Hello,
Your post has been removed as this is not mildly infuriating. I already saw you got recommended to go there. Please do.
Please consider posting to r/extremelyinfuriating instead.
Definitely, but what about the elephant in the room here? Predatory sales techniques are absolutely rampant on phone games right now, and they seem to overwhelmingly target children.
Why does the public find these acceptable? Even Southpark did an episode on freemium games, how they are addictive, and how they are designed to appeal to children. They did that episode like 10 years ago. It has gotten so much worse since then.
Update: To all of you who think this is some attempt to displace blame, oh please. It can be both things. Should the kid steal? Obviously no. Should these predatory apps be allowed? I don't think so. But what did you all make of every charge being to that same game and ramping up in frequency like that? Kid went through all the effort to steal a credit card and then only used it for this game. That seemed okay?
The child stole the safe key, found the safe and then stole a credit card from said safe to use for these games
No (mobile) games will tell a kid to break in a safe and steal a credit card to then use on their game.
I'm sorry man, I agree that the predatory sales techniques are a problem but this kid knew exactly what he was doing and already went a few steps too far. This is a mental/upbringing issue more than a predatory sales issue.
Ikr, millions of kids are exposed to that stuff but millions of kids don’t do this.
But I get it, everything is monocausal and that cause is specifically whatever I care about at the present moment
I think the point in fact is that this isn't monocausal -- it's easy to think the sole cause is "shitty thief kid", but there are multiple factors at play, including predatory gaming practices.
People like that are ridiculous even if their point is technically true. He broke into a damn safe ffs. "It's the games' fault! He didn't steal books! 🤓"
Unfortunately a lot of these games make it near impossible to continue after a certain point without coughing up money. It's *technically* possible, but prohibitively time consuming as the game trickles out a limited few needed resources per day/week.
Some people can have a couple drinks and go to bed at a reasonable time. Some people let alcohol ruin their lives. There's no logic when it comes to addiction and some people are more susceptible than others. We're allowing companies to do this to children.
Lmfao! I meant the actual phrase "actual factual" - I keep hearing it more and more and Im just wondering what popularized it.
That's a funny and completely understandable misinterpretation though
What's worse - a sales model, or a parent who has no idea what their child is doing with a supremely powerful tool that can allow them to get into shit tons of troubling situations?
There's definitively a discussion to have about that, but I don't think it should eclipse the responsibility of the child themselves, and that because of a clear lacking in their behaviour that ought to be fixed.
I work in videogames.
I'm an artist, so I'm not involved in the money side of things in any form.
Either way, in my last company (one of the pretty big ones) I happened to be in the same room as the Monetization Director.
He said (and I quote almost verbatim): "when I see a little innocent boy on the street my first thought is 'how can I get all that boy's money and that of his family's"?
Chuckles and smiles of approval, the only one to show disgust seemed to be me.
Anyway, that's the spirit, if anyone had any doubt.
I'd take his bike and console off him in the meantime just for him doing it. There *has* to be repercussions, not just you getting your money back. I don't think it's too harsh that there's consequences even if you get your money back from the bank. Good luck x.
Honestly, you’ve got plenty of time for chargebacks. Tell them card was stolen and those charges weren’t authorized. His account/s will get banned 100%, probably stop any future spending
so you’re gonna make the kid work it off regardless right? And if I were his parents I would definitely confiscate all of his electronics, and possibly even have his account taken down for the game he was spending your money on. That would teach the little fuck
As part of the fraud investigation, the game account has been taken down. Since the charges were all within the last thirty days, they may get reversed. I can recoup the $1,400 in a week, but according to my sister and his dad, he's gonna work it off regardless of whether or not the charges get reversed.
*edited for spelling*
I’m sorry this happened, but hopefully your sister follows through and he learns something now before he gets himself in serious trouble when he’s older
I had my attorney draft an amortization plan for him, signed with consent of the parents.
It's a formality, just to drive the point home.
He's a bright kid, top of his class, but he definitely statted intelligence over wisdom.
In the grand scheme of things, it's just money to me, and not worth destroying the relationship I have with my family.
It's the *principle* of the matter. Theft is wrong. He's going to learn that lesson NOW, and not when he's old enough to get arrested.
*edited for spelling*
Seems like you are trying to teach the value of money, with the common use of credit and debit cards now, kids probably do not associate money as a real physical thing that is anything but a number. More often than not, a kid’s allowance isn’t directly tied to chores in a noticeable way so they just expect to get the money.
She needs to learn that this is what happens and she’ll enable him all the way to jail. I’m glad (for your sake too) for his sake that he’s getting consequences for his actions. Maybe he’ll learn and won’t find himself in a jail cell.
Kinda understated here, but that kid is extremely lucky he has you and your sister in his family. He has a chance to learn and be better from here. Hopefully he'll take to it.
25 years ago I was doing IT stuff at a bacon factory. The President’s son was 14/15 and got expelled from school for the rest of the year for breaking into the school’s computer system and changing people’s grades for a modest fee.
My boss was his aunt. She and her bro asked me if I’d take him on as an intern for the rest of the school year and all summer, to teach him that you can do more-productive things with computers.
Anyway he runs the app-making group at one of the USA’s largest newspapers. Really turned it around.
It looks very clear he has excellent parents and a role model in you and that he's done this of his own accord for thrills perhaps. He's being given a second chance to learn and I hope that it works out well
That explains why the charges are so low.
My first thought was "this looks like small video games microtransaction purchase history of a pre-teen." I was expecting massive charges to support the drug habits of a teenager.
This is the correct mindset. While the money is moderately important, the truly important part is that this kid learns this lesson before he pulls this crap as an adult.
Good for you and his parents for being proactive with nipping this in the bud.
I hope he learns from this and everyone can grow closer because of it.
