My main metric is how disappointed my parents would be if I brought him to Thanksgiving dinner-- I believe they could at least tolerate the devil, but they'd draw the line at a shirtless man in a skirt stabbing himself with a fork and moaning while he does it
I don't know, but I feel like he could act normal outside of situations that allow for smacking people. I think he could put on a nice black button up shirt with the top couple of buttons undone and sleeves pushed up a bit, maybe a nice simple necklace, and some nice dress pants, and behave nicely at a family dinner. He seems to understand consent, so I assume he understands that they have to consent to him doing that stuff in front of them. Otherwise, he would be forcing them to be nonconsensual participants.
Maybe an unpopular opinion, but I think at the beginning of the game, he'd be even more acceptable than Astarion. I think you may just have to explain the bruises, but you could come up with a normal sounding explanation.
Yeah, I don't think Raphael is good to bring home. He'd just say something about foxes or something and make my mom concerned. I think Astarion would be good to bring home by the end of the game, but he's still a vampire that might worry a parent. Meanwhile, Abdirak is just a goth man who likes bdsm in his personal time. There's no indication that he would even alert your family to that part of him, so he seems like a pretty normal guy to bring home. He'd probably even offer to help in the kitchen. Parents will love him.
He's so interested in torturing people that he was brought in as an outside consultant on how to torture people better. He also immediately trys to talk you into doing it as well. He's not exactly subtle about it, and it's not in his personal time, it's his job. Think you're downplaying him quite a bit.
Well, his opponent is a literal devil doing full time noncon torture and manipulation. But you’re somewhat right. I’d still put Raphael behind Abdirak because I can imagine him to start playing little games during the dinner with your parents, pretending to be the good guy, and then would totally use this to his advantage
Ah, but he draws the line at pain with no purpose. He's a twisted priest, just trying to spread the word of the Maiden of Pain. Actually kind of wholesome and he finds the goblins quite uncouth in their habits.
Agreed. Like I know I had to clarify to the other user that I don't actually believe that he's a totally innocent man you could bring home to your parents, but in all seriousness, out of these guys, he's got to be the most tame option. Yes, he's a priest of Loviatar, but that doesn't mean he's unable to cool off on the bdsm stuff in certain occasions. Everyone on this list did bad stuff, but he's certainly far from the worst on this list.
So by that standard the stabby zombie at #10 (I can't remember his name) should be further up the list. He's a DOCTOR, and he cares about teaching! He comes from a... well off? family.
Loviatar is using Abdirak for PR. You think you'll get the perfect Dom and then BAM. Sadism to an inch of your life without the aftercare.
Loviatar is kinda awful.
I mean... it's kinda working. I want Abdirak in my camp. We could always do with another cleric, Shadowheart wouldn't even mind the competition, she seemed to quite enjoy watching you getting railed.
What I'm hearing is, get your sado-dom fix with Abdirak then go to gentle-switch Halsin for the aftercare.
Fuck, my BG3 Hunk Harem is getting more complex.
I was inspired by my grad school friend (it looks like him) who told me he was walking back to his apartment one night a heard someone running up behind him and all he could think of was the Shrek fairy godmother serve cunt and die meme till the person eventually just ran past him.
Your parents would be right to question your attraction to True Soul Nere. That accursed male has the personality and grace of a Third Son.
That they would find him more acceptable than Loviatar’s Priest, however, is beyond comprehension.
My type is angst-ridden elf men who would gaslight me into working more to pay all the bills while they read books on philosophy all day and contribute nothing to the household.
Petition to put Abdirak after Raph cause I’m pretty sure my parents would be more appreciative of a consent and aftercare king than a dude who kicked someone into lava because his elevator got stalled.
... okay that makes me so sad though. What stats need boosting to get the "painslut daddy feeds me orange slices and tells me I did well and he's proud of me" scene??!?1!? I'll respec this bitch right now.
No no, you’re not socially unacceptable. They’re just afraid y’all would get mobbed by citizens vying for your attention every time you went out. Therefore, making it unacceptable to go out socially.
Because Raphael at least has us write a contract when he screws us over and you sell people into slavery (without contracts)?
Gotta cover your ass legally Mate
My lord, may I remind you that you’re an underground arm dealer, slaver and you torture people.
