My parents are a similar age - 81 & 79.
60 years in the religion.
Pioneering, Elder, tens of thousands pounds donated over the years.
They're never waking up š
It's extremely sad
At age 80 if they wake up on their own good for them otherwise I would just smile and let them believe in whatever fantasies they have while hoping they benefit from whatever the true afterlife is by virtue of them being overall good people.
Probably best to let them believe in the so called truth, 1914 generation, Rev book,told by the org to study 3 times,all food at the proper time, from jehovah and Jesus to the organisation, by the holy spirit, by the way that never lies, and here they are to date, their all dead and long ago, the lie,.I suppose it's all they have,. Leave them in peace,.pointless,
I posted here a few weeks ago about a member of my in laws family whose in her 80 and succumbing to age and dementia. Shes quite vocal about how frustrated she is by not being in paradise already, and often asks says why has Jehovah let things get this bad. Its sad to watch. She never expected to get old and start to suffer with age related health problems etc.
This is exactly what my
Parents are going through.
They were never prepared to live this long. So many promises made by this corrupt society of greedy men.
I took care of an older sister in my first congregation. She ended up a resident at the nursing home I worked at. She told me some true gems. I felt bad for her though. She had a rough deal in life but remained faithful and then lamented in the end. She was sad about how she ended up alone and old without family. The āfriendsā didnāt really show up often. She looked forward to seeing me. But it was no changing her mind she was doing the right thing. She had a touch of dementia too.
Unfortunately this was back in 2016-2017. She was 97 then so itās more likely she has passed. I donāt know because I left that job in 2017 and moved an hour away. Now I live in a completely different state. She was a spunky fun lady. She never had children. So it was sad that her āfamilyā really didnāt look out. This was eye opening for me. I came from a church background. The fact the JWs just didnāt help out the sick, poor or elderly in their own religion was a red flag for me. Iāve seen churches that were āmoney hungryā do more for their own people and the community.
It's terrible,.it's desperate to see a religious organization, shameless, to make false promises, over the years, and the faithfull never received the promises of never growing old,such bullshit, my mother was the same, died of cancer, in pain, faithfully serving, and growing old,.still hurts, all I could say ma we will have a fest, the hole family, with wine,and we will be happy. Fucking piss me off thinking about her suffering,
My parents are almost in their 80s as well. Pioneers, dad is a very long time elder. I think at this point it is too late. So much sunk cost. It would be admitting to a wasted life. I will say that even the good long time elders like my father and yours have no doubt played a part in disfellowshiping minors. This is an evil thing that they should be held accountable for. How I am not sure. Lawsuits seem to be the only language this organization understands.
That's my mom too. For some folks, their fath is a dependency, taking it from them is like cold turkey on severe, life-long alcoholism. Better to let them have some peace of mind than shatter their entire life.
My parents are both in their 80ās
They will Never change. Same congregation for over 50 years.
My mother said on the phone the other day. Even if this isnāt the true religion. We are too old to change.
Even though there is currently a previous elder who is being charged with 7 counts of CSA.
And in discussing this with some involved. There were at least 6 active pedos in our hall when we were growing up.
I wish it hadnāt taken me
This long to wake up.
>i love them dearly but man its hard to stomach when u wake up.
There\`s not much you can do for them, except let them be happy where they are...
That\`s what I do.
Yep, there's not much you can do for someone in their 80s. It hurts to see your parents get old and robbed of their life by the WT. The Avg lifespan in the USA is about 76, so anything over that is a gift.
I would do everything in my power to enjoy your parents while you still have them. And don't take away their hope of living in a Paradise Earth in this stage of their life. It will just devastate them.
My dad never believed but was baptized just to keep peace at home. He was never active. Mom is crazy PIMI. They are 81. Because of illness, mom is housebound. I was so frustrated one day talking to my dad and expressing that I could not understand why mom still believes.
Dad finally said, āShe canāt get out of bed. Her religious beliefs are all she has.ā
Iāve stopped getting upset. Iām just enjoying every moment I have with her. I canāt change her. Sheās my mom and I love her.
I do, however, hate the cult. I hate the elders. I hate the manipulators.
