"Fry, as you know, there are lots of things I'm willing to *kill* for: jewels, vengeance, Father O'Malley's weed whacker. But at long last, I've found something I'm willing to *die* for: this mindless turtle."
This is probably the easiest selection of this entire series. Which is amazing, because this episode also has lines like "I apologize for nothing", "I have ridden the mighty moon worm!", and "**Once and for all**"
I wish my daily life provided me with more opportunities to appropriately quote this line. I mean, I still quote it all the time. It just generally doesn't make sense when I do
You know now that they brought it up, I do remember seeing that spelling from when I was a kid, but I'll admit I've been spelling it "bologna" for the past two decades lol. I guess somewhere along the way, I associated it with bologna being like "fake" processed meat. That doesn't really sense now that I think about it tho
Yes, there's no safer occupation than mining. Especially when you're perched on a snowball whipping through space at a million miles an hour.
Whoo! whoo! Whoo!
…safe!
"Look, I love life and its pleasures as much as anyone here. Except perhaps you, Hedonismbot. But we need to be shut off! Especially you, Hedonismbot!"
"I apologise for nothing!"
Narrator: Of course, since the greenhouse gases are still building up, it takes more and more ice each time. Thus solving the problem once and for all.
Suzie: But--
Narrator: Once and for all! THE END!
“They called me crazy for building this arc”
“You are crazy, you filled it with same sex animal couples”
“Hey, there are some parts of the Bible I like and parts I don’t like”
Pretty sure the look of the wizard is reference to Tim for Holy Grail but the Gates of Girash (per the subtitles) I think is just a fun wizardy sounding thing
Again, an episode with like a dozen great lines, but how does this not have more votes? I can't see Al Gore, or anyone talking about global warming without saying this.
Holy crap, I know this episode has lots of bangers, but how has nobody (myself included) mentioned:
“You're both alcoholic, whore-mongering, chain-smoking gamblers?”
“Ever since 2063 we simply drop a giant ice cube into the ocean every now and then.
Just like Daddy puts in his drink every morning. And then he gets mad.”
Bender: We pollute too much. We're destroying the world and killing the turtles.
Preacherbot: To hell with the turtles!
Bender: No one insults the turtles!
For saving Earth and foiling me, I proudly yet angrily present you with our new highest honor: the Polluting Medal of Pollution.
Thank you, I deserve it.
"Strange. Why would Nixon, an awkward, uncomfortable man, suddenly throw a party, one of the most social events imaginable? Is a trap, is why! They're going to deactivate all the robots!"
"I don't hear any gasping."
"We all figured that out."
"Aw"
Sorry but I disagree with Jurassic bark quote. A quote does not always need to be funny/stupid to be the best. The real winner is the one line Fry says at the end of the episode before every god damn human on this planet who has seen this episode starts to cry. I’m crying now just thinking about it
I get it but also this is just a fun Reddit thing that makes people reminisce on a show chock full of gems. No quote I’ve ever chosen has won but it’s a blast anyway.
I really don’t care for the one that won “Bender Must Not Be On Television” but that’s the internet for you.
Not a quote, but the sign “Welcome to Kyoto: the Anagram Lover’s Tokyo.”
Oh, that's good!
That sign has lived rent free in my head forever
"I apologize for nothing!"
"Look, I love life and its pleasures as much as anyone here except perhaps you, Hedonismbot. But we need to be shut off! Especially you, Hedonismbot."
“I apologize for nothing”
Another line I say on, minimum, a weekly basis
This is a tattoo that I plan to get.
Any other quote is unacceptable
Professor: I demand the floor! Al Gore's head: Yes, it is your turn to speak. Professor: Well, nuts to me! I'm taking the stage!
Professor, don't do it!
Don't do what? Use this memory ray to remember what happened?
"Fry, as you know, there are lots of things I'm willing to *kill* for: jewels, vengeance, Father O'Malley's weed whacker. But at long last, I've found something I'm willing to *die* for: this mindless turtle."
No one insults the turtles😠
Morbo wishes these stalwart nomads peace amongst the dutch tulips.
I'm sure those windmills will keep them cool
WINDMILLS DO NOT WORK THAT WAY! Goodnight!
Came here for Father O'Malley's weed whacker.
Left with a murder charge... and Father O'Malley's weedwacker
That is one of my top 10 from the series!
WINDMILLS DO NOT WORK THAT WAY. GOODNIGHT.
My favorite Morbo line of the entire series
Second only to “Kittens give Morbo gas”
Don’t forget “Belligerent and numerous.”
Good man! Nixon's pro war and pro family
“Water is now..booze and everyone is titty much protally fit-shaced.”