Edit, Oh you’re also responsible for explosive toys for refugees. (But I still love you ✨)
Okay Danny Devito's Penguin is too far even for me what
And this is coming from someone who has a thing for evil clowns ever since watching 1989's Joker as a kid
https://preview.redd.it/u8qhxngzdhvc1.png?width=2560&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e68d83c0f4b61e9b07963c5b4b572331679bc9b2
Literally my Tav looking at Dribbles
*Chk*. I can't be surprised that an *istik* on this site is attracted to a brainless corpse. Narcissism dowels run heavy in this place May Vlaakith claim you.
I saw Astarion first and had to double check that the list was going to be INCREASINGLY socially unacceptable. This subreddit is beyond strange and I love it lmao
I was like stupidly into Gribbo.
https://preview.redd.it/7md5prbyqivc1.jpeg?width=1039&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=69aa2ab876935bebce6841ca459dd12060f23741
Ah, into bad boys, surgeons, guys comfortable with some kinkier activities and men with open minds. I don’t see how any of this is unacceptable. Chase your bliss, hero.
Why does reddit have this recent trend of simping for video game toons? Go talk to to a real girl/man, strike up a convo or even ask for the time from. Video games wont love you back
God, that pic of Gorty always gets me bc while I *know* that’s light from something hitting the right side of his hair, my brain insists on seeing it as a blue streak in his emo bangs.
Why is the consent and aftercare king Abdirak more unacceptable than Raphael?!
My main metric is how disappointed my parents would be if I brought him to Thanksgiving dinner-- I believe they could at least tolerate the devil, but they'd draw the line at a shirtless man in a skirt stabbing himself with a fork and moaning while he does it
I don't know, but I feel like he could act normal outside of situations that allow for smacking people. I think he could put on a nice black button up shirt with the top couple of buttons undone and sleeves pushed up a bit, maybe a nice simple necklace, and some nice dress pants, and behave nicely at a family dinner. He seems to understand consent, so I assume he understands that they have to consent to him doing that stuff in front of them. Otherwise, he would be forcing them to be nonconsensual participants. Maybe an unpopular opinion, but I think at the beginning of the game, he'd be even more acceptable than Astarion. I think you may just have to explain the bruises, but you could come up with a normal sounding explanation.
And then you have Raphael, who noncon strips Astarion infront of the whole Inn
Yeah, I don't think Raphael is good to bring home. He'd just say something about foxes or something and make my mom concerned. I think Astarion would be good to bring home by the end of the game, but he's still a vampire that might worry a parent. Meanwhile, Abdirak is just a goth man who likes bdsm in his personal time. There's no indication that he would even alert your family to that part of him, so he seems like a pretty normal guy to bring home. He'd probably even offer to help in the kitchen. Parents will love him.
He's so interested in torturing people that he was brought in as an outside consultant on how to torture people better. He also immediately trys to talk you into doing it as well. He's not exactly subtle about it, and it's not in his personal time, it's his job. Think you're downplaying him quite a bit.
Well, his opponent is a literal devil doing full time noncon torture and manipulation. But you’re somewhat right. I’d still put Raphael behind Abdirak because I can imagine him to start playing little games during the dinner with your parents, pretending to be the good guy, and then would totally use this to his advantage
Ah, but he draws the line at pain with no purpose. He's a twisted priest, just trying to spread the word of the Maiden of Pain. Actually kind of wholesome and he finds the goblins quite uncouth in their habits.
I think you just don't like a man that knows how to worship Loviatar. He says the goblins causing pain without purpose is bad.
Certainly doesn't stop him from helping them. Also, lovitar is an evil goddess. She's a former follower of bhaal and Shar.
But he's pretty
I mean, it's really not any different than going to get a massage. Just in this case it's ritual BDSM instead of a deep tissue massage.
Being a cleric is not personal time. It's a full time vocation lmao. He does this everywhere with everything.
yeah it's actually a bit of a harmful stereotype that kinky people aren't able to behave "normally".
Agreed. Like I know I had to clarify to the other user that I don't actually believe that he's a totally innocent man you could bring home to your parents, but in all seriousness, out of these guys, he's got to be the most tame option. Yes, he's a priest of Loviatar, but that doesn't mean he's unable to cool off on the bdsm stuff in certain occasions. Everyone on this list did bad stuff, but he's certainly far from the worst on this list.
At least they have standards
So by that standard the stabby zombie at #10 (I can't remember his name) should be further up the list. He's a DOCTOR, and he cares about teaching! He comes from a... well off? family.
Well offed
You could also absolutely trust Raphael to put on a rehearsed charming display for dinner with your parents, especially in his human form.
