Jacob Eason, Drew Lock, and Geno Smith walk into a bar. They all immediately get carded because no one knows who the fuck those guys are.
I'm actually a fan of Drew Lock's mobility. He was able to juke so hard that his covid tracer ended up in the corner of the room.
I think there's a good chance that DK Metcalf gets frustrated and straight up eats one of your QB's during a game.
Ugh. I can't tell you how tired I am of memes based on virtuoso Spanish painter Francisco Goya's "black" period showing up on r/NFL. Can we get something original like ugly closeups of QB's faces for a change?
My friend works at a luxury dealership in Bellevue, which might share a name with an expensive property in monopoly.
Geno Smith came in one day after 2019 season ended to pick up his car from being serviced. The hostess (service center associate or some nonsense title for the models that the salesmen want to bang), asks him his name so she can have the car brought around.
Geno goes off on her saying "you know who I am." won't let up. Security called. He eventually calms down and gets his whip.
Like your first year in Seattle, backing up Russ who's never out, anyone is going to recognize you, especially some 20 something European import...
>I think there's a good chance that DK Metcalf gets frustrated and straight up eats one of your QB's during a game.
Perhaps they're saving that for sweeps.
> I think there’s a good chance that DK Metcalf gets frustrated and straight up eats one of your QB’s during a game.
DK is the largest wide receiver; why doesn’t he just eat the quarterback?
Seems like a lot of these commenters don't know how to properly format a roast. They just drop a fact like our QBs are bad and walk away expecting that to be funny enough. There's no setup of a joke.
Just like there's no offensive setup where our QBs do good.
The best chance for relevancy the New York Jets have had in over a decade is because of the Seattle Seahawks. Congrats you did something our entire organization couldn't.
Fun fact, the Seahawks call their fanbase the 12th Man. This is fitting, as this team would need to put 12 men on the field to be competitive this year.
It's all but guaranteed, I believe Silver said relatively recently that us and Vegas are getting expansion teams right before the NBA negotiates their new media deal.
The big thing is Carlton owns his dorkiness, he is who he is, and he's proud if it.
Wilson just feels kinda fake and corporate, like a lot of his slogans and nicknames were focus-grouped, and he never felt like he spoke candidly.
The only times I've seen that working for a QB is when it's off-the-cuff and in the moment. We all remember "R-E-L-A-X" or "YOU LIKE THAT?" (Jesus, even **Kirk** is less fake and Corny) but who the hell is gonna legit remember "Mr Unlimited" or "Let Russ Cook" in a few years?
Yeah Wilson is more focused on building his personal "brand" than anything.
Everytime I bring it up I now sound like the salty ex, but his play on the field really took a turn when he signed his new contract in 2015 and then again in 2017. It was all about him, letting Russ cook, and what not.
Part of me thinks he saw how big the "Legion of Boom" nickname got and wanted something like that for himself.
But again, that kinda came about naturally, and the LOB name stuck because they were really fucking good, and Wilson started pushing his gimmicks after he fell to earth a little bit and not when he was at his peak.
Exactly. I played football in HS with a kid who had NFL level athletic talent (Never made it off the practice squad, partially because he tried going the basketball route for most of college)
Dude was the very definition of a big fish in a small pond, and even he got mocked relentlessly for trying to give himself a badass nickname despite being a pretty nice guy and our star player.
> Dude was the very definition of a big fish in a small pond
I feel like that's the story of a lot of folks that played high school or college sports. For most of their life they're told they're the best the coach has ever seen, best player in their school, region, etc.
Then they get to college and they're just shocked about the level of talent
The ancient Romans had a saying: "If you start the season with Drew Lock and Geno Smith as your quarterbacks your team is gonna suck balls". I never really understood it until this year.
Sometimes the meaning of those ancient phrases gets lost in translation and you need a really clear example to grasp what the original speaker was trying to say. Translating “suck balls” is probably tricky from Latin to modern English.
The Storm is our WNBA team and they are Seattle's most recent championship team.
At least we have the prospect of the Mariners breaking the longest playoff drought in all of major league sports!