I am grateful for the one sister who keeps visiting my mom and calling her.
My Dad is exactly the same. Iāve come to the conclusion that destroying his world view and removing his source of meaning would be counterproductive. Leave them be. Let them enjoy their last few years in ignorance. Itās not important in the end, but your support of them is.
my parents 82, 80. won't meet their only grandchild because it would make them complicated in my life. now that I'm a father I can't imagine ever treating my son like that. seems more demonic than christan.
My mom is 91 and in poor health. I'm and also in poor health. I remember reading the book " millions now living will never die" as a kid. Went to one of aunt's funeral at the hall last week and ran into friends from the old congregation..broke my heart to see how sickly and aged they/we had become.
What a shameful farce they pulled on these poor people.
My grandma is in her 70ās, I honestly rather her just stay a JW. Theyāve made her so afraid and paranoid of the outside world, I donāt know if or how she would be able to create a new life outside of the religion. At that age I think itās best to just stay a JW, even if they wake up. Their whole life is the religion. Friends, morals, happiness, familiarity, etc. is all tied the religion. It takes time to rebuild all of that, especially at that age. Now if they arenāt happy with the religion, or are mentally suffering because of it, then itās a different story. Otherwise, if they were happy with the way their lives turned out as JWās, then I wouldnāt be sad at all
Iām pretty sure their excuse for false prophecies like 1914 prior to 1919 is that WT hadnāt been chosen yet by God and thus hadnāt yet been in contact with him.
Though, 1975 is a good one, since itās long after 1919 and some living JWs might actually remember it. ā*Stay alive ātil ā75*ā
Another good example is the part of the January 15th, 2017 Watchtower where it says that the Governing Body is neither inspired nor infallible.
Yep gaslighting at its best, their something else, for years they were saying the holy spirit guides the one true organisation, by Jesus and only them are being guided by holy spirit, that can never lie,2024,and it doesn't, as they just said neither inspired nor perfect,, and yet people are to not questioning them even when it makes no sense, just to obey, that insults and sort of reasonable persons intelligence,
For most of these elderly people, being in the organization is like being in palliative care.
If we take away the "morphine", they die with unimaginable pain and suffering.
It's sad to say, but at these ages... letting them believe is an act of love and compassion.
It's really sad but they have wasted their entire life on the cult, waking up for them would be as if the whole world collapsed for them, their whole life was a lie and they won't even have an afterlife, nothing. It all had no purpose, they wasted their entire life and there isn't another chance. I think it's better if they don't wake up and go out happily, thinking they'll be in paradise shortly. Real sad and cruel
My father basically admitted this, and then went fully back into faithful mode.
If my father was a basic country bumpkin like my mother, it'd be easy. But he programmed missles in the airforce, was a lead programmer, computer engineer... i start to think being a JW for him is like his brains cheat day.
My parents are in their mid 70s. Dad is battling cancer, Mom has been sick all her life. They will never wake upā¦. Pops feels guilty about when his cancer holds him back from attending meetings.
Your parents gave their best decades of life to a book printer real estate investment company under the failed promise of serving a greater purpose. I think they know that by now and have known what all of us know by now. It's a fraud. However, it's all they've known and supported it with payment of their life force until it's too late. It's my belief that God will reward them anyway. God is bigger than false religion and evaluates hearts. Christ saved them and all of us. Your parents are good people. That's all that matters doesn't it?
Correct, Jesus didn't say only I died for jehovahs witness, he did it for all mankind, and he said those that believe in me shall get eternal life, if that's for earth or heaven, it doesn't matter one bit, they will be happy anyway,
I think its better to let them live their life and have their faith at this point, and be grateful if they aren't flat broke from giving their time and resources to the borg.
I love my mum a lot. At this point in her life she needs her faith to get her through.
My dad too. He has anxiety, I think heās in the religion to begin with bc he was so anxious about the world. If he woke up and found out he wasted his whole life and made his kids live like that, in addition to finding out thereās no resurrection, I think it would kill him. If it doesnāt kill him, I donāt think he has enough time left to reach a peaceful place before he dies. So let him enjoy his last few years, and die thinking heās about to wake up in paradise with his family (except me..).