Well said!
My son, 6yo at the time, stole a pack of gum from the grocery checkout while I was preoccupied with unloading the cart. The next morning I dropped the other kids off at school and then took him back to the store. The manager came over, my son was bawling, he paid for and gave back the gum. Moreover, he lost his tablet for a month and was my dedicated goffer the entire time.
He's 15 now and still looks back on that moment as a learning opportunity. No other incidents since, taking AP classes in high school, and looking into colleges now.
Granted, it's not like numerous CC charges, but you are turning this into an excellent life experience. One they'll never forget.
Great work!!
My sister and BIL have him on the waiting list for a pediatric psychologist, he's displayed some signs of narcissistic personality disorder, and borderline sociopathy.
Your other comments really drive home that you really love and care for your family- I’m confident that if he does get diagnosed with those conditions- you won’t villainize him just for the way he was born.
I spent enough time being villainized by adults for having the 'tism and cyclothymia.
I won't subject a child to the same treatment.
Regardless of his (physically) harmless behavior.
Usually, on a chargeback situation, gaming companies like Sony, Google, etc will lock the account in question.
This really sucks, and I'm glad you caught it.
I'm just so glad that this wasn't another incident where the charges were in the 10s of thousands, or that the parents would rather act like the kid is an angel and you should just suck it up.
I hope this is gets fixed for you quickly as I know from personal experience that any Credit debt is a desolate pit, none too easy to escape. As well, I hope this is a strong lesson in discipline and responsibility for the kid.
When i was ten i kept stealing my parents credit cards to sign up for the free month of aol. I was dumfounded that I couldn’t just keep canceling after 29 days.
Fucking February wins every time.
I did something similar as a kid albeit way less money but it was on a game. I’m 30 now and still fully regret it to this day. At the time I knew it wasn’t right but didn’t understand the gravity. Also it was my own parents and yeah.. I was beyond stupid.
Was at my dad’s friend’s place one time as a kid, noticed a $20 bill laying on the counter and with literally zero thought processes involved, I just pocketed that $20.
And because I had money now, I wanted to spend it as quickly as possible, on Pokemon cards. $20 was enough to buy those big packs of cards instead of just the smaller packs.
But! I had to somehow explain to my dad how I just randomly had $20 all of a sudden.
That weekend my grandma had given me a new jacket so I just pretended that I found the $20 in the pocket when I tried it on! Weird, right?!
My dad obviously knew I was lying but couldn’t prove I had stolen the money from anywhere, even after calling his mom to verify she hadn’t gifted me $20 with the jacket.
I did end up getting the cards, if I remember correctly. But I’ve always felt guilty about it.
I did a similar thing it was like $150 in charges and like I felt like I had just put the ultimate burden onto my parents doing it and I was so young making money wasn’t easy. Obviously learnt my lesson and my dad made me pay it back by working for him around the house
My brother stole my parents' credit card and bought $300 of V-Bucks. I was playing Call of Duty: Cold War when it was in beta and my dad came flying in, pissed off at me saying "What did you just fucking buy!?" I was confused as hell and asked what's wrong, because I bought a $60 game. He then asked me if it was $300, which I showed him it wasn't. The next day me and my brother caught the little shit red handed as his account had a ridiculous amount of V-Bucks. Fun stuff
My kid did this too for some mobile game when he was like 7. I did it too except I was a teenager (although only like $50). Still, mine was way worse because you'd think I'd know better. I would never steal now. Kids and teens brains aren't fully developed and don't make the best decisions sometimes.
It's an opaque skinner box made by a branch of a gambling conglomerate. The answer to "how do you spend so much in x game" from your Match, Zynga Activision-Blizzard-King games is almost always "much too easily".
I stopped playing all Zynga games when it became obvious that in order to advance, you were forced to purchase credits in order to advance. Unless you wanted to spend hours and days earning enough credits in game to get that one thing you needed to complete a building.
Most of their games are aimed at kids. And kids have no real understanding of how much it costs.
When I get flown out for work, I'm usually off-grid for a month or so at a time. Maybe he only intended to spend $10 or $20, but games like that are good at making in-game currency an addiction.
Agreed maybe look into him having adhd or other conditions that makes it easier to be susceptible to the scummy business practices theses companies have.
It could help prevent this from happening again and how to better manage it
I got a chuckle out of that, but if it hits 90° here, he's not mowing lawns.
Due to our northern latitude, 90° feels more like 110°. $1,400 isn't worth his actual health.
I'm sorry you had to deal with that, I chose to start mowing lawns as a kid, and now I'm the general manager of one of the biggest lawn maintenance companies in my state.
I want to *checks notes* "stop generational trauma" by not forcing him to work in extreme conditions.
Genuinely props to you, I know more adults than not who would just vent all their anger and frustration on the child and parents with little regard for their well-being. I know people who would've permanently excommunicated their family member over this.
Sorry if I wasn't clear, I have an aversion to discussing the ages of minors in my family (or children of friends) on the net. I've seen what the weapon iced autism of Reddit and 4chan can do.
Normally I’m a big advocate of putting things where kids couldn’t possibly grab them, but if your shit was literally *in a safe* then this kid sucks, dude.
I remember when my brother was like 10 he had my dads credit card on his PlayStation. He bought like $600 worth of vbucks in like a week. My mom convinced him it was fraud and its been 6 years. Still has no clue.
I just seen the first picture, skipped to next picture and it.just.kept.going.
Damn that sucks, luckly it won't affect you credit but if it does then I would make even bigger consequences.
and good resolution tactics so far.
I've got fraud protection, so I should be good. Even if it dings my score, I probably won't even notice it before it falls off my credit report.
House is paid off, cars are paid off, $1,400 isn't going to put me on the street.