Fuck my life
Let’s be honest, the best QBs in Seahawks franchise history are:
A corny weirdo who you traded to a former division rival named Russ
A boring bald guy named Hasselbeck
Some journeyman QB with a German name that nobody remembers (who also played for a college that no longer exists)
Jim Zorn, who is more famous for calling a terrible fake FG play on MNF against the Giants than he is for his playing career
No joke, in the late 90s, after Allen bought the team, they had a $10 ticket. My dad and I bought season tickets at that price for a few years and it was awesome.
The Osprey, also known as the seahawk is a large raptor that can fly up to about 80 MPH. Which is also the speed that fans will be leaving the stadium at after seeing a few snaps of Drew Lock
It's 1993. Nirvana and the entire grunge scene are still in their heydey, and Seattle is more on the map than ever before. Not only that, the Seahawks have the #2 overall pick in the draft! They can get any QB they want to turn their team around, and Seattle sports will finally eclipse the city's music scene on the national stage! One must wonder who they'll pick...
I'm Mirer'd in thought at the endless possibilities. It will be great to get out that previous quagMirer.
Why, I bet this new QB will have the best rookie season of any QB to this point in history!
Hey, give us credit, at least Mirer was largely considered the right pick. Dont forget about how we also had the #2 pick in 1977 and traded our shot at Tony Dorsett to move down for some RT out of Tulsa.
Your franchise picked older and thinner Mike McCarthy over your Hall of Fame quarterback, and only Carolina can best you on "most hilarious starting quarterback battle."
To be fair, if your bf was sliding into the dm's of other girls, you'd probably be pissed too. That's basically what Russ did. So I get those who are still sore over the issue.
I'm of the opinion to just let the Russ shit go and let him ride it up in Denver and just focus on the here and now with the team.
Damn you rule 1 for making me have to think about this.
- Lumen Field is a terrible name for a stadium. Not Acrid or whatever the fuck they named Heinz Feild bad, but still pretty bad.
- Drew Lock is your new QB and that’s the best case scenario. If Russell barely survived behind that line Drew Lock will die.
- Are we absolutely sure Drew Lock and Daniel Jones aren’t the same person?
- You can’t stop killing Running Backs since Marshawn left.
- You’ll finally have to contend with the fact that Russell Wilson is a fucking weirdo.
- DK Metcalf might as well throw the ball to himself this season.
- You went from the Legion of Boom to the Putty Patrollers.
Yeah I just don’t hate you guys enough.
Drew Lock will probably die, but the o-line had started to get better and dare I say mediocre the last season or two. Some of Wilson’s sacks the last season were from him seeing ghosts and scrambling before it was necessary. Definitely understand though because he got used to having such a shitty line.
You know, I used to think the Seahawks fandom hated our fandom due to the repeat playoff matchups, but really, it's because we're just complete opposites.
- Our star Quarterback made a big deal about considering retirement or a trade, but ultimately will retire here, yours said he wanted to stay up until the day he was finally able to force his way out.
- Seattle is a large metropolitan area that has lost major sports franchises to Oklahoma city and Milwaukee of all places, Green Bay is a flyspeck that'll never lose it's team.
- Every gameday your stadium is full of young adults who bandwagoned the team in childhood, ours is full of crusty retirees who still remember Lombardi and think of the Vikings as an expansion franchise.
- Our star quarterback is estranged with his brother, and your former star safety is so close to his brother that even Brady thinks it's weird.
> Every gameday your stadium is full of young adults who bandwagoned the team in childhood
Isn't watching a team as a kid and continuing to watch them as an adult just about the opposite of bandwagoning?
Is it bandwagoning if you grew up watching the team? I think calling fanbases bandwagoners is just boomers on other teams calling other fanbases young, which is somehow bad.
If you asked 10 different people to define what a Bandwagoner is, you'd get 10 different answers.
If I wasn't making a roast post, I'd have used a different word, but yeah, if you're not jumping ship the second your team starts to suck/be mediocre, you're not a bandwagoner imo.
First point is a bit off, tbh. I feel like Russ would've stayed if the Hawks made the same decision about their head coach at the end of last season that the Packers did with Mike McCarthy.
I know it's a roast, but still. But honestly, that might add to your point that the Hawks are just the Bizarro-Packers.
The first one is why I hate you. Your management actually moved on from McCarthy to keep your antivax q spouting dipshit of a qb happy and we choose to keep ours over the corny dad who is the best qb we will ever have.
