I prefer the one that goes
The devil whispered "you're not strong enough to weather the storm" and I replied "get fucked nerd, you lost a fiddling contest to some hillbilly in the boondocks"
And then he said I apologise, please spare me as it was a minor error on my part sire! I could not identify you from afar since you were without the usual 2 sets of truck nuts in your mouth; it was only when I came about 18 yards closer that the waft of your smegma and the sound of heavy moufbreathing struck me as familiar.
Probably a pog always took pictures during rifle range week and ran from colors. Or they were a dirt bag with no actual self identity when they EAS'd so then they just cling to stupid shit like this to help with their confidence issues.
Source: pog and hated fuckers like this.
My friend joined the USMC about two years back. He's admin, and he has this exact same sticker on his 2012 camaro. He's a walking stereotype. Can't handle his alcohol, always getting into fistfights with people for no reason, etc.
I'm counting the days till he marries a stripper.
So many opportunities to make this funny, and they just stuck with cringe.
Personally, I think "Today I whispered in the devil's ear, 'I am Groot' " would be hysterical.
The devil whispered in my ear "you are not strong enough to withstand the storm"
Today I whispered to the devil "One cheeseburger with fries and *extra* large coke"
I knew a guy in my last army reserve unit whod done all sorts of extra combat training, which I guess is cool, except we were a public affairs unit and he'd been an army broadcast journalist his entire time in.
Why is it "today"? It makes it really stilts the quote.
Also, as cringe as this is, let's be careful we aren't catching too much of people's plates, lol
Not that he exists, but going by the Bible it seems like all the devil wanted us to think for ourselves rather than being dictated to by a habitual destroyer of men, women and children who supposedly “loves” us. What did the devil even do that was so bad except to rightfully rebel against his insane father (if you believe in that sub-narrative)?
I used to know a guy like this. He drove a RAM truck too. He was actually in the military. Somehow. I was always nice to him because I felt bad for him and he was actually a pretty nice dude.
One of the funniest things I've ever seen in my life involved him. I was at a party outside on a deck with about a dozen people on the lawn and deck. It was night time.
The dude pulls up in his new RAM (probably 30+% interest if I had to guess, iykyk) and gets out with all his usual swagger. He thinks REALLY highly of himself and he'll gladly let you know. He starts loudly talking about how bad ass and cool he was until everyone outside was looking at him and he was the only one talking. He strolls past a group of girls and comes to talk to me and a couple of my friends. Just after he walks past the girls he jumps and grabs the railing of the deck and swings his legs over. Right into a charcoal grill on the other side of the railing. The grill goes down. He goes down. Charcoal is everywhere. He landed HARD on top of the grill. He was hurt. EVERYONE busted out laughing harder than I've ever heard a group of people laugh. Ever. We helped him up. He probably felt awkward.
Are they in bed together making whispery pillow talk? In a lovers embrace?
How is all this sexually charged whispering in ears happening?
Honestly when read through the lens of an erotic novel, it sounds very exciting. Let’s have the next line please!
Lmao. Whispering makes it sound so erotic.
*"You're not strong enough to withstand the coming storm"* the devil whispered in my ear, pressing his bulge against my thigh. I could feel his stubble gently scratch my cheek as my pants grew tighter.
*"I AM the storm"* I whisper back, forcing the devil on his stomach so he could feel my whole storm
Unfortunately your comment was removed because you don't
have enough reddit cookies (aka karma). We added a cookie threshold to prevent
spam. Get 20 reddit cookies and you can comment here. We are sorry for the
inconvenience. We love you.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/iamverybadass) if you have any questions or concerns.*
F’n boot. Jesus Christ.
I prefer the one that goes The devil whispered "you're not strong enough to weather the storm" and I replied "get fucked nerd, you lost a fiddling contest to some hillbilly in the boondocks"
The devil whispered "you're not strong enough to weather the storm" and I replied "I love your delicious egg recipe"
And then he said I apologise, please spare me as it was a minor error on my part sire! I could not identify you from afar since you were without the usual 2 sets of truck nuts in your mouth; it was only when I came about 18 yards closer that the waft of your smegma and the sound of heavy moufbreathing struck me as familiar.