Read the comments, OP you doing the right thing for his future. If didn't rectify his behaviour, who know what he going to do with his high intelligence,heck he might just do a real heist following GTA game.
All in all I do hope you can get yr money back since it's credit card
Too late. I also told them that I was in a remote village, accessible only by plane or boat, and that nobody has permission to use the card. I have a police reference number for the theft.
As someone who worked with chargebacks before, I can tell you that they will use the fact that its your family against you, as in their eyes fraud =/= missplacing your credit card inti the hands of your nephew, I know that isn't what happened, but they see it as black and white sadly.
When he gets his first job, he can pay you back then if you’re unable to do the chargeback. Make this into a years-long thing that he will *never* forget. Obviously don’t charge him interest or anything, but this would be a good lesson for him. Getting a job once he is old enough will get him his own money, teach him some responsibility.
And by not being able to use his money at first due to having to pay you back, it drives home even more how badly he fucked up. “See how hard you’re working every day for all this money? But now you have to give it to me, it’s mine now. This is exactly what you did to me. I worked hard for my money, and you stole it.”
Thanl you.
My parents did their best to raise us (two little sister and myself)
We were never rich, or even really middle-class, but we never wanted for the essentials and we all understand the value of money. None of us spend money for anything that isn't needed, with the exception of special occasions (holidays, birthdays) or the occasional splurge.
In the shitter. He’s gotten off so easy. Kids can have sticky fingers, but it’s not like OP left their card out. Kid had to move with intention here start to finish. There were numerous points at which the kid’s common sense could’ve (should’ve) kicked in. No way this isn’t an issue later down the line.
honestly, even if Capital One recoup the charges, sell his stuff. fucking deserves it and he won't learn otherwise (a sit down won't teach him shit if he's willing to do something like this).
I had kleptomania when I was a kid and I mostly stole money. I also statted for intelligence and not wisdom so I kinda know how it feels.
One thing that did help scare me straight is that my sister took me to the local precint and basically threatened to have me jailed for theft. It worked on me because I was afraid of having any sort of official criminal history because of how it would look like in background checks for getting jobs. Yes, I was a teen, but back then I already knew how brutal employers in my country when it comes to criminal history no matter how minor. One of the requirements, even now, when job searching is a special clearance from the equivalent of our FBI that states that you have no outstanding warrants, etc.
Also, he may be old enough to start earning pocket money. He had no issue spending your money because it is not his money and the act of money being deducted from you does not affect him in any concrete way.
Him having his own prepaid card that he loads with his own money that he earned on his own may help him realize that, hey, he now has no money because he kept spending it all on microtransactions and he starts feeling the pinch and maybe a little of how you felt seeing all those charges to your card.
Man. I understand the appeal, but damn. I’m glad to read the other comments that you’re handling it very well with his working it off, etc…. Well done uncle.
I'm really disappointed .. the kid's spending on a game under Zynga. Anyways, there's mostly window time to refund these online charges, especially banks and google play knows these incidents occur more often than non-gamers think it does.
"You were unaware when these charges were made", "The charges were made in a new device that you don't normally use", "The charges are from an app you don't normally use", these are some points they reason out when refunding unknown charges from online game apps.
Most likely you have a high chance on refund, google play will reverse these charges and disable the kid's account if they don't pay it back.
Hilarious that there is so many small transaction purchases except those are the worst in value when buying into games, actually would of had less losses if he had just bought like 3 packs of 100 LOL.
All points aside about the cost tho, this is pretty crazy to see and why extra verification for purchasing, on mobile apps, really needs to be implemented. It's too easy for people to just buy crap on phone games, wild predatory purchasing power.
I work in fraud Investigations for a bank. Since you reported that the card was locked up and the kid actually stole it I would say it's highly likely they'll credit the charges. You wouldn't believe how often this happens. I've seen accounts with THOUSANDS of dollars being charged to fortnight. And since the parent added the card to the game console for 1 charge that was allowed they were liable for ALL of them because it's their responsibility to either remove the card or password lock it on the account.
That’s messed up. More than mildly infuriating lol.
Glad there seems to be a repercussions for his actions, so many would say it’s just a kid and let them go off with a slap on the wrist. Make the repercussions hurt but don’t fully suffocate him.
I’m more terrified that he at the age that is capable of doing this but hasn’t been taught of the consequence to actually go through with it. I’m glad he is made to pay every single cent back. He better be grounded outside of working as well. Including during summer vacation. Like how is this something you need to teach? Common sense just isn’t there. I’m more worried if he knew the risk but the thrill is what he is after. Was he apologetic at least OP?
Oh man... This reminds me of the time my little brother bought $250 worth of Team Fortress items and then promptly deleted them when I found out. Steam did not like that at all and I had a negative balance for about two years. I was beyond pissed.
I don’t understand the security system in your country,
In my country there is a limit to purchase, if crossed, it will ask for OTP from me. If not provided and the card kept in usage it will be blocked…
Debt or credit cards, if anyone tried to steal it physically or electronically it won’t work for them, it is almost useless nowadays to steal a one.
Jesus Christ, I did a similar thing when I was a little kid but it was “only” 300, how do you even spend 1 400 in a month, that’s insane. Ik, microtransactions are predatory nowadays but jfc that bad?!
You should be aware that if someone uses your credit card without permission, the maximum you can be liable for is $50 under the Fair Credit Billing Act. They cannot make you pay for this, and any suggestion they make that they can is simply an attempt to fool you into paying for it so they don't have to eat the charges.
I vote take the console and bike away anyway. Hide them. Tell him you already sold them but he still owes you the money anyway.
Once it's paid off, ask if he has learned anything from doing that. Depending on his answer, either give them back, or then actually sell them.
He should have all of that stuff taken away regardless of whether or not the charges are reversed. What lesson is being taught? That it's all good once the bank takes care of it?
