WTF is going on in that classroom. I don't blame your daughter for being scared to return to class. An immediate meeting with the teacher her & principal is needed asap.
Is this in the US?
I’m planning on going Monday to talk with the principal and it is. Hopefully I can get it resolved, the boy needs some type of help clearly. Being that young and threatening with that type of violence already.
take photos of her black eyes for evidence. If the Principal or the teachers don't listen. Flag it to the school board and maybe take it to the police.
Double edged sword. There was that kid that made a finger gun, pointed it at a student and threatened to kill them. He got suspended and the news story that got spread around was “student suspended for making a finger gun people are way too sensitive these days.”
True. But sometimes, to paraphrase the Green Day song ¡Viva la Gloria! you got to “blast your name in graffiti on the walls.” This is one of those times.
I don’t think making an enemy out of the school her daughter will be attending for years on is the best move in the initial phases. A simple conversation (and possibly several more with other parents) *should* suffice.
You don't need to start here. Go to the principal, give them a day or 2 to find a satisfying solution, then go to the administration and school board. No administrator will be okay with a student making death threats and if they are, then it's time for the news.
That’s why I said if all else fails. Not right away. But it’s a good thing for OP(or anyone in a similar situation) to keep in their back pocket just in case.
Also find a way to document the meeting and what is being discussed so you have a paper trail and they can’t turn it into a he said she said. I’m hate that other parents have to experience bullying to this extreme but know that you aren’t alone. I went through something very similar with my child.
Everytime they got off the bus I ask them how there day went. If there are physical marks, I take pictures. I would send them asap and include the teacher, vice principal and principal in the email that way the teacher can’t escape the bosses awareness. It happens and they try to sweep it under the rug. Before that meeting ends be sure there is a detailed plan in place to keep your daughter safe and prevent the other child from verbally and physically abusing her(descriptive and legal). Use those words. Also what will happen if it happens again. Make sure though they don’t try to delicately handle the other child. They need consequences. . If you can have someone go with you it helps so they can’t walk around on the issue. Don’t forget to ask the plan be put in writing, with the active date being tomorrow. Speaking from too much experience sadly.
We need to help our kids because the system seems to favor bullies right now. I hope your meeting goes well.
Yeah... so the thing is, that's not atypical. I teach pre-k/kindergarten. Children this age don't really understand death on a visceral level yet, so they don't get how big a deal it is. I have to give the "hey, do you understand what killing someone really MEANS?" talk at least 3 times a year. About half the time they start crying, because they really didnt understand what it means. When children's media features fights as often as it does, of course the children are going to follow suit.
As an elementary teacher, make them fucking pay. I wouldn't let that go easily. Make as much noise as needed, including getting in touch with anyone in charge of the school. Also this does count as endangerment in most places and social services might be interested in this.
I don’t see enough information here to indicate that this was that serious… some of you all overreact pretty quickly. My kid got punched in the nose at a birthday party and got a nosebleed— he survived. He is fine.
We also don’t know if another kid actually punched her in the eyes or if she just said that. six-year-olds are weird and say weird things. I had a friend whose daughter came home saying that she got hurt by a boy and my friend got all up in arms about it— and a week later her daughter recanted it.
There’s nothing here indicating some serious systemic problem.
......when a child threatens that take it seriously. Just look at the teacher who was shot by a kid this very age. They are hearing it somewhere and they might have the means to actually harm. You don't know and that's why any threat of violence should be taken as a realistic threat.
Call and make an appointment with the principal and tell them why. This gives them time to investigate. If the teacher didn't tell the principal, they won't know anything.
The teacher told the principal, I don’t know if the kid has any mental issues like the one who punched her (apparently that’s why he didn’t get in trouble). I’m going up there Monday and talk to the principal cause this is freaking insane. For him to be so young and threatening that type of violence already. I’ve notice on the field trips he’s always out of hand and his mother literally has no control.
>I don’t know if the kid has any mental issues like the one who punched her
If their mental issues pose a threat to other students, they need to be removed from the classroom. They don't need to be coddled and told that it's ok, because it's not. That kid needs counseling because he needs to start learning coping skills now.
>For him to be so young and threatening that type of violence already. I’ve notice on the field trips he’s always out of hand and his mother literally has no control.
This is alarming. I hate to say it, but maybe CPS needs to be involved because there's something obviously wrong in that home. If he happens to be neurodivergent and he's not being treated properly, it's going to show through his behavior.
Both of these kids are threats to other children at worst, and a distraction at best. Their presence in that classroom benefits no one and it seems like they need more individual attention.
Easier said that done, sadly.
35 years ago, a boy in first grade told my daughter in rather graphic terms that he was going to rape her. The kid had said similar things to other little girls, causing one mom (who lived next door to him) to walk her daughter to and from school every day for the entire year. These were the days when people near the school sometimes let their children walk with other parents, but this mom couldn't see her way clear to doing that, knowing this boy was in the mix.
The boy had a horrible home life. He knew way too much about adult sexuality.
And, last week, a boy in fourth grade struck and pushed a girl much smaller than him to the ground and began kicking her. My granddaughter and some boys pulled him off. There was a scuffle. All the witnesses (all children) said the same thing - boy had started it (while saying some really unpleasant things as well).
The week before that, same boy had started a different scuffle.
Since it's near the end of the school year, I predict nothing will be done.
School Boards/District need to be sued, quite frankly. That's all they understand. Mainstreaming every kid is a big issue. Some kids need close supervision to avoid actual harm to others (not just disruption - but disruption of learning for others should be addressed as well).
This costs money - and it's up to the School Board to figure out how to fund it.
This. The new thing in schools is to keep the one kid who has a shitty home life safe and comfortable in school despite the other 20+ kids in the class. It’s beyond messed up. I’m a teacher and at a loss about what to do with my own kids when they’re school aged because public education is such a dumpsterfire right now.
I’m looking at a local charter school that has a ton of outdoor time and is nature based for k-5. It’s a public charter with a lottery system so kids with behavior problems aren’t excluded, but I really think being cooped up in a classroom all day exacerbates those behaviors so I’m hoping the charter route helps.
If the student is a SPED student, nothing can/will be done. From my experience, someone telling them to "stop" is the full extent of it. You can talk to the school counselor, admin , etc., but if the student is neurotypical, they can behave in whatever manner and excuses are made for them. It's absolutely heartbreaking.
Yeah, my wife was a para for an autistic 1st grade boy here in Denver. He was extremely violent, she got in trouble for trying to physically restrain him when he was being a danger. She was told that no hands can be laid on the kid, even if he’s running into traffic. There were two other SPED kids in her class. One was extremely violent and would beat the teachers and paras. One para asked him if he hit his mother this way and he replied “No because she’ll hit me back, but I know you can’t.” This kid doesn’t even have any type of diagnosis or anything, he just seems to be an asshole because of his parents who victim blame the teachers or children who get hurt by him.
When one of these kids does something like this, one of the people that are qualified to restrain them takes them out to the playground for a bit, gives them candy or something to calm down, then just brings them back to class.
That’s why my wife ended up quitting and we pulled our daughters out to homeschool. They were luckily in a different school in the same district that wasn’t quite as bad yet, but my youngest in K already started emulating the behavior of a new autistic boy in her class who has some of the same issues as the others, but luckily didn’t seem quite as violent. But talking to their teachers, this school is headed in the same direction. Multiple teachers are leaving the education system completely at the end of the semester, This was two months ago and my two daughters’ learning and behavior has drastically improved already.
I wouldn't send my kid back until this is fixed. The kid threatening to kill her needs to be removed. Another kid punched her in both eyes? That's pretty calculated for a kindergartener. That classroom is not safe. Your child is not safe there. You need to be up there asap.