Guy was probably 0141
I’m saving this for my MySpace quote.
That’s some boot shit
Probably a pog always took pictures during rifle range week and ran from colors. Or they were a dirt bag with no actual self identity when they EAS'd so then they just cling to stupid shit like this to help with their confidence issues. Source: pog and hated fuckers like this.
My friend joined the USMC about two years back. He's admin, and he has this exact same sticker on his 2012 camaro. He's a walking stereotype. Can't handle his alcohol, always getting into fistfights with people for no reason, etc. I'm counting the days till he marries a stripper.
🙄
You and the devil are gay af together lol
The worst part about this is that everything is capitalized besides "The"
Careless whispers.
Sweet nothings.
Kinda makes me want to listen to Stormfront by Billy Joel.
He is very bad ass
He probably is, honestly. I’d talk to him
Are you the “Devil”
Kinky
The devil likes real dirty talk. He rates this 6/10.
Small pee pee energy
Cringe Volibear main
🎶I am the storm that is approaching!🎶
provoking
It’s like the quote that started it all for these people
Yesterday Satan stuck his dick in my butt. Today I am the dick
Sooooo... you eventually fucked yourself?
Outlook, cloudy with drizzle.
Wasn’t storm a female in the X-men who had tantrums, seems legit.
Cringe
Oooh...the storm. I'm afraid.
He’s going to hell for talking to the devil
He IS the helllll
This implies he works for the Devil
So many opportunities to make this funny, and they just stuck with cringe. Personally, I think "Today I whispered in the devil's ear, 'I am Groot' " would be hysterical.
'and the devil laughed and said aww muffin, that's adorable"
Are they perchance…. In a desert?
The devil whispered in my ear "you are not strong enough to withstand the storm" Today I whispered to the devil "One cheeseburger with fries and *extra* large coke"
highly doubt he was even in the military, and if he was, likely POG lmfao
Only admin and food service Marines have these stickers like these lol
I knew a guy in my last army reserve unit whod done all sorts of extra combat training, which I guess is cool, except we were a public affairs unit and he'd been an army broadcast journalist his entire time in.
What does POG mean?
Person other than grunt. While sometimes it refers to non-infantry, mostly it refers to soft skill MOSs.
r/whyisitalwaysadodge
Why is it "today"? It makes it really stilts the quote. Also, as cringe as this is, let's be careful we aren't catching too much of people's plates, lol
I think the point they are trying to make (badly) is the person wasn’t strong enough but then became a marine so now they are.
Aha, that makes sense
Ok, yeah, it's cringe. But can we talk about why the capitalization in the first "The" is different than the rest of the sticker?
The military loves on this sort of cringe to recruit the type of idiots who think it's badass.
r/JustBootThings
Didn’t know this existed, tysm
Peak cringe
“I am the storm” *bites 6 crayons at once*
*Hey lil' devil let me whisper in yo ear...*
I hate this fuckin stupid string of words.
They’re never clever. It’s always verbose and uninteresting, just like the shirts they wear.
People love stupid shit like that.
Who wants to bet owner isn't even actually a Marine?
Dropped in boot camp.
Context: they were in bed
https://preview.redd.it/fx8e163dre9d1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a72a51acc8e41f58118bc14e0cdd92f8586df3fb
*dudun* **I AM THE STORM THAT IS A APPROAAAAACHIIIIIING** *dudun*
They are the chosen
That's some boot ass shit there.
Typical RAM behavior.
The Devil. 
Why is he and the devil whispering into each others ears?
This is gayer than being inside another man.
We were all inside a man once. But that shit is still gay AF
I guess it makes for some good foreplay talk? Brokeback Demons
You better watch out for that Billy Badass
Dude, just say you have schizophrenia. No need to be so allegorical
Seriously, talk to psychiatrist about those auditory hallucinations. There are some very effective medications out there.
The aunt I hate got me a bracelet with this engraved on it. It went in the trash.
I am the sharknado 😎
I am the walrus.
Plot twist. They said this to each other while having sex with one another. Why else would they be whispering.