How can it be anything other than this?
I say this about once a month.
Because we’ve already picked a best. ONCE AND FOR ALL!
It's so fucking hard to choose. This episode had so many banger one-liners
This is probably the easiest selection of this entire series. Which is amazing, because this episode also has lines like "I apologize for nothing", "I have ridden the mighty moon worm!", and "**Once and for all**" I wish my daily life provided me with more opportunities to appropriately quote this line. I mean, I still quote it all the time. It just generally doesn't make sense when I do
Your lack of exclamation points displeases me greatly
I've got a degree in homeopathic medicine! You've got a degree in baloney!
Loooove this one!
I love that it’s from Evergreen state, which is Groening’s alma mater.
Is that how people think bologna is spelled?
Bologna is the lunch meat. Baloney is when something is nonsense. https://www.dictionary.com/browse/baloney
Who else is going to for now on act like they knew that the whole time? Just me?
It's Baloney because it's not real Bologna ;) ^(I made that up, I have no idea what I'm talking about)
So your explanation is … baloney.
If it's not from northern Italy, it's just sparkling ham.
Yo
You know now that they brought it up, I do remember seeing that spelling from when I was a kid, but I'll admit I've been spelling it "bologna" for the past two decades lol. I guess somewhere along the way, I associated it with bologna being like "fake" processed meat. That doesn't really sense now that I think about it tho
Whoa I did not know this!
Spelling it "baloney" makes sense, it's consistent with lasoney!
I think you mean burglelarsonarsoney
Thundercougarfalconbird
Nothing makes you feel more like a man than committing burglarsonarsenry in your Thundercougarfalconbird.
I could be wrong, but I believe it is spelled this way in the closed captions.
I swore it was. Source: trust me bro
that was some really passive-aggressive r/confidentlyincorrect lol happy cake day tho
I'm sweating like J. Edgar Hoover trying to squeeze into a new girdle.
I use this line with disturbing regularity
Thus solving the problem once and for all! But… ONCE AND FOR ALL
Gwobu wubba?
Uhhh yeah?
Just like daddy puts in his dwink every morning.
..then he gets mad 😞
ONCE AND FOR ALL!!!!
A billion robot lives are about to be extinguished! Oh, the Jedi are gonna feel THIS one!!!
unfortunately, he uses the incorrect plural “Jedis” 🤓😤
Nixon's not bringing the smokes!
One of the most underrated deliveries of a gag
Ever since 2063, we simply drop a giant ice cube into the ocean now and again. Just like daddy puts in his drink every morning! Then he gets mad...
Love it, but there should be an exclamation point after "morning" and "mad" should be followed by an ellipsis.
Done, thanks
ONCE AND FOR ALL!
Sure, blame the wizards.
Sapphires? *Dark laugh*
With those I could open the Gates of Garash!
Yes, there's no safer occupation than mining. Especially when you're perched on a snowball whipping through space at a million miles an hour. Whoo! whoo! Whoo! …safe!
I had to scroll way too far to find this one
Morbo is pleased but sticky.
I have ridden the mighty Moon Worm!
Good for him.
Sapphires?! With those I could open the Gate of Garash!
Sure, blame the wizards…..
"Look, I love life and its pleasures as much as anyone here. Except perhaps you, Hedonismbot. But we need to be shut off! Especially you, Hedonismbot!" "I apologise for nothing!"
Professor Hubert Farnsworth: "A billion robot lives are about to be extinguished. Oh, the Jedis are going to feel this one."
Narrator: Of course, since the greenhouse gases are still building up, it takes more and more ice each time. Thus solving the problem once and for all. Suzie: But-- Narrator: Once and for all! THE END!
“They called me crazy for building this arc” “You are crazy, you filled it with same sex animal couples” “Hey, there are some parts of the Bible I like and parts I don’t like”
You been hangin' out with RANDY?!?!
i don't want you talking to randy.
“Oh your a robot” “Don’t stop”
ew!
I laugh hard every time when I see this part.
"Sapphires? With those I could open the Gate of Kerash!"
Sure, blame the wizards.
Garash. It's a Monty Python reference
Really? What's the reference?
Pretty sure the look of the wizard is reference to Tim for Holy Grail but the Gates of Girash (per the subtitles) I think is just a fun wizardy sounding thing
I'm going out to get smokes... really good smokes
2 hours
NIXON'S NOT BRINGING THE SMOKES!!!!
My hip hurts! I'm in the middle of cooking a turkey! I have warranty cards to fill out! I am not just making excuses! Oh! Alright, I'll go!
Some lazy or polite robot is holding it in!
We're destroying the world and killing the turtles!