I had this happen to me as a junior in high school. (Death threat) My parents and I went to the principle and there was an in school restraining order put on the other person. This may be different as a kindergartener because of maturity levels. This is where they can't interact beyond things like "excuse me" if they are in the way. If the other party violates this, they get suspended or expelled. If I had, the protection goes away.
Please complain to the principal! I’m a teacher and kids have threatened to kill me or kill others all the time and when I bring it to the principal she sends them right back to my classroom with zero consequences. I’d say I know he’s 9 and he can’t actually hurt me but what about when he’s 13 or 15? We’re letting him know this behavior is ok. This is why when I get pregnant I’m not teaching anymore, it just isn’t safe. And it’s not just my school, it’s all over the place.
Look at that 1st grader who shot his teacher, at any age they can use a gun if they know how. I’m afraid for his future honestly. I really hope I can get somewhere when I go to talk to the principal.
I’m sorry that happened to her, but when I was getting threatened in elementary school my parents threaten to sue then the boy was removed from the school, but idk how that will work
You are actually helping that child. He needs intervention now before he old enough to cause damage and move into the juvinal justice system instead of the mental health system. Quite often there is something going on at home. Don't let anyone tell you are overreacting. Protect your daughter.
I'd call the police and show them what the teacher sent you.
The Red flags in this are so many, I have no answer other than Run.
The fact your kid gets hurt and the school doesn't tell you is where I personally draw the line.
Because you could argue kids say whatever. Children aren't good people. They say shit they don't know the gravity of. But if you're telling me your child gets physically aggressed and the school ignores it, that is unacceptable.
Call the police, make a meeting with the principal and sue the school, school district and the child’s parents. Then call the local news and report school threats that are being brushed under the rug.
You need to request a meeting with the principal, teachers, and nurse or school psychologist. And you need to ask them what their plan is for keeping your child safe, and feeling safe. And ask them how they plan to track the progress/issue. And don't let them not answer you.
My son was choked, yes choked by another kindergartender. That same kindergartener climbed under stalls to watch my son urinate.
I am a CSA survivor, so as you can imagine, I went rouge (in private, with my husband so he could write into words what I couldn't express)...and drilled them hard on what their plan of action is.
Don't let them get away with it. Press charges, if you can.
I agree. I would go into the police department personally and ask to report a crime. Police won't do anything either, but then get a copy of that report and take it to the public comment section of the School Board (bring enough copies for every member to have one and then extras for the record keeper of that meeting).
Do not mention the child's name at the public mic, but mention the name of the school and its principal (who will be at the meeting in most instances).
It will get their attention. Organize other parents to go as well.
I would see if there is a school resource officer and if so request they be in any meeting with admin. Sometimes they are useless but sometimes they really can help.
This happened to a little girl that I was a nanny to. Only the school handled it appropriately and immediately suspended the child and required him to be evaluated by a mental health professional. Then he had to apologize to her after it was determined that he was not a real threat. Make sure you ask them how they plan to keep your child safe. How are they evaluating the validity of these threats?
We had a kinder student verbally threaten to kill my kinder kid and her parents (us) this year after a couple of weeks of targeted harrassment and playground incidents. That was rough. We advocated for mental health intervention for the child and age appropriate social-emotional lessons for our kiddo and their classroom peers.
We also initiated a safety plan for our child where the other child remained far away from and my kid was in sight of a safe adult and supervised at all times.
For the love of all that's holy, this sub is toxic. Here's what you do:
You remember that kids blindly repeat their parents. You remember that (while not ideal) kids (and adults) can say "oh, I'm gonna kill you" while playing pretend, losing a game, playing superheros, playing cops and robbers, any variety of situation. You think about the fact that children are historically terrible reporters and retellers and sometimes things come across not quite right.
THEN you calmly email the teacher (cc the principal if you feel like it) and you seek clarification. You ask your questions as if you're a sane adult talking to another sane adult. If you feel you're unable to get clarification, you calmly set an appointment with admin and respectfully discuss your concerns.
A few important notes:
the other child's life/consequences/situation are not your business and you are not entitled to that information, just as his parents aren't entitled to your daughters information.
You are the parent. You are allowed to keep your daughter home until you feel it's safe for her to return.
School is out in 4 weeks. 20-ish schools days. Plan accordingly.
I would *insist* on an in person meeting with the principal of the school (I know you’re going in Monday) and your kid’s teacher and raise holy hell. Jeez, your poor kid.
Keep excellent records of *every interaction* on this topic. We found out too late that the school policy is to dispose of all records every summer "so each new school year can start fresh." Which means that each new school year starts with *no history* and no action will be taken until a completely new pattern of behavior is documented. They turned running out the clock into an art form.
"Should be illegal" doesn't seem to deter schools. Actually **is illegal** didn't stop them from purging records in some cases I personally know about.
Leave the school. We just dealt with the public school near us (supposedly “great” schools) mishandling abuse toward my son for almost a year. He got the point where he was telling me he wanted to die. His doctor was urging us to put him on Prozac. He was also in Kindergarten. We pulled him from school after trying to work with the school for 8 months past the abuse ending, and 4 months into homeschooling, he is almost back to the child I knew before. We almost lost our child. It’s not worth it. The school will NEVER handle it well if this is how they have been handling it so far. Save yourself months of fighting for your child’s safety and just pull them out. If this happened while your child was over at a family member or friends house, would you ever let them go back alone again? Probably not. Why does the school get a pass just because they are an institution?? Would you be okay with this happening in your work environment or would you get a new job if one of your colleagues was physically and verbally assaulting others???
As a former teacher, I personally do not have faith in our public schools anymore. I don’t think schools have to staffing to actually keep kids safe these days. In my son’s class it was the teacher abusing the students. So many parents came forward and we (families who complained) were all silenced and moved to another class mid year. The teacher is still teaching. In the class of my best friends kid, a 7 year old was forcing other 6 and 7 year old girls and boys into the boys bathroom and forcing them to take off their pants and play with his private parts. He was also doing it IN THE CLASSROOM while the teacher was present and at lunch time, touching other kids under the lunch table. The kid is still in the school after many parents complained. The school made all kinds of allowances for the offending child and basically tried to shift the blame onto the students who were abused. This is supposedly the best school system in this part of the state (Midwest USA, affluent area). The schools are too stressed physically and financially to deal with the various complex needs of the students that attend. One human cannot manage 26+ kids - kids that have grown up in the pandemic stress, kids who have free access to the internet and are mirroring behavior that they see on a screen and don’t understand, kids whose parents do not care about their bad behavior and do not plan to help them learn healthy behavior, kids who have special needs (don’t even get me started on how lacking the support for special needs kids is - from a teacher/parent perspective). The parents of the boy who was sexually assaulting the kids in his class thought it was funny what their son was doing. Things are not okay in schools right now. We’re enrolling my son in a tiny private school next fall. 6:1 ratio. He came from a classroom of 31:1 in public school. 31 7 years olds and one teacher. Idk how that makes sense to anyone.
Also a large school district near me (large university town, very liberal) was just sued by a group of parents whose autistic children were being physically beaten by parapro’s in the classroom and on the bus. One of the children lost their life. The district superintendent and the building principal had known about the abuse for over a year and did not fire the teachers or even tell the parents that their children were being abused when the parents came to them asking why their children were beat up looking. Many of the students were not reliable communicators and could not express what was going on. The teachers were finally caught when the police pulled footage from the school bus. Again one of the best school districts in the Midwest. This is not a good time for public schools.