Don’t know where this could go wrong…
If a contract or two forms, all the better 😈 I’m sure dinner would be devilishly delightful.
Leave my mother out of this! And… don’t use *dinner* in this context
That would be an amazing Thanksgiving.
Raphael could bring some great food, if nothing else.
What's better than a devil that you don't know? A devil that passes the turkey
You are the funniest person I know and I want to be best friends 😭😭😭
I mean if we're going for presentation, Astarion probably has no table manners anymore and stares at people's necks.
Loviatar is using Abdirak for PR. You think you'll get the perfect Dom and then BAM. Sadism to an inch of your life without the aftercare. Loviatar is kinda awful.
Don't care me want daddy
I mean... it's kinda working. I want Abdirak in my camp. We could always do with another cleric, Shadowheart wouldn't even mind the competition, she seemed to quite enjoy watching you getting railed.
Loviatar can be awful all she wants if I get the aftercare king.
What I'm hearing is, get your sado-dom fix with Abdirak then go to gentle-switch Halsin for the aftercare. Fuck, my BG3 Hunk Harem is getting more complex.
I agree with this and wish you subscribe to your blog where you note the adventures of your Harem.
your down bad for…a lobotomized corpse?
There are dumber guys out there let's be real
Clean off the blood, and put a nice hat on him and you’d never know!
To be clear: is it the corpse, Us, or a combo of them both?
Just the corpse, brain is optional Us is just a little dawg I'd keep him around as a pet but that's about it
Us is a KITTY CAT excuse u
Cats can be dawgs too
…I can accept this premise
i fucking adore this sub
Durge moment
LMAO it’s the fucking picture I took of my screen with my phone for my serving cunt post, I’m dying that you used it
OMG THAT WAS YOU yessss tysm that was literally was one of the main inspirations for this post
I was inspired by my grad school friend (it looks like him) who told me he was walking back to his apartment one night a heard someone running up behind him and all he could think of was the Shrek fairy godmother serve cunt and die meme till the person eventually just ran past him.
Sounds like an icon tbh, on that half-elf face 5 grindset
This killed me and made my brain jump out of my skull, thanks kind redditor
Fair enough
I wouldn't agree with you if I didn't experience how stupid humanity can truly get
your comments are making me need my inhaler 😂😂😂
a *mewing* lobotomized corpse
Holy fuck you are right, how did I not notice
You can’t look at that elf and not recognize that he is absolutely serving cunt
he’s so cunty tho
https://preview.redd.it/gndgy6jdujvc1.jpeg?width=1079&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=546f9884fbdfb68b1482ba5776d68b35d7559777
They look a little bit more than a lobotomized corpse.
Is it really a lobotomy if 30% of the head is chopped off entirely and the entire brain is missing?
https://preview.redd.it/zoxx71haygvc1.jpeg?width=400&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cee489130418014221f5220420bcd7238b4adbc6
My intrusive thought shoulder angel 👼
Whenever I make bad decisions from now on I’ll blame it on him and his influence
I was going 'this is pretty socially acceptable in okb and BG3 subreddits' when #8 gave me a jump scare. Where is Minthara when you need her?
Give the word and I will kill the clown. We will be praised as heroes.
Your parents would be right to question your attraction to True Soul Nere. That accursed male has the personality and grace of a Third Son. That they would find him more acceptable than Loviatar’s Priest, however, is beyond comprehension.
I'm gonna say I judge you more for Nere (though same) than Abdirak (also same).
I love how the man with a clean assisted lobotomy is still more socially acceptable than zombie Captain Scalpel Hook
Your list started strong but took a deep plumet before the halfway mark. I need a graph to show you what I mean.
https://preview.redd.it/i1tnq4y8ehvc1.png?width=3840&format=png&auto=webp&s=ad96a9c11403162da90b073c080ab87963aa09c6
Thank you for the visual! This is exactly what I mean.
Are you referring to Dribble the Clown or Dribble the Clown Pelvis?
Good question-- possessed-but-living Dribbles for preference, if I had to choose one body part though it'd be the torso
Body pillow
If you had non-changeling real and alive Dribbles how would that change your list? Would that put him higher up?
He would no longer be on the list, the brain worm gives him a certain je ne sais quoi
Least insane r/okbuddybaldur user
My type is angst-ridden elf men who would gaslight me into working more to pay all the bills while they read books on philosophy all day and contribute nothing to the household.