To hell with the turtles!
“*Nobody* insults the turtles!”
I can’t believe no one is saying “Oh that’s a little bright” this is one of my favorite jokes https://youtu.be/S3EXUZVuH7Y?si=aXV3_A5qyOpEls1E
It's more of a sight gag than a quote, but that was the hardest I laughed during that episode.
Pretty soon, Earth is chock-Full of sunbeams... Their rotting corpses heating our atmosphere.
“Thus solving the problem once and for all.” “But what abo-“ “*ONCE AND FOR ALL!*”
Gwoba Wabbu?
Gwobuw Wabuh?
Again, an episode with like a dozen great lines, but how does this not have more votes? I can't see Al Gore, or anyone talking about global warming without saying this.
"NIXON'S NOT BRINGING THE SMOKES!"
But I was tired... and in love.
[Tearing open a packet of pool water] "Hi-yah!"
Holy crap, I know this episode has lots of bangers, but how has nobody (myself included) mentioned: “You're both alcoholic, whore-mongering, chain-smoking gamblers?”
...thus, solving the problem once and for all. But... Once and for all!
“Ever since 2063 we simply drop a giant ice cube into the ocean every now and then. Just like Daddy puts in his drink every morning. And then he gets mad.”
Or, NONE LIKE IT HOT!
“Just like daddy drops in his drink! And then he gets mad”
This could mean the end of the banana daiquiri as we know it! Also, life.
Just like Daddy puts in his drink every morning! then he gets mad..
This may be the best still frame from Futurama We need a still frame contest next
Bender: We pollute too much. We're destroying the world and killing the turtles. Preacherbot: To hell with the turtles! Bender: No one insults the turtles!
For saving Earth and foiling me, I proudly yet angrily present you with our new highest honor: the Polluting Medal of Pollution. Thank you, I deserve it.
(This scene lives rent free in my head at the top floor. Favorite of all time)
"Strange. Why would Nixon, an awkward, uncomfortable man, suddenly throw a party, one of the most social events imaginable? Is a trap, is why! They're going to deactivate all the robots!" "I don't hear any gasping." "We all figured that out." "Aw"
"thus solving the problem once and for all." "But-" "ONCE AND FOR ALL!"
Time to fulfill my destiny!!! *epic fart* Man, this episode is full of banger quotes.
NIXON'S NOT BRINGING THE SMOKES!
Nixon's not bringing the smokes!!!
Bender, a turtle isn't yourself. Why do you care about it?
“I have a degree in homeopathic medicine!” “You’ve got a degree in baloney.” *hoses away with water*
Fry: "It's so hot, I poured McDonald's coffee in my lap to cool off." Liebeck v. McDonald's reference
I have ridden the mighty moon worm!
Good for you.
Morbo: "WINDMILLS DO NOT WORK THAT WAY! GOOD NIGHT!"
Just like daddy puts in his drink... and then he gets mad.
NIXON’S NOT COMING BACK WITH THE SMOKES!!
"A-ha! I'm even greater than I thought I was. And now to fulfill my destiny!"
Nixon is not bringing the smokes. :(
Hehehe. Oh wait, chlorine….
Global Warming, or NONE LIKE IT HOT!
2 hours
“Thus solving the problem once and for all” “But-“ “ONCE AND FOR ALL”
“Aha! I'm even greater than I thought I was! And now to fulfill my destiny.”
“You’ve got a degree in baloney!!”
It wasn't foreigners, it was global warming.
You haven't acted this suspicious since I found those "ape bones" in the basement.
TO HELL WITH THE TURTLE!!
Time to fulfill my destiny!
AH HA I'm even greater than i thought i was, now to fulfill my destiny
Nobody bad mouths the turtles.
It takes more and more ice each time, thus solving the problem once and for all. but. ONCE AND FOR ALL"
Solving the problem ones and for all. But- ONCE AND FOR ALL
***"WINDMILLS DO NOT WORK THAT WAY! GOODNIGHT!"***
…two hours!
To hell with the turtles!
"No one disrespects the turtle!"
Nixions not bringing the smokes
"I request a Satanic funeral!" BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
What? Removes cassette and reinsert cassette What?
Sorry but I disagree with Jurassic bark quote. A quote does not always need to be funny/stupid to be the best. The real winner is the one line Fry says at the end of the episode before every god damn human on this planet who has seen this episode starts to cry. I’m crying now just thinking about it
I get it but also this is just a fun Reddit thing that makes people reminisce on a show chock full of gems. No quote I’ve ever chosen has won but it’s a blast anyway. I really don’t care for the one that won “Bender Must Not Be On Television” but that’s the internet for you.