Wonder how and why the kid thought it was a okay thing to literally steal? What are his parents doing to have not noticed him physically entering ur safe for one thing?
How would the kid even know about the safe? How did he know there was a key for it in his mom's purse?
He must have been looking for anything he could steal. I doubt it occurred to some kid that adults sometimes keep back-up credit cards in a safe. It's more like he set out to steal, found something to steal, and then figured out a way to use it.
Police won’t charge? That makes no sense. It was stolen. I get some people thinking it’s maybe excessive due to age but it is not like you left it out in the child’s presence. The kid is never going to learn until real consequences hit him. $1400 is an escalation.
You left your card out and a kid used it, that is a mistake on kids part. Deliberately going into a locked location to take it? That is no mistake. Every time i have seen this it just escalates and doesn’t end well because it has already passed the point of a phase.
You should also distance yourself from the kid, not completely leave his life though, it sounds like he needs a positive presence in his life like you. You need to cut off the gifts and everything else until you are sure he changes.
The subdivision they live in doesn't have coverage by any lawn care company, and there's lots of retired folks. He did it last summer for spending money and was pulling in $150 a day.
Per my sister and BIL, even IF the charges are reversed, he's going to "work it off." No allowance, no video games, and most (if not all) the money he makes this summer mowing grass and scooping poop is going to be "confiscated" into a high-yield savings account, to be released to him when he's 18.
I eventually got in trouble doing as a kid when the little things I bought noticed.
I didn’t steal the card, I just had the number, expiration date, and cvv memorized. It was just a pizza here or there. I’m not a supercriminal like this brat.
How old is he? He must be quite young if police aren’t willing to get involved? This sucks extremely and I’m so sorry. But I’m glad you sister and her husband are doing something about it. Also what is this charge? Is this like phone games? Or porn? Or what? I just don’t know what would ring up like that.
Hello, Your post has been removed as this is not mildly infuriating. I already saw you got recommended to go there. Please do. Please consider posting to r/extremelyinfuriating instead.
What a little piece of shit
Sums it up nicely, i think.
I wonder what age this little shit is?
Definitely, but what about the elephant in the room here? Predatory sales techniques are absolutely rampant on phone games right now, and they seem to overwhelmingly target children. Why does the public find these acceptable? Even Southpark did an episode on freemium games, how they are addictive, and how they are designed to appeal to children. They did that episode like 10 years ago. It has gotten so much worse since then. Update: To all of you who think this is some attempt to displace blame, oh please. It can be both things. Should the kid steal? Obviously no. Should these predatory apps be allowed? I don't think so. But what did you all make of every charge being to that same game and ramping up in frequency like that? Kid went through all the effort to steal a credit card and then only used it for this game. That seemed okay?
The child stole the safe key, found the safe and then stole a credit card from said safe to use for these games No (mobile) games will tell a kid to break in a safe and steal a credit card to then use on their game. I'm sorry man, I agree that the predatory sales techniques are a problem but this kid knew exactly what he was doing and already went a few steps too far. This is a mental/upbringing issue more than a predatory sales issue.
Ikr, millions of kids are exposed to that stuff but millions of kids don’t do this. But I get it, everything is monocausal and that cause is specifically whatever I care about at the present moment
I think the point in fact is that this isn't monocausal -- it's easy to think the sole cause is "shitty thief kid", but there are multiple factors at play, including predatory gaming practices.
People like that are ridiculous even if their point is technically true. He broke into a damn safe ffs. "It's the games' fault! He didn't steal books! 🤓"
It’s these lame ass kids that have to pay to get better at video games. Grind it out like a real gamer.
Unfortunately a lot of these games make it near impossible to continue after a certain point without coughing up money. It's *technically* possible, but prohibitively time consuming as the game trickles out a limited few needed resources per day/week.
Some people can have a couple drinks and go to bed at a reasonable time. Some people let alcohol ruin their lives. There's no logic when it comes to addiction and some people are more susceptible than others. We're allowing companies to do this to children.
I wonder how much predatory sales would have taken place if not for the, yknow, actual theft.
Hey now don't be logical here we're on Reddit where people only want to be angry
I am here Becuse I am horny
credit card fraud kink?
Yeah under many other
securities fraud gets me all hot under the collar tbh
I mean you’re right but there’s actual factual theft involved. Both can be true!
>actual factual lmfao where did you hear this
From me, the OP. He stole a safe key and stole a card from the safe. Actual, factual theft.
Lmfao! I meant the actual phrase "actual factual" - I keep hearing it more and more and Im just wondering what popularized it. That's a funny and completely understandable misinterpretation though
Predatory or not, it does not excuse stealing someone else's credit card. It would be a bit more understandable if he spent his parents' money.
Lmfao anything to avoid accountability
What's worse - a sales model, or a parent who has no idea what their child is doing with a supremely powerful tool that can allow them to get into shit tons of troubling situations?
I am henceforth referring to my credit cards as tools of supreme financial power.
the game telling the kid that he will die if he doesn't figure out where his aunt's credit card is:
the kid arguing to his parents that video games aren't real and have no effect on his brain:
Uncle*
There's definitively a discussion to have about that, but I don't think it should eclipse the responsibility of the child themselves, and that because of a clear lacking in their behaviour that ought to be fixed.
Normally, I'd agree with you. But the kid purposely stole a card and thousand+ dollars.
Maybe instead of constantly blaming other things, people should actually parent their children.
I work in videogames. I'm an artist, so I'm not involved in the money side of things in any form. Either way, in my last company (one of the pretty big ones) I happened to be in the same room as the Monetization Director. He said (and I quote almost verbatim): "when I see a little innocent boy on the street my first thought is 'how can I get all that boy's money and that of his family's"? Chuckles and smiles of approval, the only one to show disgust seemed to be me. Anyway, that's the spirit, if anyone had any doubt.