Please use your heart and your gut DO NOT try to logic away this problem and give endless second chances. It’s NOT worth it. We are going to be attending this private school using a mix of fundraising, scholarships, and volunteering to pay tuition.
Just added the last bit to say that there are other options. Just have to be very creative in how you make them work if you’re not wealthy. We are not wealthy enough to just shell out for private school. But we also just love our kid too much to send him back into these public institutions that are really failing our kids. Childhood is too precious. It’s not worth the fight. Believe people when they show you how much they care for you (and your child). Take them at face value. They have failed to protect your child so far. Why do you assume they will change? This situation is likely going on in some form in every classroom in the school.
Go to the police. File a police report that your child recieved a death threat at school, and has previously been assaulted. Word it like that.
ETA - also no, do not bother with the school. They chose not to help already. Instead, take the police report to the media and state that you wish to remain anonymous but have a tip for them about violence getting out of control at a local school
UPDATE: I went and spoke with the principal, she was actually out that day. She wasn’t told about this so she wasn’t aware of it. And she wasn’t aware that they never did call me about her getting punch but she will be leaving a note that they have to call the parent of the victim too.
She told me their protocol and told me she will go and make sure he’s not in her class and remove him if he is.
The protocol is whenever a student threatens to harm/kill another student or their own self:
1. They get removed from the classroom and took to the nurse.
2. They ask a list of questions and if they seem like they are serious/understand the threat/actions they said then they’re sent home and can’t return til a doctor release them.
She also told me she will be going thru his backpack everyday.
I’m gonna see if it changes but if it doesn’t then the only choice I have is homeschooling.
Honestly, going through the backpack is not enough. People don't need weapons to kill. Personally, I would not be willing to risk sending my daughter back to that school. Based on the fact that it evidently wasn't already policy (if that's not a lie, too) to call parents when their children get hurt, it sounds to me like this school is more concerned with keeping the peace than its charges' safety. Please do what is BEST for your child, not what is easiest.
That said, I know homeschooling can be overwhelming and scary. I was homeschooled for most of my schooling, and even I'm a bit daunted by the prospect of homeschooling my own children, ha. However, there are MANY resources available to you, including guided curricula, homeschool co-ops (groups of homeschooling families that get together to learn, go on field trips, etc.), and more. I would start by visiting r/homeschool, and go from there. You'll find support, encouragement, advice, and acceptance.
Best of luck to you and your family, whatever decision you make. <3
Here's a sneak peek of /r/homeschool using the [top posts](https://np.reddit.com/r/homeschool/top/?sort=top&t=year) of the year!
\#1: [PSA: Use the “public school” grade.](https://np.reddit.com/r/homeschool/comments/17m4m3q/psa_use_the_public_school_grade/)
\#2: [Listen to homeschool alumni. Get a GED. Don’t waste your time with a homeschool diploma.](https://np.reddit.com/r/homeschool/comments/16syn3d/listen_to_homeschool_alumni_get_a_ged_dont_waste/)
\#3: [Daughter insists she wants to homeschool. Any request to do school is then met with whining.](https://np.reddit.com/r/homeschool/comments/17bmv34/daughter_insists_she_wants_to_homeschool_any/)
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I should mention your daughter has a right to an education. Physical harm and ongoing intimidation is a federal obstacle that the district has an obligation to act on.
At this point, we just don't know if your teacher is a first-year who has lost control of the classroom, a longterm sub, or something else. We don't know if the principal is unaware bc the teacher is covering their ass, or if the principal is aware and negligent. (I have coached in a school where I observed some of the most traumatic classroom environments I have ever seen, the principal was aware and just hanging out in the front office.)
Are there any discrimination / title 6 concerns relating to your daughter's experiences?
Whatever meetings you take, be sure to take a second person with you. Your emotions will be heightened (of course and rightfully so) and you want to be sure you are hearing all that is being communicated and that you are asking questions and have a plan before you leave. If I may suggest also keep a log of communications with the school. Best of luck and I am sorry for your daughter, how terrible for her to have to go through this.
I’m kindergarten teacher and this was not handled properly. When your child was punched in the eyes she should have been taken to the nurse where it was documented and then the nurse should have called you and told you what happened. That child should have been written up regardless of his mental state.
Now for this one the teacher should have called you personally about what happens and the child should have been written up. His parents should have been called as well. If this child is has been aggressive all school year I hope it has been documented so they can be evaluated. Hopefully they end up in a behavioral unit where they can serviced and helped. We have these on our campus for lower elementary and upper elementary.
Mind you in kindergarten there is not much that can be done in the way of discipline. They can’t be suspended until the 3 rd grade at least at my district. The most they get is lunch detention and will not be allowed to join in on the fun activities at the end of the year.
Thats weird
Here they are sent home and suspended if they physically injure anyone else. Especially if its another student. Unless they have an iep.... they cannot be expelled though so they just keep increasing the suspension time i think 1 day then 3 days then 5.
Request a meeting with administration immediately. Also if the school has a fb page start there too who knows how long this has been happening and if there are other parents are wondering the same. In my district threats like that are an automatic one week suspension regardless of the the grade.
No Fing way would my kid ever step foot in that school again. I would sell my kidney to put my kid in a different school before I would put up with this type of nachalance about violence from 6 year old kids.
My two cents here: definitely talk to the principal and also write a letter detailing the incidents and the impact this is having. They should take action immediately.
Document everything first and foremost. Take pictures of your daughter's injuries, and write down everything she says happened. Send an email to the teacher demanding an explanation of what occurred and what was witnessed. Keep everything in writing, do not answer a phone call.
Because your daughter was physically assaulted by a student, you need to file a police report immediately. File a separate report for the threats.
Actually, the school was under the obligation to call the police when she was assaulted and also when she was threatened
Hire an attorney and file a formal complaint against the teacher and the school with the board of education and CPS
Stop sending her there. It is not safe and your duty as a parent is to protect her. You need to find a different school for her or homeschool her before something worse happens.
I live in NJ. You can file a HIB report in my state. You can even file it with the police if you feel the district won’t take this serious. You may want to look up the Harassment, intimidation, bullying policy for your state.
I’d schedule a meeting with the principal so that he/she is aware that the teacher is not informing you of these things.
If the principal doesn’t handle it in accordance with the schools anti-bullying policy (a requirement in my state), I’d contact the police.
Pull her now, ask questions later. That is an unsafe environment, and if she were mine, she would have been gone after the getting punched in the eyes thing.
I have a nephew that does the threatening and the school and his parents don't take it seriously. Please raise hell for your daughter. You are her best advocate and you'll teach her to stand up for herself in the process.
Yeah me and my brother are barely speaking due to this. I hate that you're going thru it too, but it is nice to hear that we aren't the only family experiencing it. I feel so helpless.
This may come across harsh but you are her parent not the school. Be sending her back you are telling the school you are okay with the behavior and you are telling your daughter that you condone her being treated this way which will fully affect her sharing future abuse. What’s the point in telling you anything if you don’t put a stop to it. You can’t make that child stop but you can remove your child from an unsafe environment. This is your kid, nothing else should come above her needs. This is not normal behavior but schools rarely suspend students anymore so the buck will have to stop with you. Take the meetings, contact CPS but you will most likely have to transfer her to another school or finish the year at home. I am sorry your daughter is experiencing so much trauma in a place that should be safe.
As a former teacher, I know all too well how Admin and even some teachers will try to take care of things within the school or classroom. This should go directly to the police. Your child was assaulted. schools are ill-prepared to handle these situations that go well beyond classroom management. You have every right to demand that the child who hit yours be moved to a different classroom at bare minimum, even this late in the school year. You also have every right to get an order of protection through the police and courts for your child. Finally, this needs to be brought to the attention of the Superintendant of the district because that teacher has a duty to report this incident to you and the principal.