Understand. This religion uses members as its life battery to keep the Borg alive. Itās so much to ask from someone for a lie. My grandmother woke up before me at age 86. She had since passed but, Itās possible and any age really.
They're so old now. May as well leave it be. There's nothing to gain from denying them the only existence they've ever known. The damage to their mental health outweighs the benefits of spending the last years of their life in free thought. Unless they actually break out the poisoned kool-aid, live and let live. If they choose to leave on their own, welcome them and soften the landing as best you can. This is very traumatic for everyone.
My Mom is 81yr also, and I'm not going to try waking her up. My 38yr sister I plan to speak to once Mom passes. She has time to have a life of freedom if she wants it.
My parents are 84 and 80. Dad been an elder 45 years. Mom, i think is seeing some issues, but she's not an academic type of person. My father and sister(former Bethelite) are both engineers and computer programmers.
I don't understand how their critical thinking hasn't brought them to understand RELIGIONS are bs explanations of ancient allegorical stories.
The Bible is true, but not in the literal way RELIGION forces it.
Any attempt to point either of them in the right direction is either ignored as 'apostasy', or they get irritated and try diversion tactics.
The frustration of seeing highly analytical people suspend common sense and disbelief to accept teachings that aren't biblical is wild. From men 'chosen' by Holy Spirit, yet still , not inspired.
Seeing my father continually ignore common sense feels so hypocritical, seeing him not consider his 45 years an elder on call as full time service HURTS. My sister is 55 and she wouldn't question anything.
I feel the OP pain. I just want them to see the truth, even if they want to still network with JWs. I faded because I love the friends, and even DF'd people still showed me alot of love.
Seeing your parents expend massive amounts of their remaining time and efforts on a promise continually changed and amended is heart wrenching.
Itās very sad. Itās the same with my parents. I so wish I could make them wake up. But at this point, after believing all of their lives, I think they would probably die from depression, from sadness. They would realize they wasted all of their lives. I think the remorse would be too much for them to handle. So, I will eat my pride, because I want them to be comfortable in the last years of their lives. I will not go as far pretending to believe again, even
tho I know that would make them happy. But I donāt see the point on trying to make them wake up this late in the game of life. I want so bad for them to know I am right, but itās ok. At least I know Iāve tried. You have tried. Just try and have the best relationship you can with them. Thatās my advice
It really is sad. This cult has stolen so many people's lives.
Despite having been shunned for years, when my father passed away at 87 last year, I felt pity and sadness at how he wasted his life, in the JW cult since he was a kid. My mother, who is also elderly, has health issues still follows the cult doctrines. I see more of my younger relatives, all JW, and moving through middle age, still drinking the Kool-aid. A lot of my anger towards their shunning and mistreatment has shifted towards sadness and pity.
I feel for you. Both my parents passed away still clinging to it. Dad went for memorial and helped out where he could. But they both died still holding on to the empty promises made by people who keep the delusions alive. We can only try to be better. Glad your eyes have been opened. š¤š¼šš¤š¼
The role of elder isn't good. And the way they have to preside over everyone isn't good.
But there are good, kind men who are elders.
And yes There are also those who are absolute spanners..
There are. I know a few. They still speak to me. Theyāre like brothers.
I am always grateful for the elder who gave me the nudge, and held the door open so I could walk away and live my life freely.
My parents are a similar age - 81 & 79. 60 years in the religion. Pioneering, Elder, tens of thousands pounds donated over the years. They're never waking up š It's extremely sad
Same here. It hurts. But at this point,there really is no point š
At age 80 if they wake up on their own good for them otherwise I would just smile and let them believe in whatever fantasies they have while hoping they benefit from whatever the true afterlife is by virtue of them being overall good people.
Probably best to let them believe in the so called truth, 1914 generation, Rev book,told by the org to study 3 times,all food at the proper time, from jehovah and Jesus to the organisation, by the holy spirit, by the way that never lies, and here they are to date, their all dead and long ago, the lie,.I suppose it's all they have,. Leave them in peace,.pointless,
I feel the same way
I posted here a few weeks ago about a member of my in laws family whose in her 80 and succumbing to age and dementia. Shes quite vocal about how frustrated she is by not being in paradise already, and often asks says why has Jehovah let things get this bad. Its sad to watch. She never expected to get old and start to suffer with age related health problems etc.