It’s the pointy ears
https://preview.redd.it/a78nbyer4hvc1.jpeg?width=1000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2f758fd3a6076f5c70a71dcb89ef9a04c4584710 same OP
Petition to put Abdirak after Raph cause I’m pretty sure my parents would be more appreciative of a consent and aftercare king than a dude who kicked someone into lava because his elevator got stalled.
Agreed but do we know he's about that aftercare life? Consent yes, but I don't remember him offering me any orange slices or ointment after.
It's a secret cutscene you have to unlock by passing the insight check, and I guess your whole party failed.
... okay that makes me so sad though. What stats need boosting to get the "painslut daddy feeds me orange slices and tells me I did well and he's proud of me" scene??!?1!? I'll respec this bitch right now.
It's purely luck based, as it only plays if you get a Nat20.
*Warms up my F5-pressin' finger* Time to go get beaten up a whole bunch.
For science... of course
And just who says that science and joy cannot coexist?
How is Nere more acceptable than Abdirak? Nere looks like he'd get angry if you made what he asked, for dinner.
He'd ask for nuggies and get mad because he really wanted Mac and cheezies.
I don’t understand how Raphael is more socially acceptable than myself.
Raphael bathes, and you know he uses those nice scented oils.
No no, you’re not socially unacceptable. They’re just afraid y’all would get mobbed by citizens vying for your attention every time you went out. Therefore, making it unacceptable to go out socially.
Don't listen to them. You're perfect and you've never done anything wrong, ever, in your whole life
Because Raphael at least has us write a contract when he screws us over and you sell people into slavery (without contracts)? Gotta cover your ass legally Mate
My lord, may I remind you that you’re an underground arm dealer, slaver and you torture people. Edit, Oh you’re also responsible for explosive toys for refugees. (But I still love you ✨)
Kar’niss my beloved
I want him so baddd
The dridussy calls me home
you are so based
Gortash should go all in on the blue tips. It's a good look for him. I'm talking about his hair
Good to see some He Who Was simping! 🙌🏻
He has the benefit of being both extremely attractive, and trying to make me take orders from a raven, my faith legally obliges me to obey the raven.
He who fucks is #2 on my simp list after Ascended Astarion.
Love to see a fellow simp but i cannot reciprocate on the AAstarion, he a bitch boi
's OK. I just have a thing for white haired elves with issues....what can I say!
And my mom was shooketh when i said penguin from the batman movie i watched as a kid was hot 😒
Okay Danny Devito's Penguin is too far even for me what And this is coming from someone who has a thing for evil clowns ever since watching 1989's Joker as a kid
hey man what the fuck how are you gonna be attracted to a clown that shape shifts into a skinless monster and call Danny ugly??
Looking at this comment from the broken wreckage of my glass house
Ok ok in my DEFENSE i was a kid when i had that crush. Kid me was into some weird shit 😭
how is he who was more controversial than Raphael? that dude is hot.
Because the devil has decorum, he who was not
Because He Who Was also has a raven that might tell your mother to kill herself.
cunty lobotomized elf, thats so real
Ty but Astarion was designed to be attractive, not a super hot take
First - fourth “ohhhkay?” Fifth - seventh “ehhh” Eighth “NO!” Ninth “NOO!” Tenth “NOOO!”
Tenth “FUCK YEAH LET’S GOOOOO”
https://preview.redd.it/md5j2slcdhvc1.jpeg?width=600&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1ae553d0b4105901319d072d0b3efefb44cd40de
This goes super hard for a meme with a cat on it!
You were right, those were increasingly socially unacceptable choices
Tbh gortash is great at schmoozing I bet he’d do well at a meet the parents dinner
im sorry, DRIBBLES?!!?
MALUS MENTIONED 🔥🔥‼️‼️🔊🔊‼️🗣️🗣️🔊🔥‼️ WHAT THE HELL IS A SPARING OPTION 🔥‼️🔊🗣️‼️🔥‼️🔥🔥🔥
imagine being so hot your name is a PHRASE
Bro, you good? XD
all fine except karniss (a minor cuz he lacks palpal bulbs)
1&2: “Yes, BIG same.” 3&4: “I wouldn’t kick them out of bed.” 5&6: “Yeah, okay…” 7&8: “Hmm…” 9&10: “…oh…”
You should find a healthy father figure
Why do you think Malus is there? The way daddy talks to his nurses, so fatherly and teacherly, I need him in my life so bad 😌
It’s bold to assume that there are okbuddybaldur users who had a healthy father or mother figure in their life
Those would all make for great ones! Especially the first 2.
