their unsolicited advice if they're willing to pay all your bills now and in the future. No? Then mind your own business! You are getting a degree in a field of your choosing in order to secure a job that will pay your bills the rest of your life. Period.
They will just tell her that brother weirdo that's a decade older will. OP DO NOT LET THEM TALK YOU OUT OF THIS OPPORTUNITY! I speak for a ton of women that allowed this to happen to us, and we all regret it more than we could possibly explain. I know you feel alone, but you have an entire part of the internet rooting for you. Let us know how we can help.
They're clowns the org always tells elders to discourage people from higher education but have no qualms with taking donations for their oh so amazing cause. I hope everything goes well with your studies and you enjoy college
As someone who went to college late in life, I regretted not putting enough energy when I was 18 but I had a lot going on then, one of them was moving out to have my freedom. Don’t let them try to convince you it’s a bad idea. You will thrive so much more once you in college. I’m also in the medical field as a hospital pharmacy tech and it’s been a major blessing.
i'm SO GLAD you are not caving to this pressure. not only for your education which really matters, but for your life, which matters more. cheering you on!!!
KEEP FIGHTING. 10 years from now, you'll look back and be glad that you ignore their advice and left them in the dust.
As someone who defied the stupid noise against going to college; please don’t fold to the peer pressure from JW’s. The way a cult like JW succeeds is to keep you busy, tired, ignorant, and broke. If you go to college they can’t control you in those ways. However, be smart about your course work, major choices, and affordability of the school you choose. Medical, any engineering, and cybersecurity are great options with higher earnings potential. Ghost these naysayers and focus on the real future blessings a degree 📜 and a world of real opportunities not make believe JW stupidity & fear. Hang in there you got this.
Anything in the trades is in high demand as well. Old timers in the trades are dying off and not being replaced fast enough. Solid income as long as you don't do any work for JWs who think they are entited to a "discount"!!!
No\_Somewhere9185 - you GO FOR IT! You CAN do it! The hypocrisy is crazy. You gotta be poor and barely get by ..... but...... I started to look around me and looking at the elite, powerful, prestigious, families in the congregation, circuit. And wealthy. How did that family of 6 afford to buy a retirement property in another state? Dad is still an elder. He and is wife both worked full-time. But when my hubby and I both worked full-time we were criticized, considered "not good association". How do they afford to BUILD their own homes? Live in it for a while, build another one and sell the previous? Repeatedly. Why aren't they regular pioneering instead and donating the money to the borg? (Yes, I know you can make a lot of money flipping real estate, but we are talking jw's here. And flipping real estate is very time consuming.) How did that elderly couple afford to buy a vacation condo in another state? (NOT a time share.) How did that other elite powerful family manage to accumulate millions, and millions of dollars in rental real estate? Not really nice houses, but what I've heard called "slum-lord rentals". (By the way, the dad was the chairman of the RBC until he had a massive, debilitating stroke.) None of them went to college. How in the world did they get so powerful and rich in this cult? Did the parents, grandparents, great-grand parents have so much money, generational wealth, that keeps growing in perpetuity? Maybe. But...... maybe it was by renting their crappy rentals to poor jws. As jw's, they have an ending supply of needy jws looking for a job and/or a place to rent. Greed. Double standard. Hypocrisy.
1. Go to college, follow your dreams, get away from them. My congregation was cool with education, but I was still discouraged by a dropout MS and some pioneers, elders didn't seem to mind much since most of them had degrees. I've had great experiences, fulfilling jobs and met awesome people, including my husband, thanks to engineering school. I would be stuck in the same circle had I chosen to fulfill my devoted wife's role. 2. Tell the groomer to fuck off. I dated an older guy when I was 18 and he was a nightmare. There's a reason why they can't date women their age.
It takes courage and self-esteem to put up with that pressure. Well done! If it helps, those who criticize your decision can be referred to Awake 1998, March 8, pages 19-21, the second last paragraph, which clearly states that no one should criticize or judge your decision with regards to higher education. Yes I know the Awake is intended for the general public, but you don't have to tell them that. It still counts as "spiritual food".
Read the Nov 1 1992 WT study They had mentioned Daniel and his 3 friends in Babylon schools The second article also said SPECIFICALLY others should not criticize you.