Hey now, Rodgers is an antivax hippy but he's not a Q spouter. You're thinking of Kirk. Rodgers actually recently mentioned that Newsmax and co wanted to have him on and he told them to fuck off.
But yeah, *if* Wilson was willing to stay if Pete left, that was a bad choice, though I'm not convinced that he didn't see Stafford/Brady's success in jumping ship to a stacked team and wanted that for himself.
You gave up a haul for a guy that has only one more interception than Vince Wilfork.
And gave him the bag.
[Believe me when i say that this image will be two things:More entertaining and memorable than the Seahawks this upcoming season,and fans reaction to Drew Lock's play.](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BfhDn-hCYAAzpEK?format=jpg&name=small)
Thanks for reminding the world that Geno Smith exists btw,because the only punch that he gave the team is like the one he got to his jaw that one time.
Now that your franchise is basement-tier and we are trying to establish a dynasty, it’s only just and balanced that you beat us at least once a year for no damn reason at all
Eh. I feel like we're not even lucky enough for that kind of fluke without Russ. McVay runs circles around Pete, and not just because he's like 1/4 his age.
Y’all’s fan base is so toxic that my wife ranked it the most toxic in football. My wife also lived in Texas as a child and hates the Cowboys specifically and solely because of their fans.
Our QBs now form the Legion of Whom?
Ha Selfburn. Nice.
Jacob Eason, Drew Lock, and Geno Smith walk into a bar. They all immediately get carded because no one knows who the fuck those guys are. I'm actually a fan of Drew Lock's mobility. He was able to juke so hard that his covid tracer ended up in the corner of the room. I think there's a good chance that DK Metcalf gets frustrated and straight up eats one of your QB's during a game.
> I think there's a good chance that DK Metcalf gets frustrated and straight up eats one of your QB's during a game. Color me intrigued.
I’m sickened but curious by this
[Mid-Season DK Metcalf](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/8/82/Francisco_de_Goya%2C_Saturno_devorando_a_su_hijo_%281819-1823%29.jpg/697px-Francisco_de_Goya%2C_Saturno_devorando_a_su_hijo_%281819-1823%29.jpg)
Ugh. I can't tell you how tired I am of memes based on virtuoso Spanish painter Francisco Goya's "black" period showing up on r/NFL. Can we get something original like ugly closeups of QB's faces for a change?
[I gotchu fam](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/8/82/Francisco_de_Goya%2C_Saturno_devorando_a_su_hijo_%281819-1823%29.jpg/697px-Francisco_de_Goya%2C_Saturno_devorando_a_su_hijo_%281819-1823%29.jpg)
That's much better, thanks
I’m more of a neo cubist fan myself.
[Here you go](https://cbssports.com/images/blogs/jon-ryan1-mccarthy-face-450.jpg)
I think I missed the stint Jim Gaffigan had as QB for the Seahawks.
Smh, who pulls out Kronos when we aren't roasting the Titans?
Maybe he is secretly Kirby and eating the qbs will give him their power... but I don't want him to have geno or Drew's power haha
My friend works at a luxury dealership in Bellevue, which might share a name with an expensive property in monopoly. Geno Smith came in one day after 2019 season ended to pick up his car from being serviced. The hostess (service center associate or some nonsense title for the models that the salesmen want to bang), asks him his name so she can have the car brought around. Geno goes off on her saying "you know who I am." won't let up. Security called. He eventually calms down and gets his whip. Like your first year in Seattle, backing up Russ who's never out, anyone is going to recognize you, especially some 20 something European import...
*Geno Smith punches the bouncer over 600 bucks* Ohhh Geno. Come on in!
>I think there's a good chance that DK Metcalf gets frustrated and straight up eats one of your QB's during a game. Perhaps they're saving that for sweeps.
> I think there’s a good chance that DK Metcalf gets frustrated and straight up eats one of your QB’s during a game. DK is the largest wide receiver; why doesn’t he just eat the quarterback?
AFC West fans are well aware of who Drew Lock is. Not that it's any better for Seattle...
These roasts are worse than our quarterbacks
Seems like a lot of these commenters don't know how to properly format a roast. They just drop a fact like our QBs are bad and walk away expecting that to be funny enough. There's no setup of a joke. Just like there's no offensive setup where our QBs do good.