Idk, they play games like "poison" where you run around like playing tag, but if you get tagged, you "die"
The video game Among US is about finding the "Imposter" and putting him out the air lock of the space station and the imposter us basically a serial killer, but it's cartoonish, and basically a Clue game in space.
1. Start google sheets with list of events thus far. Update with all information as time goes on.
2. Meet w principal. You need to be clear about what has happened, and come up with a list of things that you do not know. Ask direct questions to understand the parts you don't know and ensure that you get direct answers. For example, "my child was punched in bithbeyes two weeks ago, and i recieved a handwritten note. Were you aware this happened? (Answer.) Did you have a conversation with the teacher about this incident, and what was that conversation? (Answer.) Is this the school policy for reporting harm? (Answer.) Is this the district policy for physical harm against a student? (Answer.)" Take notes so you don't have to remember anything. If the principal implies that they cannot discuss the specifics of any incidents (for example, the conversation they had with the teacher), clarify if they cannot discuss it because of a formal hr process. If so, that makes sense. If there isnt, then clarify why they cannot discuss the content of that conversation. Do not let them conflate student privacy with other information you should have a right to know.
3. Follow up in this meeting with a summary email of your understanding. Include details to the questions above, as well as ongoing concerns. In the end, you are either asking the principal what they are doing to ensure your child's safety or you are demanding a particular resolution. Cc the person who your principal reports to. In my district, these are called IAS (instructional asst superintendents). At that point, you will be summarizing what has happened to the child, what the teacher did, what the principal knew, and how the principal has handled it. We can help you write it, if necessary.
4. Anticipate that the meeting with not be satisfactory, as the principal has conflicting self interests. Yes, they want the school to be safe, but more importantly, they dont want anyone outside the school to know it is not. Be prepared to file a complaint against at the central office.
5. Imo, the local news is NOT the next step. You will have a process at the central office regarding the hr complaint. Remember that the district hr department is not a neutral group. They are there to protect the district. Reach out to any local parent advocate groups to assist with that. If you go to the news before doing a complaint, the comms person for the district will simply say on camera that they had no idea this was happening and they will initiate communication with you, which will not have the force of hr behind it.
6. If the outcome of the hr complaint is unsatisfactory, then you go to the local news. Bc you have done things in this order, you will be airing out the teacher, the principal and the central office. If hr knows this, they will try to avoid it at all costs.
Take the note from the school & go to the police station & file a report then contact the state education department & file a formal complaint against the principal & teachers involved.
Hospital to document the injuries. Police report. In that order. Don’t rely on school admin to resolve that horrific situation properly. They will be forced to resolve it properly if this is documented. Don’t wait.
Ok, this happened to my daughter this year in Kindergarten as well. After I picked her up crying saying she was hiding in the bathroom because her friends told her to hide from the boy that wanted to kill her, we immediately made an appointment with the principal. The child in question was moved to a different class and there was a “no contact contract” signed between both my daughter and the other child. He was put into a separate lunch area from my daughter and my daughter was instructed to inform a security guard or teacher if she was approached by this other kid at any point in time. This all wrapped up at the end of the first semester and she hasn’t had any complaints about him in a few months.
Please for the love of God don't let your daughter go back to that school until something is done...maybe even just period. From the look of it your daughter is in danger and the school will do NOTHING about it until it's too late.
Wow this infuriates me. Kindergartners don’t have phones, which means their teachers HAVE to be their advocates. I’m sure your daughter wanted nothing more than to call her mom when she got punched and she had to wait??? Not to mention this new incident…I’m sorry, but I’d go full mama bear Karen on these people.
First of all, this is not your fault, you couldn’t have foreseen this, when you drop your kids at school you should be able to trust that you’ll be the first to know if something happens with your child. However, I would definitely take this opportunity to have a talk with your daughter about advocating for herself. That you will ALWAYS be there for her, but as she gets older, there will unfortunately be times that she’s gonna need to speak up even when she’s scared. Just like we tell our kids to kick and scream and bite if a stranger ever picks them up, we need to tell them that if they are not comfortable or feeling hear, then we need to make ourselves heard. If she wants to call mom, she gets to call mom, period. If she has to “break rules” and tell her adult teachers no I need to speak with my mom I am not feeling safe/okay/whatever. She can cry she can yell she can do whatever she needs to do to get mom on the phone, always, no matter where she is or who she’s with. (Obvs not if like she just misses you or wants to say hi lol but in situations like these)
Otherwise, I probably wouldn’t trust the school anymore, but I do understand changing schools is just not always possible, in that case I’d just be up their ass honestly. It’s scary enough sending kids to school these days, parents should at the very least be able to sleep peacefully knowing the staff and teachers at school are lookin out for your kid, and being proactive about communication should anything happen. Best of luck, so sorry this is happening 🫶
If you are in the US make a police report (yes literally), and call the state board of education and notify them that the school has not done anything. Then to top it off, file a complaint against the teacher as well. My daughter was physically assaulted on the bus by a 5th grader on her first day of school years ago. The school ALSO didnt want to do anything until we said we were filing a police report and wanting this child charged with assault. Suddenly WE were taking it too far. Nah my 5 year old was YANKED off her bus seat hitting her head on the floor HARD and y'all just gonna move this kids seat and NOT do anything??!? Nah enjoy the psycho mom. ☺️ They tried retaliating against my family for YEARS until the state literally stepped in and proved id have a VERY viable lawsuit against the school and suddenly my kid was no longer the "problem child".
Make noise...lots of and lots of noise... this is happening quietly all across the country even in daycares and learning centers and people dont hold kids and parents accountable tell whoever will listen...police, school board, news...this us how kids who go on to hurt or kill get started
WTF is going on in that classroom. I don't blame your daughter for being scared to return to class. An immediate meeting with the teacher her & principal is needed asap. Is this in the US?
I’m planning on going Monday to talk with the principal and it is. Hopefully I can get it resolved, the boy needs some type of help clearly. Being that young and threatening with that type of violence already.
take photos of her black eyes for evidence. If the Principal or the teachers don't listen. Flag it to the school board and maybe take it to the police.
If no one listens: local news. The threat of ending up on every TV in the region is usually a great motivator.
Double edged sword. There was that kid that made a finger gun, pointed it at a student and threatened to kill them. He got suspended and the news story that got spread around was “student suspended for making a finger gun people are way too sensitive these days.”
Yeah but that along with actually punching a little girl is a very different story
That was a different kid.
True. But sometimes, to paraphrase the Green Day song ¡Viva la Gloria! you got to “blast your name in graffiti on the walls.” This is one of those times.
One of my favorites of theirs, along with the ¿? song by the same name.
YAAS!!!!!
I don’t think making an enemy out of the school her daughter will be attending for years on is the best move in the initial phases. A simple conversation (and possibly several more with other parents) *should* suffice.
You don't need to start here. Go to the principal, give them a day or 2 to find a satisfying solution, then go to the administration and school board. No administrator will be okay with a student making death threats and if they are, then it's time for the news.
That’s why I said if all else fails. Not right away. But it’s a good thing for OP(or anyone in a similar situation) to keep in their back pocket just in case.
What black eyes? Did she say her daughter had black eyes or just that her daughter said she was punched in both eyes? I didn’t see this anywhere
true. I might have jumped to conclusions. but if any physical marks, I would still say same advice. Start documenting everything.