Make sure you have all your ducks in a row. Fill out your FAFSA and talk to the college counselor at your school and the financial aid people at your proposed college. Given the situation, you should be able to prove no parental contribution toward your tuition and expenses. This can help you get more aid. Make sure your parents do not have access to your money by getting a new bank account. I know it feels like everyone is against you right now. The Org made it like this on purpose to make it more difficult to branch out, grow, and try new things. You have resources available to you to help you follow your path. It will be tough, but you can do it.
Don't let them win. You have a really good plan. And the medical field is really interesting and a very important job. I am a Physiotherapist, some people told me it isn't a good plan, because you don't need it in paradise. I love my job and work in this field for 12 years now. Go for it especially when it is your passion. 🫶🏼 And I'm here when you wanna talk.
Thank you sm
🫂
Lots of JWs are USERS of physiotherapy. It literally helps them become or stay functional. Such a meaningful field! Shame on them for attempting to talk you out of it.
Lol i’ve been dealing with the same thing after telling a few people in the hall that i’m moving away for college in the fall. The most annoying part of their discouragement is how hypocritical they are: the same brothers and some sisters telling me that college is dangerous and leads to spiritual weakness are the same ones that have their four-year degrees from university and attended college too. I don’t understand the thought process of thinking that something applies to me but not to them. Anyways, i’m excited to move away in the fall and hope everything goes well for you!
Yes, go to college! Great choice! I never went, being a born in, but my son just finished his freshman year. Breaking the cycle of bad choices is awesome!
Tell them that you will get your higher education degree and you’ll work for Bethel afterwards lol. Of course, you’ll not gonna do that.. but tell them what they want to hear lol.
Don’t listen to the witnesses! They want you to stay with your family and be broke so you can’t leave! I’m 26 now and taking things way more serious. I’m doing summer classes while I work full time. I’m interested in nursing. Please, please don’t cave into their cult pressure... Get your education and stay away from creepy guys! You will be so thankful you went to school. Rooting for you!
Back in 1973 , I was offered a full scholarship to college but was pressured by the presiding overseer ( at that time) to pioneer as Armageddon was due in 1975. 🙄Today I’m nearly 70 yrs old and will need to work for the rest of my life just to get by. One good thing since I left the JW’S in 1995 ( with my husband) is that we are both happy and free. Live your life to the fullest 😊
Don't let them win. Going to college was single-handedly the best thing I ever did for my leaving the JWs. Pursue your goals and tell them to shove it!
Don’t listen to them. They want you to just do a trade so that they can get free labour from you.
Good for you!! Congratulations. My son will be a senior in HS and we are already scouting universities. He woke up the past year and told his PIMI mother this weekend he’s gonna fade from meetings over the next month.
Thank you for venting, you absolutley need to have a safe space to do so. I could go on and on about this as an ex-bethelite, pioneer, elder, internation construction worker who's turning 50 in July and born/raised JW. My ex-wife dealt with the same thing when going through nursing school from her elders in the congo. She ignored them and dealt with peeps in the congo talking sh\*t about her, calling her a rebel, bad influence etc. Keep in mind she was a regular pioneer as well while going through nursing school. Long story short...guess who went to Brooklyn Bethel as a single sister...she did. We met there single, married and were there two years before we decided to leave. For a brief period of time, we ended up in her old congo full of those old ass patriacal POS's becuase the Circut Overseer asked "us" to move there so I could become the Presiding Overseer. THEY. HATED. ME. HER. & were pissed we were there. I NEVER missed an opportunity to raise the fact that she went to Bethel as a single sister becuase she had a skill Bethel needed. Please do NOT give in. Whatever skill you're pursuing, don't stop. My parents presured me HARD to go from High School to Bethel. I did. I really wanted to go to college but wasn't able to speak my truth. Bethel is full of men and women who've attended college. Attorneys, Doctors, Nurses, Marking, VIdeo Production....the double standard is disgusting and mildly ironic at best. Invest in you. F\*CK those guys. As someone who was deeply in it, I understand your frustration and pain but you've got this. Please reach out ANYTIME to me if you need to be reminded of how bad ass you are and how strong you can be, that applies for anyone reading this. My current life is beautiful, adventurous, and I'm honestly happy with zero guilt. :-) Johnny
Going to college was one of the best decisions in my adult life. I can't believe how many doors it opened for me, even though I went much later in life. The sooner you can go, the better. And those people discouraging you from going won't be paying your bills one day.
I ran into a witness ive known for years. He was typically narc, golden boy of congregation, elder, pioneer, went to serve as need greater. Got married Guy always thought he was better than everyone. Saw him about the town I work in. Pending law cases, wife split, and living with his wordly family, doing meetings still. He is trying to go to school now after all these years.