Yeah, I'm down for some of Loviatar's love. And some sbussy. But you lost me on the clown. Just like everyone's favorite fruit bat, I have standards.
On the one hand, one is a brainless corpse. On the other, the king of consent and after-care, Abdirak
The greatest philosophical question of all time: what that spider do??
All of these are fine except dribbles because of his fuckass hair. Makes me so mad.
https://preview.redd.it/u8qhxngzdhvc1.png?width=2560&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e68d83c0f4b61e9b07963c5b4b572331679bc9b2 Literally my Tav looking at Dribbles
withers! revoke their hair privileges!
Ngl, the triple whammy of Dribbles, Cunty Lobotomite Elf and Malus Thorm hit me like a crit smite to the dome
*Chk*. I can't be surprised that an *istik* on this site is attracted to a brainless corpse. Narcissism dowels run heavy in this place May Vlaakith claim you.
I am concerned that a person who is half-spider is more socially acceptable than a clown.
There is nothing wrong with the handsome man. 😤
That brainless guy has a huge hole... I , I got to go. Gotta do something real quick
Listen babes idk about you guys but I’m getting that driderussy
I saw Astarion first and had to double check that the list was going to be INCREASINGLY socially unacceptable. This subreddit is beyond strange and I love it lmao
WHERE IS HE DURGE
Why did they make the lobotomised guys portrait so cunty
Hey, at least Abdirak has hobbies
I audibly laughed in front of everyone in my shared office
Should've put Gortash last tbh
It started good and then it went downhill
Nere? Really?
You should be ashamed of yourself
DRIBBLES???
10/10 I agree on all, excellent taste my friend.
Mhhhhh Astarion and Raphael <3
Casting a wide net I see
I was like stupidly into Gribbo. https://preview.redd.it/7md5prbyqivc1.jpeg?width=1039&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=69aa2ab876935bebce6841ca459dd12060f23741
https://preview.redd.it/k0q64nr67jvc1.jpeg?width=408&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d2319bef0aa5133c03c5478dc60474f13cbe1287
You’re so real for number 9
...*Fucking Dribbles?*
Tbh all but the last few are pretty normal for here.
Nope, get out
I was with you until 8, OP, but that’s a little too far.
List got more unhinged as it went on...
This is Priestess Gut erasure.
Wait who is the ninth one?
Pretty tame for this server
Unacceptable. Orin didn't show up anywhere.
Huntyyyy….we need to talk about what’s lead to your choices in men
Whats the order tho
No Baltazar?
ok u gotta explain the last two bc jfc
Dribbles took me tf out hahaha
I thought the brainless dead guy couldn't be topped, but I guess that's true in two ways.
Dribbles Clussy
100% agree on all but the last two, the only brainless corpse for me is astarion :)
1-5 I don't get the appeal. 6-10 I'm not personally into, but I get it
Give the word and I will kill the clown. We will be praised as heroes.
No brain. Serves cunt. Seems legit.
I love that they still had a whole profile picture pose for the lobotomized dude 😂
Are you referring to doppleganger Dribbles, pre-dismembered Dribbles, or undead Dribbles?
The last few??? Bro?
Ah, into bad boys, surgeons, guys comfortable with some kinkier activities and men with open minds. I don’t see how any of this is unacceptable. Chase your bliss, hero.
Who cares about being socially acceptable though 😂
https://preview.redd.it/8pkxir3p4jvc1.jpeg?width=3148&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f72746bbe4ce3d8a1059a576c770d7722a0a7c9e
I‘m happy that you didn‘t post Minthara. Because Minthy is my „ride or die“. I love her!
Where's Wulbern
Gortash is soooo fine
Why does reddit have this recent trend of simping for video game toons? Go talk to to a real girl/man, strike up a convo or even ask for the time from. Video games wont love you back
I…want to die
“INCREASINGLY socially unacceptable” Starts the list with a literal bloodsucker.
Im down bad for all of them too, I would add Aradin as well
I agree with 1 2 5 6 and 7
I think Astarion is socially acceptable along with raphael But Kar's niss my belove
God, that pic of Gorty always gets me bc while I *know* that’s light from something hitting the right side of his hair, my brain insists on seeing it as a blue streak in his emo bangs.
I love how a clown is worse than a literal demon
NOT DRIBBLES
you just like pointy eared men
https://preview.redd.it/ubmo1a4flmvc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f1bb7492a58cfdc60b630ffa0e9942de0bb6bd2e
Why is no one saying Sazza?