Also find a way to document the meeting and what is being discussed so you have a paper trail and they can’t turn it into a he said she said. I’m hate that other parents have to experience bullying to this extreme but know that you aren’t alone. I went through something very similar with my child. Everytime they got off the bus I ask them how there day went. If there are physical marks, I take pictures. I would send them asap and include the teacher, vice principal and principal in the email that way the teacher can’t escape the bosses awareness. It happens and they try to sweep it under the rug. Before that meeting ends be sure there is a detailed plan in place to keep your daughter safe and prevent the other child from verbally and physically abusing her(descriptive and legal). Use those words. Also what will happen if it happens again. Make sure though they don’t try to delicately handle the other child. They need consequences. . If you can have someone go with you it helps so they can’t walk around on the issue. Don’t forget to ask the plan be put in writing, with the active date being tomorrow. Speaking from too much experience sadly. We need to help our kids because the system seems to favor bullies right now. I hope your meeting goes well.
Yeah... so the thing is, that's not atypical. I teach pre-k/kindergarten. Children this age don't really understand death on a visceral level yet, so they don't get how big a deal it is. I have to give the "hey, do you understand what killing someone really MEANS?" talk at least 3 times a year. About half the time they start crying, because they really didnt understand what it means. When children's media features fights as often as it does, of course the children are going to follow suit.
As an elementary teacher, make them fucking pay. I wouldn't let that go easily. Make as much noise as needed, including getting in touch with anyone in charge of the school. Also this does count as endangerment in most places and social services might be interested in this.
Even I'm confused. Like I have a son who struggles to behave in class but he's never punched anyone or threatened to kill them.
He is 6, what are you expecting from the school?
Behavioral intervention? Anger management? Mandated therapy with a child psychologist?
I don’t see enough information here to indicate that this was that serious… some of you all overreact pretty quickly. My kid got punched in the nose at a birthday party and got a nosebleed— he survived. He is fine. We also don’t know if another kid actually punched her in the eyes or if she just said that. six-year-olds are weird and say weird things. I had a friend whose daughter came home saying that she got hurt by a boy and my friend got all up in arms about it— and a week later her daughter recanted it. There’s nothing here indicating some serious systemic problem.
......when a child threatens that take it seriously. Just look at the teacher who was shot by a kid this very age. They are hearing it somewhere and they might have the means to actually harm. You don't know and that's why any threat of violence should be taken as a realistic threat.
Call and make an appointment with the principal and tell them why. This gives them time to investigate. If the teacher didn't tell the principal, they won't know anything.
The teacher told the principal, I don’t know if the kid has any mental issues like the one who punched her (apparently that’s why he didn’t get in trouble). I’m going up there Monday and talk to the principal cause this is freaking insane. For him to be so young and threatening that type of violence already. I’ve notice on the field trips he’s always out of hand and his mother literally has no control.
>I don’t know if the kid has any mental issues like the one who punched her If their mental issues pose a threat to other students, they need to be removed from the classroom. They don't need to be coddled and told that it's ok, because it's not. That kid needs counseling because he needs to start learning coping skills now. >For him to be so young and threatening that type of violence already. I’ve notice on the field trips he’s always out of hand and his mother literally has no control. This is alarming. I hate to say it, but maybe CPS needs to be involved because there's something obviously wrong in that home. If he happens to be neurodivergent and he's not being treated properly, it's going to show through his behavior. Both of these kids are threats to other children at worst, and a distraction at best. Their presence in that classroom benefits no one and it seems like they need more individual attention.
Easier said that done, sadly. 35 years ago, a boy in first grade told my daughter in rather graphic terms that he was going to rape her. The kid had said similar things to other little girls, causing one mom (who lived next door to him) to walk her daughter to and from school every day for the entire year. These were the days when people near the school sometimes let their children walk with other parents, but this mom couldn't see her way clear to doing that, knowing this boy was in the mix. The boy had a horrible home life. He knew way too much about adult sexuality. And, last week, a boy in fourth grade struck and pushed a girl much smaller than him to the ground and began kicking her. My granddaughter and some boys pulled him off. There was a scuffle. All the witnesses (all children) said the same thing - boy had started it (while saying some really unpleasant things as well). The week before that, same boy had started a different scuffle. Since it's near the end of the school year, I predict nothing will be done. School Boards/District need to be sued, quite frankly. That's all they understand. Mainstreaming every kid is a big issue. Some kids need close supervision to avoid actual harm to others (not just disruption - but disruption of learning for others should be addressed as well). This costs money - and it's up to the School Board to figure out how to fund it.
This. The new thing in schools is to keep the one kid who has a shitty home life safe and comfortable in school despite the other 20+ kids in the class. It’s beyond messed up. I’m a teacher and at a loss about what to do with my own kids when they’re school aged because public education is such a dumpsterfire right now.
I’m looking at a local charter school that has a ton of outdoor time and is nature based for k-5. It’s a public charter with a lottery system so kids with behavior problems aren’t excluded, but I really think being cooped up in a classroom all day exacerbates those behaviors so I’m hoping the charter route helps.
If the student is a SPED student, nothing can/will be done. From my experience, someone telling them to "stop" is the full extent of it. You can talk to the school counselor, admin , etc., but if the student is neurotypical, they can behave in whatever manner and excuses are made for them. It's absolutely heartbreaking.
Yeah, my wife was a para for an autistic 1st grade boy here in Denver. He was extremely violent, she got in trouble for trying to physically restrain him when he was being a danger. She was told that no hands can be laid on the kid, even if he’s running into traffic. There were two other SPED kids in her class. One was extremely violent and would beat the teachers and paras. One para asked him if he hit his mother this way and he replied “No because she’ll hit me back, but I know you can’t.” This kid doesn’t even have any type of diagnosis or anything, he just seems to be an asshole because of his parents who victim blame the teachers or children who get hurt by him. When one of these kids does something like this, one of the people that are qualified to restrain them takes them out to the playground for a bit, gives them candy or something to calm down, then just brings them back to class. That’s why my wife ended up quitting and we pulled our daughters out to homeschool. They were luckily in a different school in the same district that wasn’t quite as bad yet, but my youngest in K already started emulating the behavior of a new autistic boy in her class who has some of the same issues as the others, but luckily didn’t seem quite as violent. But talking to their teachers, this school is headed in the same direction. Multiple teachers are leaving the education system completely at the end of the semester, This was two months ago and my two daughters’ learning and behavior has drastically improved already.
That's really sad. Something needs to change. I'm glad your daughters are doing better with the new changes. All the best to you and your wife. ❤
I wouldn't send my kid back until this is fixed. The kid threatening to kill her needs to be removed. Another kid punched her in both eyes? That's pretty calculated for a kindergartener. That classroom is not safe. Your child is not safe there. You need to be up there asap.
I had this happen to me as a junior in high school. (Death threat) My parents and I went to the principle and there was an in school restraining order put on the other person. This may be different as a kindergartener because of maturity levels. This is where they can't interact beyond things like "excuse me" if they are in the way. If the other party violates this, they get suspended or expelled. If I had, the protection goes away.
Please complain to the principal! I’m a teacher and kids have threatened to kill me or kill others all the time and when I bring it to the principal she sends them right back to my classroom with zero consequences. I’d say I know he’s 9 and he can’t actually hurt me but what about when he’s 13 or 15? We’re letting him know this behavior is ok. This is why when I get pregnant I’m not teaching anymore, it just isn’t safe. And it’s not just my school, it’s all over the place.
Look at that 1st grader who shot his teacher, at any age they can use a gun if they know how. I’m afraid for his future honestly. I really hope I can get somewhere when I go to talk to the principal.