You should absolutely go to college! Don’t let them get to you. Just try to keep a low profile and don’t share with them anything. You do what’s best for you. Also, that older guy that’s hitting on you is an absolute predator. That’s fucking gross.
They fear their followers learning critical thinking skills and beginning to question The organization and the validity of the Bible the way they see it; as mainly factual accounts in human history. Between learning new philosophies and ideas, as well as forming bonds and relationships with people that can further open the mind to new concepts and beliefs, it’s one of the few yet powerful methods for waking up from a cult. The organization teaches its followers to repeatedly lie to themselves into thinking the opposite of reality. The way that they regurgitate phrases such as “the best life ever” and “we’re not a cult” with very weak arguments to back up such claims only serve to reinforce a false sense of reality. It seems to be a common high control group tactic. But hey that’s brainwashing.
https://preview.redd.it/37mfs63aq74d1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a9a30811a2eb2ae440ea4df707f4e4f80f6da1ed
https://preview.redd.it/k2ysuvthq74d1.jpeg?width=612&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f4879f6d5418a2d174df211237bd2e3b11ac2bf5
They're scared of you going because college teaches and encourage critical thinking! Go to college!!!
NO means NO. You do not owe them an explanation. It's your decision, it's your life, they won't pay your Tesco grocery bill. When you get to college, do your best, learn as much as you can and have a little fun (FUN the word all JWs hate and even the concept is 🤮 to them but is important for a happy life) They do not like independence. They like to censor. I did a degree and I have no regrets, it was the best time of my life. I only worked for 15 years and then I got ill and had to retire but in that time I bought my house and I have a decent pension. Not subject to anyone's mindset. Good luck. Go for it and enjoy.
It happened to me when I told them I was going to college. They congregated against me to discourage my decision. I ended up leaving religion and home. Stay strong and go to college.
Good for you for staying strong in your decision! I really wish I had not been so easily swayed to skip out on art college, even could have taken advantage of some scholarships. Oh well
Bearded (when it was **not cool**), with **higher education**, the bane of hypocritical elder, PIMQ brother here. **It's a strategy used to socially ensnare you within the organisation.** In my academic years, not long ago everyone was actually respecting of my beliefs, so I had good experience there even being PIMI JW, but I'm respect imposing person myself, so it can vary from place to place and person to person. My adviсes: * (From my experience) Expect that attitude towards you will change in the congregation **\*specially from elders\***, so be prepared. Lost "friends" because of it and yet unable to find a partner within; * **Build social circle outside**, just in case. In my instance, because of the previous point. It doesn't have to be a big one or of close friends (if you are PIMI) but at least few people who you can keep contact with; (I actually failed here, everyone went their own way LMAO \[it's atypical\], so I'm building new one) * Whatever your choice is just remember your God on your ways. **Ecclesiastes 11:9-10** ;) Best regards, Random bro from the internet. \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ Edit: 1) There's **NO** biblical foundation against it and also there are many characters that **HAD** higher education. 2) Yes, the elders **HATE** my guts
Take it from the Exjw community, ignore them! They do this to all young people because the religion is run by idiots!
You won't regret it. If college pulls you from the cult, that is a good thing. lol
Absolutely don’t listen Go, but also ensure your degree will lead to job opportunity and grant financial independence. Medical field is great for this.
The biggest regret in my life is listening to my parents about not needing further education. I'm a big guy and fast for my size, could've gotten a free ride with a football scholarship. Go to college!
Ugh pisses me off just reading this.. I would tell them to fuck off… a bunch of window washers telling you not to educate yourself, the audacity.
Education is the greatest enemy of the JWs
I give this advice to all young people especially those who are coming out of high school: GO TO SCHOOL. Don't make the mistake some of us made. Don't waste your time and don't listen to these people. I ended up going to Dental school later on and wish I did it sooner. You're gonna regret not having a career later on. You notice there are no super wealthy witnesses and those who are either did it outside of the organization or are GB or much higher up positions. JW's rank at the very bottom for wealth because they listen to those conmen at Bethel. Also ask them if College is so bad, then why do they need "Satan's" Lawyers to fight off all these lawsuits? If college education is so bad, then why do they need paralegals and Lawyers? Why do they go to the Dr. if education is not important? Even Mormons encourage education and wealth. That's something to think about.