Everyone saving their strength for the Cowboys tomorrow.
oh god oh god I haven't written any cowboys jokes yet. fuck.
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Exactly, all I'm asking is for a little creativity!
Wow, it’s like you’re watching the Seahawks’ offense
ok that was pretty good
[Thank you](https://i.imgur.com/Lc8QoSc.jpg)
I'm trying to remember. Was the a day in the life of the 12th man story two or three years ago? Because that was funny.
The first year they did roasts there were some pretty good ones, the Pats version of that was the gold standard, but I think ours was decent too.
The roasters here are almost as bad as former Seahawks OL coach Tom Cable
This is what happens when you dominate for 15 years but you have the patriots and packers to take the heat
The best chance for relevancy the New York Jets have had in over a decade is because of the Seattle Seahawks. Congrats you did something our entire organization couldn't.
Fun fact, the Seahawks call their fanbase the 12th Man. This is fitting, as this team would need to put 12 men on the field to be competitive this year.
In the other football, some teams have lost despite being a man-up. I believe the Seahawks could find such a way.
Hey an actual original one! Well done
Seattle is going to be really bad this year but atleast it is almost basketball season…
This one I like a lot. F Clay Bennett and David Stern
All my homies hate Clay Bennett
That's just mean but this has to be my favorite one so far.
I mean, at least the Mariners don't suck? Ah, who am I kidding, I hope the Sonics get revived someday; Climate Pledge could certainly handle them.
They may have changed names but It’ll always be the Key and Safeco Field for me. Hawks have had too many name changes to care what it’s called…
Still "the clink" to me
It's all but guaranteed, I believe Silver said relatively recently that us and Vegas are getting expansion teams right before the NBA negotiates their new media deal.
I love rooting for my favorite team: Whoever is playing OKC
Can't wait for the annual OKC eliminated from the playoffs thread.
Oh my god you motherfucker lol
Oof
Hey come on now, the storm are fundamentally sound enough to be champions!
Don't worry they can root on the Trailblazers!
Wow….I’ve never upvoted out of anger before.
This one is my favorite
I didnt think I was going to legitimately laugh in this thread, but alright, this was a good one.
As a Portland based fan, this works for the blazers too =(
DK Metcalf looks like Milli Vanilli. Either one.
Girl you know it's true
G-g-g-girl
He does blame a lot of his dropped passes on the rain.
Russell Wilson makes drew lock look like Malcom x
It was Mooney!!
"Wow, Dave, I didn't know you liked to get wet. You know -- Sherman Helmsley."
PCP…..Angellll Dussst.
Give me your sandwich
If Dave doesn’t fix his material, Wayne Brady might have to choke a bitch.
Goddamit, now you've got me going back watching Negrodamus. Goddamn Mooney was a legend.
Q: Negrodamus, why is George Bush so sure that Iraq has weapons of mass destruction? A: Because he has the receipt.
Oh man Bill Hicks made this joke about the first gulf war lol.
This one got me
This team spent years trying to convince us Russell Wilson was cool instead of the real life version of Carlton.
You are telling me that Carlton is not cool? GTFO.
Well it's not unusual
To be loved by anyone
Lets Ride!
Les righhh
Les neighhhhh
This is v. disrespectful to Mister Banks.
Yeah for real. Carlton might be corny, but he stands up for Will and always has his back.
The big thing is Carlton owns his dorkiness, he is who he is, and he's proud if it. Wilson just feels kinda fake and corporate, like a lot of his slogans and nicknames were focus-grouped, and he never felt like he spoke candidly. The only times I've seen that working for a QB is when it's off-the-cuff and in the moment. We all remember "R-E-L-A-X" or "YOU LIKE THAT?" (Jesus, even **Kirk** is less fake and Corny) but who the hell is gonna legit remember "Mr Unlimited" or "Let Russ Cook" in a few years?
Yeah Wilson is more focused on building his personal "brand" than anything. Everytime I bring it up I now sound like the salty ex, but his play on the field really took a turn when he signed his new contract in 2015 and then again in 2017. It was all about him, letting Russ cook, and what not.