That’s true!! These threats need to be taken as seriously as if an adult said them
Yes!! Cause I honestly feel like if he’s already saying/threatening with this type of violence he’s gonna be alot worse as he gets older.
I’m sorry that happened to her, but when I was getting threatened in elementary school my parents threaten to sue then the boy was removed from the school, but idk how that will work
Far lawsuits usually are what it takes to get bloated administrators to listen.
Except that was in like 2010-11, idk how it is now
You are actually helping that child. He needs intervention now before he old enough to cause damage and move into the juvinal justice system instead of the mental health system. Quite often there is something going on at home. Don't let anyone tell you are overreacting. Protect your daughter.
What state do you live in?
Alabama
I'd call the police and show them what the teacher sent you. The Red flags in this are so many, I have no answer other than Run. The fact your kid gets hurt and the school doesn't tell you is where I personally draw the line. Because you could argue kids say whatever. Children aren't good people. They say shit they don't know the gravity of. But if you're telling me your child gets physically aggressed and the school ignores it, that is unacceptable.
Call the police, make a meeting with the principal and sue the school, school district and the child’s parents. Then call the local news and report school threats that are being brushed under the rug.
You need to request a meeting with the principal, teachers, and nurse or school psychologist. And you need to ask them what their plan is for keeping your child safe, and feeling safe. And ask them how they plan to track the progress/issue. And don't let them not answer you. My son was choked, yes choked by another kindergartender. That same kindergartener climbed under stalls to watch my son urinate. I am a CSA survivor, so as you can imagine, I went rouge (in private, with my husband so he could write into words what I couldn't express)...and drilled them hard on what their plan of action is. Don't let them get away with it. Press charges, if you can.
I agree. I would go into the police department personally and ask to report a crime. Police won't do anything either, but then get a copy of that report and take it to the public comment section of the School Board (bring enough copies for every member to have one and then extras for the record keeper of that meeting). Do not mention the child's name at the public mic, but mention the name of the school and its principal (who will be at the meeting in most instances). It will get their attention. Organize other parents to go as well.
I would see if there is a school resource officer and if so request they be in any meeting with admin. Sometimes they are useless but sometimes they really can help.
Take her out of that school
take photos of her black eyes too.
Change schools immediately. If the school didn’t even call you then you can’t trust these people to keep your kid safe.
This happened to a little girl that I was a nanny to. Only the school handled it appropriately and immediately suspended the child and required him to be evaluated by a mental health professional. Then he had to apologize to her after it was determined that he was not a real threat. Make sure you ask them how they plan to keep your child safe. How are they evaluating the validity of these threats?
I'm sorry WHAT? Punched in both eyes? Threatened to kill her? Oh hell no.
That’s sounds like a wildly underfunded and understaffed school. If you can afford it, I’d change schools.
We had a kinder student verbally threaten to kill my kinder kid and her parents (us) this year after a couple of weeks of targeted harrassment and playground incidents. That was rough. We advocated for mental health intervention for the child and age appropriate social-emotional lessons for our kiddo and their classroom peers. We also initiated a safety plan for our child where the other child remained far away from and my kid was in sight of a safe adult and supervised at all times.
For the love of all that's holy, this sub is toxic. Here's what you do: You remember that kids blindly repeat their parents. You remember that (while not ideal) kids (and adults) can say "oh, I'm gonna kill you" while playing pretend, losing a game, playing superheros, playing cops and robbers, any variety of situation. You think about the fact that children are historically terrible reporters and retellers and sometimes things come across not quite right. THEN you calmly email the teacher (cc the principal if you feel like it) and you seek clarification. You ask your questions as if you're a sane adult talking to another sane adult. If you feel you're unable to get clarification, you calmly set an appointment with admin and respectfully discuss your concerns. A few important notes: the other child's life/consequences/situation are not your business and you are not entitled to that information, just as his parents aren't entitled to your daughters information. You are the parent. You are allowed to keep your daughter home until you feel it's safe for her to return. School is out in 4 weeks. 20-ish schools days. Plan accordingly.
I would *insist* on an in person meeting with the principal of the school (I know you’re going in Monday) and your kid’s teacher and raise holy hell. Jeez, your poor kid.
Please don't let this go. A 6 year old shot this teacher last year with a gun he brought to school. You have to take every threat seriously!
Keep excellent records of *every interaction* on this topic. We found out too late that the school policy is to dispose of all records every summer "so each new school year can start fresh." Which means that each new school year starts with *no history* and no action will be taken until a completely new pattern of behavior is documented. They turned running out the clock into an art form.
That should be illegal.
"Should be illegal" doesn't seem to deter schools. Actually **is illegal** didn't stop them from purging records in some cases I personally know about.
Leave the school. We just dealt with the public school near us (supposedly “great” schools) mishandling abuse toward my son for almost a year. He got the point where he was telling me he wanted to die. His doctor was urging us to put him on Prozac. He was also in Kindergarten. We pulled him from school after trying to work with the school for 8 months past the abuse ending, and 4 months into homeschooling, he is almost back to the child I knew before. We almost lost our child. It’s not worth it. The school will NEVER handle it well if this is how they have been handling it so far. Save yourself months of fighting for your child’s safety and just pull them out. If this happened while your child was over at a family member or friends house, would you ever let them go back alone again? Probably not. Why does the school get a pass just because they are an institution?? Would you be okay with this happening in your work environment or would you get a new job if one of your colleagues was physically and verbally assaulting others??? As a former teacher, I personally do not have faith in our public schools anymore. I don’t think schools have to staffing to actually keep kids safe these days. In my son’s class it was the teacher abusing the students. So many parents came forward and we (families who complained) were all silenced and moved to another class mid year. The teacher is still teaching. In the class of my best friends kid, a 7 year old was forcing other 6 and 7 year old girls and boys into the boys bathroom and forcing them to take off their pants and play with his private parts. He was also doing it IN THE CLASSROOM while the teacher was present and at lunch time, touching other kids under the lunch table. The kid is still in the school after many parents complained. The school made all kinds of allowances for the offending child and basically tried to shift the blame onto the students who were abused. This is supposedly the best school system in this part of the state (Midwest USA, affluent area). The schools are too stressed physically and financially to deal with the various complex needs of the students that attend. One human cannot manage 26+ kids - kids that have grown up in the pandemic stress, kids who have free access to the internet and are mirroring behavior that they see on a screen and don’t understand, kids whose parents do not care about their bad behavior and do not plan to help them learn healthy behavior, kids who have special needs (don’t even get me started on how lacking the support for special needs kids is - from a teacher/parent perspective). The parents of the boy who was sexually assaulting the kids in his class thought it was funny what their son was doing. Things are not okay in schools right now. We’re enrolling my son in a tiny private school next fall. 6:1 ratio. He came from a classroom of 31:1 in public school. 31 7 years olds and one teacher. Idk how that makes sense to anyone. Also a large school district near me (large university town, very liberal) was just sued by a group of parents whose autistic children were being physically beaten by parapro’s in the classroom and on the bus. One of the children lost their life. The district superintendent and the building principal had known about the abuse for over a year and did not fire the teachers or even tell the parents that their children were being abused when the parents came to them asking why their children were beat up looking. Many of the students were not reliable communicators and could not express what was going on. The teachers were finally caught when the police pulled footage from the school bus. Again one of the best school districts in the Midwest. This is not a good time for public schools. Please use your heart and your gut DO NOT try to logic away this problem and give endless second chances. It’s NOT worth it. We are going to be attending this private school using a mix of fundraising, scholarships, and volunteering to pay tuition.