This is exactly what my Parents are going through. They were never prepared to live this long. So many promises made by this corrupt society of greedy men.
I took care of an older sister in my first congregation. She ended up a resident at the nursing home I worked at. She told me some true gems. I felt bad for her though. She had a rough deal in life but remained faithful and then lamented in the end. She was sad about how she ended up alone and old without family. The āfriendsā didnāt really show up often. She looked forward to seeing me. But it was no changing her mind she was doing the right thing. She had a touch of dementia too.
Be good to her,.it's so sad, and cruel to make false promises about never growing old,and letting them grow old and die š¢ š
Unfortunately this was back in 2016-2017. She was 97 then so itās more likely she has passed. I donāt know because I left that job in 2017 and moved an hour away. Now I live in a completely different state. She was a spunky fun lady. She never had children. So it was sad that her āfamilyā really didnāt look out. This was eye opening for me. I came from a church background. The fact the JWs just didnāt help out the sick, poor or elderly in their own religion was a red flag for me. Iāve seen churches that were āmoney hungryā do more for their own people and the community.
My mom is the same..she lets it be known she did not want to grow old
It's terrible,.it's desperate to see a religious organization, shameless, to make false promises, over the years, and the faithfull never received the promises of never growing old,such bullshit, my mother was the same, died of cancer, in pain, faithfully serving, and growing old,.still hurts, all I could say ma we will have a fest, the hole family, with wine,and we will be happy. Fucking piss me off thinking about her suffering,
mom is 85. she'd be lost without it. its her entire life. i wouldn't even begin to consider taking it away from her.
It's her life.and don't, it gives them hope, in their last years, leave them alone, just be their for them,and love them
My parents are almost in their 80s as well. Pioneers, dad is a very long time elder. I think at this point it is too late. So much sunk cost. It would be admitting to a wasted life. I will say that even the good long time elders like my father and yours have no doubt played a part in disfellowshiping minors. This is an evil thing that they should be held accountable for. How I am not sure. Lawsuits seem to be the only language this organization understands.
I woke up 8 years ago, I knew my mother needed to believe what's she believed in for her own mental health. It is sad.
That's my mom too. For some folks, their fath is a dependency, taking it from them is like cold turkey on severe, life-long alcoholism. Better to let them have some peace of mind than shatter their entire life.
It's just as deadly and life ruining as alcoholism too, not really peaceful fr
My parents are both in their 80ās They will Never change. Same congregation for over 50 years. My mother said on the phone the other day. Even if this isnāt the true religion. We are too old to change. Even though there is currently a previous elder who is being charged with 7 counts of CSA. And in discussing this with some involved. There were at least 6 active pedos in our hall when we were growing up. I wish it hadnāt taken me This long to wake up.
>i love them dearly but man its hard to stomach when u wake up. There\`s not much you can do for them, except let them be happy where they are... That\`s what I do.
Yep, there's not much you can do for someone in their 80s. It hurts to see your parents get old and robbed of their life by the WT. The Avg lifespan in the USA is about 76, so anything over that is a gift. I would do everything in my power to enjoy your parents while you still have them. And don't take away their hope of living in a Paradise Earth in this stage of their life. It will just devastate them.
Very true, it gives them comfort in old age,leave them with their Faith, that's all we on our dieing day,don't judge them,
You definitely do want to take from someone something that is precious to them
I think you mean you DON'T want to take it away? My best wishes šĀ
That is what I meant. Stupid auto correct
šĀ
My dad never believed but was baptized just to keep peace at home. He was never active. Mom is crazy PIMI. They are 81. Because of illness, mom is housebound. I was so frustrated one day talking to my dad and expressing that I could not understand why mom still believes. Dad finally said, āShe canāt get out of bed. Her religious beliefs are all she has.ā Iāve stopped getting upset. Iām just enjoying every moment I have with her. I canāt change her. Sheās my mom and I love her. I do, however, hate the cult. I hate the elders. I hate the manipulators. I am grateful for the one sister who keeps visiting my mom and calling her.