It's not the "public", it's corporations and lobbyists.
How about personal responsibility and keeping your children from being able to purchase these things
He literally had the cards locked in a safe lmao what
this is so far beyond mildly infuriating.
I couldn't find a more appropriate sub, this far exceeds wellthatsucks.
r/extremelyinfuriating
Thanks. I'll cross-post.
this guy infuriates
How so?
It's a meme conntected to the "thisguythisguys" subreddit
Ah. I'm pretty illiterate in Reddit-speak.
It would be best to keep it that way.
This guy thisguythisguythisguys
That’s just a common reddit joke. Oop linked a sub, so this guy {whatever the sub is about}
I'd take his bike and console off him in the meantime just for him doing it. There *has* to be repercussions, not just you getting your money back. I don't think it's too harsh that there's consequences even if you get your money back from the bank. Good luck x.
Agreed, threatening isn't going to accomplish anything. They will reverse the charges and he will go with no punishment?
There is a sub called "I am a total piece of shit", might fit.
Good on the parents to side with you unconditionally. I was fearing for the worst reading this.
Honestly, you’ve got plenty of time for chargebacks. Tell them card was stolen and those charges weren’t authorized. His account/s will get banned 100%, probably stop any future spending
Make sure you freeze your credit. There's no telling what else he's done that you haven't found out about yet.
so you’re gonna make the kid work it off regardless right? And if I were his parents I would definitely confiscate all of his electronics, and possibly even have his account taken down for the game he was spending your money on. That would teach the little fuck
As part of the fraud investigation, the game account has been taken down. Since the charges were all within the last thirty days, they may get reversed. I can recoup the $1,400 in a week, but according to my sister and his dad, he's gonna work it off regardless of whether or not the charges get reversed. *edited for spelling*
I’m sorry this happened, but hopefully your sister follows through and he learns something now before he gets himself in serious trouble when he’s older
I had my attorney draft an amortization plan for him, signed with consent of the parents. It's a formality, just to drive the point home. He's a bright kid, top of his class, but he definitely statted intelligence over wisdom.
Good for you for trying to make the best out of a shitty situation. Best of luck to all of you guys
In the grand scheme of things, it's just money to me, and not worth destroying the relationship I have with my family. It's the *principle* of the matter. Theft is wrong. He's going to learn that lesson NOW, and not when he's old enough to get arrested. *edited for spelling*
Seems like you are trying to teach the value of money, with the common use of credit and debit cards now, kids probably do not associate money as a real physical thing that is anything but a number. More often than not, a kid’s allowance isn’t directly tied to chores in a noticeable way so they just expect to get the money.
I learned that lesson young. His bio mom is a coddling enabler.
She needs to learn that this is what happens and she’ll enable him all the way to jail. I’m glad (for your sake too) for his sake that he’s getting consequences for his actions. Maybe he’ll learn and won’t find himself in a jail cell.
You're helping rebuild my faith in humanity, I thank you for that! :)
Doing what I can with the time I got.
Great life lesson.
Kinda understated here, but that kid is extremely lucky he has you and your sister in his family. He has a chance to learn and be better from here. Hopefully he'll take to it.
You’re GOATED lol
25 years ago I was doing IT stuff at a bacon factory. The President’s son was 14/15 and got expelled from school for the rest of the year for breaking into the school’s computer system and changing people’s grades for a modest fee. My boss was his aunt. She and her bro asked me if I’d take him on as an intern for the rest of the school year and all summer, to teach him that you can do more-productive things with computers. Anyway he runs the app-making group at one of the USA’s largest newspapers. Really turned it around.
It looks very clear he has excellent parents and a role model in you and that he's done this of his own accord for thrills perhaps. He's being given a second chance to learn and I hope that it works out well
And a fair and reasonable punishment. How old is he?
I won't disclose his actual age, but over 6 and under 12.
Prime age to learn a lesson like this. Money may have been a more abstract concept before he got caught.
That explains why the charges are so low. My first thought was "this looks like small video games microtransaction purchase history of a pre-teen." I was expecting massive charges to support the drug habits of a teenager.
10 years then
This is the correct mindset. While the money is moderately important, the truly important part is that this kid learns this lesson before he pulls this crap as an adult. Good for you and his parents for being proactive with nipping this in the bud. I hope he learns from this and everyone can grow closer because of it.
Well said! My son, 6yo at the time, stole a pack of gum from the grocery checkout while I was preoccupied with unloading the cart. The next morning I dropped the other kids off at school and then took him back to the store. The manager came over, my son was bawling, he paid for and gave back the gum. Moreover, he lost his tablet for a month and was my dedicated goffer the entire time. He's 15 now and still looks back on that moment as a learning opportunity. No other incidents since, taking AP classes in high school, and looking into colleges now. Granted, it's not like numerous CC charges, but you are turning this into an excellent life experience. One they'll never forget. Great work!!
It makes this more concerning if he is that smart imo.
My sister and BIL have him on the waiting list for a pediatric psychologist, he's displayed some signs of narcissistic personality disorder, and borderline sociopathy.
Your other comments really drive home that you really love and care for your family- I’m confident that if he does get diagnosed with those conditions- you won’t villainize him just for the way he was born.
I spent enough time being villainized by adults for having the 'tism and cyclothymia. I won't subject a child to the same treatment. Regardless of his (physically) harmless behavior.
>definitely statted intelligence over wisdom. Hands down the most polite way of saying "he's a genius but he's thick as shit" and I love it
That "intelligence over wisdom" is pretty much every teen. Not to suggest he shouldn't have to make amends. That will teach some wisdom.
If they follow through, good on them as parents. It’s the only reason to not call the cops.