Just added the last bit to say that there are other options. Just have to be very creative in how you make them work if you’re not wealthy. We are not wealthy enough to just shell out for private school. But we also just love our kid too much to send him back into these public institutions that are really failing our kids. Childhood is too precious. It’s not worth the fight. Believe people when they show you how much they care for you (and your child). Take them at face value. They have failed to protect your child so far. Why do you assume they will change? This situation is likely going on in some form in every classroom in the school.
Go to the police. File a police report that your child recieved a death threat at school, and has previously been assaulted. Word it like that. ETA - also no, do not bother with the school. They chose not to help already. Instead, take the police report to the media and state that you wish to remain anonymous but have a tip for them about violence getting out of control at a local school
UPDATE: I went and spoke with the principal, she was actually out that day. She wasn’t told about this so she wasn’t aware of it. And she wasn’t aware that they never did call me about her getting punch but she will be leaving a note that they have to call the parent of the victim too. She told me their protocol and told me she will go and make sure he’s not in her class and remove him if he is. The protocol is whenever a student threatens to harm/kill another student or their own self: 1. They get removed from the classroom and took to the nurse. 2. They ask a list of questions and if they seem like they are serious/understand the threat/actions they said then they’re sent home and can’t return til a doctor release them. She also told me she will be going thru his backpack everyday. I’m gonna see if it changes but if it doesn’t then the only choice I have is homeschooling.
Honestly, going through the backpack is not enough. People don't need weapons to kill. Personally, I would not be willing to risk sending my daughter back to that school. Based on the fact that it evidently wasn't already policy (if that's not a lie, too) to call parents when their children get hurt, it sounds to me like this school is more concerned with keeping the peace than its charges' safety. Please do what is BEST for your child, not what is easiest. That said, I know homeschooling can be overwhelming and scary. I was homeschooled for most of my schooling, and even I'm a bit daunted by the prospect of homeschooling my own children, ha. However, there are MANY resources available to you, including guided curricula, homeschool co-ops (groups of homeschooling families that get together to learn, go on field trips, etc.), and more. I would start by visiting r/homeschool, and go from there. You'll find support, encouragement, advice, and acceptance. Best of luck to you and your family, whatever decision you make. <3
Here's a sneak peek of /r/homeschool using the [top posts](https://np.reddit.com/r/homeschool/top/?sort=top&t=year) of the year! \#1: [PSA: Use the “public school” grade.](https://np.reddit.com/r/homeschool/comments/17m4m3q/psa_use_the_public_school_grade/) \#2: [Listen to homeschool alumni. Get a GED. Don’t waste your time with a homeschool diploma.](https://np.reddit.com/r/homeschool/comments/16syn3d/listen_to_homeschool_alumni_get_a_ged_dont_waste/) \#3: [Daughter insists she wants to homeschool. Any request to do school is then met with whining.](https://np.reddit.com/r/homeschool/comments/17bmv34/daughter_insists_she_wants_to_homeschool_any/) ---- ^^I'm ^^a ^^bot, ^^beep ^^boop ^^| ^^Downvote ^^to ^^remove ^^| ^^[Contact](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=sneakpeekbot) ^^| ^^[Info](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/) ^^| ^^[Opt-out](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/comments/o8wk1r/blacklist_ix/) ^^| ^^[GitHub](https://github.com/ghnr/sneakpeekbot)
I should mention your daughter has a right to an education. Physical harm and ongoing intimidation is a federal obstacle that the district has an obligation to act on. At this point, we just don't know if your teacher is a first-year who has lost control of the classroom, a longterm sub, or something else. We don't know if the principal is unaware bc the teacher is covering their ass, or if the principal is aware and negligent. (I have coached in a school where I observed some of the most traumatic classroom environments I have ever seen, the principal was aware and just hanging out in the front office.) Are there any discrimination / title 6 concerns relating to your daughter's experiences?
Whatever meetings you take, be sure to take a second person with you. Your emotions will be heightened (of course and rightfully so) and you want to be sure you are hearing all that is being communicated and that you are asking questions and have a plan before you leave. If I may suggest also keep a log of communications with the school. Best of luck and I am sorry for your daughter, how terrible for her to have to go through this.
I’m kindergarten teacher and this was not handled properly. When your child was punched in the eyes she should have been taken to the nurse where it was documented and then the nurse should have called you and told you what happened. That child should have been written up regardless of his mental state. Now for this one the teacher should have called you personally about what happens and the child should have been written up. His parents should have been called as well. If this child is has been aggressive all school year I hope it has been documented so they can be evaluated. Hopefully they end up in a behavioral unit where they can serviced and helped. We have these on our campus for lower elementary and upper elementary. Mind you in kindergarten there is not much that can be done in the way of discipline. They can’t be suspended until the 3 rd grade at least at my district. The most they get is lunch detention and will not be allowed to join in on the fun activities at the end of the year.
Thats weird Here they are sent home and suspended if they physically injure anyone else. Especially if its another student. Unless they have an iep.... they cannot be expelled though so they just keep increasing the suspension time i think 1 day then 3 days then 5.
Request a meeting with administration immediately. Also if the school has a fb page start there too who knows how long this has been happening and if there are other parents are wondering the same. In my district threats like that are an automatic one week suspension regardless of the the grade.
No Fing way would my kid ever step foot in that school again. I would sell my kidney to put my kid in a different school before I would put up with this type of nachalance about violence from 6 year old kids.
My two cents here: definitely talk to the principal and also write a letter detailing the incidents and the impact this is having. They should take action immediately.
In addition to the principal send it to the district offices to the superintendent.
Yes! And document everything.
Call the news if nothing happens with the principal !
OT! OT! OT;
Document everything first and foremost. Take pictures of your daughter's injuries, and write down everything she says happened. Send an email to the teacher demanding an explanation of what occurred and what was witnessed. Keep everything in writing, do not answer a phone call. Because your daughter was physically assaulted by a student, you need to file a police report immediately. File a separate report for the threats. Actually, the school was under the obligation to call the police when she was assaulted and also when she was threatened Hire an attorney and file a formal complaint against the teacher and the school with the board of education and CPS
Ask the principal to do a threat assessment. The kids may need different classrooms, or mediation.
Stop sending her there. It is not safe and your duty as a parent is to protect her. You need to find a different school for her or homeschool her before something worse happens.
I would tell the police. Idc how old he is, that a threat to someone’s life
I live in NJ. You can file a HIB report in my state. You can even file it with the police if you feel the district won’t take this serious. You may want to look up the Harassment, intimidation, bullying policy for your state.
Thank you, I will! She loves her school and we live in a very small town so it’s either public school or homeschooling.
Hope everything works out. I get it’s kindergarten but the school still needs to take this very serious.
I’d schedule a meeting with the principal so that he/she is aware that the teacher is not informing you of these things. If the principal doesn’t handle it in accordance with the schools anti-bullying policy (a requirement in my state), I’d contact the police.
Where is the teacher when this happened?
Pull her now, ask questions later. That is an unsafe environment, and if she were mine, she would have been gone after the getting punched in the eyes thing.
Have her moved to a different class
I have a nephew that does the threatening and the school and his parents don't take it seriously. Please raise hell for your daughter. You are her best advocate and you'll teach her to stand up for herself in the process.
Same. And when you do try to correct the behavior she gets mad at you and tells you it’s her child to raise. Ok, enjoy your little serial killer 🙄
Yeah me and my brother are barely speaking due to this. I hate that you're going thru it too, but it is nice to hear that we aren't the only family experiencing it. I feel so helpless.
Pull your child out of this school!