Depending on the specific job, the medical field is closer to a trade than most careers that require a degree. Rev 21:4 says, "he will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away". Since this is about loss of life, I assume the intent is pain from loss, not physical pain as it doesn't mention illness. Official org propaganda also quotes Isiah 35:5,6 about being healed of permanent afflictions, but what about ordinary, passing illnesses? It can only be assumed that there won't be any illness. This seems to indicate that people may still get sick, still dislocate/break bones, still get diarrhea, etc. Is God going to mend every broken bone, firm up every bad poo, and prevent every headache? If God isn't going to keep houses in repair, make clothes, keep electricity and water flowing, or grow and harvest crops, all trades will be needed. If people are still going to get temporarily sick or injured, why would the list of necessary jobs stop there? Health practitioners could be just as necessary as other trades to speed along the processes of healing.
I'm so proud of you! I just finished grad school at age 57 because I wasn't as fearless at your age as you are. It's my biggest regret.
Where are you from? I have a masters degree and several of my friends also. We never had these problems. Brothers never said anything about either degree.
Good on you!! I always felt bad for folk who didn’t go to college and went door to door instead.
So proud of you for ignoring or blocking them and sticking to your decision to go to college 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 As someone who experienced immense pressure and was soft-shunned for choosing to go to university, I can guarantee you that your future self will appreciate having a degree. These people need to stop “meddling with what does not concern them” (2 Thessalonians 3:11-12) and focus on their own life. Or focus on the creepy perv that started pursuing you when you were a minor and still persists. wtf?!
Do not listen to them. Your life is yours only, when you go to bed at night, it's YOU who has to feel no regrets about the choices you're taking. Go to college, develop your critical thinking skills, study a lot and work hard for your future!!! (But hey, don't forget to do the fun stuff as well, make friends of people your own age with similar interests, go to parties, participate in non curricular activities, make memories). Also, that guy is a fucking predator. I am 25 myself, and I can't even imagine dating a 20 years old, LET ALONE SOMEONE WHO IS A DECADE YOUNGER. Do not engage, do not even talk to him unless needed, those creeps are the worst. But if you feel like you need to put clear limits and voice them, don't be afraid to do so.
They are scared to death you wont need them
Stay strong on this. These people do not have your best interests in mind. I think you know this, but you don’t deserve to be harassed. Block them all. Are you still going to the meetings? They will try to corner you there. If they try, tell them you have to leave immediately after the meeting, and will get back to them when you have time. You don’t need to give anymore excuses than that. None of their business what you are doing that you have to leave. Lol, and if they corner you in the room, you can always gently remind them that preventing someone from leaving is considered kidnapping and is illegal.
We need more medical workers in the field. Don't let them discourage you, they're not going to pay for your bills later in life. I'm in my late 30s and will be graduating from college this year. Stay strong and keep your mind clear of any negative stress. Good luck!
So glad you have the strength and wisdom to do what is best for you.
friendly shocking poor mindless scandalous reply books strong fragile absorbed *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I feel like they ( religion) slave you. Especially jw.
You go to school and let them stay stuck where they are at. I had a similar situation years ago decided to go to school and most if not all of them are struggling financially. Keep your head up they will get over it…
Good! Go For it. They sent their bethelites to college to become lawyers, why is it that you cannot get an education? Because, they know your eyes will be opened to see reality. [https://youtu.be/w1MBryu95eo?si=xufblBCuUjKoSRr9](https://youtu.be/w1MBryu95eo?si=xufblBCuUjKoSRr9)
Ahhh I’m excited for you! I finally applied in secret. I’ll be 20 at my first semester but, sigh better late than never. I was always scared of moving out, but I finally have a concrete plan
I remember a young MS showing me scriptures when he heard that I was going to university. He had planned a little lecture to give me about how unwise it was and how the end was about to arrive. I wanted to smack him in the head, but instead I thanked him for his opinion. That was in 1990.
I thank not-God there was no instant messaging apps when I started doubting and going away 😮💨
Go.To.College!!!!!! Do not be persuaded not to!!! They tried to stop my daughter - She fought back and is now beyond happy at University studying to be an engineer - You can do it!!!
La mejor felicidad de mi que tendrás en tu vida será ir a la universidad y tener una profesión dejarlo será que tendrás que mendigar. Piensa en el cuerpo gobernante no hacen nada y son multimillonarios mintiendo con sus doctrinas antibiblicas, y lo han hecho por más de cien años. Deja esa esa maldita que mucho daño le ha hecho a millones de personas
Don’t listen to them, I felt trapped at 18 and unable to go to college. I’m 20 now and i’m starting in August and i’m so excited, my only regret is not starting sooner. They will only have control of you if you let them!