Cops were involved, kind of. One of my friends is a state troopers, he explained very clearly what would have happened had the kid been 12 or older.
Usually, on a chargeback situation, gaming companies like Sony, Google, etc will lock the account in question. This really sucks, and I'm glad you caught it.
I'm just so glad that this wasn't another incident where the charges were in the 10s of thousands, or that the parents would rather act like the kid is an angel and you should just suck it up. I hope this is gets fixed for you quickly as I know from personal experience that any Credit debt is a desolate pit, none too easy to escape. As well, I hope this is a strong lesson in discipline and responsibility for the kid.
Sounds like you have a great sister.
Well....at least they aren't trying to shield him from the consequences of his actions. This could be going way worse than it already is.
When i was ten i kept stealing my parents credit cards to sign up for the free month of aol. I was dumfounded that I couldn’t just keep canceling after 29 days. Fucking February wins every time.
I used to steal quarters from my parents laundromat stash to buy candy at school. I learned my lesson when they dealt out the consequences.
How Capital One didn't even flag those transactions from the outset is pretty wild.
Mobile games are full of whales, spending thousands of dollars knowingly. Banks just don't bother unless you actually report it
That's on me, normally I lock the cards in case my place gets burglaries while I'm out of town for work.
I was going to suggest that. I leave for about a month at a time for work sometimes and lock whatever cards I don’t take with me because I’m paranoid
zynga? is it one of those shitty facebook or mobile games? what an atrocious waste of money even if it wasn’t stolen
Farmville 3, I believe.
I did something similar as a kid albeit way less money but it was on a game. I’m 30 now and still fully regret it to this day. At the time I knew it wasn’t right but didn’t understand the gravity. Also it was my own parents and yeah.. I was beyond stupid.
Was at my dad’s friend’s place one time as a kid, noticed a $20 bill laying on the counter and with literally zero thought processes involved, I just pocketed that $20. And because I had money now, I wanted to spend it as quickly as possible, on Pokemon cards. $20 was enough to buy those big packs of cards instead of just the smaller packs. But! I had to somehow explain to my dad how I just randomly had $20 all of a sudden. That weekend my grandma had given me a new jacket so I just pretended that I found the $20 in the pocket when I tried it on! Weird, right?! My dad obviously knew I was lying but couldn’t prove I had stolen the money from anywhere, even after calling his mom to verify she hadn’t gifted me $20 with the jacket. I did end up getting the cards, if I remember correctly. But I’ve always felt guilty about it.
I did a similar thing it was like $150 in charges and like I felt like I had just put the ultimate burden onto my parents doing it and I was so young making money wasn’t easy. Obviously learnt my lesson and my dad made me pay it back by working for him around the house
My brother stole my parents' credit card and bought $300 of V-Bucks. I was playing Call of Duty: Cold War when it was in beta and my dad came flying in, pissed off at me saying "What did you just fucking buy!?" I was confused as hell and asked what's wrong, because I bought a $60 game. He then asked me if it was $300, which I showed him it wasn't. The next day me and my brother caught the little shit red handed as his account had a ridiculous amount of V-Bucks. Fun stuff
My kid did this too for some mobile game when he was like 7. I did it too except I was a teenager (although only like $50). Still, mine was way worse because you'd think I'd know better. I would never steal now. Kids and teens brains aren't fully developed and don't make the best decisions sometimes.
Farmville *3?!* Why the fuck is there a *FARMVILLE 3*?!?!
Good question. The O.G Facebook version was fun back in the day. Good time killer.
what stuff did he bought if u dont mind sharing. really curious how someone can spend 1.4k on farmville lol
It's an opaque skinner box made by a branch of a gambling conglomerate. The answer to "how do you spend so much in x game" from your Match, Zynga Activision-Blizzard-King games is almost always "much too easily".
In-game currency.
ahh i see
wow, i can’t imagine ever wanting to spend $1400 on a single video game. he really needs to learn the value of money i guess
Thank you for doing maths for me.
This kid is so desperate for a fix he steals your credit card… if this kid ever goes to a casino when he’s older, he’s done, a complete write off.
I stopped playing all Zynga games when it became obvious that in order to advance, you were forced to purchase credits in order to advance. Unless you wanted to spend hours and days earning enough credits in game to get that one thing you needed to complete a building. Most of their games are aimed at kids. And kids have no real understanding of how much it costs.
wow that is ballsy did he not realize you’d notice eventually?
When I get flown out for work, I'm usually off-grid for a month or so at a time. Maybe he only intended to spend $10 or $20, but games like that are good at making in-game currency an addiction.
Agreed maybe look into him having adhd or other conditions that makes it easier to be susceptible to the scummy business practices theses companies have. It could help prevent this from happening again and how to better manage it
ADHD is likely, given how prevalent it is in the family bio mom and dad both have it to some degree.
What do you do?
It's a small kid of course it didnt think they'd realize.
How old is the felonious kid?
Under the minimum age in my state to be arrested for anything other than a Class A or Unclassified Felony. Theft 2 is a Class C.
Hopefully the kid changes direction after he mows his 200th yard for $20 when it's 90 degrees out.
I got a chuckle out of that, but if it hits 90° here, he's not mowing lawns. Due to our northern latitude, 90° feels more like 110°. $1,400 isn't worth his actual health.
I wish my folks would have had that much compassion.
I'm sorry you had to deal with that, I chose to start mowing lawns as a kid, and now I'm the general manager of one of the biggest lawn maintenance companies in my state. I want to *checks notes* "stop generational trauma" by not forcing him to work in extreme conditions.
I had planned on starting a lawn biz before i got skin cancer. My health comes first.
Eyyy, 3x BCC removals here. They don't make a sunscreen in SPF 3,000 for my pale self.