Part of me thinks he saw how big the "Legion of Boom" nickname got and wanted something like that for himself. But again, that kinda came about naturally, and the LOB name stuck because they were really fucking good, and Wilson started pushing his gimmicks after he fell to earth a little bit and not when he was at his peak.
You can't give yourself your own nickname, it just never works.
Exactly. I played football in HS with a kid who had NFL level athletic talent (Never made it off the practice squad, partially because he tried going the basketball route for most of college) Dude was the very definition of a big fish in a small pond, and even he got mocked relentlessly for trying to give himself a badass nickname despite being a pretty nice guy and our star player.
> Dude was the very definition of a big fish in a small pond I feel like that's the story of a lot of folks that played high school or college sports. For most of their life they're told they're the best the coach has ever seen, best player in their school, region, etc. Then they get to college and they're just shocked about the level of talent
The ancient Romans had a saying: "If you start the season with Drew Lock and Geno Smith as your quarterbacks your team is gonna suck balls". I never really understood it until this year.
Damn this one really makes you think
What? No “In Geno Veritas?”
Sometimes the meaning of those ancient phrases gets lost in translation and you need a really clear example to grasp what the original speaker was trying to say. Translating “suck balls” is probably tricky from Latin to modern English.
You know things are bad in Seattle when our team seems to have a better outlook for the upcoming season with Carson freakin’ Wentz as our starting QB.
“ready to go ahead.. and uhh.. start to take command”
Commie country! Let’s seize.
This is my bar for the season. If we do better than Washington, it was a successful season.
2025 NFC West champions, the Oklahoma City Seahawks
Now that's just mean Oklahoma is going to change the name, something like the Storm
I think “Bombings” is available.
jesus fuckin christ bro lol
The MLS has the Chicago Fire so it’s nothing new to have a team named for a disaster in the city. I mean shit, we already have the New York Jets
Yes, but the New York Jets have been a disaster since the early 70s.
Ruthless. This guy has no Ruth’s.
San Jose Earthquakes checking in
It's ok, that happened before 2013, so none of their fans will get the reference anyway.
The Storm is our WNBA team and they are Seattle's most recent championship team. At least we have the prospect of the Mariners breaking the longest playoff drought in all of major league sports! Fuck my life
The best player on your team sucks on binkies.
It’s a method of intimidation you wouldn’t understand
That shit is weird
Damn right he does.
Hey Michael Dickson doesn't do that.
THIS is Drew Lock's year
“I don’t think I’m gonna get bored winning.”- Jamal Adams, the first ever player to go from the Jets to a worse situation.
The Seahawks won more divisions in Jamal Adams' first season with them than the Jets have in ~~twenty~~ 19.6 years
Jets fan getting roasted by a Seattle fan in the Seattle roast thread is the most jets thing
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We can take solace in the fact that whoever we draft to play QB in the first round next year is already better than Zach Wilson
Better at football? Probably. Better at banging milfs? Doubtful.
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Mike "Mike White" White Put some respect on his name .
Mike "Don't Call Me Mike "Mike White" White" White
The last time the Jets officially won the AFC East was December 29,2002. So no. Not 20 years.
Thanks, corrected my post.
Thank you. Jamal has also won as many playoff games in Seattle than he did in NY.
I'm fairly sure that the Jets are still in a worse situation, but still funny.
Pete Carroll was known to leave a team before things start to fall apart. Good news everyone! He decided to stay *after* things have fallen apart. 👍🏾
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Jamal Adams has 10 working fingers (impossible challenge)
I wouldn’t say prized… and you’re completely correct. Dude doesn’t worry about covid ever because he doesn’t catch anything.
Your coach looks like an old lesbian who smacks gum like a $5 hooker.
Lmao can someone put him side by side with ellen degeneres
I have never seen Ellem Degeneres and Pete Carroll in the same room before. 🤔
Let’s be honest, the best QBs in Seahawks franchise history are: A corny weirdo who you traded to a former division rival named Russ A boring bald guy named Hasselbeck Some journeyman QB with a German name that nobody remembers (who also played for a college that no longer exists) Jim Zorn, who is more famous for calling a terrible fake FG play on MNF against the Giants than he is for his playing career
THERE WILL BE NO DAVE KRIEG SLANDER IN THIS HOUSE!! 😂 Oh yeah. Paul Skansi ✌🏼
Dave Krieg dropped his phone at least 6 times reading that.