What everyone else is telling you!! - don't give up on your plan to go to college. I was one of the many of my JW generation that did not go and I've regretted it my whole life.
Don't listen to them. My mom made me go to college (yeah I know I'm the exception not the rule) and, provided I can find a job that pays enough, it's probably gonna be my ticket outta the org.
As a former JW, to HELL with them. All over the world there is a shortage of professionals in the medical field. We need more professionals in the tech/medical field than we do cultists. More open minds than narrow ones. And if they don't like it, than tough ninnys. Bethels already full of freeloading moochers. Another place that needs to be sold off, but that's another story for another time lol.
“If you think anything you have to offer me is a blessing, you are a wildly deluded pedophile, Brother.”
You're not going into the dark you are seeing the light.
I’m 44 and they did this to me too. Keep moving forward in the direction of your dreams, not theirs.
How could you do this as we’re in the final part of the final, final part of the last days, right down to the final milliseconds before the GT. 😂 Some are probably upset they don’t have the balls to pursue their own goals
Funny how many lawyers & CPAs the organization uses- not just degreed but post graduates! “ rules for thee but not for me”
go to college.
Don't back down. The JWs are getting desperate because so many born-ins like us are walking up and leaving. There are fewer converts coming in from outside, and their recommendations from the past decades to "focus on the ministry" and not to have children in "this system of things" is catching up with them also. They know that many children who go to college will develop critical thinking skills and might wake up also. All of this, of course, is a self-fulfilling prophecy as many remember "the love of the greater number will cool off in the end." (Everone has heard that before, I'm sure...) Of course, that phrase has been repeated and reused every time a large number leaves the JWs after each failed prediction going back for over 130+ years now.
You should 💯 go to college. And definitely NOT "court" some PIMI perv who's way too old for you. Or "court" anyone at all at this age, since JWs only do that for marriage and you're far too young to get married! Your only mistake was telling them too much about your plans. That's none of their business. The next time some sister starts running her mouth about being a pioneer after high school instead of going to college, just nod and smile. Don't tell them you're planning on pioneering or anything, just appear...agreeable. While in your mind you're saying to yourself, "Not in a million years, sister...." Stay off the radar. Keep your head down and your cards close to your chest. Don't give them any ammunition to look at you *too* closely. The last thing you need is some elder convincing your PIMI mom that college isn't the best idea or something. Ugh. (I hope she'll stand her ground with you on this, but my own mother went from helping me research colleges to ripping up her own tax forms so I couldn't use them to apply for financial aid after the elders got wind of my plans. You really never know what buttons they're going to press or what the outcome is going to be, so it's best if you just keep the members of your congregation in the dark and clueless about your plans as much as possible.) You're nearly out of the woods. Tread lightly and carefully. And remember that your business is yours alone, not theirs. I wish you well in your future plans!
Yep, go to college. I pioneered after high school and I have lived to regret it. Finally getting my bachelor's and master's degrees in my 50s. Ask me how easy it is to do that with a family and still needing to work. Hint: it's really hard. Do it now while you don't have a lot of responsibilities!
Ignore them. Block them. Get an education. I went through the same challenges and more when I decided to get an education. It won't be easy, but it will be so worth it.
Hey OP, everyone has given you excellent support and advice. I see you are PIMO right now. Right now, If you are unable to leave for various reasons, even when you go to college, do you have an option to join a foreign language Cong such as Chinese, Vietnamese, Japanese etc? I grew up in the Chinese Cong, was part of a Japanese congregation too and because of the cultural expectations and intergenerational immigrant trauma, JWs who go to uni are highly respected in these congregations and parents would compare our high school grades and degrees. We had pharmacists, dentists, architects, nurses and more. Could you just take up an interest in one of these languages and immediately get into one of these congregations instead? You will hopefully be well respected and left alone.
Effect pygmallion: they expect to lose your faith and according to this phenomena, you will likely going to lose your faith. Funnilly enough, in Europe, going to Uni doesn't carry that much stigma and I know a lot of young brothers and sisters that went to Uni (doing Nursing, Accounting, Bioengineering, teaching qualification, child psychology, etc) and they are doing very well. https://preview.redd.it/vya1inixgb4d1.png?width=1676&format=png&auto=webp&s=a1273ad958c6da382b1f2a08bf403c7bc3fda5e0 As you can see, even the GB espect you to do additional courses in order to be able to sustend yourself. It doen't say WHERE you can do it. In the end, it is up to you to decide, not them.