I had squamous, not as bad as melanoma, but worse than basal. I've also got horrible allergies to grasses, maple and elm.
Oof. Yeah, none of the nasty ones here (yet).
Genuinely props to you, I know more adults than not who would just vent all their anger and frustration on the child and parents with little regard for their well-being. I know people who would've permanently excommunicated their family member over this.
For those who don’t understand a word of that: hold old is he?
I'm not disclosing his actual age, but under 12.
Thanks, that provides a much clearer perspective on how we should judge his actions.
Sorry if I wasn't clear, I have an aversion to discussing the ages of minors in my family (or children of friends) on the net. I've seen what the weapon iced autism of Reddit and 4chan can do.
"due to his age, police won't charge" usually with larger crimes like this, the person can still be charged. unless he's like 8 or something
In my state, the police will only charge a minor under 12 for Class A or Unclassified felonies. Theft 2 ($1,000-2,500) is a Class C.
ah, didn't realize he was under 12. I was thinking teenager
Normally I’m a big advocate of putting things where kids couldn’t possibly grab them, but if your shit was literally *in a safe* then this kid sucks, dude.
I remember when my brother was like 10 he had my dads credit card on his PlayStation. He bought like $600 worth of vbucks in like a week. My mom convinced him it was fraud and its been 6 years. Still has no clue.
I just seen the first picture, skipped to next picture and it.just.kept.going. Damn that sucks, luckly it won't affect you credit but if it does then I would make even bigger consequences. and good resolution tactics so far.
I've got fraud protection, so I should be good. Even if it dings my score, I probably won't even notice it before it falls off my credit report. House is paid off, cars are paid off, $1,400 isn't going to put me on the street.
I'm glad the parents are on your side. Way too many times do I see parents immediately take their children's side regardless of evidence.
Read the comments, OP you doing the right thing for his future. If didn't rectify his behaviour, who know what he going to do with his high intelligence,heck he might just do a real heist following GTA game. All in all I do hope you can get yr money back since it's credit card
I would not tell your credit card company you know who it is. If you tell them it was your nephew your claim will be denied.
Too late. I also told them that I was in a remote village, accessible only by plane or boat, and that nobody has permission to use the card. I have a police reference number for the theft.
As someone who worked with chargebacks before, I can tell you that they will use the fact that its your family against you, as in their eyes fraud =/= missplacing your credit card inti the hands of your nephew, I know that isn't what happened, but they see it as black and white sadly.
Oh well. I guess he's cutting grass all summer.
When he gets his first job, he can pay you back then if you’re unable to do the chargeback. Make this into a years-long thing that he will *never* forget. Obviously don’t charge him interest or anything, but this would be a good lesson for him. Getting a job once he is old enough will get him his own money, teach him some responsibility. And by not being able to use his money at first due to having to pay you back, it drives home even more how badly he fucked up. “See how hard you’re working every day for all this money? But now you have to give it to me, it’s mine now. This is exactly what you did to me. I worked hard for my money, and you stole it.”
OP your comments here give me hope for a future in this world. You sound like a really awesome person.
Thanl you. My parents did their best to raise us (two little sister and myself) We were never rich, or even really middle-class, but we never wanted for the essentials and we all understand the value of money. None of us spend money for anything that isn't needed, with the exception of special occasions (holidays, birthdays) or the occasional splurge.
Why taking back the console only if the credit card company reverses the charges????? Where is the lesson for him?????
In the shitter. He’s gotten off so easy. Kids can have sticky fingers, but it’s not like OP left their card out. Kid had to move with intention here start to finish. There were numerous points at which the kid’s common sense could’ve (should’ve) kicked in. No way this isn’t an issue later down the line.
Read the rest of OPs comments. There will be consequences regardless.
So he can't play the game anymore? He's also going to work to pay OP back.
honestly, even if Capital One recoup the charges, sell his stuff. fucking deserves it and he won't learn otherwise (a sit down won't teach him shit if he's willing to do something like this).
Fuck microtransactions.
Nice to see the parents taking your side. Doesn't happen a lot, if Reddit is anything to go by.
Hey at least his parents are onboard with you and not some of those parents that go “oh well he didn’t mean to!” And leave it at that.
I had kleptomania when I was a kid and I mostly stole money. I also statted for intelligence and not wisdom so I kinda know how it feels. One thing that did help scare me straight is that my sister took me to the local precint and basically threatened to have me jailed for theft. It worked on me because I was afraid of having any sort of official criminal history because of how it would look like in background checks for getting jobs. Yes, I was a teen, but back then I already knew how brutal employers in my country when it comes to criminal history no matter how minor. One of the requirements, even now, when job searching is a special clearance from the equivalent of our FBI that states that you have no outstanding warrants, etc. Also, he may be old enough to start earning pocket money. He had no issue spending your money because it is not his money and the act of money being deducted from you does not affect him in any concrete way. Him having his own prepaid card that he loads with his own money that he earned on his own may help him realize that, hey, he now has no money because he kept spending it all on microtransactions and he starts feeling the pinch and maybe a little of how you felt seeing all those charges to your card.
Holy shit! You can’t even win real money with Zynga. WTH was he playing? FarmVille?
Farmville 3.
Man. I understand the appeal, but damn. I’m glad to read the other comments that you’re handling it very well with his working it off, etc…. Well done uncle.
I'm really disappointed .. the kid's spending on a game under Zynga. Anyways, there's mostly window time to refund these online charges, especially banks and google play knows these incidents occur more often than non-gamers think it does. "You were unaware when these charges were made", "The charges were made in a new device that you don't normally use", "The charges are from an app you don't normally use", these are some points they reason out when refunding unknown charges from online game apps. Most likely you have a high chance on refund, google play will reverse these charges and disable the kid's account if they don't pay it back.
This is a great condom ad, thanks!!