This may come across harsh but you are her parent not the school. Be sending her back you are telling the school you are okay with the behavior and you are telling your daughter that you condone her being treated this way which will fully affect her sharing future abuse. What’s the point in telling you anything if you don’t put a stop to it. You can’t make that child stop but you can remove your child from an unsafe environment. This is your kid, nothing else should come above her needs. This is not normal behavior but schools rarely suspend students anymore so the buck will have to stop with you. Take the meetings, contact CPS but you will most likely have to transfer her to another school or finish the year at home. I am sorry your daughter is experiencing so much trauma in a place that should be safe.
I would pull my kid out of that school immediately.
As a former teacher, I know all too well how Admin and even some teachers will try to take care of things within the school or classroom. This should go directly to the police. Your child was assaulted. schools are ill-prepared to handle these situations that go well beyond classroom management. You have every right to demand that the child who hit yours be moved to a different classroom at bare minimum, even this late in the school year. You also have every right to get an order of protection through the police and courts for your child. Finally, this needs to be brought to the attention of the Superintendant of the district because that teacher has a duty to report this incident to you and the principal.
I hope you’re joking about this. What the hell…
I would not send my kid back to that school. It’s probably an empty threat but the risk that it’s not isn’t worth it.
Your daughter is not safe, if there’s another teacher she can switch to, if and only if the principal takes you seriously
Whoa I’d go nuclear. Not sure if I’d want my kid somewhere they clearly aren’t safe. Does the state know about this? The board? Raise hell.
Idk, they play games like "poison" where you run around like playing tag, but if you get tagged, you "die" The video game Among US is about finding the "Imposter" and putting him out the air lock of the space station and the imposter us basically a serial killer, but it's cartoonish, and basically a Clue game in space.
sounds like child endangerment to me. press charges if they don't get right
1. Start google sheets with list of events thus far. Update with all information as time goes on. 2. Meet w principal. You need to be clear about what has happened, and come up with a list of things that you do not know. Ask direct questions to understand the parts you don't know and ensure that you get direct answers. For example, "my child was punched in bithbeyes two weeks ago, and i recieved a handwritten note. Were you aware this happened? (Answer.) Did you have a conversation with the teacher about this incident, and what was that conversation? (Answer.) Is this the school policy for reporting harm? (Answer.) Is this the district policy for physical harm against a student? (Answer.)" Take notes so you don't have to remember anything. If the principal implies that they cannot discuss the specifics of any incidents (for example, the conversation they had with the teacher), clarify if they cannot discuss it because of a formal hr process. If so, that makes sense. If there isnt, then clarify why they cannot discuss the content of that conversation. Do not let them conflate student privacy with other information you should have a right to know. 3. Follow up in this meeting with a summary email of your understanding. Include details to the questions above, as well as ongoing concerns. In the end, you are either asking the principal what they are doing to ensure your child's safety or you are demanding a particular resolution. Cc the person who your principal reports to. In my district, these are called IAS (instructional asst superintendents). At that point, you will be summarizing what has happened to the child, what the teacher did, what the principal knew, and how the principal has handled it. We can help you write it, if necessary. 4. Anticipate that the meeting with not be satisfactory, as the principal has conflicting self interests. Yes, they want the school to be safe, but more importantly, they dont want anyone outside the school to know it is not. Be prepared to file a complaint against at the central office. 5. Imo, the local news is NOT the next step. You will have a process at the central office regarding the hr complaint. Remember that the district hr department is not a neutral group. They are there to protect the district. Reach out to any local parent advocate groups to assist with that. If you go to the news before doing a complaint, the comms person for the district will simply say on camera that they had no idea this was happening and they will initiate communication with you, which will not have the force of hr behind it. 6. If the outcome of the hr complaint is unsatisfactory, then you go to the local news. Bc you have done things in this order, you will be airing out the teacher, the principal and the central office. If hr knows this, they will try to avoid it at all costs.
Take the note from the school & go to the police station & file a report then contact the state education department & file a formal complaint against the principal & teachers involved.
You need to call the police! FFF that teacher!
If you can, bring another parent in with you. Administration can gaslight one parent, but not 2.
NOT ACCEPTABLE!!!!!!! The line has been crossed! Not only has your daughter been violated, but the school is negligent.
Hospital to document the injuries. Police report. In that order. Don’t rely on school admin to resolve that horrific situation properly. They will be forced to resolve it properly if this is documented. Don’t wait.
Ok, this happened to my daughter this year in Kindergarten as well. After I picked her up crying saying she was hiding in the bathroom because her friends told her to hide from the boy that wanted to kill her, we immediately made an appointment with the principal. The child in question was moved to a different class and there was a “no contact contract” signed between both my daughter and the other child. He was put into a separate lunch area from my daughter and my daughter was instructed to inform a security guard or teacher if she was approached by this other kid at any point in time. This all wrapped up at the end of the first semester and she hasn’t had any complaints about him in a few months.
Nothing will happen. My guess is that you will be told that the behavior is considered a manifestation of his disability!
Damn in kindergarten??? These new kid’s different
Please for the love of God don't let your daughter go back to that school until something is done...maybe even just period. From the look of it your daughter is in danger and the school will do NOTHING about it until it's too late.
Make sure you send an email to document. Document everything!
Wow this infuriates me. Kindergartners don’t have phones, which means their teachers HAVE to be their advocates. I’m sure your daughter wanted nothing more than to call her mom when she got punched and she had to wait??? Not to mention this new incident…I’m sorry, but I’d go full mama bear Karen on these people. First of all, this is not your fault, you couldn’t have foreseen this, when you drop your kids at school you should be able to trust that you’ll be the first to know if something happens with your child. However, I would definitely take this opportunity to have a talk with your daughter about advocating for herself. That you will ALWAYS be there for her, but as she gets older, there will unfortunately be times that she’s gonna need to speak up even when she’s scared. Just like we tell our kids to kick and scream and bite if a stranger ever picks them up, we need to tell them that if they are not comfortable or feeling hear, then we need to make ourselves heard. If she wants to call mom, she gets to call mom, period. If she has to “break rules” and tell her adult teachers no I need to speak with my mom I am not feeling safe/okay/whatever. She can cry she can yell she can do whatever she needs to do to get mom on the phone, always, no matter where she is or who she’s with. (Obvs not if like she just misses you or wants to say hi lol but in situations like these) Otherwise, I probably wouldn’t trust the school anymore, but I do understand changing schools is just not always possible, in that case I’d just be up their ass honestly. It’s scary enough sending kids to school these days, parents should at the very least be able to sleep peacefully knowing the staff and teachers at school are lookin out for your kid, and being proactive about communication should anything happen. Best of luck, so sorry this is happening 🫶
If you are in the US make a police report (yes literally), and call the state board of education and notify them that the school has not done anything. Then to top it off, file a complaint against the teacher as well. My daughter was physically assaulted on the bus by a 5th grader on her first day of school years ago. The school ALSO didnt want to do anything until we said we were filing a police report and wanting this child charged with assault. Suddenly WE were taking it too far. Nah my 5 year old was YANKED off her bus seat hitting her head on the floor HARD and y'all just gonna move this kids seat and NOT do anything??!? Nah enjoy the psycho mom. ☺️ They tried retaliating against my family for YEARS until the state literally stepped in and proved id have a VERY viable lawsuit against the school and suddenly my kid was no longer the "problem child".
Go to urgent care to get documentation for her black eye if you can’t reach her pediatrician
Make noise...lots of and lots of noise... this is happening quietly all across the country even in daycares and learning centers and people dont hold kids and parents accountable tell whoever will listen...police, school board, news...this us how kids who go on to hurt or kill get started