My Dad is exactly the same. Iāve come to the conclusion that destroying his world view and removing his source of meaning would be counterproductive. Leave them be. Let them enjoy their last few years in ignorance. Itās not important in the end, but your support of them is.
my parents 82, 80. won't meet their only grandchild because it would make them complicated in my life. now that I'm a father I can't imagine ever treating my son like that. seems more demonic than christan.
Shunning is, like a life sentence, it's cruel, and unnecessary, just to make a point, sad
My mom is 91 and in poor health. I'm and also in poor health. I remember reading the book " millions now living will never die" as a kid. Went to one of aunt's funeral at the hall last week and ran into friends from the old congregation..broke my heart to see how sickly and aged they/we had become. What a shameful farce they pulled on these poor people.
Shoot. I been POMO for 20 years, but when Iām 80ās and 90ās you BETTER BELIEVE ima be pissed about Armageddon hasnāt come yet š
This story is the same for us all, SO SO SAD š
My grandma is in her 70ās, I honestly rather her just stay a JW. Theyāve made her so afraid and paranoid of the outside world, I donāt know if or how she would be able to create a new life outside of the religion. At that age I think itās best to just stay a JW, even if they wake up. Their whole life is the religion. Friends, morals, happiness, familiarity, etc. is all tied the religion. It takes time to rebuild all of that, especially at that age. Now if they arenāt happy with the religion, or are mentally suffering because of it, then itās a different story. Otherwise, if they were happy with the way their lives turned out as JWās, then I wouldnāt be sad at all
Iām pretty sure their excuse for false prophecies like 1914 prior to 1919 is that WT hadnāt been chosen yet by God and thus hadnāt yet been in contact with him. Though, 1975 is a good one, since itās long after 1919 and some living JWs might actually remember it. ā*Stay alive ātil ā75*ā Another good example is the part of the January 15th, 2017 Watchtower where it says that the Governing Body is neither inspired nor infallible.
Yep gaslighting at its best, their something else, for years they were saying the holy spirit guides the one true organisation, by Jesus and only them are being guided by holy spirit, that can never lie,2024,and it doesn't, as they just said neither inspired nor perfect,, and yet people are to not questioning them even when it makes no sense, just to obey, that insults and sort of reasonable persons intelligence,
For most of these elderly people, being in the organization is like being in palliative care. If we take away the "morphine", they die with unimaginable pain and suffering. It's sad to say, but at these ages... letting them believe is an act of love and compassion.
I like that analogy
It's really sad but they have wasted their entire life on the cult, waking up for them would be as if the whole world collapsed for them, their whole life was a lie and they won't even have an afterlife, nothing. It all had no purpose, they wasted their entire life and there isn't another chance. I think it's better if they don't wake up and go out happily, thinking they'll be in paradise shortly. Real sad and cruel
My father basically admitted this, and then went fully back into faithful mode. If my father was a basic country bumpkin like my mother, it'd be easy. But he programmed missles in the airforce, was a lead programmer, computer engineer... i start to think being a JW for him is like his brains cheat day.
My parents are in their mid 70s. Dad is battling cancer, Mom has been sick all her life. They will never wake upā¦. Pops feels guilty about when his cancer holds him back from attending meetings.
Your parents gave their best decades of life to a book printer real estate investment company under the failed promise of serving a greater purpose. I think they know that by now and have known what all of us know by now. It's a fraud. However, it's all they've known and supported it with payment of their life force until it's too late. It's my belief that God will reward them anyway. God is bigger than false religion and evaluates hearts. Christ saved them and all of us. Your parents are good people. That's all that matters doesn't it?
Correct, Jesus didn't say only I died for jehovahs witness, he did it for all mankind, and he said those that believe in me shall get eternal life, if that's for earth or heaven, it doesn't matter one bit, they will be happy anyway,
If you can repent after the "great tribulation" has started, why not live your life and repent after there is tangible proof?
I think its better to let them live their life and have their faith at this point, and be grateful if they aren't flat broke from giving their time and resources to the borg. I love my mum a lot. At this point in her life she needs her faith to get her through.