Hilarious that there is so many small transaction purchases except those are the worst in value when buying into games, actually would of had less losses if he had just bought like 3 packs of 100 LOL. All points aside about the cost tho, this is pretty crazy to see and why extra verification for purchasing, on mobile apps, really needs to be implemented. It's too easy for people to just buy crap on phone games, wild predatory purchasing power.
I work in fraud Investigations for a bank. Since you reported that the card was locked up and the kid actually stole it I would say it's highly likely they'll credit the charges. You wouldn't believe how often this happens. I've seen accounts with THOUSANDS of dollars being charged to fortnight. And since the parent added the card to the game console for 1 charge that was allowed they were liable for ALL of them because it's their responsibility to either remove the card or password lock it on the account.
How that many charges are allowed to go through in one day, i will never understand. They need to have limits on this.
Our son did this and we sold his PS4, got most of it back from PlayStation as well luckily.
The console and bike should be taken away. He does not deserve them.
I'm 50/50 on the bike, it's how he gets to/from school and is his main source of exercise.
Ba-zynga 
At least his parents seem to be in agreement with you.
His dad and stepmom (my sister) are supportive of the plan.
At least glad to see that your sister and relevant in-laws are being reasonable and supportive of you on this issue
He'll make it big in politics!
That’s messed up. More than mildly infuriating lol. Glad there seems to be a repercussions for his actions, so many would say it’s just a kid and let them go off with a slap on the wrist. Make the repercussions hurt but don’t fully suffocate him.
I’m more terrified that he at the age that is capable of doing this but hasn’t been taught of the consequence to actually go through with it. I’m glad he is made to pay every single cent back. He better be grounded outside of working as well. Including during summer vacation. Like how is this something you need to teach? Common sense just isn’t there. I’m more worried if he knew the risk but the thrill is what he is after. Was he apologetic at least OP?
Oh man... This reminds me of the time my little brother bought $250 worth of Team Fortress items and then promptly deleted them when I found out. Steam did not like that at all and I had a negative balance for about two years. I was beyond pissed.
Little shit! He'll be getting nothing for a while!!!
I don’t understand the security system in your country, In my country there is a limit to purchase, if crossed, it will ask for OTP from me. If not provided and the card kept in usage it will be blocked… Debt or credit cards, if anyone tried to steal it physically or electronically it won’t work for them, it is almost useless nowadays to steal a one.
that console and bike would be GONE regardless if you get the money back if that were me
Jesus Christ, I did a similar thing when I was a little kid but it was “only” 300, how do you even spend 1 400 in a month, that’s insane. Ik, microtransactions are predatory nowadays but jfc that bad?!
You should be aware that if someone uses your credit card without permission, the maximum you can be liable for is $50 under the Fair Credit Billing Act. They cannot make you pay for this, and any suggestion they make that they can is simply an attempt to fool you into paying for it so they don't have to eat the charges.
I vote take the console and bike away anyway. Hide them. Tell him you already sold them but he still owes you the money anyway. Once it's paid off, ask if he has learned anything from doing that. Depending on his answer, either give them back, or then actually sell them.
The only electronic device that kid would get from me from now on is some Old Persons phone, without any good OS which can receive SMS and phone calls
He should have all of that stuff taken away regardless of whether or not the charges are reversed. What lesson is being taught? That it's all good once the bank takes care of it?
Keep an eye on this kids video game addiction. These payments look like the game completely shut his brain off.
I'm glad your sister and husband are not making excuses for him and making him accountable. I love your solution.
It sounds like you're taking a really measured and reasonable approach to this. I hope the kid learns something from this experience.
Wonder how and why the kid thought it was a okay thing to literally steal? What are his parents doing to have not noticed him physically entering ur safe for one thing?
How would the kid even know about the safe? How did he know there was a key for it in his mom's purse? He must have been looking for anything he could steal. I doubt it occurred to some kid that adults sometimes keep back-up credit cards in a safe. It's more like he set out to steal, found something to steal, and then figured out a way to use it.
Police won’t charge? That makes no sense. It was stolen. I get some people thinking it’s maybe excessive due to age but it is not like you left it out in the child’s presence. The kid is never going to learn until real consequences hit him. $1400 is an escalation. You left your card out and a kid used it, that is a mistake on kids part. Deliberately going into a locked location to take it? That is no mistake. Every time i have seen this it just escalates and doesn’t end well because it has already passed the point of a phase. You should also distance yourself from the kid, not completely leave his life though, it sounds like he needs a positive presence in his life like you. You need to cut off the gifts and everything else until you are sure he changes.
Zero money will be earned mowing lawns. What is his punishment if the charges aren’t reversed?
The subdivision they live in doesn't have coverage by any lawn care company, and there's lots of retired folks. He did it last summer for spending money and was pulling in $150 a day.
And what’s the punishment if the charges are reversed? If they are then it’s just all ok?
Per my sister and BIL, even IF the charges are reversed, he's going to "work it off." No allowance, no video games, and most (if not all) the money he makes this summer mowing grass and scooping poop is going to be "confiscated" into a high-yield savings account, to be released to him when he's 18.
Fuck Zynga with all their dumbass transactions. The kid sucks too, but I really hate Zynga.
I eventually got in trouble doing as a kid when the little things I bought noticed. I didn’t steal the card, I just had the number, expiration date, and cvv memorized. It was just a pizza here or there. I’m not a supercriminal like this brat.
Idk why but when you said you were “off-grid” made me envision you as Ron Swanson. You are now my hero 🫡
How old is he? He must be quite young if police aren’t willing to get involved? This sucks extremely and I’m so sorry. But I’m glad you sister and her husband are doing something about it. Also what is this charge? Is this like phone games? Or porn? Or what? I just don’t know what would ring up like that.