‘And then I tickled the devil and he giggled’
Seems awfully intimate with the devil
Stop making bumper stickers out of the Devil and I's pillow talk
Well now I need to see an opthamologist because my retina detatched from the eye roll I did.
It's very neighborly to warn everyone you hear voices, and think they are real.
Not that he exists, but going by the Bible it seems like all the devil wanted us to think for ourselves rather than being dictated to by a habitual destroyer of men, women and children who supposedly “loves” us. What did the devil even do that was so bad except to rightfully rebel against his insane father (if you believe in that sub-narrative)?
Non serviam, bitches
The devil gon getcha tho
You just know a 5'7" guy is getting out of that truck
At least 15 driver side selfies for his fb profile pics
And he’s chewing on a crayon.
Little people wishing they weren't
Seems he replaced the girl with butterflies to a Marines logo, in which I bet he was never in.
Ah yes, idiotic Trumpian Q-Anonsense. It never seems to end. With the Marines logo? Weird flex....
I used to know a guy like this. He drove a RAM truck too. He was actually in the military. Somehow. I was always nice to him because I felt bad for him and he was actually a pretty nice dude. One of the funniest things I've ever seen in my life involved him. I was at a party outside on a deck with about a dozen people on the lawn and deck. It was night time. The dude pulls up in his new RAM (probably 30+% interest if I had to guess, iykyk) and gets out with all his usual swagger. He thinks REALLY highly of himself and he'll gladly let you know. He starts loudly talking about how bad ass and cool he was until everyone outside was looking at him and he was the only one talking. He strolls past a group of girls and comes to talk to me and a couple of my friends. Just after he walks past the girls he jumps and grabs the railing of the deck and swings his legs over. Right into a charcoal grill on the other side of the railing. The grill goes down. He goes down. Charcoal is everywhere. He landed HARD on top of the grill. He was hurt. EVERYONE busted out laughing harder than I've ever heard a group of people laugh. Ever. We helped him up. He probably felt awkward.
Too busy thinking about his entrance to think about his exit.
Horny
This is the man who got kicked out after 90 days.
LMFAO
So, is Satan a generous lover?
If they were actually a marine I don't really mind it too much. If they served on a battlefield then they are actually pretty badass.
Sticker is still dumb.
Fair
just marines being marines, there's a reason they're eating crayons
Are they in bed together making whispery pillow talk? In a lovers embrace? How is all this sexually charged whispering in ears happening? Honestly when read through the lens of an erotic novel, it sounds very exciting. Let’s have the next line please!
Beat me to it
Then, the IMF mission brief started to play. I always choose to accept.
Self-Affirmation for people who think they're too tough to need self-affirmation... It goes really well with the emotional support vehicle..
Today I whispered in the devil’s ear “I love you”
I whispered that I love his eggs.
Let me guess: giant manicured beard, polarized Oakleys, Black Label Coffee Company shirt, infadel tattoo in Arabic on his forearm?
I'm just happy they got the right version of "You're"
Randy - I AM THE LIQUOR
The shit chickens have come home to shit roost, Randers.
Lmao. Whispering makes it sound so erotic. *"You're not strong enough to withstand the coming storm"* the devil whispered in my ear, pressing his bulge against my thigh. I could feel his stubble gently scratch my cheek as my pants grew tighter. *"I AM the storm"* I whisper back, forcing the devil on his stomach so he could feel my whole storm
"I am the storm." Whispered Dennis Reynolds
I am a god. A GOLDEN GOD.
[удалено]
Unfortunately your comment was removed because you don't have enough reddit cookies (aka karma). We added a cookie threshold to prevent spam. Get 20 reddit cookies and you can comment here. We are sorry for the inconvenience. We love you. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/iamverybadass) if you have any questions or concerns.*
And then the devil and I kissed and I got the literal hottest handy
Congrats, I’m sure the devil was blown away by the scathing come-back you delivered the NEXT day.
Lmao, didn't catch that at first. Dude had to shower to come up with a comeback.
They never said when the first part happened. It could've been years ago.
Guarantee that is on the back of a boots vehicle