My dad too. He has anxiety, I think heās in the religion to begin with bc he was so anxious about the world. If he woke up and found out he wasted his whole life and made his kids live like that, in addition to finding out thereās no resurrection, I think it would kill him. If it doesnāt kill him, I donāt think he has enough time left to reach a peaceful place before he dies. So let him enjoy his last few years, and die thinking heās about to wake up in paradise with his family (except me..).
Don't ruin their lives. Knowing the truth has set you free, but for them it's like waking them out of the matrix... but they're 80.
I feel EXACTLY the same way about my parents.
Understand. This religion uses members as its life battery to keep the Borg alive. Itās so much to ask from someone for a lie. My grandmother woke up before me at age 86. She had since passed but, Itās possible and any age really.
They're so old now. May as well leave it be. There's nothing to gain from denying them the only existence they've ever known. The damage to their mental health outweighs the benefits of spending the last years of their life in free thought. Unless they actually break out the poisoned kool-aid, live and let live. If they choose to leave on their own, welcome them and soften the landing as best you can. This is very traumatic for everyone.
My Mom is 81yr also, and I'm not going to try waking her up. My 38yr sister I plan to speak to once Mom passes. She has time to have a life of freedom if she wants it.
I know how you feel. Although I have serious questions about the JW, I still do have hope in an Almighty God.
My parents are 84 and 80. Dad been an elder 45 years. Mom, i think is seeing some issues, but she's not an academic type of person. My father and sister(former Bethelite) are both engineers and computer programmers. I don't understand how their critical thinking hasn't brought them to understand RELIGIONS are bs explanations of ancient allegorical stories. The Bible is true, but not in the literal way RELIGION forces it. Any attempt to point either of them in the right direction is either ignored as 'apostasy', or they get irritated and try diversion tactics. The frustration of seeing highly analytical people suspend common sense and disbelief to accept teachings that aren't biblical is wild. From men 'chosen' by Holy Spirit, yet still , not inspired. Seeing my father continually ignore common sense feels so hypocritical, seeing him not consider his 45 years an elder on call as full time service HURTS. My sister is 55 and she wouldn't question anything. I feel the OP pain. I just want them to see the truth, even if they want to still network with JWs. I faded because I love the friends, and even DF'd people still showed me alot of love. Seeing your parents expend massive amounts of their remaining time and efforts on a promise continually changed and amended is heart wrenching.
Itās very sad. Itās the same with my parents. I so wish I could make them wake up. But at this point, after believing all of their lives, I think they would probably die from depression, from sadness. They would realize they wasted all of their lives. I think the remorse would be too much for them to handle. So, I will eat my pride, because I want them to be comfortable in the last years of their lives. I will not go as far pretending to believe again, even tho I know that would make them happy. But I donāt see the point on trying to make them wake up this late in the game of life. I want so bad for them to know I am right, but itās ok. At least I know Iāve tried. You have tried. Just try and have the best relationship you can with them. Thatās my advice
It really is sad. This cult has stolen so many people's lives. Despite having been shunned for years, when my father passed away at 87 last year, I felt pity and sadness at how he wasted his life, in the JW cult since he was a kid. My mother, who is also elderly, has health issues still follows the cult doctrines. I see more of my younger relatives, all JW, and moving through middle age, still drinking the Kool-aid. A lot of my anger towards their shunning and mistreatment has shifted towards sadness and pity.
I feel the SAME EXACT way about my parents, 72 and 69, itās so sad but I just truly think thereās no hope.
I feel for you. Both my parents passed away still clinging to it. Dad went for memorial and helped out where he could. But they both died still holding on to the empty promises made by people who keep the delusions alive. We can only try to be better. Glad your eyes have been opened. š¤š¼šš¤š¼
There are no āgoodā elders. Not one - anywhere.
The role of elder isn't good. And the way they have to preside over everyone isn't good. But there are good, kind men who are elders. And yes There are also those who are absolute spanners..
There are. I know a few. They still speak to me. Theyāre like brothers. I am always grateful for the elder who gave me the nudge, and held the door open so I could walk away and live my life freely.