You cannot go wrong in the medical field. It will **ALWAYS** be needed and it's a skill set you can take with you **ANYWHERE**.
As someone who was never baptized and left the org at 13 and DID go to college (university here in the UK) I can tell you that it was so so so worth it. I met great friends, had great parties, slept with beautiful women, opened my mind to new ideas and experiences and eventually met the woman I'm marrying. Don't even for a second entertain not going if you feel it's right for you. It's such a formative time it would be a shame to miss out because of peer pressure.
Your last sentence says it all!👏👏👏 Screw those motherfuckers. Go to college, meet all sorts of people, stick to the ones who make you feel good. You have your whole life ahead of you and this people want to take it away from you in exchange for trauma, feelings of incompetence and a creepy husband. They don’t want to see you succeed they want to drag you in the mud with them. One of the best decisions in my life was going to college. It gives new perspective, it sets you free and of course it gives you the tools you need to be independent, not rely to anyone and be your own master. Don’t ever let miserable people’s advice guide your life, they can only tell you what they know, this miserable pathetic life of theirs. Anyways, you seem to be determined about this and that’s the best you can do. Keep rocking and I wish you the best for this new chapter of your life. May all your ambitions come true
Become a physician like Luke.
One of my biggest regrets in life was not finishing college. Do what you need to for you. Dont let other people tell you how to live or what will make you happy. Especially not the ones in the BOrg. I listed to the Elders growing up and I regret it everyday.
Funny enough, my mom received the similar comments when she wanted to go into the medical field from everybody saying it was a waste of time and that the end of so close. Now, My mom is enjoying her life because she decides to go get an education and work hard when she was younger now she is able to breeze through her life because of the fact she has a medical degree.
When I see posts like this on ex jw I'm asking myself - isn't distancing from the JW world a part of intended consequences of pursuing higher education 🤷 Also on a more personal note - where I live higher education wasn't discouraged (my PIMI wife still does not believe that GB discourages it). I was PIMI even long after I finished my education. Now I think it's a shame that higher education hasn't pulled me away from "the truth" (although it was close when I was writing my engineering thesis about evolutionary algorithms)
Best thing I did in my life was going to university!
Its is not the business of any religion to either discourage or promote going to college. I have a Science degree and an Associates in Nursing. That is a personal decision that violates NO Bible principles. I only have one caveat. Stay clear of social Fraternity houses, drug use, or bad influences.
I didn’t go to college. I hate myself every day for it. I made sure that all three of my girls got their degrees.
Yeah, same. I didn't go because I moved out to escape the cult. Not having a degree is a nightmare 😫.
Please!!! Go to College for whatever you want! They are not going to help you pay your bills! They will not help you with your medical bills! All they'll do is direct you to a social services office!! PLEASE, GO TO COLLEGE!!! Ask that sister if she has a couple hundred $ for your light bill!! Seriously, you do not want to be dependent on a man, or this organization!!!
Firmly tell them it is not up for discussion. You owe no one any explanation on how you want to live your life. Not even your parents. Any questions or statements can be answered with: “I heard what you have to say. My decision is final and not up for discussion.” Use that phrase calmly, over and over again. No emotion. Just state it as fact. Even if they get emotional, just state it calmly and walk away. Use it to reply to any text message, too. For this person that is try to “court” you, make a simple statement: “You make me feel very uncomfortable. I find you creepy and want no further contact at all. Don’t approach me or contact me in any way. My decision is final and not up for discussion.” If he tries to reassure you, he is definitely a creep. If he tries to get other people to vouch for him, he’s a dangerous creep. Restate it again then walk away. If he tries to text you, don’t reply. Simply block his number.
I did try that but he thinks I’m playing hard to get or something, It’s not like I can tell him I’m gay either. Even if I was straight I would never consider him ever with the way he acts
Next meeting if he walks up to you, ask him to follow you. Then walk to an elder with him following and say to the elder: “Brother So&So, I have told this man several times to leave me alone. He refuses. He makes me feel unsafe. So I’d like to file a complaint. I can not attend meetings where I feel unsafe.” Then turn to the creep and say: “If you approach me anywhere, I will file a police report for harassment and request a restraining order.” Then leave. And you’ll never need attend again. 