We had Warren Moon at one point
Hey now, that boring bald guy had one of the best commercials played every break in the early days of NFLN. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=locNW8S_7wk
From the era of the 12th Man to $12 seats at home games. Quite the transition no?
Seats are finally cheap enough that their core demographic can afford tickets with their allowances.
No joke, in the late 90s, after Allen bought the team, they had a $10 ticket. My dad and I bought season tickets at that price for a few years and it was awesome.
The Osprey, also known as the seahawk is a large raptor that can fly up to about 80 MPH. Which is also the speed that fans will be leaving the stadium at after seeing a few snaps of Drew Lock
Not in Seattle traffic we won't lol
Only Seattle fans driving Altimas will
It's 1993. Nirvana and the entire grunge scene are still in their heydey, and Seattle is more on the map than ever before. Not only that, the Seahawks have the #2 overall pick in the draft! They can get any QB they want to turn their team around, and Seattle sports will finally eclipse the city's music scene on the national stage! One must wonder who they'll pick...
I'm Mirer'd in thought at the endless possibilities. It will be great to get out that previous quagMirer. Why, I bet this new QB will have the best rookie season of any QB to this point in history!
Hey, give us credit, at least Mirer was largely considered the right pick. Dont forget about how we also had the #2 pick in 1977 and traded our shot at Tony Dorsett to move down for some RT out of Tulsa.
Jamal Adams.
BOOM, roasted.
Your franchise picked older and thinner Mike McCarthy over your Hall of Fame quarterback, and only Carolina can best you on "most hilarious starting quarterback battle."
As a Baker Bro I'll not tolerate this
Rhule is the one making it hilarious, not the QBs
Carolina at least has a obvious starter. If anything it’s only slightly worse than the Steelers situation
Yes but does our head coach know we have an obvious starter? Never overestimate Matt Rhule’s Coaching.
Fuck that hurts also Carolina doesn't have a qb battle it's Baker who is immeasurably better than our gruesome twosome.
The Seahawks have been in the league as long as the Bucs and have only gotten half the amount of Superbowls… *slaps table* you just got jammed
I would rather watch Morbius six times in a row than watch Geno Smith or Drew Lock
It’s Lockin time
HES GONNA LOCK!
Lmfao!!!
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This is beyond true sadly our sub has gone full on spurned gf mode it's embarrassing.
To be fair, if your bf was sliding into the dm's of other girls, you'd probably be pissed too. That's basically what Russ did. So I get those who are still sore over the issue. I'm of the opinion to just let the Russ shit go and let him ride it up in Denver and just focus on the here and now with the team.
Bold of you to assume that they are smart enough to go/get to college.
Some of us are just too poor :(
That's what student loans are for!!! Don't mind the orphan crushing machine.
Damn you rule 1 for making me have to think about this. - Lumen Field is a terrible name for a stadium. Not Acrid or whatever the fuck they named Heinz Feild bad, but still pretty bad. - Drew Lock is your new QB and that’s the best case scenario. If Russell barely survived behind that line Drew Lock will die. - Are we absolutely sure Drew Lock and Daniel Jones aren’t the same person? - You can’t stop killing Running Backs since Marshawn left. - You’ll finally have to contend with the fact that Russell Wilson is a fucking weirdo. - DK Metcalf might as well throw the ball to himself this season. - You went from the Legion of Boom to the Putty Patrollers. Yeah I just don’t hate you guys enough.
> Are we absolutely sure Drew Lock and Daniel Jones aren’t the same person? Drew Lock is store brand Daniel Jones.
Drew Lock is Wish.con Andrew Luck
There’s going to be a “Drew Lock” rule next season to handle players killed in the line of duty.
players killed *behind* the line of duty.
Drew Lock will probably die, but the o-line had started to get better and dare I say mediocre the last season or two. Some of Wilson’s sacks the last season were from him seeing ghosts and scrambling before it was necessary. Definitely understand though because he got used to having such a shitty line.
You know, I used to think the Seahawks fandom hated our fandom due to the repeat playoff matchups, but really, it's because we're just complete opposites. - Our star Quarterback made a big deal about considering retirement or a trade, but ultimately will retire here, yours said he wanted to stay up until the day he was finally able to force his way out. - Seattle is a large metropolitan area that has lost major sports franchises to Oklahoma city and Milwaukee of all places, Green Bay is a flyspeck that'll never lose it's team. - Every gameday your stadium is full of young adults who bandwagoned the team in childhood, ours is full of crusty retirees who still remember Lombardi and think of the Vikings as an expansion franchise. - Our star quarterback is estranged with his brother, and your former star safety is so close to his brother that even Brady thinks it's weird.
> Every gameday your stadium is full of young adults who bandwagoned the team in childhood Isn't watching a team as a kid and continuing to watch them as an adult just about the opposite of bandwagoning?
My thoughts exactly.
Is it bandwagoning if you grew up watching the team? I think calling fanbases bandwagoners is just boomers on other teams calling other fanbases young, which is somehow bad.
If you asked 10 different people to define what a Bandwagoner is, you'd get 10 different answers. If I wasn't making a roast post, I'd have used a different word, but yeah, if you're not jumping ship the second your team starts to suck/be mediocre, you're not a bandwagoner imo.
First point is a bit off, tbh. I feel like Russ would've stayed if the Hawks made the same decision about their head coach at the end of last season that the Packers did with Mike McCarthy. I know it's a roast, but still. But honestly, that might add to your point that the Hawks are just the Bizarro-Packers.
The first one is why I hate you. Your management actually moved on from McCarthy to keep your antivax q spouting dipshit of a qb happy and we choose to keep ours over the corny dad who is the best qb we will ever have.
Hey now, Rodgers is an antivax hippy but he's not a Q spouter. You're thinking of Kirk. Rodgers actually recently mentioned that Newsmax and co wanted to have him on and he told them to fuck off. But yeah, *if* Wilson was willing to stay if Pete left, that was a bad choice, though I'm not convinced that he didn't see Stafford/Brady's success in jumping ship to a stacked team and wanted that for himself.
The Mariners have a more hopeful fanbase than you.
The Mariners are good!
Hey look at the bright side .. Drew Lock will have just as many TDs with DK as Russell Wilson will this year
You gave up a haul for a guy that has only one more interception than Vince Wilfork. And gave him the bag. [Believe me when i say that this image will be two things:More entertaining and memorable than the Seahawks this upcoming season,and fans reaction to Drew Lock's play.](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BfhDn-hCYAAzpEK?format=jpg&name=small) Thanks for reminding the world that Geno Smith exists btw,because the only punch that he gave the team is like the one he got to his jaw that one time.
Marshawn Lynch was recently arrested in Las Vegas on suspicion of DUI, marking the second-most costly time that he should’ve just run.
No thanks, I'll pass... >!FROM THE GOAL LINE AND THROW A PICK INSTEAD OF HANDING THE BALL OFF TO MY GENERATIONAL RB AMIRITE??!?!!<
Lol yeah this was a good setup
The best part of your season was a play by your punter.
Yeah but it was cool at least.
Well yeah he's our best player.
To be fair it was pretty damn cool.
Now that your franchise is basement-tier and we are trying to establish a dynasty, it’s only just and balanced that you beat us at least once a year for no damn reason at all
Eh. I feel like we're not even lucky enough for that kind of fluke without Russ. McVay runs circles around Pete, and not just because he's like 1/4 his age.
Your franchise’s future is so bleak that your QB left to get last place in the AFC West
No Seahawks fan has ever fully unrolled a condom.
https://i.imgur.com/frH5o0t.jpg
Enjoy being Giants West for the next few years!
You know what they say, you only roast the ones you love. So I’m going to let this one go.
Y’all’s fan base is so toxic that my wife ranked it the most toxic in football. My wife also lived in Texas as a child and hates the Cowboys specifically and solely because of their fans.
You got fleeced by the Jets
We traded 2 firsts for Jamal Adams and got 2 firsts for Russ…
Yeah, but the Jets 2 first rounders will end up being worth something.
https://memebase.cheezburger.com/tag/russell-wilson
damn I know bears fans live in the past and all but linking to a cheezburger/memebase page?
Well, I guess at least they'll have a locksmith arrangement at quarterback.....
Seahawks fans halfway through the season: “I understand why Kurt Cobain did it now…”